What's in a Name
by bloodydarkwolf
Summary: What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet...He didn't ask for this. He didn't ask to be hated. He didn't ask to be a freak. He didn't even asked to be born. It wasn't his fault, but they hated him anyway.
1. Prolouge

**Disclaimer: I only own my made up characters. I don't own Warriors or any of the real characters.**

**Warnings: cursing, violence, abuse**

**Cats met in this chapter: (only the ones not actually from the book)**

**Reaper- black she-cat. Mother of Darkstripe. From BloodClan**

**Darkstripe aka Darkkit- silver and black tabby tom with icy blue eyes. Son of Reaper and Darkstripe. From BloodClan but brought to ShadowClan**

**Snaketail- harsh, brown she-cat with a black tail. Mother of Ratkit and foster mother to Darkkit. From ShadowClan**

**Ratkit- sickly brown tom. Last living kit of Snaketail. From ShadowClan**

**Frost- battle-scarred silver tom with light blue eyes. From BloodClan**

**Honeydew- deceptive gold she-cat. Originally a kitty-pet but now living in BloodClan**

**Slash- black and white tom. Originally a kitty-pet but now in BloodClan **

**Gingerstripe (name is not mentioned in this chapter) - large orange tabby. Father of Windpaw and Tigerpaw (not met in this chapter) mate of Thistlefeather (not mentioned in this chapter)**

**Oakbelly- white and black tom with brown belly. Former mate of Snaketail and father of her kits. Died in battle with BloodClan.**

~*~

"_What's in a name?_

_That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet."_

_-Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare_

_The she-cat walked silently into the night, between buildings and avoiding thundering monsters. In her jaws dangled precious cargo, a kit, barely more than a moon old. His eyes had barely opened and he looked intently around at the enormous, dark world that surrounded him. She avoided being seen by other cats at all cost. If they knew what she was doing and who she was carrying, they might kill him. No, they WOULD kill him and possibly her as well._

_The black she-cat's name was Reaper. Her sister was Sasha. Sasha had taken her kits into the forest and they had been accepted there easily enough. BloodClan was not safe anymore, well it had never been safe, but now Scourge was gone and there was no order. Perhaps her kit would be able to have a better life in the forest and maybe even become a leader._

_That would be perfect. Tigerstar had been a leader, perhaps Darkstripe's son would have the same ambition, she was sure he would have plenty of skill. _

_How she had been attracted to Darkstripe she was unsure of. Or had he been the one attracted to her first? She didn't know. Perhaps it was his quiet, secretive personality. Maybe it was his icy blue eyes watching her everywhere she went or his devotion to Tigerstar and his plan. Whatever it was, she had followed his striped tail into the two-leg shed that night. It had been the night before Tigerstar was going to lead BloodClan into the forest in front of the other clans._

'_The day is upon us, Reaper. Tigerstar will finally rule the forest as he should and BloodClan will be right beside us. We shall run the forest the way it was meant to be run, and our kits will have a perfect home with us in the trees, or the moor, or by the river, wherever you like. It might be hard to get the forest the way we want it, and it might take some time, but we will manage. Tigerstar told me that as long as we have Scourge and all of BloodClan on our side, there is no way we can be stopped,' Darkstripe had said to her that night. And of course the next day BloodClan had entered the forest. But they had no intentions of serving Tigerstar or uniting the forest._

'_BloodClan, attack!' Tigerstar shouted. No cat moved. Reaper looked down at the scene that would unfold. No cat ordered Scourge to do anything ever. Tigerstar was killed. The scene didn't bother Reaper, but it seemed to have killed Darkstripe. She had hoped he would stay and fight with BloodClan and join them, but he hadn't._

'_I have no one, Reaper. I have no clan, no family, and no home. I'm finished. I will go to the battle tomorrow, but I will not fight for BloodClan, nor will I fight for the forest clans. I will kill that kittypet or die trying. That's what Tigerstar did, and that's all I can do. He was my mentor. I learn from him and do as he does.' Those were the last words he ever spoke to Reaper before he died. His life ended by a long haired tom just before he succeeded in his task. _

_Reaper had almost died herself by watching what had happened, but she had to go on. For Darkstripe, and for his kit. The kit he never knew about because she had never been able to tell him. She had seen the light go from his cold blue eyes and then close forever as his blood drained from his body._

'_One less traitor in the forest, the better,' the grey tom had spat. Reaper cursed him. And she cursed the ginger tom Darkstripe had hated so. But none of that mattered now. All that mattered was taking care of all that remained of her love._

_She dodged into an alley and hid under a dumpster, putting her kit down. She heard other cats approaching and she mustn't be seen. The black and silver tabby kitten mewled and she quickly placed her paws over his head, closing his mouth between her weight and the pavement. His throat released another mewl and she pressed a little harder._

"_Hush Darkstripe, please, you must be silent or they will kill us," she whispered to him. The cats here had rejected Tigerstar and had no care for Darkstripe either. This kit was not wanted. He was an outcast and a bastard. His life meant nothing to any of the other cats, only to her, so she must save him. It was the first time in her life that Reaper cared about anyone but herself._

_The cats left and she waited until she could no longer hear their paw-steps before she released her son's head and crawled out from her hiding space with him in her jaws. She glanced down the street and, seeing no one, continued towards the forest._

_She did not intend to send him to the clan her sister had chosen, her kit had no one there. His cousins would probably reject him, not having gotten a chance to know who he was. Nor did she intend to put him with his father's birth-clan. Those cats cared far too much for their own righteousness and dignity. They were not fitting for the son of Darkstripe._

_No the she-cat had something else in mind for her son. She had chosen the cats whose honor and dignity were forgotten in battle. The cats who thought a fair fight was as pointless as the cat they were destroying. The cats whose coats were darker and sleeker than the others. The cats whose coats were stained with the blood of their enemies before the other clans could cry out from their own coats being torn. The cats that did not discriminate their opponents. Young and frightened or old and weak, all were enemies. The other clans had seemed to hang back from their darker cousins, but Reaper sought them out. True, they were responsible for brutally killing many of her 'clan', but she had seen their skill and this was to be her son's new home._

_She hung back at the edge of the forest, she must enter here. She must ensure that she was ever so careful so as to prevent premature detection by her former mate's birth-clan. The kit began to squirm in discomfort of being carried for such a long time. She placed him down gently so that he would not cry out._

"_Not much farther little one. We must hurry, you must get to your new home before sunrise," she cooed and lay down. The kit crawled to her and began to feed. She looked down and swelled with pride at her only son. He was identical to his father in every way except for lack of a small scar across his nose. Leaving him would be hard, but she must do it, for him._

_The kit finished his meal and she quickly licked him clean. His brilliant blue eyes began to close as he grew tired from a full, warm belly and she picked him up again. She took a deep breath as she entered the forest. The scent of prey and fresh air and other cats invaded her nose. She stepped over and thru the underbrush on the forest floor. She could smell the scent barriers laid down by members of this clan._

_It seemed like an eternity had passed that she went thru some underbrush with such a heavy canopy that the sky was completely blacked out. In other places the moon shone down on her sleek black pelt so much that she was sure she glowed. She finally reached the long, black human path that would lead her to her destination on the other side. She investigated the side until she found a tunnel leading under the path. She crawled thru and emerged on the other side._

_She looked around and saw the briars and tall grass that lead to the ShadowClan camp. She saw the crude tunnels burrowed by the cats thru this obstacle. She cautiously stepped in, holding the kit close to her chest to prevent injury to him. She picked her way thru the prickly mass and as she did she felt a cool breeze blowing around. There was a soft rustling noise of the grass and she could see it beginning to be worn down more and more, signifying much traffic. These cats must be experts at seeing in the dark because nearly this entire place was shrouded in darkness from the tall grass and bushes._

_She tilted her head to the side and could hear that this clan was still awake, or at least several members were. This clan resided in the night, that was good for so did BloodClan since light brought more humans. She saw the camp entrance and hesitantly stepped in. Her presence was noticed immediately. The cats jumped up as though they had been expecting her._

"_What business do you have here?!" a large, orange tabby hissed._

"_You do not belong here!" a grey tom she recognized as Boulder shrieked._

"_This coming from a traitor," Reaper retorted. Boulder hissed._

"_Enough!" a large white tom with black paws shouted as he stepped forward. The others dipped their heads and stepped back in respect._

"_Are you the leader?" Reaper asked not moving accept to ensure her kit was close with her paw._

"_I am. And who are you?" the tom asked._

"_I am Reaper of BloodClan and I have come with a request. I wish to leave my kit in the care of your clan," she said. The tom looked down at the kit._

"_And what makes you think we want a stray such as this?" he asked, noting the kit's appearance._

"_He is Darkstripe's son, he has no home in BloodClan," Reaper rasped._

"_And what makes you think he would have a home here? Why not choose ThunderClan?" the tom questioned._

_Reaper scoffed, "That clan meant nothing to Darkstripe, it shall mean nothing to his son." The tom paused and seemed to be thinking about something before turning to address a grey and white tom whose nose was running and a ginger she-cat. After a short conversation with them, the white tom turned to her again._

"_What is the kit's name?" he asked._

"_Darkstripe," Reaper responded. A murmur went out among the cats but the tom silenced them with a flick of his tail._

"_Very well, he may stay, but you must leave and not return," he said firmly. Reaper dipped her head._

"_Very well and thank you," she said and licked her kit's ear before turning and leaving him. Boulder was sent to accompany her to the edge of the territory._

_When Boulder left her to travel beneath the path, she flicked her tail in a farewell and slipped back into the trees. As she moved farther and farther away from her son she got a slightly hollow feeling but she forced herself to brush it off. Now was not the time for that. She traveled thru the forest with the same silence she had before but with more speed as the sun threatened to rise and she emerged from the forest at dawn. She hoped to get through two-leg place with the same luck, but that was not to be. Sitting on a fence was a light silver tom as well as a black and white tom and a gold she-cat. They lept down and surrounded her._

"_What have you been doing in the forest, Reaper?" the silver tom known as Frost asked coldly._

"_Yes, fraternizing with the enemy?" the she-cat, Honeydew, asked in a high-pitched and eerie tone._

"_No," Reaper answered, looking straight ahead as they all circled her._

"_Then what was it?" Slash, the black and white tom, hissed._

"_I was just going for a walk," she said with a shrug._

"_I don't think so. Where's your little baby, Reaper?" Frost asked his light blue, almost white eyes seemed to burn into her deep green ones. _

"_What makes you think I would have a kit?" Reaper asked growing worried but trying to maintain her composure. Reaper's eyes tracked to the multiple scars criss-crossing his muscular chest and a shiver rippled up her spine but she hid it._

_Frost laughed. "Because we knew you were pregnant and you aren't now," he answered._

"_So what did you do with him, Reaper? You don't seem like the type that would kill your kit," Honeydew growled lightly. This she-cat could make her voice sound so pleasant, yet would kill you in an instant. Honeydew had been favored by Scourge because of her incredible ability to play with a cat's head. She was the mistress of mental torture and could draw an answer out of the most skilled liar. Reaper could only think of one way out of this. She hung her head, she was sure not to look at Honeydew's blazing yellow eyes or she would stand no chance at getting away with a lie._

"_He died," she said trying to sound full of sorrow. She didn't notice Slash behind her until it was too late._

"_She's lying! She smells like the forest cats!" he shrieked. Reaper's eyes grew wide as she looked around the group. Damn Slash, he never could keep his nose to himself now he was going to be the death of her!_

_Frost shook his head. "Tsk tsk, Reaper, you know the price for lying and betraying us," Frost said almost casually. He was a born killer, having no mercy or remorse. His blood ran as cold as the frost he took his name from, his looks had nothing to do with it. He twitched his ears and all three of them attacked at once. The teeth driven into the collars of Slash and Honeydew glinting in the early morning light and the silvery scars covering Frost's chest were all she saw before a myriad of claws._

_A short scream was all that was heard when Reaper's life ended._

_-_

_Blackstar looked down at the tiny, frightened kit before him. The clan was murmuring something about Darkstripe, but he wasn't paying attention. This kit bore a remarkable resemblance to his father hence his name fit him perfectly. Now what was he supposed to do with him?_

"_Well, Blackstar? Are you going to rename him or not?" Runningnose asked, nudging his leader gently._

"_No. He will keep his name. He will be Darkstripekit, but call him Darkkit if you choose. Is that understood?" Blackstar asked the clan. The cats murmured their understanding. "Good, um…" Blackstar looked around to his medicine cat for help on what to do next._

"_We need a queen to foster him," Runningnose told him._

"_Yes, of course," Blackstar recovered quickly. He wasn't even born here. How he had managed to become leader of these cats was a mystery to him, but with all the troubles they had encountered, he wanted to be a good leader. "You lot go to sleep. Runningnose, Littlecloud, come with me," he ordered. Runningnose and his apprentice nodded. Russetfur, his deputy, turned and went to the warrior's den. Blackstar picked up the kit and carried him to the queen's den, followed by the medicine cats._

_There was, currently, only one queen in the nursery. She had only one kit: Ratkit. Her name was Snaketail. She was bad-tempered and harsh. Her brown fur and black tail made her blend seamlessly into the darkness that was ShadowClan's home. But how she had managed to get a mate was a mystery. Oakbelly had been the only cat she had ever been kind to and he was her exact opposite. He had died in the battle with BloodClan and Ratkit was all she had left. _

_Ratkit was a small, sickly brown tom. He was the soul survivor of his litter and he was fading fast. His white sister had been still-born while his black sister hadn't survived her third night. He had not been able to fight in the battle like the other kits had and, as a result, Snaketail had stayed as well. Littlecloud and Runningnose were doing everything they could for him, but he didn't stand much of a chance. Snaketail, however, refused to accept this and was convinced that Ratkit would be fine and simply needed to grow a little stronger 'which he would in time' and he 'would soon be the strongest kit the clan had seen since Shadowstar's rule'. No one else shared her opinion._

_Snaketail looked up when her leader and medicine cats entered the nursery. At first she expected them to come with more grave news that she wasn't likely to listen to, but Blackstar was holding something. Upon closer examination, the small creature was a kit._

"_What's this?" Snaketail hissed when Blackstar set the bundle down next to her._

"_This is your new charge," Blackstar told her._

_Snaketail sniffed the kit. "I don't want a new charge. He'll only be a distraction from my precious Ratkit," she hissed, nuzzling her head into the barely-conscious kitten. He mewled a weak response before falling unconscious. _

_Littlecloud sighed, "Snaketail, Ratkit doesn't have a very good chance at even making it until the next gathering, let alone able to be an apprentice. He can hardly even open his eyes half-way."_

_Snaketail launched herself at Littlecloud with the full brunt of her furry. "What do you know?! You have no sense! I can't see why StarClan would bother to make a medicine cat out of a mouse-brain like you!" she shrieked._

_Littlecloud, having been trained as a warrior, easily rolled on top of her and pinned her down. "StarClan have more sense than you do," he growled before releasing her. Blackstar seemed stunned at the small tabby's outburst but Runningnose knew what his apprentice was capable of and actually praised him for his actions, to himself, of course. _

"_Whether you want him or not, he's your kit now. His name is Darkstripekit. Do with him what you will," Blackstar said and exited the den._

"_Littlecloud, bring me some herbs for little Ratkit, his breathing is labored again," Runningnose instructed his apprentice. Littlecloud nodded and ran out. He returned a short time later with a small bundle. Runningnose thanked him and set to work on Ratkit. Though he had never been able to successfully end his own draining nose, this kit had a problem that was much worse and the mucus caking his nasal passages was from a greater threat that lay far in his lungs where Runningnose could not reach._

_Runningnose cleaned his face and reopened the kit's breathing passage before having him inhale an herb and eat a painkiller as well as an antibiotic. After disinfecting Ratkit's nose and throat, Runningnose could do no more for him. He turned his attention to Darkkit, who seemed perfectly healthy and Littlecloud had confirmed this. Runningnose gently nudged him towards his adoptive mother._

"_Goodnight, Snaketail. May StarClan be with you and your kits," he said and left the den. Littlecloud turned to follow but was stopped by Snaketail._

"_Hey, apprentice, where does this kit come from?" she asked._

"_His mother brought him here from BloodClan. His father was Darkstripe, obviously. You may call him Darkkit, but I doubt you would," the tabby answered coldly before leaving the den._

_Snaketail snorted, "Damn right I won't. Blackstar told me to do with him what I will. He probably should have been more specific. Oh well," she purred to herself and pushed the kit away as he began to crawl towards her for warmth._

_Darkkit watched her from the other side of the nursery. He was cold. He had been cold before, but his mother's body was normally next to him to make it better. What did his mother look like? He couldn't remember. He had only seen her for a few days since his eyes had opened. He remembered her scent though. This cat was not his mother. Who she was, he did not know. She did not like him, but he didn't know what to do about it. He didn't even know what was going on. He wanted his mother. He wanted to be not as cold, but none of that mattered now. He curled his small body around himself and closed his eyes, trying to make his body stop trembling. Other kits would have whined, but his mother had taught him early to be quiet when she was not there, so he would._

___

_It was not long after dawn that Darkkit raised his head and tilted it to the side. Snaketail and Ratkit were asleep curled up together and he had finally been able to curl up and sleep several tail-lengths away since Snaketail had shown no interest in having him sleep anywhere near her. Whether Ratkit would have complained or not was unknown since Darkkit wasn't even sure Ratkit was aware of his presence. The night had been cold and with his short coat sleep hadn't come easy but he had managed it. But now, something was troubling him. _

_He opened his bright eyes, looked out in the direction of two-leg place and uttered a single word._

"_Momma?" _

**Ok so that's the prologue. I don't know for sure what color Darkstripe's eyes were because in one book it says ice blue while in another they are described as amber. So I'm going with blue just because I like it. So I hope you liked this and feel free to review. And Darkkit has a special gift that you will find out later. Ok see ya.**


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I only own my own characters and am not making any money from this story**

**Warnings: violence, cursing, abuse**

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Mudriver- dirty grey long-haired tom with yellow eyes. Mentor of Darkpaw and brother of Thundertail**

**Thundertail- black she-cat with a crooked yellow tail and yellow eyes. Sister of Mudriver**

**Tigerpaw- white and orange tabby tom. Mentored by and son of Gingerstripe and brother of Windpaw. Mothered by Thistlefeather (not mentioned in this chapter)**

**Windpaw- white she-cat with silver legs. Mentored by Blackstar and daughter of Gingerstripe and Thistlefeather (not mentioned in this chapter) **

**Thicketpaw- brown and white she-cat. Mentored by Boulder. Daughter of Ruckus and Snip (not mentioned in this chapter)**

**Speckledpaw- calico tom. Mentored by Darkflower. Son of Russetfur and Jaggedtooth (each from book but not mentioned in this chapter)**

Darkkit carried the mouse back to the nursery from the fresh-kill pile. His small teeth dug into the flesh and the scent made his mouth water. It was all he could do to keep from eating it right now. It had been three moons since he had arrived here and Snaketail had been using him as a little servant the entire time. At first it had been difficult to drag the pieces of prey she demanded to the nursery. Sometimes she would change her mind of what she wanted and make him go back.

His stomach growled in protest of his lack of eating. He entered the nursery as though it were a dream. He was loosing touch with reality again and he knew it. He dropped the mouse at Snaketail's paws.

"That's it? You stupid kit I said 'a plump, juicy mouse' and what's this? You drooled on it? You're disgusting!" Snaketail hissed at him.

"Let every cat old enough to catch their own prey come here for a clan meeting," Blackstar's deep rehearsed voice called. Darkkit remained where he was, staggering slightly from a heavy blow Snaketail had delivered to the side of his head a moment ago. He didn't remember receiving the blow. It was more like she had lifted her paw and the pain just happened.

Snaketail heard Blackstar's voice and growled, "I'll be back for you later," into Darkkit's ear. He just remained there in a daze. Ratkit had died not long after his arrival and since then Snaketail had taken to tormenting him and blaming him for her son's death.

He looked around and realized he was alone. Or was he alone? Was he just hallucinating that he was alone? It had been nearly three days since Snaketail had allowed him to sleep. That coupled with the lack of food she gave him made his mind whirl and he was often loosing touch with reality.

The state of innocence in a kit's mind should be maintained until they are at least five moons old, which is why kits didn't become apprentices until six moons. In a loving and caring environment, this mentality is easy to maintain. Unfortunately, that is not where Darkkit was. Snaketail was tormenting him nonstop trying to see how far she could push him. His mental state was at a great risk. It was possible that his moods might become unpredictable or aggressive, but Snaketail didn't care.

Neither Blackstar nor Littlecloud bothered to check on him and simply allowed Snaketail to do whatever she wished. Runningnose was now an elder and seemed to figure that if the kit was exiting the nursery he must be at least close to alright.

Darkkit wasn't sure he was alone, but upon sniffing the air, he realized that Snaketail actually had left. He collapsed into an immediate sleep.

The abuse he had received from Snaketail prevented him from having the sweet dreams of rolling in the grass or chasing a bug that a normal kit would have. His dreams were nightmares. He was always waking in fear thinking that something terrible had happened or was happening. Never the less, Darkkit adored sleep. He wanted sleep because it released him from the hold of this world. Of course, his hallucinations also contributed to that.

Snaketail loved to watch him as he would run in terror from a non-existent dog or badger or fox that she told him exaggerated stories about. He would sometimes stagger back from a blow that she had never delivered or whimper in fear of her while she was asleep on the other side of the den.

His nightmare came, like he knew it would. He writhed and whimpered as it took him to a world of terror, but at least it was far from the real world his body inhabited.

_

"_Come, come here Darkkit," Snaketail said gently. Darkkit inhaled. Something smelled different about her. He knew that scent._

"_Momma!!!" he cried and ran to her. She nuzzled and spoke to him softly. There was no hurt to be inflicted, only sweet gentle comfort. But something was wrong. His mother scent was indeed there, but the smell of life was absent. Snaketail started to laugh then disappeared. Darkkit gasped and spun around._

"_You stupid kit! No one loves you! You are an orphan and a bastard. Your mother abandoned you. Even she didn't want you!" she shouted at him and delivered a blow to the side of his head. He reeled back and when he regained his footing, Snaketail was gone. Fire started pouring into the den, licking at his fur and singeing it. It hurt. It hurt like a sharp blow to his body for that was the only pain he knew. The pain was immense. Worse than what Snaketail could deliver, yet horridly familiar._

_He screamed for help, but he just heard laughing. He looked up and saw the rest of the clan. They were perfectly fine. They were shouting and scorning him and…laughing! How dare they laugh at him? He wanted to claw their throats out. He would make that stupid sound stop. Snaketail laughed at him. Snaketail laughed at him everyday and he hated it. He hated her. He hated them and they hated him but he didn't need them. He would get them, he would make them stop. They would stop forever._

"_Darkstripe. Darkstripe! WAKE UP!!!" Snaketail shouted._

_

Darkkit felt his body being rolled back and forth between Snaketail's paws as she hissed at him to wake up. His dream dissolved and his eyes shot open. He hissed suddenly and swiped at Snaketail's nose, tearing it open.

She screeched and reeled back. Littlecloud ran in, eyes wide in alarm.

"What happened?!" he said looking around and seeing Snaketail bleeding.

"He scratched me! That little bastard scratched me!" she screeched as blood ran down her nose and a few drops splashed onto Darkkit's forehead before he spun away from her with lightening-quick speed that even the best warrior would have trouble matching.

Littlecloud looked over and saw Darkkit sitting not far from them. His eyes were narrowed and his lips were curled into a sneer that would have disturbed him if it was on the most bloodthirsty warrior. Darkkit's shoulders were hunched forward and his head was dipped forward slightly as he watched the result of his work.

"S-snaketail, what did you _do_ to him?" Littlecloud stuttered, deeply disturbed by the kit that he saw. Blood trickled down his face, across his cheek and into his sneering mouth and he proceeded to lick it off his teeth.

"Whatever the hell I want. That's what Blackstar told me to do," she growled, but when she looked at Darkkit, her fur prickled.

High-pitched laughter suddenly rang thru the den. "What's the matter, Littlecloud? Scared?" Darkkit hissed in a voice that made the adult cats' blood run cold. It reminded them of Scourge, but younger with a deceiving hint of innocence. Darkkit rarely spoke, in fact, Littlecloud had never heard him speak and Snaketail only heard him when he whined in his sleep but nothing ever like this.

"Snaketail, go to my den…NOW!" Littlecloud ordered. Snaketail managed to tear her eyes away from the icy ones of the kit. His eyes were so cold. They seemed to have the power to freeze anything that looked into them. She quickly left the den. Darkkit watched her go, his sneer still decorating his face. "Wait here," Littlecloud ordered him and left the den as well.

Darkkit rolled his eyes. Where the hell would he go if he left anyway? He lay down in a small heap of dried moss and leaves that he had claimed as his nest and waited to see what would happen.

_

"Blackstar, I'm worried. I don't know what this kit has been going thru, but whatever it is has had a big effect on his mental state," Littlecloud told his leader.

Blackstar glared at Snaketail who was sitting near the entrance of the leader's den. "Come here," he ordered. Snaketail took a deep breath and walked further into the den. "What did you do to him?" Blackstar demanded.

"You told me to do with him what I would, and that's what I did," she said trying to maintain her attitude but Blackstar looked furious and it was making her unnerved.

"We have to do something, Blackstar. He can't stay like this. We need to make him interact with the other cats or _something_," the tabby said.

Blackstar put his paw on his head. This was getting very complicated and he had never done well with that. "What if we made him an apprentice?" he suggested.

"He's only four moons old, though," Littlecloud protested.

"Well do you have any other ideas, Littlecloud?!" Blackstar growled.

The small tabby thought for a moment then sighed, "None. But who will mentor him?"

Blackstar thought again. "What about Tawnypelt?" he asked.

"I'll bring her here," Littlecloud said and ran out.

"Do you still need me or not?" Snaketail asked in a flat tone.

"Go! Get out of my sight! You're back to your warrior duties now so go hunting!" Blackstar hissed with such force that Snaketail scrambled out immediately.

Littlecloud walked in with Tawnypelt. She looked confused as the senior warrior dashed past her but her attention was drawn to her leader.

"Tawnypelt, listen. I need a mentor for Darkkit. Would you-?" Blackstar was cut off.

"No way! I already have to deal with being a traitor's daughter. I'm not dealing with that little rat, too!" she hissed and the two toms were startled by her outburst. She realized what she had done and immediately dipped her head. "I-I'm sorry, Blackstar," she whispered.

"It's alright. I understand. Go back to what you were doing," Blackstar said gently. Tawnypelt nodded and left.

A young, grey, long-haired warrior watched her go. He poked his head into the den. "Heya, Blackstar. Littlecloud. Whatcha guys up to?" he asked, walking in without an invitation. His coat was messy and dirty, but he seemed unbothered by it.

"We're trying to find a mentor for Darkkit, Mudriver," Littlecloud explained. Blackstar's brow was furrowed as he tried to think of someone, anyone, to mentor Darkkit. Both the older cats were too preoccupied about Darkkit to notice the young tom break his code of silence.

"The little black and silver tabby? How hard could it be to find a mentor for him? He seems alright," Mudriver said.

"He's Darkstripe's son," Littlecloud reminded him. Mudriver looked unfazed.

"Maybe I should mentor him. No I already have Windpaw. What if someone else took her? Arg! This is too confusing," Blackstar muttered to himself.

"So what? He ain't done nothing wrong, has he?" the grey tom asked.

"He just attacked Snaketail, but that's it," Littlecloud confirmed.

"Is that what she was screeching about earlier? Hell, I thought badgers were attacking from the way she was carrying on, and besides I'd attack her too, mean old cat. Darkkit don't sound so bad. I'd mentor him," Mudriver said. Blackstar's head snapped up.

"Ok, he's yours. Littlecloud, get Darkkit out there. We're having a meeting" Blackstar said, getting up and walking out.

Mudriver stared. "But I just became a warrior a few minutes ago," he stammered.

"Then you'll be setting a record," Blackstar called back before jumping into the tree to start the meeting.

_

"Again?" Darkkit thought out loud as he heard Blackstar announce another meeting.

"Yes and this one's for you. Let's go," Littlecloud said, now standing at the entrance of the nursery.

"What're you guys gonna do? Banish me?" Darkkit scoffed.

"Nope," Littlecloud said, leading him to the meeting area. The other cats stared at him as he walked thru them to the front. Littlecloud had him sit just in front of a dirty grey warrior and stepped back.

"Mudriver, I realize that you and your sister just became warriors, but this is a special situation. You are going to mentor Darkstripekit, or Darkstripepaw as his name is now," the white leader said before leaping down. "Meeting adjourned," he mumbled. The cats stared at Darkpaw and Mudriver. Mudriver didn't move to touch noses with his apprentice. He doubted this kit would accept it.

Thundertail, Mudriver's sister, walked over to them. "Come on, let's go," she whispered to her brother. He nodded and led Darkpaw after him with his sister. The cats all continued to stare as they moved thru the crowed.

"Yech! It looks like we have to share a den with that damn rouge, Windpaw," a young orange and white tabby growled loud enough for everyone to hear. Darkpaw, growled, but Mudriver kept him moving forward.

"Don't be rude, Tigerpaw," the white and silver she-cat scolded her brother.

Tigerpaw snorted, "Well I'm not turning my back on him is all I'm saying."

Darkpaw's eyes remained narrowed as the other tom's voice faded behind him. Thundertail led them thru the underbrush and into the briars and thistles to a more secluded part of the territory where yellow-green grass grew. Darkpaw looked around. He hadn't been outside of the camp since he had been brought to the forest, a trip he couldn't remember. He hardly even saw the camp since Snaketail had kept him locked up in the nursery except to fetch her food, which he was required to do quickly.

Thundertail sighed and sat down. "Brother, do you know what you are doing? You barely even became a warrior and already they gave you this apprentice. He's only four moons old!" she exclaimed, looking at the small silver tabby kit.

"Well no one else would take him. And so what if he's young? He seems pretty advanced to me. He landed a good one on ol' Snaketongue earlier," Mudriver bragged.

Thundertail looked impressed but quickly changed it to a look of concern. "Her name is Snaketail and I don't know…" she doubtfully. Darkpaw snapped his head around to look at the two older cats.

"You can quit talking about me like I'm not here. I don't care what you think of me. I don't need any of you," he hissed. His voice had a youthful high pitch, but there was a dark undertone.

"You need me if you plan on being a warrior and having any hopes of getting any respect," Mudriver pointed out, "And me 'n my sis here might be the only friends you currently have a chance of getting."

Darkpaw scoffed. "I don't need friends and I don't need to be a warrior. If I want respect, I'll just take it."

"Sure, sure, you could do that. And show them all that they were right and that you really are just another rouge made worse by looking like Darkstripe," Mudriver said patiently.

"I am Darkstripe. You heard Blackstar. He said my name loud and clear for every one of you slobs to hear," Darkpaw retorted, secretly stung by the words.

"No you're not Darkstripe. You're Darkpaw and anyone who says otherwise is just as mouse-brained as you claim they are," Thundertail said.

Darkpaw stared at her. He hadn't expected this. They really seemed to want to help him. Or were they lying to him? Well, with no one else to trust and no one else even trying to come near him, he decided that perhaps he could grow use to this black she-cat and dirty, grey tom.

"Yeah. You're not their responsibility to judge anyway. You're my apprentice so me 'n Blackstar 'r the only ones who gotta be worrying with what you are, you got that?" Mudriver asked, approaching his apprentice.

Darkpaw didn't flinch at his approach. Whether this would bring him a blow or not was uncertain, but he feared nothing anymore. His claws flexed in their sheaths and his body braced, but no blow fell. Instead, Mudriver's nose gently touched his own for a quick moment before the tom pulled away again.

"You are my charge, do you understand?" Mudriver asked, sounding more serious. His yellow eyes pierced Darkpaw's ice ones.

Charge. Where had he heard that word before? And why did he get the feeling it hadn't brought anything good with it? These cats might be claiming to help him, but Snaketail had done that before too. Offering him a meal then scampering away from him with him too exhausted to follow suit. He did not trust these siblings, but, for now, they were all he had. He nodded his understanding to Mudriver who smiled.

"Good, now shall we go back to camp? It's getting late and your first day of training starts at dawn," Mudriver said.

"Yes we should go back. Blackstar will be wondering what happened to us, not to mention we aren't supposed to be talking," Thundertail agreed. She turned into the bracken, her black body soon becoming invisible in the darkness and her crooked yellow tail seeming to float along like a ghost. Darkpaw followed her with Mudriver right behind.

Every cat looked up when they entered camp. They followed Darkpaw with their eyes. He did not look at them, but Darkpaw could feel their eyes burning into him. It felt as if they were trying to see into his soul.

'_I hope what you see frightens you to your very core,' _Darkpaw thought to himself.

"I'll meet you at the camp entrance, Thundertail. I'm just going to take Darkpaw to the apprentice's den," Mudriver told his sister, stopping Darkpaw from traveling instinctually back to the nursery. Thundertail nodded and trotted away.

Mudriver led him to a hollow next to a small, dead stump. Tigerpaw was lying on his back at the top while Windpaw gently batted his contently twitching tail. Upon seeing Mudriver and Darkpaw approach she shook her brother's leg and he opened his eyes. He rolled over and leered down at the younger tom.

"Mudriver, why did you bring _that _here? You don't know where it's been," he sneered, his lips curling upward in disgust.

"Hush, Tigerpaw, no one knows where you've been either," Mudriver retorted.

Windpaw giggled but Tigerpaw just rolled his eyes. "Whatever, just don't expect me to get anywhere near it. Unlike some, I would prefer the other clans view us as the noble cats we are. Not a bunch of rouges like they mistake us as. Besides, aren't you supposed to shut up and guard the camp or something now?" he said before jumping down in front of Darkpaw. He gave him a glaring look before spinning around, lifting his tail and stocking off into the den. "Come, Windpaw, it's not befitting for you to be in such company as this," he snorted. Windpaw gave a quick glance to Darkpaw and Mudriver before trotting into the hollow after her brother.

Darkpaw growled and flexed his claws at the display the older tabby had shown. He could cut that tom's ego down to size.

Mudriver nudged his agitated apprentice. "Don't mind him. He just thinks he's above everyone else because he's one of the few cats not related to any rouges. And Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw are just as bad even though their parents are former rouges, dumber than a brain-dead badger though.

"Thicketpaw and…" Darkpaw began but was cut off by a shallow sneer.

"See I told you they let him out," a shrill voice said from behind them. Darkpaw turned around to see a brown and white she-cat, the source of the voice, and a calico tom walking up to them.

The calico snickered. "Wow. What's got into Blackstar's head now? Letting this thing run wild around camp. We shoulda drowned him in the river as soon as he got here, eh, Thicketpaw?" he said in a cracked voice.

"Absolutely. Yech, now the den's gonna stink of rouge," Thicketpaw snorted.

"Don't forget yourselves," Mudriver warned them, "Both your parents were rouges before they came here, remember?"

"Shut up, Mudriver. You're supposed to be silent now," Speckledpaw mumbled in an almost hurt voice as the apprentices dipped their heads and slunk past the two toms and into the den.

"Don't mind then, soon, you will be able to hold each of them down and have them squealing for mercy. They're all gonna respect you soon enough. Now just go find a place to build a nest and ignore then if they try to start trouble," Mudriver told Darkpaw. For such a young cat that clearly seemed to enjoy goofing around, Mudriver sounded very persuasive and almost wise.

Darkpaw nodded and bid his mentor goodnight and watched him meet Thundertail at the camp entrance. As soon as Mudriver was out of sight, Darkpaw quickly ducked behind the stump and lay down. Inside of the den might have been warmer, but he didn't want to deal with the other apprentices. He lulled himself to sleep with thoughts of what Mudriver had said. He would be the strongest and best warrior one day. And they would all be jealous. One day…

Tigerpaw watched silently from the den entrance. His green eyes glowed in the moonlight. "Sleeping outside. Just like a rouge. You sleep tight, Darkstripe, 'cause you'll never be what Mudriver said. You're just another rouge and that's what you'll always be," he whispered to himself. His ears perked up when he heard his sister stir from inside. With a final glare back at Darkpaw, he made his way back to his nest between his sister and Thicketpaw.

**Ok I know I made Tawnypelt a little harsh so don't hate me. I am manipulating a few ShadowClan characters to fit the story like giving Jaggedtooth and Russetfur a son. Also, no apprentices actually from the book are in this story, only the ones I made up. So I hope you enjoy it so far.** **And yes the other clans will come in to play soon.**


	3. Chapter 2

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Thistlefeather-grey and white she-cat. Mother of Tigerpaw and Windpaw and mate of Gingerstripe**

"No! No! Momma! They're after me, momma! They're gonna get me! Momma, help me!" Darkpaw cried in his sleep.

_

"_Get back here, bastard!"_

"_You don't belong here!"_

"_We're gonna get you! Prepare to die you worthless piece of shit!"_

_The other cats were chasing him. Snaketail was leading. They wanted to hurt him. Kill him! They were fast. He couldn't get away!_

"_MOMMA!!!"_

_

"Darkpaw! Darkpaw, wake up!" Mudriver whispered, gently shaking the thrashing kit.

"Huh? Wh-what?" Darkpaw blinked. It was bright. Much too bright for the nursery. Then he remembered the events of the day before as realization flooded into his mind. He was an apprentice now. This grey cat shaking him was his mentor. And none of the others were chasing him and his mother was defiantly not there, though he probably wouldn't have even known if she was there since he had no clue as to what she looked like but he still remembered her scent.

"Come on, it's time for your first day of training," Mudriver said, urging his apprentice up.

Darkpaw looked up. It was barely dawn. He groaned and flopped back down.

"Now, now, none of that, a warrior always has to be ready," Mudriver scolded and took Darkpaw's scruff in his teeth, setting the kit on his paws.

"Ok, ok fine, whatever," Darkpaw hissed, shaking the last bit of drowsiness from his head. "So what are we doing?"

"I'm going to show you the borders since I doubt you remember them from your trip here," the grey warrior explained.

Darkpaw nodded. "Well then let's go," he urged blandly, starting out of the camp.

"That's the spirit," Mudriver said cheerily, leading his apprentice out of the camp.

Darkpaw rolled his eyes. This cat was young and foolish. He had just barely become a warrior a few minutes before taking on Darkpaw and he was the only one who would take him. This was just fucking perfect. Still, this cat didn't seem to want to harm him, actually perhaps help him, so he might as well try. This cat would make him strong and powerful enough to shut those other cats up. He would show them.

"Darkpaw? Darkpaw! Are you paying attention?"

Shit! Mudriver had been talking to him. "Uh, what?" Darkpaw stammered.

"I thought so. Don't worry, I didn't pay much attention my first day either. I told you this is the Thunder Path. Human monsters roll across them and…" Mudriver was cut off as something enormous and loud zoomed down the black path.

Darkpaw hissed and darted into the brush as it roared by, hoping not to be seen. The wind blown in its wake smelled so terrible it made him gag. He looked up and saw the Mudriver appeared completely unfazed by the creature and a little amused by Darkpaw's reaction.

"What the fuck was that?!" Darkpaw snarled, untangling himself from some thorns.

"That was a monster. If you had been paying attention you would have heard me tell you that they don't leave the path and two-legs travel in them," Mudriver explained and pulled a dry piece of leaf from Darkpaw's coat.

Darkpaw looked at this tom in amazement. How could he care so little about his own coat, yet take the time to pull a tiny, insignificant leaf from his short fur.

Mudriver chuckled, "Yes I know that was a bit ironic, but hey, I choose to be dirty and you obviously don't. Wait 'till the gathering, then Thundertail'll probably hold me down and groom me like usual and you get a nice look at my long, silky coat."

"What's a gathering?" Darkpaw asked. Snaketail had mentioned it a few times. She had complained that his being there was keeping her from it, but he had no idea what it was.

Mudriver looked temporarily shocked, but seemed to remember who this kit had been stuck with these past three moons and understood. "A gathering is when all the clans come together at Four Trees and share our news. It is a time of complete peace and no fighting is allowed. It happens every full moon. You will go to one soon, probably, but Blackstar might wanna wait 'till you're a bit older since you became an apprentice a little early," Mudriver explained.

Darkpaw's eyes widened. "There are other clans!" he nearly shrieked. More cats that would hate him and scorn him for reasons he did not know or understand. Something to do with a cat named Darkstripe, his father, but he didn't even know his father. And having to face them all at once even under a peace agreement! He was filled with dread at the thought.

Mudriver simply nodded. "There are four…er…five. ShadowClan, that's us, then ThunderClan, WindClan, RiverClan, and StarClan. StarClan are our warrior ancestors that look down upon us from Silverpelt. The other clans, you actually have to deal with, though."

Darkpaw's head spun. More clans. More cats. And if they were the size of ShadowClan…oh he felt sick. But then another emotion tugged into his mind, distain. What did these cats matter? They were all the same, worthless scum that the rest of ShadowClan were. So there were just more cats for him to show just how strong he was and would be, so be it, all the better. But now there was something else he needed to know. "What's Silverpelt?" he asked.

Now Mudriver really looked shocked. "Did that damn she-cat tell you nothing?! Silverpelt, the sky at night, with all the shiny white dots? They're called stars. That stupid bitch, did she do nothing except trap you in the damn nursery all these moons?" he asked.

"Well, she made me go and get her food. She said it was my fault Ratkit died. She said it should have been me and that if I was going to stay instead of her precious Ratkit I should earn it, but I wasn't good enough sometimes and the bitch would hit me," Darkpaw growled, getting angrier as he went on and flexing his claws at the end. His tail was lashing back and forth and Mudriver knew he had to do something.

"Ok, next border," he said a little more loudly than necessary, but it seemed to snap Darkpaw out of whatever had been going thru his mind.

"Which clan is over there?" Darkpaw asked looking across the path.

"ThunderClan, not exactly our best friends but not a bad bunch. You'll find that none of the clans are real big fans of ShadowClan. But hey, who needs 'em?" Mudriver stated.

Darkpaw found this statement fascinating. The entire clan is outcasts, yet they still could see him as the lowest of the low. An outcast among outcasts, it was pathetic really. Oh, well, it didn't matter to him because none of them mattered to him. He followed Mudriver as he continued explaining the borders and such, showing him the easiest paths to take through the brambles so he wouldn't get injured. It was a useful lesson, but Darkpaw didn't show much interest again until they reached the next neighboring clan's border.

"This is the WindClan border. They run over the moor and hunt rabbits. ShadowClan ran them out once a long time ago, but that was under another previous tyrant. They have since forgiven us…or at least partly. It's doubtful ShadowClan will ever be trusted fully by all the clans," Mudriver spoke more to himself than his apprentice, looking out over the vast stretch of space that was, apparently, WindClan.

"So it that's WindClan, and the other was ThunderClan, will we get to see RiverClan?" Darkpaw asked.

"No, we don't share a direct border with RiverClan, but you will see them when we go to the gathering. They're pretty little devils, capable of swimming effortlessly thanks to the fish they eat," Mudriver explained.

Darkpaw didn't know what a fish was, nor had he ever attempted to swim, but if these fish somehow made that act easier, he would like to obtain it.

"Oy! Darkpaw, let's go!" Mudriver called, heading back into the underbrush as the sun began to fall behind the distant mountains.

"Is that going to be all, then?" he questioned as they headed back to camp.

"For today, yes, but tomorrow you're getting up at the same time and we will start your hunting training since you will be expected to hunt for the clan before feeding yourself," Mudriver said.

Darkpaw growled to himself. As long as he could remember, he had had to feed Snaketail and possibly not even get fed himself, now he was expected to feed all these other cats who disliked him just as much. Well he would do it then. He would become an amazing hunter and show the clan just how much they needed him and how much more he could offer.

"Oh and you'll need to go check on Runningnose as well. An apprentice is responsible for making sure the elders are comfortable. I don't think the others have come back yet so you go and take care of Runningnose and that will earn you a meal since you didn't hunt today," Mudriver called back as he walked over to his sister.

Perfect, just what Darkpaw wanted to be, a servant. He grumbled but was thankful for the fact that Runningnose was the only one he would have to deal with. He made his way to the back of the camp where the elder's den resided and inside laid the lone tom.

"Runningnose? It's me, Darkki-uh…paw I mean. Did you, um, need anything?" Darkpaw called in.

The tom shifted around and looked at him. He smiled. "First day on the job, huh? Well I'll try to make it easy on you. Go and fetch me a piece of fresh-kill from the pile and some poppy seeds from Littlecloud's den and that will be all," the old tom requested.

Darkpaw nodded. The task he had been set to do was not something foreign to him, but he hated it. It reminded him of Snaketail and she filled him with hatred that a kit his age should not feel, but he did and he made no attempts to chase it away. It was his only friend, the only thing that made sense to him.

Runningnose watched Darkpaw scamper off. He had purposefully wanted to see his reaction to the tasks he had been doing for Snaketail. He seemed alright, but there was something not right about him. Something was off. Runningnose just didn't know what it was.

Darkpaw returned shortly carrying a small rabbit. He said nothing as he dropped it in front of the elder and darted off to Littlecloud's den. He was fast. Runningnose saw that, much faster than any other cat his age that Runningnose had seen. His speed was like Scourge, but he wasn't Scourge, certainly not. Not with looks like that. Darkpaw sped back, carrying the seeds on a leaf.

"There's no need to hurry so much. I might be old but I have plenty of time," Runningnose joked. Darkpaw just laid the seeds before the ex-medicine cat. Runningnose sighed. Something was wrong with this kit, very wrong.

Seeing that his tasks were complete, Darkpaw turned to go, but Runningnose cleared his throat. Darkpaw turned around wondering of there was some instruction he had missed. Was he expected to do something else? He faced the elder and dipped his head. "Was there something else, Runningnose?" he asked as politely as he could.

"This is a fine rabbit you brought, apprentice, but I'm not sure I could finish it all. Why don't you share it with me, hm?" Runningnose offered.

Darkpaw's eyes darted up. Was this a trick? Snaketail had said those same words before and it had been a trick which had ended in pain. Darkpaw didn't want pain, not right now. "I'll get you something smaller," he offered.

"No, no, I'm perfectly happy with this rabbit but you wouldn't want it to go to waste now, would you? Besides, you haven't hunted today. You haven't exactly earned your right to eat your own piece of fresh-kill, have you?" the elder interrogated, all the while making Darkpaw more nervous, an emotion he hated and was making him angry.

"Mudriver said…"

"Have you?" Runningnose interrupted. The kit was uncomfortable, but what would that lead to?

"No, I have not earned my right to eat," Darkpaw said finally, barely managing to keep his voice from a hiss.

"That's what I thought, but you don't want to be wasteful, do you?" Runningnose pushed further.

"No, but…"

"Then listen to what your senior says and eat the damn rabbit," Runningnose concluded. Darkpaw's jaw clenched and his claws flexed at this cat's irritating behavior. Runningnose watched closely, wondering if he had managed to push him over the edge. If there would be another violent display. There wasn't.

"Yess, ssir," Darkpaw hissed quietly and stepped over to the older tom, laying in front of him and waiting for his chance at the prey. His body shook as he struggled to remain calm.

Runningnose watched all this while tearing into the soft flesh of the rabbit. His fur prickled slightly as he felt the kit's frozen eyes burn into him. There was another reason he wanted Darkpaw to share this meal. You can tell a lot about a cat by the way they eat, and he was curious beyond compare about Darkpaw's habits. He stopped after barely consuming half the meal. "Alright here you go. Eat it here and bury the bones over there," Runningnose ordered, motioning with his tail to where the bones were to go.

Darkpaw tore into the soft flesh of the carcass mercilessly and skillfully for his young fangs. He ripped off pieces and snapped them into his mouth with quick, measured, and precise bites. Dry blood smeared onto his face and whiskers, but he ignored it. The entire time, his attention was actually on Runningnose. The cat was watching him. Why was everyone watching him? What did they hope to see? He hoped that whatever it was, it made them think long and hard about just what he was and what he could and would to. He was snapped back to reality as he felt his teeth scrape bone.

"Alright, alright, that's it, it's gone!" Runningnose yowled as Darkpaw's jaws now worked the exposed bone while he seemed to be in a trance.

Darkpaw, heavily embarrassed and cursing himself for his stupidity, quickly backed away from the carcass which had now been reduced to mere bloody bones.

"Well at least we know you have an appetite. Go and bury them where I told you and then you are free to do whatever you want," Runningnose told him and he did as he was told. Runningnose watched him as he walked away from the den and out into the camp. "There's a lot of anger in that one. I just hope we can find a way to control it," he whispered to himself then glanced around. "Great I'm the only one in here and now I'm talking to myself. I need some more old coots around here before I go mad," he laughed to himself.

Darkpaw continued away from the Elder's den. _'That wasn't so bad,'_ he thought to himself not completely believing his own thoughts. He jerked his head around fluidly in a circle to crack his neck. Runningnose had not necessarily been the best company, but he hadn't seemed to fear or despise him like the others did. He was looking at his paws while he walked, mostly to avoid the stares and other looks he was receiving from the rest of the clan, even though he could feel the burning eyes on him regardless, and he didn't see the four other apprentices enter the clearing.

Windpaw went off with her mother, Thistlefeather, a she-cat Darkpaw had not met yet. Speckledpaw snuck off somewhere in the direction of Littlecloud's den while Tigerpaw and Thicketpaw hung back by the entrance snickering to each other.

Speckledpaw returned a little while later carrying a wrapped up package in his jaws and grinning mischievously, revealing his slightly crooked white fangs. Tigerpaw smiled approvingly and gestured for the other two to leave the clearing with him.

Darkpaw didn't notice Tigerpaw until he was almost in his jaws. He hissed and rolled out of the way as the older tom's large paws landed right where his head had been. "What do you want?" he snarled not daring relax his stance in case the tabby attacked again.

Tigerpaw's tail lashed back and forth and his terrible smile put Darkpaw on edge. "You're quick. I just wanted to show you something," the tabby said leisurely, relaxing his stance to one that was almost pleasant and inviting.

Darkpaw didn't trust him, though. "What is it?" he asked suspiciously.

Tigerpaw rolled his eyes. "What would be the point of showing you if you knew what it was already?" he said impatiently.

Darkpaw still didn't trust this other cat, but he was curious. Besides, he was quick enough to avoid danger if this was a trap. "Ok fine, let's go," Darkpaw said and followed the tom out of the camp, not seeing Tigerpaw grin when he turned around.

They seemed to have walked quite a way out of the camp and Darkpaw was growing more and more suspicious with every paw step they took. "How much farther?" he questioned as the moon began to threaten to rise, "Are we even supposed to be out here this late?" His question was never answered as two juvenile forms tackled him to the ground and held him there as he struggled. He recognized their scents as Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw and cursed himself for not picking them up sooner, but to his unexercised nose the forest had been overwhelming. Tigerpaw's fangs were almost all he could see of the cat before his eyes adjusted to the sun setting completely.

The eldest apprentice smiled down at the younger cat and dropped a package in front of his writhing form. "Do you know what that is, kit?" he spat.

Darkpaw's mouth was covered by Speckledpaw's paw so he simply shook his head, scowling up at his captor. Tigerpaw unwrapped the package and Darkpaw nearly gagged at the stench that came off it.

Tigerpaw fanned it lazily with his tail. "Phew, nasty. This, little kit, is mouse-bile. It's great for getting rid of ticks on elder's but the taste is also good for teaching naughty little assholes a lesson. Now, normally you don't want to get this stuff in your mouth, but your case is special," the tabby said with his horrible smile returning to his face.

Darkpaw struggled again. The weight of the two older cats on his body was crushing him and his muscles were screaming protest at his movements. What did this cat mean 'teach him a lesson'? What had he done wrong? He eventually lost his struggle again as Thicketpaw pinned his hips down and Speckledpaw held his upper body in something similar to a crushing hug with a paw still over Darkpaw's mouth and the other tightly holding his chest so he sat in the upright position.

"Hold still you little bastard. You're only making it harder on yourself," Tigerpaw ordered, "Now open wide," he sang and took the bile in his paws.

Darkpaw tried to turn his head away as Speckledpaw's paw fell from in front of his mouth to trying to hold it open. Speckledpaw held his mouth open by grabbing his nose and pulling it upwards while Darkpaw tried desperately to snap his jaws around the invading appendage. Another paw hooked his bottom jaw and something disgusting was shoved into his mouth. The paws now worked in reverse, trying to force his jaws shut as the bile was squeezed from the moss and threatened to go down his throat. He shook his head and tried to gag feeling angry and completely humiliated as the other toms held his mouth shut and Thicketpaw pinned his body down. He could feel himself either getting ready to vomit or swallow when suddenly all the weight on his body was released in a sudden movement. He rolled over and vomited the moss and rabbit up, coughing and sputtering as a loud, angry yowl rang out.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU STUPID PIECES OF SHIT DOING?!!!" Blackstar roared so loud and so fierce that the older apprentices felt they might soil themselves.

"W-we were…we were just playing," Tigerpaw squeaked sounding more like a terrified kit than Darkpaw could ever have managed. A blow slammed down onto the tabby's head and he felt his nose begin to bleed as his face hit the hard dirt.

"CUT YOUR SHIT, TIGERPAW!!!" Blackstar shouted and the apprentice didn't dare get up.

Speckledpaw looked around before trying to run away, but jaws clamped harshly on his tail and dragged him to the ground, slamming him onto his back with a thud that made him choke and gasp for air. A heavy black paw was placed on his chest so he heaved even more.

"Where do you think you're going, you pathetic little freak," Blackstar hissed.

"B-Blackstar, it…it wasn't us…I mean it wasn't our ide-OUCH!" Thicketpaw cried as unsheathed claws smacked her cheek.

"You partook in this, didn't you?! You helped! You're just as guilty as they are you damned bitch!" her leader roared and she felt like she was shrinking and ended up lying on the ground at his paws whimpering pathetically as some blood trickled down her cheek.

"Ok, Blackstar, it's late, let's take them back to camp before we do anything else," Littlecloud said calmly as he emerged from the bushes with Mudriver.

"Darkpaw! Are you ok?" the grey warrior asked rushing over to his apprentice.

Darkpaw, still a bit shaky from throwing up, just nodded.

Mudriver looked at the pile of drying vomit and scowled at the other apprentices. "Tigerpaw, what the hell is your fucking problem?! You shoved mouse-bile down his throat? You stupid dick-wad," he hissed.

"You did WHAT?!" Blackstar shouted kicking the tabby apprentice onto his back, making him groan in pain.

"Come on, Blackstar. You guys, come back to camp with us and don't even think about trying to run off…Speckledpaw," Littlecloud growled warningly as Speckledpaw glanced around again.

The three adults and four apprentices walked back into the camp as the moon was rising higher into the sky.

"Stay here," Blackstar growled to the three oldest apprentices and whispered something to Littlecloud. The small cat nodded and trotted off as Blackstar sat, glaring at the three juveniles before him. "Mudriver you can go back to sleep, and Darkpaw, go wait in Littlecloud's den and see if he can do anything to help you out with that taste," Blackstar said in a much calmer voice than he had had before but was still slick with anger.

Mudriver nodded and flicked his tail in a goodnight to his charge and a glare to his former den-mates as he made his way back to the warrior's den.

Darkpaw nodded a goodnight to him and walked over to the medicine cat's den, smacking his jaws at the vile taste plaguing his tongue. Littlecloud left his den carrying three small packages like the one Tigerpaw had had. A small breeze that blew its scent his way told Darkpaw it was the same thing. He grinned slightly at the misfortune that was soon to fall upon his den-mates. He walked into the large, sweet-smelling den and looked around. Herbs covered nearly every available surface and it amazed Darkpaw that each one of these could be used for something different that Littlecloud knew by heart.

Windpaw walked sleepily out of the apprentice's den. She looked in confusion as Blackstar shouted something at her brother and the other apprentices on the other side of the clearing away from the other dens. She walked over, curious as to what was happening.

"I said, PUT THE SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH!" Blackstar yelled at the juveniles before him who stood trembling and looking down at the wads of moss at their paws. The power and authority Blackstar emulated in his last statement forced the kits to take the vile stuff in their mouths.

"AUGH!!!" Speckledpaw shouted and spat it back out but Blackstar slammed it back into his mouth and almost down his throat with one hard swipe. Thicketpaw whimpered and looked ready to cry and even Tigerpaw looked completely defeated.

"Blackstar? What's going on?" the small white she-cat asked, approaching her comrades and mentor.

"Nothing of your concern, Windpaw. Now go on back to your den and go to sleep," he ordered gently.

Windpaw looked at the pained expression on her brother's face. She wanted to help him, but it wasn't worth risking her leader's wrath. She just dipped her head respectfully and headed back to her den.

Blackstar watched her go before rounding his blazing eyes back on the youngsters. They whimpered in fear. "How's it taste, huh? Good enough for you? It was good enough for Darkpaw so it's just barely good enough for your sorry asses I guess. Now you listen, ALL of you. If any of you pull ANY shit like that again, I'll kick you out and MAYBE let you come back a week later. You wanna act like stupid rouges you can BE stupid rouges. I don't give a shit. This clan doesn't need more idiots than it already has. I don't know what your beef is with Darkpaw, but GET THE FUCK OVER IT!!!" the leader shouted in each apprentice's face making them shake even harder. "Do you understand what I just told you? DO YOU?!" he shouted again. They closed their eyes and nodded. "Good, now you can stay out here 'till dawn, then you can spit that shit out and go with your mentors to get some new bile for Littlecloud since you wasted four whole damn wads. Any questions?" he hissed dangerously.

Thicketpaw fought away a gulp and raised her tail, signifying she had something to say.

"Ok, Thicketpaw, spit it out," Blackstar ordered and she gratefully complied but threw up in the process, the sight of which nearly pushed the toms over the edge.

"Do…you…mean…th-that we are to…keep this in our mouths t-till…d-dawn?" she gasped, trying to regain her breath from vomiting.

"Yes, now put it back in and sit here until dawn. Oh, and if any of you decide to be clever and spit it out before dawn, you know I'll find out and you WILL be punished severely," Blackstar hissed before retreating to his den.

The apprentices looked at each other in pure misery, none daring to test Blackstar's warning.

'_Fucking bastard. This is all HIS fault. What is Blackstar thinking? Letting that…that…THING run loose around the clan and…DEFENDING him!!! If I were leader that thing would have been dead a long time ago. Damn bastard, I'll get you for this,' _Tigerpaw thought darkly. This punishment was a new level of humiliation made worse only by the fact that Littlecloud not only had helped the rouge but had been ordered not to help the rest of them. _'Darkstripe.'_

Darkpaw curled up behind his stump. He had yet to gather any form of bedding, but he was too tired to do anything about it now. He flopped down with his eyes closed. He smacked his lips. Littlecloud had done a good job. He had washed most of the juices out of Darkpaw's mouth, which had helped with the taste greatly, and what he couldn't get he smothered in good tasting herbs that almost completely killed all traces of the taste.

'Make sure you get really fresh prey and let the blood wash around in your mouth for a bit. That should make the last of the taste go away in a few days,' Littlecloud had told him and he was going to do just that. Mudriver was going to teach him to hunt tomorrow and he was determined to catch more prey than any apprentice his age ever had. Of course, there hadn't really been many apprentices his age, but that wasn't the point. The point was to prove himself and he intended to do that perhaps with some added bravado. And he was DEFINATLY going to make those others pay. Yes Blackstar was punishing them already, but he was going to get them HIS way…just as soon as he had enough skills to realize what HIS way was.

Deciding these were thoughts for when he _wasn't _exhausted, Darkpaw allowed himself to slowly fall into his escape of sleep where monsters and demons chased him until the sun rose and blinded him and chased them away. And sure enough the darkness came dragging him into oblivion. In his short life he had become accustomed to the ways of this other world that held only him and his nightmares. No dreams, no hopes, no wishes, just the dark. The dark only he could get into and this in its own made it his only safe place and he accepted it and allowed it to pull him into sweet oblivion, encasing him so tightly it suffocated him and made him feel the safest he had ever felt.

**Aww. Ok I just wanted to let you guys know, yes Mudriver has bad grammar sometimes and he also calls Snaketail 'Snaketongue' sometimes. Ok toodles.**


	4. Chapter 3

"Good job. If there'd been a rabbit there he'd be dead now," Mudriver praised his apprentice.

Darkpaw didn't let it be seen but he felt slight pride in himself. They hadn't been out here very long and he was already picking up hunting fast. Soon he'd be able to show what he was worth. Mudriver was a very good teacher despite his youth.

"When do I finally get to go hunting?" he asked his mentor.

Mudriver chuckled at his eager apprentice. "When you learn to hunt something besides rabbits and my tail, now let me show you how to sneak up on a mouse."

Darkpaw watched intently as the grey warrior dropped into a new crouch and moved his paws swiftly over the ground and sprang upon an imaginary mouse.

"Now you try," he said straightening up. He began to flick his fluffy tail around in an impersonation of a mouse.

Darkpaw lowered his body to the ground, trying to place every muscle on every bone in the exact same way the older tom had. He crawled across the clearing swiftly and sprang at his target. When Mudriver began to move his tail out of the way, Darkpaw twisted in the air and clamped his jaws around the grey prey. He had it. He had it! It was his! Soon it would be the others too.

'Yes,' he sighed at the thought of having Tigerpaw and the others in his grip just as helpless as the prey in his jaws, having him screeching and whining to be released but not having it granted. He imagined closing his jaws around the tabby's flesh…

A loud yowl tore Darkpaw from his fantasy. Long grey fur filled his mouth and something…something…strange. A strange tasting liquid was running into his mouth. It tasted oddly familiar yet different in a way. His eyes grew wide as he realized what the warm substance was. _BLOOD! Mudriver's blood!_ He backed away quickly, completely horrified. He watched Mudriver examine his tail, slowly leaking the red stain into his fur. Darkpaw backed away and waited for the anger to come and the blows to rain down on him. Mudriver looked back up at him and began to approach. Darkpaw stiffened, this was it. This big tom was going to tear him limb from limb. He didn't back away, didn't cower. If this was going to happen, it would happen. He waited for the first hit…but it never came.

"Nice job, kid! Hurt like a bitch, but I've never seen anyone pull off what you just did. I think we'll stop using my tail as target practice though, eh? With jaws like yours it'll be significantly smaller by the time we're done. Perfect stance and everything, though, you're a quick learner," the warrior said with a smile, nudging his apprentice lightly with his paw.

Darkpaw was shocked. Hadn't what he'd done been bad? He had made his mentor bleed. When he had done that to Snaketail she had nearly shredded him and she had deserved it!

Mudriver seemed to sense his apprentice's confusion. "Hey, 'ts ok. It was a accident, you didn't mean to. That was really impressive," he said in a calming voice, trying to put Darkpaw at ease.

"B-but when I did that to Snaketail…" Darkpaw started but was stopped when he felt the older toms nose touching his shoulder lightly.

"I'm not Snaketail. You didn't do anything wrong and that bitch had no idea what she was talking about," the grey male said after pulling back again. "Now do you wanna learn how to catch a bird or not?" he asked suddenly full of life again.

Darkpaw nodded dumbly, still confused but he forced himself to shake it off.

"Great, let's go," Mudriver chirped and lead the way into the brush. "I think this lesson will go better as a watch-and-learn type exercise since you seem to be very good at that. Now watch closely because this goes quick." Mudriver dropped into another crouch and slipped into the tall grass, not making a noise.

Darkpaw watched as he placed his paws in specific, measured paces before springing out and ripping open a blackbird just as silently. The small tabby's jaw dropped as he approached. He sniffed the heap of blood and feathers and a message registered in his mind. _Young, male, mated before but not recently, free of diseases, no parasites, life recently ended. _Darkpaw shook his head. How did he know all that from just one smell? He was about to ask his mentor if it was normal, but he was cut off.

"Hm…male…not too old I don't think, judging by his size…I don't think I smell any illness…uh parasites seem to be absent…alright let's bury him and come back later. It's your turn," Mudriver said after a series of sniffs and prodding at the bird.

Darkpaw was confused. How had he gotten more information in one smell than this adult had gotten in a full examination?

"Hey, Earth to Darkpaw. Can you smell any prey?" Mudriver asked, breaking Darkpaw's chain of thought.

"Uh…" Darkpaw closed his eyes and sniffed. The forest came alive before his closed eyes. Dark green blobs in the shapes of trees and other plants surrounded him, varying in shade. He noticed that where the dead grass to his left was supposed to be was a very light, almost yellowed color while the sapling to his right was a bright and brilliant green. The sky was black and there was a black shape on the ground where the blackbird lay at his paws among some brown shapes that proved to be bugs. He focused his ears for the sound of a mouse or something and he heard the faintest of rustles. He turned his head in its direction and saw, amongst the sea of green, a bright orange shape scurrying about. He opened his eyes and flinched slightly as the sunlight brightened the real world where the previous one had been dark besides the colors from the living things around him.

"This way," he hissed and began to stalk thru the grass making almost no noise. A brown form came into view. It moved suddenly and Darkpaw stopped. The form relaxed once again and continued to sniff and scratch at the ground around it. Its tail held high. Darkpaw was now close enough to get a better smell of the little animal. Again a message flashed in his mind. _Adult, female, mated and gave birth previously, healthy, very much alive, species unknown but scent familiar. _Darkpaw didn't question the message this time and simply took its information. He got a little closer before springing up and landing on the creatures back, instinctively biting its neck and ending its life, closing his eyes while he did so. He inhaled as his nose was buried in the reddish-brown fur. The same message flashed in his mind but this time stating that the creature was recently dead. The orange that had represented this animal's life faded to black to match the ground almost immediately. He opened his eyes and watched his mentor approach, savoring his second taste of blood for the day.

"You're just full of surprises ain't cha," he said as he saw the squirrel at his apprentice's paws. "I never told you how to catch a squirrel, but from the way you handled it and found it so easily, you'd think you'd been doing this for years."

Darkpaw looked down at his first kill. A squirrel. So that's what this thing was. Oh well, it was just prey now. He had never killed anything before, but he hadn't minded it. In fact, he sort of enjoyed it, stealing the creature's life away while it hadn't even expected him. It had died so easily too. It made him feel…powerful. He had a feeling he would enjoy hunting.

"I'll be honest, I wasn't expecting you to succeed your first try," Mudriver admitted.

"Well, proved you wrong then didn't I," Darkpaw said looking his mentor in the eyes.

"Yes you did and, as much as I adore being proven wrong, it's time we started heading back to camp so pick up your prize and let's go. Tomorrow we'll work on other prey and once you've gotten the basics of that, we can go on to combat," Mudriver said. At first the kit's mood swings had confused him, but he had started growing used to them, not wanting to get into a conflict. Despite his looks and slightly odd personality, he didn't seem that bad and his performance today seemed to promise a good future for him at least in hunting.

Darkpaw followed his mentor's instructions and picked up the squirrel before following the bushy tail back to where they had left the blackbird. He noticed the dried, brown blood now caked onto the tom's fur and stared at it in fascination. As a test, he closed his eyes and sniffed. The tom's form came in at an orangeish-red color, similar to the squirrel's. He focused on the swaying tail and saw a few streaks on it that were fading into black interfering with the living orange color from shining thru, but it was there.

'_Interesting,' _Darkpaw thought opening his eyes, _'the blood is alive, but once it leaves the body, it starts to die.'_

Mudriver picked up the bird and lead the way back to camp, thoughts of what his apprentice was accomplishing so quickly plaguing his usually care-free mind. _'He's a strange one, alright. He looked like he was gonna have a heart-attack when he made me bleed but he liked it so much when he killed that squirrel. I can see where he would be proud of himself, but that's such a drastic change. How did he find that squirrel so fast anyway? And the way he caught it, it took me like ten tries before I got my first squirrel and he's just a kit! Either I'm pathetic or he's amazing and since I didn't do any worse than any other apprentice when it came to hunting, I'm gonna go with the latter. But how the fuck did he do it?! He was all cooped in the nursery except to run out and get Snaketongue her damn food, totally unpracticed in tracking, and now suddenly he's like a fucking king of hunting. Maybe I'm looking too deep into this. Maybe it was just a fluke…but it didn't seem that way. StarClan this is so confusing, I'll have to talk to Thundertail about this. She should be able to help." _

Right when he decided this, the camp entrance came into view. He walked thru and dropped his kill on the pile followed by his apprentice. He noticed several cats looking at the two of them and murmuring to each other.

"What the hell are they going on about?" he wondered but didn't have much time to dwell on it as Thundertail was rushing up to them suddenly.

"Come on, go!" she hissed nudging the toms back out of the camp.

"Thundertail what's going-?"

"Shh! We'll talk in a minute," Thundertail interrupted her brother and led the pair back to the dead spot under the tree. She stopped and turned to them.

"Now will you tell us what's-?"

"What happened?!" Thundertail cut off her brother again.

"What are you talking about?" Mudriver asked.

"Your tail! What happened to it?" Thundertail demanded.

"Oh this? It's nothing I just, uh…" Mudriver glanced down at the silver tabby next to him.

Darkpaw's icy eyes burned into his mentor's. He had been forgiving, but he didn't know what the reactions of the she-cat would be. She seemed very close to her brother and he had harmed him.

"I snagged it on some thorns. Damn tangles get in the way," Mudriver finished sweeping his matted tail over his paws.

Thundertail knew he was lying. The mats in his fur had proved one thing: the thorns would not catch his skin. He would have to be directly injured by something for that damage to happen. She knew he would not tell her what had really happened, but his glance down at the kit led her to believe it had something to do with him but her brother was trying to protect him. The last thing this kit needed was for it to be found out that he had caused _another_ injury resulting in blood. "Well you picked a fine day to go and get yourself even _filthier_, though I didn't think it was possible. Tonight's the gathering. And _we're _going, as _warriors_, for the first time and you're going to show up like that? Tsk, I've got my work cut out for me," she sighed and began to advance on her brother.

"Hey! No, no I can handle it myself! Thundertail! I mean it! Back off!" Mudriver stammered, backing away from his sister. She just giggled and lept on him, pinning him on his stomach and began working her tongue thru his many knots. "Darkpaw, help me!" he cried.

Darkpaw, having realized that no pain was to be inflicted upon him, had begun experimenting with his new vision, looking at the amount of life in the things in the clearing. While the tree wasn't the healthiest, it was in better shape than the grass. Only a few bugs wandered about his paws. He saw a small bird up in the higher branches of the tree and had been watching it hop from twig to twig apparently unable to decide which supported him and his task the best. He had been watching this display when the grey juvenile-adult had called out. He opened his eyes looked over at his mentor being groomed viciously by his sister. He had seen the "sharing tongues" ritual very few times in his short life, but he couldn't remember it ever being quite this…vigorous.

"C'mon little buddy, help me out here!" Mudriver yowled again.

Darkpaw just sat where he was and watched. "You promised that when the gathering came I would get to see your "long, silky coat". Well here's the gathering, I want to see your "long, silky coat" already," he responded enjoying the expression on his mentors face as Thundertail practically fell over laughing.

"You sure got yourself a smart apprentice there, brother. I like him," Thundertail laughed continuing to groom her brother. Mudriver had been shocked into silence and no longer fought her.

_

After half an hour of the most intense grooming session Darkpaw had ever seen (not that he had seen many) Thundertail finally stepped away from her brother. Darkpaw was shocked by the transformation. His mentor's fur was much longer than it had looked before. The brownish tint was completely gone and the silver in his coat was so shiny it was almost blinding. His tail was perfect, like a silver waterfall and all his longer fur was out of his face, making his bright yellow eyes and shiny black nose stand out even more. His ears apparently had small black tuffs of fur sticking up on the tips. The fur on his chest was fluffy and prominent giving him a more refined look.

Darkpaw could hardly believe this was the same cat he had seen prior. He was sure Thundertail had buried his mentor and pulled this cat up instead. But upon sniffing the air, he discovered that this was indeed his mentor still.

"Look at him. He doesn't even recognize me," Mudriver scoffed, jerking his head at Darkpaw who was still staring.

Mudriver walked over to a small puddle at the edge of the clearing and looked at his reflection. "Oh damnit, Thundertail! What have I told you about making me look like a damn pussy?" Mudriver complained. He stepped back and shook himself, hardly affecting the hairdo as it fell silkily back into place. He began to rub his head with his paw trying to get some of his old look back but failing.

"You look better this way. You're just lucky I didn't get to you before our warrior ceremony. And if you fuck it up, I'll kill you," Thundertail growled, her tongue a little dry from her previous actions but not allowing it to affect her speech.

Darkpaw watched the two siblings bicker. He wanted to know what a gathering was like. From the way the two were acting it seemed very important, but at the same time he was glad he was staying behind at the camp. He didn't want to deal with the other clans just yet, maybe once he was bigger and stronger but not yet. Mudriver had stopped trying to sabotage his look but was still mumbling something about "a whole moon of planning just to get it ruined" and Thundertail was arguing how he looked more "handsome" and "smarter" and "less rougeish". Darkpaw doubted the last part was a word but decided that now was not the time to argue. He didn't even know what "rougeish" was supposed to look like, but seeing as he wasn't under Thundertail's vicious tongue, he assumed that he was not it and Mudriver was.

The argument finally stopped with Thundertail victorious and Mudriver being sat on by his sister looking annoyed but not exactly angry. He seemed to have been expecting it. Thundertail climbed off her brother purring loudly.

"You listen up, kid, never let a she-cat anywhere near you, understand? They're nothing but trouble," Mudriver whispered to Darkpaw.

"Oh shut up. Don't listen to a word my brother tells you, he's got mouse dung for brains," Thundertail laughed.

"Hey don't tell my apprentice that! He respects me. Unlike _some_, hint hint, wink wink, cough cough, Thundertail," Mudriver grumbled.

"Oh get over yourself you overgrown kit!" Thundertail laughed again.

"Hmph, see what I mean?" Mudriver snorted.

"Let's go. We'll be late," Thundertail said rolling her eyes and leading the way back to the camp.

The cats watched them enter, their gaze passing quickly over Thundertail, then to Mudriver, and finally resting on Darkpaw. Darkpaw found himself looking forward to the gathering even though he wasn't going. All the apprentices and most of the warriors would be gone for most of the night and he would finally get some peace. He had spent his previous gatherings in the company of Snaketail, but tonight she would be gone. He would have peace and silence, things he had never really known before.

The clan began to gather around Blackstar and Littlecloud and they soon began to filter through the entrance/exit of the camp in a disorganized/organized mass. He saw Mudriver and Thundertail nod a farewell to him, which he returned, before exiting the camp side by side. The four other apprentices exited last. Darkpaw caught a sneer on Tigerpaw's face as he left, his sister to his right and Thicketpaw to his left. Speckledpaw was slightly behind the group walking a little to Windpaw's right with his head down but never getting too close to the white female. Darkpaw had noticed Tigerpaw was fiercely protective of his sister and always had Thicketpaw close by him while Speckledpaw seemed to be on the edge, not able to stay near either female for very long and simply trailing Tigerpaw. This didn't really matter, except to make Darkpaw think of Tigerpaw as even more of an arrogant jerk, but he still noticed it.

Finally most of the clan was gone save four or five warriors who had stayed behind plus Runningnose who was dozing contently in the elders' den. Darkpaw hadn't realized until just now how tired his body was. His small, barely developed muscles were not used to the strain he had placed on them today since he had never played with another kit before or stalked anything. He was a little sore and his paws were tired from being on them all day. Ignoring the looks from the remaining warriors, Darkpaw walked over to the fresh-kill pile and saw the squirrel he had caught earlier untouched. It didn't bother him. He picked it up and took it over behind "his" stump.

Remembering Littlecloud's instructions, he allowed the sweet blood to wash over his tongue and rest in his mouth for a little bit before swallowing. When the squirrel had been reduced to mere bones he looked at them. He could tell where each part of the rodent had been, its legs, head, stomach, and soft neck that he had broken. He reached with his paw and gently touched the fine break. Something tempted him to want to carry around the bones as a trophy, but he decided against it. He didn't need to draw even more attention to himself.

He dug a shallow hole and dumped the remains in, but looked at them again before covering them with dirt. He glanced around and saw that he was not being watched so he reached in and snapped off one of the delicate ribs before quickly burying his carcass.

He took the single bone back to his place behind the stump and began to lick it even cleaner, getting rid of much of the staining blood. He looked at the base of the stump and saw a hole, ever so small, leading partway under it. Darkpaw gently slid his treasure into the hole and tested it, making sure he could still get it out. Once satisfied, he examined his hiding spot. He stood up and looked at it from different angles, ensuring no one could accidentally come upon it. It was still a little visible to him but that was because he was much smaller than the others and he already knew it was there, but, wanting to be especially safe, he decided it was time he made a nest.

He trotted to the edge of the camp, looking for some soft form of bedding material. A quick glance from the corner of his eye showed movement in the warriors' den. He turned his head slightly more in its direction and pretended to be examining a fern growing by him but instead took a deep whiff and closed his eyes. Four orange forms moved around behind a barrier of green while one lay on the ground. _All awake, healthy, adult, occasional flea or tick, two male, three female, two female and one male previously mated while final male has no mate, two females have had kits, one litter each, one containing two kits while other contained one, male father of single, all slightly on edge about something. _The message both pleased and angered Darkpaw. He knew he was the cause of their distress and that made him glad that he, at such a young age, could reduce warriors to waiting until he fell asleep to relax, and angered him in the fact that they really had nothing to fear from him if they would just calm down and leave him alone.

He sighed. He would show them one day. He gathered his bedding of choice and made a slightly sloppy but sufficient nest in front of his hiding place, but he designed it so that it didn't look like he was trying to conceal anything and if he laid a certain way he could access his treasure at any time in secrecy.

Now really exhausted, he flopped down onto his new nest. It was the softest thing he had ever felt. It drew up a memory of something else soft, and warm, but it had held the scent of life while his new nest had the scent of dying. He snuggled into his nest but knew it wouldn't cradle him back. Something had, once, but he could hardly remember it. He reached a paw into his hiding place and touched his treasure. He felt calmed slightly and retracted his paw to keep his place a secret. He took a deep breath and relaxed.

He was almost asleep when he sensed the other being coming towards him. His fur prickled but he didn't move. He kept his breathing steady. The figure's scent hit him. _Male, no mate, adult, frightened. _The tom leaned down ever so carefully and watched him, looking for any signs of alertness. Seeing none, Darkpaw sensed him gesture to the others with his tail before quickly making his way back to the group. It was safe. The monster was asleep.

Darkpaw suddenly felt a new pain. It was so different it scared him for a moment while making him want to scream in pain. No, not pain, a new feeling, emptiness, loneliness, agony. It hurt! It hurt so badly! It was like a sharper than sharp blow to his chest but no blow had been delivered. No, no blow had ever felt like this, it was something else. It centered around his heart, making him able to feel it beat. It beat harder against his ribs and made his breathing faster. His head began to hurt. All over began to hurt. He didn't know why he felt this way. He wanted to scream and cry and be held. He had never been held, but instinct told him that was what he wanted. His body trembled. It hurt so much! He hadn't done anything wrong! Oh how it hurt! It wouldn't stop. He reached into his hiding place and pulled out his treasure. He held it close to his pounding chest in the hope that it would somehow make it slow down and stop hurting. It did slow down, but it didn't stop hurting. He held it tighter until his muscles screamed in protest and he released it. His breath came out as choking sobs and he licked the bone a few more times before replacing it back in its spot.

Darkpaw curled up into an even tighter ball. He felt terrified. The pain he had just felt was so different, so immense. He had never felt anything like it. It had made him feel so weak. No one could ever know he had felt that, ever. He would have to deaden himself to that pain, to everything just to make sure it couldn't come back.

Finally stopping his body from shaking, Darkpaw slipped into his dreams where his nest held him and cradled him before turning to thorns and ripping at his fur and skin playing on his new pain. And he was alone, all alone, but it was better that way, it meant no one could see what he had been just a little while ago and no one could make it happen again. Alone. All alone…

**Ok I think this is my most depressing chapter so far. It actually made me sad while I was writing it. T.T Well I hope you enjoyed it. Reviews make Darkpaw happy!**


	5. Chapter 4

**Cat's met in this chapter:**

**Dawnpaw: grey, long-haired she-cat. RiverClan apprentice and best friend of Nightpaw. Mentored by Spottedlegs(not mentioned in this chapter).**

**Nightpaw: black she-cat. RiverClan apprentice and best friend of Dawnpaw. Mentored by Mistyfoot(not mine of course).**

ShadowClan entered the clearing so silently the other two clans (ThunderClan and WindClan) were almost startled when they were finally able to discern the dark cats from the shadows of the underbrush. Blackstar came at the head followed by Littlecloud and the sea of warriors tailed by Thundertail Mudriver and the remaining apprentices minus Darkpaw. Firestar and Tallstar nodded their greeting as Blackstar joined them at the base of the great rock.

"Hey, Thundertail, come over here I wanna talk to you," Mudriver whispered to his sister. She gave him a confused look but followed him to a more secluded part of the clearing.

"What is it?" she asked once they had arrived and Mudriver sat down.

"It's about Darkpaw. He hasn't done anything wrong there's just something strange about him that I don't get," he explained seeing his sister's worried expression.

"What do you mean?" Thundertail knew there was something odd about the young apprentice, but she didn't see any cause for worry, all things considered.

"Well, you know how I started teaching him to hunt today? He sniffed out a squirrel and caught it completely on his own!"

"So you're a good teacher, what's the big deal?"

"The big deal is I never taught him that. I was seeing what he could do, I mean I taught him how to stalk a bird, mouse, and rabbit, but that's it! I never even taught him how to track down prey and you'd think his nose wouldn't be that good since he's hardly left the nursery in moons." Mudriver's voice was getting louder so that it was a wonder no one could hear him whispering yet.

"Oh, that is strange. Have you talked to Littlecloud or Blackstar about it yet? Maybe it was just a fluke," Thundertail suggested, though from the way her brother was talking it seemed to be more than that.

"No I haven't had a chance to, and plus I wanted to talk to you about it first since Darkpaw doesn't seem to like too much attention at once and I know you won't go bugging him. But I don't think it was a fluke. It was too precise and the strangest part was he seemed to like it."

"So he was proud of himself. You liked it too."

"No it was different. I mean he REALLY liked it. I've never seen him so happy and it was such a mood change. When he made me…I mean _saw _me bleed, I thought he was going to have a heart attack, but when he got that squirrel. I don't even think he knew what a squirrel was before I told him. It's just so-"

"Hey guys!" Mudriver was interrupted by a cheery young voice running up to them. He turned to see a small, grey long-haired she-cat trotting up to them.

"Oh hey, Dawnpaw! When did you get here?" Mudriver said to the RiverClan apprentice, quickly putting on a smile.

"I just got here. How have you guys been and…why are you way over here and not with the other apprentices?" Dawnpaw asked looking around then suddenly she gasped. "ARE YOU GUYS WARRIORS NOW?!" she cried jumping up with excitement.

"Yep, two days ago we completed our training 'n got our official warrior names," Mudriver boasted.

"Oh my gosh! Nightpaw's not going to believe this. NIGHTPAW C'MERE!" the eager she-cat cried. A slightly older black she-cat looked up from where she was sitting with a group of adults and walked over.

"What is it, Dawnpaw?" she asked, her personality greatly contradicting that of her grey friend.

"Tell her tell her tell her!" Dawnpaw said again and again jumping up and down.

"My brother and I are now official ShadowClan warriors," Thundertail said with a smile.

"Yeah and I already have a-mph!" Mudriver was silenced by a swipe to the back of his head by his sister.

"Are you crazy?! We don't need to draw attention to him just yet, the other clans don't even know we have him with us, remember?" Thundertail hissed quietly to her brother.

"…a new…name! Yeah that's right. I already have a new name. I am now Mudriver, the greatest warrior in all of ShadowClan!" the grey tom covered striking a pose.

"Oh shut up, Mudriver, I'm a better warrior than you," Thundertail groaned rolling her eyes.

"Then what's your name, Thunder…uhm…" Dawnpaw trailed off not knowing what to say.

"I bet it's Thundertail," Nightpaw said referring to the other she-cat's crooked yellow tail.

"Right you are, Nightpaw. Wow you should be called Brightpaw," Thundertail joked earning a smile from the other two she-cats and a groan from her brother whom she swiftly kicked in the leg earning a yelp from the silver cat.

"I'm going to be a warrior soon, too, and Dawnpaw here's not far behind…hey where did Dawnpaw go?" Nightpaw asked noticing the place beside her empty.

"She's over there talking to Tigerpaw and Windpaw," Mudriver said licking his injured leg. "You know I thought we were supposed to be peaceful at gatherings," he groaned.

"There is nothing that says you have to be peaceful to your annoying brother, just the other clans," Thundertail countered with a sniff making Nightpaw smirk.

"We should probably find a spot, it looks like the gathering is about to start," Nightpaw said as the leaders jumped to the top of the great rock. The siblings nodded and followed the RiverClan apprentice to a spot a little closer.

Not much seemed to be happening with the other clans. Blackstar mentioned the turning of Mudriver and Thundertail into warriors. Once again there was no mention of the silver tabby kit that had come moons ago, was now an apprentice at only four moons old to a warrior who had just barely finished his training and had failed miserably at his vow of silence.

As far as the other clans knew, Darkstripe had never sired anyone or even had a mate. Outside of ShadowClan, Darkpaw did not exist. Blackstar had even told the others in the clan to not mention him in any way or they would be punished. Exactly how, he did not know so had left to their imagination what he was capable of being a former rouge. He was not looking forward to the time when he would finally have to bring the young kit into the light and explain him to the other clans. ThunderClan might not be so hard to sway to his side, but the other two clans might be a bit less forgiving. He was almost tempted to keep the kit a secret, but knowing ShadowClan's history, something would happen so that he would be discovered somehow and having the other clans dig him out would be even worse. No the time would come, just not yet.

Littlecloud did not approve of the leader's procrastination, but he understood it. ShadowClan was already unpopular. Darkstripe's son was very unlikely to help in the matter. This gave ShadowClan both Tigerstar's daughter and Darkstripe's look-alike son. Regardless of how either of the grown cats felt on the matter, though, Darkpaw had to come to a gathering before he could ever become a warrior and then they would have no choice but to explain. Mudriver couldn't mentor him forever. That was going to be another tough thing to explain, Mudriver had been a warrior for a grand total of about ten minutes before he had become a mentor after breaking his vow of silence until after mid-day as well as his sister. Nothing about Darkpaw had been normal. He technically already possessed a warrior name, the suffix had just been added for show, he was just brought to the clan and left, he was made an apprentice and four moons to Mudriver (enough said). It was clear why Blackstar was hesitant to mention him. Littlecloud hadn't ever even dared try to bring him up to the other medicine cats.

The gathering ended and each clan said their goodbyes and went their separate ways. Littlecloud trotted up beside his leader as they made their way back to their camp.

"Have you decided when you're going to tell them?" Littlecloud whispered.

"Actually I was thinking I might just bring him to a gathering once he's a few moons older and just wing it from there," Blackstar admitted keeping his voice low so the others didn't hear.

"Typical. You know you might want to say something to soften the blow a bit," Littlecloud suggested.

"Like what? 'Hey everybody just so you know Darkstripe's son has been living with us for several moons now, we made him an apprentice two moons early because he was too aggressive for the nursery but don't worry, once you get past that he has a great personality, even though everyone hates and/or fears him.' Fuck Littlecloud, there is no way to make the blow softer! It'll be like hitting a kit's head before throwing them in the lake no matter how you put it," Blackstar hissed back.

"Oh well excuse me for trying to help. You're the one that got yourself into this damn situation," Littlecloud snapped.

"Oh yeah? And how is that?"

"You put it off and put it off, well now what? You can't put it off for much longer, Blackstar."

"You're right. I know I know, I'm sorry ok. I'm just stressed," Blackstar apologized looking at his paws. The younger cat made a good point.

"I know. Let's just sleep on it. I'll ask StarClan for guidance ok," Littlecloud said as they began to file back into the camp.

"Goodnight, Littlecloud and thank you," Blackstar called.

"You're welcome, Blackstar, goodnight," Littlecloud nodded and went to his den but not before noticing Darkpaw whimpering a little in his sleep. "Something is wrong with that kit," he said to himself thinking back on what Runningnose had told him, "I'll have to ask StarClan about him again, too." Littlecloud sighed. This was all getting annoyingly complicated.

_

"Sheesh save some for me, huh. You keep up like this and there won't be any prey left in this entire forest," Mudriver laughed finally catching up to his apprentice who had just successfully caught yet another piece of prey.

Darkpaw didn't respond. He simply buried the now dead mouse. It was his first hunting patrol and, while it normally would have been done with the other apprentices, Blackstar had realized that Mudriver seemed to be the one cat Darkpaw could get along with for extended periods of time. He hadn't really minded. The thought of spending the day attempting to tolerate Tigerpaw and the others while hunting hadn't exactly appealed to the young tabby's taste.

He had proven he was an excellent hunter to Blackstar the day before and Mudriver had promised that if he preformed well today he would begin his combat training tomorrow. That alone was making Darkpaw work especially hard, not that he really had to. He already knew a few moves simply by watching Thundertail take down her brother again and again when they would argue, but he wanted to know more. He wanted to be stronger. He wanted to finally be able to hold the other apprentices down and show no mercy like they had shown him none. He would prove who was truly the strongest.

"How do you keep finding these so fast? It's like they're practically telling you where they are and waiting for you," Mudriver said as the younger tom began to smell for more prey.

Darkpaw smirked. In a way, his mentor had been right. The prey _was_ practically telling him where they where simply by being alive, and since he could stalk effortlessly, it was just waiting for him to take its life.

Mudriver sighed and shook his head. Darkpaw was becoming less and less responsive every day. Almost nothing made the kit talk or smile anymore, not that much had in the first place. It was as if he was purposefully trying to deaden his emotions to everything ever since the gathering a few days prior. Despite his concern, Mudriver still was not going to the leader or medicine cat. If there was only one thing that made sense about this kit, it was that he wanted to be left alone. Mudriver desperately wanted to earn his trust and so did Thundertail and thrusting a bunch of unwanted attention on him was not the way to do it.

Mudriver was so lost in his thoughts that he almost tripped over the very cat he was thinking about.

"Watch it!" the apprentice hissed, ducking out of Mudriver's way.

"Oh so now you talk to me," Mudriver sighed looking down at the black and silver tom.

Darkpaw just rolled his eyes and kept walking. There was prey all over the forest, he just wanted a challenge. Suddenly he spotted the life signature, as he was calling it, of a sparrow high in a tree. He was about to race up the tree and grab it when a silver-brown streak shot past him and up the tree, snatching the bird and leaping back down in front of him in one fluid movement that couldn't have lasted for more than a second or two. Darkpaw stared in awe at his mentor's dexterity. He had never known Mudriver was capable of that. He himself needed to climb the tree and then re-assume a hunting crouch before he could get anything from a tree, but this young male had done it at once with such speed he only knew himself to posses.

"You wanna learn how to do that? Or you just gonna keep giving me the silent treatment?" the grey warrior asked dropping the small prize before his apprentice.

"How…how did you do that?" Darkpaw gaped, his voice straining slightly from lack of use.

"C'mon I'll show you," Mudriver chuckled. "First we gotta find something else in a tree."

"Over there!" Darkpaw pointed with his nose at a nearby tree.

Mudriver looked over and took several deep sniffs and found his apprentice to be correct. "Ok I'll show you how to get it only if you tell me how you do that afterwards, ok?" he asked still confused on the matter.

"Deal," Darkpaw said after thinking it over for a few moments.

"Alright." Mudriver proceeded to show his apprentice to show the proper technique of getting up the tree quickly and silently and how to be sure to snap the creature's neck in one shot and finally how to land so as not to cause injury from falling from such a height. Once Darkpaw seemed to have all of these aspects down he allowed his apprentice to try his luck with the creature in the tree which they had been tracking to make sure it was still up there.

Darkpaw backed up a little way from the tree before shooting forward and up. Despite his smaller size he scaled the tree almost as quickly as Mudriver and clamped his jaws around the creature's neck. He landed before his mentor holding his kill proudly.

"Nice job, but now it's time for you to keep your side of the bargain," Mudriver said.

Darkpaw sighed and dropped the sparrow. How was he going to explain this? "Well, when I close my eyes and sniff, I can…see the life in the forest. Like…when I do this," Darkpaw closed his eyes and sniffed, "I can see you, but it's not you it's an outline of you that tells me you're alive and healthy. When I look at the prey," he lowered his head, "it's just black but I know something is recently dead there. I can see little bugs crawling around and I can see the plants. The grass is a lighter color than the tree because it's dying and the tree is healthy," Darkpaw explained.

"Whoa wait. You mean you can see with your eyes closed just by sensing the life in the things around you? And they're different colors?"

"Yeah like cat's are redish-orange, prey is orange, bugs are brown, and plants are green. The lighter something is, the sicker it is. When I kill prey it gets really bright for a second then it turns black like the sky and the ground."

"So if it's black then it's not alive?"

"Nope."

"And you can see other colors thru the grass?"

"Yes, it's just got a little interference from the life signature of the grass," Darkpaw told his mentor. He didn't know where this would lead, but he had wanted to tell someone and he had promised.

"Life signature?" Mudriver asked not familiar with this term.

"That's what I call the colors. I also get a message in my head every time I smell something, too. Like how old it is, if it's mated before and when and how many babies it had, what gender it is, what diseases or parasites if any that it has, and what it's…feeling," Darkpaw said looking at the ground as he said the last part. Everyone always felt the same thing when he was around: fear, hatred, suspicion, it wasn't fair he had done nothing wrong.

"What do you see when you look at Blackstar?" Mudriver asked both curious and wanting to get his apprentice off this apparently sore subject.

"I see his main signature and eight other faded signatures surrounding him. Are those his other lives?" Darkpaw asked. Mudriver had told him that leaders had nine lives so he had assumed that's what the ghostly figures were.

"I dunno, I guess. Shit this is amazing. Have you told anyone else about this?" the older tom asked.

Darkpaw shook his head. "You're the first one. Are you going to tell Littlecloud and Blackstar?"

"Fuck no, not unless you want to. But, can we tell Thundertail? She might be able to help us figure this out some more," Mudriver suggested.

Darkpaw thought it over before nodding. "Ok, sure," he said with a shrug.

"Sweet! Now let's get this prey back to camp. You caught a shit load!" Mudriver praised.

If it's possible for a cat to blush, Darkpaw was doing it. He knew he had. He knew he was the best. But it was nice to hear it from someone else.

The two toms carried their load to the fresh-kill pile and Darkpaw ran a piece to Runningnose, ensuring there was nothing the elder needed before dashing back to Mudriver who had managed to summon Thundertail just as she returned from her border patrol.

"Ok let's go," Mudriver said as the tabby ran back up to them.

"So you guys are dragging me off to talk now? Oh boy, what could this mean?" Thundertail mumbled as she followed her brother and his apprentice out of the camp.

"Hmph, look at those three, sneaking off again. Stupid Darkstripe's probably trying to sway them to his side so he can stir up trouble. Damn little bastard," Tigerpaw snarled as he watched the trio walk out of the camp.

"Maybe they're just going off to relax. Honestly, Tigerpaw, I don't know what you have against Darkpaw. He doesn't seem so bad to me."

"How can you say that, Windpaw?! He's Darkstripe's _son_! He looks just like him and everything!" Tigerpaw yowled to his sister.

"So? Tawnypelt is Tigerstar's daughter and you seem to like _her _well enough," Windpaw countered.

"That's different. She was born in the forest, not brought by some rouge and she _chose _to come to ShadowClan. Her mother is from ThunderClan _not _BloodClan and plus she fought with us against them to drive those damned rouges out of the forest for good, and now we're just inviting one back?!" Tigerpaw said.

"It's not like he really had a choice. His mother brought him, she seemed to just want a good life for him and she chose our clan to do it," Windpaw meowed with a shrug.

"She probably just brought him here because she thought we were the second best to BloodClan. And think about it, _BloodClan _didn't want him! The rouges didn't even want him! Now what does that say, hm?"

"That we should be better than a group of rouges and not be so quick to judge an innocent kit because of his parents and his looks," Windpaw said staring at her brother's dark yellow eyes.

Tigerpaw just growled and turned away. "I'm going hunting," he mumbled and walked away from his sister.

_

"Whoa whoa whoa hold on, what?!" Thundertail yowled after Darkpaw and Mudriver recounted their discussion from earlier.

"You heard us, Thundertail. And I don't think he's kidding," Mudriver said calmly.

"What the fuck?! When did you find out about this?!" the she-cat nearly screeched.

"I found out about it the second day of my training and I just told Mudriver today," Darkpaw answered.

"Have you told-?"

"No, Thundertail, no one else knows and it's going to stay that way until Darkpaw says so, understand?" Mudriver cut in.

Thundertail nodded awkwardly, her mouth hanging open in shock. She tried to say something but it just came out as a squeak.

"You better close that thing, you'll catch flies," Mudriver grinned. Thundertail was still too shocked to respond but she did close her mouth.

"So I'll take it by your reaction that you have no idea what caused it either or what it is?" Darkpaw asked.

Thundertail shook her head. "No, no idea. Just…wow," she whispered.

"Well I suggest we go back to camp, get something to eat, and think about this whole mess later. Any takers?" Mudriver offered.

"Sure." Darkpaw shrugged.

"Yeah let's go," Thundertail said, finally beginning to break out of her funk.

Darkpaw walked behind the adult cats. Their reactions intrigued him. So this "gift" of his was unusual. He smiled to himself. He was even more powerful than he had thought before. Whether his clan hated him or not, _someone_ was on his side.

They re-entered the clearing and were met with the same reaction. Cats watched their every move until Darkpaw separated and walked off to the apprentices' den. It was not that he preferred to be there, it was just the only place he could normally be alone and his private "den" kept him from feeling the stares of the others.

He walked over to the den and was about to lie down in his nest when a voice startled him.

"Hello, Darkpaw," a female voice said softly.

The voice sounded familiar but he couldn't quite place it. He sighed and turned around to see a small white she-cat. Windpaw? Windpaw was talking to him? Why? And where was her brother? This could easily end in something bad.

"What's the matter? Don't you know how to say 'hi'?" Windpaw said with a smile. She didn't really know what to expect from Darkpaw, but she hoped being friendly might help since Darkpaw wasn't exactly used to that.

"H-hello…Windpaw," Darkpaw stammered after a while. He kept his nose active to ensure Tigerpaw wouldn't just appear out of nowhere and attack him for talking to his precious sister.

"See that wasn't so bad. How have you been?" Windpaw continued a little awkwardly. No one besides Mudriver, Thundertail, and occasionally Runningnose or Littlecloud ever really talked to the small tabby.

"Um…fine. I've been fine," Darkpaw responded.

"Good, good," the she-cat chirped looking at her silver paws. This wasn't going as well as she had hoped it would. This cat was really reserved.

"Windpaw?"

Windpaw looked up. He was actually saying something that wasn't a response. "Yes?"

"Why are you talking to me? Won't Tigerpaw be mad?" the small tom asked.

"My brother does not control what I do and I was just trying to get to know you," Windpaw sniffed.

"Well then what do you want to know?" Darkpaw asked flatly.

Shit, he had her there. What was she supposed to ask him? "Um…how's training going?" _'Stupid stupid stupid,'_ she mentally scolded herself.

"Fine," Darkpaw answered in the same monotone voice.

Windpaw was about to say something back when a loud yowl cut her off.

"Windpaw! What do you think you are doing talking to this…this…_thing_?!" Tigerpaw shouted walking up to the two other apprentices.

"Shut up, Tigerpaw. He's not a 'thing' he's another apprentice and _our _clanmate. And I can talk to whoever I want," Windpaw hissed.

"Not to pieces of shit you can't. Fuck off, bastard, leave my sister alone," Tigerpaw growled.

"Hey she's the one who started talking to me, dickwad," Darkpaw growled back standing up.

"What's going on here?" a calm voice asked cutting off Tigerpaw's retort.

"Nothing, Littlecloud," Tigerpaw said dipping his head in respect to the medicine cat. "Come on, Windpaw," he said and gently nudged his sister. She grudgingly went with him inside the den shooting an apologetic look to Darkpaw which he ignored.

"Are you alright, Darkpaw?" Littlecloud asked.

"I'm fine, Littlecloud," Darkpaw mumbled and lay back down in his nest. He turned over so that his back was towards the older cat. They both knew just how far from the truth that statement was.


	6. Chapter 5

"Hold still you little prick!"

"Not on your life, dipshit!"

The silver tom launched himself at his apprentice once again but the tabby easily dodged out of the way landing a thankfully sheathed blow to the warrior's shoulder before jumping out of reach again. It had taken a few times before the tabby learned to defy the instinct of unsheathing his claws to cause maximum damage, but it had happened eventually. "Oh come on give me a chance here!" the older tom complained.

"Give you a chance to hit me just to boost your self esteem? Hell no!" the tabby countered. He launched himself into the air and landed hard where the warrior's shoulder's used to be. He looked over in confusion and had to jump to avoid his mentor barreling into him with extreme force.

"Two can play at that game," his mentor growled turning back to face the kit.

"Bring it," he growled back dropping into a ready stance.

The silver cat rushed his apprentice again, but swerved to the side to give him a hard swipe to his hind leg. The kit miraculously jumped out of the way just in time and this time hit his mark directly on his attacker's shoulders. Despite his small size, he managed to come down with enough force to make his mentor stagger and eventually collapse as tiny fangs found the nape of the other tom's neck.

"Alright, alright I give. You win," Mudriver groaned.

"Told you I would," Darkpaw sniffed as he lept off his victim.

"I never said I didn't believe you, I just said 'prove it'. And don't forget who's been teaching you to do all this stuff," Mudriver reminded his apprentice.

"You didn't teach me all that stuff," the tabby countered.

"True, but you need basics first to achieve anything at all," his mentor reminded him.

Darkpaw looked at his paws. Mudriver was right. He hadn't known anything about fighting except from watching Mudriver and Thundertail arguing until Mudriver had started to teach him nearly a moon ago. He had become stronger and bigger, but he was still puny in comparison to the others.

While none of the clan would admit it, Darkpaw was probably the best hunter in the clan. He ended up sneaking his prey back to the pile so none of the clan but him could tell which pieces "the bastard" had put there. Cats where finally just giving up on trying to figure it out and were simply accepting that if he had planned to poison the food he would have done it by now.

No one's attitude had changed towards him, except perhaps Windpaw's. She tried to make conversation on a regular basis, but he almost always shot her down and the times when he didn't were the times Tigerpaw would run in and intervene.

Mudriver's loud yawn broke Darkpaw from his thoughts. "Well I'm exhausted. What about you?"

Darkpaw shook his head.

"Good 'cause you have hunting to do and it's you're turn to take care of Runningnose," Mudriver said before bounding off in the direction of the camp with much more energy than he had claimed to have.

Darkpaw just shrugged and began to look for prey. He could have found some instantly with the help of his "gift" but he was trying to familiarize himself with the standard way of tracking as well. Making sure to keep his eyes open, he began to wander deeper into the forest.

This way was slower and more difficult, but Darkpaw wasn't bad. He wasn't great, but he could probably still hold his self-proclaimed title of best hunter if this was the only way he could track his prey, though he might have to practice a little harder. He was also sure to practice his "gift" though, not wanting to loose it.

As he hunted, the forest was no longer the overwhelming place it had once been and the scents all seemed more natural. He could smell various herbs he had been asked to gather for Littlecloud from time to time, though no one was really injured or sick, leaf bare was coming and Littlecloud wanted to be ready for anything.

He finally tracked a vole to its home and proceeded to wait patiently for it to come within capturing range. This was when he brought his gift back into use. He watched the little creature skitter around inside its den, feeling perfectly safe, not seeing the tabby form waiting for him. He poked his head out and placed one paw out into the open. Paws, claws, jaws, the vole's life was over.

Darkpaw purred with satisfaction. He dropped the vole on the ground and buried it. He then debated on whether or not to hunt the standard way or his own way. Perhaps if he had chosen the latter the outcome would have been different.

He walked silently through the brush, waiting to hear or smell a good piece of prey. He did hear something. He stopped and spun around. That was too big to be prey. Darkpaw's hackles rose and his claws slipped out of their sheaths. He bared his fangs and closed his eyes, taking a deep whiff. _Male, cat, young, nervous/excited._ A crouching red-orange form appeared in the yellowed green. Darkpaw growled as other scents hit him. _Male, cat, young, confident. Female, cat, young, confident/excited. _Fuck, he was surrounded. Oh well, he could deal with a warrior. What were these apprentices?

Twice as big and more experienced than he was. The three juveniles launched into the air, springing into the small clearing with Darkpaw. He opened his eyes and saw the first one he had noticed was Speckledpaw. The clumsy calico must have not been watching where he was going and stepped on a twig, prematurely alerting Darkpaw to their presence judging by the slightly annoyed looks the other two were shooting him.

"What do you want, Tigerpaw," Darkpaw hissed, turning to face his enemy.

"You mean you can't figure it out? You're that stupid?" the other tabby snorted.

"Well you're reasoning behind anything has never made much sense to me seeing as it's something I'd expect from a retarded kittypet," Darkpaw explained.

Tigerpaw hissed and unsheathed his claws further followed by Thicketpaw then Speckledpaw. "You'll pay for that, bastard," Tigerpaw snarled. The orange tabby's tail lashed to the left and before Darkpaw could blink the other two apprentices were launching themselves at him.

Darkpaw quickly lept into the air, sending the two crashing into each other. He sprang back and growled. "Is that all you've got?" he taunted.

Tigerpaw hissed and jumped over his downed followers. The tabby's hissed and swiped at each other, testing each other, before Tigerpaw initiated the actual fight. Darkpaw ducked under the aggressive smack and clawed his opponent's shoulder from underneath before rolling away. Tigerpaw screeched in pain as a small drop of blood squeezed its way out of the wound. His eyes filled with hatred as his gaze swept around to rest once again on the black and silver mass waiting for him. Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw had finally righted themselves and lead a surprise attack from behind. Darkpaw ducked again and sent the two flying over him. Thicketpaw righted herself quickly while Speckledpaw nearly rammed into Tigerpaw. Tigerpaw jumped over the calico and lunged at Darkpaw with Thicketpaw. Darkpaw couldn't duck or jump due to the positions of the advancing cats. He rolled to the left but wasn't prepared when Speckledpaw appeared out of nowhere and rammed into him. Momentarily stunned, Darkpaw could do nothing as Tigerpaw swept him up and slammed him into a tree, pinning him there with his front paws. Darkpaw hissed and tried to rake his back claws on the other tom's belly, but Tigerpaw had one paw placed on his stomach and the other on his chest, making Darkpaw incapable of attacking due to his shorter legs. While he stopped struggling, he continued to hiss and growl as his tail lashed side to side angrily. Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw came up on either side of their friend/leader and grinned cruelly at their prisoner.

"Good work, Speckledpaw," Tigerpaw praised making the calico tom swell with pride. "And you of course, Thicketpaw." The she-cat copied the other apprentice's behavior but looked away bashfully for a moment. "Now to deal with you." Darkpaw growled as the amount of pressure the tabby was putting on his body increased. "I still don't know why Blackstar is letting you live, but you are _not _welcome here. Nobody likes you, nobody ever will like you. You are nothing, always have been, always will be. You remember that and **stay away from my sister**," Tigerpaw hissed growing to a shout by the end. He pushed off Darkpaw's body and allowed the smaller tabby to slump to the ground out of breath and angry. He flicked his tail and the other two followed him back into the trees, shooting glares and smirks back at their victim.

Darkpaw watched them disappear back into the forest in the opposite way of camp. They probably still had hunting to do. Tigerpaw's words echoed in Darkpaw's head. A familiar feeling began to build up in his chest. It hurt unbelievably and made Darkpaw's vision blur. No, not out here! He snatched up his vole and began to dash back to camp. Pausing only to pick up two squirrels he had caught earlier.

He flew through the camp entrance, dropping the two squirrels on the fresh kill pile and ran the vole to Runningnose. The rest of the clan was momentarily confused by the black and silver streak speeding thru camp.

"Runningnosei'llberightbackijustneedaminute!" Darkpaw said quickly and started to shoot towards the apprentice's den.

"Whoa whoa whoa hold on a second. What?" the elder said using his front paws to stop the fleeing apprentice.

Darkpaw spun around reluctantly, the pain slowly growing evident on his face. "Just give me a minute, ok, I'll be right back I promise," he said a little more slowly trying to break out of the ex-medicine cat's grip, but Runningnose had been trained to hold back even the strongest warrior to ensure he could deliver the proper treatment so this kit was nothing.

"What happened? Do you want to talk about it? What's wrong?" Runningnose asked a little worried by Darkpaw's actions and the pain that was coming across his face.

"**LET ME GO!!!**" Darkpaw screamed managing to wriggle out of Runningnose's grip in the elder's surprise. He sprinted to his nest and practically dove under the stump to retrieve his bone. He squeezed it tightly to his chest, waiting for the pounding to subside. His body shook and his breath came out short and quick.

"Darkpaw?" a soft female voice from behind him said. He recognized the scent and voice without closing his eyes.

"Windpaw! Leave me alone," he said quickly. He was beginning to panic. No one was supposed to see him like this, especially not her and his treasure was out in the open!

"What's wrong?" she asked reaching for him, but he flinched away.

"Don't touch me, just go," he panted not daring to face her.

"Darkpaw-"

"GO!" he hissed. He felt her slowly back away. He knew she wanted to help, but she wasn't helping.

"Ok fine, but if you need me-"

"I don't need you, please I just want to be alone," he said his voice barely above a whisper. He didn't really want to be alone. He didn't want her to leave, but she had to. She had to go before he lost control and started to shake and cry again. She did go, and it somehow made the pain worse. Darkpaw clutched his treasure closer and closed his eyes.

_

"Darkpaw…Oy! Darkpaw! Wake up."

Darkpaw felt something nudging him. He slowly opened his eyes, then they snapped open. He looked up and saw that the sun had set almost completely behind the mountains. "Shit I fell asleep!" he hissed angrily. He looked down in a panic suddenly, but calmed down when he saw that his treasure had slipped back into its hiding place while he had been out. But panic came back once again. "Runningnose!" He had never gone back for him!

"Relax, Windpaw took care of it for you, but Blackstar wants to see you," Mudriver whispered.

"What? Why?" Darkpaw asked dread and fear setting in despite his best attempts at making it stop.

"I don't know, he just told me to come get you," Mudriver said giving his apprentice an apologetic look.

Darkpaw just nodded and walked off to the leader's den. "Thank you, Mudriver," he called over his shoulder. Mudriver just nodded.

"Blackstar?" Darkpaw called into the leader's den.

"Come in," a deep voice from the back ordered.

Darkpaw took a deep breath and entered. The den was big and dark. He almost couldn't see his leader's paws at first until his eyes adjusted. He saw that he was not alone. Littlecloud, Runningnose, and Windpaw were also in the den. A new wave of dread swept over the little tabby.

"Sit," Blackstar ordered.

Darkpaw did.

"Would you like to explain your little episode earlier?" the white tom asked.

"Episode, sir?" Darkpaw whispered daring to look up from the floor to face his leader.

"You shouted at Runningnose, then Windpaw and failed to return to help Runningnose as was your duty today," Littlecloud meowed from the corner.

"Oh, that."

"Yes that, care to explain?" Blackstar asked again.

"No not really," Darkpaw admitted.

Blackstar hissed in annoyance. "No? Are you stupid or something?"

"Oh come on, Blackstar, he's a young tom, he doesn't want to explain what he was thinking or…or feeling," Runningnose said glancing at Darkpaw who held his breath.

"Windpaw, why did you say you went to talk to him?" Littlecloud asked.

"He seemed sad about something, I wanted to help," Windpaw said quietly not looking up.

Darkpaw looked away. He hadn't meant to make her sad. He just wanted to make her go away.

"Darkpaw, will you wait outside for a moment please?" Littlecloud asked gently.

Darkpaw nodded and walked out of the den, not bothering to look up.

"Windpaw you may go too," Littlecloud told the white she-cat.

Windpaw dipped her head and also exited the den. She could not catch Darkpaw's eye when she walked past so she simply walked back to her nest in the apprentice's den and waited for her brother and friends to return from their patrol.

_(Inside Blackstar's Den)_

"Something was troubling him, Blackstar. Something he wanted to keep hidden. He's blocking off his emotions and I'm worried about the consequences of that," Littlecloud voiced.

"I agree. There was nothing aggressive about him, he just wanted to be let go and I think me seeing him like that is what scared him and made him freak out," Runningnose added.

"So what do you suggest we do? I can't just tell him it's ok to flip every time he gets a little emotional. What the hell got him so distraught like that anyway?" Blackstar said.

"I don't know, but there's no way we're going to get anything out of him like this, it's too intimidating. We need to get him into a one on one environment that he won't think has anything to do with extracting information from him," Runningnose told the younger cats.

"Like what? Get Mudriver to try and get something out of him?" Littlecloud asked.

"No, Mudriver would never do that no matter what it's for. He's too intent on letting Darkpaw come out on his own and earning his trust," Blackstar interjected.

"I've got an idea. Punish him for disrespecting his elders by making him spend the day with me tomorrow," Runningnose said.

"Oh that is a punishment," Littlecloud laughed.

"Shut up," Runningnose growled lightly, nudging his former apprentice good naturedly. "I'll try and get something out of him, I've been dying for some company and he seems very interesting," Runningnose finished.

"That sounds like a good idea," Littlecloud agreed.

"Fine, call him back in," Blackstar said.

"Darkpaw you can come back now," Littlecloud told the waiting tabby.

Darkpaw followed the medicine cat back to his leader and elder.

"Darkpaw, as punishment for disrespecting Runningnose, you will not go training tomorrow but will instead stay in the elder's den all day. You will do whatever Runningnose tells you to do. Get him fresh kill, herbs, basically if he has an itch, you scratch it, understand?" Blackstar ordered officially.

Darkpaw nodded. Yes he understood. Of course he understood. He had spent three fucking moons doing that, he could do it with is eyes closed, literally.

"Tomorrow night, Runningnose will report to us if your behavior was acceptable and if it was then you may return to training but you will continue to take care of him for a full week."

Darkpaw nodded again. He was staring directly at his leader, not blinking. His eyes didn't even move as his head tilted up and down slightly to signify his understanding.

"Good because you are spending the night, too," Runningnose said and began to herd the apprentice out of the den.

Darkpaw's eyes showed his surprise. Littlecloud and Blackstar exchanged confused looks before they both shrugged. Littlecloud followed the two out and went back to his den while Blackstar just lay down and tried to relax.

Once they were out of the den, Mudriver came running up to his apprentice. "Hey, Darkpaw, what happened?" the grey tom asked looking worried.

"He's going to be spending the day with me tomorrow," Runningnose explained before Darkpaw could open his mouth, "I hope you're ok with me stealing you apprentice."

"I uh…well I guess…sure ok fine if you have to," Mudriver stuttered glancing down at the silver and black tom. He didn't want to spend a day without his apprentice, in fact, he was beginning to consider this kit as one of his closest friends, not that he had many close friends or friends in general. And he knew that he was the tabby's only friend except for Thundertail.

Darkpaw gave his mentor an I'll-tell-you-later look and followed Runningnose back to the elders den.

"Are you going to make a nest?" Runningnose asked seeing Darkpaw simply curl up in the far corner of the den.

Darkpaw shook his head and laid his head on his paws.

"Well at least come closer, I don't bite I promise," Runningnose said with a jerk of his head.

Darkpaw sighed and walked closer to the single elder's nest.

"That's better. Goodnight, Darkpaw," Runningnose yawned laying his head down and curling his body slightly.

Darkpaw grunted a response and curled into his usual tight ball, placing the tip of his tail on his nose and covering his right eye in the crook of his right paw. He sighed and fell asleep, praying that the next day would pass quickly.

Runningnose cracked his eye slightly, watching the apprentice sleep. He noticed the protective position he took and noted how he seemed restless, his leg or ear twitching occasionally. It would be interesting to see just what it looked like in the morning when this kit woke up. Then the whimpering started…

**Aww poor Darkpaw's dreaming again. Yech! I know this chapter's a little short but hopefully the next one will be longer. How do you think Darkpaw and Runningnose will get along? Reviews, as always, make Darkpaw happy!**


	7. Chapter 6

Darkpaw's head shot up his eyes wide. He was panting and shaking from a dream he could not remember now that he was awake. He looked around and saw that the ground around him was covered with claw marks and, judging by the amount of dirt in his fur, he had rolled around a lot. He sighed and stood up.

"Maybe it's good I can't remember the dream if it got me _that _riled up," he said to himself shaking the dirt from his coat.

"Well you seemed to be convinced someone was after you," Runningnose said.

Darkpaw jumped in surprise and his claws instinctively unsheathed. He had thought the elder to be asleep. Seeing that there was no threat he allowed his fur to lay flat once again and sheathed his claws.

"You sure are a jumpy one," Runningnose chuckled getting up slowly and shaking some stray moss from his fur.

"How do you know what I was dreaming about?" Darkpaw asked choosing to ignore the comment.

"You were whining in your sleep. I tried to wake you up but you're a really heavy sleeper," the elder answered.

Darkpaw's eyes widened once again. He spoke in his sleep? He would have to fix that somehow but right now he had to find out what he had said and what this older cat might possibly know. "What did you hear?" he asked.

"Well it was sort of hard to understand since your voice was muffled by your paw and I was only half awake. Plus you were mumbling," Runningnose said scratching his neck lazily with his hind claws. "But you seemed to think someone was chasing you and trying to hurt you. You have any idea why?"

"Nope none, everyone has nightmares sometimes right, what's the big deal?" Darkpaw said quickly.

"Uh-huh," was all Runningnose said in response. _'What are you hiding, Darkpaw? What goes on behind those icy eyes?' _the elder thought as he saw the kit sit nervously before him looking at his paws.

"Was there um anything you needed, Runningnose?" Darkpaw asked.

"I think I'll go sunbathe for a while and you can tidy up in here a bit. Come out to me when you're done," Runningnose said and left the den before Darkpaw could respond.

Darkpaw suppressed a hiss at the task appointed to him but got to work. He removed all dry bedding and dirt from the den making a pile of it just outside the camp behind the den. He gathered new bedding for Runningnose and did his best to make an acceptable nest for the old cat. He wiped away the claw marks he had made in the dirt the night before with his tail. Once he was satisfied with his work he gave himself a quick groom before walking out to where Runningnose was laying, his belly openly exposed to the bright sun.

"Done already?" the grey and white tom asked not opening his eyes to view the apprentice.

"Yes, what now?" Darkpaw said not really bothered by the elder's actions. He would have probably done the same if he was as comfortable as Runningnose looked.

"Hm, how about you just lay here with me and relax," Runningnose suggested.

"Um, ok," Darkpaw responded and lay down next to the ex-medicine cat, curling up as usual.

Runningnose cracked an eye and saw the position the tabby had chosen to take. "What are you doing? Come on it's a sunny day. The cold is coming you should enjoy it," the elder said.

"I am enjoying it," Darkpaw said lifting his head. He was really indifferent about the situation but he didn't want to tell Runningnose that.

"I mean get comfortable. Stretch out, be a cat," Runningnose said punctuating his comment by stretching out all his limbs in an exaggerated manner.

"I've never done that before," Darkpaw admitted. He had never felt comfortable enough to expose himself like that.

Runningnose realized this but didn't mention it. "I won't tell if you won't," he told the kit with a wink.

Darkpaw glanced doubtfully around the camp. It was rather bare and the cats who weren't out hunting or whatever were lying around or talking lazily. "Ok, I guess I could try it," he said. He didn't know what the big deal was but in order to avoid conflict he might as well do as he was told.

"That's it," Runningnose said as Darkpaw rolled uncertainly onto his back. He was holding all of his limbs stiff as though he was waiting for an attack, but at least he was willing to do it. "Come on, relax," Runningnose said soothingly.

After several jerky movements, Darkpaw finally looked relax, though his mind was racing. _'What if it's a trick? It would be just my luck. But Runningnose doesn't seem like he wants to do that. But I never know.' _Darkpaw nearly jumped as Runningnose's voice interrupted his thoughts.

"Well now your body is relaxed, but you think too much," the elder scolded.

"Think too much?" Darkpaw said in confusion, turning his head to look at the tom next to him. How could one think too much? He was just being prepared.

"Yes, you think too much. Relax your mind. Stop thinking of whatever it is that's troubling you. You're a kit for StarClan's sake! Start acting like it!"

Darkpaw was shocked by the old cat's words. "What do you mean?" he asked rolling onto his side.

"I've never seen you play or relax or just enjoy your life. What is bothering you so much?" Runningnose looked over at the little tabby's blue eyes.

Darkpaw just sighed and rolled onto his other side. "Nothing, I'm just not like that I guess," he mumbled.

It was Runningnose's turn to sigh. This could be harder than he had originally thought.

"Well all this laying around has gotten me a bit sore. How about you go to Littlecloud and get him to give you some herbs for me, you got that?" Darkpaw nodded and trotted off in the direction of Littlecloud's den.

"Um, Littlecloud? Runningnose needs some herbs he said he's sore," Darkpaw said uncertainly as he walked into the fresh smelling den.

"I'll be right there, Darkpaw, just give me a moment," Littlecloud called from the back of the den.

"Ok," Darkpaw called back and simply sat down. His gaze traveled over the many herbs that covered the small shelves on the den walls. He saw a few small red berries that looked interesting. With a glance to the back of the den to make sure Littlecloud was not coming he cautiously approached the small berries. He had never seen such herbs as these before. They were a deep red that reminded him of blood and they seemed to shine like large droplets of the stuff. Curious, he leaned towards them and sniffed tentatively. One word flashed in his mind: _Death._

"What are you doing?" A young voice from behind startled the apprentice and caused him to stagger back.

Darkpaw wheeled around to see Littlecloud watching him. "I was uh just…the berries I've never seen anything like them and…I was curious, I just wanted to know…what are they? I'm sorry," Darkpaw stammered and looked at his paws.

Littlecloud's eyes flashed in amusement at the apprentice's reaction to being caught. "It's alright, kit, all cats are curious. You should be careful about what you stick your nose into, it could be dangerous. Would you like to know what those are?" he asked.

Darkpaw nodded, not looking up.

"Those are death berries. Just one can be enough to kill you and that many would kill the strongest warrior," Littlecloud explained gesturing towards the berries behind Darkpaw.

Darkpaw stiffened at this information. So much trouble over such little things. Such little things could be so dangerous. He was little, and he would be dangerous. Darkpaw raised his head and looked back at the berries. _'We have something in common, you and me. They would never expect such a threat from such little things, but you proved them wrong and I will too. But if it takes one of you to kill me and I am so much bigger, how much more damage could I cause? Yes we are very similar, my little friends, very similar,' _he thought a smirk growing on his young face.

"Alright I've got those herbs you needed," Littlecloud announced startling the tabby once again.

Darkpaw hadn't even heard him move. The small tom made almost no noise. "Thank you, Littlecloud," he said dipping his head before accepting the small package of herbs. He turned and started out of the den.

"Good luck, Darkpaw, the old cat can be a trial sometimes," Littlecloud called after him.

"Ok," he mumbled back though gritted teeth.

"This would be so much easier if I could read minds," the small tabby medicine cat sighed unaware that his former mentor was thinking the same thing as another tabby approached.

"Hey there, have a nice visit did you?" Runningnose asked as Darkpaw trotted over.

"Yeah, sure," he responded dropping the herbs in front of the elder.

"Well you're a lively cat, aren't you?" the old tom grunted and gratefully took the herbs.

"I don't like to talk," Darkpaw said flatly.

"So I've noticed and so has little Windpaw," Runningnose said swallowing the last of the herbs.

Darkpaw didn't respond but just laid down a little ways away from the elder. He wished Mudriver would come back. Though he didn't want to admit it, he missed his mentor's company. He missed getting out of camp and…relaxing. It was true, the only time he ever felt relaxed was when he was not in camp but with Mudriver and Thundertail at their special spot under the tree. It was even better than when he was curled up in his nest at night with the knowledge that his treasure was right there with him. Suddenly his head shot up. His treasure! He had left it all night what if someone had found it?!

"What are you thinking about, kit?" Runningnose asked seeing the tabby's sudden show of alarm.

"Uh nothing I just need to go and check something," Darkpaw said quickly before dashing off towards the apprentice's den. He got out of sight behind the stump and looked into his hiding spot, carefully moving a few pieces of moss. He reached in and felt something hard, when he pulled his paw out, it was only a rock!

"No no no please StarClan no!" Darkpaw whimpered and he reached under again. Dirt met his groping paw as he tried desperately to retrieve his form of nightly security.

"Hey, Darkpaw, you alright?" Runningnose called.

"Fine, Runningnose, I'll be right back," Darkpaw called back around the stump before going to his frantic search. The familiar ache started to form in his chest again as he felt his heart pound. He couldn't have lost it! He couldn't! It was the only thing that kept the pain away.

He scrambled to push dirt and dry leaves out of his way. He reached in as far as his small legs could and he felt the tip of his paw brush against something in the way back of the hole. He lifted his paw and extended his claws carefully, hooking them around the object and pulling it towards him.

"Please, oh please oh please, StarClan let this be it," he prayed. He didn't know much about StarClan but if they would help right now him he didn't need to understand.

The object came into view and he almost cried out as he saw it. He swept if out still in his claws. _'Oh StarClan,' _he thought as he held the bone close to his chest, _'thank you thank you thank you!' _His body was trembling and hot but being reunited with his treasure soothed it slowly.

"Hey, Darkpaw, you didn't fall asleep did you?" a familiar old voice called.

"No, Runningnose. I'm coming," Darkpaw said. He carefully put his treasure back in his hiding spot and this time ensured it was accessible before tidying up his nest so it didn't look like he had torn thru it like he had in his desperation. Once satisfied that his area looked normal and he himself was stable, he took a deep breath and strode casually back to Runningnose.

"What were you doing over there?" the elder asked.

"Well cleaning up your nest made me think I might want to see about getting some new bedding for mine. I've had the same material since I made it and it's not as comfortable anymore. Not that it matters since I don't really need a nest but it was a thought." It was not entirely false, he had been thinking about changing his bedding since he hadn't touched it since he had gathered it. He had never cared to. He had slept on old dry bedding in the nursery so doing so now was no big deal, but there was no way he was going to tell Runningnose or anyone else for that matter, about his treasure.

"Uh huh…well ok then," Runningnose said not bothering to hide the doubt in his voice. He could sense that whatever made this kit run over there had done something emotionally to him. It was something he cared about and he obviously could care less about the state of his nest.

"So was there anything else you needed now, Runningnose?" Darkpaw asked wanting to change the subject.

"Go grab me a small piece of fresh kill then come keep me company," Runningnose answered with a yawn and a stretch.

Darkpaw nodded and trotted off to the fresh kill pile. The first part of this task he could do, but he didn't really want to sit in the elder's den with Runningnose and keep him company or hear him talk for the rest of the day.

"Oh well, it's not like I have a choice," he sighed to himself as he approached the pile. He chose a small mouse and took it back to the old tom.

"Aren't you hungry?" said tom asked when Darkpaw dropped the prey before him.

"No," Darkpaw said flatly.

"Did you even eat yesterday?"

"No."

"And you're not hungry at all?"

"I already said 'no'."

"I think you should eat something."

"But I'm not hungry." Darkpaw was growing agitated. He had been hungry earlier but it had passed and he didn't feel like eating anyway.

"Go get something to eat. That's an order. Do you want to stay here even longer?" Runningnose warned.

"Fine!" Darkpaw hissed and stormed back to the pile. He chose a vole hardly bigger than the mouse he had taken to Runningnose. "Happy now?" he asked sarcastically as he lay back down by the elder and started tearing into the flesh of his meal. He trembled as the bite slithered down to his empty stomach. He hadn't been eating as much and when he did it started hurting.

"Are you sure you're ok?" the grey and white tom asked.

"Yes, Runningnose, I'm fine. I'm eating see, look." He took another larger bite of the vole and almost spat it out as it stretched his unused esophagus. He tried to stop himself from panting after it had finally made its way down but it had hurt so much he couldn't help it.

"How much have you been eating lately?" Runningnose asked watching this.

"As much as I want," Darkpaw said hoarsely.

"Ok and how much do you want?" he pushed.

"…Not much," Darkpaw admitted in a whisper.

"I thought so. Why aren't you eating?"

"Because I'm not hungry." Darkpaw didn't like all these questions but, like before, he had no real choice.

"Ok and you're not hungry because…?"

"I don't know, I'm just not. What does it matter I get stuff for the clan no one said I have to eat it," the tabby said grimacing down at his barely touched meal.

"You're health says you have to eat it," Runningnose said. This kit's confession worried him.

"No one else seems to care about my health, why should you and why should I?" Darkpaw sighed pushing the vole aside and laying his head down. He would finish it later, maybe.

"What makes you think no one cares about you or your health?" the older tom asked.

"Oh come on don't act like you don't see the shit I go thru on a daily basis. No one here likes me, I'm only here because I have nowhere else to go," Darkpaw snapped staring forward.

"Well you could always go back to BloodClan," Runningnose offered.

Visions of his forgotten dream flooded back to Darkpaw suddenly.

_He was watching a she-cat running desperately around strange figures. They were huge and square-ish and had square parts on them that reflected the moon. The ground was one big Thunder Path and monsters screamed by. She looked unbothered by the monsters but terrified about something else. Some cats started walking by. He caught some of their conversation but could not see them since the she-cat had ducked under a large smelly thing. Her heart rate increased significantly as they got closer._

"_You think she'll be there, Frost?"_

"_Only if she's stupid, but hey she might be, I mean, look who she mated with."_

"_So why are we checking if we don't think she'll be there?"_

"_Because, Slash, we might be able to follow her scent from there and see where she went and if she took her little baby with her."_

"_She might have killed it."_

"_How barbaric, Honeydew! That's what I love about you. You come up with the perfect solution to everything while keeping to the BloodClan standards."_

"_Well, either way, Reaper and Darkstripe's kit will die."_

"_They don't deserve to live anyway…"_

_Suddenly Darkpaw was standing before Blackstar. He felt so much smaller._

"_He will be Darkstripekit, but call him Darkkit if you choose," the tom growled before the scene dissolved._

_A silver tom, black and white tom, and gold she-cat launched themselves at him. A scream tore out and blackness came. Tigerpaw's voice rang out a single word:_

"_Darkstripe…"_

Darkpaw snapped back into reality. He glanced over to Runningnose and saw that the elder was giving him a strange look. Then, he did something the elder never would have expected.

"Tell me about Darkstripe. Tell me about my father," Darkpaw said giving Runningnose a serious look.

The elder reeled back slightly in shock. He wanted to know about his father? Well it made some sense. This kit always heard something foul about his father and hardly anything about his mother. There was no doubt that his father was a large part of the reason Darkpaw was so disliked, ShadowClan was used to rouges from BloodClan. Hell, most of ShadowClan _was _BloodClan by now or at least partly.

"Ok well, what do you want to know?" the grey and white tom asked.

"Everything, and tell me about Tigerstar too," Darkpaw demanded.

"Alright. Darkstripe was originally born in ThunderClan, I'm sure you know that." Darkpaw nodded. "Well he wasn't exactly the most popular kit, but Tigerstar, Tigerclaw at the time, agreed to mentor him. Darkstripe grew very close to Tigerclaw, and Tigerclaw returned the affection. Darkstripe wasn't the most talented apprentice, but he would jump in front of a monster if Tigerclaw told him to. Eventually Darkstripe became a warrior, but he still wasn't very popular, he only ever really hung around Tigerclaw. Tigerclaw on the other paw was very popular. He was probably one of the best warriors this forest has ever seen which made it strange that Darkstripe was so incredibly inferior in skill. If you ask me, I think Tigerclaw purposefully didn't train him as well as he could have so that Darkstripe would not be able to rival him. After all, Tigerclaw was ambitious. He brought rouges to the forest and tried to take over ThunderClan and eventually the forest. He ended up getting banished by ThunderClan after trying and succeeding in killing the previous leader, Bluestar, but he became leader of ShadowClan not long after and Darkstripe was not far behind to join us as well after he got banished for trying to poison a kit that saw him talking to one of the BloodClan rouges. Tigerstar got RiverClan to join us and the two clans did terrible things. Darkstripe aided Blackstar, Blackfoot at the time and was also a rouge, in the murder of a RiverClan warrior named Stonefur. Tigerstar wanted him killed because he was half-clan. His father was a former RiverClan deputy named Oakfur while his mother was actually Bluestar."

Darkpaw was shocked for a moment. Blackstar had been a rouge. He had helped Tigerstar and killed a cat with Darkstripe yet he was trusted enough by everyone to be leader.

"Anyway, Tigerstar met his downfall in Scourge, the former leader of BloodClan. Tigerstar offered BloodClan a share of the forest if they helped him take over it, but Scourge wanted the whole thing. When Tigerstar got too confident, Scourge took him out and challenged the rest of the clans for the forest. Firestar, the current leader of ThunderClan, got the rest of the clans to unite to fight BloodClan. Darkstripe was nowhere to be seen, we believe he was staying with BloodClan but when the battle finally happened he was not fighting for either side. He was only concerned with killing Firestar and he almost succeeded until Greystripe, the ThunderClan deputy, caught him off-guard and killed him." Runningnose finished explaining and watched Darkpaw's reaction.

The apprentice's mind was racing a mile a minute. So that was it? Those where his father's terrible crimes that he was now paying for. _"What the fuck?!" _Darkpaw shouted in his head. That entire thing was due to Tigerstar's influence and Tawnypelt was Tigerstar's daughter yet they all trusted _her_. And even Tawnypelt didn't trust him. So what if she _chose _to join ShadowClan? Darkpaw was free to go whenever he wished but he chose to stay even with all this shit.

There was no doubt about it, Darkpaw was angry. No, more than angry he was pissed. Runningnose could feel the intense emotion radiating off the kit. But this didn't seem to be a result of aggression, it was confusion. This little apprentice was responding to his confusion with anger, something most kits wouldn't do. His claws flexed and his jaw clenched as a low growl escaped his throat.

"What's wrong, young one?" Runningnose asked even though he knew the answer. If he was going to get information from Darkpaw, now might be the best time to do it.

"It doesn't make any fucking sense. I didn't do anything to anybody and they all hate me. Tigerstar was a hell of a lot worse than Darkstripe yet everyone trusts Tawnypelt and not me just because she chose to come here on her own. I WAS ONE FUCKING MOON OLD!!! IT WASN'T MY FAULT!!!" Darkpaw screamed.

"Ok so it wasn't your fault, what makes you think we don't believe that?" Runningnose pressed.

"You see the way they treat me. They act like I'm gonna kill someone or something. Fuck them I haven't done anything except what I'm told! I didn't ask to come here but they act like I did. They act like I want to destroy everything. And that stupid Tigerpaw and his cronies, I never did shit to them but they attack me constantly. I wish I could show him. I WILL show him. One day…" Darkpaw trailed off panting heavily in anger.

"Tigerpaw attacks you?" Runningnose asked remaining calm.

"Yeah, he's convinced I'm gonna hurt his sister or something. Him, Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw attacked me yesterday just because she talks to me," Darkpaw growled. Suddenly he realized what he had just said. "Don't tell anyone! You didn't hear that!" he nearly shouted.

"Tigerpaw won't find out you told me," was all Runningnose said.

Darkpaw was about to say that wasn't good enough before he saw the border patrol returning. His head lifted up and his ears pricked up. Mudriver had been with that patrol. Sure enough, the dirty grey warrior was the first to bound thru the entrance.

"Darkpaw," he called as he raced over to his apprentice.

Darkpaw allowed his excitement get the better of him as he dashed out of the den to meet his mentor. "Hi Mudriver! Hi Thundertail!" he called as he met them in the middle of the clearing.

"Hey kit," Thundertail said ruffling the fur atop his head with her paw. Darkpaw playfully batted it away.

"So how's it been going so far with old Runningnose, hm?" Mudriver asked.

"Not so bad I guess. When can I start training again?" Darkpaw asked seriously.

"Well if Runningnose thought you acted properly today, then I guess we can restart combat tomorrow," Mudriver offered.

"Good," Darkpaw said.

"As fun as talking to you has been, the day is not over yet. You better get back to Runningnose," Thundertail said. Both Darkpaw and Mudriver groaned at the thought of having to spend even more time apart. "Oh c'mon you guys will have all day tomorrow but if he stays here much longer you might not," she defended.

Darkpaw and Mudriver looked at each other. "She's right, you should go. I'll see you later," Mudriver said.

"Yeah, ok, bye guys," Darkpaw agreed and dashed off back to the elders' den.

"Welcome back," Runningnose greeted without opening his eyes.

"Sorry I was just talking to Mudriver and Thundertail," Darkpaw mumbled.

"It's ok. I understand. You haven't seen your mentor/best friend all day," Runningnose said with his eyes still closed.

"Best friend? When did I say Mudriver was my best friend?" the tabby asked.

"You didn't, but it would make sense. Let's face it, you're not very popular. Mudriver and Thundertail are probably your only friends and it just goes to assumption that Mudriver would be your best friend. Am I right?" The elder rolled onto his stomach and looked into the apprentice's cold blue eyes.

"I guess so," Darkpaw mumbled looking away.

"Exactly, now I'm tired so I'll be going to sleep now," the elder said and rolled back onto his back.

Darkpaw pondered the option of just sneaking out, but the clan was returning. Someone would undoubtedly see him and report him to Blackstar. It wasn't worth risking going back to training tomorrow. He sighed and curled up. He closed his eyes and allowed sleep to attack him once again.

_

The rest of the day passed slowly and uneventfully for Darkpaw. Runningnose had him get him another piece of fresh kill but this time did not force him to eat anything. Darkpaw saw Mudriver and Thundertail walk by a few times and would nod a greeting to the two of them. They always would be reluctant to go but knew they had to.

Finally the sun set and Blackstar summoned Runningnose and Darkpaw to his den. Darkpaw was told to wait outside while Runningnose went in to give his report to the leader and medicine cat.

_(Inside Blackstar's Den)_

"So, Runningnose, how'd it go?" Blackstar asked.

"He's an interesting one alright. Did everything I told him to even if he didn't want to. He had multiple chances to walk out when he thought I was asleep but he never did," Runningnose said.

"Well it's not as though he really has anywhere to go, plus the clan would have seen him," Blackstar said dismissively.

"Oh come on, Blackstar, give him some credit. When I asked him to get me a piece of fresh kill he did so but when I asked him to eat some himself he tried to refuse. He doesn't eat much, the little bit he did eat I thought would make him sick just by the way he was looking at it. He asked about his father. That's where it got very interesting," Runningnose continued.

"Really? Well it makes sense that he would be curious. After all, he never gets a moment of peace from hearing about Darkstripe," Littlecloud voiced.

"My thoughts exactly. But you should have seen how confused he got with how Blackstar and Tawnypelt could be trusted when he couldn't. When you think about it, he has a bit of a point," Runningnose told his former apprentice ignoring Blackstar's twitch at being reminded of his past. "I believe what caused his breakdown yesterday was an attack from Tigerpaw, Thicketpaw, and Speckledpaw."

"What did they do?" Blackstar asked.

"I'm not sure, but it had something to do with the fact that Tigerpaw doesn't like that Windpaw tries to talk to him."

"Call them in here," Blackstar ordered.

"No. As your elder and former medicine cat I am going to have to ask you not to bring this into the light. Darkpaw did not intentionally give me this information and asked me not to tell anyone else," Runningnose said raising his tail to stop Littlecloud from leaving the den to carry out Blackstar's order.

"Fine," Blackstar growled after a while. "Is there anything else you got?"

"He's not very secure. He's traumatized, my guess is that it's because of what Snaketail did to him," Runningnose said.

"Makes sense. She wasn't the best choice of a surrogate, but she was the only option," Littlecloud said.

"Yeah. Is that it?" Blackstar asked.

"Yes," the elder answered.

"Very well, send him in," Blackstar ordered.

"Darkpaw, you may come in now," Littlecloud informed the little tabby and lead him back into the den.

"Darkpaw, you carried out your punishment acceptably. Runningnose informed us that you did as you were told so you may return to the apprentice's den and go back to training tomorrow," Blackstar informed the apprentice.

Darkpaw dipped his head. "Thank you, Blackstar. May I go now?" he asked.

"Yes, go on," Blackstar said and watched the tabby apprentice dash out.

"You think we should look into his eating problem?" Littlecloud asked.

"There's not really anything we can do. He's a kit, when he gets hungry, he will eat," Runningnose said.

"But how much of a kit is he anymore?" Littlecloud wondered.

"That, I do not know," Runningnose admitted.

"I'm beginning to think ShadowClan are just doomed to bad luck," Blackstar groaned.

"Maybe, but think of how much more interesting that makes everything," Runningnose laughed. He took the glare from Blackstar as his cue to leave. "Come, Littlecloud, let's leave him be," he said and lead the small tom out of the den.

_

"So how'd it go?" Mudriver asked.

"I can return to training tomorrow," Darkpaw said unable to hide the excitement in his voice.

"Sweet! Ok now go get some rest. Don't think I'll go easy on you just because you missed a day," Mudriver ordered.

"I know," Darkpaw said and dashed off to the apprentices' den.


	8. Chapter 7

Darkpaw surprised Mudriver by already being awake when his mentor came to get him. He left out the fact that he had not really slept that night. It wasn't that much of a deal since he had spent a large amount of the previous day sleeping.

"Well someone's eager to get back to training," Mudriver laughed after getting over the shock of the tabby jumping up at him when he had approached.

"Come on let's just go," Darkpaw urged and began to walk out of the camp. He was determined to get better at fighting if it killed him. He would show Tigerpaw his place.

"Ok ok I'm coming, damn," Mudriver said and followed the tabby out of the camp.

Darkpaw was the first to reach the training ground and quickly dropped into a battle-ready pose.

Mudriver smirked in amusement at his actions. "You sure don't waste any time, do you?" He copied his apprentice's stance and the two cats circled each other for a few minutes, sizing each other up even though they had fought before.

"You want the first move," the tabby called in a taunting voice.

"With pleasure you little runt," Mudriver said and shot forward.

Darkpaw rolled out of the way just in time and began to circle his mentor, snarling menacingly. Mudriver swiped out but missed by a hair. Darkpaw shot forward and got ready to clamp his jaws around the grey tom's neck but Mudriver saw this coming and raised his leg so the kit's jaws clamped on his paw. The large tom slammed his paw and Darkpaw with it onto the ground. Darkpaw let out a grunt and released his grip. While his apprentice lay panting, Mudriver caught his throat and threw him to the other side of the clearing. Darkpaw quickly righted himself and launched himself at his mentor, keeping careful track of the older tom's body stance. When Mudriver tried to roll to the right, Darkpaw was ready and landed on his mentor's chest, succeeding this time in getting his jaws at the cat's throat.

"Ack! Ok you win! You win!" Mudriver coughed as Darkpaw squeezed lightly. Darkpaw smirked and jumped off his mentor. "Jeez, kit, you're a hell of a lot better than most apprentices that have been training as long as you have."

"That's because I learned how to avoid getting hit before I became an apprentice," Darkpaw said proudly.

"I guess, but damn you're so quick."

"I know," the tabby said with a grin. His small white fangs glinted in the sun.

"Ok well now that you're warmed up, let's go again," Mudriver said. He stretched and several of his bones cracked. He cracked his neck and dropped into a crouch. "C'mon, c'mon. Where am I going? Here? Here? Here?" he said quickly jumping around in an attempt to throw his apprentice's direction off. "Here!" he shouted and jumped at Darkpaw's back.

Darkpaw sensed the attack and ducked, sending his mentor yowling over his head. "My turn!" he called and jumped onto Mudriver's back.

Mudriver yowled again and tried to buck him off, preventing Darkpaw from sinking his fangs into the tom's neck. Finally, Mudriver rolled over. His superior size crushed Darkpaw and forced the tabby to release his grip. The grey warrior jumped up and prepared to sink his fangs into the tabby's neck, but he rolled out of the way just in time, causing the warrior's nose to collide painfully with the dirt. Mudriver hissed in pain and staggered back. Darkpaw took this opportunity to knock his mentor to the ground on his back once again.

A giggle from the trees stopped the toms' activities.

"Who's there?" Darkpaw growled jumping off Mudriver and dropping into an aggressive stance once again.

"Thundertail," Mudriver groan and got up.

"Aw how'd you know?" Thundertail whined. She stepped out of the brush pouting slightly at being found out.

"I know that mocking laughter anywhere," Mudriver grumbled.

"Now why would I be mocking my brother?" Thundertail asked innocently.

"Because he got his ass handed to him by an apprentice," Darkpaw offered cockily.

"Oh that's right," Thundertail said as though she had just remembered.

"Shut up, I'd like to see you try and fight him," Mudriver mumbled.

"If it's any consolation, Mudriver, she doesn't stand any better of a chance," Darkpaw said with a grin at Thundertail.

"Oh is that right? You'll find I'm a better fighter than my brother, kit," Thundertail spat as she dropped into a fighting crouch.

"Bring it on, you can't take me," Darkpaw hissed copying the she-cat's actions.

Thundertail flew at Darkpaw in a flash of black and yellow and claws. Darkpaw barely had time to dodge out of the way and Thundertail's fangs came close to grazing his shoulder. She spun around much quicker than Mudriver and ran at him again. Slightly disoriented by having to make another decision so quickly, Darkpaw allowed his instinct to take over and he lept into the air. His small body landed squarely on the she-cat's back and she crashed to the ground and rolled a few times. Darkpaw jumped away and stood ready as she righted herself.

"My turn," he said and jumped at her.

Thundertail looked up to see tiny claws stretched ready to hit their mark on her face. She rose onto her hind legs and slapped the paw away. This caused Darkpaw's entire body to spin around and his back crashed into the Thundertail's stomach. Ignoring the breath getting knocked out of her, Thundertail clamped her front legs around the tabby form. Darkpaw's mind flashed back to Speckledpaw containing him in such a way and he began to struggle. He lifted his hind legs and clawed viciously at his captor's legs and face. Thundertail hissed in pain and staggered back, releasing her grip on the apprentice. She automatically closed her eyes and did not see Darkpaw as he jumped at her chest, knocking her backwards. Her back contacted with the ground and she felt sharp fangs prick her skin gently as Darkpaw held his open jaws over her throat. Finally getting her wits about her again, she opened her eyes and saw the back, tail, and ears of her would-be killer.

"Nice going, champ," she said as Darkpaw climbed off her.

"I know. He shocked the hell out of me. He's so quick I can't get a single good hit on him. I think his only weakness would be wrestling because of his size, but with speed like that, he's hardly got reason to worry," Mudriver agreed walking up behind his apprentice.

Darkpaw turned around to look into his mentor's proud face. He looked away bashfully. Once again, he knew he was good, but it was nice to hear someone admit it. Mudriver and Thundertail were probably the only ones who would though.

"Well if he needs to work on wresting, why not have him do it?" Thundertail suggested.

Darkpaw's head shot up. "But I thought I didn't need it!" he cried. He was good at fighting, but wrestling was extremely difficult for him. Any one of the cats could smother him easily. He had just bet on the thought that his opponent would never get close enough to him to even think about wrestling. The closest anyone had gotten was Thundertail when she had him in her grip. There was no doubt that he would be taken down in two seconds by Mudriver's superior strength. Mudriver must have sensed his concerns because he came to Darkpaw's aid.

"C'mon, Thundertail, with big cats like us there's no way we could catch him in a wrestling match and if we did it would be over in two seconds. In order for him to get a good shot at winning a wrestle, it would have to be with someone his own size or close to it. An apprentice or maybe a cat the size of Littlecloud is the only one who really has a shot at getting him like that anyway," Mudriver explained.

"Fine then, have him go against another apprentice," Thundertail pressed.

Both toms were shocked into silence. Have him interact with another apprentice? Have him _fight _another apprentice?! No way! They all hated him enough as it was, there was no way Mudriver would be crazy enough to force Darkpaw to actually fight one of his "den mates".

"Ok let's do it," Mudriver said finally.

"WHAT!" Darkpaw shrieked. He gaped up at his mentor like he was trapped in a monster's night beams.

"Hey half the reason you became an apprentice so early was because you needed to socialize and this is the perfect chance to do it and boost your fighting skills. You're good at fighting us, but let's see how you fare with someone you can't run under," Mudriver said calmly.

Darkpaw looked at Thundertail for help but knew he would get none.

"So who should we put him up against?" Thundertail asked.

"Windpaw, she's the closest to his size," Mudriver decided.

Darkpaw groaned. Perfect, just fucking perfect! He could just imagine the shit Tigerpaw would give him if he injured his sister.

"Good idea. Do you know where Blackstar took her today?" Thundertail asked.

"No but c'mon how hard can it be to find them? Let's ask Littlecloud," Mudriver said and began walking back to camp.

After a groan and a nudge from behind by Thundertail, Darkpaw followed.

Once they entered camp, they made a beeline for the medicine cats den.

"Oh, hello Mudriver, Thundertail," he greeted as they entered. "Oh sorry Darkpaw, I didn't see you there," he apologized as Darkpaw appeared from behind his mentor's bushy tail.

"We were wondering if you knew where Blackstar went with Windpaw today," Mudriver explained.

"I think he said he was taking her to that small patch of grass under the tree behind the two-leg dump," Littlecloud said, "Why do you ask?"

"We need to work on Darkpaw's wrestling skills," Thundertail told the tabby.

"Ah I see. Well that should be where you find them. If not, they might be hunting. Good luck," Littlecloud called as they left the den.

"Thank you, Littlecloud," Thundertail called back.

The group made their way to the two-leg dump quickly. Darkpaw had never been here before but he quickly noted the awful smell.

"Two-legs are disgusting," he hissed under his breath.

"I know," Mudriver agreed wrinkling his nose.

They thankfully began making their way upwind from the dump as they made their way to a lonely oak with some healthy looking grass around it. Some grunts could be heard as two white cats fought under it. One was significantly bigger than the other and had great black paws which he was currently using to bat the small, silver-legged one around. The black-footed one suddenly stopped his attack and raised his nose into the air. He backed off the little one and she also sniffed as Darkpaw's group approached.

"Hey guys," Mudriver called.

"Hello, Mudriver," the black-footed cat called as they got closer. The silver-legged one bounded up to greet them happily.

"Hi, Windpaw," Thundertail greeted warmly as the silver and white apprentice pressed her head to the older she-cat's flank.

"Hi, Thundertail! What brings you guys here?" she asked as she turned to greet Mudriver.

"We were hoping you might be able to help my little buddy here with his wrestling skills," Mudriver said pushing Darkpaw forward slightly as he finished greeting the smaller she-cat.

Windpaw looked a little surprised to see Darkpaw here. The little tom looked down at his paws, not wanting to meet the she-cat's pale eyes.

"You want to put Windpaw up against your apprentice, Mudriver?" Blackstar asked as he approached.

"If that's ok with you, sir. Me 'n my sis here were just thinkin' it could help him," Mudriver said dipping his head.

"Hm, what do you think, Windpaw?" Blackstar asked.

"It's alright with me, sir," Windpaw said respectfully.

"Alright then let's do it," Blackstar said and led the group back under the shade of the tree. The adult cats formed a sort of half-circle by the trunk of the tree as the apprentices faced each other calmly.

Darkpaw was feeling very conflicted. He knew he needed the practice for his wrestling skills, but he also knew that no good could come from Tigerpaw as a result of this. But if he worked on his skills now, he might stand a better chance against Tigerpaw and the others later. Deciding that that was his best bet, Darkpaw began walk towards Windpaw as she approached him.

The apprentices dropped into ready stances with their noses barely a mouse-length apart. They rose onto their hind legs and wrapped their front paws around each other, biting and pushing each other in an attempt to throw the other one off balance. Windpaw lifted her opponent up slightly and Darkpaw's paw's slipped out from under him. He landed on his side and Windpaw was upon him in a flash. He hissed and kicked with his hind legs like he had been told to do, boxing Windpaw's stomach harshly. She let out a grunt and lost some focus and Darkpaw was able to roll on top of her. He tried to get his fangs to her throat, but his mouth was blocked by her silver paw. A hard kick to his stomach sent him flying off. He landed on his paws and glared at Windpaw as the two began circling each other. The growling apprentices flew at each other again and met in the middle in a growling hissing pile of fur.

The adults watched the pile of silver, black, and white rolled across the grass, then separated, then joined again in a flurry of fangs and claws. Finally the ball broke apart again to reveal the juveniles panting and tired but neither one quitting.

"You think we should but a stop to this?" Thundertail asked.

"Nah, they'll be fine," Mudriver said.

Windpaw jumped at her tabby opponent again and hit him hard in the chest. With a grunt, he fell over with Windpaw pinning him down. Too tired to kick out strongly enough, he was helpless as the she-cat's fangs dove to his throat. The white fangs scrapped his skin before she lifted her head back up and climbed off him. Darkpaw lay there for a few moments, panting and stunned. He had never been bested before. Mudriver had gotten a couple of swipes on him before, but never was an open kill-shot available.

"Well done, Windpaw," Blackstar praised as his apprentice approached. Mentor and apprentice touched noses and then the group turned their attention to the tabby who was currently getting back up.

Darkpaw staggered a bit but soon raised himself up to stand proud as he usually carried himself. His cold gaze swept over each of the cats in turn as his little body swayed a little.

"Hey, good job, Darkpaw," Mudriver said comfortingly and walked over to help steady his apprentice.

Darkpaw just moved away, refusing to make eye contact with any of them. He had lost. In a one on one fight he had lost! He had never done that before. He had only ever been beaten when he was ganged up on by Tigerpaw and the others.

"Yeah, Darkpaw, you're a good fighter. You're just not used to wrestling I guess," Windpaw meowed.

"Can we go again?" Darkpaw asked quietly.

"It's ok with me," Windpaw said looking up at Blackstar.

"If you want to. Mudriver?" Blackstar looked at the other apprentice's mentor.

"Hell yeah! That was awesome! Let's go!" Mudriver nearly shouted and ran back to his place under the tree, waiting excitedly.

Thundertail smirked and joined her brother. "Good luck," she told Darkpaw.

"Make this a full on fight, not a wrestling match," Darkpaw said as Windpaw approached him again.

"Ok but don't think that'll help you win," she said and backed up some.

Darkpaw just smirked and lowered himself into a fighting crouch. He sprang at the she-cat full-force. He felt his claws graze her shoulder as she tried to roll away. She hissed but didn't waiver. Darkpaw shot at her again but she was expecting it this time and swiped at him. The tabby ducked under her blow and struck her shoulder from underneath. She hissed again and staggered back. Darkpaw wasted no time and in a flash was upon her. She quickly struggled and kicked out with her hind legs while swiping at his face, forcing him back. He backed off her slowly and she finally swung and nearly cuffed the side of his head, but she had over-estimated how much she had managed to disorient him and he ducked. This time, he shot forward and tackled her stomach, making her fall back with a yowl. She managed to roll on top of him, but he swung blow after blow at her neck, making her gag so she quickly jumped back. Darkpaw flipped onto his paws and the two began to circle, hissing and growling like before.

Windpaw initiated the next round by running straight at him. He prepared to roll out of the way, but she swerved and met his dodge while he was not on his paws. She clasped the young tom's neck and flung him away. She prepared to jump on him, but he kicked his hind legs up and she was thrown over him and onto her back. Darkpaw righted himself in a flash and jumped over. He didn't go around to pin her entire body but simply held down her upper body. This gave her the opening she needed and she began clawing at the top of his head with her hind claws. He yowled and staggered back, rubbing his sore head. She lept at him immediately pinning him down.

"Gotcha!" she said triumphantly.

"Don't be so sure," he hissed and freed his front legs, using them to batter her chest, neck, and chin until she raised her head up. As soon as she did this, exposing her milky colored neck, Darkpaw rose up and clamped his jaws softly into the silky fur there.

Windpaw gasped and froze. She felt the tabby's claws digging into her shoulders as he used them to hold himself up and keep his tiny fangs gripped around her throat. He released her neck and rose up a little more until his mouth was by her ear.

"Gotcha," he hissed before releasing his grip and slithering out from under her.

"Alright! That's my apprentice!" Mudriver shouted, snapping the white she-cat back to reality.

"Nicely done, Darkpaw," Thundertail praised.

"Are you alright, Windpaw?" Blackstar asked the still slightly stunned apprentice.

"Mm-hm," she said with a nod and smile to her mentor, "He's a lot better than I thought."

"Yes, he is," Blackstar agreed, "But I'm still proud of how well you did. You got a little too cocky at the end, though. That helped him get his opening."

"Yes, Blackstar," Windpaw said looking down. She was a little ashamed, she had acted similarly to her brother and she had never agreed with his methods. It wasn't that she had been trying to taunt him, though. It had just been fun to get to "play" with the little tabby. She couldn't help her playful nature. The thing was, that was the closest she had ever gotten to Darkpaw, and he had only seen it as a fight. She supposed she should see it the same way. It had been a training exercise, nothing more. Attempting to convince herself of this, Windpaw lifted her head up and walked over to the small tabby.

"Congratulations, Darkpaw. You did really well," she said with a small grin to the young apprentice.

Darkpaw glanced at Mudriver and followed the silent instruction the grey tom's nod said. "Thank you, Windpaw. You did too," he said and tried to return the smile.

"Is that your smile?" Windpaw gasped.

"Yeah, I guess. Is something wrong with it?" Darkpaw asked a little panicky.

"No, I like it," she said and grinned again, "You should do it more often."

"I'll uh take that into consideration," he stammered. He looked away shyly, thoroughly embarrassed. He heard Mudriver and Thundertail chuckle behind him and even Blackstar snickered.

"Well it's been a long day. I think we should get back to the camp and let our apprentices take care of hunting," Blackstar said. The other adult cats agreed and followed him back into the forest after saying 'goodbye' to the younger cats.

"Well I guess I'll see you around," Darkpaw said and began to walk away.

"Wait, we could…hunt together…I mean if you want to so you won't be so alone," Windpaw said quietly, refusing to make eye-contact with the small tabby and finding something very interesting at her paws.

Darkpaw considered the offer for a moment. He looked at Windpaw and his heart sank when he saw a small scratch across her cheek. Tigerpaw would discover that for sure and his scent was all over her. "No, I prefer to hunt alone. I should go," Darkpaw said quickly and dashed away before Windpaw could answer or protest.

At first, the white she-cat was confused, but a small breeze made the scratch on her cheek sting and she realized how much Tigerpaw would disapprove. While he would do nothing to her, Darkpaw was probably in for something unpleasant and she couldn't help him. No cat in the clan, not even Blackstar, would bother trying to stop anything Tigerpaw might plan. With Darkpaw's skills, Windpaw had no doubt that he could hold his own against her brother, but Tigerpaw would not be alone and Darkpaw would have no chance at a three-to-one match up.

"I'm sorry, Darkpaw," she sighed and walked back into the forest.

_

Windpaw walked back into the camp. Her jaws were full of the prey she had just caught, though she wasn't feeling very proud. Darkpaw was still bothering her. He seemed nice enough, according to what Mudriver and Thundertail had told her, but he seemed unable to make any friends. Not that he really had a choice. The entire clan seemed set against him and Thundertail and Mudriver had forced themselves into being his friend. She could not do that because of her stupid cuss of a brother.

"Fucking Tigerpaw, why's he so over-protective?" she hissed to herself as she dropped her catch on the pile. Not feeling hungry herself, she walked back over to the apprentice's den and lay down.

"Windpaw," a familiar voice called. Windpaw groaned and rolled over. "Windpaw, I'm talking to you," the voice said.

"What do you want?!" she hissed getting up. She glared at the large tabby standing in front of her.

"What happened to your face?!" Tigerpaw shrieked when she turned to him.

"Nothing, I hurt it training that's all," she mumbled and lay back down.

"What the…why do you smell like the bastard?!" the tabby shrieked again.

"Because I trained with him today, that's why. Now shut up and leave me alone," she growled.

"Did he do that? I'll kill him," Tigerpaw hissed.

"I never said he did it and even if he did, we were training so fuck off," Windpaw yelled at her brother, getting back up and advancing on him.

"Why were you training with _it_?" Tigerpaw questioned wrinkling his nose.

"Because Mudriver asked me to and I didn't have a problem with it. Get out of my life, Tigerpaw. I can take care of myself. And Darkpaw's not an "it" but _you _should be," Windpaw shouted and walked off.

Tigerpaw growled and flexed his claws at his sister's behavior but did not go after her. "She does not understand. How can I make her see that he is the lowest of the low? He plays all innocent but I know the truth. You can't fool me, Darkstripe," the tabby growled before turning around and taking off back into the trees.

_

Darkpaw continued walking thru the woods in the opposite direction of the camp. He hadn't heard Windpaw following him so he'd stopped running. He had found several pieces of prey, but his heart just wasn't in hunting today.

He sniffed around half-heartedly. Part of him was looking for prey, the other half was waiting for the attack he knew would be coming. A mouse made the mistake of running by him and he quickly snatched it up. After burying it, he continued on his way.

"Tigerpaw's taking a while," Darkpaw mumbled. He had expected to run into the larger tabby sooner, but his path was never easy to follow. He unconsciously took random turns and twists, never following a direct course or path. Sometimes he had to follow his own scent to get back to camp.

Finally, the moment he had been waiting for came when he heard a rustle from behind him. With a sigh he turned around just in time to get tackled by the cat leaping out from the brush behind him…

**Here we go again, Darkpaw's being attacked. How do you think he will fare this time? I'll try to update ASAP and don't forget: reviews make Darkpaw happy!**


	9. Chapter 8

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**T.J.- black tom with a half white face and bright green eyes. Kittypet/ringfighter. Brother of J.T. son of Lynn and Shadow**

**J.T.- white tom with a half black face and dark blue eyes. Kittypet/ringfighter. Brother of T.J. son of Lynn and Shadow**

**Lynn- pure white she-cat with one green eye and one blue. Kittypet/ringfighter leader. Mate of Shadow and mother of J.T. and T.J.**

**Shadow- solid black tom with one green eye and one blue. Former rouge now ringfighter leader. Mate of Lynn and father of J.T. and T.J.**

**Ginger- ferocious calico she-kit(a week older that Darkpaw). Ringfighter apprentice. Daughter of Nina and Clash(not mentioned in this chapter)**

Darkpaw grunted as the heavy form nearly crushed him. He kicked out with his hind claws in a last attempt to stall his fate. Much to the tabby's surprise, it worked. His attacker flew off howling in pain. Darkpaw didn't question this and simply flipped onto him paws. He turned to get a look at which one had attacked him this time but another form barreled him over. He righted himself quickly before his attacker could do anything.

Darkpaw eyes widened as he looked at the tom in front of him. "W-who are you," he growled his fur bristling.

The tom in front of him looked amused. The left side of his face and the rest of his body were completely white, but the right side of his face and his right ear were black. His tail flicked behind him. Darkpaw saw that around his neck was a black collar. He was a kitty-pet!

"He is a talented one, brother," Darkpaw's original attacker said getting up. This cat was the exact opposite of this brother. The right side of his face and the rest of his body were solid black and the left side of his face and left ear were white. Around this ones neck was a white collar.

"Indeed, and he has anger in his eyes. This kit knows hatred," the white one said.

"Answer my question before I slice you both open, kittypets," Darkpaw hissed.

"I am T.J. and this is my brother J.T.," the black one said.

"What business do you have here," Darkpaw growled not letting his guard down even as T.J. moved to stand in front of him with his brother.

"Well I saw you earlier when you were fighting the older tom and she-cat and later when you fought the white she-kit. I felt showing you to my brother would fascinate him as you fascinated me," T.J. said.

"Yes and I am starting to agree with my brother from what I see in you and what he told me. We have a proposition for you," J.T. said. The two brothers were now circling Darkpaw in two different directions with the mismatched sides of their faces clearly visible to Darkpaw.

Darkpaw's hackles rose as his tension did. "What is it?" he asked trying not to keep his focus on either one for too long. The colors kept confusing him until he could no longer tell which was which or if he was even still looking at the other one. The confusion was making his head spin and he could feel his body swaying.

'_I've gotta stop this,' _he thought. Immediately he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Two orange forms appeared amongst the green and black. What he had learned about this technique was that since he was not using his eyes and only his nose, he had perfect 360 vision. He remained still as he watched the cats circle him without looking at them.

"Brother, what is he doing?" the gruff voice that belonged to J.T. asked.

"I am not sure," the smoother voiced T.J. answered.

Darkpaw suddenly sprang to life and lept at the signature he had identified as J.T. The tom screeched as the surprise attack hit him hard in the side. Darkpaw still had his eyes closed and was keeping a view on T.J. as well. T.J. seemed just as shocked as his brother and had stopped his circling. Darkpaw wheeled around and slashed his way over to the black tom.

T.J. was not one to be caught flat-footed and sprang away, but Darkpaw still knew where he was and turned again, catching his claws on the tom's shoulder. T.J. screeched in pain as he felt his flesh rip from the tiny razors in this kit's paw.

"His eyes are not open but he can see us!" J.T. shouted to his brother.

"That's right," Darkpaw said in an icy tone that matched his eyes as he slowly opened them to view the two brothers now standing together just opposite him. He slowly began to walk towards them, extending his claws every time he put his paw down then retracting them as he lifted it back up.

"How can you do such a thing?" T.J. enquired, forcing himself to stay still as the small assassin approached.

"To be quite honest, I don't really know. But I do know this, you two are on _my _territory and I don't take very kindly to that particularly from kittypets who have the audacity to then challenge me," Darkpaw spat. He wasn't sure where this confidence was coming from but he liked it. Seeing these two cats cowering before him out of respect seemed to be a vision of what was to come. "Now, you two better have a damn good reason for your crimes or I will tear you into such small pieces even crows won't want you," he finished with a growl and punctuated his threat by stopping in front of them and extending his claws to their full length. His cold eyes burned into the mismatched kittypets as they struggled to hold their ground.

J.T. was the first to regain his composure under the icy stare. "Like we stated before, we have a proposition for you. You are clearly a talented fighter despite your youth and size and I believe we may have a place where you can make those skills realized," the white tom said.

"Hm…show me this place," Darkpaw ordered not letting his guard falter at all.

"But of course, follow us," T.J. said is his wispy voice that could have passed for a hiss even.

Darkpaw followed the twins silently, keeping a close watch on their movements. Every once in a while he would check to make sure there would be no surprise attacks from other cats.

They started going further and further thru the trees and Darkpaw eventually smelt the scent marker that marked the edge of the ShadowClan border but they had gone in the opposite direction from the rest of the clans so this must have been the back of the territory. The sun was almost completely gone and Darkpaw's paws prickled in anticipation. He knew Mudriver would start worrying if he wasn't back soon and he was still supposed to take care of Runningnose. T.J. seemed to sense his tension.

"Kit, what is troubling you?" the black tom asked.

"If I don't return soon, my leader will probably punish me," he admitted.

T.J. turned to his brother and the two whispered something that he could not hear before T. J. turned back to him. "Meet us here tomorrow at sun-high, understand?" he said.

Darkpaw nodded and bounded back into the trees. He could sense the surprise coming from the two brothers that he would be able to find his way back on his own in the dark and smirked.

Darkpaw put his gift into over-drive to catch as much prey as possible. He used all his speed to run back to camp, but the amount of prey he had and the smallness of his jaws slowed him down significantly.

He finally walked into the camp not long after the sun had set beyond the mountains. Mudriver ran over to him immediately.

"Where have you been? I was worried and Blackstar was getting suspicious," the grey warrior hissed.

Darkpaw simply gestured towards the many pieces of prey he had before dropping them on the pile. "I also chased off some kittypets," he said. He had rehearsed this lie in the guess that he would be expected to explain the scent he had acquired from fighting T.J. and J.T.

"What were kittypets doing here?" Mudriver asked in a more rhetorical way but Darkpaw shrugged in response.

"I didn't ask," he said flatly. He picked up a vole and carried it to Runningnose's den.

"Oh so you're alive," the elder said with a grin.

"Sorry I'm late, Runningnose, I ran into some trouble and had to chase off a couple kittypets," Darkpaw apologized.

"Kittypets hm, did they give little Darkpaw a rough time?" the older tom joked.

"Hardly, I had them running away like scared kits after barely batting an eye," Darkpaw scoffed slightly annoyed at the elder's lack of confidence.

"I'll bet you did. Well I really don't have much use for you today seeing as you did such a brilliant job yesterday so feel free to go," Runningnose said.

"Goodbye, Runningnose," Darkpaw said dipping his head before trotting back out into the camp. Darkpaw was then approached by Blackstar and Mudriver, which would have put him on edge if Mudriver's proud expression didn't cancel out Blackstar's naturally hard one. "What's going on," the tabby asked.

"I told Blackstar about your little adventure hunting and-"

"You may take tomorrow off if you so choose. This won't be like when you had to stay in camp, you can go wherever you want and do whatever you want except go into the other clans' territories or into the two-leg dump," Blackstar cut off the grey tom.

"Really? Thanks, Blackstar," Darkpaw said. This day couldn't have gone better if he had planned it. A free day gave him the opportunity to look into that "proposition" T.J. and J.T. had mentioned. Blackstar nodded and walked back to his den as it got progressively darker.

"Well it sounds like I finally have a chance to sleep in. Wake me up if you wanna do any training anyway tomorrow, k?" Mudriver yawned.

"Ok," Darkpaw agreed. Mentor and apprentice separated to their different dens after exchanging quick goodnights. Darkpaw finally allowed his yawn to escape as he curled up in his nest. He realized that his bedding was rather dry as it crunched gently under him. _'Maybe I actually will change it,' _he thought sleepily. But now was not the time for that, he was tired and he wanted to ensure that he was wide awake for whatever it was those two kittypets had planned.

_

"Momma…momma…"

_He looked down at the dead, bloodied body of the black she-cat at his paws. The two toms and other she-cat smirked at what they had accomplished. They didn't seem to notice Darkpaw at all._

"_That was easier than I thought," the silver tom snickered._

"_Yeah I guess she didn't have much fight in her after she lost her little baby," the gold she-cat laughed._

"_I wonder where she did take him," the black and white tom said._

"_Who cares? If she did leave him in the forest, no clans would take him. They all hated Darkstripe just as much as we do," the silver one spoke up._

"_I guess you're right," the black and white smirked._

"_Of course I am. Now come on," the silver said and began to lead the others away._

"_Momma," Darkpaw whimpered looking down at she she-cat. He couldn't see her properly. He was seeing her as a kit, his vision unfocused and blurry. He blinked several times knowing this was his mother. He wanted to see her. He wanted to know what she looked like, but he couldn't tell. Everything was out of focus, even the other cats had been. Darkpaw whimpered in frustration at not being able to see his mother. He felt small, smaller than he actually was. He felt like a tiny kit again._

_He looked around. He was alone and if anyone did come they could not see him. He took a deep breath and curled up next to the she-cat. His mother. His true mother. Not Snaketail._

"_Momma," he whimpered again, "Momma wake up. Don't leave me I don't wanna be alone." But she didn't wake up, and Darkpaw knew she wouldn't. Her body was cold and her life signature wasn't there. Those other cats. They were responsible for this. Darkpaw's claws extended and dug into the dirt._

"_They will pay. They will pay for this," he growled. The pain in his chest melted into a hot, burning feeling. It spread thru his entire body slowly and he thought he might actually be on fire. He had never actually seen fire, but he knew it was hot and this was hotter than he had ever felt before. His tongue hung out of his mouth and he began panting angrily._

_Forgetting completely that he was just dreaming, Darkpaw got up and raced off in the direction the other cats had taken. All surroundings disappeared and he was just on a black plane with stars surrounding him on all sides. Directly in front of him were the three cats. He saw their red eyes glowing despite his inability to see properly._

"_What do you want, little kit," the silver one hissed cruelly._

"_I WANT TO KILL YOU, YOU BASTARD!" Darkpaw cried and launched himself at the offending tom…_

___

Darkpaw's eyes snapped open and his head shot up as he panted. His limbs were shaking, though he wasn't sure from what. He looked at the placement of the sun. Sun-high wasn't for a few hours at least. He got up and stretched. Upon sniffing, he realized that there was no one inside the apprentice's den.

"They must all be out training," he mused. He had never been inside the apprentice's den before. Taking a quick glance around to make sure no one was watching, he slipped inside.

It wasn't exactly impressive, mainly dirt with four nests for each of the other apprentices. Darkpaw did note that these nests were in much better shape than his own. He sniffed and discovered that the nests when in a set order. Speckledpaw's was the farthest in the corner to Darkpaw's left. A little to the right of that one was Thicketpaw's, Tigerpaw's, and Windpaw's in that order very close together so that they almost looked like one nest.

"Figures," Darkpaw mumbled to himself. Deciding that nothing in here interested him, the tabby apprentice stepped back out of the den. At first the sun's harsh rays hitting his eyes caused him to hiss and back up into the shade of the den, but after letting his eyes adjust to the light, he stepped back out. It was no wonder the other apprentices were usually harder to wake up. In darkness such as that, one could go all day never knowing if the sun had come up.

Darkpaw looked with disinterest around the camp. It looked unbelievably dull since he knew he didn't really have anyone to talk to or hang out with. Hope came in the form of a crooked yellow tail flicking back and forth in the warrior's den. Only one cat in the clan had a tail like that. He bounded over to the site, ignoring the looks he got as he went.

"Thundertail," he called into the den. Said black she-cat began stepping out of the shadows in the den and, for a moment, Darkpaw was reminded of his dream. Shaking the thoughts away, he greeted the she-cat. "Good morning, Thundertail."

"Good morning, Darkpaw. You get bored being around camp already?" she laughed with a hint of a yawn.

Darkpaw nodded. "Is Mudriver here too?" he asked.

"Yeah let me get him," Thundertail said and went back into the den. Darkpaw could her as she ordered her brother out of his slumber. "Hey! Wake up you lazy tom! Come on get up!"

"Mmph, Thundertail, not now I'm sleeping," a groggy voice moaned.

"Not anymore you're not. Now get up," Thundertail snapped. The sounds of a slight scuffle could be heard.

"Ouch! Thundertail quit it! That hurts!" Mudriver whined.

"Get up! You're apprentice wants-" Before Thundertail could finish her sentence, Mudriver had rocketed out from under her and was at the entrance of the den.

"G'morning, Darkpaw," Mudriver greeted happily.

"Hello, Mudriver. Do you mind if we get in a little more combat practice today?" Darkpaw requested.

"Sure, but I have the sun-high patrol," Mudriver said glancing at the placement of the sun.

"No problem," Darkpaw said, "You coming, Thundertail?"

"Sure let's go," said she-cat agreed stepping out of the den. The sun shone off her glossy coat making it look like she had golden stripes.

The trio made their way to their usual spot under "their" tree.

"Ok so what do you wanna try first?" Mudriver asked.

"Um, I was wondering if we could practice two to one combat," Darkpaw said shyly.

"Two to one? Well sure I guess we could do that. How do you want to be split up?" the grey tom asked.

"You and Thundertail against me," Darkpaw said without having to think about it. He had known since last night what he planned on doing today. He was going to sharpen his skills in this area just in case the twins decided to double-cross him.

"Ok then, Thundertail c'mon." Mudriver gestured for his sister to come over next to him.

All three of the cats dropped into ready poses. Mudriver and Thundertail were the first to move, coming at him in much the same way Tigerpaw and Thicketpaw had. Since there was no third cat to bring in a surprise attack, Darkpaw fearlessly rolled to the side and spun around to be ready to face them. The older cats landed next to each other and spun around as well. Mudriver rushed in on his own, but Darkpaw dodged him and struck out, missing his mark by a hair's width as Mudriver flinched away. Darkpaw quickly closed his eyes and luckily caught Thundertail's movement just before she landed on top of him. He hissed and swiped at the she-cat's face, but she met his swipe with her own and, being older and stronger, hers won out. Darkpaw was sent spinning into Mudriver and the tom quickly engaged him in a vicious wrestling match. Darkpaw kicked out and struggled knowing that if he got caught like this he was done for. Mudriver held tight to the apprentice's chest as Darkpaw kicked out. All the tabby could see was orange so he decided to open his eyes to see properly. Finally able to discern what part was what on his attacker Darkpaw sent a swipe over his shoulder and Mudriver pulled his face back to avoid it. This gave Darkpaw enough space to spin around and get his hind legs up to kick at the tom's neck. Mudriver finally released his captive and Darkpaw flipped onto the ground. Mudriver was sent staggering back but Thundertail was ready for him. She sent a high swipe aimed to scrape the top of Darkpaw's head and throw him off-balance, but the tabby ducked and lept forward, slamming into the she-cat's stomach and sending her staggering back on her hind paws. Darkpaw stopped plowing forward and Thundertail dropped back onto all four paws only to be met with a hard swipe to the side of the face that caused her entire body to turn to the side slightly. Darkpaw prepared to spring for his "kill" but Mudriver wasn't about to let that happen. Darkpaw grunted as a hard swipe, similar to the one he had delivered to Thundertail, caught him in the side and had him rolling several times before coming to a stop.

"Fuck I forgot I was fighting two," he cursed.

Meanwhile, Thundertail and Mudriver had regained their wits and were currently advancing on him again. This time Darkpaw led the attack and sprang at Thundertail, determined to get the more skilled she-cat out of the way first. Mudriver cut him off by jumping in front of his sister and blocking the attack with a blow of his own, effectively knocking the little tabby out of the air and onto his back. Darkpaw quickly tried to roll out of the way as the mass of grey fur prepared to pin him down and finish him off, but a pair of black paws held him down by his shoulders. He naturally kicked his hind legs up and bit at the paws, but they didn't release him before Mudriver was upon him. Due to the position of Darkpaw's hind legs, Mudriver's jaws were blocked from the tabby's little neck. Improvising, Mudriver took both the kit's legs in his jaws and yanked him out of Thundertail's grip. With a quick jerk of Mudriver's head, Darkpaw was slammed on his stomach with his legs still trapped in his mentor's mouth. He focused on freeing his legs and probably could have if Thundertail hadn't been there. The kit froze as he felt the she-cat's teeth scrape the back of his neck over the vulnerable part of his spine that could end his life instantly. Mudriver released his apprentice along with his sister.

"Nice job, Darkpaw. I thought it would be easier than that but you proved me wrong," Mudriver panted.

"Yeah, you sure put up quite a fight. I thought I would be out for sure when you landed that hit to my cheek," Thundertail agreed also panting.

Darkpaw groaned and regained his footing, unsteadily at first. "Thanks guys," he said, turning around to face the siblings. "Can we go again after a short break?" he asked hopefully.

"That's fine with me. You up for it, Thundertail?" Mudriver asked turning to his sister.

"Sure," she said with a loud yawn and stretch. Several of her bones cracked and she sighed in relief as she relaxed the position.

"If you don't mind me asking, why are you so interested in this all of a sudden?" Mudriver asked turning to his apprentice once again.

"I dunno I just figured I should know about it," the little tabby answered with a shrug. Again, it was partly true. Being able to fight an uneven battle was useful information to a warrior and it might come in handy when Tigerpaw would undoubtedly attack him again, but there was also another reason that Darkpaw would not dare tell even Mudriver about.

"Does this have anything to do with Tigerpaw?" Thundertail asked seriously.

"Sorta," Darkpaw admitted.

"Don't let that asshole get you down, Darkpaw. You'll be ten times the warrior he will ever be, especially with that gift of yours," Mudriver said, flicking the tip of his tail against the tabby's forehead.

"Thanks guys," Darkpaw said and achieved another grin.

"Great StarClan! Twice in two days! Bite me I'm dreaming," Mudriver exclaimed dramatically at seeing his apprentice "smile" again. "Yowch!" he yowled as his sister's jaws clamped around his tail.

"Nope, you're awake," Thundertail said with a grin of her own.

"Thundertail I didn't mean it literally," he brother whined.

"Oh shut up, are we gonna go again or not?" the she-cat said rolling her eyes.

All of the cats stopped as a low growl sounded thru the clearing. Mudriver and Thundertail looked at Darkpaw who gave them a highly embarrassed look.

"I, uh, haven't eaten since I took care of Runningnose," he admitted. The siblings gave him a disapproving look and he starred at an invisible bug at his paws.

"I'm hungry too," Thundertail said.

"I'll get us something," Mudriver offered.

"No, I'm a better hunter than you, I'll do it," Thundertail shot him down.

"I could-"

"Stay," the siblings ordered together, stopping Darkpaw from completing his offer.

"Sheesh he nearly beats the shit outta us and that was without even eating! We're gonna die now," Mudriver said dramatically again and nudged his apprentice.

Darkpaw swelled at the praise and looked back up. He was probably right. With the added energy boost from food, he would be much faster and stronger. And if he were using his claws, he probably would have come damn close to shredding the older cats in their last fight. The kittypets didn't stand a chance.

Thundertail returned shortly after with two squirrels and a mouse. Darkpaw chose one of the squirrels since it had been the last killed (though there wasn't much space between the kill times) and he hopped the squirrel's energy might transfer to him. Mudriver took the other squirrel, leaving Thundertail with the mouse, not that she minded.

After the meal and a little digestion time, Mudriver and his sister paired up again. They spent a long time fighting, resting, and then fighting again. Darkpaw was improving greatly and was starting to be capable of taking at least one of them out (usually Mudriver) before he was taken out. A little while before sun-high, Darkpaw decided it was time he started making his way to his appointment.

"I think that's enough for today. I'm gonna go hunting," the little tabby said after "killing" Mudriver only to be "killed" by Thundertail once again.

"Ok then. I better get back for my patrol anyway," Mudriver said coming back to life.

"We'll see you later, Darkpaw," Thundertail said and walked with her brother back into the briars.

Darkpaw nodded a 'goodbye' to them and waited until they were out of sight. As soon as they were, he took off in the direction of the designated meeting place.

With a still-full belly, Darkpaw reached the place at the correct time despite having exerted himself earlier and running almost the entire way. He panted for a little while before reaching top condition once again.

"We thought you would come," J.T. said stepping forward with his brother.

Darkpaw checked the surrounding area quickly. The trees were thin here, but he still didn't trust the twins. Finding it secure, he opened his eyes to look back at the brothers. "Well are you going to take me or not?" he asked curtly.

"Yes, come," T.J. said and Darkpaw once again followed behind the toms.

They led him out of the trees and into a clearing where a solitary two-leg nest stood. Darkpaw's anxiety grew slightly but he continued to follow behind the black and white tails. They took him behind the nest where a smaller nest stood. It was more crudely built and was in poor shape. Darkpaw was led inside to find it almost completely dark. It was uncomfortably hot and filled with strange two-leg things. He lost sight of the black tail for a moment but his eyes soon adjusted. They led him to the back of the structure where there was an empty space and they finally stopped. T.J. motioned for Darkpaw to sit between them which he did cautiously.

"Mother, we brought him," J.T. said.

Darkpaw was startled. He had smelt the light scent of a she-cat, but he hadn't known she was in here. His fur bristled but he forced it down. A small she-cat dropped in front of them from a pile of two-leg rubbish. Her left eye was green and the right was blue. Darkpaw glanced up to look at T.J. and J.T.'s eyes and was surprised to find that T.J. had green eyes while J.T. had deep blue ones.

The she-cat stepped into a small ring of light and Darkpaw got a better look at her coloring, or rather, lack of it. The she-cat was completely white to the point she almost glowed. Her collar was a dark red that stood out harshly against her pelt. One thing that confused Darkpaw about this kittypet and her sons was that they all had several scars like they had been in many battles, but that was not what Darkpaw expected from a kittypet. From what he knew, they had easy lives under the care of two-legs and were normally docile, but then, T.J. and J.T. had already proven that that could be false.

"Yes, you were right in your description, he does look strong, and his eyes show hardship, as well as something special. What is your name, little one?" she asked. Her voice was low and haunting yet calming at the same time so Darkpaw was terribly confused on how to react and, as usual, responded with anger.

"What is _your_ name, kittypet," he spat.

The she-cat merely flicked her tail in amusement. "I am Lynn, the overseer of the things that happen in the ring," she said softly.

Darkpaw saw no other alternative if this she-cat appeared to pose no threat so simply sighed and relaxed once again. "My name is Darkpaw. I am a ShadowClan apprentice…and the son of Darkstripe," he said slowly.

Lynn nodded in approval. "A fitting name for you, don't you think so, Shadow?"

A solid black massive tom stepped out of the shadows and stood beside Lynn.

Darkpaw, tired of surprises, took a survey of the structure to ensure he had at last met everyone he was going to meet for now. Shadow proved to be the last one.

"I do," he said. His eyes were the same as Lynn's only reversed and he was covered in more scars than the rest. One scar ran from his right ear, which was torn in half and extended over, stopping just above his left eye. He wore no collar and was obviously neither a kittypet nor a clan cat leaving Darkpaw to believe he must be a rouge.

"This is my mate," Lynn explained though Darkpaw had already assumed that.

"So he has a promising look, but can he prove himself?" Shadow questioned. His deep voice was similar to the gravely one of his son J.T.

"He can, Father, let us show you," T.J. said.

"Very well, let us go see what this kit is capable of," Lynn said. Without another word, she stood up and walked out of the structure via a small hole at the back. Shadow followed his mate and Darkpaw was urged thru after them soon to be joined by the twins. They walked into the trees that surrounded the nest in the back of the area. They walked quietly and all the time Darkpaw was thinking only one thing.

"_What is 'the ring'?"_

His question was soon answered as they went down a shallow dip and entered an area almost the size of the ShadowClan camp without any dens. A circle of dry, sharp briars formed a large ring in the center and smaller rings of stones filled with burn wood surrounded it widely. At opposite ends of the ring were covered box-shaped things. Darkpaw was led into the center of "the ring" and could see into the boxes. The fronts of the boxes were bars and the walls appeared to be the same thing underneath the cloth covering them. What surprised Darkpaw was that inside one of the boxes was a calico about his size. She jumped at the front bars upon seeing him, screeching and growling in frustration as the bars held her back. Darkpaw stepped back at seeing this display but hissed in return.

"Who is that," he growled. Before he smelled that she was a female, his first instinct had been to think it was Speckledpaw.

"That is Ginger. She is an apprentice too, but for something different than you. Do you think you could beat her in a fight?" Lynn asked him.

Despite her apparently vicious nature, Darkpaw had confidence that he could beat her and nodded.

"Confident, that's good. Get him in the crate," Lynn ordered.

Darkpaw was caught off-guard as the twins grabbed him and began dragging him to the empty box. He immediately began to panic but forced himself to calm down and at least be able to think while he struggled. "Let me go," he grunted almost managing to break away but getting pulled back.

"It's alright, Darkpaw, we are not going to hurt you. We will let you out very soon. This is how the fight will start every time if Mother and Father are pleased with your performance. You just go in here and after you are introduced we will release you, I promise," T.J. soothed.

Darkpaw reluctantly stopped struggling and allowed the toms to put him in the crate and lock him in via a latch on the door. Darkpaw started to realize why this was the choice way to start a fight. All the while he was in there he could only think about getting out and punishing someone, _anyone_, for being placed in here. He paced around and barely listened to Lynn as she pretended to introduce him to a large audience. Lynn was the last one in the ring. T.J. was at Darkpaw's crate, holding his paw ready to release the little tabby as soon as the order was given and J.T. was the same way over at Ginger's crate. Darkpaw discovered that he could reach his paw out and swipe at T.J.'s leg, but chose not to. That would be the key to his release and he did not want to give away his agitated emotions to Ginger.

Ginger was not paying attention. She had been locked in here for too long. All day! They had woken her up and brought her here. She had come willingly. She always came willingly. When they led her here it meant a fight and fighting was all she could think about. Since she was a little kit Shadow, Lynn, and her parents, Nina and Clash, had filled her mind with thoughts of fighting. It was all she wanted to do, and so, she had entered her crate quietly when they opened it. But then the door closed and she knew what came next. The madness set in. She had to get out! _'Escape! Hurt! Fight' _was all she could think about. She knew she would not be fighting the black and white cats, but the tabby was her prey! She would get a hold of him and tear him to pieces. They had put him in the crate. Yes! He was hers! J.T. put his paw up, ready to release her, but not doing it. She hissed in frustration and reached thru the bars to urge him to get on with it, but he didn't. He waited as Lynn spoke. They always waited! She was tired of waiting! Lynn exited the ring. Yes! This was it. The latch was pulled back and she burst thru the door. FREE!!! Yes now she was free! And someone would pay…

**I took a little longer than I had intended to in updating but I was busy, sorry. Just so you know, Darkpaw's violent side will be showing a lot more now and the violence will be bumped up significantly.**


	10. Chapter 9

Darkpaw was feeling increasingly claustrophobic inside of the crate. He could not see anything accept what was directly ahead of him, and that was Ginger's crate. Her anxious behavior was transferring to him even from this distance. He forced himself to remain calm but seeing the little she-cat's desperation was making it difficult on him. Every sound was amplified as his vision blurred. He didn't know what to call this except torture. There was his freedom, right in front of him, but he could not get it. And so, he waited at the back of the crate, watching. They would open it, he knew, and then there would be hell to pay. His breathing became louder and he could feel his heart pounding against his ribcage like it was as desperate to escape its prison as he was to escape his.

Lynn left the ring. This must be it. He would be freed. And sure enough, with a clang, the crate door was unlatched and yanked open. He dashed out, his happiness at being free quickly getting replaced with anger. Anger that he had been made to suffer like that. But he did not have time to target the specific ones who were responsible for this, so he went for the next option. Directly in front of him, flying at him with blinding speed and fury, was a small calico streak. She shrieked like a demon as she ran but everything seemed to be in slow-motion for the tabby.

Ginger swiped at her target, but he was gone. In her rabid, crazed state, she spun around looking for him. He was waiting for her. Directly behind her, the little tabby sat grinning in a way that made her blood run cold. How he had gotten there, she did not know, but she shook off her confusion and prepared to strike him down, but he was ready. Four claws raked her face before she could deliver her blow and she spun back. Pain, blood, anger. Ginger snapped her head back around to look at the tabby. He would pay now. He might even die. It all depended on how far Lynn and Shadow would let her go.

Darkpaw grinned at the she-cat. She was not part of his clan. No one knew what was happening. He could hurt her. He could show that he was powerful. He could show that no one could beat him down. He was the best and they would see his skills for what they were: strength. Already, she had spilled blood. Darkpaw had never spilled blood in a fight. He couldn't remember ever bleeding. This she-cat could not say the same.

Darkpaw stopped her next attack with his front paw's and used his sleek body and speed to his advantage and twisted under her body. His sharp fangs contacted with her soft stomach and this time he did not stop himself from snapping them shut. She shrieked and Darkpaw could taste blood, her blood. It ran over his fangs and into his mouth, coating his rough tongue with her taste. It was much different from prey's blood. The flavor was not as appealing and he released her shortly after causing the wound.

Ginger hissed and staggered back. This tabby hurt. He was hurting her a lot. And it was his time to pay! Calling on as much sanity as she had left, Ginger rushed to the side of the ring.

This threw Darkpaw off. Why was she going that way? He was over here. He turned to watch her but she swerved back around suddenly and almost caught a blow on his face. Had he not pulled back suddenly it would have taken out his eye. Darkpaw hissed and smashed his paw against the side of her face again irritating the marks he had already left and tearing them wider. It also forced Ginger's body to turn to the side and Darkpaw instantly took over this opportunity. He wrapped his front legs around her neck and prepared to bite down, but she was not done yet. Ginger flipped over with a hiss, driving the tabby head first into the hard packed earth. Darkpaw grunted as his body was pressed between his opponent and the ground. The calico growled in frustration to find that it was not enough to get the tabby to release his grip and struggled to stand back up as he tried to keep her down. Darkpaw tried to get a grip on her scruff, but she twisted in his grip so they were face to face. Not wanting to release his grip on his victim, Darkpaw held fast to the calico's neck and tried for her throat, but she would not have this. Ducking and swerving her head with jaws open and ready, Ginger blocked all of his attacks. Both kits were starting to realize that neither of them was gaining the upper paw in this tussle. There had to be a change. Ginger wanted this tom off of her and began clawing with all her might at his chest, but Darkpaw moved his hind legs backward to avoid her. This change in angle threw off the balance that was holding the two on their hind paws and Ginger managed to slip thru the tabby's weakened grip. She leaned over him and this time wrapped her front legs around his small waist, trying to rake his head with her hind claws while nipping his back. Darkpaw hissed in frustration and rolled over. As his writhing body landed on top of Ginger's, her grip loosened enough for him to twist onto his paws and rake at her head while digging his fangs once again into the flesh of her stomach. She hissed and batted his ears and head with her hind claws, trying to rip them up, but she could not reach to grip his too small, tight stomach flesh in her jaws. Sick of this, Darkpaw used all the strength he had to roll the she-cat onto her stomach. She immediately tried to slip out of his grip, but he dug his claws into her shoulders, stopping her movement. She hissed and tried to buck up against him, but there was nothing she could do. Darkpaw managed to get his jaws to the back of her neck and he prepared to snap them shut and end the she-cat's life.

Suddenly, all the weight was lifted from Ginger's form. Yes, she would not die today. Not this fight. She looked up and saw T.J. and J.T. restraining the tabby. It happened every time in apprentice battles and occasionally it true battles that there would not be a death. The winning cat would be yanked off or would leave the loser unconscious. Ginger had guessed that this match might not end in her death. Normally a death fight was in front of many cats, not just the leaders. But, while she would live to fight for at least for a few more hours, until the sun went down and the real fights started, she had lost and punishment for that would come at some time. She looked at the calming tabby and saw that, while she had struck him, no blood was produced from his body. She wasn't even sure if she had broken his skin significantly. What shocked her then was how quickly he had calmed down. Most victorious apprentices took forever to calm down, she still had difficulty with it and it was only her confusion that held her back from attacking him again even now.

Darkpaw sat quietly between T.J. and J.T. It had not taken long for the brothers to feel secure releasing him, but they continued to keep an eye on him and Ginger even as Lynn and Shadow approached. He would pose no more threat to the she-cat, for now, but his glare sent shivers of fear thru her body. His eyes were colder than ice as they sent her his dark message. _"I could have killed you. I would have killed you, but that will not be done, not yet. But it would have happened. You should be dead now, but you are not because you were saved. You just kissed death and if you face me again, you might do more."_

"Did he do well, Mother?" T.J. asked.

"Yes, he was quite fascinating to watch. I believe he does have the potential to dominate this ring if he so chooses," Lynn responded with an approving look down at Darkpaw. He was still glaring his murderous message to Ginger and if anything this made the white she-cat approve even more.

"What is this you told us of his ability to see without his eyes?" Shadow asked his sons.

This brought Darkpaw back to reality. He looked up at the older cats. Then the memory of his fight with the brothers came back to him. He would show them this skill too if the occasion so called for it.

"It is true, Father, this kit does not need his eyes to see. And without his eyes, he sees everything around him not just in front of him," J.T. said.

"Is that so? Well we shall need to see this skill in action. Would you agree to that, Darkpaw?" the large black tom asked, though it didn't really sound like a question, more like a test.

"Yes," Darkpaw said simply. He glanced back at Ginger. Despite nearly being killed, the calico hissed angrily at him.

Lynn smirked at the two kits. "Ginger, go back to your mother and father. I will tell them of this later," she said. Ginger stifled another shiver and took off into the trees with a nod.

"What will happen to her?" Darkpaw inquired. He didn't really care about his former opponent, but he was curious.

"She will most likely not discuss what happened here on her own, so technically nothing until I tell her parents. When that happens, she will be punished. A simple exercise to increase her strength. We will show you later if you wish, but now, show us this gift of yours," the white she-cat ordered. She flicked her tail and T.J. and J.T. nodded before making their way to the crate Ginger had previously inhabited.

Darkpaw knew where this was going. He turned and walked back to his crate. He stepped in and this time it was Shadow who locked him in. Darkpaw saw that both the juvenile toms were crammed in the same crate. He knew how much this enclosed space drove him mad, he could imagine the torment that must come from having even less space and another body with him and they were both bigger than he was.

Sure enough, the brothers were starting to turn on each other. T.J. was on his belly hissing and swiping at J.T. while the white tom swiped at his brother. The two finally got their wits back as their mother unlatched their crate in synchrony with Shadow opening Darkpaw's. J.T. was the first one to burst thru the door with his darker brother right behind him.

Darkpaw lept out of his small container and back out into the open area. He had a feeling that this fight was not to end in death either, but he could act like it would. The brothers rushed him first and he stood ready, closing his eyes and waiting. The orange forms did not go straight for him, but instead rushed to the sides. Cleaver, he could not go for both of them at the same time as they rushed in to hit him from the sides. He spun around so he was facing J.T.'s attack. J.T. kept low while Darkpaw sensed T.J. jumping, planning to stop his escape if he chose to try to jump over the white tom. But that was not the tabby's plan. He ducked low and met J.T.'s attack head-on. With a quick jerk, J.T. was placed right where his brother was landing.

"Watch it!" J.T. hissed as his brother's claws dug into his back.

"Sorry," T.J. apologized jumping off his twin.

J.T. struggled to get his shoulders out of the kit's grip, but every move he made caused the claws to dig deeper into his flesh. T.J. took this chance to go for Darkpaw's exposed neck, but the kit was still watching him. Darkpaw rolled onto his back, ripping his claws out of J.T.'s skin, and swiped at T.J.'s face, forcing the black tom back. J.T. took his turn to try and take out the little tabby, but Darkpaw flipped back onto his paws and smacked his paw to the tom's face, causing him to turn his head and expose his neck. Darkpaw lept forward and threatened the neck with his fangs. J.T. knew he had been beaten and dropped to the ground. Darkpaw allowed the tom to fall without causing real damage to him. T.J. made his presence known, jumping at Darkpaw over his brother. The ShadowClan apprentice quickly rolled onto his back and allowed the black tom to land on top of him, but before he could blink, the tabby's fangs were pricking his throat. Darkpaw had pulled the same move he had used on Windpaw, and he had to admit he liked it. Darkpaw finally opened his eyes to see Shadow and Lynn approaching. He released their son and crawled out from under him to stand before the adults.

"Well done, kit. You would be a fine apprentice," Lynn praised, glancing at her sons as they stood up and walked over.

"I told you, Mother," T.J. said proudly but received a harsh blow from said she-cat. J.T. stood still as he received the same treatment.

"Yes you were right," Lynn said. She looked down and saw Darkpaw's confused and suprised look. "They are not apprentices anymore, hence they will not be punished in the way Ginger will be, but I am still their mother and may do as I wish," she hissed looking back at her sons who hung their heads.

"You see, kit, loosing is frowned upon here. It normally ends in death. Should you choose to become an apprentice, you will need to come to terms with that," Shadow said.

Darkpaw nodded. "But what would being an apprentice here mean?" Darkpaw asked. He knew what being a ShadowClan apprentice meant, but he had a feeling these cats worked with a different system.

"It's simple really. You will come every night to battle with other cats. True ringfighters. But you will not be required to take their life, simply knock them out or go in for a kill-shot and don't carry it out like you did with my sons. In the event you lose and the other cat gets the upper paw on you, you will be allowed to die. If you can survive your fights and you feel you are ready, come to Shadow or I and tell us that you wish to attempt to take a life and your next fight will be to the death on both fronts. You may practice against other apprentices and that will not end in a death either way but other than that, anything is allowed. It is dangerous and sometimes lethal, but if you survive and become a true ringfighter, you will be known as one of the most powerful and skilled fighters ever known," Lynn finished explaining and watched the sharp glint in the tabby's eyes.

The most powerful fighter ever known. Even stronger than a ShadowClan warrior. Yes, he wanted this. He wanted to show he was the best and what better way than by force. They all would see he was truly the most powerful. He demanded respect. Whether they gave it willingly or he took it by force was their choice.

"Before you make your decision, young one, come to see our battle tonight. See just how dangerous your life will become, but also see just how great. No one is forcing you into this world, but the door is open. The cats you will see are like Ginger only more vicious. Since the day they came or were brought to us, they have thought of nothing but to fight and kill. Not their families, not their friends, not even about pain. They come here to fight to end the internal pain, the pain they cannot see or understand. They make the pain come out, turn it into something they can see and understand, and it leaves them until the next time they choose to come. Do you understand?" Lynn asked.

Darkpaw nodded. Yes he understood. He understood the strange pain. The pain he never saw, but he always felt. He made it go away with his treasure. He had always imagined he had made his pain flow into it and the pain would then radiate off of it and caused him to realize the agony that would then reenter him and become the agony in his leg muscles, an agony he could understand. What these cats were doing was no different, but they were transferring their pain to other beings with tooth and claw. Their opponent would not only be forced to feel their attacker's pain, but also their own. Darkpaw's claws extended at the thought and his fur tingled. He would come tonight, and he would see this vicious dance of pain and blood and he would join this world and revile his pain and agony to it and he would see just how strong this world was and if it could handle him, all of him. Unlike his clan, these cats were strong and bathed in pain, they could handle it for they fed off of it from themselves and each other and then they mastered it. Yes, he would master it and conquer the weaker beings.

"When?" he asked raising his blazing eyes to the she-cat's mismatched ones.

Lynn smirked down at the tabby. "Moon high tonight, you will meet J.T. and T.J. in the same place you met them earlier. They have told me you live with the forest cats. Will you be able to get away from your clan?"

"I'll do it," he said firmly.

"Good, go now and we will see you if you come tonight," she said.

"Goodbye," Darkpaw said, dipping his head to the older cats. They nodded in return and he ran back the way he had come.

Once again, he ran the entire way back to camp, pausing to hunt occasionally to make it look like he had been doing something other than wander around the territory. He stopped and rolled in several fragrant plants to cover the odor of his new acquaintances knowing there would be hell to pay if he was caught with their scent. He walked back into camp as the sun set, leaving only pink streaks across the sky.

"There you are, jeez where have you been, kit?!" Mudriver yowled as Darkpaw walked away from the fresh kill pile with his selected piece for Runningnose.

"Just got caught up in the forest. It's nice out there, quiet…solitary. You should try it," Darkpaw said thru gritted teeth with a shrug and continued on his way to the elders' den.

"Well I was just worried. I haven't seen Tigerpaw around and I thought he might have gone after you," Mudriver explained walking next to his apprentice.

"If he did, he sucks at tracking," Darkpaw snorted as he entered the den. "Sorry I'm a little late today," Darkpaw apologized to the lone elder.

"It's fine. I won't be needing anything else tonight," Runningnose said.

Darkpaw nodded and stepped back out. The grey form of his mentor was getting harder to see in the darkness. He looked around and saw only a few cats had yet to go to sleep. Excellent, the more of them that were asleep, the easier it would be to sneak out. His coloring already gave him a good chance, couple that with the few drowsy cats that might still be awake at that hour and his silence and his escape would be almost too easy.

Darkpaw's fur tingled as he felt like someone was glaring at him. He turned in the direction of the apprentices' den and saw the glowing eyes that belonged to the other tabby apprentice. He said goodnight to Mudriver and made his way over, holding his head and tail up in a clear show of confidence and dominance.

"Like what you see?" he growled at the larger tabby.

"I'd prefer seeing an old rat than a rouge," Tigerpaw growled back raising his body from its previous crouching position to glare down at the silver and black tom.

"How'd you like to see your pansy ass ancestors," Darkpaw snarled extending his claws.

"Watch your tongue, bastard, or I'll rip it out of your thick skull," Tigerpaw warned his fur standing on end, making his already massive body grow even larger.

Darkpaw knew he would have a disadvantage in a fight right now. He had been fighting and running all day while only eating a single squirrel. Sheathing his claws, he spat at Tigerpaw and pushed past him to curl up in his nest, but the orange tabby wasn't done. He walked over and bent down until he was almost nose to nose with his rival apprentice.

"The den reeked of rouge today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that, would you?" the older tom hissed.

"I don't know, maybe you should wash yourself more often," Darkpaw retorted.

"Why you little…" Tigerpaw swung at Darkpaw's head with the full intention of knocking him out, but he was startled to find that Darkpaw not only blocked the blow, but also landed a scratch right across the orange cat's face. Tigerpaw hissed and staggered back from the now standing, growling kit. Tigerpaw felt his face and realized Darkpaw had drawn the smallest amount of blood with his thorn-like claws. "You better watch your worthless back, Darkstripe," he warned before retreating back into the apprentices' den.

"I always do," Darkpaw growled so softly Tigerpaw did not hear him. He lay back down in his nest and curled up but kept his frozen eyes wide open.

The rest of the camp slowly retreated back into the warriors' den save a couple cats guarding the entrance. Darkpaw stayed where he was, knowing no one could see him thanks to the placement of his nest, but he could see them. They never once looked in his direction as he waited for the right moment to dash out. Just before moon-high, Darkpaw cautiously rose from his nest, double checking to make sure everyone save the guards were asleep. Once satisfied, he fixed his gaze on a point in the brush where there was a small hole that his small body could just fit thru. He crouched down, preparing his spring-loaded legs for the jump. At the right time, he released the pin that held his muscles ready and his legs launched him thru the brush and into the forest with almost no noise. Darkpaw paused to make sure no one had noticed or come to investigate. One of the guards' ears twitched but he didn't seem bothered so Darkpaw made his noiseless way back to the edge of the territory.

"You always have pinpoint accurate timing, dark one," T.J. said as Darkpaw approached confidently.

At first the address had confused the kit, but he shrugged it off. "I know," he said with a smirk.

"Your confidence knows no bounds," J.T. commented.

"Yes yes I know, now show me this battle your mother was talking about," Darkpaw ordered.

"First, she has told us to show you what has become of Ginger," T.J. said.

"Yes follow us," J.T. said and the two turned in unison and led Darkpaw in a slightly off direction from the ring.

Darkpaw could not see the ring, but he could hear the sounds of fighting and many cats talking and shouting. There was light coming from that direction. This confused Darkpaw, but he would see that soon enough. T.J. and J.T. led him thru the trees until they reached a tall pine. The trunk and low branches of the tree was covered in scratches. T.J. and J.T. began climbing effortlessly into the branches.

"Come on," T.J. urged and Darkpaw quickly followed.

They continued climbing higher and higher. Darkpaw glanced down and realized he had never been this high in a tree before and they were still climbing! When Darkpaw began to think they would not stop until they reached the very top, the twins climbed out onto one of the branches. They stood on either side of a pair of calico paws clinging desperately to the tree. Darkpaw looked down and saw Ginger hanging there with a mixture of anger and pain on her face and she dug her claws into the branch to hold on tighter. He was shocked and fascinated by this strange and barbaric punishment.

"You see, in the event you challenge another apprentice and you loose, you will be sent here to the tree of strength and pain. While the pain will punish you, this strain will strengthen your legs and help you so you might not loose again," J.T. explained.

T.J. leaned down and grabbed Ginger by the scruff of her neck and helped her pull herself back onto the branch to join them. "Come on, young ones, we should get back to the battle," he said and led the way back down the tree.

Once they had all dropped to the ground they made their way towards the noise and light. Darkpaw looked down into the small valley that occupied the ring and was shocked by what he saw…


	11. Chapter 10

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Sierra- tortoiseshell she-cat. Ringfighter**

**Rook- long-haired cream and black she-cat with blue eyes. Ringfighter**

**Crys- brown and black tabby tom with a black mask around his eyes. Ringfighter apprentice. Son of Crash and Luca and brother of Tears**

**Tears- grey and brown tabby tom with white underbelly and a white tear-shaped mark on his back. Ringfighter apprentice. Son of Crash and Luca and brother of Crys**

**Luca- orange tabby she-cat with amber eyes. Ringfighter. Mother of Crys and Tears and mate of Crash**

**Crash- black tom with a white mark on his chest and pale green eyes. Father of Crys and Tears and mate of Luca**

_Darkpaw looked down into the valley that occupied the ring and was shocked by what he saw…_

More cats than he had ever seen were down in the clearing, cheering and shouting as the two cats currently in the ring fought. The smaller rings of stone were now filled with burning wood and Darkpaw was perplexed as to how these cats had managed it. Cats ranging from all ages from a moon or two younger than he was to older than Blackstar and all of them had the same violent, blood-thirsty look in their blazing eyes, lit up by the fire. The cats in the center seemed oblivious to the shouts coming from the crowd and were intent on ripping their opponent's throat out.

"Come this way, my dark little friend, and you will be able to see better. Do not show fear or worry for the cats here will not accept such feelings of weakness," T.J. said quietly to Darkpaw.

"I will be with you shortly," J.T. promised and walked off towards the ring with Ginger.

"Where are they going?" Darkpaw asked as he followed T.J. to the other side of the ring.

"You will see soon enough," T.J. told him as they made their way thru the packed crowd of cats.

Darkpaw could nearly taste the aggression in the air. Even without closing his eyes, his gift was screaming that every cat here had only one desire: to cause blood and/or kill. It didn't matter what they did it to, they just had to do it. Remembering T.J.'s instructions, Darkpaw deadened all of his emotions and walked calmly behind the black tom. He was aware of the cats looking at him, but it was different from how ShadowClan looked at him. They were no more accepting, but they held neither loathing nor fear for him, simply curiosity and Darkpaw held the same for them.

T.J. stopped at a bare spot right on the edge of the ring. Darkpaw sat next to him and noticed Lynn and Shadow were on T.J.'s left. They nodded a greeting to their son and the kit before looking back at the battling cats. Darkpaw looked to his right and saw another spot and guessed that was where J.T. would occupy. Sure enough, the white tom pushed thru the crowd and sat next to the apprentice.

"Where is Ginger?" Darkpaw asked.

"You will see her soon," J.T. whispered so only Darkpaw could hear.

Figuring he might as well just wait, Darkpaw turned back to the brawl. Curious, Darkpaw closed his eyes and sniffed. After managing to get thru the excitement around him, he realized that the two were both female and the younger one was going downhill fast. Darkpaw opened his eyes and saw that it was the tortoiseshell who was being slapped around by the much bigger she-cat. The older one had long cream colored fur with black on her tail, face, and legs. A few scars were visible on her face but her long coat kept the rest of the scars hidden.

The tortoiseshell cried out as the other she-cat slashed her face again and then lunged forward to bite the younger she-cats neck. The tortoiseshell kicked out desperately with her hind claws, trying to rake the belly of her attacker, but the older one's size and long coat kept her from being injured. In a fit of desperation, the younger one batted and bit at the cream one's head, but it was too late. She was running out of air and had lost a dangerous amount of blood. It was not long before the torte's green eyes glazed over and she lay still.

"She's dead," Darkpaw said as he opened his eyes.

"Yes, it seems young Sierra couldn't stand up to the much older and wiser Rook. It's a pity, really. Sierra had so much talent, but I suppose she just didn't have what it takes to survive against such a vicious opponent. If the time ever comes that you must face Rook, know that if you do not kill her, she can and will kill you without hesitation even if you are just a kit," J.T. said looking down seriously at the tabby.

Darkpaw looked back at the ring and saw that Lynn had traveled into it to meet Rook. She looked down at the fallen torte and sniffed her before looking back up at the crowd.

"Sierra has been slain. The victor is Rook," Lynn announced. There was a myriad of yowls and screeches from the crowd. Rook dipped her head and walked out of the ring with a smirk on her face. "Now, earlier today my sons brought me a kit from the forest," Lynn said after the noise had died down.

Darkpaw was startled as T.J. and J.T. urged him forward and walked with him to the center of the ring to meet their mother. The toms suddenly picked him up and Darkpaw let out a yowl of surprise. They held him in front of the crowd with T.J. holding his scruff and J.T. gripping his hind legs and pulling them as far as they would stretch behind him. Darkpaw hissed at being displayed in such an uncomfortable and awkward manner. The twins carried him around the ring so all the spectators could see him. They looked critically down at him and he growled and bared his teeth at them, this seemed to gain him some approval. After making a couple of laps, the brothers set him down gently back in front of Lynn and took seats on either side of the white she-cat. Darkpaw immediately sprang up and looked menacingly at the crowd, extending his claws in a dare for someone to approach him but none did.

"I decided to test this young tabby by having him battle our young apprentice, Ginger," Lynn said. She began to circle Darkpaw closely, pressing her small white body against him and rubbing her tail against his neck and cheek. Darkpaw growled at the she-cat's actions, but she ignored him. "This young tabby is quite talented and did manage to defeat young Ginger, hence I have invited him here so that he may better understand our society and decide if he would like to join us. I am sure you would all like to see what this young tom has, correct?" Lynn said.

Immediately, the entire place erupted with yowls of agreement. Darkpaw was unsure of how to take this so he simply kept his stance and expression. Then he remembered that there were still several cats behind him. He spun around quickly, delivering the same challenge to this side.

"That's what I thought, but now is not the time for that for he has yet to make his decision. Right now we must reprimand a certain young she-kit who lost her most recent battle," Lynn reminded them.

T.J. and J.T. led Darkpaw back to their place and he noticed several cats had begun looking at him again. He looked up at them coldly, snatching them in his icy glare and extended his claws. Then something happened that he had not expected: several of them nodded! As if he had passed some sort of test. He shook it off and looked back at the ring. Lynn had walked off and was once again sitting beside T.J.

"What's happening?" Darkpaw asked T.J.

"So many questions, little kit, watch and you will see," T.J. told him.

Darkpaw sighed and turned back to the ring. He heard the familiar noise of Ginger hissing and saw her calico leg darting out of the bars to express her displeasure to the tom holding her cage. Then he heard something that nearly made him jump into a tree. It was a sound he had never heard before and something in him told him to be frightened. It was a loud, short, deep noise that rang out thru the clearing. Then a loud rattling type sound would be heard then more of the strange, sharp noise. The rattling almost sounded like a growl, but nothing Darkpaw had ever heard from a cat.

'_What the fuck is that?' _Darkpaw thought as the noise continued. He saw several of the larger cats, including Rook and Shadow, stationed around the ring all looking ready for a fight.

Ginger's cage was pulled open and the kit burst out growling at the creature she was set to face. Darkpaw found this strange. He had thought the crates were always opened at the same time. It seemed only fair, but he could also tell that this was not a normal fight. Whatever Ginger was facing was not a cat.

Darkpaw closed his eyes and tried to tell what the thing was. The life signature was a dark red color that Darkpaw did not recognize and its shape confused him as well. It was larger than even the biggest cat he had ever seen and its tail seemed stiffer. Its muzzle was long and its ears were only half up. What shocked Darkpaw even more was that his gift told him it wasn't very old, meaning it could still grow bigger. Darkpaw thought he would faint when he thought of this creature being even bigger.

The cage opened and the most formidable looking thing, next to a monster, that Darkpaw had ever seen jumped out. It bore it's huge, white fangs and Darkpaw noticed that its claws never retracted. All the other cats seemed unfazed by the creature and Ginger rushed at it head-on.

"What the fuck is that thing?!" Darkpaw whispered in shock.

"It's called a dog. They come in many different shapes and sizes and colors just like cats but they are even more diverse. There are some that only get to be a third of that ones size when they are fully grown and some get to be half the size of a monster," T.J. answered.

Darkpaw gaped at the furry brown creature that was snapping at Ginger as she swiped and its large black nose. Darkpaw could tell that if those teeth ever made contact, they could snap Ginger's paw off. It continued making its loud deep noise as its jaws snapped.

"What is that noise?" Darkpaw asked.

"Barking, it's the way dogs speak. We cannot understand it just like they cannot understand us but it always seems to make their two-legs come, but this one has no two-legs. You see he wears no collar like a kittypet," J.T. explained.

"And she has to kill it?" Darkpaw asked in disbelief.

"No of course not, she simply has to run it off," J.T. said.

Darkpaw looked in the direction of the crate the dog had come out of and saw that the cats there had moved to the side to allow an aisle for the dog to flee thru.

The dog suddenly targeted one of the cats standing guard but was swiftly batted back into the ring to face Ginger. The she-cat jumped onto the dog's back making it yelp in surprise. It rolled over but Ginger lept off before she could be crushed. It lowered its head and the fur on its neck stood on end as it bared its vicious fangs and growled. Darkpaw felt sickened by the trail of drool leaking from the dog's mouth. There didn't seem to be a single weak spot on the animal. Its thick fur and long, sharp fangs and claws seemed as formidable as anything Darkpaw could have imagined. Ginger lept and caught her claws on the dog's muzzle. It yelped and shook, causing the kit's claws to drag thru its skin and tear the flesh of its nose. It let out a cry as it backed up and shook again. It whimpered and began to lower then raise its body repeatedly then barked again with a yelp mixed in.

"This is it. Come with me," T.J. said and led Darkpaw into the throng of cats once again.

"What are we doing?" he asked as he pushed thru the large, scarred cats. T.J. did not answer but simply urged him to a spot right next to the aisle meant for the dog. "What are we doing here?" he asked looking around.

"When the dog runs thru, scratch at it," T.J. said.

Darkpaw wasn't entirely sure why they were doing this, but he knew he had wanted to know what it felt like to rake his claws thru the long brown fur and see what it was like to touch the invisible flesh of the strange animal.

Ginger hissed and raised herself onto the tips of her toes and arched her back. Her fur was all fluffed out. She hissed as she ran side-ways at the dog. The dog dropped into a bow and looked at her still barking. She charged again and it sprang up, taking off to its opening with its tail tucked between its hind legs as it whimpered.

"Get ready…now," T.J. said as the dog began to pass by.

Darkpaw struck out with his front claws. His claws raked thru the fur and he struck out again, this time making contact with thick, solid skin. The muscles of the animal rippled under Darkpaw's paw as it ran by. He quickly closed his eyes and sniffed. _Dog, male, young, healthy, frightened._ Darkpaw was shocked, the dog was covered with scratches that would have critically injured a small cat, but it was hardly even affected. Darkpaw shuddered at the thought of this dog being grown and facing them, not as a frightened baby, but an aggressive adult.

"Different than what you have faced before, right?" T.J. asked looking down at the tabby.

Darkpaw nodded. "But are they all as easy to defeat as that?" he asked looking at the claws he had used to graze the dog's skin.

"Oh no. That one was young. He was just a pup and frightened. Older and bigger dogs would not hesitate to rip any one of us to pieces, but even a pup is a formidable opponent given the chance," T.J. said.

Darkpaw nodded in agreement and followed the black tom back to J.T. and the others. Along the way, he could not get thoughts of the dog out of his head. Snaketail had told him stories about those creatures to frighten him, and they had. Darkpaw now decided that his staying concern about these beasts had been sensible, though they were not as fierce looking as Snaketail had described. While the pup had looked formidable, he doubted that even in its grown state it would be bigger than a tree and its paws were not large enough to crush him with one step nor were its eyes blood red. But Darkpaw was still curious about badgers and foxes but decided not to worry about it for now.

"Did you feel the dog?" Lynn asked as they approached.

"Yes," Darkpaw answered.

"What did you think of him?" she pressed.

"It was fierce, but not so that I could not have defeated it myself," Darkpaw said.

Lynn smiled as she usually did at his confidence. "So you would accept that as your punishment should you join us?"

"Of course, it seems more like an opportunity to display my skill and power to me," Darkpaw said coolly earning another smile from the white she-cat.

They said no more as many more fights took place in front of them. Lynn would leave the group to introduce the next fighters or announce the winner. Cat after cat fell or died before the young apprentice and he took it all in. He watched the strategies of each cat and thought about how he could apply those techniques. In all his excitement, Darkpaw did not even feel tired despite being up all night.

Then, something different happened. Two kits, younger than Darkpaw, entered the ring calmly. Their size made Darkpaw guess they were only around three or four moons of age. Both their eyes held a soft green gaze showing a slow transition to amber. One was a brown and black tabby tom. A mask of black fur surrounded his eyes and extended down the sides of his face. The other was a grey and brown tabby tom, his underbelly, neck, and chin a blazing white. What interested Darkpaw about the grey one's coloring was a small white spot in the center of the kit's back that stood out harshly against his dingy coat.

"What's going on? Who are they?" Darkpaw whispered to T.J.

"The brown and black one is named Crys and the other's name is Tears. They also are brothers and apprentices," T.J. explained.

The last bit surprised the young tabby. "Apprentices?! But they are so young," he hissed in shock.

"Not here they are not. They have left their mother's milk and they want to fight. Right now they are proving themselves to the others as you will have to do on occasion and as Ginger does."

Darkpaw could ask no more as Lynn's voice rang out thru the trees. "One week ago Crys and Tears requested to begin their training to join our ranks. They have not seen true battles with one of us yet due to their age, but they have started their climb in the ranks of apprentices and now they will give us their show of progress."

Darkpaw watched as the two kits were split up and ushered to their separate cages. Both of them were eager and difficult to manage as two grown cats led them in opposite directions. The she-cat leading Crys made a grab for his scruff and dragged him back as he tried to move to attack his brother. Tears then had to be calmed as he saw his brother's attack and prepared to retaliate. Finally, the two were locked in their crates to await the order for release. Tears lashed out at the cat holding his lock while Crys was attempting to squirm thru the bars. The doors were flung open and Tears raced out, but Crys now needed to pull himself out of the bars of his door. Laughter erupted from the crowed as the small kit struggled to free himself while his brother did not wait to attack.

Darkpaw imagined being in Crys's situation, trapped and mocked. The tabby's claws extended and a low growl escaped his throat. He was snapped back into reality as Crys's yowl rang out thru the clearing. Darkpaw looked and saw that Tears had grabbed some loose skin on his brother's back and torn him from the bars aggressively.

Crys yelped again as his brother began to drag him by the skin of his back into the center of the ring. Tears released him but swiftly started beating him about the head with his small claws. Crys tried futilely to bat his brother away but Tears had the upper paw and they both knew it. The crowed continued to laugh and it was beginning to hit Crys's mind as painfully as his brother's claws. Anger began to boil in the brown tabby. At first he was afraid of it, but then he realized what it was. The pain was what he was supposed to use. This was what he would transfer into his brother to make his attacks even stronger than the ones hitting him now. His brother was not feeling this pain so, while the attacks hurt, they were not as strong as they could be. With a shriek of anger, Crys lept up and slapped his brother's face forcefully with his paw.

Tears grunted as his head snapped to the side. He turned back to his panting brother in shock. Anger was pouring from the masked tabby so heavily that Tears felt he could taste it.

Darkpaw sensed it too, and he recognized it instantly. It was what he felt all the time, especially after his run-ins with Tigerpaw. The pain and anger of being humiliated, laughed at, treated like shit for another's amusement. It was an anger that could revert to hatred at any time and cause a cat to act in a wild and rabid way.

Crys shrieked again and launched himself at his stunned brother, knocking him backwards. Tears was too stunned to respond until his brother's first blow caught the side of his head, making his ears ring. He shook his head and blinked a few times as he gazed up at his brother. Crys snarled at struck another blow to Tears's head, making the slightly smaller tom yelp. With a hiss, he struck out at his brother's dark belly with his hind claws.

Tears and Crys had never fought before. They had always gotten along very well with a brotherly scuffle now and then, nothing like this. When they had heard that they would need to fight each other, they had imagined it would be easy. Tears had not minded rushing in like he had. He knew he had hurt his brother but he had done it before a couple of times in a normal brotherly fight. But now, he was supposed to keep hurting him as badly as he could. He hadn't really wanted to attack Crys like he had, but he was supposed to. And now, here was Crys, hurting him and not caring. Crys was getting angrier and angrier as he pounded his brother's head and scraped his claws down his brother's belly. Tears felt hurt, not only physically, but mentally. His brother was making him angry, very angry. Tears knew what he had to do. He fed this anger, letting it grow and hurt as he struck out against his brother. And finally, Tears dug his hind claws into Crys's underbelly and shoved the bigger tom off.

Crys grunted as he stumbled back and Tears righted himself. Pale green met pale green as their eyes locked. One of them had to go down and neither of them was willing to do it. They were tired, but they were also angry and their anger towards their sibling kept them from collapsing. With a roar of anger, Tears rushed at the masked tabby, claws fully unsheathed. Crys crouched and prepared to spring out of the way of the attack, but Tears's speed was more than he had expected and tiny claws raked his shoulder before he could make his escape. Crys cried out in pain and was thrown off balance, crashing to the ground completely exhausted and unable to work up the will to stand again. Tears prepared to rush in and attack his brother again, but jaws clamped shut around the nape of his neck and he hung limply from the jaws of a grown she-cat. He recognized the scent as Luca, his mother and the one who had led Crys to his crate. Their father, Crash, walked over and picked up his other son gently as Lynn entered the ring.

"Tears is victorious over his brother," the white she-cat announced as several cheers erupted from the crowd.

Tears looked over at his half-conscious brother dangling in his father's jaws. Crys slowly opened his eyes to half-mast to gaze back. The pale green of the kits' eyes met once more before they closed once again to engulf them in darkness.

"Will Crys be punished?" Darkpaw asked.

"Yes, but only with a visit to the tree. He is still too small to be expected to run off a dog," J.T. said.

Finally, dawn was close by and Lynn announced that the time had come for the fighters to disperse. The cats cleared out quickly so that in only a matter of minutes it was as though they had never been there. The fires had all died down and only a few had some weak smoke flowing from them. Lynn approached Darkpaw as the last of the cats left, leaving them alone with the twins and Shadow.

"Did you enjoy tonight, kit?" the white she-cat asked.

Darkpaw nodded then yawned as the realization of how tired he was hit him. He could scarcely keep his eyes open. He shook his head hard to try and get rid of the cobwebs of sleep, but being so drowsy caused him to become dizzy and he collapsed.

Lynn smirked down at him and turned to Shadow. The black tom nodded and set a bundle of strange smelling herbs before the exhausted kit. Darkpaw sniffed it then gave the grown cats a confused look.

"It's catnip. Eat some and you will have enough energy to get back to your clan," Lynn explained.

Darkpaw sniffed again and recognized the herb as something he had seen in Littlecloud's den. He had gotten it for Snaketail and Runningnose on various occasions. He knew he was going back to training today and if he was tired, Mudriver would definitely notice. Darkpaw took some of the herb and soon started feeling energy flow thru him. His eyes opened back up and he stood up quickly. He glanced at the horizon and realized dawn was not far off.

"I have to go," he said.

"Wait, you smell of us, come over here," T.J. said and led the tabby to a strong smelling fern.

Darkpaw took the hint and quickly rolled in it, covering up the smell of the other cats with the sweet plant. Once he was satisfied, he got back up and shook.

"If you choose to join us, come when you are ready. It does not matter when, we will always be ready for you," Lynn said.

Darkpaw dipped his head to the older cats and took off back to his territory. This trip went quicker than the others had since he did not have to stop and hunt, but thirst was plaguing him. He quickly tracked down a small stream on the territory and drank thankfully from it. Once he was quenched, he took off once again back to camp, terrified that he would be spotted. This terror seemed to do something to his body as he nearly flew over the ground. He plunged back thru the hole he had escaped out of, landing perfectly in his nest and curled up. He did his best to stop panting and slow his heart as the last minutes of night ticked away and the sun began to peek over the mountains.

_

Darkpaw was surprised to find that he was being woken up. He groaned and opened his eyes. It was too bright to be dawn, but sun high clearly hadn't happened yet. The sun was barely past where it would have been if it were dawn, but the other apprentices and the dawn patrol had already departed.

"Hey, sorry, buddy, I slept in a bit," Mudriver apologized.

"It's ok I don't mind," Darkpaw yawned as he did a massive stretch.

"So are you ready to go hunting?" the grey warrior asked.

"Um, I was wondering if we could do some more combat today, Mudriver," Darkpaw said hopefully.

"Jeez you and combat, we have been doing that for days. Even on your day off! You need to keep up with your hunting practice. It will be time for your evaluation soon and I don't want to be held responsible for not making sure you're at the best of your abilities in _all_ areas."

"Mudriver, I'm the best hunter in the clan. Do I really have to get better?" Darkpaw protested.

"Yes now march your stripy ass into that forest and hunt!" Mudriver ordered.

"Fine," Darkpaw grumbled, cursing under his breath.

"I heard that," Mudriver said, nudging his apprentice from behind, "And I will not be fucking myself any time soon so forget about it."

"Are you sure about that?" Thundertail laughed as she walked up to the two toms exiting the camp.

"Positive," Mudriver said rolling his eyes.

"Ok if you say so," Thundertail said with a wink at Darkpaw before she departed to the fresh kill pile.

"She-cats," Mudriver muttered under his breath.

Darkpaw just grinned and began scenting for prey.

_

"Hey Darkpaw! Helloooooo! Darkpaw!"

Darkpaw's eyes snapped open and he jumped. "Huh? What? What is it?" he asked looking around.

"You were zoning out again. Are you feeling ok?" his mentor answered straightening up.

"Yeah I'm fine, just a little tired I guess," the tabby said shrugging.

"Did you sleep ok last night?" Mudriver asked.

"No I don't think so. I must have had a dream or something and I just can't remember it," Darkpaw said as he continued scenting for prey. He had been zoning out constantly and he was worried Mudriver might get suspicious. He hissed in frustration as he missed another mouse and watched it scamper off into a hole.

"Are you sure you're ok?" Mudriver questioned, feeling a little concerned.

"Yes I'm just having an off day," Darkpaw snapped.

"Ok I was just making sure. I don't think we should do combat today. I think you should go back to camp and chill a bit," the warrior said.

"Ok fine," Darkpaw agreed. It was not very long past sun high. He knew they were early, but not too bad.

On the way back to camp, the two collected their prey. Darkpaw dropped what he had caught and chose a piece for Runningnose.

"So if you're not late you're early, eh?" the elder said as Darkpaw entered the dark den.

Darkpaw ignored the comment. "Do you need anything else?" he asked.

"Yes I think I could go for some catnip from Littlecloud and clean up around here just a bit," Runningnose said.

Darkpaw nodded and took off towards the medicine cat's den. After getting the catnip, he carried them back to Runningnose who was waiting outside the den. The thought of taking some of the catnip for himself crossed his mind.

"No it's for Runningnose," he mumbled to himself. _'But how much could he possibly need?...No it wouldn't be right. Besides, what good would it do me now anyway? Mudriver already ended training for today.' _Finishing his last thought, Darkpaw dropped the pile of catnip in front of the elder and entered the den. After changing the bedding for Runningnose's nest and scraping out and burying his dirt and left over carcasses, Darkpaw walked back out into the light.

"Thank you, Darkpaw," Runningnose called to the departing tabby.

Darkpaw didn't respond, but simply made his way back to his nest. Between hunting and taking care of Runningnose, the young tom was exhausted once again. He flopped down in his nest and quickly fell asleep despite the bright sunlight hitting him. The shadow caused by the stump was slowly growing and Darkpaw was soon in comfortable darkness.

**Ok I know updating this took a little longer than normal but I am experiencing a slight writer's block. Don't worry I will continue updating but it might take a little longer until I get my mojo back. Oh and just so you know I am starting my junior year of high school the 21st of this month so that will also affect my speed of updating but I will do my best. Until next time…**


	12. Chapter 11

_There was a loud shriek that turned to a choked gurgle as the tabby's claws raked down the neck and stomach of his victim. The silver tom's blood spilled onto the tabby's paws but he didn't have time to shake it off as the she-cat lunged for him. With lightening-quick speed, the tabby spun around and delivered a vicious blow to the she-cat's face causing her to fly to the side and hit the ground hard on her side. The tabby prepared to leap at her, but the black and white tom blocked his way. With a hiss of anger the tabby swiped out at the tom making him stagger to the side, leaving the she-cat unprotected. She tried to strike at him, but he simply lept over her, landing on her back and forcing her to the ground. A quick bite to the neck and it was over for her, but the tabby had to jump into the air once more to avoid another attack from the remaining tom. The tabby landed just as the black and white body had passed completely under him and clawed the fleeing hindquarters. The tom hissed and wheeled around to face the tabby, but was met with another claw to the face and grunted as he staggered back. The tabby wasted no time and clamped his jaws around the tom's throat before he even had a chance to react. The tom struggled and shook in an attempt to shake off his attacker, but it would not happen. His struggles became weaker and more labored until finally the tom collapsed and only then did the tabby's jaws leave his skin._

___

"Well isn't that just like a rouge. Being lazy and laying around while true warriors work."

Darkpaw growled and opened his eyes to see another tabby standing over him with a disgusted look on his face. Windpaw was beside her brother rolling her eyes.

"We aren't warriors yet, Tigerpaw, and what makes you think he hasn't done anything today," the white apprentice said.

"Oh please, as if he could actually pull off training, hunting, and taking care of Runningnose all before we got back from training," Tigerpaw snorted.

"Actually, Cockpaw, I did just that, but thank you for waking me, after all there's nothing I like better than waking up to see the most annoying thing in the forest," Darkpaw said standing and shaking.

"Why you little bastard! I'll kill you for that!" Tigerpaw shouted and unsheathed his claws.

"Try it," Darkpaw dared, extending his own claws and dropping into a ready crouch.

Tigerpaw prepared a sharp blow to the smaller tabby's head, but two sets of claws slammed into the side of his own and he collapsed with a grunt.

Darkpaw looked at the paw he had used to strike the other apprentice in confusion. He had only used a single paw, but two had hit the tabby. His confusion cleared up when he saw Windpaw also examining her paw. She glanced at him and he tilted his head to the side.

"Yes I did that. You gonna bitch at me now for helping you?" she asked sarcastically.

Darkpaw quickly shook his head. "No I just wasn't expecting you to…well…"

"He was pissing me off. You haven't done anything to deserve the shit everyone gives you."

"I know but I-" Darkpaw was cutoff by Tigerpaw's angry growl.

"What the fuck was that, Windpaw? Are you crazy?" he hissed at his sister.

"No I'm not but are you," Windpaw hissed back extending her claws once more.

"Don't betray your clan. You're really gonna side with _him_?" Tigerpaw growled.

"Whether you like it or not, _brother_, he _is_ part of our clan and no matter how much you bitch and complain, that's not going to change so fuck off or I'll send you to Littlecloud's den for a week," Windpaw spat and made a false swing at her brother.

Tigerpaw backed away from the blow. "Fine," he spat and walked off shooting one last glare at Darkpaw as he went. Darkpaw's fur fluffed out and he raised his hackles with his claws extended and growled warningly at the departing tabby. Tigerpaw did not react and simply continued on his way.

"Stupidass jerk," Darkpaw mumbled, "I could take him anytime of any day."

"Probably, but I don't think Blackstar would approve," Windpaw said.

"What do I care? It's not like I'm exactly in everyone's good graces anyway," Darkpaw sighed rolling his eyes.

"Thundertail and Mudriver seem to like you," Windpaw offered.

"Oooohh two out of a whole forest, strike that, two out of the whole damn world," Darkpaw hissed.

"…I like you," Windpaw said quietly.

Darkpaw turned to her, confusion on his face. "What?" He was sure he hadn't heard her properly.

"I said I like you," Windpaw repeated, meeting his icy eyes.

"Really?" Darkpaw asked. He wanted to believe her, but how could he? She was Tigerpaw's sister. This could easily lead him into another trap and he was sick of those.

"Yes really, I mean, why else would I go against Tigerpaw like that?"

Darkpaw thought about it. She was right, but he just couldn't find it in himself to trust her. He tried, he really did, but he barely even trusted Mudriver and Thundertail. "I guess you're right," he said looking at his paws.

"But you still don't trust me do you?" Windpaw said, leaning down to meet his eyes again.

"Not at all," Darkpaw admitted holding her gaze for a few moments before walking off without another word.

"Hey, bud, you feeling better now?" Mudriver asked as Darkpaw approached. The last rays of sunlight danced across the tabby's fur and accented his movements acutely. Even in the dimming light Mudriver could tell that something was bothering the young apprentice.

"Yeah I'm fine," Darkpaw sighed as he sat next to his mentor.

"Really? That's great. You wanna tell me the truth now?" Mudriver said looking down at the kit.

"No not really," the tabby said meeting the grey tom's gaze.

"Alright fine then why did you come over here?" Mudriver countered.

Darkpaw groaned, "Fine I just had to get away from Windpaw ok."

"Ah I see. She's trying to be all friendly huh?"

"Yeah and I can't see why."

"Of course, you don't need her."

"Exactly!"

"And what does it matter if she thinks you aren't completely terrible, that maybe you don't deserve everyone's distain and could use another friend."

Darkpaw paused and looked up at his mentor. "W…what do you mean by that?" he asked. He was confused. He had thought he and Mudriver were agreeing but Mudriver seemed to have switched it around leaving Darkpaw totally lost.

"Why can't you just give her a chance? Like it or not, she is the only apprentice who isn't out to get you and one of the only cats in this clan who doesn't think you are a waste of fur," Mudriver said soberly, a tone Darkpaw was not entirely used to from him.

"But I don't trust her," he sighed looking away.

"So, why don't you try? You didn't trust me at first," Mudriver pressed.

"I hardly trust you now."

"Exactly, but it's a hell of a lot more than you used to and you aren't trying to push me away from trying to gain more of it," the older tom pointed out.

"Yeah but…Tigerpaw would get even more pissed off," Darkpaw groaned at the thought of having to watch his back constantly for the annoying orange tom even though he already did.

"You mean to tell me that the great Darkpaw, best hunter and maybe even fighter in all of ShadowClan is afraid of another _apprentice_?! Well then I suppose fine, run off and be alone and let your fear of Tigerpaw dictate your whole life."

Darkpaw was shocked by his mentor's speech. He had never been talked to like this and he certainly wouldn't have expected it from Mudriver. "I'm…I'm not afraid of Tigerpaw," he stammered.

"Coulda fooled me," Mudriver scoffed.

"I'm not!" Darkpaw was seething now. How could Mudriver have so little faith in him?!

"Then prove it!" Mudriver challenged secretly pleased with the tabby's reaction.

"Maybe I will!" Darkpaw shouted and stalked off as the last bit of sunlight fled and allowed the moon to shine supreme.

"What was that all about?" Thundertail asked as she approached her brother and watched the little tabby walk off.

"Oh I was just pushing Darkpaw to be a bit more social," Mudriver explained turning to his sister.

"Darkpaw? Social? You really think that could ever happen?" Thundertail said doubtfully.

"Maybe, guess it's worth a shot," Mudriver shrugged and led the way back to the warriors' den.

Darkpaw sighed as he approached the apprentices' den. He scanned to see who was in there and saw only Windpaw's life signature. But before he could set a single paw inside the dark den, claws gripped his shoulders and wrenched him back. Darkpaw landed with a grunt on his back in front of Tigerpaw, Thicketpaw, and Speckledpaw. He groaned in annoyance as he looked at the three all too familiar faces of his rivals.

"And just where do you think _you_ are going, bastard?" Tigerpaw hissed.

"Wherever the fuck I feel like, dipshit," Darkpaw said as he began to pick himself up but the tabby pushed him down again and this time the other two apprentices held him down. He didn't bother to struggle yet and simply looked up into the tabby face of Tigerpaw.

"Wrong, you are going where I say you can go and I say: no rouges allowed in the dens," the orange tom growled with a wide smirk on his face.

"You want to do what he says. If you don't, well, let's just say, I'm glad I'm not you," Thicketpaw hissed in Darkpaw's ear.

"Shut up, slut, I don't care what you have to say," Darkpaw growled back. A heavy blow landed on his head as a result of his comment and he glared once again at the other tabby.

"I wouldn't say such things, Darkstripe, it's not polite," Tigerpaw said as he licked the paw he had used to strike the smaller tom.

Darkpaw growled. Anger was filling him very quickly and it was all he could do to keep himself from trying to attack the tabby right now. Suddenly, an idea hit him. It was almost guaranteed to cause him pain, but he didn't care. Taking a deep breath to steady his voice, Darkpaw said, "As you wish, Tiger_claw_."

There was a shocked silence. Like every apprentice present had just been delivered a blow and they had no idea how to react. Darkpaw smirked inwardly but kept his neutral expression as he looked at his tormentor.

Tigerpaw's claws suddenly extended to their full length and his face contorted to that of pure rage and hatred. With a shriek, he launched himself at the small tom, tackling him thru the brush and hardly giving Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw a chance to flee.

Darkpaw grunted as the heavy tabby form landed on top of him and struck out with his claws to keep the raining blows off of him. Claws beat him around the head and ears and he felt himself becoming dazed. He couldn't get Tigerpaw off of his body. No matter how skilled he was, Tigerpaw was bigger. Darkpaw's mind suddenly flashed back to the fight he had seen between Tears and Crys. Crys had been in this exact position and maybe, just maybe, he could employ the same move and, if not get the same result, unbalance his attacker enough to snatch the upper paw back. It was a long shot, but he had to do something. Darkpaw quickly focused his anger into strength and shrieked as he shoved Tigerpaw with all his might and lept to his paws. With a hiss, Darkpaw delivered his strongest blow to the tabby's face and Tigerpaw cried out in pain. The older tom cried out again as he put his paw to his face, rubbing and batting at it desperately. Darkpaw looked on as Tigerpaw backed up unconsciously due to his panic and pain. He glanced over and saw Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw looking on in horror. Suddenly, the bushes parted and four grown cats darted into the clearing. Darkpaw though he was going to be sick when he saw who it was.

Gingerstripe and Thistlefeather took one glance at Darkpaw before rushing to their son's side. Blackstar gave Darkpaw a harsh look before walking over to join them. The small tabby gulped as he looked up at the fourth cat, Mudriver was staring at him, glancing at Tigerpaw at uneven intervals. Thundertail stepped thru the bushes and surveyed the scene. Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw stepped up beside her. She motioned for them to follow her and she led them back into the camp. Darkpaw turned away from his mentor's yellow stare and watched as Gingerstripe gently carried his son to the medicine cat's den while Thistlefeather whispered comfortingly into his ear. Tigerpaw continued to whimper as blood trickled down his face. The red substance prevented Darkpaw from seeing the full extent of what he had caused, but Tigerpaw's eyes were closed and Blackstar was continuing to shoot him harsh looks until they disappeared into Littlecloud's den.

Darkpaw's luck was simply getting worse and worse as Windpaw stepped out of the apprentices' den just in time to see her brother carried into the medicine cat's den.

"What happened?!" she cried looking at Thicketpaw and shooting a glance at Darkpaw.

"The rouge attacked him!" Thicketpaw answered in a hiss and shot a glare at said tabby.

"What!? No I didn't!" Darkpaw shouted but Windpaw was already running to Littlecloud's den with the other apprentices. Darkpaw looked back up at Mudriver. "Mudriver…I swear I didn't mean to…he was the one that attacked me I swear! You gotta believe me! I was just protecting myself!"

Mudriver just followed the apprentices. He stopped half way and motioned for Darkpaw to follow him. Darkpaw reluctantly did and the two entered the den together.

Littlecloud was hunched over the mass of orange fur with Thistlefeather and Gingerstripe. Windpaw was sitting between her father's front paws with a worried expression on her face. Thundertail and Blackstar were hanging back with the other two apprentices who were pacing nervously. Speckledpaw was the first to notice the new arrivals.

"You!" the calico shouted and ran at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw braced himself for the impact, but it never came. Thundertail had snatched up the tom and thrown him onto his back while Mudriver had jumped in front of Thicketpaw to block her as well. Blackstar watched this with no amusement as he walked over to Littlecloud. The small tom had straightened up and was examining his work.

"The blow just missed his eye. His lower eyelid was torn in half but it should heal soon with little scaring. No immense damage was done to the inside of his ear, the scratch was deep but no blood flowed into it so his hearing won't be affected. His nose will also be fine and I got most of the blood out of it. His sense of smell might be dulled a little but other than that, he should heal just fine. I want him to stay in here for a few days so I can ensure no infection develops," Littlecloud explained.

Blackstar nodded as he looked down at the injured tabby. Littlecloud stepped away from the crowd and made his way to Darkpaw. Darkpaw cringed, but Littlecloud merely examined the small cuts on his head and ears.

"You should be fine, Darkpaw, I don't even see any blood but I'll put some antibiotics on it just in case." The small tom stepped over to his inventory and picked out an herb that Darkpaw had never seen before. Littlecloud smeared the juice from the plant on Darkpaw's head.

Darkpaw hissed as he could now feel every one of his cuts stinging. His claws extended and his eyes watered as he closed them tightly.

"I know, but don't try to clean that off or I will have to do it all over again. The pain will go away soon," Littlecloud promised.

As he spoke, Darkpaw could already feel the stinging subsiding. He stood up straight though he was panting slightly. "Thank you, Littlecloud," he said.

"That's what I'm here for," the medicine cat answered.

Darkpaw glanced over and saw that Blackstar was asking everyone to clear out of the den. He turned to follow Mudriver out.

"You stay," Blackstar ordered coldly.

Darkpaw flinched. He didn't turn back around, hoping Blackstar had been talking to someone else, but his hopes were dashed when Blackstar added: "Every tabby is to stay in here." Darkpaw sighed and turned to face his leader, wishing that his coat could have been a solid color. But then he realized if his coat had been a solid color, he probably wouldn't be here right now anyway.

"Yes Blackstar," he whispered. He sensed Mudriver giving him a sympathetic look and his hope was slightly rekindled in knowing that his mentor at least didn't hate him.

"Come," Blackstar snapped.

Darkpaw took a deep breath and approached the large white tom and orange tabby laying in one of the nests. He looked down at Tigerpaw. The blood had been cleaned from his wounds and cobwebs had been pressed to his skin to keep more from leaking out. Darkpaw followed the design of the webs to see just what his claws had done. Only three had actually made contact with the tabby's face. The middle one stretched from just inside Tigerpaw's left ear, down his left eye, tearing the lower lid in half, and just above his nose. The top one had just missed his ear and eye and had given the older apprentice's muzzle a deep gash. And the bottom one had started at just missing the outer corner of Tigerpaw's left eye and had sent a deep cut across his nose, nearly splitting the difference between his nostrils. Darkpaw was shocked that he had achieved such damage and knew he would need to pay for it. Tigerpaw's right eye opened and he pierced Darkpaw with his hate filled gaze.

"So which one of you would like to explain how this whole thing happened?" Blackstar said flatly.

Darkpaw opened his mouth to start speaking, but he was cut off.

"This fucking rouge called me Tigerclaw!" Tigerpaw shouted then cringed as the movement irritated his wound.

"This dickwad and his cronies ambushed me then he attacked me! It was self defense!" Darkpaw defended.

"Nuh uh! We didn't do anything. Blackstar, he's crazy! You gotta get rid of him before he kills someone!" Tigerpaw yelled.

"You liar!" Darkpaw's claws extended slightly but he quickly sheathed them, but Tigerpaw had already noticed.

"You see, you see?! He almost attacked me just now he only stopped because you're here!"

"Enough! Both of you shut the fuck up!" Blackstar snapped and both apprentices were immediately silenced. "Ok, Tigerpaw, I'll go have a talk with Speckledpaw and Thicketpaw and see if they can give me some more insight on what happened. Darkpaw, come with me," Blackstar ordered.

"Uh they might be a little fuzzy on what happened, I mean, it was really fast and they were confused," Tigerpaw called after the departing cats.

"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll be a big help," Blackstar called back.

Once they had exited Littlecloud's den, leader and apprentice made their way over to the apprentices' den. Darkpaw followed slowly behind Blackstar, the embedded fear of a harsh blow stinging thru his mind. At any moment he waited for Blackstar to spin around and hit him so hard he would end up in a nest next to Tigerpaw or even dead.

"Thicketpaw, Speckledpaw, come out here," Blackstar called inside the den. Said apprentices quickly appeared. "In," Blackstar ordered Darkpaw with a jerk of his head towards the den.

"Oh he's not allowed in there," Speckledpaw said.

"Oh really? And why is that?" Blackstar questioned.

"Uh…" Speckledpaw glanced at Thicketpaw and knew he had messed up.

"Well…?" Blackstar pressed.

"Tigerpaw says rouges don't belong in the dens," Thicketpaw sighed knowing there was no way out of this.

"Oh I see. Well, my dear Thicketpaw, is Tigerpaw the leader?" Blackstar asked his voice dangerously pleasant as he leaned down to be level with Thicketpaw.

"No," Thicketpaw answered not daring to meet the large tom's gaze.

"Is he the deputy?" Blackstar continued.

"No."

"Does he have the authority to make any of the rules?"

"No."

"So who does?"

"You?"

"That's right. What am I?"

"The leader."

"And what did the leader tell Darkpaw to do?"

"Go inside the den."

"So who should Darkpaw listen to?"

"You, sir," Thicketpaw sighed.

"Good girl. Now what is Darkpaw again?"

"A r-…I mean, an apprentice?"

"Good and are rouges apprentices?"

"No."

"Would I make a rouge an apprentice?"

"No."

"So what is Darkpaw?"

"A member of ShadowClan?"

"Exactly, so let's say Tigerpaw's rule did apply, would Darkpaw need to be concerned with it?"

"No."

"Right you are. Darkpaw, in the den. You two, come with me," Blackstar ordered straightening up.

Darkpaw nodded and quickly walked into the apprentices' den for the second time in his life. His heart sank as he saw Windpaw curled up in her nest. He considered sneaking back out, but she turned and her gaze met his. He simply stood where he was, not knowing what to do. He half expected her to claw his eyes out for what he had done to her brother, but she didn't move. She didn't say anything. She just looked at him, her own blue gaze sweeping over his tabby form. Darkpaw found that her delay made him even tenser. Finally, she spoke.

"Well, are you going to come in or just stand there?" she asked.

Darkpaw awkwardly made his way deeper into the den where she was laying. She stood up and he flinched instinctively.

"What's your problem?" she asked seeing his reaction.

"I thought you were going to…I mean…never mind, aren't you mad at me?" he stammered.

"I don't know. Why did you do it? What happened?" she said.

"I was coming in to…well…to talk to you, but Tigerpaw and the others attacked me. I got really mad and called him Tigerclaw so he attacked me. I didn't mean to hit him as hard as I did, but I couldn't help it. It just…happened," Darkpaw explained.

"So it was an accident, you hurting him that bad?" she asked.

"Yeah."

"Then no I'm not mad at you."

"So you…you believe me?" Darkpaw was stunned.

"What would you have to gain from lying? It's not like my opinion matters much to you," Windpaw said simply.

"Oh, I guess your right," Darkpaw said.

"But there is one thing I don't understand."

"What?"

"Why did you want to talk to me?"

"Oh," Darkpaw had hoped he wouldn't need to explain this, "Well I…I felt bad about what I said and how I acted. I'm not going to lie, I don't really trust you, but I could have at least put in an effort, it's not like many of the cats here offer to even get to know me."

"So you were coming to apologize?"

"Well I wouldn't exactly…well I guess sorta yeah." Darkpaw hadn't seen it that way. He had never really apologized for anything before. He just hadn't wanted her to hate him like everyone else did when she was willing not to.

"Then apology accepted," Windpaw said.

"I didn't say 'I'm sorry'."

"But you are and you were going to say it so I accept."

Darkpaw was confused. He had never apologized before, but if that's all it took, it was easier than he though. But it was confusing. Maybe it was just the she-cat and the way she was spinning her words. He simply chose to stay silent and hope she would continue the conversation or end it for him because he had no idea how to.

"You're not good with conversation are you?" Windpaw said.

"Um no not really," Darkpaw admitted.

"That's understandable it's not like you have many people to talk to. It's getting late, maybe we should go to sleep," Windpaw offered.

"Blackstar told me to stay in here," the tabby sighed although the idea of curling up in his nest didn't sound bad.

"So?" Windpaw asked.

"Um…I sleep out there remember? I don't have a nest in here, just me being in here is a miracle," Darkpaw explained.

"Then come here and sleep in Tigerpaw's nest," Windpaw offered gesturing at the nest next to her.

"I don't think that's a very good idea," Darkpaw pointed out.

"Oh yeah you're probably right…then here you sleep in my nest and I'll sleep in his nest," the she-cat said and moved into said nest.

"Uh I…ok," Darkpaw said and approached the now empty nest. It smelled strongly of Windpaw, which made sense. Fresh moss and ferns lined it and even some bird feathers. Darkpaw stepped into it and was shocked by how soft it was. He sighed and curled up in it. There was much more space than his tightly curled position required but he didn't stretch out. If he did far enough, he would be pelt to pelt with Windpaw and something made him wary of that contact.

Windpaw watched as the tabby curled up next to her. He seemed unsure but she couldn't help but grin when he sighed his contentment. He curled up so tight she could have probably slid in there with him. He fell asleep quickly but he was restless. He was whimpering and twitching as he slept. Windpaw adjusted her position slightly and groaned at the roughness of her brother's nest. She much preferred her own soft bedding…

The idea seemed absurd to her at first. Surely he would wake up, but he seemed very deep in his sleep even if he was restless. There was plenty of room for her. The nights were getting colder and she was so used to her brother's coat pressed lightly against hers as they slept. After a few minutes of ensuring Darkpaw was defiantly asleep, Windpaw gathered her courage and, ever so carefully, slipped into her nest. Darkpaw didn't react so she laid down slowly, curling her body around his. She flinched as he stirred, but he merely pressed himself more wholly against her stomach and chest. She released her held breath and relaxed into her position. She unconsciously placed her front leg around her small nest mate as she fell asleep. She did note, however, that as soon as his body realized her contact with it, the tabby's stirring stopped and his body truly did relax.

_

"So you're saying Tigerpaw was trying to protect Windpaw from Darkpaw, correct?"

"Yes, Blackstar," Speckledpaw stammered.

"And has Darkpaw threatened Windpaw in any way previously?" Blackstar continued.

"Well, Tigerpaw says-"

"No, never mind what Tigerpaw says, did Darkpaw appear to pose any real threat to Windpaw in your own opinion?" Blackstar cut the apprentice off.

"…No I don't think so. He never even tried to start a conversation with her, let alone hurt her," Speckledpaw said. He hated questions. He had never been good with being on the spot. He was just used to doing as he was told, nothing more. It was so much easier, but that wasn't how it went with Blackstar. Blackstar always made you speak especially when you would much prefer to be yelled at.

"So would you say the attack was justified?" Blackstar pressed.

Again more questions. _'Oh shit why does he have to do this to me? I wish Thicketpaw was here, she'd help, but of course she has to wait outside and I'm stuck in here with a sadistic tom who asks too many questions. What am I supposed to say? Tigerpaw made it sound like it was justified but now that Blackstar's making me think about it, it doesn't sound as justifiable. Damnit Blackstar! The answer is no but Tigerpaw and Thicketpaw will kill me if I say that, but if I say yes he's gonna make me explain myself and I can't since it was Tigerpaw's idea and then we'll be right back here. Shit I bet he knows I'm stuck on this too, that's why he chose to interrogate me first, bet he doesn't even bother talking to Thicketpaw, she'd defend Tigerpaw even if she was being tortured.'_

"Well come on now, it's getting late. Is the answer 'yes' or 'no'? It's very simple Speckledpaw."

'_Easy for you to say. You don't have to deal with the ramifications of this answer.' _"The answer is 'no', sir, I don't think it was justified," Speckledpaw sighed.

"Thank you, Speckledpaw, you and Thicketpaw may go now," Blackstar said.

'_I knew it,' _Speckledpaw thought as he dashed out of the den to Thicketpaw.

"Well, what did you say?" the brown she-cat asked as the calico emerged into the night air.

"He wanted to know why we did it," Speckledpaw said.

"You told him what we did!?" Thicketpaw hissed.

"He already knew, I tried to deny it but you know you can't fool Blackstar," Speckledpaw said defensively.

"Fine, then what did you say?" Thicketpaw said rolling her eyes.

"I told him it was because Dar- I mean, the rouge was posing a threat to Windpaw."

"And…?"

"He wanted to know what sort of threat and I had to admit, I have no idea since he's never actually threatened her before. So he asked me if I thought the attack was justifiable…"

"And then what did you say?" Thicketpaw asked dangerously. Her claws unsheathed slightly and Speckledpaw gulped. They had stopped their commute to the apprentices' den just before reaching Darkpaw's nest and Speckledpaw only wished they could just continue inside but Thicketpaw would not allow it.

"I said…" Speckledpaw called upon his courage. He did not deny that Thicketpaw intimidated him and he had good reason to be wary. She was bigger, stronger, and more skilled than he was and they both knew it. He wasn't incredibly far behind her, but it did tip the scale in her direction slightly and it really wasn't worth the risk to the calico. But he was a terrible liar, he had no chance at convincing Thicketpaw that he had said yes and then miraculously gotten Blackstar to see things his way. "I said 'no', Thicketpaw. I didn't think it was justified." It took all Speckledpaw's willpower to stand perfectly still and tall before the she-cat in front of him. He held her gaze steadily, he was no coward but he didn't really want to fight. Sometimes he wondered if he would have been better as a medicine cat apprentice, but it seemed like too slow a job at times and the idea of being a warrior still appealed to him.

Thicketpaw was furious. Speckledpaw had not only thrown Tigerpaw into the open, he was ok with it! He had the audacity to stand so shamelessly before her and admit that he doubted Tigerpaw's decision. Her fury escaped her body before she had a chance to stop it and her claws contacted with Speckledpaw's cheek in half a second. She was surprised at first, like she couldn't believe she had done that to her friend, but Speckledpaw didn't appear too badly hurt. He turned his head back and met her eyes once again. His soft green eyes looked into her amber ones and she immediately felt bad for causing the slow trickle of blood now going down his face. His expression held no anger, it was understanding actually and this surprised Thicketpaw the most. He had known she would be angry, he had seen it coming, and he hadn't made an attempt to stop her. All anger forgotten, Thicketpaw stepped forward and gently began to lick the blood from her friend's face. Speckledpaw simply closed his eyes and stood still, accepting the silent apology in this show of kindness. Thicketpaw didn't know what it was, but somehow it was nearly impossible to remain cross with Speckledpaw for very long, even Tigerpaw struggled with it. Maybe it was his accepting personality, or ever-innocent grass-green eyes, or maybe it was that he hardly said anything yet you could feel comfortable around him and like he understood you perfectly and was willing to be there for you. Whatever it was, Thicketpaw found herself walking with Speckledpaw into the apprentices' den no longer mad at him.

These good feeling were brought to an abrupt halt, though, when they viewed the scene before them. Windpaw and Darkpaw were cuddled against each other closely in her nest. By the way it looked, Windpaw had entered the nest after Darkpaw had gotten comfortable and they had since adjusted their positions to get closer and more comfortable together.

Thicketpaw looked at Speckledpaw but he just shrugged and walked to his nest calmly. Not knowing what else to do, Thicketpaw walked to her own nest and curled up. Tigerpaw would not be happy when he found out, but for now, she was tired and just wanted to sleep and it didn't matter who was with her in the den.

_

"So what are you going to do about those two?" Russetfur asked stepping into the shadows of Blackstar's den.

"Which two?" the white tom groaned.

"Darkpaw and Tigerpaw of course," Russetfur sighed shaking her head.

"I haven't got a clue. This is just getting harder and harder to handle. I'm starting to wish Darkpaw's mother had just dumped him on ThunderClan, let Firestar deal with the little terror," Blackstar sighed to his deputy.

"So you think he's a terror now?" Russetfur questioned.

"Yes…no…I don't know. He hasn't done anything without being provoked, but I don't know how to keep him from getting provoked by _someone_. And his reactions are always so…"

"Unorthodox?" the ginger she-cat offered.

"Exactly! What am I supposed to do?" Blackstar groaned again rolling onto his back.

"No clue. The easy way would be to kick the little look-alike out of the clan, but I've never seen you as the type to take the easy way out," Russetfur said.

"I'm not, but it's starting to look more appealing," Blackstar admitted.

"So what are you going to do?"

"I don't know, Russetfur, I just don't know…"

**Ok I know it took forever but I'm working thru a small thought block. I'm trying to get from point A to point B see and I'm not quite sure how to do that right now, but here's this chapter and I hope you enjoyed it. So do you think Blackstar will end all his troubles and kick out Darkpaw? Read and find out.**


	13. Chapter 12

Darkpaw's eyes slowly slid open. He was about to close them again when suddenly they snapped open and he was fully alert. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong. For one thing: it was dark, too dark. He knew he hadn't gone to sleep until at least moon-high so it should have gotten progressively lighter. There was no way he could have slept thru the entire day. Someone would have woken him up. Another thing was, he was warm. He shouldn't be this warm. Leaf-bare was coming and, while he had never experienced leaf-bare before, he quite remembered being told it was cold. He was also comfortable. Very comfortable. No matter what he ever did to his nest, he had never and would never be this comfortable or this warm.

While all this was contemplating in his head, the sudden remembrance of what had taken place the night before rushed back at him and smacked him in the face like icy water. He gasped as the memories filled his tired brain. This shocked him most of all because never had he been so relaxed in his sleep. He didn't even recall having a nightmare or dream of any sort. Just sleep, beautiful sleep. But he still didn't understand his warmth. The answer came to him in the form of a near heart-attack as a furry body next to him moved.

Darkpaw looked over and saw a white she-cat lying with him in the nest, her body forming a comforting and almost protective half-circle around his. Darkpaw racked his still groggy brain to see if he could remember her joining him, but he couldn't. He just remembered curling up alone in the nest and falling asleep much quicker than he did in his own. In fact, he distinctly remembered her agreeing to sleep in Tigerpaw's nest. Whatever the reason Windpaw was asleep with him, he had to get out, preferably without waking her. This would prove to be much more of a hassle than he had originally imagined since a single silver paw was laid across his stomach and holding him gently against the she-cat.

Carefully, ever so carefully, Darkpaw attempted to slide out from under Windpaw's grip. The she-cat, however, would not have this even if she was asleep and quickly tightened her grip around the tabby, pulling him even closer and nuzzling her soft nose into his back and purring gently. This action awoke something within Darkpaw. His urgency to leave faded slightly and he contemplated staying here in this warm embrace. He ever so vaguely remembered being cradled in a similar way when he was just a tiny kit. But this feeling, even if stirred, was groggy, and Darkpaw could not fully awaken it, so he decided to return to his escape attempt from Windpaw's loving company.

Wait, loving? Darkpaw shook his head from those thoughts. He was not loved. The attention he was getting was simply a sleepy she-cat's reaction to being stirred. He was positive Windpaw would have acted in a similar way if it was Tigerpaw lying beside her. But then, she loved Tigerpaw since he was her brother didn't she? Darkpaw shook his head again, sure that these thoughts were just the result of an overly relaxed mind. He had to get out to training and get his mind working again.

He gently slipped his own paw under Windpaw's and easily removed its contact with his body and laying it next to its own body. This done, Darkpaw quickly crept out of the nest without a sound before Windpaw's grip could be reimbursed. He ran out of the den without a glance back as Windpaw's curious paw prodded the still warm place he had lain in.

A wave of cold air hit Windpaw's stomach and her eyes opened slightly. The place next to her was empty and already growing cold. She caught Darkpaw's fleeting form rushing out of the den just before his tabby tail disappeared into the bright sun. Speckledpaw and Thicketpaw were still in their respected nests which gave Windpaw the assumption that no apprentice would be training today due to the previous night's events. Windpaw just shrugged. She hadn't had a day off in a while so the thought of having a day to relax didn't bother her, she'd probably go hunting later anyway but for now she just closed her eyes and went back to sleep.

Darkpaw hissed as he raced into the blinding sunlight. His eyes adjusted and he realized it was already sun-high. How could that be? He ran off to find his mentor, desperate for an explanation as to why he had not been awoken for training. He first checked the warriors' den, but Mudriver was not in there. He checked the elders' den, but Mudriver was of course not there. He spotted Thundertail entering the camp and rushed over to her.

"Thundertail, where's Mudriver!?" Darkpaw cried as he rushed over to the she-cat.

"He has the sun-high hunting patrol today," Thundertail explained.

"WHAT?! But why didn't he tell me!?" Darkpaw nearly cried again although his voice was still several octaves above the norm.

"He wasn't expecting it. He was going over to wake you up for training when Blackstar said he wouldn't be training you today because he was to go on the sun-high patrol," Thundertail said giving the tabby a sympathetic look, but Darkpaw didn't see it as he was already running towards Blackstar's den.

"Blackstar! Blackstar are you in there?" Darkpaw called into the dark den.

"Yes, Darkpaw, come in." The invitation had barely left the white tom's mouth before the silver and black tabby was before him.

"Blackstar why-"

"Is Mudriver not here?" Blackstar finished for him.

"Yeah why-"

"Did I put him on a patrol instead?"

"YES!" Darkpaw didn't have the patience for Blackstar's silly mind games. Unfortunately, Blackstar preferred his silly mind games.

"I'm glad you asked. Come with me, I can kill two birds with one claw," Blackstar said getting up and walking out of the den.

Darkpaw groaned in frustration and followed after his leader. If it would get him answers, he didn't care about this stupid game. He didn't care where Blackstar was taking him or why. He just wanted to know why this tom was keeping him from training. But Darkpaw started caring when he realized where they were going. Blackstar was leading him towards the medicine cat's den, which still housed Tigerpaw.

"Fuck," he mumbled as they got closer and Blackstar showed no signs of turning.

"Hello there, Littlecloud," Blackstar said pleasantly as they entered the den.

"Good afternoon, Blackstar," Littlecloud responded from where he was organizing some herbs.

"Blackstar's here?! Hey Blackstar, c'mere I wanna talk to you," a familiar voice called from the back of the den where the nests were.

"I'm coming, Tigerpaw, keep your damn fur on," Blackstar snapped all hints of pleasantry leaving his voice. Blackstar led Darkpaw to where Tigerpaw was laying. "What is it?"

"When can I get out of here?" Tigerpaw growled not yet noticing the other tabby crouching behind his leader.

"Funny, I was about to tell you that. Darkpaw get out from behind me," Blackstar ordered and Darkpaw immediately did as he was told, meeting Tigerpaw's gaze for the first time since the night before.

Tigerpaw clearly wasn't in any better mood with Darkpaw as his eyes quickly changed to hate-filled windows once again. Darkpaw returned the gaze tenfold with his own icy stare. Tigerpaw looked away first and instead turned back to Blackstar.

"So what were you going to tell me?" Tigerpaw asked with a sideways glance at Darkpaw who had not yet turned away.

"Well, since you seem so eager to get out of here, I was thinking tomorrow," Blackstar offered.

"Really?! Yes!!!" Tigerpaw cried in happiness then hissed as his face stung.

"Great, tomorrow you will leave this den behind…and take up the elders' den with Runningnose," Blackstar said.

"WHAT?!" Tigerpaw's happiness had disappeared. He was sure he must have heard wrong. "B-but I don't need to go to the elders' den," he protested.

"Just temporarily. You will take over caring for the elders' den and stay there with Runningnose until the day after the next gathering which you will not be attending."

Darkpaw had snapped his attention back to Blackstar as soon as he had heard mention of the elders' den. He remembered the day he had been forced to stay with Runningnose in the elders' den for only a single day and the boredom had been nearly too much to bear. While he was pleased to see Tigerpaw receiving such a punishment, he knew he wouldn't be getting off easy either.

"Now for your turn," Blackstar said as if reading Darkpaw's thoughts, "You will remain an apprentice, but you will be Littlecloud's apprentice. That's right, you will do everything Littlecloud wants you to do and you will listen to him no matter what he tells you to do. The day of the gathering, you will be released and go back to being Mudriver's apprentice, understand?"

Darkpaw nodded. Blackstar seemed to have mastered Darkpaw's weakness: following orders. He mentally counted how long it would be before he could return to his mentor. Remembering the shape of the moon the night before and counting how long it had been since the last full moon, Darkpaw decided that in three days he would be able to get back to his warrior training which meant it would be four days before Tigerpaw did. A mixture of dread and satisfaction filled the little tabby. The timing, though, was perfect because on the night of the gathering, Darkpaw had an appointment. And Tigerpaw being in a den clear across the camp would defiantly help in this cause.

"This sucks," Tigerpaw mumbled.

"Oh shut up, would you? If you're as great as you think you are then a few days hiatus from training should be no problem," Darkpaw snapped.

Blackstar looked down at Darkpaw amused. He hadn't expected the little outburst, but it seemed so close to what he himself would say, he couldn't help but grin mentally.

"Why you little…" Tigerpaw started but Darkpaw had already unsheathed his claws and his paw was mere millimeters from the orange tom's face.

"Finish and this time I _will _take out your eye," Darkpaw said in a deadly tone.

"Enough, come, Darkpaw, you won't start helping Littlecloud until tomorrow and you still have hunting to do," Blackstar said using his own paw to lower Darkpaw's.

Darkpaw nodded and began walking out of the den behind his leader.

"Bastard!!!"

Darkpaw spun around and took off straight towards the source of the comment. His claws extended as he ran. Anger filled him so wholly he was sure he could be flying. So close, Tigerpaw had raised himself from his nest and was standing prepared for the attack. Darkpaw launched himself at the older tom, but he was cut short as strong jaws closed over his back and threw him back towards the exit. He panted as he pulled himself into the sitting position to look at Blackstar, now standing in front of Tigerpaw, staring him down. Darkpaw knew better than to challenge the leader and looked back down at his paws as the pain in his back the white tom had caused began to subside. He glanced back up to see Blackstar land a sheathed smack to the uninjured side of Tigerpaw's face. A small smirk touched Darkpaw's mouth but it was gone before Blackstar turned back around. He crouched down as the great tom advanced on him, but a shove from Blackstar's heavy paw told him to continue to the exit.

When they got out of the den, Darkpaw glanced up at Blackstar. Annoyance was still on the tom's features. The apprentice opened his mouth to say something, but was quickly silenced by a wave of the leader's tail.

"Attacking a clan member is not permitted, whether they deserved it or even whether we are ShadowClan or not, we respect our clan, understand?" Blackstar said flatly.

Darkpaw nodded his understanding. He didn't know what being ShadowClan had to do with any of it, but he wasn't about to ask. Blackstar must have known that Darkpaw's first threat had been a warning, which must have meant that he knew as soon as Tigerpaw finished his statement that Darkpaw would hold true to it. Darkpaw shivered slightly at how well this tom knew him. He was a cat of his word or at least his threats and his warnings were best heeded. Blackstar must've had some confidence that this quality was in him to have known to act so quickly. There was no doubt in either tom's mind that if Blackstar had not intervened, Tigerpaw would now have additional injuries and Darkpaw might possibly even be in the nest next to him.

"Now, get out of my sight, you have hunting to do," Blackstar ordered before turning quickly and stalking off.

Darkpaw was about to do just that, when a question struck him. He contemplated asking it, but decided not asking it might do more harm that asking it might. Calling upon his courage, Darkpaw took a deep breath and re-summoned his leader.

"Blackstar?" he called. The white tom stopped and turned back to face the tabby apprentice.

"Yes?" Blackstar asked lazily not even bothering to re-approach Darkpaw.

"Am I still to take care of Runningnose today?" he asked lowering his head to brace himself for a snide remark from his leader or some sort of verbal lash.

"Yes," was all Blackstar said before turning back to wherever he had been going.

Darkpaw was surprised at how easily that had gone. Asking Blackstar a question generally led one into a myriad of counter-questions that resulted in the originally asked question to be answered by the asker via a series of confusing questions asked by their leader, leaving them feeling hopeless and dumb. This encounter had not gone in such a way. A single question and a single answer were all that the conversation had consisted of and Darkpaw decided he much preferred this way. Knowing that could quite possibly be a once in a lifetime interaction, Darkpaw did not push his luck and took off into the forest.

'_Mudriver isn't gonna believe that,' _Darkpaw thought to himself as he began tracking thru the low brush silently.

_

"I don't believe it," Mudriver said as Darkpaw finished recounting the previous events.

"Believe it, it's true," Darkpaw said.

"You're yankin' my leg," the older tom insisted.

"I'm not," Darkpaw insisted back.

"Just a quick little answer like that? He must've been crazy."

"I don't think so."

An encounter such as the one Darkpaw had had with Blackstar may seem incredibly obsolete had it happened with any other cat, but in this case, it was Blackstar which was almost as believable as a mouse being found sipping tea. Of course these cats had no idea what tea is, but you get the idea.

"So what was your punishment? What happened?" Mudriver asked returning to actually important matters.

"I have to be Littlecloud's apprentice until the gathering."

"WHAT?! Oh that sucks!" Mudriver complained.

"I know, but it's only three days. Tigerpaw has to stay in the elders' den for four days and has to take care of Runningnose and miss the gathering," Darkpaw said in an attempt to raise the grey cat's spirits once again.

"Damn, harsh, well I guess he deserves it seeing as he started the fight," Mudriver said with a slight shrug.

"Yeah, well I gotta go take care of Runningnose for apparently the last time," Darkpaw said. He nodded a goodbye to his mentor, grabbed a choice piece of kill and trotted over to Runningnose who was relaxing lazily in the setting sun.

"Hi there, Darkpaw, I hear this is the last time you'll be visiting me," Runningnose greeted as the tabby approached.

"Yeah, you're gonna have Tigerpaw keeping you company now," Darkpaw said dropping the vole in front of the elder.

"Ah, interesting," Runningnose said.

"So is there anything else you need?" Darkpaw asked. He wasn't really in the mood for conversation right now.

"Blackstar just told me to tell you to prepare a nest for Tigerpaw," Runningnose said.

Darkpaw stifled a groan. He knew that if he did a poor job, he would get hell for it from the orange tabby, but he was incredibly tempted to place a nice big thorn in the nest. Shaking the deviant thoughts away, Darkpaw started towards the apprentices' den. If he was going to make a good nest that Tigerpaw wouldn't bitch about, he would need some help or at least advice.

"Um, Windpaw, you in here?" he called into the darkness.

"No I'm back here," a soft voice giggled behind him.

The tabby yelped and jumped into the air, making an awkward turn before landing. Windpaw purred in amusement and the surprised look on the tabby's face. Darkpaw looked shyly at the ground.

"Nicely done," Windpaw laughed, "What did you need me for?"

"I have to prepare a nest for your brother in the elders' den and I don't know what he likes…or how to make a very good nest," Darkpaw said gesturing to his own messy pile of leaves and dry grass with his tail.

"You're asking for my help?" Windpaw asked.

"Yes," Darkpaw sighed. Damn she was almost as bad as her mentor.

"Alright then, let's go," she said cheerfully and gently pushed Darkpaw towards the camp exit.

The two apprentices didn't take too long in finding supplies. Tigerpaw, unlike his sister but ironically like Darkpaw, was not very picky when it came to his nest. The only thing he seemed to insist on was a few sticks to help it hold its structure and some fresh leaves. Anything else was basically whatever one could get their paws on. Tigerpaw also didn't care much about padding so little time was spent in this area.

Soon, Windpaw announced that they had all they needed and they headed back with their supplies. They put the items down in the space Runningnose had indicated and Darkpaw, with some coaching from Windpaw, began to build a satisfactory nest for his rival tabby.

"Nice," Windpaw complimented as Darkpaw stepped back to examine his work. A simple ring of sticks with leaves, grass, and bits of moss placed carefully woven together to create a structured yet not entirely uncomfortable nest made up Darkpaw's handiwork. "From looking at this, no one would ever guess that you had never really made a nest before."

"Thanks," Darkpaw said. He was fairly sure that had been a compliment. "Would you do me one last favor, Windpaw?"

"Sure, what is it?" she asked.

"Would you test it? I just want to make sure it won't collapse or anything. While that would be hilarious, I just don't want to deal with the shit I'd be sure to get as a result."

"Ok, but why can't you test it?" Windpaw questioned.

"I have a feeling your brother wouldn't be too happy about his nest smelling more like "rouge" than it already probably does," Darkpaw said flatly.

"Oh, ok," Windpaw said. She quickly climbed into the nest and curled up. "Hm, feels just like his nest in the apprentices' den."

"Ok," Darkpaw said and his words were followed by a yawn. He glanced at Windpaw, wondering if he should say 'goodnight' or something, but he just turned and began to walk back to his nest. His actual nest, not Windpaw's. That had been a one-time-deal under special circumstances he reminded himself.

"So what, you're just gonna go back to your reserved little self now?" Windpaw asked catching up to him quickly.

"That's the idea," Darkpaw said without looking at her. For some reason, he was getting a strange feeling every time she was near or talking to him. It was similar to how he felt around Mudriver and Thundertail but slightly altered and magnified. Darkpaw was sick of all these knew feelings and just wanted to go back to normal.

"Do you realize just how infuriating you are?" Windpaw asked.

This made Darkpaw stop and turn to her. "What do you mean?"

"Just that. You are all reserved and depressed all the time and as soon as you relax for just a little bit, you close right back up like opening up will make you vulnerable to something," Windpaw ranted.

Darkpaw was silent. What the hell was he supposed to say to that? How the hell had he suddenly become at fault?! He hadn't asked her to try and get to know him, she had done it on her own. He hadn't done anything outside of his basic behavior. Mudriver and Thundertail seemed to have embraced his personality, but suddenly Windpaw's frustration was his fault!?

"Well…say something!" Windpaw demanded.

What the hell!? He hadn't even started this conversation! Windpaw had seemed perfectly content in yelling at him just a second ago. Now he was supposed to have input? "Uhm…"

"And on top of everything else, you can't even carry a conversation to save your life!" Windpaw yelled.

"But I was about to-"

"Don't interrupt me, I'm yelling at you!" Windpaw snapped.

"…"

"…Well…do you have anything to say for yourself or not?" Windpaw demanded.

"I thought you were yelling at me," Darkpaw said. He was just getting more and more confused as time went on with this she-cat. He knew there was a reason he avoided conversations, they never made any sense.

"Well I'm done yelling at you so say something!" Windpaw ordered.

"What am I supposed to say?" Darkpaw was completely lost by now. He just wanted this to be over without angering Windpaw even more. But he would only get half his wish.

"ARG! You are so aggravating!!!" Windpaw shouted before stalking off.

'_The fuck just happened?!' _Darkpaw thought as he watched her go. He had been yelled at before, of course, but never like that. Normally he was being yelled at for something he understood and it made sense. That had been complete nonsense.

"Well well well, you confused yet?" Mudriver chuckled stepping up beside his apprentice.

Darkpaw nodded dumbly. "Is she ok?" he asked.

"Yep, that would be normal behavior," Mudriver confirmed.

"What!"

"Confusing ain't it? You wanna know how you coulda got outta that?" Mudriver offered.

"Yes," Darkpaw said. He defiantly wanted to know an easier way for what had happened.

"By doing exactly what you did. Just sit there and wait for it to be over. When a she-cat starts yelling at you, they don't want you to talk."

"But she told me to-"

"And she didn't let you, did she?"

Darkpaw shook his head. For how much Windpaw had demanded he speak, she hadn't wanted to hear a word he had to say, which was just as well since he hadn't had anything to say anyway.

"Don't worry about it, now that she's blown off her steam she'll be over it before you know it. Now, go to bed," Mudriver said.

"Ok, goodnight, Mudriver," Darkpaw said and continued to his nest. Windpaw was already curled up in her own soft nest. Darkpaw couldn't help but miss the comfort and warmth he had felt, but he knew he couldn't return to it, particularly with Windpaw's sudden prickly attitude.

"What does she know, maybe opening up will make me vulnerable. She wouldn't know, she's not on the outskirts of this clan. Everyone loves Windpaw. She doesn't know me at all," he mumbled to himself trying to bury the small feeling of guilt for having made her so angry. He had known letting her try to befriend him had been a bad idea. It was all Mudriver's fault that he had anyway. Darkpaw shook his head and looked at the apprentices' den from his nest.

A few cats had seen the argument, if it could be called that, and were watching Darkpaw as though they expected him to run into the den and attack Windpaw right then. He scowled and turned on his other side to hide himself completely from their judging eyes. He reached into his hiding place and took out his bone, clutching it gently to his chest. He could feel a fit coming on and wanted to try and prevent it, not wanting to deal with additional stress right now. The tiny pain that had begun to form vaporized and Darkpaw allowed his treasure to return to its place before relaxing into sleep as best he could.

_

"_Rouge!"_

"_You don't belong here!"_

"_Leave!"_

"_Make me you fags!" Darkpaw howled at the crowd of ShadowClan cats before him._

"_Kill him!" _

_Darkpaw looked and saw Tigerpaw smirking in the back. "Here's a better idea, why don't you come here and kill me yourself," he challenged._

"_With pleasure," the large tabby said and approached._

_Darkpaw bared his teeth and cracked his neck. He crouched his body low to the ground and extended his claws. As Tigerpaw got closer, the scar Darkpaw had left on his face became visible and Darkpaw smiled. "Aw you got a boo-boo?" Darkpaw taunted as Tigerpaw pushed his way thru the crowd._

"_Not as bad as what you're about to have!" Tigerpaw screeched and launched himself at the silver tabby._

_Darkpaw jumped as well and the two clashed in the air. The apprentices were too distracted by each other to notice their short flight. Darkpaw moved like a snake to maneuver his body over Tigerpaw before their bodies crashed to the ground. Tigerpaw grunted as the momentum in Darkpaw's body as it landed on him pushed the air from his lungs. Darkpaw moved to dig his fangs into Tigerpaw's neck, but clawed hind paws dug into his stomach and flung him head over heels off his victim. He turned a flip in the air and was half way thru another one before he landed hard on his neck. Darkpaw gagged as the rest of his body slammed to the ground on his back. Pain surged thru his body and he was momentarily stunned. This was all the time it took for Tigerpaw to close the gap he created and sank his fangs into Darkpaw's chest. Darkpaw saw Thundertail and Mudriver struggling thru the crowd to aid him._

"_Don't! Stay away from me!" Darkpaw ordered the grown cats._

_Thundertail gave him a confused look but Mudriver simply nodded, a look of understanding on his dirty face. Thundertail tried to continue towards him but Mudriver stopped her. She turned to her brother and he shook his head. She had a completely helpless look on her face as she watched the two apprentices fight._

"_No back up? Do you want to die?" Tigerpaw whispered him his ear._

"_Do you?" Darkpaw dug his front claws into Tigerpaw's shoulders and clamped his jaws on the orange tom's muzzle._

_Tigerpaw cried and sputtered in pain. He threw his head and upper body wildly trying to detach his assailant, but every move only worked to aid Darkpaw. One wild buck threw Darkpaw onto his paws, but he did not release his grip. He pushed forward and backed Tigerpaw hard into the stone by the entrance of Blackstar's den. Tigerpaw was forced onto his hind paws and Darkpaw finally released his face only to move his jaws to Tigerpaw's throat. _

_Just before he could clamp down, Darkpaw felt fangs dig into his scruff and drag him back. Darkpaw was thrown to the ground and a silver paw smashed into his face, knocking the breath out of him. He looked up into the dark eyes of Windpaw. Her normally soft features were contorted with hatred and anger._

"_You!" Darkpaw spat, "I knew I couldn't trust you!"_

"_Fucking rouge!" Windpaw shouted and sliced her claws at Darkpaw's throat._

_Darkpaw managed to roll out of the way just in time. He launched himself at Windpaw with his full force and slammed into her chest. She was knocked back and he prepared to bite her throat, but claws dug into the skin of his back and yanked him back once again._

"_Yet your filthy paws off my sister!" Tigerpaw shouted._

_Darkpaw struggled to roll onto his paws, but silver paws held him on his back. He looked up at the white she-cat over him. Danger glinted in her fangs and Darkpaw felt fear and dread fill him. Another set of claws dug into his hips, holding his hind legs down as well. Darkpaw glanced down to see a brown she-cat grinning back at him with a similar look to Windpaw's. Darkpaw hissed and struggled in anger, but his movements turned to desperation as Tigerpaw approached with Speckledpaw. The silver tabby looked wildly around at the clan. All of them were smiling or laughing at his predicament. Where were Mudriver and Thundertail now?_

"_Kill him!" the screeching voice of Snaketail called._

"_Burn and die yourself you bitch!" Darkpaw yowled before calico paws covered his mouth and forced him to watch as Tigerpaw approached his exposed belly._

_He struggled, but it did no good as he was basically immobile. Tigerpaw's claws extended longer than Darkpaw knew they could and came down fast and hard on his chest. He would have screamed in agony were it not for Speckledpaw silencing him. The pain was unreal as black claws were dragged down his underbelly. A warm sensation came over him as a red substance leaked from his torn flesh. Blood. His blood. He began to panic and struggle harder but it only made the pain worse._

"_Darkpaw."_

"_Darkpaw."_

___

"Darkpaw!" Littlecloud shook the flaying tabby worriedly. Darkpaw's shrieks could be heard throughout the camp.

Darkpaw's eyes flew open, bloodshot and haunted. He panted and could feel his heart slamming in his chest. His eyes caught Littlecloud's and he quickly shook off his fear though his heart was still racing.

"Y-yes Littlecloud, what is it?" Darkpaw panted as calmly as he could.

"Well for one you were screaming loud enough to drive all prey out of the forest, and for two, you are supposed to come with me today remember?" Littlecloud said.

"Me? Screaming?" Darkpaw asked. He didn't want to believe it. "I don't think so."

"Well I know so, what were you dreaming?" Littlecloud asked thoroughly concerned about the apprentice's health.

"I don't know," Darkpaw lied. No way he was about to admit to having dreamt his own death.

Littlecloud knew he was lying. Hell, it was obvious all over the kit's face, but he didn't push it. "Alright then, come on," Littlecloud said and led Darkpaw to his den.

Several cats were staring at Darkpaw as he walked behind the medicine cat. He shot them cold glares made even worse by his reddened eyes. They looked away. No use tormenting the monster right now when it was agitated enough.

Darkpaw followed Littlecloud into the privacy of his den and sat down. Exhaustion seemed to flow thru his body even though he had gotten a full night's sleep. His eyes wanted to close and it took a lot of focus to keep them open. He was almost glad he wouldn't need to do any training today, but he didn't know what other things Littlecloud would expect of him. Darkpaw sat patiently awaiting his orders.

While Littlecloud was busy looking over his supply of herbs, Darkpaw took a curious sniff around. The den, despite having only himself and Littlecloud in it seemed to be full of life. Darkpaw could not place it, but the whole place had a light golden tint to it. Something was here, but Darkpaw didn't know what it was.

"Darkpaw."

The apprentice was snapped out of his wanderings and opened his eyes. He turned to Littlecloud quickly. "Yes, Littlecloud?" he asked approaching said cat.

"I just want to check to see if you know what any of these herbs are first," Littlecloud explained stepping aside to show Darkpaw the array of herbs he had laid out.

"Oh, um, ok," Darkpaw said. How the hell was he supposed to know? They were herbs! They just did stuff! Oh well what could Littlecloud do if he didn't know? He wasn't a real medicine cat's apprentice. He was really required to know. He closed his eyes and took a quick sniff of the nearest herb.

_

Not long later, Littlecloud was floored to discover that Darkpaw could identify how each herb was used even if he hadn't seen the herb before or seen the illness that required it. He described in great detail the symptoms a cat might have and which herb would be used to cure or treat it and whether it was a cure or not. Littlecloud just stared at the silver tabby in astonishment and curiosity.

Darkpaw shifted uncomfortably under the medicine cat's gaze. "Um , Littlecloud, is something wrong?" he asked nervously. His gift had proven to be even more useful than he had initially thought and it seemed to have stumped the small cat. Littlecloud, of course, still did not know of Darkpaw's gift but even if he had it would not have taken away the amazement of this moment.

"How did you know all this?" he asked finally, "You've never even seen most of these herbs before and you didn't even know the illnesses they are used for."

"I don't know." It was only half a lie. He didn't know what caused his strange ability but he knew that was what had helped him.

Littlecloud wanted to know more. He desperately wanted to know more, but that would be difficult with Darkpaw. He would need to consult StarClan about it later and maybe mention it to Blackstar as well. This was sure to complicate things further. This talent could make Darkpaw an excellent medicine cat, but he didn't seem like the sort of cat with interest in this sort of thing. Littlecloud wasn't even sure if Darkpaw believed in StarClan, he had certainly never been taught about them.

With no sick or injured cats around the camp, Littlecloud sent Darkpaw out to get the herbs he was a little low on. Mainly the ones he had used to help Tigerpaw. Darkpaw nodded and trotted out of the den. His eyes dared a glance at the three small berries laying out on a rock near the far wall of the den. Three small, red berries that held only one word to them: _death_. All the other herbs had held a message of life and health and when they should be used. But the death berries held nothing. They caused one to become nothing. _Death._ It was a word that sent a shiver up Darkpaw's spine as he walked out of the camp.

_

The next few days went about the same way. Littlecloud taught Darkpaw how to use cobwebs to stop bleeding and how many poppy seeds could be used to aid with sleep without being too much. Little details that Darkpaw's gift hadn't been able to fill in. Darkpaw still didn't tell Littlecloud about his gift and Littlecloud didn't press the matter.

Darkpaw had been avoiding Windpaw as much as possible and stayed away from Tigerpaw about the same amount. With Windpaw training and Tigerpaw with Runningnose and Darkpaw choosing to sleep in the medicine cat's den like a real medicine cat apprentice, the three apprentices hardly had a chance to see each other. Windpaw had tried at one point to come in and talk to him, but he had only nodded at her woods and pretended to be busy with some herbs he couldn't actually remember the name for.

His couldn't remember any dreams if he had any, but he woke up with images of a starry place with cats that seemed to be made of them would approach him. A few times he thought he could distinctly hear them whispering his name before he woke up. He didn't mention any of these things to Littlecloud, of course, and tried to ignore them altogether. He played it off as a strange dream like those of his mother or just his imagination tricking him.

Finally, Blackstar's voice called through the camp. He was announcing the warriors that would be attending the gathering.

Darkpaw didn't really pay any attention to the announcement. All he had to know was Mudriver and Thundertail would be going as well as all the apprentices excluding himself and Tigerpaw. Darkpaw wasn't sure when his first gathering would be, but he knew he would not be going until he was at least six moons of age. He couldn't say he was excited about the idea of it since he knew it would be incredibly awkward and even disastrous. He almost pitied Blackstar for being the one who would have to announce it, but he worried more about himself. Blackstar had nine lives, he only had one and he was very small. Even with his fighting skills, he doubted he could take on an entire forest of fully trained warriors and older apprentices.

But not attending the gathering would bring other advantages along with it. Such as giving one the opportunity to attend a different sort of gathering that no one knew about. Darkpaw's paws prickled with anticipation for the coming night. Now was the time, he had made his decision and he would make it known.

**Ugh! This took me forever! But it's the weekend so I will hopefully be able to start work on the next chapter though I probably won't be able to finish it because of homework. God I hate weekend work! Ok well hope you liked this chapter and I will update as soon as I can but with school I have no idea when that might be. And remember: reviews make Darkpaw happy!**


	14. Chapter 13

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Cain- massive, murderous brown and black tabby tom. Ringfighter/tester.**

**Lily- pretty gold she-cat. Killed by Cain during her test.**

**Dusk- light brown tom with bright yellow eyes. Ringfighter apprentice. (mentioned but not seen in this chapter)**

**Worth- white she-cat with a yellow face and dark amber eyes. Ringfighter apprentice. (mentioned but not seen in this chapter)**

Darkpaw was no longer required to stay in the medicine cat's den with Littlecloud so he walked out casually into the bright camp. It was not long before sun-high but the den he had just left was always darker than the reality. He saw Mudriver and Thundertail sitting together and walked over to them.

"Hey, Darkpaw! Long time no see!" Mudriver greeted enthusiastically.

"How was it?" Thundertail asked.

Darkpaw just shrugged. "It was ok. Littlecloud couldn't figure out how I knew all the herbs." A mischievous grin appeared on the apprentice's face. "I didn't tell him, of course, but you should have seen his face," he laughed.

Mudriver fidgeted uncomfortably as did Thundertail. Several surrounding cats also looked up at the sound.

"As much as I like seeing you happy for a change, your laugh is really creepy, dude," Mudriver complained.

Darkpaw laughed again. "What's the matter, Mudriver? Scared?" he hissed mockingly.

"Yeah a little. Cut it out, dude, you're freaking me out," Mudriver said slinking behind Thundertail.

Thundertail rolled her eyes and batted her brother out from behind her. "You over-grown kit," she chided.

Darkpaw just sat back and watched the scene before him. This was normal. He had missed this during his few days with Littlecloud. He wasn't sure if his laugh really did bother Mudriver or not, and he didn't care. He laughed so rarely that it was never deemed important.

Darkpaw glanced over to the medicine cat's den. It continued to capture his thoughts. What had that signature been? And why did he always feel surrounded in there? It was true he felt that he was in a large crowed every time he entered the den and when he came back out, he was fine again.

"Uh-oh, girlfriend alert," Mudriver said shaking Darkpaw from his thoughts.

"Huh? Wha-oh shit. Wait, she's not my girlfriend!" Darkpaw said as Windpaw began approaching. There was no way of avoiding her now. He scowled up at Mudriver.

"What? She's your friend isn't she?" Mudriver said.

_No…yes…maybe…no…ok sorta…I don't know…DAMNIT MUDRIVER! _Darkpaw didn't get the chance to respond as Windpaw was already there.

"Morning, Mudriver, Thundertail…Darkpaw," she greeted.

Darkpaw gave a slight nod in return.

"So, um, how was it with Littlecloud?" she asked awkwardly.

"Fine," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"Listen, I just wanted to say I, well, I'm sorry I, you know, yelled at you a few days ago," she stammered.

Darkpaw was shocked. She was apologizing to him? She did that? It sounded much more like an intentional apology than his had. Regaining his composure, Darkpaw shrugged again. "Forget about it," he said calmly. He glanced to the side and caught Mudriver's eye. Mudriver had an amused look on his face.

"So, you're not mad?" Windpaw asked.

"No," the tabby answered simply.

"Ok, great…um, I should probably go now. Uh, bye you guys!" she called as she ran off.

"Bye, Windpaw," Mudriver and Thundertail called. Mudriver looked down at Darkpaw with a grin spread across his dirty features.

"What?" Darkpaw asked a little weirded out by his mentor's expression. It wasn't that seeing Mudriver happy was a strange thing, Darkpaw just wasn't used to having this emotion directed at him.

"She likes you," Mudriver said.

"Shut up," Darkpaw said rolling his eyes.

"It's true!" the grey tom insisted.

"Whatever." Darkpaw wasn't in the mood for his mentor's ridiculous attempts at making him more social. His mind was somewhere else. Far away, beyond ShadowClan territory. Oh, he would be social all right. He would be very social. He grinned and his claws flexed at the thought.

"What the hell is making you so creepily happy?" Mudriver asked snapping Darkpaw out of his thoughts once again.

"I'm starting to agree with my brother, and that's saying something. Where are you going in your head?" Thundertail added.

"Oh, nowhere. I'm just glad to be out of that den. Let's go somewhere," he suggested quickly.

"Sure, I have grooming to do anyway," Thundertail agreed with a grin at her brother.

"Damnit, Thundertail! It's taken me the entire moon to get my fur back to the way it was after your last attack! Can't you just leave me alone for once?!" Mudriver protested.

"No, now let's go," Thundertail giggled and dragged her brother after her towards the camp exit.

Darkpaw glanced around and caught Tigerpaw's eye as they left. The orange tabby's eyes narrowed with hate. Darkpaw just grinned and flashed his fangs tauntingly at the other apprentice. Cobwebs still covered his face and Darkpaw still felt pride for causing it.

_I'll kill you next time. _Both tabby's were surprised by the message, having both given and received it. Darkpaw's claws flexed. They would just have to see then.

Tigerpaw had come into the medicine cat's den a few times, but Littlecloud had known better than to let the two interact. What would happen the next night when they once again slept near each other? What would happen tonight when there was almost no supervision and defiantly none sided with Darkpaw?

"Darkpaw, come on!" Thundertail called.

"Coming," Darkpaw said. Shooting one last glare at Tigerpaw, the silver tabby dashed off after the two older cats. _'Asshole,' _he thought as he caught up.

"Bastard," Tigerpaw hissed in a whisper as he watched him go.

_

Once again, Darkpaw was shocked at how a normally tender act, such as grooming, could be made to appear so violent in the case of the siblings before him. Mudriver was struggling with all his might to get away from Thundertail, but she was not permitting it.

Darkpaw watched them unseeingly, his thoughts once again returning to tonight's events. What would happen? Would they accept him? What sort of test would he be given in order to gain entry into their ranks? And could he keep this hidden from the others? He smirked and shook his head at the last question. Of course he could. All he had to do was not mention it and ensure he received no injuries that he could not take care of himself and keep hidden. He smirked again. Not that any of those cats had a chance of getting a good enough hit on him.

"Thundertail! Quit it! Can't you just once let them see me as, well, ME!"

"If I let that happen, they'd all see the nappy little bastard you really are. Now hold still!"

Darkpaw cringed slightly at the mention of the word "bastard". It was silly really, that a word could bother him so much. But it did. He hated that word. He tried to ignore it, but he did. Hating a word seemed silly, until he realized just how much of a weapon a word could be. It was like being hit. He hated being hit, but that in itself could be viewed as silly. It was just a quick pain. It went away soon enough and even the memory of it could be lost. But still, it was entirely easy to hate it. Words were the same way. It was simple to hate them because, while they might only hurt for a little while at a time, the fact that one had been forced to endure that pain was enough to make them hate it. Words, because the sound was embedded into ones memory unlike the pain of a blow, could hurt even worse and longer. But then, it still didn't make sense, in Darkpaw's opinion, to hate something that had no physical form. When Thundertail had said it, he hadn't felt angry at her, but at Tigerpaw even though there was no possible way he could have heard the tabby say it. But Darkpaw had been reminded of Tigerpaw saying it and that had been what had triggered his anger. So, Darkpaw concluded, it was not the word itself that bothered him, but the memory of what it had sounded like and how it had been meant and the feeling it had caused at the time. Thundertail had said it to Mudriver but only as a form of light and playful abuse, hence, Mudriver was not angry. Tigerpaw had said it to Darkpaw as a form of heavy abuse and that had proceeded to make Darkpaw infuriated. So it all had to do with the sound and way the word was meant and how one felt about the one saying it. Darkpaw shook his head. For such a useful weapon, understanding how words worked was incredibly difficult.

While all this thought had been going on, Thundertail had finally finished grooming her brother.

"Well, kit, what do you think?" Thundertail asked getting off her brother finally.

"Excellent," Darkpaw said as he viewed the silkiness of his mentor's coat once again. It was still strange to see Mudriver like this, but the attitude proved that it was defiantly the same cat.

"Now if he would just keep it this way," Thundertail mused shaking her head.

"I _told_ you, it's not me!" Mudriver explained in an aggravated tone.

"And _I _told _you_, it should be," Thundertail countered.

"It is a good look for you, Mudriver," Darkpaw added.

"HA! You see?! I told you!" Thundertail smiled in victory.

"_But_, no it's not really you," Darkpaw finished and Thundertail's smile fell, only to be adopted by Mudriver.

"Thanks, little buddy," Mudriver said shooting a cocky grin at his sister.

Thundertail rolled her eyes. "Whatever, what's done is done and there's no way you're messing that up before the gathering."

"As you wish," Mudriver said dramatically and bowed to his sister.

"Wow, Mudriver, you're not even gonna try?" Darkpaw asked in shock. He was sure his mentor would try _something_.

"Nope, I've tried it before and 1) it didn't work and 2) Thundertail nearly bit my head off for it," Mudriver explained.

"Damn right I did and I would have if Blackstar hadn't announced it was time to go," Thundertail snapped.

"Speaking of it being time to go, don't you think it's time we went back? Blackstar will be getting the clan ready soon," Darkpaw noted trying not to sound too eager as the prickling in his paws returned.

"Yeah I guess you're right. Hey, you wouldn't be too upset if we skipped training tomorrow, would you? I know you've been out for three days, but I'm gonna be exhausted when I get back. I promise we'll do whatever you want the day after, though. Combat, two on one, whatever," Mudriver promised.

"Yes!" Darkpaw said hoping not to sound too excited, "I mean, if you really think you'll be too tired," he added for good measure.

"Forget it, kid, this lazy bag of bones'll be asleep all day if he gets his way," Thundertail said nudging her brother, "I'll go out with you if you want though. Just say the word and I'm there."

"Thanks," Darkpaw said.

The three walked back into camp just as the sun was setting. Thundertail and Mudriver said goodbyes to Darkpaw and went to join the gathering cats. Windpaw caught Darkpaw's eye and flashed him a smile which he responded to with another small nod.

The clan filed out and Darkpaw watched them until the last tail disappeared into the darkness. He turned back to the now mostly empty camp. As usual, only a few warriors remained. Darkpaw counted three warriors plus himself, Tigerpaw, and Runningnose made six remaining behind. He strolled calmly to the center of the camp and picked out a mouse from the fresh-kill pile. He needed food, but he didn't want fullness to make him sluggish. A dark figure approached him as he enjoyed his meal.

"What do you want, Tigerpaw?" Darkpaw said without looking up. Even without the tabby paws in front of him to give away who it was, he knew no one else in the clan had any interest in bothering him.

"You're just going to eat our kill now without hunting, rouge?" Tigerpaw growled.

Darkpaw swallowed his most recent bite and straightened up to look the other tabby in the eyes. "I was training as a medicine cat today, Tigerpaw, I get a share same as I would if I had hunted. Tomorrow I'm back to a warrior apprentice and I'll hunt then. What about you, huh? You haven't hunted either and I saw you carry a nice fat rabbit back to the elders' den. Don't try telling me it was for Runningnose because I know exactly how much he eats and I know you wouldn't be sharing," he said coldly.

"It's different for clan members," Tigerpaw hissed, "Rouges, or even former rouges, don't count."

Darkpaw smirked. "I'll have to tell Blackstar that one, I don't know when he last hunted," he laughed.

Tigerpaw instantly realized his mistake. "That's not what I meant! Blackstar doesn't count! He's the leader!"

"My, my, my you have so many rules and exceptions, when does it stop?" Darkpaw asked mockingly.

Tigerpaw hissed in annoyance. "Just watch your step, bastard. I'm watching you." With that, Tigerpaw spun around and stalked back towards the elders' den.

"Oh, and Tigerpaw," Darkpaw called. Tigerpaw paused and turned around and Darkpaw grinned. "Nice face."

Tigerpaw looked like he was about ready to kill Darkpaw, but managed to control himself enough to turn back around and finish his walk to the den.

Darkpaw smirked and went back to his meal. He sensed another form approach him. It was larger and, judging by natural scent, a she-cat. This confused Darkpaw at first since he thought the only she-cats that would have any interest in him had gone to the gathering, but one more name he realized he had not heard called hit him.

"Oh shit, not you," he groaned not looking up, desperate to be wrong even though he knew there was no way he was.

"Vulgar little fucker aren't you," Snaketail hissed.

"Yeah it's a huge mystery where I get it from," Darkpaw said sarcastically as he raised his head to meet the eyes of his foster mother.

"You shut your mouth. You don't get a damn thing from me! You aren't my son," Snaketail spat.

"Well, seeing as your actual son died, I'd say that's good luck on my part." Darkpaw didn't attempt to dodge as a brown paw slapped him across the face sending him reeling back and almost off-balance.

"Do you have a death wish, you stupid bastard?" Snaketail hissed.

"No, momma, none," Darkpaw spat and this time fell under the resulting blow.

"I'll kill you!" Snaketail screamed and brought her paw down on the kit's head, but he had had enough and rolled out of the way.

Darkpaw took Snaketail's momentary surprise to his advantage and slammed into the she-cat's side, knocking her off her paws. Darkpaw stood over her and noticed that the other two warriors in the clearing had tensed up, watching his every movement. "Why did you come here?" he growled.

"I need a reason to walk around my own camp?" Snaketail growled back.

Darkpaw laughed. The high-pitched innocence and cold darkness chilled Snaketail to the bone. "Do you think I'm stupid, you abusive whore? You didn't just come here for no reason, you wanted something. You always fucking want something," Darkpaw growled his claws unsheathing as anger flooded his conscious.

"I saw what you did to Tigerpaw. It's only a matter of time now."

"A matter of time before what?" Darkpaw asked the cold tone not leaving his voice.

"Before you betray us all. I knew I shouldn't have let you live," Snaketail spat.

Darkpaw snarled and had to force himself not to attack the she-cat below him. Instead, he leaned down and whispered in her ear, "If I do that, force feed cats death berries, bring in dogs and rouges, try to take over the forest and kill a bunch of the cats as a result," he leaned in closer and dropped his voice lower, "I'm gonna kill you first. And you're not gonna die quick either. You'll see what happens if you really piss me off." Snaketail's eyes widened and Darkpaw stood straight again, a cruel smirk across his face. "But, that's only if I do. I mean come on, what the hell would I have to gain from that?" Darkpaw scoffed, his voice adopting a plastic playful innocence once again. "Goodnight, Snaketail," he said cheerfully before turning and walking to his nest.

"Darkstripe," she whispered under her breath as she watched him go.

Darkpaw laid calmly in his nest, a strange pleasure filling him. He had scared her, terrified her, and he hadn't even had to hurt her! Even the other two warriors had seemed wary of him. The control he was feeling over the others' emotions was causing a drug-like ecstasy to flood his system. It was a good thing he wasn't sleeping tonight because there was no way he would be relaxing now.

'_Now I just have to see if they can sleep,' _he thought to himself as he curled up in his usual position. He closed his eyes but did not relax. He kept focus on all of the remaining cats, waiting for them to fall asleep. Runningnose already had, Tigerpaw was drifting off, and the other warriors were in their nests. The wait for them to finally nod off was torturous, but they finally did and his excitement nearly caused him to jump out of his fur. After forcing himself to do one more check, he sprang thru his escape hole and took off thru the trees like he was on fire.

A short while later, Darkpaw arrived at his destination. T.J. and J.T. were not there to meet him this time, but he didn't need them. He knew where to go. He padded to the far side of the two-leg nest and back into the trees. He descended the ditch and entered the new clearing.

Cats were already starting to fill the place and more were appearing thru the trees. Lynn was in the center of the ring with her mate and sons. Darkpaw casually padded over to them. T.J. was first to notice him and brightened up immediately.

"Ah, my little friend, you returned!" he greeted Darkpaw warmly.

"Did you have any doubts, brother?" J.T. asked.

"Of course not! You were the one with doubts," T.J. cried.

"That's not true, I merely accepted the fact that he may choose not to come," J.T. explained.

"Well, he is here now. Does anything else matter?" Lynn interjected. The twins shook their heads in unison. "Good, now, I would assume you have made your decision then, kit," Lynn continued to Darkpaw.

Darkpaw nodded. "I want to join your ranks." Oh how he had been dying to say that!

"Very well, one simple test and your fate will be decided," Lynn said with a smile. Her fangs were as white as her fur was though Darkpaw was certain they had seen the blood of countless cats.

Past Lynn, Shadow's expression looked to have remained the same, but there was something different about his eyes. His cold blue eye and hard green one seemed to have a more questioning appearance. '_Do you think you will truly make it? Are you strong enough?' _they seemed to ask.

'_I know I am,' _Darkpaw responded.

Shadow's questioning eyes flashed approval, but the questions remained. He would require proof and Darkpaw intended to give it to him.

"What is my test? Or who?" Darkpaw asked turning back to Lynn.

"Simple, as I said before, it is to survive," Lynn answered.

"There's more to it. Tell me," Darkpaw demanded.

"Survive in the ring, with Cain," Lynn finished.

"Who is-?" Darkpaw was cut off as a hulking shadow engulfed him. He turned to see a huge brown tabby. His black stripes were jagged across his pelt and his long-ish fur stuck out all over. Darkpaw was momentarily reminded of Mudriver, but this tom was defiantly different than his fun-loving mentor.

"This is to be my victim?" the tom growled out with a mocking laugh in his deep voice. Darkpaw wondered if that was what thunder sounded like.

"Yes, Cain, and don't be fooled by appearances, this young tabby is strong. I have no doubts he will pass his test," T.J. said coming up behind Darkpaw.

"So you say, T.J., but you barely made it out alive if I recall correctly, and you were much bigger than this little scrap," Cain said in his laughing voice.

T.J.'s ears laid back and he scowled. Darkpaw for the first time noticed a long, jagged scar running across the young tom's back close to his neck. If a strike like that was positioned correctly and was strong enough, it would be more than enough to kill a fully grown cat.

Doubt touched Darkpaw's mind for the first time. What was he getting himself into? If he didn't manage to somehow get the upper paw with Cain, he was done for. There was no question in his mind that even T.J. would sit back and watch him die in the ring. He shook the thoughts forcefully out of his head. This was what Cain wanted. He had to stay confident. Never stop thinking, planning, watching.

"If you two don't get moving, we will never find out now will we," Shadow said. The three toms turned him and nodded.

"See you in the ring, scrap," Cain smirked before turning and walking to the far crate.

"Come on," T.J. whispered to Darkpaw and led the little tabby to the other crate. "Don't let him get to you. He feeds off other cats' fear. Don't give in to him and he has nothing, do you understand?" T.J. said as they approached Darkpaw's prison.

Darkpaw nodded and prepared to enter the door at the front but was stopped by T.J.

"No, not there, you enter from here now," T.J. said directing Darkpaw to the side of the crate. T.J. lifted the cover slightly and Darkpaw saw another door. T.J. nodded and he entered before T.J. locked him in and pulled the cover down again. "You will still exit from the front, ok?" T.J. explained.

"Got it," Darkpaw said struggling to keep his breathing steady.

"Good luck," T.J. whispered so quietly that Darkpaw barely heard him.

Lynn's voice rang thru the clearing, "Welcome back my friends, my children. A few days ago, I showed you the forest kit my sons brought to me. We gave him the option to return, and he did." A loud cheer rose up from the group. "Are you ready to see what he can do?!" Lynn shouted and the cheers rained down again.

Darkpaw did his best to relax in his small prison. His eyes opened and he got a clear view of Cain smirking at him from the other crate. Pure murder was written across the darker tabby's features. Darkpaw did his best to look confident, but he could not deny the fear welling up in him.

'_Don't give in to him and he has nothing,' _T.J.'s voice rang in his mind.

"Calm down," he ordered himself, "He doesn't have a chance of getting you. You could kill him if you wanted to. He's just another cat, he hurts and dies just like any other cat." His confidence began to return. The image of Snaketail looking up at him in fear, Tigerpaw's wrecked face, the surprise on Windpaw's face when he came so close to killing her; the memories flashed in his mind and a devious grin spread across his face. He looked up quickly and captured Cain's wild eyes with his own frozen ones.

"_DIE!!!"_

With a clang, both crates were wrenched open and the two tabbies raced out into the clearing…

_

"Hey guys! What's up?" Dawnpaw said cheerfully as she approached Mudriver and Thundertail at the gathering.

"Not much," Mudriver said smiling back to the young she-cat.

"Where's Tigerpaw?" Nightpaw asked looking around and not seeing the confident tabby anywhere.

"He hurt himself training." "Rats." Mudriver and Thundertail responded simultaneously. The siblings looked at each other then back to the confused RiverClan apprentices.

"He was training…near the two-leg dump and was attacked by rats. Nothing major, he just needs to stay in camp for a few days," Thundertail lied.

"That's terrible!" Dawnpaw cried.

"Yeah he's pretty scarred up," Mudriver added looking around the clearing. He had no way of knowing what explanations other cats might have come up with. Damn Blackstar for not discussing this with them beforehand!

"So, will he be here for the next gathering?" Dawnpaw asked.

"Um, maybe, I would think so," Mudriver said.

"So he doesn't have any infections?" Nightpaw asked.

"Nope, lucky little bastard," Thundertail answered quickly.

The gathering started and the siblings were spared further "explanations". Mudriver sighed in relief and thought about his secret apprentice sleeping quietly back at camp…

_

Darkpaw grunted in pain as he was thrown to the ground once again by the heavy tabby paw. His start may have been confident, but Cain was much more solid than the other cats he had faced and getting a good hit on him was ridiculously hard. Time after time, Darkpaw had been swatted about by the enormous clawed paws. He figured this must be what a monster would feel like if it hit you. The breath was knocked out of him and he was struggling to catch it as he ducked and dodged away from the huge tom.

"You can't win. Just give up now and maybe I won't kill you," Cain laughed.

Darkpaw was dizzy and tired, but he was far from quitting. "How about you take that offer and shove it up your ass!" he shouted and barely managed to dodge the next swipe.

"You know, T.J. brought another kit here, not long before you arrived. A pretty little gold she-cat, not much bigger than you. She was confident, like you are. She was so sure she could beat me. You should have seen her smile. Would you like to know what happened to her?" Cain asked.

"Enlighten me," Darkpaw said sarcastically, not pausing for a second, knowing that as soon as he did, Cain would be upon him.

"I killed her!" Cain howled as he took another leap at Darkpaw but missed, "Made her gold pelt turn red, I did. Oh and her scream, even prettier than her smile. I made it ring out thru this whole clearing, it echoed for days." Cain laughed cruel, dark curls of laughter as he recounted his deed to the kit before him.

"Are you gonna attack me? Or just talk me to death?" Darkpaw hissed. He launched himself at Cain and managed to just miss the sharp claws, landing behind the great tom. He hissed again and jumped onto Cain's back, digging his fangs and claws into any available flesh, desperate to find a weak point.

Cain growled and tried to bat Darkpaw off, but Darkpaw was too slippery. Tiny fangs tried his ears, neck, and back. He grunted and rolled over, but Darkpaw jumped up, this time landing on his stomach. Darkpaw snuck a few swipes at the tom's brown belly, but four sets of claws now had full access to him. He had to jump away for his life, or at least his hide as Cain prepared to claw him to bits. The brown tabby took a little longer than a lighter cat might have to roll onto his belly and Darkpaw used this to launch himself once again at him. He clawed at Cain's face with his front claws and tried to hold down Cain's front paws with his own hind paws. This did not work, but as soon as Cain lifted his massive paws, Darkpaw vaulted off him easily.

"Cleaver, scrap, very cleaver," Cain laughed as he wiped some blood from his face.

Darkpaw did not respond. He was calculating. Cain was big, but he was slow. If he stayed stationary for too long, the claws could get him. Fangs didn't seem to come into play much with this tom, but he liked to talk. He meant to distract his opponent, but he could also become distracted himself. He wanted his opponent to feel scared, that was what gave him confidence. And confidence could be blinding. An idea struck Darkpaw and he nearly smiled at its brilliance. He shrank down, making himself as small as possible. His blue eyes grew wide as he stared, shaking, at Cain.

"There's no weak point. I can't beat him," he said loud enough for Cain to hear. He shuddered and turned away.

Cain laughed. "So, you're finally coming to your sense, eh, scrap? Haha took you long enough. Just hold still and I promise not to make it hurt…much." Cain approached Darkpaw confidently.

'_Closer. Come closer to me you bastard. That's right, I'm weak. Kill me. Kill me. Come here and kill me.' _The thoughts recited themselves in Darkpaw's head. Cain came closer, closer. Darkpaw was shaking and he could sense Cain smirk.

Cain raised up his paw, preparing to end this kit's life the same way he had done so many others'. T.J.'s scar proved just how powerful it could be. He prepared to bring it down on the cowering tabby's neck.

Before any cat could blink, Darkpaw twisted up, claws extended, towards Cain's face. He swung both his paws down on the tabby's head. The cuts ran from his ears all the way down his face.

Cain screamed in pain as razor-sharp claws scraped into his eyes, tearing them open. His ears were shredded but he could still hear the gasps from the crowed. All he could focus on was the pain, the overwhelming pain.

"Oh my god, the kit scratched his eyes out!" one cat cried.

"He tore his face off!"

"He's gonna die!"

The shouts rose up all around the clearing as Cain flopped helplessly in the dirt. No one came in to help him, they all just watched. Darkpaw looked on at the writhing cat before him. He could almost feel Cain's pain as he watched the tabby trying to rub the pain away on the dirt, then with his paws, but having no success, only managing to make it worse. Blood splattered all over the place and flecked Darkpaw's fur.

Cain screamed continuously as panic raced thru his body and mind. He couldn't see! He raised his head and tried to look around. There was nothing! Nothing at all! Just black and pain. Red pain!

Darkpaw and several of the other cats took a step back at what they saw. Cain's face was unrecognizable. It was completely destroyed. Dirt and blood were all one would see. Two gaping red and white holes where his eyes should have been stared out unseeingly at the crowed. His ears were ribbons of torn flesh and his nose was simply a bloody pulp.

"Help me! Somebody, help me!" he cried, but no one moved. They all just watched as Cain retched and convulsed onto the dirt. He coughed and choked as his body rolled onto its back and twitched. Even his spasms look painful until finally, it stopped. Cain's body went rigid then, went limp. His limbs flopped to the sides and his head slammed against the ground.

Silence fell upon the crowed as they all stared in disbelief at Cain's brutal and admittedly cruel death. Dozens of eyes then fell on Darkpaw who finally opened his own eyes. He had been watching, with a strange fascination, as Cain's life had been sucked out of his body. He had struggled for life, but hadn't been able to hold onto it. In the end, he had failed. His body turned black as all traces of life vanished.

"He's dead," Darkpaw said finally though no one was listening to him.

Lynn entered the ring calmly. She glanced down at Cain, but there was no real need to. Anyone could tell that no life existed in the tabby's body any longer. "Cain has been…obliterated. Darkpaw is victorious. He will be allowed to enter into our ranks as an apprentice," Lynn said looking at Darkpaw the entire time.

Darkpaw was staring still at Cain's body. The realization that he had taken another cat's life began to sink into his mind. He hadn't meant to, he had simply planned on blinding the tabby at most. His plan hadn't included this. He had killed him. He had taken another cat's most sacred possession…and he had liked it. A thick smile spread across his face. He could kill more than just prey! He could control not only other cats' emotions, but their lives! He approached Cain's body and was soon joined by T.J. and J.T.

"I will admit, I didn't think you would achieve _this_," J.T. said.

"Nor I. A murder even before your first true fight, just your test!" T.J. said and grinned at Darkpaw.

"Murder?" Darkpaw was not familiar with the term.

"You killed another being of your own species, it's called murder. Two-legs do it much more than we do, but it exists in all species," T.J. explained.

"You're a murderer now," J.T. added.

"Oh, and are you two murderers too?" Darkpaw asked.

"Yes, of course. All of us accept a few of the apprentices are murderers. Ginger, Tears, Crys, and Dusk I believe are the only ones who are not yet," J.T. said.

"Worth isn't either," T.J. told his brother.

"Oh yes, but you, Darkpaw, you are a protégé," J.T. said and smiled.

Darkpaw wasn't sure what that was, but he liked the sound of it. It had been meant as praise, so he willingly accepted it.

"Well done, kit," a deep voice from behind said. The three toms turned to see Shadow approaching them. "I am as surprised as the others on your skill. How do you feel?"

"Good," Darkpaw said.

"No guilt?" Shadow asked.

"Um…no none, why?" Darkpaw didn't see why he should feel guilty. Hadn't he done what he was supposed to do? Cain had been trying to kill him after all, he was simply defending himself. Once again, the kill hadn't been intentional. He had dreamt about killing cats and, while Cain was none of these cats, it felt good to live out his dream. But these things were to only be done here. Here was the only place it was to be acceptable. Darkpaw knew that what these cats were doing would not be accepted by his clan just as how some of the things his clan did would not be accepted here. They were different. Clan cats looked out for their clan, these cats looked out for themselves. They were two worlds that would never get along, but had somehow met in this kit.

"Nothing, sometimes young cats feel guilty after their first murder, that's all," Shadow said, "Come on, sons, we must carry the body away." The twins nodded and helped their father lift and carry the heavy body away from the ring.

Darkpaw watched them go before he turned back to see that all eyes were still on him. He slowly walked back to the place he had sat the last time he had been here, on the edge of the ring. The cats around him were all watching him with the same fascination. They weren't afraid of him, just surprised. Another grin touched Darkpaw's face as he awaited the next fight to begin.

He glanced down at his paws and saw the tips of them were red from dipping into the blood of Cain's eyes as he had raked down his sockets. His claws were also bloodied and blood had splattered across his face and chest. With a certain elegance to him, he began to wash away the foreign liquid from his paw. It was bitter and left a horrible metallic taste in his mouth that varied greatly from prey, but he would not remain dirty.

T.J., J.T., and Shadow returned from their job and sat beside Darkpaw. He suddenly felt the rough tongues of the twins on him as they washed the blood from his harder to reach chest, shoulders, and even face. He closed his eyes and purred at the service, glad he would not have to continue to taste the wretched stuff. The twins finished their task and Darkpaw shook his fur back into place.

"Thanks," he said.

"Don't thank us," J.T. said with a smile.

"Yes, it's customary for a kit to be cleaned of his first kill's blood by his parents, but since we are the ones who brought you here, we work just as well," T.J. added.

"Where are your parents anyway?" J.T. asked.

Darkpaw thought for a moment. Should he count Snaketail? No, of course not. That bitch was nothing to him but a nuisance. "Dead," he answered finally, "murdered…"

**Ok I'm getting the "many people will hate me for this" vibe. I'm sorry but it has to happen! Remember, Darkpaw has never been taught that murder is a bad thing and he didn't do it intentionally. Don't hate me! Review por favor! Me likey the reviews woot woot!**


	15. Chapter 14

Darkpaw didn't think he had ever been so sore in his life when he staggered back into his nest later that night. The rest of the clan still had not returned and the cats staying behind were of course still asleep. He flopped into his rough bed but didn't curl up since every move he made only made the pain sharpen. As he closed his eyes he could feel his abused muscles throb with his pulse but still managed to fall asleep.

When he awoke the next day he was just as sore if not more so. The sun had risen to sun high and the brightness of the camp deeply contrasted that which his clan's name would suggest. He got up and stretched tentatively before padding over to the fresh kill pile. He wasn't hungry, but he wanted to get a general idea of how much hunting might be expected of him today to ensure the clan was stocked up. The pile wasn't all that low but most of the clan probably hadn't eaten yet either.

The tabby looked up to see another orange tom exiting Littlecloud's den. The cobwebs had finally been removed from the apprentice's face and three long, jagged scratches running across his face were now clear to see. Darkpaw smirked, knowing it would scar and the shorter fur on Tigerpaw's face would make them always visible.

Tigerpaw turned and saw Darkpaw looking at him. He shot a meaningful glare at his rival apprentice and Darkpaw simply kept his smirk. He knew Tigerpaw would not try to get back at him now, not when he had training to return to and had so freshly gotten off of punishment, but another time would come where the two tabbies would clash and then need to be broken up and likely punished. But, since now was not the time for that, Darkpaw walked to the camp exit to take care of his hunting for today as Gingerstripe came to collect his son and apprentice.

Tigerpaw looked up at his father. Gingerstripe had never been a cat to show much concern for anyone, but there was a hint of sympathy in the tom's eyes as he looked at his son's torn face. But in a flash, it was gone and Gingerstripe simply turned, gesturing for Tigerpaw to follow.

"You have catching up to do," he said as he led his apprentice into the forest.

"I know, but it won't take me too long," Tigerpaw replied confidently.

"I'm sure, but don't become cocky. Too much confidence can cause you to loose clear sight of what you are and are not capable of," Gingerstripe said stopping finally and turning back to Tigerpaw.

"Yes Gingerstripe." Tigerpaw dropped into a crouch before launching himself at his mentor's throat.

Gingerstripe sidestepped the attack and Tigerpaw landed on his paws behind him. The smaller tabby turned to face his mentor quickly, still battle-ready.

"Now what gave you the impression that we would be going straight into your battle training?" Gingerstripe chided.

Tigerpaw hung his head. "I'm sorry, Gingerstripe," he apologized and was caught completely off guard as his body was thrown into the air. He still hadn't fully processed what had happened as he landed hard on his stomach in the prickly grass. He looked up in surprise at the other orange tom before him.

Gingerstripe smirked at his apprentice. "A warrior is always ready," he sneered and rushed Tigerpaw again.

Tigerpaw quickly lept to his paws, this time prepared for the attack and trying to keep a smile from spreading across his face. The scars were stiff and every expression he made was felt, but he had to focus. Ignoring the fascinating new feeling on his face, he jumped at Gingerstripe.

Darkpaw watched this all happen from the shelter of a nearby bush. He wasn't sure why he was spying on his rival training, but there wasn't much else to do. He noticed the similarities between the pair's interactions and his own interactions with Mudriver. Gingerstripe seemed a little more serious though. Darkpaw saw that the largest tom's claws always seemed unsheathed the slightest amount whenever he struck out, but they were always sheathed completely before he hit his son.

Tigerpaw was formidable, but Darkpaw couldn't help but feel he was still better. The patchy shade on his pelt made for strange feelings on his fur. Spots of cool and cold covered him like his stripes. A small breeze caused him to shiver slightly. Deciding he had better leave before he was found, he crawled silently out of his hiding place.

_

"Damn where is everything?" Darkpaw asked himself as he padded thru the tall grass. Prey was becoming scarcer and scarcer as the weather became colder and it was making Darkpaw frustrated. Even with use of his gift he had only managed to catch a few pathetic pieces of prey.

He suddenly froze as he heard something land in the grass. He crouched down and kept his body still even though his muscles still protested his movements. Whatever it was, it sounded big. Deciding it would be best to find out what this was before jumping it, Darkpaw closed his eyes. A small feline figure came into view amongst the dying grass. Darkpaw grinned as he recognized Windpaw. She obviously hadn't noticed him yet and was having equally poor luck on her hunt.

Feeling bored, Darkpaw decided to have a little fun. He intentionally brushed his tail noisily against the grass. A quick check showed him that he had managed to get Windpaw's attention. He stayed low so that she would not realize what and who he was until too late. He rustled his tail again and she began to come a little faster.

'_Come on closer, closer,' _he found himself chanting in his head. He was impressed by how quiet she was managing to stay but there was the faintest sound from her soft fur brushing against the grass. Just as Darkpaw felt her preparing to jump on him, he sprang from his place and landed squarely on the she-cat's shoulders.

Windpaw yowled in surprise and immediately began thrashing and swiping at her attacker. A silver and black tabby rolled off her laughing hysterically. She instantly recognized him though the laugh threw her off a little bit.

"Darkpaw!" she cried.

"Oh shit you should have seen your face!" Darkpaw howled and laughed even harder.

Windpaw shook off the surprise from the attack, but seeing Darkpaw laughing and joking around like this concerned her a little.

"Are you feeling ok?" she asked approaching him cautiously.

"Yeah I'm fine," Darkpaw said finally regaining his composure and standing again.

"It's just that, well, you don't laugh," Windpaw admitted.

"That's not true. I've laughed before, just not often. That was hilarious though," Darkpaw said with a grin.

This still seemed very strange to Windpaw, but she also wasn't about to let this puny tabby get away with scaring her like that. With a mischievous grin, she launched herself at Darkpaw.

Caught off-guard, Darkpaw was thrown down and pinned. He struggled and grunted beneath Windpaw, but it was no use, she was heavier than he was and, being nearly twice his age, that made sense. He still felt foolish though. Just a few hours ago, he had killed a fully grown cat that could have crushed Windpaw with one step, and now he couldn't escape her. Granted the circumstances were different, but Darkpaw still felt embarrassed.

"Let me up!" he ordered finally deciding there was no way he would be able to lift her off.

Windpaw thought about it, but then just smirked. "First apologize for tricking me then jumping on me," she said.

"What! Why would I do that? And how do you know I didn't just mistake you for prey too?" Darkpaw said defiantly.

"Come on, Darkpaw, there's no way I'm buying that. Just say you're sorry and I'll let you up."

Darkpaw struggled again but his limbs screamed protests every time and he couldn't do a thing. As if to torment him further, Windpaw sat down on his stomach. Darkpaw coughed as the air was forced from his lungs briefly.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry I jumped on you," he grumbled.

"Say it like you mean it!"

Darkpaw glared at Windpaw. This she-cat could really get on his nerves, but there seemed to be no other way. He sighed and lifted his head to look into her eyes. "Windpaw, I am sorry I jumped on you," he said as sincerely as he could.

Windpaw continued to stare at him for several moments before having to shake herself to regain her proper thoughts. "There, that wasn't so bad, was it?" Windpaw said getting off him.

"Yeah yeah yeah, it was still hilarious," Darkpaw shot before dodging a swipe and racing off into the grass again.

_

Darkpaw walked back into camp not long later carrying only two mice and a sparrow. He dropped them on the fresh kill pile and began to make his way back to his nest.

"Hey, Darkpaw, what's up?" a cheery voice called from behind.

Darkpaw turned and saw his mentor walking towards him.

"I was just going back to my nest, there's nothing out there today," the tabby said.

"That's what happens. Damn you look tired, didn't you sleep last night?" Mudriver asked.

"Yeah I mean, I sorta stayed up late and I guess I didn't get enough sleep. I'll go take a nap right now," Darkpaw yawned.

"Ok you do that. And make sure you're rested tomorrow, we have training to do!" Mudriver called as Darkpaw padded to the apprentices' den.

Darkpaw reached his nest just as another tabby walked up. Tigerpaw and Darkpaw glared at each other as they went their opposite ways. Neither of them said a thing because their eyes said it all. They would not clash with their differences now and maybe not tomorrow, but it would happen again. It had to.

_

"That's it, that's it keep moving. Don't let me get an opening because if I do…" Mudriver darted forward and crashed into Darkpaw's side, knocking the light tabby off his paws and rolling several feet.

"Ouch," Darkpaw groaned as he got up. It had been a couple weeks since the gathering and his test so his muscles had healed, but now that Mudriver insisted he work more on his defensive moves, he was beginning to wonder if the pain would return.

"Yeah see, you're not so badass if you're not the one starting the fight, are ya?" Mudriver said as he watched Darkpaw pick himself up. "Offense and defense are two very different areas. If you are good enough, keeping an offensive position is easy, but once you get into defense, it's completely different," the grey tom lectured.

"Got it. Let's go again," Darkpaw said standing ready.

"Alright." Mudriver ran at Darkpaw again.

Darkpaw dodged to the side and ducked under a swipe. He reached to swipe at Mudriver, but Mudriver's swipe was stronger and when the two clashed, Darkpaw was sent spinning. As soon as his back was turned to Mudriver, the grey warrior shoved him and Darkpaw sprawled out on the dirt.

"Ok time to learn a move," Mudriver said as Darkpaw picked himself up again. "Now, when you get into a position like that with a cat stronger than you, don't actually swipe. Fake it. Go as if you are going to swipe but back out of it and instead get out of the way. That way they aren't facing you anymore and you can get your own hit in. Got it?"

Darkpaw nodded.

"Good, now let's see." Mudriver backed up before jumping at Darkpaw again.

Darkpaw dodged to the side again and ducked. He reached as if he were going to swipe, but instead rolled out of the way and slammed into Mudriver's side, causing the bigger cat to stagger a few steps.

"Nice," Mudriver praised.

The two toms continued practicing for the better part of the day before it was decided that it was about time Darkpaw hunt and get back to camp since it was his turn to care for Runningnose

Hunting was no better and Darkpaw was ashamed that he had achieved so little when the fresh kill pile was getting smaller. He picked out a piece and carried it to Runningnose.

"Getting cold, ain't it, apprentice?" the elder said as Darkpaw approached and began to clean out the den.

"Yeah, I didn't know it ever got this cold," Darkpaw agreed. He had been born when the weather was much warmer and the cooling caught him slightly off guard. He had placed much more moss in his nest to ensure he kept warm.

"Oh it'll get colder. Just wait until it starts snowing, then you'll be freezing your stripy little tail off."

"Snow?" Darkpaw did not know what snow was, though he had heard mention of a cat with snow in their name when he had been passing by a conversation once.

"Oh right, I keep forgetting you've never seen snow…or even rain for that matter."

Darkpaw shook his head.

"Well rain is little drops of water falling from the sky when it's cold and snow is similar to that, but it's white and small and even colder. It's hard to explain, but it's beautiful when you see it. Just wait, it'll come," Runningnose said.

The idea of water falling from the sky seemed a little strange to Darkpaw, but he didn't mention it. Runningnose was much older and wiser than he was and if he said it happened, it probably did.

"I'll go get you some more moss, Runningnose, so it's not as cold," Darkpaw said before walking out of the den.

When he finished fully padding Runningnose's nest with the moss, he stepped back.

"Thank you, Darkpaw," Runningnose said.

"Was there anything else you needed?" he asked.

"No, you're free to go."

Darkpaw dipped his head and left the den. Thoughts of the ringfighters began to dance in his mind. He hadn't returned though he had wanted to. The fear of getting caught when the whole camp was full and guarded kept him in his nest at night. He could get away, he had before, but it was a risk he had not yet convinced himself to take.

"When should I go back?" he whispered to himself as he settled into his nest. He had considered leaving during the next gathering would be a possibility, but he would be six moons by then and the chance of Blackstar taking him this time was larger. Mudriver and Thundertail had both predicted that the next gathering would be his first and he couldn't help but feel nervous. After all, if all the forest were as prejudice as most of ShadowClan, Darkpaw might be dead before reaching seven moons. He shivered, whether from the cold or the thought of being torn to shreds by who knew how many cats or both he did not know.

He curled up tighter in his nest and his stomach growled. With a glance at the fresh kill pile, he considered what might be a suitable share since Blackstar had stated previously that times would be harder and now was not the time for cats to overeat or be wasteful. Darkpaw was still small and skinny and had, at one time, gone for days without eating, but as he had gotten a little older and realized that he did, in fact, have a couple friends, eating had once again become a necessity. Of course skipping a day wouldn't hurt anything since any of the clan could do it, but Darkpaw was really hungry today and times weren't really that bad yet. Deciding he might as well enjoy eating freely while it still lasted, he walked over to the fresh kill pile and picked out a small mouse.

As he settled down next to his nest to eat, another cat joined him. He glanced up to see Windpaw eating the sparrow he had caught and laying right next to him as though it were perfectly normal. She actually didn't seem to be paying any attention to him at all. Finally deciding the silence was slightly unnerving, Darkpaw spoke.

"Um, Windpaw, what are you doing?" he asked.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm eating you fool," Windpaw said frankly.

"Yes I can see that but what I mean is what are you doing eating here?" Darkpaw explained.

"It's a free forest, isn't it? I can eat wherever I want," Windpaw sniffed.

Darkpaw rolled his eyes. Honestly this she-cat got on his nerves sometimes…most of the time. "Ok then, why do you want to eat here?" Darkpaw sighed. Hopefully she would find no more loopholes.

"Why not?" Windpaw countered.

Damn. "Well, because I'm here and your brother probably wouldn't-"

"Oh for StarClan's sake can we shut up about my brother?! I've already told you he doesn't control what I do!" Windpaw snapped and Darkpaw was forced to recoil.

"Ok, ok jeez I get it, no need to yell," Darkpaw said. Windpaw didn't seem to be understanding the full picture here. Of course Tigerpaw didn't control her, but he tried his damnedest to and he also did his damnedest to control Darkpaw and that normally led to dangerous confrontations. Tigerpaw's scars were proof enough of that.

Windpaw seemed to have read his thoughts, though perhaps not clearly. "What are you scared of Tigerpaw or something?" she asked in a slightly condescending tone.

"What!? Fuck no! I just don't feel like dealing with him that's all. And I'd figure you wouldn't want me to either after the last time," Darkpaw said.

"Hey whatever he brings on himself is his problem, not mine. I don't care what you two do to each other to be honest. Your little feud thing is between you and him, leave me out of it."

"Technically it's sorta between me, him and Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw," Darkpaw corrected knowing those two would follow Tigerpaw into anything.

"Oh those guys just follow Tigerpaw's lead. Thicketpaw's just an annoying fangirl and Speckledpaw has been his "best friend" for a really long time," Windpaw said dismissively.

"Ok whatever you say," Darkpaw said not in the mood for arguing and figuring Windpaw really did have a bit of a point.

The two apprentices finished their meals in silence, neither of them knowing what to say now. It was getting late and they eventually said 'goodnight' to each other and went to their respective nests.

As Darkpaw curled up in his nest, he remembered the warmth and softness of Windpaw's. It was undoubtedly warmer in the apprentices' den, but Darkpaw knew better than to risk a big confrontation in there. It didn't matter now anyway, his fur was growing thicker and the cold was slowly being shut out. Darkpaw closed his eyes and waited for the dome of warmth caused by his body heat and insulated by the moss to cover him.

_

_The brown and black tabby shrieked as he writhed in the dirt. Darkpaw looked on, a cruel smirk plastered across his face. Blood spilled and ran in all directions, lapping around the apprentice's paws._

"_He's going to die!"_

"_The kit killed him!"_

_Darkpaw watched and listened, his paws growing wet with blood. And the blood kept coming. It drenched the entire ring. It soaked the cats on the outside. They shrieked and took off but the blood followed them in waves. Darkpaw realized it was rising, snapping at his chest and covering his legs. He looked for a place to escape but everything was covered in blood. The entire area was flooded._

_Darkpaw coughed as the blood jumped into his mouth, the sour taste attacking his tongue. He was alone now. There was nothing, nothing but black above and a sea of blood around him. The other cats, the trees, the ring, it had all disappeared leaving only him in the sea of dark red. Darkpaw began to panic as he could no longer touch the ground. He kicked and clawed to stay on the surface as more blood splashed over his face, getting in his eyes, nose, and mouth. He didn't know what to do and he was becoming tired. The waves of blood crashed down on him, forcing him below the surface for several panic-filled moments. His fur was soaked and plastered to his body. He coughed and sputtered as he struggled to stay where he could breathe._

"_Help!" he shouted but he knew he was alone. "Someone help me! Momma!!!" _

"_Murderer."_

"_Killer."_

"_Monster."_

"_Assassin."_

"_Who's there?" Darkpaw called to the unknown voices, "Show yourselves!"_

"_Monster."_

"_Killer."_

"_Murderer."_

"_Murderer."_

"_Murderer."_

_With each chant of 'murderer' Darkpaw began to become more and more tired. His will to stay up was being overridden by exhaustion. He panted and struggled, but blood was floating into his mouth. He snapped back to reality just long enough to cry out one more time._

"_MOMMA!"_

"_Murder."_

"_Murder."_

"_Murder."_

_Darkpaw's head sank below the surface and his eyes closed._

"_Murder…"_

_

Darkpaw gasped as he snapped awake, panting. He heard someone laughing and he quickly looked in the sounds direction. A scarred tabby was snorting with laughter not far from where Darkpaw lay.

"Momma! Momma! Save me, momma, I'm gonna die!" Tigerpaw laughed as he mimicked Darkpaw's voice.

Darkpaw felt his body grow hot and his claws unsheathed, but Tigerpaw wasn't done.

"Your mom didn't want you, no one wants you. That's why you're here, bastard. No matter how much you cry, your "momma" isn't gonna come back for you, got it?" the orange tabby snorted, "Crying for your mother, you'll never make a good warrior, you're pathetic."

"I'll make a better warrior than you," Darkpaw retorted.

Tigerpaw stopped immediately. "What did you say?" he growled.

"You heard me. I'll be a million times the warrior you could ever be," Darkpaw hissed.

Tigerpaw walked up to Darkpaw and the silver tabby immediately rose up to look his rival in the eyes. The two were nose to nose glaring at each other, hatred in their eyes.

"What do you say we just test that little theory right now then?" Tigerpaw said unsheathing his claws.

"Sounds like a good idea to me."

Both apprentices turned around to see Blackstar approaching.

"B-Blackstar?" Tigerpaw asked unsure he had heard right.

"You heard me. Both of you go get your mentors right now," the white tom ordered.

Darkpaw and Tigerpaw immediately took off to find their mentors. As he ran, Darkpaw thought.

"_So the showdown has finally come, huh? Well this is an unexpected twist." _He made his way to the warriors' den, discovering that he and Tigerpaw had the same idea.

"Gingerstripe? Gingerstripe, are you in here?"

"Hey, Mudriver, Blackstar wants you."

The two requested toms walked calmly out of the den unintentionally side by side.

"What is it, Tigerpaw?" Gingerstripe asked his son with a glance at the other tabby.

"What's up, Darkpaw?" Mudriver asked.

"Blackstar wants to speak with all of us," Darkpaw answered.

"About what?" Gingerstripe asked Tigerpaw.

"I don't know, but I don't think we should keep him waiting," Tigerpaw said and the two apprentices led their mentors back over to Blackstar.

"Blackstar, what's this about?" Gingerstripe asked as they got to the leader.

"I'll tell you in a moment, first follow me," Blackstar said and led the small group out of the camp. When they reached the tree by the two-leg dump, they stopped.

"Now will you tell us what's happening?" Mudriver asked.

"It has come to my attention, that Darkpaw and Tigerpaw here have a little unintentional rivalry going on. They want to see who's going to be the better warrior," Blackstar explained.

"That's not true! I know I'm better, I just don't think this rouge bastard should even get a chance!" Tigerpaw interrupted but cowered instantly once Blackstar was suddenly before him glaring down at him.

"What have I told you about that, Tigerpaw?" Blackstar hissed, "We do not call our clanmates rouges."

"But he-"

"HE is in this clan whether you like it or not and, being part of the clan, he is you clanmate, understand? You do not decide who is and isn't ShadowClan, _I _do. I can give that right to anyone I choose and I can take it away just as easily." The last statement sounded dangerously like a threat and Tigerpaw gulped. Blackstar backed up and immediately regained his composure. "Now, as I was saying, if these two want to see who's better then I suggest we let them. Whoever wins this will be considered the better apprentice until they become warriors and the loser either has to accept that or declare a rematch for a later date."

"Blackstar, forgive me, but do you really think this is necessary?" Gingerstripe interrupted.

"Yes, Gingerstripe, yes I do because you seem otherwise incapable of modifying your son's actions yourself in some other way and, since I've already tried numerous times, we are doing it this way, unless of course you have a better idea?" Gingerstripe seemed to shrink under Blackstar's hard gaze.

"No, Blackstar, please continue," Gingerstripe finally gave in.

"Thank you, now after this fight, there is to be no more brawling for any reason unless I give permission, understand? If you have something you need to settle, come to me and I'll work it out. Any questions?" Darkpaw and Tigerpaw shook their heads. "Good now get ready."

The adult toms backed out of the way as the two apprentices faced each other. Tigerpaw and Darkpaw backed a few paces away from each other as well to give themselves more room. This was the closest Darkpaw had been to Tigerpaw since the incident and he could now see clearly the scars trailing across the other tabby's face. Fur was no longer growing there making Tigerpaw's face look like trails thru grass from a bird's point of view. Darkpaw grinned and Tigerpaw growled when he realized what the smallest tom was looking at.

"Go ahead," Blackstar said and the fight began.

Darkpaw zipped out of Tigerpaw's way as the orange cat tried to bowl him over. Deciding to play on defense for a little, he didn't throw any blows. Tigerpaw's paws came flying all over but Darkpaw was too quick. Getting frustrated, Tigerpaw lunged forward and attempted to get a bite on Darkpaw's ears. Darkpaw hissed as the tabby's fangs contacted right at the base of his left ear and unsheathed claws dug into his shoulders. Reacting quickly and knowing he wouldn't win a wrestling match, Darkpaw raked his front claws at Tigerpaw's now exposed belly. Tigerpaw yowled as two sets of thorns tore at his flesh. Darkpaw knew better than to go full out, he couldn't hurt Tigerpaw too brutally and he defiantly couldn't kill him. ShadowClan cats were not to be killed, ringfighter cats were fair game. Once Tigerpaw backed off, Darkpaw took offense, swiping at the other apprentice's face. Tigerpaw was sure to keep well out of the way of those claws, knowing full well what they could and would do to him if they made contact.

Suddenly, Darkpaw was behind Tigerpaw, smacking and scratching at the orange hind legs. Tigerpaw jumped up and spun around, but Darkpaw simply moved as well, remaining behind his opponent. Then, Darkpaw launched himself onto Tigerpaw's back, digging his fangs into his soft neck fur. Tigerpaw hissed and tried to fight Darkpaw off as he felt himself loosing control of his body. In a last desperate attempt, Tigerpaw rolled over, managing to crush Darkpaw below him before the kit could move out of the way. Darkpaw released his victim and began clawing at Tigerpaw's back until Tigerpaw had rolled completely off of him.

Silence had fallen over this patch of the forest as the two apprentices glared at each other. Darkpaw was on his paws trying to catch his breath and Tigerpaw shook himself off. Tigerpaw made the first move again and Darkpaw was this time knocked over. The silver tabby hissed and twisted his body around, managing to swing his hind claws up and strike at Tigerpaw's neck. Tigerpaw backed off but swung a blow at Darkpaw's head as soon as the smaller tom got up. Darkpaw was knocked a little dizzy but still managed to dodge several more blows. Deciding to take a quick chance, Darkpaw held his body low and slithered quickly between Tigerpaw's front legs. Tigerpaw was confused at first, but when Darkpaw stood up quickly while underneath him, he was knocked onto his side. Darkpaw jumped onto Tigerpaw's ribs and prepared to bite at Tigerpaw's neck, but Tigerpaw met the attack with a blow and both apprentices rolled over. Neither wanting the other to have a chance at getting up, they were locked in a roll that was getting closer and closer to the adults.

Calmly getting out of the way, the three warriors continued watching as the tabby furball slammed into the tree.

Darkpaw dug his claws deeply into Tigerpaw's chest, hoping to keep the larger tom pinned against the rough bark. Both apprentices were on their sides with Tigerpaw jammed painfully between a root, the tree bark, and Darkpaw's horrible claws. Darkpaw was slightly lifted up, applying as much pressure as he could to Tigerpaw's body to keep him where he was.

"Blackstar we need to stop this. This is madness," Gingerstripe protested.

"Oh shut up, you're only saying that because Tigerpaw is at the disadvantage right now," Blackstar scoffed while watching the struggle with slight amusement in his eyes.

"Yeah! Go Darkpaw! Kick his stripy ass!" Mudriver shouted.

Darkpaw grunted as Tigerpaw tried harder to force himself up. The older tom's size and strength made Darkpaw's attempt at capturing him even harder as he felt his legs begin to give. Darkpaw pushed and pushed, but he could feel Tigerpaw slowly sitting up.

"Shit," Darkpaw said finally and sprang away as Tigerpaw bolted up.

"You can't beat me, bastard, I'm bigger, stronger, and smarter," Tigerpaw jeered.

Darkpaw just smirked. "But are you faster?"

Before Tigerpaw could react, a silver and black streak ran past his side, clawing the entire way. It gave the same treatment to his other side. His ears were smacked and batted harshly and his hips had several scratches before Darkpaw finally came to a halt right in front of him. Both Tabbies were panting, but Darkpaw wasn't done. He ran head on at Tigerpaw, but was met with a hard swipe to the side of his face. He skidded to the side a little, but merely changed directions and instead attacked Tigerpaw's side. Tigerpaw was knocked over with Darkpaw's full weight pinning down his neck, shoulders, and hips. Tigerpaw kicked and struggled, but every time he did, the vicious claws dug further into his flesh. Now that Tigerpaw was immobile, it was impossible for him to win.

"That's it, it's over. Darkpaw wins, now get off him," Blackstar said approaching the pile of ragged fur.

"What?! No way!" Tigerpaw crocked before Darkpaw had released the pressure on his neck. The pressure suddenly increased again as Darkpaw leaned forward.

"You got some way of getting out of this? Huh? Just take the loss like an honorable warrior you whiney son of a bitch," Darkpaw growled before backing off.

"All right, Darkpaw!" Mudriver said as he greeted his apprentice, "You sure showed him!"

Gingerstripe looked coldly down at Tigerpaw. Tigerpaw looked away shamefully but opened his mouth to speak.

"You have training to return to," Gingerstripe said in a hard tone before Tigerpaw could make a sound.

Tigerpaw simply nodded and followed his father away from the others. Before they disappeared back into the trees, Tigerpaw sent a rueful glare back at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw saw it and returned it. This was not over. It was for now, but the rematch would happen, and keep happening until one of them was unable to continue. Tigerpaw would only really need to hold the title of loser for a little while anyway since he was almost ready to become a warrior. But that didn't matter. This contest would not end when they were warriors, it would end when they were dead.

"Congratulations, Darkpaw," Blackstar said.

Darkpaw dipped his head. "Thank you, Blackstar, may I return to camp now?" he asked.

"No, you have training too, silly," Mudriver said with a grin.

"Ok, ok," Darkpaw said rolling his eyes.

"Oh don't give me that look. With speed like that, I think it's time we worked on endurance," Mudriver announced.

"Well you two enjoy that, I do need to get back to camp. The clan will start wondering where I am," Blackstar said and left the other two after a quick farewell.

"Hey Mudriver."

"What?"

"What do you think Gingerstripe is gonna do to Tigerpaw?" Darkpaw didn't know why it mattered, but his curiosity was endless.

"Oh I don't know. He won't be too bad I think. I mean, it is his son and he did put up a fair fight," Mudriver concluded.

"Ok," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"Now we have training to do!" Mudriver announced and forced a groaning Darkpaw to run.

_

Later that day, when the sun had already set, Tigerpaw finally returned to camp followed by his mentor. Darkpaw watched. He had returned himself quite a while ago even though the run had seemed endless. He noticed Tigerpaw's coat was a little more torn and he had a slight limp, but his eyes were hard and focused as he limped to the apprentices' den without saying a word to his expressionless mentor. He walked past Darkpaw and into the den without a word, glance, or any acknowledgement that the other tabby was there. Darkpaw said nothing either but nodded. Tigerpaw had had enough, for now. They weren't playing anymore…

**OMG I can't believe how long this chapter took! I have so little time to work on this damn story it's like AAAAHHHHH!!! Anyway at least I finally got it how. I didn't read it as thoroughly as the others because I want to get it in so if there are mistakes I'M SORRY!!! Now I have to go do homework. 'sobs silently'**


	16. Chapter 15

**YES! It's up! Sweet Mary it's finally up! And with new characters! Oh please don't hate me for taking so long. And please review so I will be motivated to work faster and even better! I love you all!**

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Flame- pale brown and orange tabby she-cat. Ringfighter.**

**Ruby- dark red she-cat with messy fur. Ringfighter.**

**Prancer- small, quick brown tom with bright yellow eyes. Ringfighter/kittypet.**

**Kuma- slender orange tom with red paws. Ringfighter/tester.**

**Magi- long-haired white she-cat with whiteish-blue eyes. Born completely blind yet has never lost a fight. Ringfighter.**

"Mudriver! Mudriver, can we stop now?" Darkpaw panted as he raced behind the bushy tail of his mentor.

"Less talking, more running!" Mudriver ordered and continued to run, flicking his apprentice's nose with his tail.

Darkpaw sighed and continued to run. It felt like they had been going on forever, but it probably hadn't been very long at all. He wasn't sure where they were, but they were defiantly still in ShadowClan territory, Mudriver was very particular about staying within the borders. Something about not wanting the other clans to think even less of ShadowClan if they didn't have to. Either way, Darkpaw wanted a change of scenery from the tall, dead grass and occasional tree or bramble patch.

"Mudriver what if we go into the two-leg dump?" Darkpaw suggested. He had never been in there before and, though it smelled horrible, it interested him. He had lost several kills to the tall, silver thing that separated the forest from the two-leg waste.

Mudriver stopped immediately and turned to Darkpaw, causing the tabby to crash into him. "Are you crazy?!" he shrieked, "Do you know what's in there?!"

"Obviously not," Darkpaw said testing his ears to make sure he could still hear.

"Rats! Nasty little fuckers and if they get a hold of you, you're stripy ass is screwed. Even senior warriors and leaders have lost lives to those devils," Mudriver explained.

"Why don't we rally the clan together and drive them out?" Darkpaw asked. While he knew no source of food should ever be obtained from there, it seemed ridiculous that his clan should be in fear of an inferior life form. After all, what was the difference between a rat and a mouse but size?

"Because there are more of them than us," the grey warrior said harshly, "Even ShadowClan wouldn't stand a chance."

This seemed highly unlikely to Darkpaw. While he was still bitter towards his clan for their unending hatred of him, ShadowClan seemed unstoppable. If there was a force that could cause, even these warriors to quake and steer clear, he had to know what it was exactly.

"Ok, Mudriver, do we still have training to do?" Darkpaw asked calmly.

"Let's see we've already done your combat and hunting for today and your run was pretty much over with anyway…no I think we can call it a day, once you do your hunting for the clan of course," Mudriver said.

"Ok so you go back to camp and I'll take care of my hunting. See you later?"

"See ya," Mudriver confirmed before taking off back to camp.

Darkpaw grinned. He would be hunting, but there was something else he wanted to hunt first. He used his nose and pinpointed which direction he would need to go in, in order to arrive at his destination.

Not long later, he was looking up at the disgusting waste heap left by the two-legs. He inspected the bottom of the barrier for any easier entrance than climbing, not wanting to exert more force than necessary for what he wanted to accomplish. He soon found a hole at the bottom and began checking its proportion to his body.

Suddenly, he saw something move. He looked up and saw a dark-grey form moving around the piles of rubbish. Whatever it was, it wasn't a cat and it was nearly twice his size. He backed up a little from the barrier. If that was a rat, and there were lots of them here, he might not actually want to mess with them. It suddenly sprang out from the hole and nearly latched onto Darkpaw's shoulder. He let out an involuntary yelp as the red-eyed thing raced around to attack him again.

"Damn it's quick!" he whispered as he jumped away. It pursued him and jumped on him, pinning him below its oddly-shaped body and prepared to bite down on the kit's shoulder. Darkpaw began to panic. He somehow managed to shove the thing off and sprang away again, but it followed him still. Its teeth protruded from its mouth as it opened its mouth to strike him. There was no way the small tabby could overpower it, he couldn't fight something with this shape at all. But then, he had never actually tried.

Gathering up his courage, Darkpaw slashed at the rat. There was a squeak, but it did little to deter the rat. It clicked its teeth and slithered up to Darkpaw again with full intent of ripping him to shreds even as its blood spotted on the ground. Darkpaw's ear twitched and he realized more were coming.

"Shit!" Not normally one to run from a fight, Darkpaw spun around and sprinted faster than he ever had in his life back to the tall grass. There he waited and panted, wondering if he was still being pursued. After several minutes of silence, he slowly creped out again.

There was nothing there. It was like nothing had happened. Now that he could think clearly again, Darkpaw's anger rose. No doubt, running away from that fight had hurt his ego badly. His claws flexed and he gritted his teeth, vowing that the next time he saw a rat, he'd kill it. Half of his mind told him to take it easy on himself seeing as he would have been badly outnumbered and outmatched, but it was overrun by the other half saying he should have died before running away like a scared kit.

'_But I am a kit,' _he thought, but quickly shook it away. He was a ShadowClan apprentice no matter what his age was. And, being an apprentice, it was time he went back to his duties. He walked back into the tall grass and began checking for prey.

"Anything but mice," he prayed quietly to himself.

_

Darkpaw wandered back into camp carrying three mice in his jaws. By some cruel trick of StarClan, that was all he could find. He practically spat them onto the fresh kill pile and started looking for Mudriver. He ended up finding Windpaw instead.

"Well look what the rats dragged in," she said as he approached.

Darkpaw froze. "Wh-what did you say?" he asked. Crud, did she know?

"Chill, jumpy, it's just an expression and you do look a bit riled up…phew and you smell horrible," the white she-cat said as they met half-way between the fresh kill pile and the apprentices' den.

"I don't like rats," he mumbled.

"Have you ever even seen one?" Windpaw laughed.

"Y-No," Darkpaw said, "I just know I wouldn't, that's all."

"Ok well jeez what were you doing? You smell like someone dragged you thru the dump and back."

"I just…had a rough day ok," Darkpaw grumbled hoping to chase Windpaw off with bitterness. As usual, it didn't work.

"Well come here, maybe some grooming will help," Windpaw offered and stepped closer to Darkpaw.

The tom stepped around her quickly and began to walk backwards towards his nest. "I can groom myself," he said quickly.

"I know, but let me help. Sheesh I won't bite," Windpaw countered as she advanced on him still.

"No," Darkpaw insisted but wasn't prepared when Windpaw knocked him into the apprentices' den and, with a short struggle pinned him down.

"Shut up and hold still," she ordered and began licking Darkpaw's dirty fur.

"We speak of this to no one," he growled.

"Deal," Windpaw said cheerfully and continued.

Darkpaw finally understood how Mudriver felt every moon.

Once Windpaw was satisfied she allowed Darkpaw to once again regain his paws. He stood up and shook out his short fur.

"There now, that wasn't so bad was it?" Windpaw asked.

Darkpaw would never admit it, but it had been somewhat relaxing. It had almost felt, dare he say it? Good! "Whatever, just don't do it again," he snarled and stalked out of the den.

On his way out, he nearly bumped into Tigerpaw. The apprentices scowled at each other. Tigerpaw looked like he was about to open his mouth to say something, but he decided against it and just pushed past Darkpaw and into the den. This was how it had been for the past week. Every time the two met, Tigerpaw would start to get riled up, but back down just as quickly and go his own way. He was done. Both of them were done. They didn't have time to waste on petty disagreements anymore. Tigerpaw would be a warrior soon and Darkpaw was sick of all the crap anyway. No, the next time these two fought, it would be for a reason. It wasn't about who was better anymore, it was just the fact that they could not get along. The tabbies would never be friends, never try to be friends, and didn't want to be friends. So they would exist, together, and try to ignore the other's presence as much as possible. But if a spark was lit and fed well enough, problems would erupt once again.

Darkpaw didn't mind that there would be no trouble with Tigerpaw today. He wanted to be as focused as possible. Tonight was important. He was finally going to return to the ring. The gathering was still about a week away and his training would be late tomorrow since Mudriver was on the dawn patrol. Darkpaw didn't need to worry bout being on any patrols because Blackstar was very intent upon keeping him out of sight no matter what until the gathering. While it was doubtful any clans would be anywhere near ShadowClan borders, Blackstar refused to risk it. Darkpaw would begin patrols _after _his first gathering.

Darkpaw curled up in his nest. The days were growing shorter and the nights longer so the sun was already setting. Checking to make sure he wasn't being approached, he slipped his paw into his hiding place and extracted his treasure.

"Give me luck," he whispered giving it a quick lick and returning it. He had been told by Mudriver that some warriors prayed to StarClan before a battle to give them the strength for victory. If StarClan was watching over Darkpaw, he highly doubted they would approve of his activities any more than ShadowClan.

The upside of longer nights and shorter days was that the clan fell asleep sooner and stayed asleep longer. The downside was that this occurrence apparently came when it was getting colder so traveling at night would be uncomfortable to say the least. Darkpaw didn't want to move from his nest by the time the clan was silent save for the guards. It was cold out there and his fur was so short and his nest was so warm, but he got up anyway and sprang into the forest.

His muscles twitched for the first few minutes of his run, but his body soon warmed up. His endurance training made itself useful now since he was not as out of breath when he reached the edge of ShadowClan territory. He found his way back to the bright clearing where a fight was already going on. He slipped down the edge and wound his way thru the crowd until he recognized T.J. sitting calmly at the edge of the ring watching the fight.

"T.J.," Darkpaw hissed, getting the black cat's attention immediately.

"Darkpaw!" T.J. said happily as said tabby sat down beside him. "I was beginning to wonder when you would return."

"Well I do have a duty to my clan," Darkpaw answered before looking back at the fight. He didn't know why, but he was surprised to see that it was J.T. who was fighting. It seemed silly to be surprised, after all, every cat here fought at some point. But Darkpaw just hadn't pictured any of T.J.'s family actually in the ring fighting despite knowing that they all had killed multiple cats in the ring. The information simply hadn't sunken in until now.

"You seem surprised," T.J. said voicing Darkpaw's mental monologue.

"It's just, this is the first time I've seen J.T. fight anyone that's not, well, me," Darkpaw explained.

"That's true. I am fighting soon, too."

"Who are you fighting?"

T.J. nodded his head in the direction of a pale brown and orange she-cat. "Her name is Flame. Beautiful, isn't she?" T.J. whispered.

"You mean you like the cat you are going to fight?" Darkpaw was confused. This seemed strange, even for the ringfighters. Why would T.J. agree to fight a she-cat he was attracted to?

"I don't just like her," T.J. laughed, "She's going to be my mate."

Darkpaw had to pick his lower jaw off the dirt before he could respond. "What do you mean?"

"In our society, if you wish to have kits with someone that is also a ringfighter, you must fight for it. It doesn't matter who wins, only that you both walk away from it. It's like a test of loyalty. If you don't get so caught up in the fight that you severely injure, or kill, the one you wish to be your mate, then you are fine for each other. If you do kill or nearly kill them, then you not only cannot be mates with them, and you are forbidden to have any mates at all in this society," T.J. explained.

Darkpaw thought about this. In some way, it made sense to him. The ringfighters were vicious and dangerous to everyone, but their mate was to be held sacred to them. "So, do you fight after that?" he asked.

"No, you may not fight your mate whether in the ring or out. If you do, you may be injured, driven out, or even killed. You will never see my mother and father fight, nor will you ever see Tears and Crys' parents fight. It is not permitted."

"Then, did Lynn and Shadow fight before they became mates?"

"That's how this tradition was started. When my mother and father met, she was wandering around outside and he attacked her from the bushes. Even though he was bigger and stronger and the fight should have been in his favor, she threw him down and prepared to kill him. But she didn't. After seeing her display of power, my father knew he wanted to have her and they became mates after vowing they would never fight like that with each other again."

"Wow." Darkpaw couldn't think of anything else to say. It was amazing to him. With how blood thirsty and dangerous all the ringfighters were, one would assume that they would be the same with their mates if not more so, but instead they were complete pacifists. Amongst all the confusion, it made perfect sense. "So is J.T. also fighting for his mate?" Darkpaw asked after realizing the dark red cat J.T. was fighting was a female.

"No, not yet. But in my opinion, he should be. He and Ruby get along perfectly together despite their fights. But he says he loves the fights and she does too and, since neither of them really want kits, they feel no need to become mates," T.J. said.

"So he won't kill her?"

"Not even on his own life and she won't kill him either, but they aren't afraid of getting close."

At that moment, J.T. snatched up Ruby by her scruff and slammed the she-cat's head into the ground hard. There was a choked gag and then it was silent. Lynn stepped out into the ring and looked down at the other, younger she-cat.

"Ruby is unconscious. J.T. is the victor," she announced.

J.T. took Ruby's scruff once again, gentler this time, and heaved half of her body over his back and carried her over to his brother. T.J. moved in to help him set her down. J.T. looked like he had red tabby stripes but Ruby's blood was only locatable by looking for matted, wet fur. And, since her coat was already a bit messy, even that was difficult. J.T. laid down next to her and began grooming her gently. She groaned and stirred slightly.

"Bloodrain? Bloodrain are you alright?" J.T. whispered in the she-cat's ear.

"I thought you said her name was Ruby," Darkpaw whispered to T.J.

"I also said my brother's name it J.T.," T.J. responded.

"Yes, Half-face, I'm fine," Ruby said with a weak smile without opening her eyes.

Darkpaw sighed and looked up at T.J. He was confused once again.

"Mates often give their partner a name that only they use. While my brother and Ruby are not officially mates, they are so close that they gave each other names anyway," T.J. said saving Darkpaw the trouble of asking. "And yes, Flame and I will give each other names as well once we have completed our ceremony," he added.

Darkpaw nodded and turned back to the fight now taking place. To his surprise, it was Ginger fighting a small brown tom. The tom's movements were quick and seemed to focus less on overpowering Ginger and more on disorienting her. And it seemed to be working. Ginger was getting increasingly frustrated with this and Darkpaw knew that something bad would happen if she didn't calm down.

Ginger shrieked and lunged at the tom again, but he moved with the speed Darkpaw had only known himself to possess and Ginger crashed into the dirt. The tom danced around her and pinned her face-down by her shoulders. She struggled and kicked under him in a desperate attempt to free herself, but the tom held her fast.

Just as the tom's jaws moved to clamp around Ginger's neck, she wriggled out from beneath his paws and slipped out between his hind legs. She reversed their positions and wasted no time going down for her kill-shot. As she reached his neck, she only grabbed his scruff and pulled up to signal that she had him but did not wish to take his life. Lynn stepped out and nodded, announcing that Ginger had been victorious in her battle. The tom was released and he padded back into the crowd.

"I've never known Prancer to lose so easily," J.T. said to his brother.

"Yes, it's true. He fights ferociously in his battles with other fighters, but I sense weakness in his heart for the kits." T.J. spat the last bit and glanced down at Darkpaw.

"Actually, I sense a weakness in his heart mainly for Ginger. But anyway, can you entirely blame him? He does belong to the two-legs, they make cats soft and…merciful," J.T. added.

"But aren't you two kittypets?" Darkpaw asked. He didn't mean to be rude, but the collars gave off that idea.

"Us?" T.J. laughed. "Not exactly. When my mother had us, she took refuge in the thing behind the two-leg nest where you first met her. While she was in there, some two-leg kits found her and took her inside their nest along with us. We were trapped in there for a few weeks until my mother saw us as fit to be able to make an escape. When Father raised an alarm outside, the kits saw him as well and rushed out to get him, but we raced out as soon as there was an opening and ran off with him. We still sometimes hide in the small nest, though, and accept the food they put out when times are hard. But they have to be _very _hard."

Darkpaw nodded in understanding.

Lynn's voice rang out. "I am pleased to announce to you all that a mating ceremony will take place for us tonight. My son, T.J., wishes to take Flame to be his mate. If they pass their test, they will be permitted such a right as is the law of our society."

Cheers rang out as Flame and T.J. entered the ring side by side. T.J. bent down and touched his nose to his mother's left flank while Flame did the same to the right. Lynn touched her nose to both Flame and T.J.'s forehead in turn and the two younger cats backed up. T.J. stepped forward now towards Flame and licked her forehead and she did the same to him. Once this was done, they separated and went to their crates.

Darkpaw watched this all with fascination. He had never seen such tender and caring movements in his life and he had never expected his first show of them to be from these cats whose whole live revolved around death and blood.

With a familiar clang, the cage doors were wrenched open and the two young cats sprang out. The way they carried themselves and looked at each other appeared to be the same as any other fighting cats at first glance. But upon closer inspection, it was clear in their eyes that they did not want to hurt each other.

T.J. made the first move and sprang at Flame, but when she moved to bat at him, he twisted out of the way and made a grab for her scruff. But Flame had spent many moons watching every aspect of T.J.'s fighting strategies and knew what he was doing. She spun around and slapped his jaw hard, raking her claws along his chin and turning his head with the motion of her paw. Flame sprang this time and slammed her body into T.J.'s shoulder, causing the equally sized tom to stagger a few steps. As Flame went to swipe at him again, he regained himself and ducked under her blow and came up with a bite to her chest. She hissed in pain and tried to pull out of his grip, but he held fast, trying to wrestle her down at this awkward angle. Flame managed to keep her feet and clawed harshly at T.J.'s shoulders until he finally released her. She lept away from him and then jumped over him when he tried to follow. He looked up and raked his claws along her belly as she sailed over, causing her to stagger badly when she landed. T.J. jumped on her back and pinned her down, but Flame was not so easily defeated.

The she-cat twisted her lower body in a miraculous show of flexibility and raked her hind claws along T.J.'s side. T.J. hissed and tried to make her stop by digging his claws further into her back, but she continued and finally gave a hard kick that threw him off-balance. The decreased pressure on one side of her back allowed Flame to flip over onto her back and throw T.J. completely off of her. The black tom tried to get his grip back on Flame before she could regain her paws, but when he did, she clawed and bit at his belly and neck, forcing him back off and she was quick to compose herself. She jumped at his chest and knocked him back. He lifted his front paws up slightly in his loss of balance and was unable to put them down again before Flame hit him with another upward swipe. She was forcing him to sit up and when he finally was, he was at a horrible disadvantage. He tried to escape by leaping to the side, but Flame overpowered the jump with a hard blow to his shoulder and he collapsed into the dirt. Flame instantly was on him, holding him down in much the same way Darkpaw had held Tigerpaw. Her mouth lowered, ready to end her suitor's life.

Flame licked T.J.'s cheek gently before backing off of him. T.J. slowly got up and smiled at his mate. He pressed his cheek to hers and they both purred.

"Flame and T.J. have passed their test. They will be allowed to become mates and are now bound by our law to never raise a paw to each other again," Lynn announced, but T.J. and Flame didn't seem to hear as they were still to busy nuzzling and purring. It didn't matter though, they knew.

Cheers rang out from the crowd and Darkpaw joined in. He had almost forgotten the reason the two were actually in the ring and had been concerned for a moment that T.J.'s life was about to end before his very eyes. The ritual he had just witnessed and the meaning behind it struck Darkpaw as being almost beautiful. It was a vow between the two that no matter what happened, they would never do anything to contradict their bond. It was a message who's significance would stay with the tabby as he grew into an older tom.

T.J. and Flame finally left the ring, but they did not approach where they had been before. They walked thru the separating crowd and off into the trees away from the rest. Darkpaw looked at J.T., confused.

J.T. only responded with a wink. "So did you want to fight tonight, Darkpaw?" the white tom asked.

"Yes," Darkpaw said.

"Then come with me." J.T. lightly licked Ruby's forehead before leading Darkpaw to the center of the ring. "Mother, Darkpaw wishes for a challenge," J.T. announced.

"Is that so?" Lynn said approaching the two toms.

Darkpaw nodded.

"Very well then, do you have anyone in mind?"

This time Darkpaw shook his head.

"I thought not. Who here would like to challenge this young apprentice?" Lynn called.

The crowd parted and two small figures stepped thru. A grey and brown tabby tom and a black and brown tabby tom came forward. Crys glanced side-long at his brother and Tears nodded.

"Lynn, we wish to both challenge Darkpaw…together," Tears announced.

"Do you now?" Lynn said with intrigue.

"Yes. We heard he can see without his eyes. We want to find out for ourselves just how powerful that is," Crys continued.

A murmur rose among the other cats. Clearly not all of them had heard, or believed about Darkpaw's gift.

Lynn looked down at Darkpaw. "Well, Darkpaw, do you accept this challenge?" she asked.

"With pleasure," Darkpaw said with a smirk.

The brothers snarled at him.

"Alright then, to your crates," Lynn ordered and the apprentices separated.

Crys and Tears fit easily into their crate side by side and they looked menacingly across at Darkpaw. It was clear that they were trying to focus all of their energy on him so as not to end up targeting each other.

Tears glanced at his brother. Not long ago, he had viciously attacked his brother in a fit of blind fury and Crys had done the same to him. They had never worked together in a fight before, but they had seen T.J. and J.T. do it a couple of times. It took a lot of discipline to not lose sight of who your opponent really was and not go out on a revenge tangent. If the brothers began fighting amongst themselves, they were done for. But the cage was doing its work on Tears' mental state and images of how Crys had hurt him and how he had hurt Crys in return flooded back to his memory.

Tears wasn't alone in his flashback. Crys was seeing the opposite side of the same fight. Tears had attacked him and would have continued attacking him if their parents had not intervened. He shot a glare at his brother and Tears returned it. This succeeded to make both tabbies angrier at each other since they both felt the other was in the wrong. Crys let out a small growl at his brother and Tears returned with a hiss.

Darkpaw watched as the discipline of the two brothers across from his began to break down before his eyes. They were obviously unpracticed and if they didn't get their wits about them soon, this match would be horribly one-sided. Seeing the shows of aggression put Darkpaw even more on edge as the walls of his crate bared down on him. He wanted this punishment to be over. Why did they always wait so long to let them out?! But Darkpaw new the answer. Far back in his depleting thoughts, he knew the reasoning behind trapping the opponents for an unneeded amount of time. It was to drive them to the brink to make them even more rabid so no other emotions would affect the fight. This made the mating ceremony even more amazing since somehow, the pair managed to weed thru the anger and remember their purpose and who it was they were fighting. Darkpaw knew that by the time he got out of here, he would be blind to who he was facing.

The doors were thrown open and the three kits entered the ring. Crys and Tears were batting lightly at each other but now that they were out they seemed to remember who their real target was. Darkpaw closed his eyes, making the sharp blue of them disappear visibly from the crowd.

Several cats murmured as they saw what he did. Some of them were excited. Others thought he was asking for death. Some were silent, putting their faith neither in Darkpaw or the brothers and simply waiting to see who walked out to decide whether this "gift" was fact or fiction.

The two younger tabbies took off in different directions, circling Darkpaw in the same way T.J. and J.T. had. Darkpaw stood calmly in the center of their circle and waited for them to make their move inward.

After completing one lap around their opponent, Crys and Tears shot straight in approaching him from the front and back. Tears jumped from behind while Crys kept running straight at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw smirked and rolled out of the way causing Tears to land on his brother and knock him to the ground. It was all the two could do to not begin fighting with each other right there. Darkpaw waited patiently, his tail flicking behind him in amusement. His eyes were still shut tight and he could tell the frustrations of both the kits were growing already.

Bringing themselves back into the fight, the brothers ran side by side at Darkpaw. Crys broke away from his brother and prepared to slam into Darkpaw's side while Tears tried to jump over and land behind the silver tabby.

Darkpaw turned and grabbed Crys' neck before they collided and swung around using the younger tom's body to knock Tears back. Darkpaw crouched and extended his claws before springing forward and landing on the ball of fur. He clawed at the young toms and he could hear them squealing and see that he was drawing blood.

Crys and Tears finally gained their paws and took off in separate directions, causing Darkpaw to collapse onto the dirt. They took this opportunity to try and pin down the silver tabby. But Darkpaw rolled onto his back and delivered a devastating kick with his hind claws to Crys' belly and caught Tears' neck, rolling on top of the smaller tom and holding him tightly by his throat.

Crys rolled on the ground in pain as blood oozed out of his stomach. He tried to build up the will to get up and help his brother, but every move he made was agony. Tears struggled with all his might to fight Darkpaw off on his own, but he was loosing air and Darkpaw's claws were shredding his shoulder. Finally admitting defeat, both apprentices lay still.

Darkpaw released his hold on the smaller tabby and opened his eyes. He looked up and saw that many cats looked shocked and impressed while a few were whispering things to each other that Darkpaw could not hear. Tears slowly tried to stand up but his damaged shoulders made it impossible without severe pain shooting down his entire spine. Crys just lay where he was on his back whimpering quietly.

Lynn walked back out into the ring. "Crys and Tears have been defeated. Darkpaw is victorious," Lynn announced though it was a little unnecessary. Anyone could tell that the young toms had no more will to fight with their injuries.

Luca and Crash came and collected their sons. Darkpaw watched as both tabby faces contorted with the pain of their bodies being moved but they made no more sound. This was the first time Darkpaw had ever injured cats so young. Almost everyone he had ever faced was older than him significantly. Even Ginger was a little older. Darkpaw couldn't say he felt bad about it. They had been the ones who challenged him first.

"Does anyone still doubt young Darkpaw's abilities?" Lynn asked the audience.

"I do," one tom called out.

"Step forward," Lynn ordered.

An orange tom with dark red paws stepped out of the crowd and walked confidently towards Lynn. "I do not believe this tom is so great. He easily could have heard those clumsy apprentices," he announced. A hushed murmur arose from the cats and the tom twitched his whiskers in amusement. His claws darted out of their sheaths and scratched the ground lightly before retreating.

"And what would it take to prove to you that I am, in fact, more than I appear?" Darkpaw challenged. The coloring of this tom's paws made him think that they looked as if they had just been dipped in blood, but it didn't waiver his confidence.

The tom grinned. "I would like to see you fight Magi. I you can defeat her, then I will truly believe you can fight without your eyes."

"Very well, Magi come forward," Lynn called.

The cats separated again and Shadow appeared leading a long-haired white she-cat. Her eyes were the palest of pale blues and her pupils were completely milk-white. She walked with her tail pressed lightly to Shadow's but held a certain confidence like she did not actually need his help. When they reached the other three in the middle, Magi broke off from Shadow and approached Darkpaw until they were nearly nose to nose.

"Magi is another fighter who does not need her eyes to see. She has never been beaten. If you can at least come close to defeating her, I will believe you have this "gift"."

"It is an interesting bargain you make, Kuma. What do you think, Darkpaw? Will you accept a battle from Magi?" Lynn asked.

"That depends. Would she accept a challenge from me?" Darkpaw asked his confidence unwavering still despite what Kuma had said.

Magi smiled. "A confident young tom I see. But is it only a mask? Covering will not work for me, young Darkpaw. I see more than what you want others to see. I can tell more about you than anyone ever has before. Your name fits you, but there is more to it. You strive for something. You desire something more than just to be powerful and that makes you different from all other cats here. I do believe you posses your gift, Darkpaw, and I would be very willing to help you prove its existence. But, you will need to work for it," she said in almost a whisper as she circled Darkpaw. She pressed her body against his in a similar way Lynn had when he had first come, but it was also different. She was paying attention to him specifically. She was feeling him. His muscles, his weak points, his pulse points, the parts of him where blood was most crucial to flow and the parts of him that would end his life the moment they were abused. But there was also more to it. She wasn't just studying his physical body. With each passing of her tail across his neck and each time she deliberately made him look into her broken eyes, she was piercing every block he had ever put up and exploring his mind.

Panic began to set into Darkpaw as he realized this and he backed away from the small she-cat. As soon as their bodies lost contact, he began to pant. He could hear snickers rising up from the audience and the cats accompanying the ring with him.

"Well, Darkpaw, would you be willing to fight Magi?" Lynn questioned.

Darkpaw looked fiercely at Lynn. "When?" he demanded. If he couldn't stand one thing, it was being embarrassed or humiliated in any way.

"Calm yourself, Darkpaw. You have done your fighting for today. The next time you come, Magi will be your opponent and you may show everyone what you are truly capable of," Lynn said.

"Fine," Darkpaw hissed, "Then are we done here?"

"You are free to go," Lynn said.

The entire group, with the exception of Lynn, made their way back to where they had been previously. Darkpaw sat quietly next to J.T. as the next challenge was called out and two new cats prepared to tear the other to shreds.

"Are you alright?" J.T. asked while trying to hide a smirk from the flustered kit.

"I'm fine," Darkpaw growled. He would be returning soon, very soon. He would show them all what he could do. He would put Magi in her place just as he had done to Tears and Crys. He took long slow breaths, knowing that if he lost focus, he would be just as doomed as the two kits had been. He must not do this for revenge, but to prove himself. It was a fight for honor, not bragging rights, but both wasn't such a bad gain either…

**Ok here's the deal. In one week I have a two week break from school. In that time I will be tearing my brains out getting as many chapters out as I can. But, I can make no promises on number because 1) I'm not the only person in this house that needs to use the computer and 2) I want to do more with my break than stare at a screen writing about cats killing each other. Like always, bear with me and I promise I will deliver to the best of my abilities. Also, coming soon! Dawnpaw and Nightpaw return in: Darkpaw's First Gathering! See the reactions of the clans to the son of Darkstripe living in secret with ShadowClan for so long. How will Mistyfoot react to seeing the copy of one of the cats who killed her brother? What will Firestar say? What will Blackstar say? What will Darkpaw say to make this even **_**more **_**interesting? Find out next time when ****What's in a Name**** returns! (sorry I was feeling theatrical)**


	17. Chapter 16

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Snip- light-tan she-cat with bright yellow eyes. Mother of Thicketpaw and mate to Ruckus. Former BloodClan rouge.**

**Ruckus- black tom with amber eyes and a dark brown stripe going down his back. Father of Thicketpaw and mate to Snip. Former BloodClan rouge.**

**Runningtail- old black and white she-cat. WindClan warrior.**

Darkpaw had just walked back into camp with his catch when Blackstar called for the clan to gather around him. Setting his prey on the pile quickly, Darkpaw trotted over to join the others. Tonight was the gathering and this time, he should probably listen to the announcement.

Russetfur called out the list of warriors going and called the names of each of the apprentices, ending with Darkpaw. Five warriors were remaining behind which successfully got the small group agitated. They all knew what was happening tonight. Even if they hadn't, they would have figured it out as soon as Darkpaw was mentioned.

"Blackstar, don't you think you might want to take the entire clan this time?" Thicketpaw's mother, Snip, protested.

"When has that ever been done before?" Blackstar countered.

"Well, never," Snip admitted.

"And why should it be done now? We aren't the first clan that has come to a gathering with…surprising news," Blackstar said.

"Surprising? You call housing this bastard in secret for five moons surprising?" Snaketail hissed.

Darkpaw was pleased to know that his foster mother would not be attending the gathering. He could only imagine how much worse she would make the situation. Tigerpaw also put the young tabby on edge, but there was nothing he could do about him.

"She does have a point, Blackstar," Jaggedtooth murmured.

"And do you feel the same way, Ruckus? How about you, Boulder?"

Boulder stepped back. He hadn't said a word this entire time. Why was Blackstar mentioning him? "I, uh, well I mean…"

"Do all of you whom I had once assumed to be some of the bravest cats I've met believe that ShadowClan is in so much danger because of a kit? Do you all truly think that my judgment is so clouded that I cannot see what will or will not lead to danger for my clan? The clan _you _agreed to join?" Blackstar hissed to the entire clan but targeting the former rouges openly.

All of them were silent. All of them felt highly uncomfortable in the situation. Snaketail, Snip, Ruckus, Jaggedtooth, and Rowanclaw all had the same reason for wanting to attend the gathering. Of course they didn't think Blackstar would lead them into danger. Of course they didn't think it was a threat to announce Darkpaw to the other clans. It was a gathering! The only cats that would dare attack during a gathering were in the clan delivering the news. No, they just wanted to be a part of it. They wanted to see what would happen. Darkpaw had gone from source of terror to source of entertainment.

Blackstar knew what was happening in the minds of his warriors and it disgusted him. He was also disgusted with himself because he knew the same things would be going thru his mind if he were in their position. But he wasn't. He wasn't a warrior waiting to see the drama unfold at a gathering, he was a leader taking his warriors to a gathering and he would not go back on his choices. "Enough," he ordered, "If Russetfur did not call your name then get out of here. The rest of you…well stay here."

The five abandoned warriors grudgingly went back to the warriors' den. No one noticed Runningnose watching this all from the elders' den with a level of amusement that rarely showed on the old cat's face.

Littlecloud glanced up and saw his former mentor with the smug look on his face. He shot the older tom a dirty look. "Crazy old fool," he growled good-naturedly. Runningnose couldn't have heard him but seemed to know anyway.

Darkpaw's heart was racing as he looked around at his clan, though none of them were looking at him anymore. They were whispering amongst themselves, mainly about him. Mudriver and Thundertail walked over.

"Hey, buddy, congratulations you've finally reached your first gathering. Are you excited?" Mudriver asked.

Darkpaw nodded.

"I think we should tell you that Blackstar asked us to keep you as inconspicuous as possible until he announces you. According to the other clans, you still don't exist," Thundertail admitted.

"I thought so," Darkpaw said. He didn't mind not being allowed to mingle for now. It was doubtful anyone would really want to mingle with him anyway.

"Great, so you just stay behind us and stay quiet like you always do." Mudriver smiled. He would never admit that he doubted his leader's decision to wait to drop the ball about Darkpaw until he took the poor kit to the gathering. It wasn't his choice, but he thought it could have made the whole thing easier if they had announced him before taking him. He did understand Blackstar's reasoning, though. What were the other clans supposed to do now that Darkpaw had grown up with ShadowClan? When he was a kit it could have been attempted to find someone else to take him, but now he was virtually property of the unpopular clan.

Their conversation was ended as Blackstar called for them to move out. They all filed out in a fair line with Mudriver and Thundertail on either side of Darkpaw. They were at the end of the line with the majority of the apprentices and their mentors directly in front of them. Windpaw was the only one absent, up front with Blackstar instead.

As they reached the tunnel to lead them safely under the Thunder Path, Darkpaw's heart was racing and his paws were tingling in nervous excitement. His breathing was quick and irregular, but he remained silent as they passed through the claustrophobic cave and out the other side. Even though he had never been there before, Darkpaw could sense they were almost to Fourtrees and his legs were beginning to shake, making walking difficult.

"Calm down," Thundertail whispered to him and touched her nose to his flank.

Darkpaw gulped and nodded. The scents of other cats were tickling his nose. They were defiantly not ShadowClan. There were many of them and, before they had even seen the clearing, Darkpaw knew the other three clans were already there.

Blackstar stopped them momentarily to gaze down into the space before signaling all of ShadowClan to go down. The rest of the clan seemed just as excited as Darkpaw as they raced down into the clearing like they were pouncing on prey. There was something powerful and demanding about the way Blackstar burst thru the bushes with his clan. His tail and head were held high as the clan scattered behind him.

Thundertail and Mudriver led Darkpaw quickly to the back of the clearing where a large bush was located. Darkpaw took his hint and slipped into it. His tabby fur disguised him perfectly as he watched Blackstar jump onto the huge rock in the center to join, what he assumed to be, the other leaders.

"That ginger tom, that's Firestar, ThunderClan's leader. The black and white tom is Tallstar, WindClan's leader. And the spotted she-cat is Leopardstar, RiverClan's leader and probably the most vicious of the bunch," Mudriver whispered to Darkpaw. Suddenly the grey tom seemed to stiffen as a small grey body joined by a black one rushed up to them.

"Hi, Mudriver! Hi, Thundertail!" the grey she-cat said happily. The black one simply nodded, signaling she meant the same as her friend.

"Oh, um, hello Dawnpaw, Nightpaw," Thundertail greeted in a disguised, worried voice. She glanced at her brother quickly.

Darkpaw could guess which was which and assumed they were RiverClan due to the lingering scent of water and mud on their pelts as well as an animal Darkpaw could not identify but guessed to be fish.

"So how's it been?" Dawnpaw asked.

"Fine, fine. Normal, I guess," Mudriver answered. He was clearly as stressed as his sister. They both froze as Nightpaw began scenting the air.

"Do you smell something?" the black she-cat asked.

"What's it smell like, Nightpaw?" Dawnpaw asked.

"Well…ShadowClan," Nightpaw admitted.

"Well duh, there's two ShadowClan cat's right here!" Dawnpaw laughed.

"I know but-" Nightpaw was cut off as the gathering began.

Darkpaw watched as Firestar approached the front first. He hardly heard him speak due to the blood rushing thru his ears. Leopardstar went the same way, but then a name caught him.

"Blackstar, why don't you go next," Firestar said calmly. The ginger tom had at once been a kitty-pet, but Darkpaw could tell that the forest life and leadership had hardened him as showed in his strong voice.

"Oh no, why don't you let Tallstar go," Blackstar declined quickly.

"It's fine, Blackstar, go ahead," Tallstar insisted.

"Tallstar, go before me," Blackstar said steadily holding the black and white leader's gaze.

"Alright fine then," Tallstar said. All of the leaders were giving Blackstar strange looks.

Tallstar seemed to finish all too quickly for Blackstar's liking as he finally was forced to take his turn. He looked down at his clan and the others. ShadowClan were looking around unsurely, as if looking for their hidden burden or waiting for the other clans to shout it out suddenly. Blackstar took a deep breath.

"There is something I must tell all of you," he began, "For five moons there has been an extra member of ShadowClan that none of you have known about." He paused as murmurs broke out amongst the cats.

"Go on, Blackstar," Firestar urged fully interested.

"He was brought to us as a kit and is our apprentice. Well, Mudriver's apprentice to be exact." Blackstar nodded and Mudriver and Thundertail stepped aside, allowing Darkpaw out of his hiding place.

Gasps rose up from the other cats as though a monster had stepped out of those bushes and not a simple kit.

"His name is Darkpaw. He was brought to us a moon old by his mother from BloodClan."

"You mean you just accepted a BloodClan kit?!" Leopardstar spat.

"Don't act like you did any different! What was I supposed to do, Leopardstar? They would have killed him if I didn't!" Blackstar defended.

"Oh yeah? Why?"

"Because he's Darkstripe's kit," a young voice called from the crowd.

Blackstar growled and looked down to see a smug look on Tigerpaw's face.

"Haven't you all figured it out just by looking at him? His father was Darkstripe and his mother brought him here from BloodClan because she knew they would hate him just as much as we do. That's why we've been keeping him secret all this time, but now the secret's out," Tigerpaw continued.

"Blackstar, is this true?" Firestar asked.

"Yes," Blackstar nodded.

"And you wanna know what else? He was made an apprentice at-"

"Enough!" Blackstar shouted.

"When?" Leopardstar urged.

"Four moons because he attacked his foster mother and made her bleed even," Tigerpaw finished.

Even more murmurs were coming from the clans now. Nightpaw and Dawnpaw had backed away. Dawnpaw stood beside a tom with spotted legs and Nightpaw was next to them with a blue-grey she-cat. The grey was staring at Darkpaw wide-eyed, focused intently on his pelt.

"Mistyfoot, her brother was killed by Blackstar and your fa-Darkstripe," Mudriver whispered.

"Oh that's just perfect," Darkpaw muttered sarcastically under his breath.

"Blackstar, what were you thinking?" Tallstar, who had been silent up until this point, finally spoke out.

"I was thinking he could not stay with who he was with," Blackstar replied calmly.

"And that was your great solution?!" Leopardstar hissed.

"Yes," Blackstar answered.

"Hey, Blackstar, why didn't you tell them his full name?" Thicketpaw, who was following Tigerpaw as usual, called up.

"His full name?" Firestar asked.

"Darkstripepaw. Not just Darkpaw like Blackstar told you. Even he knows who that thing really is," Tigerpaw sneered.

"Tigerpaw, that's enough! Gingerstripe, control your son, now!" Blackstar ordered.

"He's speaking the truth!" Thicketpaw shouted but a murderous look from her leader zapped her courage and she looked away.

"I am!" Tigerpaw insisted, pulling away from his father's attempts to restrain him.

"Shut your fucking mouth, Tigerpaw! This has nothing to do with you!" Darkpaw yelled.

"It shouldn't have to do with you either! You shouldn't even be here," Tigerpaw retorted.

"Well I am so what are you gonna do about it?" Darkpaw challenged.

"Stop it now!" Gingerstripe, Mudriver, Firestar, and Blackstar all shouted in unison and the clearing became deathly silent.

Tigerpaw and Darkpaw looked up at their mentors is surprise. It was clear that neither of them were used to being shouted at in such a way. Tigerpaw recovered quickly but Darkpaw was still in shock by the harsh look on his mentor's face.

"Blackstar, he doesn't belong with us," Tallstar said calmly.

Blackstar turned on the older tom. "And what of the two Leopardstar took in?! You weren't so prejudice then!" Blackstar hissed.

"He's right." Everyone looked at Firestar. "This kit isn't guilty of any crimes just because of his lineage and the color of his pelt. He has no control over what he is or what his parents were just like Hawkpaw and Mothpaw don't."

"I still wouldn't trust him," Mistyfoot whispered, but the stillness in the clearing allowed every cat to hear.

Darkpaw turned his blue gaze on the she-cat and she looked away. Slowly, he approached.

"Get away from her!" Spottedlegs hissed.

Darkpaw glanced at him but otherwise ignored the threatening gaze. He was not in any danger and he was used to threats by now. "Do you trust Tawnypelt?" he asked her.

"What?" Mistyfoot asked.

"My clanmate, Tawnypelt, do you trust her? And for that matter, would you trust her brother whom I am told looks exactly like their father? Their father Tigerstar who was responsible for corrupting my father and ordering the death of your brother. The one who brought BloodClan to this forest and allowed for my existence? Do you trust his kits more than you trust me simply because you do not know me?" Darkpaw leaned in slightly towards the she-cat and whispered, "Or is it just because you can't get the sand out of your eyes long enough to let go of your little grudge towards my scent and my pelt?"

Mistyfoot looked into Darkpaw's eyes in silence. She saw what every other cat that looked into the kit's eyes saw, the pain and suffering caused by a mentor and apprentice who betrayed their home to take control. She saw a kit nearly die from death berries, she saw BloodClan being recruited, she saw Tawnypaw and Bramblepaw being taken to ShadowClan to avoid being killed by dogs that killed her mother, and she saw her brother, bleeding and exhausted, have his life stolen from him because of what they were. None of it was Darkpaw's fault, just like none of it was Tawnypelt's or Brambleclaw's faults, but Darkpaw was cursed. The other look-alike had eyes that were so soft and gentle, they seemed to apologize for everything his father had done and caused. He could be trusted because those eyes alone told the story of how he was not his father and never would be. But Darkpaw's eyes had been so haunted and tormented by his father's deeds being forced on him and being told that he was the monster he looked like, and his paws had already been bathed in so much blood whether in his dreams or in reality, all you could see was the monster inside of him. The monster blocked out his apology, it blocked out his pain and suffering and mostly, it blocked out that he was an innocent kit who had been hurt unfairly. He was so ruined that who he could have been no longer existed in those cold, blue eyes.

"Yes, I do trust Tawnypelt, and I trust Brambleclaw, but I don't trust you because I can't," Mistyfoot said finally.

"Not that any of us have a reason to anyway. Your own clan doesn't even trust you," a female voice called out. Everyone turned and saw an old black and white she-cat from WindClan.

"And who are you?" Darkpaw asked.

"I'm Runningtail, rouge," she spat, "And I don't think any cat here should trust you at all. I don't care if you weren't responsible for the tragedy that happened here. It sounds to me like you've already done your share of rotten things. Attacking your foster mother in cold blood?"

"And he's the one who scarred my face, not rats!" Tigerpaw hissed.

"What is wrong with you?" Runningtail said.

"It wasn't in cold blood. Neither of those attacks were. They were justified," Darkpaw insisted.

"He was defending himself," Mudriver added.

Disbelief was clear on the faces of all the clans.

"Russetfur, take the clan home. That includes Darkpaw," Blackstar ordered.

"What are you doing?" Firestar asked.

"Send your warriors away. We need to discuss this in private and they aren't helping," Blackstar explained. "Littlecloud, you stay," he added.

"Fine," Firestar said, "Greystripe, take ThunderClan home."

"Go on, Mistyfoot."

Tallstar nodded to Mudclaw and the warriors cleared out of the area. The medicine cats took Littlecloud's lead and remained where they were.

Mudriver and Thundertail were on either side of Darkpaw again, leading him in silence. Windpaw slowed up and walked next to them. They continued in silence back to camp. Tigerpaw glanced back but a warning growl from his mentor made him look forward again.

Once they reached the camp, Russetfur ordered the warriors to the den and apprentices to their den. She would stand guard for the night.

Windpaw stayed next to Darkpaw as they walked back to the apprentices' den. Darkpaw didn't say a word or even look at her even though he knew she would speak.

"Darkpaw…I'm sorry," she said finally.

"For what? Compared to everyone else you seemed pretty tame tonight," he responded flatly.

"I know how hard it must be."

"Do you?" Darkpaw finally looked at her.

"Yeah, I see how everyone treats you."

"Have you been treated the same way? Have you been stuck on the outside of your own clan just because of something you could not control? When was the last time someone didn't have something good to say about the beautiful and wonderful Windpaw?" Darkpaw questioned harshly. When Windpaw didn't answer immediately he added, "Well?"

"Never," she admitted, "but-"

"But nothing. You have no fucking idea what it's like to be me. You never have and you never will. Thank StarClan you have your looks and your heritage because this, this isn't something you even want to understand," Darkpaw hissed.

"Darkpaw, I'm trying to comfort-"

"Comfort me?" Darkpaw cut her off again, "Here's what you need to do, princess." Darkpaw slashed out his claws straight at Windpaw.

Windpaw shut her eyes in fear for what the claws would do. Even though they were moving with blinding speed, she could picture them clearly in her head like they were moving in slow motion. She waited to scream in pain as the claws ripped her open.

Darkpaw's claws stopped a millimeter away from her milky fur. "Stay away from me, Windpaw," Darkpaw whispered in her ear before walking to his nest and curling up.

Windpaw stared in shock at the small tabby. He had never actually threatened her like that before. She didn't want to admit it to herself, but he scared her. She turned and fled into the den. Tigerpaw was just inside the entrance waiting for her. He allowed her to bury her face in his coarse fur while he gently licked her head.

"Now will you trust me? Now do you believe he really is just a monster? Just trash," Tigerpaw whispered to his trembling sister.

_

"Well?!"

"Well what?" Mudriver hissed at the she-cat that had been pressing him for information for nearly an hour now.

"You know what, you bastard!" Snaketail growled.

"I'm not going to tell you what happened, just ask someone else you crazy old hag," Mudriver grumbled and rolled over in his nest.

Snaketail stepped over him so she was once again in his face. "I want a non-bias point of view," she explained.

"And what makes you think I'm not bias?" Mudriver demanded giving up on sleep until Snaketail was chased off. "He's my apprentice. If you truly don't want a bias answer, you should go to Blackstar."

"Where is Blackstar?" Snaketail asked.

Mudriver shot up. "He's not back yet? I thought he would be…"

"What? What is it?" Snaketail asked.

_

Blackstar stood alone under the tree next to the two-leg dump. His argument with the other leaders and their medicine cats had just ended but he did not yet feel like dragging himself back to camp to be bombarded with questions. He was waiting until everyone fell asleep. His warriors needed their sleep after all and he would probably be less irritable for questioning tomorrow if any of the cats didn't already have the story.

Littlecloud had slipped back into the camp past Russetfur, who already figured what Blackstar was doing, and was unseen by anyone else due to how late it was by this point.

Blackstar sighed as he recounted the "discussion".

_

"You honestly just expect us to over-look the fact that you hid something like _this _for five moons and just _now _decided to bring it up by flashing it at a gathering?!" Leopardstar hissed.

"No, and Darkpaw isn't an "it". Besides, he's not the first rouge or son of a traitor who has been kept in a clan," Blackstar replied with a hard look at each of the leaders. They were now sitting in a ring below the Great Rock.

"But he _is_ the first one kept secret. Blackstar even you should have realized that that was not a wise decision," Cinderpelt said quietly.

Blackstar knew Cinderpelt was right and he knew that she meant nothing negative by what she said. She was probably the calmest of all the cats pointing out his "mistake". But despite all this knowledge, Blackstar's irritability was getting the best of him and he turned on the innocent she-cat.

"And what do you mean by "even you should have known", huh? What are you saying? Just because I'm a former rouge you think I don't know the rules of this forest? Is that it?!" Blackstar shouted.

"No, I was simply stating that-"

"Oh you were just stating, I see," Blackstar cut her off sarcastically.

"Blackstar, now is not the time to go off on a tangent towards a medicine cat just because of a choice of words," Littlecloud snapped.

Blackstar calmed himself. "You're right. Look, I realize my decision may have been a little poor, but I did have my reasons," Blackstar continued in a calmer tone.

"You do, do you? Well let's hear them," Tallstar said.

"Yes, let's. I'm dying to hear what you came up with, Blackstar," Leopardstar added.

"Darkpaw came to us so soon after the battle with BloodClan that I did not think any of you would take it very well. To tell the truth, I pictured it to be worse than what's happening now. I decided that the only way to ensure his safe stay with ShadowClan was to incorporate him into the clan long enough so that his rouge status could be cleared up a bit. Granted, that still hasn't worked much, but as far as I am concerned he is just as much ShadowClan as any of my other warriors," Blackstar explained.

"Yeah and we all know how many of your warriors started off as rouges anyway," Leopardstar muttered under her breath but a growl from Blackstar informed her she had been heard. She didn't seem to mind, she was speaking the truth.

"Be that as it may," Blackstar continued through gritted teeth, "I will not have him be treated differently, if I can help it, by cats who should know better. Unless, of course, we wish to continue Tigerstar's genocide." He shot a daring look at the ring of cats.

"Blackstar's right," Firestar said finally, "A warrior is a warrior and an apprentice is an apprentice no matter where they came from. Darkpaw's past does not matter anymore. He seems to be an active member of his clan and a promising apprentice."

"He attacked two of his clanmates!" Leopardstar protested.

"Due to provocation," Littlecloud said sternly. "Snaketail began abusing that kit the moment we left him alone with her because of who his parents were and Tigerpaw has targeted him ever since he left the nursery for the same reason. He has never harmed anyone who did not first harm him to the point his defense mechanism was forced to kick in, otherwise we would all be scarred for the way we treat him. Sure Darkpaw has his quirks, but I do not believe any of them are his fault or intention. I have received no sign from StarClan that Darkpaw is a mistake to have in the clan and we all seem better off with him. He is the best hunter I have ever seen and Blackstar tells me he is just as good at fighting. His mentor, despite his youth, teaches him well and has never talked down about him. And the only reason Mudriver did become his mentor was because everyone else was too stupid and prejudice to mentor the poor kit. It's no wonder he acts hostile and doesn't trust anyone, everyone treats him like dirt!" Littlecloud was panting by the end of his tangent and everyone was looking at him with a shocked face. He turned to his leader. "Blackstar, am I wrong?" he asked.

Blackstar shook his head. "No, you are absolutely right. Mudriver and Thundertail have treated him like any other kit for as long as they have known him and around them he acts like any other kit. I highly doubt that this is a special case."

"I agree with Firestar. Perhaps we should give young Darkpaw a chance. I normally wouldn't trust ShadowClan and I do have my reasons for that, but I trust Blackstar and Littlecloud in this," Tallstar said.

"But I still think Darkpaw needs to be closely monitored. If he has been treated as badly as you two say for as long as you two say, there might be irreparable damage to his mind. Darkpaw may be a good cat, but I don't know if he will ever be able to prove it," Barkface added.

"That's true. Runningnose told me the same thing after he attacked Snaketail and later when he was taking care of Runningnose for a day as punishment. He's always said there was something wrong with that kit and after we realized the full extent of what Snaketail did to him, we knew what it was," Littlecloud agreed.

"I still don't trust him, and I don't trust you, Blackstar," Leopardstar hissed, "I think that bastard's going to be nothing but trouble. I thought we had this problem taken care of after Tawnypelt and Brambleclaw proved themselves, but you mean to tell me we are just expected to trust this already hostile kit? I won't do it. I am not going to put my clan thru another false hope. I'll be watching your little pet, and if he so much as puts a paw out of place, I'll have him shredded."

"If you so much as threaten another one of my apprentices again, I'll have _you _shredded," Blackstar growled.

"Now is not the time to be making _any_ threats," Mudfur said stepping between the two leaders.

"Yes, and honestly, Leopardstar, how much of a problem do you think a single apprentice can be?" Barkface added.

"A single apprentice, none, but a single warrior was all it took," Leopardstar responded.

There was silence for a while before Blackstar finally said, "Darkpaw will not be Tigerstar or Darkstripe unless we make him Tigerstar or Darkstripe. If we tell him what he is, that's what he will be. If we tell him he is a rouge, he will be a rouge. If we tell him he is a killer, he will be a killer. But if we tell him he is a warrior, there is no doubt in my mind that he will be the best damn warrior this forest has seen in a long time."

"I think it is time we returned to our territories now. Our clans will be wondering about us and it is getting late," Firestar said.

No one had much else to say so they simply agreed and went their separate ways. But the tension was not gone. I was still there, nagging in the minds of every medicine cat and leader as they left. All this trouble over a single small apprentice. So much trouble over such a little thing. Such a thing couldn't possibly be so dangerous…could it?

_

That was the thought that was now plaguing Blackstar as he sat beneath his lonely tree. Sure Darkpaw was aggressive and all, but he wasn't really a threat to someone. Well, not someone who hadn't first wronged him anyway. He was just a kit who was confused. Just a little kit that was misunderstood. There was nothing dangerous about him.

Deciding that now was not the time to plague his tired mind with what Darkpaw could and couldn't do, he made his way back to camp. As he walked thru the grass, he passed a bush of death berries. Their glinting red surfaces followed him like eyes in the shadowy moonlight as though they were alive. As though they wanted him to be their prey. As though they knew they could kill him and wanted to do so but were tied back by their wicked stems.

Blackstar passed by the threat carelessly. He did not notice the malice in the berries that watched them. He did not notice many things in his walk but it did not make him less wise, simply more trusting that his way was safe because he knew it so well. But it was ever changing as the seasons dragged on and the berries crouched and waited to be discovered by some other unlucky soul.

_

It was sun high when Darkpaw woke up the next morning. He yawned and stretched before padding over to the fresh kill pile, assuming hunting would be his first job today.

"Hey, Darkpaw, there you are. Get over here," a voice called.

Darkpaw turned in confusion to see that the voice belonged to Russetfur. Knowing better than to argue with the deputy, Darkpaw made his way over, though more than a little confused. "What is it?" he asked.

"You're on the sun high hunting patrol, that's what, now get going," Russetfur ordered and gave the tabby a light nudge towards the rest of the patrol.

Darkpaw blinked several times at the small group of cats before turning back to Russetfur. "Say that again," he asked.

"You. Patrol. NOW!" Russetfur snapped shortly.

Darkpaw nodded. "Yeah that's what I thought you said." He turned back to his apparent patrol. He had never been on an actual patrol before, again because of the need to keep him secret. But now that the secret was out, it made sense he start taking on full responsibilities. He just hadn't expected it to take effect so soon.

The patrol consisted of him, Mudriver, Speckledpaw, Darkflower, and Tawnypelt. Tawnypelt, Mudriver, and Darkflower he could handle. Tawnypelt had never really seemed as bitter towards him as the others and Darkflower could have cared less sometimes and Mudriver was obvious. It was Speckledpaw he was worried about. Well, not worried, but the possibility for a problem was put into bloom by the young calico. Speckledpaw gave Darkpaw a surprisingly gentle half-smile that was so quick Darkpaw was sure it was a trick of the light.

"Come on, let's go," Tawnypelt said giving Darkpaw no more time to think about it.

The patrol raced into the trees and grass with expert silence. At least, most of them did. Speckledpaw was unfortunate enough to be the one apprentice whose silence was somehow disabled. He tried as hard as he could, but somehow every little branch that could snap at his weight found its way under his paws.

Darkpaw held back a smirk at his enemy, keeping it mental instead. He was moving perfectly and the few twigs that he did find were either too strong to be broken by him, or were under him for too short a time to break.

Tawnypelt finally stopped the patrol. She didn't say anything about it, but they all knew why. Speckledpaw looked down at his paws, thoroughly embarrassed.

"Start scenting for prey," Tawnypelt said trying to end the young tom's mental beating as quickly as possible.

The cats broke apart and began scenting. Darkpaw saw Speckledpaw mouth a silent 'I'm sorry' to his mentor before scouting off.

Darkpaw held back on using his gift. With a patrol there was even more likelihood of catching prey and if he caught everything that moved, it could be wasteful and the shortage of prey told him to be even more cautious of that. He caught the sound of a squirrel in the bushes and set out stalking it. There was a rustle here and there as the little creature scurried about. Finally, he pounced.

"OUCH!" he yelped as fiery pain shot through his head as his skull collided with another. He opened his eyes to see Speckledpaw also rubbing his head. Darkpaw lept to his feet and growled.

"Sorry, my fault."

Darkpaw was caught off guard completely. "W-what did you say to me?" he asked.

"Sorry. I wasn't watching where I was going and I didn't realize you were also going after that squirrel. My bad," Speckledpaw apologized.

Darkpaw stared, dumbstruck. "Um, it's ok. I wasn't looking either," he managed to stutter out.

"Yeah, well, you probably saw it before I did anyway," Speckledpaw shrugged, "I'm just not very good at this I guess."

"I thought you were a good hunter. You always bring back plenty of prey," Darkpaw said.

"Yeah well, that's only half me. Tigerpaw does a lot of it too sometimes, something about it looking bad for him of his best friend can't catch a mouse or something like that," the calico explained.

"Really?"

"Well duh! Didn't you hear me running? I'm like a freaking dog!" Speckledpaw laughed, "The only thing I'm good for is fighting."

"You are strong," Darkpaw admitted more to himself than to Speckledpaw.

Speckledpaw heard him, but didn't mention it.

"Wait, are you actually getting along with me? What the hell are you doing?" Darkpaw demanded looking around for signs of the other apprentices.

"Relax, they aren't here. I'm not planning anything. What, we can't have a civilized conversation?"

"Um…no," Darkpaw said.

Speckledpaw laughed again. It was almost at the same note as Darkpaw's, but more carefree. It was nice to hear. The kind of laugh that made you want to join it, but Darkpaw held back. "Well would you prefer I attack you or something? I could, I guess, if that's what you really want," Speckledpaw offered.

"That won't be necessary. It's just, well, you're supposed to hate me, aren't you?"

"Darkpaw, I don't hate you. I don't hate anybody. I never have, it's just not me. That's not to say I like you, but hell, it would be a bit ridiculous of me to hate you. It's Tigerpaw that hates you and he's my best friend, you can't expect me to go against him for you. I could try talking to him if you really can't handle it."

"No it's fine, leave it. We haven't had any big problems recently anyway."

"Oh so you're just going to overlook the gathering fiasco?" Speckledpaw asked.

"I expected worse," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"You wouldn't appreciate it even if I did try to help you, would you?"

"Nope."

"That's what I thought. So, once we get back into camp, we go back to "hating" each other, agreed? For the sake of both our reputations."

"Agreed," Darkpaw said with a smirk. They both knew that Speckledpaw had no reputation besides Tigerpaw's crony and the worst apprentice at this time. Darkpaw, however, was the sworn enemy of the trio and would not be seen dead having a simple talk with one of them. That would only bring trouble for both of them.

"Great, now get out of here, rouge, before I rip you apart," Speckledpaw growled.

"Make me, freak," Darkpaw retorted.

Speckledpaw gave in and left with a huff and Darkpaw returned to hunting. Speckledpaw was kind, but foolish. Darkpaw had no need nor want for the calico, and he seemed to get that. Unfortunately for Windpaw, she had gotten that a little too late.

_

Windpaw half-heartedly practiced her combat moves with Blackstar. The white tom could tell something was bothering his apprentice in every aspect of how she was acting.

"Windpaw, you're putting too much weight on your right side," Blackstar said.

"Mm," was all Windpaw said in return her eyes looking down.

"Windpaw, I want you to climb up that tree and then attack me from above," Blackstar ordered.

"Mm," Windpaw said again but did not leave the robotic movements of the style she had been doing all day.

"Windpaw, I'm pushing back your warrior ceremony for another three moons."

"Mm."

"Windpaw, I'm sending you to live in the two-leg dump."

"Mm."

"Windpaw, Darkpaw wanted me to tell you he loves you."

"What?!" Windpaw's head snapped up in confusion and she was immediately slammed to the ground by her mentor.

Blackstar stood over the small she-cat. "Ok, now tell me what's bothering you," Blackstar ordered.

"Nothing, Blackstar," Windpaw mumbled and began to get back up but was pushed back down by her leader.

"Tell me," he said again looking deep into the apprentice's light eyes.

Windpaw's resolve broke down in that stare. "I've done nothing but try to help Darkpaw and be nice to him but all he does is push me away. What the hell is wrong with him?! His he retarded or something? I mean honestly what kind of cat that's been thru the shit he's been thru can't take a little kindness? He's fine with Thundertail and Mudriver all that time!"

"Uh-huh, and you're jealous?"

"No!" Windpaw insisted.

"Liar. You don't like the fact that there is actually someone who does not want you, is that it?" Blackstar inquired.

"No, that's not it!"

"Then what is it?"

"…"

"That's what I thought. Look, Darkpaw is different from every cat you know. He doesn't want to just take affection from everyone, he doesn't know how. You are off limits to him no matter how much you try to say you aren't. In the eyes of most of the cats in this clan, he is lower than you and he is just barely scraping the level of Thundertail and Mudriver. You know as well as I do that those two have put themselves on the outskirts of the clan, especially Mudriver, since they became apprentices. Now you mean to tell me that Darkpaw will just be able to believe he can raise himself up to the level of the most popular cat in the clan just because she says so? How do you think social order works here, Windpaw? That's like saying a rouge and a cat from StarClan are equal. Everyone knows they aren't and even if one of them said they were, it wouldn't be true."

"But that's not fair!" Windpaw protested.

"No one said it was fair, it's life. You were born to a clan that is looked down upon by everyone while you are one of the nicest cats I have ever seen, but everyone will always see what you are before who. Does that seem fair?" Blackstar pressed.

"Well…no," Windpaw admitted.

"Then if things can be unfair for you, why should they suddenly be fair for Darkpaw? Wouldn't that be unfair?"

"Ok, Blackstar, I see your point, but I still don't like it," Windpaw mumbled.

"Neither do I, but that's the way it is and things won't change just because you want them to. If Darkpaw is to become your friend, it has to be on his terms, understand?"

"Yes, Blackstar."

"Good, now let's get some real training in."

Windpaw rushed back into her combat with her usual spark back. Blackstar was right, her bias terms would only put Darkpaw at risk. Darkpaw would know what was best for him and when since he had always needed to know that. After all, who knew one better than oneself?

_

Darkpaw re-entered the camp with the rest of the patrol silently. He dropped his prey on the pile and walked off to meet Mudriver after shooting a quick glare at Speckledpaw. The two toms had had no other interactions besides the one, but Darkpaw still hadn't trusted Speckledpaw not to try something.

Speckledpaw, on the other hand, hadn't even thought about Darkpaw after the conversation. He had no intentions of saying anything about it to Tigerpaw even when the tabby approached him and demanded information.

"Information about what?" Speckledpaw asked walking past his best friend on his way to Runningnose.

"You were on patrol with the rouge, what happened?" Tigerpaw demanded again.

"We hunted, that's what happened," Speckledpaw said shortly.

"Well did he do anything?" Tigerpaw pressed.

"Why yes he did actually, he hunted too," Speckledpaw said.

"Speckledpaw you know what I mean. Did he try anything funny?"

"I never pictured him as the type with a big sense of humor."

"Is that a 'no' then?"

"No, Tigerpaw, I was going after a mouse and jumped out and attacked me in front of everyone and then tried to rip my ears from my skull. Of course he didn't do anything, what the hell do you expect him to do?" Speckledpaw snapped.

"Jeez, pissy much?" Tigerpaw laughed.

"Yes that's exactly it," Speckledpaw said rolling his eyes, "Come on why do you think he's going to try something? Aren't _you_ the one who was targeting _him _last night?"

"I just wanted the whole truth to be out," Tigerpaw said defensively.

"Ok, Tigerpaw. Well he obviously didn't do anything so just drop it," Speckledpaw said.

Tigerpaw was about to say more, but they had already reached the elders' den. He growled and stalked off. He noticed Darkpaw but ignored the tabby once again. Gingerstripe still hadn't forgiven him for his outburst last night and it wouldn't look good on his part if he picked up again where they had left off.

_

"So, Mudriver, are we going to be doing any training today?" Darkpaw asked as he followed his mentor thru the woods.

"Is that all you can ever think about?" Mudriver asked.

"No, sometimes I think about why I can't fly, but then I get over it because I need to train," Darkpaw said.

"You're a workaholic," Mudriver grumbled.

"So what? I'm the best," Darkpaw countered.

"What makes you say that? You are behind all the other apprentices training-wise."

"But not skill-wise, so doesn't that make up for it?" Darkpaw asked. What the hell more was there to learn?

"In some things, yes, but there are things you don't know yet," Mudriver said, "You've only been training for a little while, you have to give it time."

"How much time?" Darkpaw demanded.

"Let's see, Tigerpaw and Windpaw have been training for six moons and they still aren't warriors. What do you expect?"

Darkpaw cringed. At least four more moons?! That was insane! He couldn't wait that long!

"And there's the possibility that you might be held back some because of your age."

"No way!" Darkpaw cried in dismay. He wanted to be the best warrior _now_! Not have to wait even longer.

"Or you could just be a young warrior, either is possible with you. But the point is you have to wait. You don't even know a single law of the warrior code, do you?" Mudriver said. They had been over it, but Darkpaw hadn't seemed to pay attention.

"Do not hunt or trespass on another clan's territory. Elders and kits must be fed before apprentices and warriors and, unless they have permission, apprentices may not eat until they have hunted to feed the elders. Prey is killed only to be eaten and give thanks to StarClan for its life. A kit must be at least six moons old to become an apprentice. The deputy will become clan leader when the leader dies or retires. No warrior may neglect a kit in pain or in danger, even if that kit is from a different clan. The word of the clan leader is the warrior code. A warrior rejects the soft life of a kittypet," Darkpaw recited quickly.

Mudriver counted mentally in his head and had to recite the code in his head before he could speak again. "Eight out of fifteen, damn that's better than I did when I had equal amount of training. How did you remember all that?"

"You say the first three all the time, the next one, well, I've heard it before plenty of times, and the next four I guess just stuck in my head," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"Interesting," Mudriver said, "But do I really say it that much?"

"Yes because you kept having to remind me when I first started training to hunt," Darkpaw admitted.

"You have a very good memory."

"I know, now are we going to train or not?" the tabby asked impatiently.

"It's getting late and you're going to start freezing your ass off soon, but if you want to do something, fine we'll do something. Sit down," Mudriver ordered.

'_Oh no,' _Darkpaw thought, _'He's not going to…please tell me he's not going to…'_

"Repeat after me," Mudriver instructed.

"NOOOOO!!!" Darkpaw cried, "This isn't what I meant at all!"

"Do you want to be a warrior?" Mudriver demanded.

"Yes," Darkpaw hissed.

"Then you have to learn the code, now do as I say and repeat after me," Mudriver growled. "Defend your clan, even with your life. You may have friends in other clans, but your loyalty must remain to your clan, as one day you might meet them in battle."

"Defend your clan, even with your life…" Darkpaw mumbled thru gritted teeth.

They continued this until it became so cold that Darkpaw was shivering too much to say a word straight. Mudriver walked over and allowed the tabby to press into the thick fur of his mentor as they walked back to camp.

Darkpaw reluctantly pulled away from the warm body and raced to his nest, curling up as tightly as he could.

"Are you sure he'll be ok?" Thundertail asked her brother as she saw Darkpaw.

"Yeah, his winter coat will come in soon and he won't have to worry about the cold anymore. Too bad he sleeps outside though," Mudriver said as he went with his sister into the warriors' den.

"He'll make his way in there if he wants to. He knows he can," Thundertail said.

"He's a stubborn son-of-a-bitch alright, but he'll be fine. He knows what he needs." Mudriver collapsed into his nest that was as messy as his fur was and said pelt spread around him so he looked like a fluffy blanket.

Thundertail pressed herself against her brother. Her own short coat still hadn't adjusted to the cold just like Darkpaw and she was thankful for once that her brother had long fur she could bury herself inside. Other warriors were also curling up close to each other and soon the heat inside the den was perfect.

Darkpaw continued to shiver inside his still-freezing nest. He thought several times about just going into the apprentices' den, but he refused to let his body move. He would show them that he could take it, no matter what it was.

He nearly jumped out of his fur as something hit his pelt. He looked up and another something hit his nose. It was water! Water falling from the sky! It began falling harder and faster and it chilled the young tabby to the bone. He had thought he had smelled something strange today. This must have been the rain Runningnose was talking about, and it was freezing! Snow was supposed to be colder than this?!

_

The next morning, Mudriver found Darkpaw fast asleep just inside the entrance to the apprentices' den. Darkpaw fur was matted a little in some places where water had obviously clung to his coat stubbornly until it solidified to become the spiky little kit now laying before him. Darkpaw must have spent a while outside before finally deciding that maybe the whole thing wasn't worth it. Mudriver smiled.

"Poor, stubborn, son-of-a-bitch. You just won't quit will you?" he said before nudging the tabby awake before the other apprentices awoke and found him here…

**WooHoo! First chapter out and 8000 words! I'm not promising more chapters at this length, but it would be cool wouldn't it? I'm still going to try to keep my 5000 word average though. As usual, reviews make Darkpaw happy!**


	18. Chapter 17

"Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey gather here for a clan meeting," Blackstar announced.

Darkpaw looked up from where he was sitting with Mudriver and Thundertail and the three made their way over to the boulder Blackstar was currently occupying.

Windpaw and Tigerpaw were sitting in the front with Gingerstripe and Thistlefeather looking very excited. Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw were a little to the side with their mentors looking pleased as well. Even from where Darkpaw sat in the back with the fading light he could tell that both Windpaw and Tigerpaw were excellently groomed.

Blackstar continued once the clan had gathered. "I call upon the warrior ancestors to look down upon these two apprentices. Tigerpaw and Windpaw please step forward."

They didn't need to be asked twice and looked about ready to spring up and join Blackstar where he sat.

"These apprentices have been training long and hard to learn the ways of the ShadowClan warrior and it is time they received their warrior names. Windpaw, from this day forth you will be known as Windlegs. Tigerpaw, from this day forth you will be known as Tigerstripe. As is the tradition, you two will sit a silent vigil and guard the camp alone tonight. Speckledpaw, Thicketpaw your warrior ceremonies are fast approaching as well, I trust that you will be just as magnificent additions to the rank."

As Blackstar finished, Darkpaw noticed that Blackstar's eyes darted quickly to look at him. Darkpaw knew his ceremony was far off, but he knew it would come and he intended to be the most magnificent of his group.

Tigerstripe and Windlegs glanced at each other with huge grins. Gingerstripe and Thistlefeather smiled proudly at their kits and each other. Darkpaw knew neither of his parents would ever look at him that way, but he liked to think that his mother had at least once before she gave him up.

The two new warriors went to begin their vigil and the rest of the camp receded. Blackstar jumped down and approached the remaining tabby apprentice.

"Are you impatient, Darkpaw?" the leader asked.

"To become a warrior? Yes," Darkpaw admitted.

"Your time will come," Blackstar promised. He nodded to Thundertail and Mudriver before going to his den.

"Yeah but first you have a lot to learn," Mudriver said.

"Like what?" Darkpaw asked. He seemed to have everything Mudriver had taught him so far, perfected. Maybe there were a few fighting or hunting techniques he wasn't a hundred percent on, but how long could that take?

"You'll find out soon enough," Mudriver said with a wink.

_

Tigerstripe glanced at his sister and smiled again. There was no doubt that both of them were equally pleased about this. To both of them the road had felt much too long and Tigerstripe had worried for just a second that his ceremony would be pushed back as a result of his past behavior. But here he was, sitting vigil with his sister like they had always dreamt about.

Windlegs sat on the opposite edge of the entrance from her brother but they couldn't contain glances at one another. Somehow, the fact that they were now warriors sucked away any tired feelings they would have had at this point. Tigerstripe and Windlegs felt completely alert and awake and willing to do their first duty for their clan.

It seemed Darkpaw's outburst towards Windlegs after the gathering had brought the siblings closer, or at least back to where they had been before the whole mess with Darkpaw started. Windlegs still refused to speak ill of the young tabby and Tigerstripe knew better than to push his sister.

Not far into their lonely and creepily silent vigil Tigerstripe's thoughts began to wander. He had always expected that his vigil would fill him with excitement and that his mind would be racing with thoughts of all he would accomplish as a warrior, but those weren't the thoughts that filled his head now. A single black tabby plagued his mind. His hatred for that pelt caused his mind to be poisoned with nothing but thoughts of it.

Tigerstripe's claws extended and scraped the ground before he pulled them back quickly in hopes his sister wouldn't notice his behavior. But the thoughts of the damn kit came back to him. He tried to clear his mind of it. He was supposed to be guarding his camp, not thinking about his enemy, but he couldn't stop himself.

Horror began to fill the young warrior as he realized that he was mostly the cause of this. He had stupidly filled his head with nothing but thoughts on how to hurt and attack the other tom that now he could think of nothing else. He couldn't even think clearly enough to accomplish any of his plans. Tigerstripe clawed desperately at the ground and looked to the sky in some hopes that StarClan would end his madness, but the sky was completely dark with clouds. Even the moon was hidden from him. StarClan were not looking down upon him on this night.

Fear soon turned to anger as the minutes dragged by. The time bit and clawed at Tigerstripe's mind, causing his madness to continue. It was going intentionally slow just to plague him. It was slowing itself so his thoughts could consume him further than they would have on a normal night.

'_Damn that bastard. Damn him!' _Tigerstripe thought bitterly. Without the ability to deter his thoughts from the other tabby, Tigerstripe simply took to blame him for his torture.

He looked over at the apprentices' den where he could only see the tip of Darkpaw's tail for a moment before it realized it was being watched and retreated back into its hiding place.

'_Damn you, rouge,' _Tigerstripe growled in his mind.

He turned back to the entrance. The cold dark forest stretched out before him. Promises of secrets and blood from past and future lay before the tom. Shadows crept about, but Tigerstripe felt no fear. The shadows were his brothers, his companions, just like they were to the rest of his clan. His clan controlled the shadows and that made them the biggest and most powerful of the clans. The shadows were their warriors that hid seamlessly amongst the other unsuspecting clans. Shadows held darkness and danger, and shadows held ShadowClan. Tigerstripe looked to the black sky again and grinned. StarClan _were_ looking upon him. They had bathed the entire world in shadows, given everything in it to ShadowClan to do with it as they saw fit. ShadowClan were outside of the other clans and inside them all at the same time.

But something wasn't right in Tigerstripe's paradise. Something didn't belong. The stench of blood filled Tigerstripe's nose and he knew where it was coming from. Darkpaw. Darkpaw did not belong here. He was not a son of the shadows like Tigerstripe was. StarClan had no place for him. He could try as much as he wanted to, but he did not belong in the shadows. He belonged with his own kind. He belonged with the shedders of blood that held no honor. And to have such a disease tainting his perfect world was too much for Tigerstripe. That poison had marked him and he had never had a chance to mark it back. It was like smoke. No, it truly was like a disease. It was something he could not fight, but that could fight him. He had to eradicate it. Had to get rid of it. For the sake of his clan. It did not belong in his clan!

'_HE is in the clan whether you like it or not and, being part of the clan, he is your clanmate, understand?'_

'_The word of clan leader IS warrior code.'_

Tigerstripe didn't know what to think anymore. He wanted the sun to come up. He wanted this time where he could do nothing but think to end. There were too many things he could not decide on. Too many things he did not understand. He cursed himself for questioning too many things at once without being able to find and answer. He looked over and Windlegs. She seemed unaffected by all that was going on. Could she not feel the sickening pressure bearing down on her during this night? No, no she felt it. She was in just as much turmoil as he was. Perhaps it was about something completely different, perhaps it was from the same thing, but she felt it. She was hiding it from him. She was sitting there, stone-faced, so he could not see her weakness.

Tigerstripe was shocked as a vision of himself flashed before him. He suddenly realized that he was sitting as frozen as his sister. He was completely numb and unmoving in his physical body. He was staring at nothing, he hadn't even blinked. He finally understood the purpose behind this vigil. He was not watching over the camp. No one was going to attack. He was being forced to do nothing but think and reflect upon himself. The magic of the shadows had sucked him in and removed him from his body and forced him back into his mind. He was there, but he wasn't there. The realization of this caused Tigerstripe to feel like he might fall over, but he still didn't move.

He managed to turn his stiff neck lazily to look at where the horizon would be. Dawn was not yet there, but it was gently lapping at the thoughts of a new day. The sun's rays peaked ever so shyly over the edge of the Earth, trying to decide if the world was yet ready for them.

Tigerstripe was ready. He wanted the night to end. He wanted the shadows to separate again.

Then time moved in fast forward. Suddenly the sun was pulling herself up on her invisible rope, shedding light over the forest but depriving the deep crevices of ShadowClan.

The dawn patrol came and relieved the new warriors. Both Tigerstripe and Windlegs snapped back to reality from their trance. They looked at each other and smiled, but the smiles were masks. Both of them wanted to know if the other had experienced the same attack from the shadows and knew they had. With something like that, it was impossible to be alone.

Gingerstripe and Thistlefeather were both on the dawn patrol but quickly led their kits to their own nests since neither Tigerstripe nor Windlegs had had a chance to make a new one yet. Windlegs took her mother's soft nest and Tigerstripe accepted his father's.

Tigerstripe was surprised, yet not at all, to find that his father's nest was almost identical to his own back in the apprentices' den. Not previously aware of experiencing any tiredness, Tigerstripe's body suddenly screamed at him with exhaustion all in one blow. Now that he had returned to his body, he could feel again and his eyes slammed shut as though they were going to stay this way forever. Tigerstripe let it wash over him. He didn't recall falling asleep, but he must have for that was how he was when his parents returned.

_

'Soon enough' ended up being several nights later, much to Darkpaw's dismay. Now that Tigerstripe was out of the apprentices' den, Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw bothered with him much less. As a result, he had moved his nest into the apprentices' den on the far side away from the remaining two cats. With this arrangement, Darkpaw was sleeping much more soundly. So when Mudriver came to wake him up at moon high, it was with much more resistance than would normally accompany such an intrusion.

"Mudriver, what are you doing?" Darkpaw groaned groggily.

"You've got things to learn, Darkpaw, and now's the time to learn them," Mudriver said, "Now hush, you'll wake the others up."

Darkpaw grudgingly got to his paws and followed his mentor out of the den. A few warriors were still awake which wasn't unusual for ShadowClan. They passed the guards with no protest and wound their way into the forest.

"Mudriver, where are we-YIKES!" Darkpaw thought all his fur flew off his body at that moment as something incredibly cold splashed on his face. "What was that?!" he demanded.

"Water, you needed to wake up a bit," Mudriver said.

"Wake up for what?!" Darkpaw was getting tired of this game very quickly.

"You are a ShadowClan apprentice. ShadowClan are known for their ability to hunt and fight in the dark better than any other clan. It's time for you to learn that," Mudriver explained.

"So what are we going to do?" Darkpaw asked.

"First, you need to learn the territory at night," Mudriver said.

"Isn't it the same?"

"Where are we?" the grey tom asked.

Darkpaw looked around. He could see in the dark just as well as any other cat, but there was a distinction. "Um…" He struggled to get his eyes to adjust to the remarkable lack of light in the shadowy forest that made up ShadowClan territory. If he had ever wondered how his clan got its name other than their first leader, this was his answer. A cold breeze blew and Darkpaw shivered slightly. His fur had finally grown thicker and he was thankful for it now that he assumed coming out here at night wouldn't be a foreign thing.

"Well?" Mudriver asked.

"I…I have no idea," Darkpaw admitted finally.

"Exactly. We are under that tree we come to so much. See, night changes things. It can also draw out more prey. Now, stay by me n let's re-enact your first day a training." Mudriver led Darkpaw all over the territory. They stopped on the edge of what Darkpaw quickly identified as the Thunder Path after realizing the stench and feel.

"It's still warm," he said in slight surprise.

"Yeah, it says warm all the time, almost like it's alive," Mudriver confirmed.

Darkpaw backed off the black path. He didn't like the idea of the Thunder Path being alive. He had specifically avoided this place as much as possible when he was on his own.

By the time they had finished the tour of the territory, it had taken longer than it had in the day. They wandered back into camp with Darkpaw nearly dead on his paws. Mudriver guided the small tabby to the den and Darkpaw didn't say a word as he collapsed into the warmth of his nest.

Something was wrong. He pawed around himself and realized there was no nest there. He kept moving his paw and it hit the stump he used to sleep by. In his tiredness, Darkpaw had instinctively laid down where his nest used to be. He groaned and rolled over, not quite willing to get up yet. He suddenly remembered something. He reached down under the stump and retrieved his treasure. It was stone cold. He hadn't yet figured out where to keep it in the den. He scented quickly and discovered that Speckledpaw and Thicketpaw were already out training. He placed the bone in his mouth and made his way inside.

He poked around where his new nest was and finally decided to bury it under his bedding. It was thick enough he could probably hide a whole meal under there. Moving some moss and grass aside he made a small compartment and placed his treasure in there. After covering it he laid down to make sure it didn't affect his sleeping. It didn't and he was soon dozing contently in his nest.

_

Sleeping inside the den now made Darkpaw hyper aware of the fact that he could possibly awaken one of the other apprentices if he left too carelessly. This slight paranoia kept him from returning to the ring to face his match with Magi. Thankfully, Mudriver's training taught him to move even more silently than he already could and waking up each night allowed him to practice his exits. He paid close attention to his den mates each night to see if there was any threat of them awakening during the night to discover him missing. His research turned up that the few times they did wake up during the night, they paid no attention to where he was and his night time training sessions made it even less suspicious if he was gone.

"Nice job," Mudriver praised as Darkpaw managed to catch a mouse in the middle of the night without use of his gift.

"Thanks," Darkpaw said. His eyes worked brilliantly in the dark and he was extra sensitive of his surroundings. He could now walk the entire territory just as easily as if it were day. The time when no moon appeared in the sky was a more difficult time for him, but he had quickly moved thru it. Now the moon was beginning to fill again and Darkpaw wondered a little in the back of his mind if he would be returning once again to the gathering this full moon.

"Ok, now that we have mice down, let's work on voles," Mudriver continued. They were going in the same order as they had when Darkpaw had begun his training. Combat would come after hunting was covered and then both would be worked to be perfected.

Darkpaw's day training had not been forgotten and he had quickly learned to get his body up at any time no matter how much sleep he had gotten. This would come in handy when he finally decided to return to the ring. He imagined that combat at night would not be difficult for him since he had done it before, but the ring was lit and the forest was not. There was very little difference between fighting in the ring at night and fighting in the day. In the forest, that difference was massive.

As their training for that night wound to a close, Darkpaw felt ready to return to his nest. His movements were feeling slightly robotic and he was not fully concentrated on what he was doing. That left room for error and he was lucky Mudriver caught him before he jumped onto a large pile of gorse.

"Ok I think it's time little apprentice's went to sleep," Mudriver said as he placed the tabby on safe ground.

"No, I'm fine Mudriver, really. Just lost focus, that's all," Darkpaw protested holding back a yawn.

"Yeah, n you almost lost an eye, my little fool. Come on, it's time you got back to your nest. N besides," the grey tom let out a long yawn, "I'm tired."

"Fine," Darkpaw mumbled. His body was happy for the rest, but his mind was still working.

"Oh, I almost forgot, no training tomorrow. As soon as you wake up, go find Russetfur, the apprentices are getting evaluated."

"Evaluated?" Darkpaw hadn't been evaluated before. He knew he would need to at some point, but he didn't know that point would be tomorrow.

"Yeah. Speckledpaw n Thicketpaw are gonna get evaluated to see if they're ready to become warriors yet n Blackstar just figured they might as well check up on your progress too," Mudriver explained.

"What will I need to do?" Darkpaw asked.

"T's not hard. You just gotta show your ability to fight by fighting Russetfur, claws sheathed of course," Mudriver glanced back at the tabby, "Then, you go on a hunt n she watches you. You aren't supposed to see her though. She'll check in on all of you secretly, she's good at that."

"Ok," Darkpaw said. That didn't sound so hard. He was confident in his ability to take down the deputy even with sheathed claws and hunting was quickly becoming his specialty.

"Don't be too confident," Mudriver warned, "You might be able to take me on and maybe even hold your own against Thundertail, but Russetfur's older, smarter, and stronger than all of us put together."

"Ok," Darkpaw said again still not convinced the she-cat would pose much of a threat. The wins he had had all his life had spoiled him and he doubted anyone could beat him without one hell of a fight. Just the perfect warm-up to beat Magi.

_

The next morning, Darkpaw woke up earlier than he normally did after his night training, but it had started later too. Mudriver had accidentally overslept a little but that didn't matter now. He was the first apprentice to wake up since Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw had both trained the previous night as well. Deciding to let them wake up on their own, Darkpaw walked out into the bright sunlight.

Russetfur was waiting patiently by the camp entrance awaiting her charges for the day. She didn't react much when Darkpaw approached her and the two waited in silence for a few more minutes before the other two apprentices emerged.

"Let's go," Russetfur said with a jerk of her head and the three apprentices followed her out of the camp. When they reached the burnt stump, Russetfur stopped them. "Ok, who wants to go first?" she asked.

Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw glanced at each other nervously. Darkpaw considered going first, but decided he wanted to get an idea of how Russetfur fought first. Warrior fighting styles differed from ringfighter fighting styles and he had no idea what Russetfur was capable of dishing out. Speckledpaw ended up stepping forward first.

"Ok Speckledpaw, you ready?" Russetfur asked.

Speckledpaw nodded hesitantly. It was clear he did not want to do this, but determination set in as he remembered that the time of his warrior ceremony depended on this. He circled the deputy, knowing better than to make the first move with her. He had fought her before and rushing in had been a horrible mistake that he not only got chastised about by Darkflower, but even Tigerstripe! Tigerpaw at the time.

Russetfur seemed to figure out that the calico would not make the first move and sprang forward. Speckledpaw ducked but she caught his chest anyway, aiming low, knowing what he would do. Speckledpaw grunted as he was knocked over but was quick to regain his paws before any more could happen. He shot out of the way of a swipe, only to be followed and struck anyway. He used the momentum of the hit to roll out of the way before getting up again and crashed into Russetfur's side. But the she-cat was good on her paws and her balance did not waiver. Speckledpaw had figured she wouldn't, but he still did not give up. He was a smart and calculating cat even if he did not often express it. He kept a close watch on every move his opponent made and when he fought, he was the definition of a ShadowClan warrior. Unfortunately, the same was not true for his hunt which was what made it crucial that he impress his mother in this area.

Even though Russetfur was his mother, she would never go easy on him. She had not even raised him. After giving birth to him, Russetfur had handed the tom-kit over to Snip to take care of since she had her deputy duties to attend to. It was not fitting for a deputy to have kits which was the reason his parents were no longer together. Speckledpaw did not mind the lack of parenting he had received, he was always well-behaved. He had never grown close to Thicketpaw as a sister, everyone around him was only his friend. He considered himself family-less. This was the majority of the reason he would not bring himself to hate Darkpaw. They were too similar.

Russetfur eventually overpowered Speckledpaw in a long wrestling match that he almost won, but a misplaced hind paw into mud caused him to come crashing down and he was unable to regain his footing before he was effectively pinned. She said nothing as she allowed her distant son to get up and go back to sit with the other apprentices.

"Well?" the deputy asked expectantly.

Thicketpaw chose to step forward this time. Their fight was just a little shorter than Speckledpaw's, but it had the same result. Neither apprentice proved a worthy adversary for a warrior of Russetfur's caliber, but neither had Windlegs or Tigerstripe, or even Mudriver and Thundertail. They didn't have to beat her to pass, simply hold their own and at least come close. Thicketpaw had come close to a death blow twice while Speckledpaw had managed three. If he hadn't slipped it might have been four and he even might have won.

Darkpaw had no choice but to step forward this time as Russetfur looked him up and down. He was smaller than the other two and the youngest apprentice she had ever faced besides her own.

"Let's see what you can do," Russetfur said.

Darkpaw made a mistake. It was one he had told himself not to make, but he made it anyway. He rushed in. He hadn't meant to, but he did. His legs had been forming into springs and as soon as he had stepped forward it had turned into a charge.

Russetfur had him by the scruff and on the ground in no time, but it would not be as easy as that. Determined to make up for his stupidity, Darkpaw managed to escape Russetfur's clutches, but it would not last for long. He knew that as soon as he got close to her, he was in a danger zone. That had been demonstrated by both Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw. The blood-colored she-cat crouched and waited for him, but she would not wait forever. Darkpaw joined her in her game of waiting and eventually won as she sprang for him with more force and speed than he had ever seen anyone use. Her body was not the massive, brutal body Darkpaw faced in the ring. It was a sleek, perfected body that served to do one thing, conquer. She was quick and light and did not count on force but it simply came to her.

It was then that Darkpaw realized that he was not the great warrior he thought himself to be due to the ring. He was merely a ShadowClan apprentice here, but an amazing fighter to them because he had this body. It was a ShadowClan trained body even if it was not a ShadowClan born body. He beat those cats because they did not know the true way to battle, but ShadowClan did. ShadowClan were the masters at their fighting. They had their style and trained with it, perfected it, made it a trademark that was unstoppable. The ringfighters simply went with whatever suited them at the time, making them weak. Making them easily beatable if one had their own strategy mapped out properly. That was what Darkpaw needed now, strategy. Too bad for him, he realized that too late and was slammed and pinned on his back before he could figure one out.

"Not bad, you lot. Now, it's time for the hunting portion of your test. Be back here by sun down and catch all the prey you can until then. I'll be watching you so no funny business, understand?"

They all nodded and set off into the forest. Now was possibly the worst time to do a hunting exam. Prey was scarcer still and one had to be very, very precise in what they were doing to catch anything.

Darkpaw had confident he could bring at least something back. It was Speckledpaw he was worried for. Wait, worried? He shook his head at the thought. He wasn't worried. He was…well he didn't know but he wasn't sure of Speckledpaw's ability to excel in this part of their test, especially with the ground especially crunchy due to falling leaves. Leaving thoughts of Speckledpaw behind him, Darkpaw stalked thru the forest silently, determined to show his worth in this. Loosing to Russetfur had hurt his pride and he was going to prove to her what he could do. With his gift in full swing, he scented the area.

There didn't appear to be anything. No prey, and apparently no Russetfur either. Unless she was downwind and he couldn't smell her. He could only see things he could smell even if he didn't know he could smell them. He had never met anyone who was able to hide from him, but he was now unsure of the full extent of Russetfur's abilities and didn't want to rule anything out. But where Russetfur was didn't matter now anyway. What mattered was prey.

As he circled the forest, Darkpaw noticed a cat figure in a tree. It certainly was high and there was something else in the tree. Darkpaw got closer and opened his eyes. It was Speckledpaw high in a tree looking into a hollow a squirrel had made its home. It chattered angrily at him, probably because it was protecting its horde of babies. If Speckledpaw took this, he would have a very impressive kill to show Russetfur, but Speckledpaw turned and jumped out of the tree. He left the small stash untouched.

Darkpaw gaped. How could Speckledpaw turn down such an offer?! It would have been too easy even for Speckledpaw! Another scent had caught Darkpaw when his eyes were closed and when he checked he discovered that Russetfur was lurking in a bush watching the calico apprentice. She had seen what he had just done, all of it. There was no doubt she knew what was up there, what Speckledpaw had turned down. There was no way Speckledpaw would find anything more impressive than that and maybe even nothing at all. As far as Darkpaw figured, Speckledpaw had just given up his chance at becoming a warrior any time soon. Russetfur turned and left after it was clear that Speckledpaw was not turning back.

As soon as she was gone, Darkpaw burst out and confronted Speckledpaw. The calico seemed surprised to see the tabby but showed no other reaction.

"Why did you do it?" Darkpaw demanded.

"Do what?" Speckledpaw asked innocently. The thing about him was it sounded genuinely innocent.

"Those squirrels up there. Why did you just turn them down?"

"You mean why did _we _turn them down," Speckledpaw corrected.

"We? Who the hell is we?" Darkpaw asked. He hadn't turned anything down and Russetfur wasn't the one hunting.

"Neither me or you or even Thicketpaw are going to touch those squirrels, understand?" Speckledpaw said.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yes."

"And how do you expect to stop me?" Darkpaw was surprised when he found himself pinned to a nearby tree.

"Any way I need to. Don't be stupid, Darkpaw, this is not the time to start a fight," Speckledpaw said in a calm voice that contrasted his actions.

"My thoughts exactly, but now also isn't the time to be passing up food for the clan," Darkpaw responded without struggling. Speckledpaw would not do anything to harm him and they both knew it.

"Darkpaw, think for a moment would you? If I kill them now, then the clan will have probably the equivalent of two or three meals. But, if I wait until they get older, suddenly the number of meals they could produce multiplies. Plus, and stick with me here, if those squirrels grow up and breed, then we have more squirrels for next leaf-bare. Do you see where I'm going with this?" Speckledpaw asked.

Darkpaw did, but he had never thought of it that way before. Speckledpaw was planning ahead, way ahead. He could be a great leader if he wanted to.

"Yeah, I got it. I'll leave them alone," Darkpaw promised and Speckledpaw released him.

"Good, so, do you know how to hunt frogs yet?" Speckledpaw asked.

"Frogs?!" Darkpaw asked.

"That's a no. Ok well you'll learn eventually. It doesn't matter, there aren't many now anyway. You just stick with the forest, Mudriver will teach you soon probably. It's more of a night course," Speckledpaw said and walked off. "Oh and good luck," he called over his shoulder.

"Yeah, uh, you too," Darkpaw said, still preoccupied with frogs.

The rest of his hunt was mainly uneventful. He only managed to catch two small mice and a raven by the time it was time to return to Russetfur. He dropped his prey in front of her and noticed he was the second to arrive. Thicketpaw was already there with a vole and a sparrow.

Speckledpaw arrived a while later carrying another vole and a frog. The frog was killed rather messily as was the vole showing that by the time Speckledpaw had caught up with the damn creatures, he was a little frustrated and wanted to kill them before they got away. Both of them somehow seemed a little more pathetic in comparison to the kills of the other apprentices and it showed in Russetfur's face that she noticed.

The deputy nodded to the apprentices and led them back into the camp. They dropped their prey into the pile and ended up all going to the apprentices den since their mentors were all in Blackstar's den conversing with the leader and deputy.

"Think you passed?" Thicketpaw asked Speckledpaw.

Speckledpaw shrugged. "Maybe, maybe not. I'm think I did well with fighting, but we all know I'm a pathetic excuse for a hunter. You probably passed though, and Darkpaw."

Darkpaw looked up when he heard his name. "What?" he asked.

"Well you did catch the most and you held your own pretty good against Russetfur," Speckledpaw explained.

Thicketpaw didn't acknowledge this part of the conversation. Speckledpaw might be fine with talking to the rouge and such, but she still wasn't. The den was colder now without Tigerstripe, and Speckledpaw wasn't the type that offered warmth and comfort. He could, she knew, but he would never offer. He remained close emotionally, but distant physically. It was the reverse of what most cats that were like him would do if they got close in any way at all. She knew that if she asked, he would be more than willing to move closer to her and keep her warm as best he could with his skinny body, but Thicketpaw wasn't the type to ask. She was more the type to take, and she didn't want to take from Speckledpaw. It seemed unfair to the calico, but only in the calico's case. As usual, it seemed impossible to be cruel to those soft green eyes. She almost hated him for it sometimes, but it was impossible to hate him.

Speckledpaw noticed his friend's silence and looked over at her. His eyes asked if she was alright but his mouth did not. It didn't need to. Thicketpaw smiled faintly at him and he took it as the sign that she was fine. If she had wanted something, she'd have to ask.

"Thicketpaw, Speckledpaw, come to Blackstar's den," Russetfur called inside the apprentices' den.

Speckledpaw nodded a good-bye to Darkpaw before following Thicketpaw out of the den.

_

Inside Blackstar's den, the two apprentices and their mentors waited to hear what Russetfur and Blackstar had to say.

"Thicketpaw, we'll start with you," Blackstar said leaving Speckledpaw and Darkflower to willingly wait outside.

Speckledpaw looked up at the dark she-cat that was his mentor. "So did Russetfur say anything about me, yet?" he asked.

"No," Darkflower said simply, "Do you think you passed?"

"Well I almost beat her with the fighting, but my hunting is still lacking," Speckledpaw admitted honestly. There was no point in lying, Russetfur would explain it all anyway.

Darkflower tensed a little. "I just don't understand how you can't pick that up," she sighed, "You are very intelligent."

"I know I'm just not very quiet. The prey gets scared off before I can catch it. Then sometimes if it's a bird it makes that horrible cawing noise and I don't have a chance at anything," the calico said.

"Well let's hope it doesn't affect your warrior ceremony too much."

Their conversation was ended when Thicketpaw raced out of the den squealing with delight. Boulder followed after smirking in amusement.

"I take it all went well," Darkflower asked.

"Russetfur said her status was satisfactory and that about the only way she could learn more was to gain experience herself. Blackstar said she would be made a warrior before the next gathering," Boulder said.

"That's good news. Come, Speckledpaw," Darkflower called as Thicketpaw finished explaining the same thing to the other apprentice.

Speckledpaw nodded and followed his mentor inside, paws prickling with anticipation. His deputy and leader were waiting for him at the back of the dark den.

"So what is your review on Speckledpaw, Russetfur?" Blackstar asked.

"His talent for battle is unwaveringly impressive. During the test he was very near winning and might have if he hadn't slipped," Russetfur admitted, "His hunting, unfortunately, is nowhere near at the same level. He brought back only two pieces of prey and was late. He could have, however, brought back more when he ran across an entire brood of young squirrels and their parent."

Speckledpaw held his breath. She knew. No big deal, he could explain himself. He just hoped they could see things his way.

"Are you saying he passed up a chance at prey intentionally?" Blackstar asked.

Speckledpaw and Russetfur nodded. He could feel Darkflower's eyes piercing his fur.

"Would you like to explain that, Speckledpaw?" Blackstar offered.

Speckledpaw nodded again and looked up, trying to gather some confidence but there was no one he could turn to in order to get any reassurance. Not his mother, not his mentor, and not his leader. He took a deep breath and convinced himself that he had done nothing wrong and began, "The squirrel kits were very small and none of them alone would have provided a satisfactory meal. I figured that if I let them live to grow into adulthood or a least get bigger, it would be more rewarding then because the number of meals provided would multiply. If some of them even got away to mate, then there would be even more for next leaf-bare. We aren't in a state of crisis yet so I assumed it would not hurt to not have a few squirrels." Speckledpaw looked for any signs of approval. It had been much easier to explain this to Darkpaw.

Suddenly, amusement showed on his leader's face. "You are very cleaver, Speckledpaw. That was a wise decision. I've made up my mind. You will be made a warrior at the same time as Thicketpaw, but you must go on a hunting patrol or at least practice hunting with your mentor every day or night until then, understand?"

Speckledpaw nodded so quickly he thought his neck might snap but he didn't care. "Thank you, Blackstar," he said trying to sound calm even though his heart was racing. He looked up at Darkflower and she seemed to approve. Even Russetfur's face showed the faintest ghost of pride for a moment.

Speckledpaw exited the leader's den in stride with Darkflower until Thicketpaw raced up to him asking a million questions a second. He finally placed his nose to hers to silence her. "We will be made warriors at the same time if I hunt every day until then."

Thicketpaw squealed in excitement and told him they had to go tell Tigerstripe and Windlegs immediately. Speckledpaw almost couldn't keep up with her as they dashed to the warriors' den.

Darkpaw watched them go silently. He was sitting with Mudriver waiting to be called in by Russetfur. The time came and Darkpaw was temporarily in shock at the loss of light in the den. The discussion didn't involve much input on his part but Mudriver seemed very pleased.

Darkpaw was progressing at a very good pace and was way above average in hunting and fighting for an apprentice with his amount of training and especially his age and size. Darkpaw felt a bit of pride well up in him as he heard his praises. It was obvious he would not be made a warrior with the others, but at this rate there was no way he wouldn't be one soon enough.

Once they were out of the den, Mudriver nudged his apprentice. "Come on, let's find Thundertail," he suggested. Darkpaw agreed and they set off to find said she-cat.

Thundertail was just as impressed though not surprised by Darkpaw's review. "So you couldn't beat a seasoned warrior, huh?" she asked teasingly.

Darkpaw didn't respond. He was still a little sore about that.

"Don't worry, you'll get there," Mudriver laughed.

It was after moon high so the three cats decided that it was time for sleep. Darkpaw bid his friends 'goodnight' and walked into the den. Thicketpaw and Speckledpaw weren't there yet and he safely assumed that they were still talking with Windlegs and Tigerstripe. He sighed and curled up in his nest. It wasn't as cold anymore now that his sleek coat was growing thicker, but old habits die hard.

As he slept he thought about his fight with Russetfur and how he could constructively use that against Magi. One thing he knew for certain he had to remember, don't rush in. The scenarios of how his fight could go played over and over in his head until they became his dreams.

Thicketpaw entered the den with Speckledpaw not long later though it was colder. Speckledpaw laid down contently in his nest and sighed as he relaxed. Thicketpaw glanced at her nest and then her friend. It was very clear, her nest was cold and he was warm.

Speckledpaw's eyes fluttered open as he felt a body push its way into his embrace. Thicketpaw's scent flooded into his nose as the she-cat molded her body to his, purring lightly. Her face was buried in his chest and he felt her as he breathed. This was the closest he could remember getting to her with Tigerstripe around. The large tabby was normally her partner of choice, but he was not here anymore. The calico made no attempts to move or push his friend away. She was asking in her own way for him to keep her warm, and he would to the best of his ability. Speckledpaw fell asleep to the gentle purring of Thicketpaw as she slept and the melodic tap of the tip of her tail against his leg…

**Ok another longish chapter. This one was going to be longer, but then I decided to cut it in half. Break is over, unfortunately and Monday it's back to the books. Well I'll still try my best and sorry I couldn't produce more chapters. Reviews make Darkpaw happy and remind me to write faster!**


	19. Chapter 18

**Jeez it's been a while. Sorry you wouldn't believe how busy I've been. I'm already working on the next chapter but I have no idea when it will actually come out. And Ratkit makes a guest appearance in a flashback, along with Snaketail but who cares about her.**

For the first time, Darkpaw was curled up alone in the apprentices' den. Speckledpaw and Thicketpaw, now Speckledthorn and Thicketclaw, were silently guarding the camp. It was amazing for Darkpaw that Thicketclaw had managed to stop giggling long enough to complete the ceremony. Speckledthorn had been his usual calm and quiet self throughout the time just as Darkpaw had suspected he would.

Darkpaw couldn't sleep, though. He was buzzing with excitement. The next night was the gathering once again and he already knew he wasn't attending. That was probably a good thing since last time hadn't gone so well. It would be good to give the others a chance to warm up to the idea of him before introducing him in again. He smirked. Time spent not at the forest gathering would be time well spent doing other things. He knew he needed to return to the ring the next night. He didn't want the others to think he was a coward.

His tail whipped around him and he dug out his treasure, holding it close to him without fear of being caught. He could tell he was getting bigger because, while the bone used to be about equal to one of his own ribs, it was now clearly inferior to his size. He didn't care, though. It made him feel better to have it around. He slipped it back into its place as he realized the moon was fleeing in preparation for the sun and he needed his sleep. He sealed his eyes shut, slowly getting his mind to calm with his body and fell asleep.

_

Darkpaw welcomed Blackstar's announcement the next evening. Again, he didn't pay attention to who was going and who was staying. Of course all the new warriors would be attending along with Mudriver, Thundertail, Snaketail, Tawnypelt, and others he really didn't care about. He wanted them gone already. But patience was a virtue the little tabby forced himself to have. Tonight was an important night to him and he wasn't about to go fucking it up by doing something stupid. He said his 'goodbyes' to Thundertail and Mudriver and watched the warriors go as the sun set.

He strolled around camp for a while, ignoring all the remaining warriors. They ignored him, too, which he viewed as an improvement to previous times he had wandered the camp alone during a gathering. Of course he felt when a sharp gaze would turn on him when he wandered to close to the warriors, but those problems were quickly solved by a simple change of paw placement. He padded by Runningnose which he should have warned himself against, but he hadn't been thinking about it until it was too late and the elder had called out to him.

"Yes, Runningnose?" he asked answering the old tom's call.

"C'mere a minute, will you? Or do you have some big important thing to do by pacing around the camp?" Runningnose teased.

Darkpaw figured a small banter wouldn't hurt anything. "Yes, actually, I'm busy guarding the camp against snipes," he answered remembering the story of the creepy little imaginary creatures Snaketail had haunted him with when he was young.

Runningnose grinned. "Snipes, huh? And what makes you think you could take on a snipe, tiny?"

That would make Darkpaw think if he wanted to be creative with his answer. "Well, I'm not after the grown ones. You see, they send the little ones in first because they're almost invisible when they're young. They send the small ones in to infiltrate the place and secure it before the big ones come in and take it over. I'm plenty big to take on a little one," Darkpaw explained.

Runningnose was impressed. He had expected a short, pretend-hurt answer from the apprentice followed by him walking off. But Darkpaw seemed to be openly inviting him to carry this further. "Oh I see. But how will you find them if they're nearly invisible?"

"I can sense things without using my eyes. I'll know exactly where they are even if they are behind me and I'll never have to open my eyes at all," Darkpaw said and watched for Runningnose's reaction. Of course he had said that all with a stone-set serious face, but he couldn't be telling the truth. That was impossible, wasn't it?

Runningnose started to laugh. "Alright you win. I can't beat that."

Darkpaw smirked. Nope, no one believed him. It was probably a good thing, actually. He could completely surprise someone with it and with cats of this skill, surprise was one more luxury he would want to have. The ring would never be the threat the forest was so it didn't matter if the ringfighters knew. But as long as he was going to let them know, they had better believe him. He gave an exaggerated yawn considering he was wide awake.

"I'm going to go to sleep now, Runningnose. Goodnight," he said with a stretch.

"Goodnight, Darkpaw. I'll let you know any news I get of the gathering when you bring me my meal tomorrow."

"Thanks." Darkpaw turned and walked back to the apprentices' den, wiping the faux pleasant expression off his face. He curled up in his nest and waited until the camp was asleep, mostly, and crept out into the cold night.

His fur was now thick and made him seem a little bigger than he was and, according to both Thundertail and Windlegs, more soft and fluffy. StarClan, how he was learning to hate those words.

He slipped thru the territory easily and silently. Better than he had ever done before thanks to his night courses. He made it out of the ShadowClan territory and past the two-leg nest sooner and slipped down into the valley where the ring held four fighters, clearly teams of two and two. What surprised Darkpaw was that it was Tears and Crys against T.J. and J.T. He wasn't sure what was going on but he guessed that, like always, the answer to his question would come soon without really needing to be asked.

He sat at the edge of the ring, watching and was almost startled when the black mass that was Shadow moved. The tom was so silent and dark that it was easy for him to be right in front of you and you not even notice him until he moved or you realized his mismatched eyes were piercing right into your soul.

"So you have finally come for your battle?" Shadow asked not taking his eyes from the fight.

"Yeah, it's been too long. I missed it here," Darkpaw said following Shadow's lead of keeping his eyes on the fight.

"Careful with that thinking."

That took Darkpaw's eyes away and Shadow followed suit, meeting the ice blue with his own. "What do you mean?" the tabby asked.

"Cats who live by this place, usually die by it. You have to realize, the longer you stay here, the shorter your life will become." The black tom looked back at his sons. "I had kits with another she-cat before meeting Lynn. She was from a clan called BloodClan ruled by a ruthless killer named Scourge. I myself was with BloodClan for a little while, but when I decided to leave, I learned the price of my actions. I was untouched, but my kits and mate were torn apart upon Scourge's order by two cats named Snake and Ice. 'Blood for blood,' Scourge said, 'If you want to leave BloodClan you will leave all your blood behind with it.' He wasn't just speaking to me. He spoke to every cat there. That is not how it works here, though. I made sure of that. If you so choose to leave, you need only spill your own blood first. Others will not, and should not, be made to pay for your decision."

Darkpaw looked up into Shadow's hard green eye. Then a question occurred to him. "If you left BloodClan untouched, how did you get your scar?" Darkpaw was talking about the one that overtook the top of the tom's face amongst all the others on the sleek black body. Darkpaw immediately felt that perhaps it was not a good question to ask and thought about looking away but decided if it had already been said, he might as well follow thru with it.

"My mate gave it to me the night I told her I wanted to leave. She told me I would be the death of them all. She told me if I was going to try something as stupid as escaping I should at least do it when our kits were able to stand a chance. They were around three moons old when I suggested it. Scourge was going to take them away soon anyway. Families were not allowed to live together." The green eye had become clouded and blank as Shadow looked into the past.

They both snapped back into reality when it was announced that the fight was over. Tears and Crys had just missed being victorious in their battle to graduate into the full apprentice ranks. As they were being taken away, a new question occurred to Darkpaw.

"Why are they fighting together?" he asked as T.J. and J.T. approached.

"Because they want to continue as partners so they will have to graduate and battle together," Shadow explained, "T.J. and J.T. toyed with the idea, but decided against it. They still will on occasions, but they prefer to be separate since their styles are so different they have some difficulty synchronizing."

"Darkpaw! You're here! This is great. Go, go, go, go it's your time!" T.J. said shoving Darkpaw into the ring with a whispered 'good luck'.

Darkpaw was confused again. He hadn't planned this. Or had they? Every night? He didn't have time to think further into it as Magi entered the ring with her supreme confidence radiating around the arena. She looked directly at Darkpaw and pierced his thoughts, making him take an involuntary step back. She smirked like she knew what she had done.

In order to keep the rules of this special fight followed, it had to be ensured Darkpaw did not open his eyes to see. Something black was placed over his head and snapped in place behind his ears and at the base of his jaw line, blinding him completely. He didn't like the feel of it and every one of his instincts told him to get it off, but he left it. A cat he identified as T.J. came to lead him to his cage, but he broke away, walking in on his own to show his capabilities. Unfortunately the cage didn't really bare a scent so he had to guess about where it was, but he found the place teaming with leftover scents of anxiety and knew right away where he was. Several cats seemed impressed solely by this feat, but more had to be done to convince them fully.

Magi walked calmly into her crate. The thing with being blind was, while Magi knew she was in a confined space, she could not see the bars surrounding her. This gave her the opportunity to keep her head much better than her opponent when the state of madness was induced. Darkpaw was slowly slipping away before her "sightless" eyes and she knew it. Even though he too couldn't see the bars, his body was already programmed to panic when in that place and he was fully aware of where he was. She already knew a lot about the tabby. More than he would prefer anyone know. He had been hurt, badly, by someone he should have been permitted to trust. He didn't fully know it yet, but that had sent him careening towards self-destruction. Oh yes, he would be fun to toy with once she brought those nasty memories up for him to re-live. She was undefeated for a reason. The horror behind the eyes of many of the cats here was enough to bring them to their own ruination. All she had to do was bring it back up for them to see. All the horrific times, all at once. She didn't have to do a damn thing. Her eyes were a blank sheet for her to print anything she wanted them to see on and she wanted them to see themselves. Their own, tortured selves.

The cage door opened and Magi stepped out. Darkpaw had bolted, like she knew he would. He didn't like confined spaces. They were too much like a trap. Like the nursery had been. And that meant confined spaces brought pain and terror, he had to get out.

Darkpaw found her easily. Her life signature held an odd hue to it that he could not quite place but where her eyes should have been was completely white. Not black like death, but blank white. In his confusion, she rushed him, knocking him off his paws quicker than anyone else had. Clearly she could see him too, and she had probably sensed his hesitation and taken the advantage. Darkpaw cursed himself and was about to spring up when she held him down and her white eyes turned to a sharp blue that matched the color of Darkpaw's own eyes and he fell in. Into where, he did not know, but he was falling.

_

_Falling. He hit the ground hard with a thud. It hurt, but he was struck again and he rolled several more mouse-lengths. It was Snaketail hurting him. He had done something wrong. What was it?_

"_Momma?" a weak voice called form the other side of the den._

_Darkpaw looked up. It was Ratkit. He was alive? Of course, Ratkit had woken up during one of the few times Snaketail did not have all her attention devoted to him and Darkpaw had approached the confused kit. That had been a mistake. He was never to go near Ratkit. Ratkit was more precious than he was and he was not to get his half-blood filth on the precious-one._

_He hadn't meant to upset Snaketail, but Ratkit had been very confused when he had woken up. He was just trying to comfort him until Snaketail got back. But she had come back all too quickly for Darkpaw and slung the young kit into the air with a furious screech._

"_Momma?" Ratkit repeated just before Snaketail's paw was going to collide with Darkpaw's head._

"_What is it, my love?" she asked her mood changing significantly as she spoke to Ratkit._

"_What are you doing to my brother?"_

_Oh Darkpaw would pay dearly for that. He could tell because of how Snaketail's claws flexed and her tail and neck stiffened._

"_He's not your brother," Snaketail said barely able to keep her voice above a hiss._

"_He called you 'momma' too once. When you were hitting him that other time. He said 'momma, please stop!'."_

_Darkpaw had paid then too. Snaketail was not his mother. She never would be. She had made it perfectly clear to Darkpaw the night he had made that mistake._

"_He was just being stupid, love. He's not your brother. He's just trash. You rest now," Snaketail said sweetly before turning back on Darkpaw._

_Darkpaw faintly could see Ratkit behind her. He thought he saw something flash in the older kit's eyes. He thought he recognized it now but he hadn't then. Pity. Ratkit had felt sorry for Darkpaw. But there was not time to dwell on that. It was time for his punishment to continue._

_

Darkpaw hissed his protest at the memory being forced back before his eyes. And he was feeling the pain also. Magi, thru some trick the blind she-cat possessed, was also watching the memory. Every pain, every torment Snaketail hit him with, she did as well only worse. She wasn't holding back because he was a kit and she needed to keep him alive. He felt all the pain Snaketail had _wanted _to deliver to him now and it hurt much worse than when she had done it the first time.

At some point Darkpaw had scrambled to his paws and struggled to shake his head clear of the memories. While he did that, Magi slammed into him again. He batted her off this time. Determined to keep her out of his head. She managed to get behind him but he could see her and he let her know by jumping her this time. But she was quick. It was as if she knew his moves a split second before he did them. Like she was thinking with him as well as on her own. As she knocked him down again he knew he would need to find a way around this. Her eyes turned ice blue again and he felt terror grip him.

_

_He backed away from Snaketail slowly. He was trembling all over, wishing he could have a heart attack so he wouldn't have to endure this. What was this? Where was he? Snaketail was distraught. Her steps were clumsy and drunken as she advanced on her poor adopted son._

"_It's your fault," she croaked, "Your fault he's gone. You did it. You made me pay some fucking attention to you when he needed me. You fucking little bastard you planned it!" She screamed at the end and Darkpaw heard his younger quivering voice squeak out._

"_Please! No I didn't! It's not my fault! Please! Don't do this! I'm sorry!" he cried._

_Oh StarClan not this memory! Anything but this memory. Ratkit had just died. Darkpaw hadn't even been anywhere near them at the time. He had been fading since before Darkpaw had even woken up and Darkpaw hadn't dared go near them as Littlecloud and Runningnose worked. Darkpaw hadn't even eaten. In all seriousness, he too was worried for Ratkit. He hardly knew the tom, but whenever Ratkit was awake and Snaketail was tormenting him, he would draw her attention away somehow. Whether on purpose or just because he was really sick Darkpaw didn't know but he appreciated it. He didn't want Ratkit to die. But Ratkit had died and oh how the small tabby had paid. He had paid so dearly for his sin of existing every day after that but this night was the worst. Fresh with grief, Snaketail had beaten him until he was nearly unconscious. She was a crafty bitch, not causing any blood, only internal damage so he wouldn't need to be seen by the medicine cat and have some suspicion arise._

_Darkpaw would endure any memory, any time, any night other than this one. It was too much. Just the first blow had had him begging for it to stop. He was already sore and he didn't want more. But it hadn't stopped. Not until Snaketail passed out on her own did it stop and even then his hurt body throbbed and he could not follow into the sweet release of sleep. Any time but this one. Any time…_

_

"NO!!!" Darkpaw screamed and kicked out with his hind legs. He caught Magi in her stomach and sent her staggering back. While she was forcing him into his memories, she had not expected him to be able to move. Most other cats couldn't. The strain of the memory was too much. But Darkpaw's determination to not re-live that single one was enough to break him out of her spell. He would not allow himself to be hurt like that again if he could help it and he would kill himself trying.

Darkpaw sat still, glaring at her through the blindfold, waiting for her to make a move. But surprisingly, she didn't. She just kept staring at the space he was occupying. No, not directly at him, a little to his left. He was confused by this. Why wasn't she moving? Was this a trick? His tail whipped once, and immediately she rushed at him again as if that had been the cue she was waiting for.

Darkpaw went to move, but, once again, she knew what he was going to do. He decided the only way to keep her from thinking his thoughts, was to not think clearly. For a few seconds, he stopped calculating and blindly began lashing and springing at her like he was possessed. He lept behind her and then stood still once again, at a loss of what to do next so he just watched how she handled his episode to see if it was a worthwhile plan at all.

Magi was confused. She spun around, hissing, but again she was not looking at Darkpaw. She wasn't even near his direction this time. She seemed to sense this and took several steps to her right.

Darkpaw held his breath. She was right in front of him. They were practically nose to nose. But she didn't attack him. What was she doing? She could take him out in a single well-placed blow right now. But to place a proper strike, she'd have to know where he was. An idea struck Darkpaw and, still without a plan, he tested it. He clawed the side of Magi's face and sprang away, holding perfectly still again.

Magi hissed and was about to strike him but he disappeared. The outlines of the crowed flashed at her as some of the cats moved. But the one she was focusing on was gone. Then there was a flash just out of the corner of her eye and she launched herself in that direction.

Darkpaw flinched intentionally and, as he had predicted, Magi began to bare down on him. He dashed to the side to avoid her claws crushing him but so long as he was moving, she knew where he was. With all this information in mind, he began working on a strategy that, if it didn't end with him winning, would hopefully spare his life.

_

"Hey, Tigerpaw!"

Tigerstripe ignored the voice of the grey she-cat.

"Tigerpaw!" Dawnpaw repeated impatiently.

"He's not gonna answer you. His name's Tigerstripe now," Windlegs said.

"What?! Really?! Lucky! You're warriors now?" Dawnpaw asked.

"Yep," Tigerstripe said with a proud smirk, forgetting his silence.

"All of the apprentices became warriors," Thicketclaw said.

"All? Even Dark-"

"Ok all the apprentices that matter," Tigerstripe cut in before Dawnpaw could finish the name.

"Tigerstripe!" Windlegs hissed.

"What?! I thought we were over this, Windlegs!"

"Who said we were over you viewing yourself over your clanmate?!"

"Don't call him that!"

"And why the hell not?!" Windlegs was seething with anger towards her brother. Sure she had been a little upset with Darkpaw for a while, but it hadn't permanently changed her view of him.

"Tigerp-stripe, maybe you should just let it go. Let her call him what she wants," Dawnpaw said, touching Tigerstripe's muscled shoulder with the tip of her tail.

Tigerstripe glanced at her and did relax slightly. He was still clearly sore with his sister, but now was not the time or place to discuss it.

"So what are your names? I mean I know you're Tigerstripe and Windlegs now, but what about you two?" Dawnpaw asked eagerly looking at the remaining two ShadowClan newly-made warriors.

"I'm Thicketclaw and he's Speckledthorn," Thicketclaw answered allowing the practically invisible Speckledthorn to remain silent.

"So where's Nightpaw?" Windlegs asked.

"Oh yeah, how could I forget?! She's a warrior now too! Her name's Nightshade. Oh wait, did she want to tell you that? Ok if she tells you act surprised, but she's with the other warriors right now. I might be a warrior by the next gathering too!" Dawnpaw said.

"Congratulations," Tigerstripe said slightly out-of-character in doing so but no one really paid attention as the gathering started.

_

Darkpaw wasn't sure which of them were in worse shape, him or Magi. But upon seeing a miniscule drop of blood grace the snowy fur, he brought it up as him ahead, though not by much. She hadn't gotten him down again, but it wasn't for lack of trying. For a few scary moments he had been walking around seeing the nursery around him and Magi had miraculously morphed into Snaketail. But that had been the only close call.

So staying still and then attacking worked to some degree, but only if he was close enough to strike before she "saw" him. Currently they were on opposite ends of the ring, both at a loss for their next move. Darkpaw decided he would need to draw her in and time his moves perfectly to get the advantage before she could. He began to walk towards her and she did the same, breaking her cycle of rushing. Darkpaw waited until she was just within his reach with a powerful jump. He crouched and sprang with all his might planning to land on the she-cat's shoulders. It all would have worked perfectly had Darkpaw not needed to crouch.

As soon as Magi saw this movement she timed her dodge perfectly. Darkpaw landed right where his target should have been but could not react quickly enough to retaliate against her new position before she had him down. She didn't try to place him in a trance this time but instead grabbed his scruff.

Darkpaw went limp for a moment until she released him and backed away. She had won. Darkpaw was angry, very angry. He growled even as T.J. removed his blindfold. He opened his eyes and hissed at first from the sudden brightness of the fire around him before his eyes adjusted.

"You fought well, my friend. I don't think anyone can doubt your ability now," T.J. said trying to comfort the angered kit but it did little.

Magi turned out towards the crowd. "Would anyone still like to challenge this kit? Kuma?" she called with a challenge in her voice.

Kuma stepped out, shaking his head. "Your gift is truly remarkable, young one. I would be honored to see you in a fight one day," the orange tom said dipping his head to Darkpaw.

That itself, brought back some of Darkpaw's pride and he smirked. "As would I." Darkpaw's moment was ruined, however, as a silver tom and a golden she-cat pushed their way into the ring.

"Hey, let me get a better look at this kit," the tom ordered. Scars covered his body and were most prominent crossing his chest. He held an air of dominance thickly around him.

"What is it, Frost?" the she-cat asked. She too had scars but they blended more easily into her fur. Dog and cats teeth were jammed into the kitty-pet collar she wore.

Something about these cats filled Darkpaw with a flood of emotions. Hatred, anger, and dread gripped him but he couldn't place why.

"Does he look familiar to you?" the tom now identified as Frost asked his companion.

"He's a silver tabby, there's lots of those," the she-cat said, not really paying attention to Darkpaw.

"I feel like I've seen him somewhere before. And I don't mean here." Frost cut off the she-cat before she could point out the obvious. "Hey, kit, who's your parents?" Frost demanded.

"What concern is it of yours?" Darkpaw growled. These cats made him uneasy. He had the same familiar feeling towards them as Frost was having towards him.

"Look, it doesn't matter, it's time to go. Come on, Slash will be waiting," the she-cat insisted.

"Alright, fine, Honeydew, let's go!" Frost growled with obvious impatience. "See ya around, kit."

The pair left but Darkpaw's uneasiness didn't. He heard Lynn announce the night was over and his head shot up to the sky. It was starting to brighten ever so slightly.

"Shit!" he shouted and streaked off. He heard T.J. call something after him but couldn't discern it because he was already too far away and the wind was roaring in his ears.

He only slowed when he got to the edges of the camp. He closed his eyes and discovered the warriors were just coming back. Holding his breath, he jumped into the camp just as the warriors began to trickle in through the entrance. No one noticed him as he snuck into the apprentices' den. He crouched in the shadows and watched them. Once they were all in the warriors den, he proceeded to groom himself like he never had before having not had the chance to disguise the scents of the ring.

_

Blackstar paced in his den, unable to sleep just yet. He was going over the events of the gathering in his head. As he had suspected, Darkpaw hadn't been dropped despite his failure to show up.

'_Hey, Blackstar, where's your little rouge? You chase him out yet or do you have him looking for others to bring in?'_

'_Blackstar, did you make your little pet a warrior too?'_

Blackstar had needed to remind himself more than once that it was against the warrior code to shed blood at a gathering. More like ten times actually.

"Blackstar, are you alright?" Littlecloud asked walking into the dark den.

"Brilliant, Littlecloud," Blackstar responded sarcastically. "I just don't understand how so much trouble could be seen over one little kit regardless of who his father is. Brambleclaw didn't get as much grief as this."

"Brambleclaw is ThunderClan," Littlecloud reminded his leader.

"So? What's the big deal, he's a kit! What do they think he's going to do? Sprout wings and breathe fire all over the forest?"

"Blackstar that's ridiculous."

"Is it?!"

"Maybe you should consult StarClan, go to Highstones," Littlecloud suggested. Something in him was telling him that Blackstar really should go. "Besides, you still need to take Darkpaw."

"What?! He's only seven moons!" Blackstar protested.

"But he's half-way done with his training."

Blackstar had forgotten that momentarily in the muddle that was becoming his thoughts. He shook his head. "He's too young, still. He'd never make it. I'll take him in a couple of moons when he's bigger. Nine moons is more normal anyway."

"Fine, but I'm sure if we have this much trouble with Darkpaw, StarClan must be thinking something about him," Littlecloud said before walking out of the den, leaving his leader to his thoughts.

Blackstar hadn't considered that before. But it was a good explanation. He decided before falling asleep that as soon as Darkpaw was nine moons old he would take the kit to Highstones and see just what his purpose was for ShadowClan…

**Ok not as long a chapter as the others have been but it's still average. C'mon I'm trying. Reviews make Darkpaw happy!**


	20. Chapter 19

**Ok I know it's been forever! I really can explain why I was gone so long but I'm going to do that later since you all probably want to read the story by now.**

_He was running. Why was he always running? Because someone wanted him dead. Why did someone always want him dead? Because he was alive. For as long as his life continued, someone would try to end it. True, his life was unfair. But true as well, he clung to it for it was the last thing he had left in the forsaken world he occupied. The world that no one else wanted him to occupy._

_Darkpaw was being chased, but he wasn't sure by whom or what. It didn't really matter who they were. They wanted to hurt him. Though that wasn't a new development for his dreams. Chancing a glance behind him, he saw a brown figure racing right behind him. He should have seen that coming. Panic rose up in him and for a moment he reveled in the familiarity before claws slashed at his hind quarters and he sped up. He knew she wouldn't catch him. She never did, but something bad would happen. Something bad always happened and once again, he reveled in the familiar sensation._

_It sickened him a little, to enjoy the feelings of panic and fear and horror, but they were familiar and didn't change and they were all he had to cling to. He could no longer imagine his life without these horrific dreams or even imagine having a happy dream. That would be too different and he would never feel safe, always sure something would go terribly wrong._

_He felt himself growing tired and knew if he didn't find shelter soon he'd be torn to bits. Then, a black figure appeared before him and he felt hope rise in his chest and travel though his body, up into his throat and out his mouth in a joyous cry of:_

"_Momma!"_

_The word seemed to cause Snaketail to fade away into the dark plane he was still running on. He didn't look back, now focused on his destination. Filled with new energy, Darkpaw sped up even more until he reached the black fur that he knew to be the only being that had ever tried to take care of him and do what was best for him even if it was a misguided and wrong choice. Darkpaw wasn't sure there would have been a right choice in dealing with him anyway. But something was wrong. His mother was cold and, like many dreams before, there was no sign of life. He felt something seep into his fur and he pulled away. His mother's body fell to the ground, bloody and ruined. Her blood now stained his fur as he gaped in horror at the all-too familiar sight. Scratches gashed open her flesh all over. Her mouth was ripped open in a horrific, silent scream. Her eyes bulged out and burned into Darkpaw's through their dead glaze. Her limbs were twisted in a shadow of the pain she had felt before she died. The fatal blow was a horrible gash splitting her throat just below her chin. Dark blood still oozed from the wound. Darkpaw could feel some of this blood slithering across his skin and matting his fur from his forehead to his front paws, from neck to shoulders. He could hear the echo of his mother's screaming as the thick blood slid down his nose and crawled down his trembling legs. But it wasn't his mother's voice that was screaming. It was his. His throat lamented his sorrow and terror and horror of its own accord. His eyes had become painfully wide and he was forced to turn away and swipe off another drop of blood that threatened his eye._

_He heard laughing and looked up to see three more familiar figures not far away, a golden she-cat, a black and white tom, and a silver tom. All of them were stained with blood. His mother's blood. They were the ones responsible for this. They had killed her. And soon, his suspicion was proven when they began to speak._

"_Aw, what's the matter, baby? We hurt your mommy?" the gold she-cat asked in a mocking tone._

"_She probably didn't want you anyway," the silver tom said._

"_Yeah, why else would she leave you to a bunch of cats that want you dead even more than us?" the last tom added._

_Darkpaw felt his horror instantaneously become fury and he launched himself at the offending cats. But they continued to laugh as suddenly the ground disappeared from under him and he was sucked down into a black hole. Invisible claws raked at his coat and pulled him down, just as Magi's eyes had. He felt like he was suffocating and gasped for air. Just as he thought he would pass out, it stopped._

_He landed hard and looked around in confusion for a moment before realizing he was in the nursery._

"_Not again," he moaned to himself. He looked around for Snaketail but did not see her. Something brown in the corner caught his eye, but when he looked over, he found it was only Ratkit._

_Ratkit was mewling and thrashing in his sleep, apparently having some sort of nightmare. He wasn't the only one. Darkpaw knew better than to go over there, but he didn't like seeing Ratkit in distress and if Ratkit kept thrashing like that he ran the risk of hurting his fragile body._

_Suddenly, the little tom's eyes flew open and he cried the phrase Darkpaw had so many times before. "Momma? Momma! Where are you?!"_

_Darkpaw knew better than to go over there. He shouldn't go over there. It would only bring him pain if he went. But his body worked without him and his legs carried him across the den. He tried desperately to stop himself, ordering his paws to stop, but he knew they wouldn't and they didn't._

"_It's ok, Ratkit. She'll be back. Snaketail only went out for a little while, she'll be right back," Darkpaw said, terror setting into his heart and freezing him from the inside. He wasn't supposed to be near Ratkit and he definitely wasn't supposed to talk to him, but again he couldn't stop himself. It was as if someone else was controlling his body and forcing him to watch the damage they were doing._

_Ratkit turned to the silver tabby and his eyes calmed instantly. "Brother, why do you call our mother 'Snaketail' instead of 'momma' anymore?" Ratkit asked._

_Darkpaw stiffened, glancing around to make sure Snaketail wasn't back yet. "She's not my mother, Ratkit, and I'm not your brother," he said slowly._

"_But you called her 'momma' once."_

"_Well that was wrong of me to do and I'm never going to make that mistake again."_

"_That's right," a scratchy voice hissed from behind the two toms._

_Darkpaw didn't want to turn around, but he didn't have to. A heavy paw slammed into his side and sent him crashing to the ground. He barely had enough wits about him to pull himself back up._

"_Get the fuck away from my son!" Snaketail screamed._

_Darkpaw nodded and tried desperately to run away, far away, but now he couldn't move his paws. Looking down he realized the den floor around him had become mud and was sucking him down into it. His paws were completely captured and he did not have the strength to pull them out._

"_I said MOVE!" Snaketail shouted, striking his head and making him dizzy._

"_I can't!" he nearly sobbed as he felt the mud slowly creeping up his legs and lapping hungrily at his soft underbelly, eagerly tasting its meal. He didn't know whether to cry in terror or try to lash out back at Snaketail, but the mud swallowing his body had also swallowed up his courage and he trembled, breathing heavily._

"_Fine then. You want to stay there? I'll make you stay there forever!" Snaketail laughed and used her paw to smash Darkpaw's face into the mud._

_Darkpaw flew into panic, struggling to free his head before the mud could seep into his nostrils and open mouth and into his lungs. In a frenzy, he freed his head with black mud still clinging to his face. He heard Snaketail laugh and barely managed to get a breath in before she forced him down again. This time she kept her paw on his head so he could not have a chance at freeing himself. The mud climbed his shoulders and sides, captured his tail, and yanked at his back. He felt the bottoms of his ears come into contact with the ooze and felt as if his whiskers were being pulled out. Snaketail's paw moved but he couldn't pull himself free anymore. He wanted to scream but he couldn't move his mouth. The mud embraced his back, crushing his lungs with its weight. It wrapped around his throat and invaded his ears. Finally he felt the tips of his ears get sucked under and the mud closed around the back of his head and he knew he would never return to the surface._

_

Darkpaw jolted awake, panting heavily and trembling. He shook himself to bring his mind back into reality. He could move. He could breathe. He was alive. The last one could be taken either way but he added it as a plus that he hadn't died the horrible death his mind had used on him. He searched in the nest beneath him with his paw and pulled out his treasure, hugging it to his face affectionately. A small, shaky purr escaped his throat before he licked the bone and replaced it. He finally stood, shook himself, stretched, and padded out of the den into the cold morning.

His hopes at being the first one awake were dashed when he saw a small group of warriors walk out of their den. Among them was a horridly familiar orange tabby tom. Darkpaw rolled his eyes as the older tabby made a straight bee-line for him as soon as they made accidental eye contact.

"What are you doing up so early, rouge?" Tigerstripe demanded.

"I could ask you the same thing," Darkpaw responded with a slight yawn to show his disinterest in the older tom.

Tigerstripe saw it as a challenge. "_I'm _serving _my _clan."

"Oh, so you're finally going to go live in the dump and let the rest of us have some peace for once?" Darkpaw asked sarcastically, though he wasn't sure he was kidding.

Tigerstripe's claws flexed to show off his annoyance. "I'm on the dawn patrol, bastard," he growled.

"You know, Tigerpa-cl-stripe, it's not good to forget your clanmates' names," Darkpaw said with a smirk.

Tigerstripe looked ready to slash his claws across the apprentice's face to give him scars to match his own. The pink lines tracing across his still-handsome face moved fluidly as he snarled. The stiffness was gone from the flesh and now the marks were merely reminders of why the silver and black tom was not to be trusted.

"Hey, Tigerstripe, stop playing with Darkpaw and get your ass over here!" Russetfur called from the camp exit.

Tigerstripe grudgingly complied, shooting glares at Darkpaw over his shoulder.

Darkpaw just grinned in response and watched the patrol leave. He turned to make his way to the fresh kill pile, only to discover someone had beaten him to it. Another familiar coat gleamed back at him in the low light. It was a brown one this time. On another day, Darkpaw would have shied away and tried to avoid his former foster mother, but for some reason, today he longed to engage his enemies and they just kept showing up for him. Lifting his tail and head high, he strutted over to Snaketail.

"Aren't you supposed to hunt for the clan first?" Darkpaw asked.

Snaketail tried to hide the fact that Darkpaw had startled her. She stood to her full height and glared down at the tom. "I'm surprised a rouge bastard like you knows such rules. As a warrior, that rule no longer applies to me, but for your information, I was on a night hunting patrol you ingrate," she hissed.

Darkpaw was getting used to glares by now and he wasn't at all intimidated by Snaketail's size compared to him especially after seeing her jump. "Ingrate? Finally someone has become creative in naming me. I was beginning to think the only insults you idiots knew were 'bastard' and 'rouge'," Darkpaw drawled calmly.

"You are what you are and it's partially my fault that you aren't dead right now like my son," Snaketail said.

"Your son? Precious Ratkit? I liked him. He had a very nice name for me. It was 'brother'. Kind of catchy, don't you think? It's too bad he died. If he'd become the great warrior you thought he'd be, we could have made a nice team. A brother/brother team. Doesn't that sound nice?" Darkpaw asked as a cruel smirk twisted across his face at Snaketail's reaction.

"My son was not your brother!" she hissed and tried to swipe at Darkpaw, but Darkpaw had predicted this and dodged.

Darkpaw was enjoying his new game too much to stop now. He began to prance around Snaketail, going on in a sing-song voice that had never belonged to him before. "That's not what he said. He said I was his brother. And he loved me like one, too. He loved me, momma. My big brother loved me, his little brother! Brother, brother, why did you have to die? Oh brother, brother, come back! You made me and momma cry. Brother, brother-"

"STOP!" Snaketail screeched and launched herself at the silver tom.

Darkpaw ran under her and shot off into the brush, laughing as he went.

Darkpaw finally stopped and glanced behind him to ensure he wasn't being pursued. When he was sure he was safe, he allowed himself to calm down. The realization of what he had just started so willingly hit him. He'd never started a fight like that before. Shaking his head he began to think his battle with Magi had affected him more than he had expected. Allowing the she-cat to infiltrate and mess with his already-broken mind may have thrown something deep inside him off-balance and he made a mental note to watch himself from now on.

To try to clear his head, Darkpaw began wandering through the forest, allowing his paws to move independently. The sun had finally brought itself up enough to light the forest before Darkpaw stopped to look at where he was.

The sunlight streaked down and hit the cold forest floor between the less dense branches of the trees here. The trees here were old. Their lower branches had dropped down into the ground and become roots, spreading out to become new trees. One tree in the center seemed to be the cause of it all. It was the biggest and had the thickest branches, throwing the soil around it into complete darkness. There was no sound of prey or even the smell of cats here. Darkpaw walked through the rays of sun until he reached the darkness. The air suddenly became like ice in his lungs and he knew that even in the warmest of temperatures on the brightest of days, no sun touched here. This was the ShadowClan burial ground. Live in the shadows, die in the shadows, rest forever in the shadows.

Darkpaw had only been here once before to see a small, sick kit get laid in the ground. Snaketail didn't know he had been here. She thought she had left him in the nursery, but Darkpaw had followed the troop of cats silently as they came here. The wails of sorrow his foster mother had made were like no sound Darkpaw had ever heard before or had ever heard since. He knew she would be distraught when she got back, but he forced himself to go back to the nursery and wait for her. Running away would be a cowardly move.

Slowly, the apprentice made his way to the spot they had put Ratkit. It was right next to one of the tree's great roots that jutted out of the ground. The ground was frozen and Darkpaw was sure this must be the coldest place in the forest, even colder than where the icy breezes blew, because this was a place of death. No grass tried to push itself into the world here and no animals wanted to raise their young here, but they would bury them here.

He had only been here that one time and he wasn't sure how he had managed to get back here or why he had come back. He could faintly smell Snaketail here, but that wasn't a surprise. There was nothing special about this patch of earth. It looked the same as anywhere else, but under here was the corpse of a kit that was doomed the moment he was conceived, and standing above it was a kit with the same curse but a different fate. The similarities between himself and his foster brother caused Darkpaw to smirk at the irony of their twisted fates. Then Darkpaw began to speak. He didn't know why because no one was around to hear him, but it didn't matter to him today.

"We're strangely alike, you and me," he whispered to the buried body of Ratkit, "Neither you nor I had a chance at a good life. It's too bad, if you had lived, you'd be like royalty. And if I'd died, I might be happy, so would everyone else. Maybe there's a place I would go where my mother and father are and no one else. Wanna trade places? I know we can't, but I wish I could have you back. You were the only one who cared what happened…in there.

"Two kits, one born in love and the other born in hate. Fate decided to take one away, out of the world forever. Love did not prevail." Darkpaw sighed sadly then his ego kicked up again. "No offense, but your mom's a real bitch. She adored you though, but you probably already knew that." Darkpaw stopped. He didn't belong here. This was a place for ShadowClan and he hadn't proven himself in yet. "Good bye, brother," he said quietly before turning and walking back the way he had come, "Maybe we'll meet again when it's my turn to die."

Ratkit had pitied him. Ratkit had been the only one to pity him. Ratkit had died. And ever since then, Darkpaw would never accept the pity of any other cat. He didn't care if Mudriver or Thundertail or even Windlegs tried to care about him, but he wouldn't accept pity. Pity hadn't gotten him through the nursery and it wouldn't get him through the rest of his life. However long or short it may be.

_

Darkpaw strode back into camp not long later. He looked around and discovered the dawn patrol hadn't returned yet. Feeling bored, he looked around for something to do. 'Something' came in the form of a white she-cat stretching as she left the warriors' den and the dawn patrol slowly filing back into the camp. Darkpaw caught Tigerstripe's glare and raced him to reach Windlegs first. Darkpaw won.

"Morning, Windlegs, you wanna hunt with me?" he asked mustering up all the cheerfulness he could.

"Since when do you want to do something with me?" the white warrior responded suspiciously.

Darkpaw felt a twinge of annoyance but swallowed it down. "Well fine, if you don't want to I'll just go by myself." Darkpaw made like he was going to walk off but he was stopped by Windlegs's voice.

"No, I'll go, I was just surprised that's all," Windlegs protested.

"Well then let's go," Darkpaw said. He began to walk towards the exit once again and Windlegs fell into step beside him.

"What are you doing?" Tigerstripe demanded walking in front of the pair.

"Going hunting, Tigerstripe, is that a crime?" Windlegs spat.

"With him, maybe," the older tom said fixing his cold eyes on Darkpaw's.

"Shut up and leave us alone," Windlegs hissed and pushed past her brother.

Darkpaw just grinned and followed her, shooting an arrogant look at Tigerstripe as he left as little space as possible between himself and Windlegs without touching her. Tigerstripe growled and stalked off causing Darkpaw's mood to rise even more.

As they padded through the forest, Darkpaw found his eyes wandering to the she-cat beside him. He was shorter than her still, but he was slowly gaining height. He knew he'd be small and lean his entire life, but that didn't bother him, he preferred it to the short stockiness of Tigerstripe. Windlegs's shoulders rippled under her coat. Blackstar had done well with training her, but that was to be expected from the leader. Darkpaw noticed Windlegs glance down at him and he quickly looked away, trying to justify his admiration in his mind. She was a strong warrior, and he respected that. That was all.

Windlegs tried not to giggle at the now flustered Darkpaw. His ice blue eyes challenged even her own in beauty, but they were so cold. When he had been watching her, she felt as though she could feel the ice in his gaze. It made her fur and flesh tingle with unknown sensations. She struggled to remember if they had always been like that, those bright eyes. She wished she could have known him better when he first came to ShadowClan. Surely he wasn't born like this. The kit she had seen left by his mother that night had had the potential to be so much more.

_

_Windpaw crouched behind her mother with her brother as the clan was suddenly in an uproar over an uninvited visitor. The black she-cat had been standing protectively over something, but Windpaw didn't have a good view of it._

"_What is it, mother?" Windpaw asked._

"_Rouges!" Tigerpaw answered angrily._

_Windpaw moved and finally saw a small tabby kitten cowering close to the she-cat's leg. He looked terrified. His ice blue eyes were wide and glassy as he looked at the cats surrounding him. Innocence and fear were all that could be read on the blue canvas and the scent of his terror carried all the way to where Windpaw was._

_The she-cat was talking to Blackstar now but Windpaw wasn't paying attention to them. Finally, they stopped talking and the she-cat left. Horror twisted across the kit's face as he tried to follow her quickly but was stopped by Littlecloud's paw then picked up by Blackstar. He let out a squeak of protest and tried to struggle free but his body was forced to go limp in the leader's jaws. Windpaw could see the silver and black bundle trembling in her mentor's mouth._

"_What's Blackstar doing?!" Tigerpaw hissed._

"_Shh," Thistlefeather hissed, "Just stay away from him."_

"_Fine," Tigerpaw said glaring in the direction of the nursery where the horrified kit had been taken._

"_Windpaw?" Thistlefeather asked._

"_Oh, yes mother," Windpaw said quickly and nodded. She stared at the nursery where the new kit had disappeared from view. _

_He had looked so terrified. Horror had been written all over his face the moment he was stopped from following his mother back into the forest. No doubt he was confused at why he was being abandoned. _

_Windpaw didn't want to think of what it would be like if her own mother left her somewhere. Instinctively, she pressed against her mother's side and shivered. Thistlefeather, thinking her daughter was made uneasy by the new kit, comfortingly pressed her nose to Windpaw's shoulder._

"_Just stay away from him," Thistlefeather whispered._

_But Windpaw didn't want to stay away from him. She wanted to make him feel better like her family was making her feel better right now. The kit's entire world had just left him. Tigerpaw made sure Windpaw didn't think about the dark tabby while he was around. But for the several moons that followed, Windpaw wondered how no one else could hear the screams and cries that slipped from behind the nursery walls every night and day._

_

"Windlegs, stop!"

Windlegs was brought back to reality suddenly by Darkpaw's shout. "Huh? What is it?" she asked seeing the apprentice had stopped several tail lengths behind her.

"This is the end of the territory. Rouges live over there and I'm the only rouge I think either of us feel like dealing with right now," Darkpaw explained.

"You aren't a rouge," Windlegs protested.

"You convince the rest of the clan of that and then we'll see," Darkpaw said.

"How'd you know rouges live over there anyway? This is pretty far out in the territory for an apprentice to go," Windlegs said deciding to change the subject.

Darkpaw shrugged. "Everyone knows that. And besides I like to hunt here."

"Oh so is this how you get so much prey?" Windlegs laughed.

"No, I'm just talented. Wait here," Darkpaw said and took off into the brush. He had noticed another scent in the air and knew instantly who it was. He ran to the edge of the bushes just before the two-leg nest and poked his head out, hoping Windlegs hadn't noticed it. He saw a black tail about to disappear into the forest. "T.J.!" he hissed.

The black tom immediately pulled back out and looked around to find the source of the voice. He spotted Darkpaw and ran over. "Darkpaw, it's good to see you!" he exclaimed.

"Sure, what are you doing?" Darkpaw asked trying to make sure Windlegs wasn't following him.

"I need to talk to you."

"Well I can't talk right now. I'm not alone. Another of my clan is out here with me."

"But it's important. It's about your next battle," T.J. protested.

"Don't you understand? If I get caught there won't _be_ another battle for me! If it's so important then meet me here at this time tomorrow," Darkpaw said then shot off before T.J. could protest again. He found and killed a small shrew on his way back to Windlegs and tried to hide his panting when he reached her.

"You were gone that long for _that_?" she asked with a smile in her voice.

"You can't rush perfection," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"Right, ok," Windlegs laughed.

Darkpaw buried the tiny prey before following Windlegs to continue hunting. He did his best to ensure they didn't get any closer to the border.

_

As the sun began to fall, Darkpaw and Windlegs completed their hunt. They quickly collected their prey and made their way back to camp. Darkpaw placed his kill on the pile and chose a bird Windlegs had caught for Runningnose. Tigerstripe immediately ran up and called Windlegs over. She said goodbye to Darkpaw quickly before Tigerstripe urged her away to where Thicketclaw and Speckledthorn were sitting.

Darkpaw walked over to the elder's den rolling his eyes.

"Rough day?" Runningnose asked.

"What's it to you?" Darkpaw asked.

Runningnose didn't have a chance to answer before Mudriver came running up.

"So what were you and Windlegs doing?" the grey tom asked with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

"Nothing, just hunting," Darkpaw said.

"She ask you?"

"No, I asked her."

"Aw, Darkpaw got a girlfriend! I'm tellin' Thundertail!" Mudriver cried and ran off.

"Mudriver, get back here!" Darkpaw shouted and began to follow his mentor.

"Darkpaw I think you still have duties to fulfill," Runningnose said stopping the apprentice in his tracks.

Darkpaw hissed in annoyance as Mudriver caught up to his sister. Knowing there was nothing he could do now, he returned to Runningnose.

_

Windlegs protested as Tigerstripe nearly shoved her into Speckledthorn and Thicketclaw. "What's that all about?" she hissed.

"You know I don't like you around him," Tigerstripe said.

"You can't control me, Tigerstripe," Windlegs growled before turning to her two friends.

Thicketclaw was laying on her back batting at Speckledthorn's whiskers playfully. When Speckledthorn dipped his head to greet Windlegs, Thicketclaw wrapped her front legs around his neck and bit at his ear causing him to hiss in protest.

"Fight back, would ya?!" Thicketclaw said. Her upper body was lifted off the ground slightly as Speckledthorn tried to pull his head out of her grip but failed.

"You're a member of my clan, why should I fight you? You aren't my enemy," Speckledthorn said trying again to free himself gently but having no luck. Thicketclaw just bit his ear again.

"Because you're acting like a wimp. I want you to fight back. Be a ShadowClan," Thicketclaw answered allowing her claws to sink shallowly into Speckledthorn's neck when he tried to jerk away again.

"Have you tried this?" Windlegs asked. She unsheathed her claws a little and swiped them into Speckledthorn's ribs.

The calico tom yowled and lept into the air, freeing himself finally from the brown female's grip but leaving shallow, stinging scratches in his scruff. He turned to Windlegs and hissed. Both females began bursting into curls of laughter and Tigerstripe smirked.

"Let me try!" Thicketclaw cried and mimicked Windlegs even though Speckledthorn tried to escape.

The fur on Speckledthorn's spine rose and he yowled again. "Stop it!" he demanded.

"Ok, ok, I'm sorry," Thicketclaw said and walked over to Speckledthorn. He eyed her suspiciously but didn't move as she stood next to him. She licked his cheek and she felt him calm down a bit. His tri-colored fur settled down. Suddenly she jabbed him with her claws again and he lept next to Tigerstripe with another hiss. "Sorry, I couldn't help myself," Thicketclaw laughed as he glared at her.

"Come on, Speckledthorn, before they get you all jittery," Tigerstripe said failing in forcing down a smile of amusement.

Speckledthorn nodded and walked next to Tigerstripe with Windlegs and Thicketclaw still laughing as they followed. Unfortunately, he _was_ a little jittery for he could not stop himself from glancing over his shoulder occasionally due to the now induced paranoia the best friends had forced on him.

_

Darkpaw finally caught up to Mudriver and Thundertail but, judging by Thundertail's smirk, Mudriver had already told her.

"There's the lover boy," Thundertail said.

"I'm not with Windlegs!" Darkpaw growled.

"Sure you ain't. Go get some sleep, you got lesson tonight," Mudriver chuckled.

Darkpaw hissed and stalked to the apprentices' den. He passed in front of Tigerstripe and the others but consciously kept himself from looking at them. He did, however, sense a twin pair of blue eyes on him as he passed by.

_

Windlegs twitched slightly in her sleep, worry lining her face. Her limbs shivered and jerked but did not disturb her brother sleeping beside her. A faint mewl rose in her throat signaling her mental distress as her dream carried her away.

"_Help! Help me, please somebody help!" a small kit cried. It was dangling off the edge of a cliff about to fall into a dark abyss below. The clan was standing in a half circle around it, just watching. "Please help me!" it begged._

_Windlegs forced herself through the crowd to get a better view. It's pleading eyes locked on her and she ran forward to help it. But she was held back by numerous claws. She looked behind her to see the other cats holding her back. Tigerstripe was in front of the others, his grip on her back bordering viciousness and his expression was hard-set and determined as was the case with the others. They were not going to let her go to the kit._

"_Let me go!" she yelled._

"_HELP!" the kit screamed again. Black shadows were rising up out of the abyss now, snatching and grabbing at the kit's fur with long, shining claws. It screamed but held on for dear life._

"_Let go!" Windlegs yelled again. _

_The kit's grip was coming loose and finally it fell into the darkness with a sickening shriek. Shadows shot up from the edge of the cliff and took the shape of demonic cats. Their fur was wild and moved like fire. Their eyes and claws were red. They growled and it sounded like roaring flames. They bared their teeth at the forest cats but did not advance. _

_The clan cats backed up in fear and released Windlegs finally but she no longer wanted to rush forward. _

_The shadow cats suddenly turned back to the cliff as a huge beam of black light shot into the sky. Suddenly an enormous cat appeared, black with a body like flame like the rest. He dwarfed the others nearly tenfold and they shrank back not in fear, but respect._

_Then, the new cat began to change. His eyes turned ice blue and long silver stripes raked across his fur. He laughed, high pitched with a shadow of innocence that had been stripped away._

"Darkpaw," Windlegs whispered…

**So, months ago my computer got a really bad virus and crashed. It took forever to get it working again and when we got it back, all my files were deleted including this chapter! So, now paranoid, I didn't want to write anything until I got a flash drive. Finally got that but wanted to re-read the story to make sure I didn't mess up or anything, but then school got hectic and I didn't have time to write and I finally got time and…yeah. Ok so there's my story and hopefully there won't be such a long wait for the next chapter. Thank you for your patience.**

**So, who thinks they can interpret Windlegs's dream? Let me know what you think. Please review because reviews make Darkpaw happy and remind me that there are actual people who are reading and waiting for updates on this story.**


	21. Chapter 20

Windlegs sat outside the warriors' den staring up at the stars. The slightly smaller moon still lit up her fur and made her seem to light the ground around her. The stars reflected in her soft blue eyes. It was cold, but she felt somehow distant from it. She gazed at the stars without seeing them. Her dream had forced her awake and she found if she closed her eyes she would see the kit again, screaming as he fell into the abyss to return a monster. But even now, as she held her eyes wide, she could see him, begging, pleading for her to save him from his fate. But she hadn't, and she hadn't gone to him when he came back either. She tried to justify the act by telling herself it was because he was already gone, but beneath the weak covering, the truth tried to shine through despite her attempts to snuff it out.

"What are you doing awake so late?"

Windlegs nearly sprang out of her fur as a voice spoke beside her. She looked down to discover ice staring back at her, unfazed by her reaction. "Darkpaw, you nearly gave me a heart attack!" she hissed so as not to wake the sleeping warriors. "What are you even doing awake?"

"I have training tonight. Mudriver should be coming to wake me any minute to take me out, but I couldn't sleep," the tabby explained, his gaze never left hers.

Windlegs was forced to turn away. She could not hold the look any longer. Those eyes, so dark and cold, just like the monster in her dream. But Darkpaw wasn't that monster, he couldn't be. He was different, maybe, but not monstrous like the others said. Still, she couldn't bear those eyes, not when they glowed so unnaturally, even for a cat, in the dark, their shade never once changing but to become more brilliant and harsh. "I know what you mean," Windlegs sighed.

"What kept you awake?" Darkpaw asked, unbothered by her turning from him. It was a thing he was used to.

Windlegs glanced at him, but seeing only the falling kit, looked back at the sky. "Bad dream," she said. 'Nice way of putting it,' she thought to herself as the kit's scream rang through her ears again.

"Yeah?" Darkpaw asked, his gaze finally leaving her to join the stars. "I know what you mean."

Windlegs turned to him and opened her mouth to ask him what he dreamt about, but she decided she would rather not know and again stared at the moon.

"We have a lot in common, then, I suppose," Darkpaw said.

"No. We don't really."

Darkpaw looked up at Windlegs, confusion sketched across his face.

"We have very little in common. I might hardly know a thing about you, but I know that much. You've been here a little over six moons now, only recently have I actually carried on a successful conversation with you, and you reveal nothing about yourself if you can help it. And you help it very well. All I know is that you're alone and were…well I've never been alone, I have no idea what its like," Windlegs said. She did not want to admit just how much she knew about his time with Snaketail.

Darkpaw caught the pause and change in her speech, but he said nothing about it. After a pause, he asked her a question she had not expected. "Do you want to know what it's like? To be alone?"

"What?" Windlegs asked.

"I'm fairly certain you heard me. I can show you what it's like to be alone, sort of. Do you want to know?" he repeated.

Windlegs thought about it. She didn't know what Darkpaw might do. She knew being alone must hurt, but if Darkpaw hurt her…the moment that thought crossed her mind, her doubts vanished. Darkpaw would not hurt her. She didn't know how she knew it, but she did. "Show me."

"Follow me."

"But Mudriver…"

"Will still be here when we get back."

"Are you sure?"

"Are you?"

With that, Windlegs followed him to the camp exit and into the dark forest. Darkpaw wound his way expertly through the brush. His night classes had obviously gone well. He seemed to know every stone and plant on the trail and made it easy for Windlegs to follow. The tall grass hid the moon and the scattered pines whispered things Windlegs could not understand. She had very rarely been out of the camp at night alone before, but she wondered how many times Darkpaw had for him to know it so well.

Darkpaw stopped under a tree with a large hollow under the roots. Windlegs didn't know how far from camp they were, but it was defiantly not near.

"Go in."

"What?" The idea seemed preposterous. Why would she do such a thing? But the look in his eyes compelled her to do it. She climbed down into the hollow, followed by him. His body nearly blocked out the light but she could see his outline as he herded her closer to the back. Finally, her back hit the end of the hollow. "Darkpaw what are you doing?" she asked getting uneasy.

"Trust me. Now more than ever, trust me completely that I will not bring harm to you or do anything to compromise your safety."

"O-ok," she said. But her uneasiness grew as he took her front left paw in his mouth and guided it under a smaller root in the ground.

"Can you pull yourself free?" he asked.

"If I try hard enough I could," she said tugging her paw a few times and finding it stuck. Darkpaw then took a thin root from behind her and pulled it over her head and allowed it to rest against her chest. Once he let it go, it snapped against her chest, holding her in place.

"Could you get out of that if you needed to?"

"Well maybe if I had time to think or plan, but Darkpaw what's the point of this? I don't like it."

"Then I'll let you go if you truly want to be."

"I do." Windlegs didn't like this trapped feeling at all. She wanted out.

"Do you trust me?"

"Yes."

"Completely?"

"Yes."

"Do you realize that you'd be nearly helpless if I left you here?"

"Yes."

"Good." Darkpaw turned and walked out of the hollow, leaving Windlegs in her predicament.

"Darkpaw? Darkpaw, what are you doing?!" she shouted, but he didn't turn back. She struggled to pull herself free to follow, but she couldn't. "Darkpaw!" He did not answer and disappeared from view outside. She struggled again but it was in vain. She felt betrayed, confused, uncomfortable, panicked, and, as the silence grew around her, completely alone. "Darkpaw! Don't leave me here!" she cried, but again there came no answer. She became angry, struggling more violently, determined to get Darkpaw for doing this. How could he have betrayed her? Left her helpless like that? But fear began to creep up in her too. What if she couldn't get out? What if something dangerous came along and attacked her? She was alone and helpless like this! She had overestimated her ability to pull herself free and her fear and anger rose along with her confusion. Why would Darkpaw do such a thing?

What felt like hours later, but was actually only a few minutes, a dark figure appeared in the hollow entrance. She saw only an outline, but when the scent reached her nose, she calmed. Darkpaw approached calmly and pulled the root off of her and released her paw.

"What was that about?" she snapped.

"Were you frightened?"

"A little."

"Confused?"

"Yeah."

"Angry?"

"Yes!"

"Did you feel abandoned? Betrayed?"

"Yes!"

"Magnify it tenfold, maybe more. That's what it's like to be alone without knowing why."

Windlegs felt a pit form in her stomach and all her energy seeped into it. "Oh…"

"Feel drained?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Magnify that. Now you know how I feel every day. But do you know the difference?"

"What?"

Darkpaw approached her so he could whisper in her ear. "No one's coming to untie me." Darkpaw turned back in the direction of camp and walked off.

After allowing his words to sink in, she followed, the hole in her stomach becoming deeper. She found herself now longing for sleep no matter what it brought. Darkpaw felt like this every hour of every day and every night for every moon he had been here. How had he survived?

Just before they re-entered the camp, Windlegs got up the courage to speak the question that had been burning in her the entire way. "Darkpaw, hold on."

"What?" The icy eyes turned to her, intimidating and calm.

"Is that…is that really how it feels to be you?"

"No."

Windlegs gave him a look of confusion.

"It hurts a lot more." Darkpaw turned back and walked into the camp.

"Darkpaw! There you are! I've been looking for you, where have you been? I told you that you have training tonight." Mudriver had rarely looked so pissed at Darkpaw and at the same time relieved to see him.

"I was doing something," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"Yeah well you have responsibilities to…oh hi, Windlegs." Mudriver was now looking past his apprentice to the white she-cat that had just entered the camp. "Whatcha doing out n about at this hour?"

"I was talking to Darkpaw. I saw he couldn't sleep and thought I might talk him into taking a walk with me. Sorry, I guess I lost track of time," Windlegs said.

"Oh, well it's ok I guess, I mean it hasn't been too long. C'mon, Darkpaw," the grey tom said.

Darkpaw nodded and followed his mentor out of the camp again. He glanced back at Windlegs but she was already going into the warriors' den.

"So what were you doing with Windlegs?" Mudriver asked.

"Talking, didn't she just tell you that?"

"What were you talking about?"

"Stuff."

"What kinda stuff?"

"Are we going to get to training or should I sit down in a brightly lit area so you can interrogate me some more?"

"You find a brightly lit spot in the territory and I'll interrogate you. Till then, get ready to run."

Preferring the latter even if he could succeed in the challenge given enough time, Darkpaw fell into step a few paces behind his mentor's bushy tail as Mudriver had already taken off sprinting. Despite how thick his fur made his body look, he was a fast runner. Not as fast as Thundertail, which was revealed every time a gathering came around and Thundertail would need to chase him down for a grooming, but he was fast. Darkpaw slowly gained on the fleeing tail until he practically swiped at it with each step. He sped up until he was at Mudriver's side just behind the older tom's shoulder. He needed to be careful, however, that he didn't get a face-full of silky fur.

"Don't wear yourself out racing me, kit, we'll be out here for a while," Mudriver warned.

"Don't waste your breath lecturing me." With a cocky grin, Darkpaw passed up his mentor. Suddenly, with a shriek he was sure to deny later, he tripped and rolled several tail lengths through rocks and tall grass. He struggled to untangle his limbs from the bush he had landed in, wondering what the hell just happened.

"I'd lecture you again, but you seem a little tied up right now," Mudriver said walking up with a smirk.

"What happened?" Darkpaw asked yanking himself free and pulling thorns from his thankfully thick fur.

"You were so caught up in your own pride, you forgot about the terrain and the fact someone was behind you. It made you easy to trip up. Just imagine if you hadn't had the luxury of knowing I was there. I could have been an enemy and the clan would find your stripy ass dead in the morning," Mudriver said, his speech taking on the more official tone he used when Darkpaw had a lesson to learn.

"I didn't realize we were doing that. I thought-"

"No you didn't think. If you'd thought, you'd have never let your guard down," Mudriver said cutting Darkpaw off.

"It won't happen again."

"Bet it does."

"Will not!" Darkpaw protested.

"We'll be running all night and whether I do that again or not is left for you to wonder. Stay in front of me." The last bit sounded like a warning, a warning Darkpaw wasn't going to ignore.

After over two hours of their running, Darkpaw had been tripped again eight times. Once he had gotten his footing again, but that had been dumb luck that, when he tried to recreate it, resulted in him tripping himself right into briars.

"Mudriver, I don't know how to avoid those swipes but to outrun them and that's getting increasingly difficult," Darkpaw panted, pulling himself out of a mud puddle.

"Do you want me to tell you how?"

"Yes." Darkpaw shook drops of mud from his fur. It was freezing and he instinctively pressed against Mudriver for warmth.

"Well I'm not going to. I want you to experiment and try to figure it out," Mudriver said, licking a few of the bigger drops of dirty water from his apprentice's coat. "Dry yourself off, and we'll continue."

"For how long?" Darkpaw didn't want to whine, but he wasn't enjoying this at all. He was tired and, more recently, wet and cold. He wished he had put in more of an effort to sleep when he'd had the chance. He quickly worked to dry his ribcage first, then his legs.

"Until I say we can stop. Plus, you were late, so you've got work to make up."

Darkpaw groaned as he managed to dry his fur and regain some warmth from Mudriver before Mudriver sent him scurrying along again.

As time went on, Darkpaw found exhaustion making it harder and harder for him to think and Mudriver's tricks grew steadily closer together. As the moon crossed overhead then to the other side of the sky, however, something changed. Darkpaw's legs stopped feeling tired, his eyes widened, and his breathing became steadier. He could hear and feel his heart pounding in his chest and Mudriver's fast paces behind him. He focused on the noise behind him, and recognized a change in them. He suddenly ducked to the side and Mudriver crashed to the ground in a heap of long grey fur. Darkpaw jumped back onto the path they had been taking to see his mentor standing back up and grinning back at him.

"Nice," Mudriver praised, "Lost my own focus there for a while. Didn't think you'd ever pull it off. But figuring out how to dodge it is only part one of three."

"What are the others?" Darkpaw asked. He felt full of energy now. His legs trembled as he tried to hold them still. He _wanted_ to run now.

"Be able to dodge it when your opponent doesn't loose their footing, and learn how to counter or block it," Mudriver said.

"Great, let's go!" Darkpaw said.

"Careful, kit, you'll burst your little heart. You're body's running on reserve energy, pure adrenaline is keeping you from falling over right now."

"I like this feeling!" Darkpaw cried jumping into the air and batting at nothing.

"Don't burn up all your energy, you have to be awake enough to train again tomorrow and hunt," Mudriver said.

"I'll be ok. Come on, Mudriver, I have more stuff to figure out! You said it yourself," Darkpaw pleaded.

"Run," Mudriver ordered and Darkpaw shot off, Mudriver right behind him.

Darkpaw kept sprinting for a while, paying attention to the almost silent footfalls of the older tom, but Mudriver didn't do anything. Darkpaw kept running, slowly loosing momentum as his energy reserves protested his long-distance sprint. Just as he thought Mudriver had lost interest in him, he heard the same change in step. He ducked to the side again, but Mudriver hooked his hind leg and sent him spinning to the dirt.

"You reacted too quickly. Don't give your enemy time to change their mind. Be patient, make sure they have only one choice so you can go against it with no troubles," Mudriver scolded.

Darkpaw nodded, his head suddenly felt heavy along with his eyelids. He told himself to get to his paws, but his body had other ideas. The fall to the frozen, hard-packed earth had hurt and catching his breath was simply not happening.

"You burned yourself out, didn't you?" Mudriver sighed.

Darkpaw nodded again. His chin hurt when it collided with the ground.

"Get up, your limbs will start to hurt if you stay down there," Mudriver said.

Darkpaw groaned, but didn't do as he was told. He wasn't sure he'd ever be able to walk again.

"Darkpaw! After that work out, your muscles won't want to suddenly quit. They'll cramp up and I'm not carrying you back to camp," Mudriver hissed.

Darkpaw wanted to move, he really did, but the ground was suddenly so inviting. He just wanted to sleep. The sun was beginning to peak over the horizon. His breath came back, but his chest tightened and pain flooded into it. His legs felt like they were being crushed. He opened his mouth and eyes wide, letting out a small cry.

Mudriver grabbed the tabby's scruff and yanked him to his paws and forced him to begin walking. "I told you!" he scolded.

Darkpaw didn't say anything as he limped along, pain stabbing at his limbs. Walking was more difficult than it should have been and he knew he wouldn't be able to run. He just wished he hadn't crashed and burned so far from camp.

"That's what you get for being an idiot. Now go to sleep," Mudriver said when they got back to camp, nudging his apprentice in the direction of the den.

Darkpaw didn't feel like arguing and did as he was told with no question or complaint. As he collapsed into his nest, he could feel his legs throbbing in time with his heartbeat. He groaned and rolled over, falling asleep without regrets.

_

Darkpaw awoke to discover he was looking down a dark tunnel to a bright light. When his eyes adjusted he realized he was looking out into the camp and it must be midday by now. He struggled to get up but his muscles had their own ideas. A few minutes later, Mudriver poked his head into the den.

"Good you're awake. Come with me," Mudriver said.

Darkpaw again tried to force his paws under him and, after great effort, succeeded in limping out to his mentor. Mudriver led his apprentice to Littlecloud's den and said medicine cat seemed to have been expecting them.

"Rough night?" Littlecloud asked noting Darkpaw's haggard exterior.

Darkpaw grunted a response and Littlecloud laughed.

"Come over here, I'll see what I can do about that."

Darkpaw did as he was told, laying on a very soft mat of moss Littlecloud must have laid down earlier. Littlecloud gently rolled him onto his right side and began gently rubbing his front paws along Darkpaw's sore legs and shoulders. Darkpaw was nearly asleep again when Littlecloud had him roll onto his other side to repeat the process to his other legs. Afterwards, Littlecloud told him to eat a few herbs that Darkpaw had little interest in knowing the name of and he soon fell asleep again.

When Darkpaw woke up again, he felt a thousand times better. His muscles no longer ached and he felt wide awake.

"You can go now, if you're up to it," Littlecloud said from the other side of the den though it hadn't appeared he had been looking at Darkpaw.

"Thanks, Littlecloud," Darkpaw said. He stretched and padded out of the den.

"Don't work too hard for a couple of days," Littlecloud called after him.

Darkpaw only half-heard him. He was busy looking at one of the warriors. They didn't look well and were coughing. Darkpaw closed his eyes and sniffed. In the cat's chest region up to their nose, something was off in the coloring of their life signature. It gave a glowing whitish hue to that part of their body. They were ill, but he didn't know what it was.

Littlecloud must have heard the coughing because he was suddenly out of his den and walking towards the coughing warrior. They exchanged a few words before Littlecloud ushered the she-cat into his den.

Darkpaw was confused, but he did not want to go near the infected cat to ask Littlecloud about it. Deciding to just hunt and ask Runningnose about it later, he walked out of the camp.

Something began nagging at him as he walked through the cool shade of grass and trees. As he tried to focus on it, T.J. suddenly came to his mind and he remembered his plan to meet with the tom today. He looked up at the sky and realized the sun would be setting soon.

"Shit!" he shouted and took off running to the edge of the territory, forgetting Littlecloud's warning to not over-work himself.

Of course T.J. wasn't there when he reached the two-leg nest, but he had an idea of where to look for him. Unfortunately, his first thought to look in the shed proved wrong. Darkpaw followed his second guess and went into the section of forest that held the fights. Sure enough, he saw the family of four carrying sticks that had been lit on fire to the different circles of rocks to light the kindling there and clearing out the circle, scratching away the blood-soaked sand.

"T.J.!" Darkpaw called and the young black tom looked up.

"Darkpaw! There you are!" T.J. said running up the slope to the tabby.

"I'm sorry I was late. I got…caught up," Darkpaw said, "What did you need to talk to me about?"

"Oh, come with me, I'll tell you. Mother I'll be back," T.J. called. Lynn nodded and T.J. brought Darkpaw back to the shed. "Well as I'm sure you remember, you lost your fight with Magi."

Darkpaw nodded grudgingly at the reminder. "So?"

"So, you agreed to become an apprentice. That means you take the punishments like any other apprentice would for loosing a fight. Do you remember when Ginger lost?"

"Yes. So I need to fight a dog?"

"No. Well, not necessarily. You can choose to face a dog, do a rematch to the death with the cat you lost against, or try your luck in The Run." T.J.'s voice had taken on a grave tone as he spoke.

Darkpaw was getting really sick of running. "So I could do what Ginger did, try to kill Magi or get killed myself, or…what's 'The Run'?"

"My personal favorite. Every apprentice or waiting apprentice, meaning Ginger, Crys, Tears, and Dusk, and an equal number of grown cats of your enemy's, in this case meaning Magi's, choosing will be sent to chase after you into the woods. You must survive one hour. You can kill them if you like but you cannot return to the ring until the hour is up and they will continue coming after you until you reach the center. Also, any cat that wishes to watch may do so and provide help to the 'runners' of your whereabouts," T.J. explained.

Darkpaw thought about this and, while it sounded incredibly exciting, it was possibly the most deadly choice given the odds. Instead of going up against an easily frightened puppy or facing one cat, he would be facing eight cats all intent on killing him with places to hide and stalk up on him with help provided by outside sources. Darkpaw debated each option. "How long to I have to think this over?"

"You must tell Lynn or Shadow your choice the night before," T.J. said, "But I advise you not to be too long, the ringfighters are not patient and may see you as a coward if you don't return quickly. You came on the full moon so you must come back before then."

"By the night before the new moon, I'll have decided," Darkpaw promised.

"Good. Now unless you wish to participate in the fights tonight, you should go," T.J. advised.

Darkpaw nodded and left the shed, going back into the forest. He knew he defiantly shouldn't run again, but he needed to move quickly so that he could hunt and take care of Runningnose before the sun set. He hunted like mad until he had a few good pieces of prey and made his way quickly but carefully back to camp.

"Looks like it's finally begun," Runningnose said as Darkpaw began working to clean the elders' den.

"What's begun?" he asked, arranging some new bedding.

"Cats have begun getting sick. White cough has started up. Soon there'll be green cough. You be careful, ok?" Runningnose said.

"What's white cough?" Darkpaw asked remembering the strange signature he had seen earlier.

"Just a mild infection cats get as it starts getting colder. Green cough is the killer though."

"Oh," Darkpaw said, glad he hadn't gone near the sick warrior.

"You're young and strong though, you should be fine and Littlecloud is smart, he'll get you through it if you do get sick. It's lucky we now know a very good treatment for green cough that Littlecloud got from ThunderClan." Runningnose suddenly seemed like he was looking very far away and a small smile crept onto his face.

"He got it from ThunderClan?" Darkpaw asked.

"He snuck over the border to ask for help after part of ShadowClan was getting wiped out due to the severity of it. Thankfully he was given help and saved the clan," Runningnose explained. He didn't see the entire point of going into great detail when Darkpaw wouldn't know any of the other cats that played a part.

"But if you get sick, what would happen to you?"

"I'm so old by now, I'd probably die. But it's alright, I'm not doing much now anyway," Runningnose laughed.

Darkpaw admired how calm the elder was about the idea of his death. Darkpaw didn't want to die, he was unsure of where exactly he would go. If StarClan were anything like ShadowClan, he'd be in the shadow forest for sure.

_

For three days after his all night run, Darkpaw was not permitted by Mudriver to do any sort of physical training. However, the tom did not allow his apprentice to go without training. They spent the nights working on Darkpaw's mental strengths.

"You have to be able to keep your head no matter what. If you loose it in a battle or during a chase, you'll be killed. Never stop thinking," Mudriver had told him several times.

Darkpaw would close his eyes and, without using his gift, need to pinpoint where Mudriver was and what sort of attack he would be launching and tell how he would counter it. Mudriver would run him through all sorts of scenarios that Darkpaw would need to figure out the best course of action to take to get out of it and win.

"If you sense three enemy cats surrounding you, what would you do?" Mudriver asked.

"I'd continue walking, trying to ensure I was near enough to camp to call for help if I needed to but far enough to not lead them in," Darkpaw said.

"Do you let them know you're onto them?"

"No, I wait for them to make the first move but never stop paying attention to where they are at all times."

"And?"

"And I listen in case anymore enemies join them."

"If you know you will be badly outnumbered no matter what you do, then what?"

"Take off running in the direction of, but not directly to, camp sounding an alarm."

"And if they attack you and try to silence you?"

"Never quit fighting even if it ends in my death but do not, under any circumstances, lead them into camp or try to make a deal."

"Good. Now, if you find them first?"

"If it is more than I can handle I should follow them for a short way to see if I can understand their motives. I must always keep aware to ensure I am not seen. Then, go back to camp as quickly as possible and alert Blackstar or Russetfur."

"If they do see you?"

"Don't panic. Remain confident. This is _ShadowClan _territory and they possess no rights to do anything on it."

"If they ask you to escort them to camp?"

"Check if there is a medicine cat with them. If there is, lead them cautiously to camp without using a direct route. If there is not, lead them back to their territory or sound an alarm. Never forget that they are enemy invaders."

Darkpaw was much better with these scenarios than he had been when they had started. Previously his answer to all of them had been to jump in and kill as many as possible. No doubt, Darkpaw's strength was in talking through a one-on-one or two-on-two fight, not handling enemy parties coming into the territory.

After Darkpaw had been approved to run again, the running training began again. Darkpaw never again made the mistake of over-running himself and slowly became better and better at keeping his footing until he could turn the situation to his advantage. He then had to learn how to trip Mudriver, a task that was much harder to do. Mudriver was larger and harder to stumble, and when he did fall, he fell in a controlled manner Darkpaw had not yet duplicated and sprang back to his paws ready to fight in less than a heartbeat. They practiced alternately day and night to ensure Darkpaw could handle both and Darkpaw even tried it using his gift.

_

As does everything else, two weeks passed and Darkpaw's time to state his decision came. He padded through the darkness, only the smallest sliver of a moon in the sky to guide him. He walked proudly through the bushes and found T.J. waiting for him.

"You have decided then?"

"Yes."

T.J. led him to the crowded clearing and brought him to Lynn. The sounds of the fight currently going on rang through Darkpaw's ears.

"I've made my choice," Darkpaw said confidently.

"What is it?" Lynn asked her interest sincere.

"The Run."…

**Ok, sorry I took a while updating again but I was busy. So thanks for reading and you all know I love your attention via reviews and they make Darkpaw happy!**


	22. Chapter 21

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Ghost- dark tortoiseshell she-cat with black eyes.**

**Sunny- gold she-cat with white paws. Mother of Worth. Ringfighter/former kittypet.**

**Cara- vicious silver she-cat with a black blaze and green eyes. Daughter of Frost. From BloodClan. (mentioned but not seen)**

**Draco- mysterious wise old tom (mentioned but not seen)**

**Taka- mysterious wise old she-cat (mentioned but not seen)**

"_The Run."_

"I thought you might choose that, daring devil that you are," Lynn responded with pride in her eyes. "Tomorrow night, come as early as you can. T.J. will meet you and take you to the tree to await your event. This should be fun."

"I look forward to it."

That conversation had taken place the previous night, a little less than twenty-four hours from the present time. Darkpaw was being careful not to travel too quickly. He knew he would need to save all his energy for an hour of running after hanging from a tree for any amount of time.

He met T.J. at the edge of the clearing and the older tom led him down the faintly familiar path to where he had seen Ginger being punished. T.J. took him up just as high and helped him get his grip before leaving him there.

It wasn't so hard at first, but that quickly changed. Darkpaw's legs and claws were not designed to take this sort of stress, especially for a long length of time. He wasn't sure how much time was passing, but his muscles were quickly becoming unbearably sore. He wanted nothing more than to retract his claws, but doing so would make him plummet, likely, to his death. He held on, but he felt as though his claws were being torn out.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, T.J. and J.T. appeared. They climbed up into the tree and lifted Darkpaw up as they had done with Ginger. But with them were Tears and Crys. Darkpaw figured this was another bit of the ringfighter society, to bring apprentices to witness such events.

"…and good news, my friends, Worth has returned to us. The illness spared her life and she is ready to prove that it has left her no worse for wear," Lynn was saying.

Darkpaw looked up and could see the smaller white she-cat sitting in the ring with Ginger, Dusk, Magi, Shadow, and Lynn. Darkpaw followed his escorts to the side of the cages he had never been on before. T.J. and J.T. stopped him at the edge, but Tears and Crys went in to join the others.

"It's good to see Worth was able to return for this event. I was sure she would be dead when I saw her," T.J. said.

Darkpaw looked up at T.J. then back at the golden-faced she-cat. Happy wasn't exactly the word that came to his mind when he saw her. If there was to be an equal number of fighters and apprentices, this meant two more cats would be following him into the forest tonight than he had at first thought.

Magi named off the five cats she had chosen to accompany the apprentices. Kuma, Rook, Frost, Honeydew, and she-cat Darkpaw did not recognize named Ghost. The name fit in Darkpaw's opinion. He didn't even see her until she was pointed to. She was probably a tortoiseshell, but it looked more like someone had flecked a black coat with specks of white and silver. Her eyes were so dark that Darkpaw had trouble seeing them until the light from the fire caught them and he was startled to discover she had been staring at him the entire time.

T.J. and J.T. escorted Darkpaw into the ring to face the ten cats that would be intent on ending his life tonight.

"Runners, this is your target. You all know your task. Do not let him return here alive."

Darkpaw felt his confidence drain away as Lynn said those words. The runners all looked down at him as if he was a mouse and they were starving. Even his hatred for Frost and Honeydew could not overpower the feeling of dread he was nearly sick with now. But then, his wonderful ego returned and began shouting in his mental ear: 'Do not let _them _exit the forest alive!' J.T.'s voice sounded in his head: 'If the time ever comes that you must face Rook, know that if you do not kill her, she can and will kill you without hesitation even if you are just a kit.' Darkpaw was not in the mood to disappoint tonight.

"At the end of the hour, I will sound an alarm. Darkpaw will still be fair game until he returns to me. Are you all ready?" Lynn said.

All the runners and the tabby kit nodded.

"Darkpaw, go to the edge of the ring."

Darkpaw did as he was told and the crowd before him immediately parted. His heart raced as he felt the aggression of the cats behind him crashing into him in waves. He knew he would need to use everything he had learned recently from Mudriver about running from enemies as well as stealth and, above all, he needed his gift this time.

"Go!" Lynn shouted.

Darkpaw didn't hesitate. He was in the trees before the word had fully registered in his mind and the runners were already right behind him. "Dear StarClan, what have I done?"

_

Not long after he entered the forest, Darkpaw tripped. None of the cats had caught up to him yet, but it turned out the area for the ring was higher up than the forest around it. Darkpaw had never noticed it since he had never been into this part of the forest before.

The stumble threw him into some bushes, beyond which were the densest trees Darkpaw had ever seen. There was no grass and very few bushes now. It was likely that light almost never hit here. It was like the cousin to ShadowClan. Darkpaw had no time to marvel at this, however. The runners were crashing through behind him and he had to get out of there fast. He struggled to force his eyes to adjust to the absence of light, but he finally had to give up and closed his eyes. The forest spilled before him with brightly glowing trees, but no prey. Behind him it seemed the entire ring was following after the runners. Darkpaw quickly ran ahead, searching for a hiding place.

_

Frost stopped the band of runners at the line of bushes Darkpaw had fallen through. He found the break in foliage where the kit had crashed through and smirked. "Tears, Crys, you two go through there. The rest of us are going to go around," the silver tom said.

"Like hell I am!" Kuma said and backed up a few paces before performing a running jump over the line of bushes.

Rook hadn't even stopped and was already out of sight.

Frost rolled his eyes. "Ginger, you go with him. Dusk, you and Worth come with me and Honeydew and…" Frost looked around in confusion. He had been certain Ghost had been with them. The elusive she-cat must have gone off without them. There was no time to worry about her as they took off looking for a break in the bushes. They found it quickly and were through in a heartbeat.

"Let's split up," Honeydew suggested.

"Fine. Dusk come with me," Frost said. The little tom easily obliged and the two pairs went their separate ways.

_

Darkpaw was nearly frantic. He sensed three cats behind him and the smell of other ringfighters were all around him. Apparently many cats used this route to go to the fights. He saw flashes of other cats in the corners of his eyes, but it didn't seem anyone had pinpointed him yet.

Darkpaw looked at the trees around him. They were too tall for him to even attempt to climb to even the first branch. Thankfully, however, his first idea of the night hit him. He chose one of the shorter trees and raced up it as high as he could before jumping off, trying to land as far from the tree as possible. If they followed his scent, that should hold them off for a while.

Satisfied with the trick but knowing it wouldn't last long, Darkpaw raced on in a different direction. He finally had to open his eyes. The scents of cats around him were so strong they were messing with his gift and it was proving too much trouble to try to decipher everything.

He stopped, listening. He couldn't hear any other cats, but that meant little. He tried to get a sense of if anyone was around him, but it provided nothing. What did help was when his followers showed themselves.

"Well look what we have here, Worth. A pretty little tom-kit," Honeydew said stepping out of the bushes with Worth in tow.

"What should we do with him?" Worth asked, a horrific smile spreading across her golden face.

"We could call the others, but then where's the sport in that?" Honeydew smiled in very the same way as the she-kit next to her.

"Guess there wouldn't be much of one. But where's the sport of you both taking me on at the same time?" Darkpaw said, "You'll defiantly be wanting back-up." Darkpaw smirked.

"Oh, someone's feisty. Are you sure you can…WORTH!"

The white apprentice had rushed Darkpaw and Darkpaw already showed a clear advantage.

"You really shoulda taken some more R&R after your sickness, Worth. You're a little rusty," Darkpaw said before twisting his body to grab the she-cat's scruff in his mouth and slammed her head into a tree with a loud crack. Worth crashed to the ground, completely limp.

"Well, seems you do have some fangs in you, kitten," Honeydew said seeming unmoved by the display. "You know, Frost was so sure he'd seen you before, but he hasn't figured it out yet. I think I might have it though. You're Darky and Reaper's kit, aren't you? I knew she didn't kill you. I'm surprised to see you alive, though. I was sure the forest cats would have you flayed just as quickly as we would."

"Yeah, some of them are still working on it. Guess they can't bring themselves to hurt me yet. I mean, look at my sweet face," Darkpaw said faking a charming smile with surprising ease.

"Bet you have a killer personality, too," Honeydew said sarcastically.

"You could say that. So you knew my daddy then?"

"You could say that. Bit of a prick when he wasn't being that Tigerstar guy's bitch. Thing was, though, Tigerstar had a reason behind what he did. He wanted something better. Darkstripe, I think he just did it. I don't think he felt a thing. Emotionally I mean. He didn't care what he had to do. He always just did it and didn't care. Had that weird look in his eyes, kinda like you, but it was emptier. He was a psycho," Honeydew said.

"Emptier than mine? Gosh, now I _really _wish I coulda seen that. I wasn't sure it was possible. Now, when you call him a psycho, isn't that what you are?" Darkpaw said.

"No, kit, I'm a sadist. Your father was psychopathic. No conscience. No care for right and wrong. Nothing. Just loyalty to Tigerstar and then nothing else. He didn't even love your mother. I don't know what those two had, but love never played a part."

"Interesting. So is this your plan then? Talk me to death?" Darkpaw asked with a yawn.

"No, I just thought you might have an interest as to why you are the little demon you are. Thought you might want to know why you were a mistake," Honeydew said calmly.

Darkpaw looked back at her, eyes flashing. "What?"

"Come on, kit, don't tell me you're in denial. I've seen you fight. You live for the kill. You're just like your dad, but with a bit of mommy dearest thrown in. I'm glad you aren't dead. You're the prettiest little monster I've ever seen."

Darkpaw's claws flexed. "I'm _not_ a monster, and I'm _not _a mistake!"

"Sure you are, kitten. Look at yourself. You know it. Your mommy knew it, too," Honeydew's voice was taking on a different tone. Where it had once been soft and quiet, it was becoming gravelly and harsh. "She knew you were going to be a monster, that's why she got rid of you. She didn't want to have to see the monster she had brought into the world. She didn't want to see all the cats you'd slaughter if you somehow survived. That's why she got rid of you." Honeydew began to approach him slowly. "Sure she could stand you for a little while, but eventually she just couldn't take your horrific cries anymore. She couldn't stand the visions of the demon you'd become. Of all the pain you would cause. She wanted it to end, but she still couldn't bring herself to kill her only little kitten, so she decided to take you to the forest and have them do her dirty work for her. When she came back, she was so distraught over what she had done. She could still hear your annoying little cries ringing in her mind and it was driving her mad. She begged Frost, Slash, and me to end it. We tried to talk her out of it, but she said she couldn't stand it. 'Get the little devil out of my mind. Don't make me have to suffer through memories of him anymore,' she said, 'He's a disease. He's a monster. He's a…'" Honeydew leaned in close so she was nearly nose-to-nose with Darkpaw, "'mistake!'."

"LIAR!" Darkpaw screamed and raked his claws into Honeydew's flesh. She just barely managed to back up enough so he missed a kill shot and instead ripped open her chest. The she-cat howled in anger and pain as she staggered back and Darkpaw took off into the trees once more.

_

Ginger growled in frustration. She had been tailing Kuma, but had tripped and by the time she got back up, he was gone. Suddenly, she heard a loud screech and ran to it. She found Honeydew bleeding heavily and Worth was unconscious next to a tree, blood staining her gold mask.

"Honeydew, are you alright?" Ginger asked.

"I'm fine," the all gold she-cat growled.

Ginger looked over at Worth and began to take a few steps towards her.

"Leave her," Honeydew ordered, "We have to catch that damn runt."

Ginger nodded and went back to Honeydew's side without a second glance at the other apprentice.

The eldest she-cat seemed to completely forget about her still-bleeding injury and led Ginger in the direction Darkpaw had taken off in.

_

Darkpaw kept running, trying to force Honeydew's words from his head, but he couldn't. Her voice stuck in his ears like tree sap. His mind kept replaying her speech over and over. He should have acted quicker. He shouldn't have let her talk for so long. But there was nothing he could do now. He knew she would be on his tail soon. He had to find a way to lose her.

"FROST! HONEYDEW! I SEE HIM!" Darkpaw heard a voice screech from the trees.

"Shit!" he mumbled and turned to find the offending voice. He nearly caught up with the cat he was sure was the cause of the noise, but the black and white tom sprinted out of his grasp with a laugh.

"Ah, ah, ah, kit. It's not me you should be worried about," Slash called with laughter still fresh in his voice. He disappeared before Darkpaw could try to catch him again.

Darkpaw cursed under his breath but knew a lost cause when he saw one. What he had to do now was get them off his tail as much as possible. He sniffed for a moment before he smelled mud, meaning water, meaning something to douse his scent in. He took off in that direction.

When he got to the source of the scent, he found a large mud puddle. He could hear cats in the distance and knew this was his only chance. He jumped in, his body made a _splat_ as it landed in the thick mud. For a second he was reminded of his dream and shivered, but he snapped himself out of it and began rolling around. The mud made his fur mat and stick close to his body, showing off how emaciated he truly was, but he ignored the uncomfortable sensation and began running again. His whole body felt heavy and cold, but he couldn't stop now.

_

Worth groaned as she felt someone licking the wound on her head. She tried to open her eyes, but the world was spinning and pain shot through her entire body. She squeezed her eyes shut tight again. Whoever had been doctoring her head picked her up by her scruff and carried her somewhere. Light shone through her eyelids and she felt herself being put down. When she worked up the courage to open her eyes again, she was in the ring and her mother was standing in front of her looking worried.

"M-mom, did you bring me back?" she groaned letting her eyes close again.

"No, I didn't see who brought you back. You can't sleep, Worth, wake up," Sunny ordered urging her daughter desperately to open her eyes.

_

Frost came to the mud puddle not long after Darkpaw had fled. A smirk twisted onto his scarred face. "Clever, kitten, clever," he said before jumping the puddle and searching the other side for something.

Dusk attempted the same jump, and landed half-way across the mud in Darkpaw's body print. "Frost, help me! I don't think I can get out!" Dusk begged.

"Maybe later. I'm busy," Frost said before taking off.

"FROST!" Dusk screamed, but the silver tom was gone. Dusk began frantically trying to free himself from the freezing prison, but the mud had closed around his limbs, cementing him in place. "HELP, SOMEBODY, HELP!" Dusk cried.

Suddenly, he felt himself being lifted out of the mud and was placed on solid, dry ground. He tried to look up so he could see his savior, but he saw nothing. He felt a rush of air as something ran past him and felt something silky brush against his nose, but he could see nothing in the darkness.

_

Darkpaw stopped, trying to get a sense of where he was. How close or far from the ring he was. Where some other cats might be. He had assumed most of the cats would have stayed close to the ring and, as he couldn't see any, he was probably far away. He hoped he would actually be able to hear Lynn's call for him to come back. But then, he was more concerned about living to hear anything ever again.

Unfortunately, he paused too long. Frost came out of nowhere and crashed into the tabby, sending him rolling on the hard ground.

"There you are, Darky. Thought I'd lost you for a second there. Gotta give you props for your trick. Too bad covering yourself in mud then running leaves a little trail. Don't blame you, though. I tried the same trick when I was younger. Rookie mistake I never repeated after this," Frost said gesturing with his tail to a group of scars all over his shoulders and neck that left the flesh there almost furless. "Next time, try shaking off the excess before running. That's what my father told me. Good advice, too. Helped me get away from him the next time."

"So, why are you telling me this?" Darkpaw asked flexing his claws at the repeat of the nick-name 'Darky' now directed at him.

"Well, I kinda feel like we're almost family. I knew your dad pretty well, see? Knew your mommy, too."

"Honeydew said you didn't know who my parent were," Darkpaw said.

"I've had some more time to think about it. Under all that mud, you look just like him, you know. Of course with all that mud you look like Reaper. But it wasn't the coat that gave you away, oh no. It was your eyes. Your dead, empty, killer eyes," Frost said.

"Do all you cats from BloodClan talk this much?" Darkpaw asked.

"No. Of course, I've never been one for words myself either," Frost said and charged the tabby.

Darkpaw tried to get out of the way, but Frost seemed highly skilled in catching someone of his size. The silver tom's entire body was adjusted so that he was in the perfect position to scoop up the tabby and throw him into the air, and that's just what he did before catching him in his mouth again.

Darkpaw grunted and Frost's fangs closed over his belly when he descended from the air. Frost shook his head back and forth angrily before throwing Darkpaw to the ground. Darkpaw barely missed Frost's claws pounding him into the earth. He tried to get away, but Frost caught his tail and dragged him back.

Frost spat out Darkpaw's tail and placed a heavy paw on Darkpaw's shoulders, pinning the tabby to the ground.

"It's been a while since any of my kits got to this age, I miss it. My last son broke his neck when I tossed him. Too bad, he had the heart of a killer, just not the body of one I guess. I think the last one that made it to your size and beyond was my little daughter, Cara. She's a little monster just like you. Vicious animal, that one. Makes daddy proud. Maybe I'll bring her here one day, let you meet her. Oh wait I forgot, you won't live past tonight."

Darkpaw could feel the pressure on his body increase as Frost leaned forward to deliver the kill shot to Darkpaw's small spine. Darkpaw felt the fangs graze his fur, then nothing. The weight was gone. He looked up to see Frost staggering back. He was reeling back from blows that re-opened his old scars and made new ones on what was left of his normal flesh, but Darkpaw couldn't see where the blows were coming from. Flashes of white claws turning red were all he could see of Frost's attacker before the tom's head was smashed against a rock and he was out cold. Darkpaw stared at the savage who had apparently fallen victim to…nothing. Darkpaw didn't see anyone or anything.

"Look over here, little one."

Darkpaw spun to his left, all his fur bristling. He still couldn't see anything.

"Close your eyes."

Darkpaw did so and was startled by the signature of a cat right in front of him.

"Now that you know where I am, open your eyes."

Darkpaw did and he could make out the faint outline of a she-cat. "Y-you're Ghost, right?" he said.

White fangs appeared in a smile and moved up and down as Ghost nodded.

"Then, shouldn't you be trying to kill me or something?"

"That is not why Magi chose me to be a runner for you," Ghost said. Her voice was like a breeze, barely there, but refreshing all the same.

"But isn't that the point of The Run?"

"It can be, but it depends on who you're opponent was. A cat like Magi knows an opportunity when she…sees one."

"Opportunity?" Darkpaw asked.

"You're special, aren't you, Darkpaw? You can do things others can't. You feel and see things others don't."

"I'm a freak," Darkpaw said with a shrug.

"No, Darkpaw. You're special. Like Magi. Like me," Ghost said.

"I don't feel special," Darkpaw mumbled.

"I know. Those around you make it seem like your differences are a bad thing, but they aren't. They're beautiful, like you. I know you've been hurt, and I know that's what makes you the way you are, but it doesn't have to be this way, Darkpaw. You can do wonderful things with your gifts."

"I am doing wonderful things. I'm showing everyone out there that I am the best." Darkpaw smirked proudly.

"By killing others?"

"Isn't that what you do? You're a ringfighter just like the others."

"No, I'm not, but I have killed cats before. It's not something I'm proud of."

"Well I am!"

"Why?"

Darkpaw nearly took a step back from the question. "What do you mean?"

"Why does it make you proud to hurt and kill others?"

"W-well because, they'd hurt me otherwise. I've seen other cats do horrific things for no reason. I'm just doing the same."

"Darkpaw, I already told you, you're different from them."

"I know that! I'm better."

"Not like this."

"You wanna bet?" Darkpaw growled crouching down.

"You'll never touch me," Ghost sighed somehow making her voice even quieter.

"We'll see about that." Darkpaw sprang at Ghost, but hit nothing but air. He looked around in confusion. He closed his eyes to discover Ghost was behind him now. She had moved and he hadn't even seen it.

"I wish there were something I could do to reach you, Darkpaw. You have a strong spirit. Maybe someday you'll learn how to use. I just hope it's not too late." And just like that, Ghost was gone.

Darkpaw never saw her move, even with his eyes closed. She just wasn't there. Anger overwhelmed him. He heard Frost stir and saw the perfect opportunity to vent. He jumped onto the half-conscious tom's back and began raking his claws through the flesh like he was sharpening his claws on a fallen tree. This brought Frost back to consciousness fully and he began to screech so loudly Darkpaw could hear nothing else.

Blood coated his paws completely but he didn't stop until something slammed into his side. He looked up to see Ginger on top of him. The calico began cuffing his ears and forehead over and over with her claws. With a cry of rage, Darkpaw managed to throw her off before she could achieve any serious damage. She couldn't keep her balance on her paws when she landed and rolled onto her back. Darkpaw was upon her in an instant with his fangs to her delicate, furry neck.

"Go ahead. Do it," Ginger hissed daringly.

Darkpaw prepared to squeeze his jaws shut on the pulsing, warm flesh, but a loud call stopped him. The hour was over. He stood back up with a smirk. "Maybe next time," he said before taking off through the trees.

Honeydew struggled to support Frost with her shoulder. "Go get him, I've got Frost," Honeydew said noticing Ginger pausing to look at them.

Ginger nodded and took off after Darkpaw. However, following him was harder than she thought. The mud still hid his scent and she had never been a good tracker anyway. She soon lost him and hissed in frustration, clawing a tree.

_

Darkpaw thought he was in the clear as he saw the line of bushes approaching slowly.

"I SEE HIM! ROOK, HE'S OVER HERE!"

Darkpaw began cursing as he ran to the voice. He jumped on Slash this time. The tom let out a yowl, not expecting Darkpaw to catch him or even try to. Darkpaw managed to shove his paw into Slash's mouth when he yowled and he extended his claws to their full length before ripping his paw out.

Slash let out a muffled scream as his tongue was torn into three uneven strips. He rolled onto his stomach when Darkpaw got off and threw up blood, remains of an unidentifiable animal, and bits of what was once a collar.

"Shut the fuck up, dickwad," Darkpaw growled.

"Such a dirty mouth for such a little kit."

Darkpaw turned to see Rook approaching. J.T.'s warning flashed in his mind again. "I forgot you were out here," he admitted.

"I'm not so fast a runner. I waited for you," Rook said.

"Oh, clever."

"No more talk. It gets it the way of killing," Rook growled crouching down.

"I couldn't agree more," Darkpaw said crouching down as well. The two cats seemed to have completely forgotten about Slash who was still shivering and whimpering a few tail lengths away.

Darkpaw rushed in first, figuring Rook wasn't the type who would. Heavy paws batted at him, but he avoided them. He remembered the way Rook had moved when he had watched her fighting Sierra. Rook's style was easy to follow. She wasn't very agile and so depended on brute strength instead, allowing her enemy to come to her.

Darkpaw moved to jump on Rook's back, but the she-cat rolled over quickly and Darkpaw instead landed on her stomach. Four legs clamped over his body, holding him against Rook's heavy body. Rook rolled over so she was on top of Darkpaw, forcing all the air from his lungs. He heard cheering and looked up to discover a makeshift ring had been made around him and Rook. The other fighters were all watching, appearing very entertained by the suffocating kit.

Darkpaw tried to struggle out of Rook's grip, but her weight prevented him from moving much. He couldn't breathe. She wasn't biting him or doing anything to injure him. She was just waiting for him to die from suffocation. His body became desperate for oxygen and his muscles made his legs spasm desperately.

Rook threw her head back and laughed. Darkpaw managed to move his head just enough to clamp his jaws shut on…fur. Rook looked back down at him and laughed again.

"You will never be able to reach my throat to tear it out, kitten," she said.

Darkpaw was undeterred. When she moved her head down, he moved his up and re-clamped his jaws over her windpipe. Rook gasped but nothing entered her lungs. Darkpaw squeezed tighter, trapping her last breath in her lungs and keeping fresh air from replacing it.

It became a game of chicken as the two cats lay there, suffocating. The fighters didn't seem bothered by the lack of action, happy to see something dying anyway.

Darkpaw was getting dizzy, but he refused to lessen his grip for the smallest second. If he died, he would die clinging to this she-cat's throat. He used his legs to try to press up at Rook's chest. The air in her lungs begged to be released.

Rook stood up finally, allowing Darkpaw to take the breath he needed to keep holding tight. She tried to shake him but just ended up falling onto her side. Her limbs were now twitching and eventually went still as her eyes closed. Darkpaw felt the fluttering of her heart die out but didn't release her until his gift told him she was dead. He let her go and the air finally escaped her lungs, but much too late.

Darkpaw ignored the shocked look of the other fighters and ran in the direction of the ring. But the cats there had no intention of letting him through. He tried to get them out of his way, but something landed on his back. Ginger had finally caught him and was determined to keep him from returning. Darkpaw was far beyond the mood to deal with her and managed to twist around to grab her scruff. He ripped her from his back and threw her at the cats that were in his way. It caused them to part just enough for Darkpaw to squeeze through so he could continue running back to the ring.

Ginger was right at his heels the entire time. She tried to slash at him, but she didn't have Darkpaw's training. Darkpaw let her gain a few paces, but kicked up hard with his hind legs, raking her chin with his unsheathed hind claws and sending her to the ground hard.

He saw the ring with Lynn and Magi sitting in the middle. He jumped the last several tail lengths to Lynn and she tapped his shoulder with her tail as he shot by her. That was it. The run was over.

Ginger emerged first from the forest. Then Honeydew came supporting Frost. Worth had already been there along with Kuma, Tears, and Crys. The three toms looked very spooked.

"I'm telling you, they _floated _down the tree!" Kuma was insisting to Shadow.

"That's impossible," Shadow said calmly.

"That's what I woulda thought, but I _saw_ it happen with my own two eyes. We were tailing the kit. I caught his scent going up a tree and helped Tears and Crys up to the first branch thinking he might be up there but I lost my hold and fell back down and was out for a little bit. When I opened my eyes again Tears was floating back down the tree and then Crys did the same!" Kuma said.

"We didn't float. We were carried. But I couldn't see who was carrying us," Tears said.

"Yeah me either. And Kuma, you were out forever! We nearly yelled our lungs out for you to help us down after you got us stuck up there," Crys said batting the older tom over the head in annoyance.

"The important thing is that they're ok," Lynn said.

"Where's Dusk?" Darkpaw asked looking around. He was the only one, besides Rook and Ghost, who hadn't returned.

Shadow looked up as did the others. "Did anyone see him leave the forest?"

Murmurs went around the group but no one could provide any information. Suddenly Dusk emerged from the trees, eyes closed and fur bloodied. He appeared to be floating towards them.

"IT'S HAPPENING AGAIN!" Kuma screamed and ran off.

As Dusk came more into view it became apparent that he was being carried by Ghost. Though even in the light she was hard to see. Ghost carried him to the center of the ring and laid him there in front of Lynn.

"A badger was out there tonight. He must have gotten lost and isolated and it found him. I don't know if he can be saved," Ghost said.

"Take him with Frost, Slash, and Worth. See if Draco and Taka are in a giving mood tonight," Lynn said.

Ghost nodded and picked Dusk back up, carrying him out of sight.

"Darkpaw, do you want to get cleaned up?" T.J. asked as Darkpaw walked out of the ring to let the next fight start.

Darkpaw nodded and T.J. led him back up the slope where they could still have a good view of the fights. Darkpaw began cleaning the drying mud off his fur with T.J. helping here and there as well.

"You know, my first impression of Kuma was that he was braver than that," Darkpaw said grinning.

"First impressions can be deceiving. He is brave, but very superstitious. When he gets spooked, it takes a while for him to calm down," T.J. said laughing a bit.

"Who are Draco and Taka?" Darkpaw asked as he picked dirt from between his paw pads.

"I've never seen them myself. They are two very old cats who live on their own in a den somewhere. On rare occasions a ringfighter might be taken to them by Ghost to have their wounds tended to by them. The cats are always given an herb that wipes their memory of it, though. Only Ghost ever knows where they are. They don't always help grown cats, but they rarely ever turn down a kit," T.J. said pulling a twig off Darkpaw's head.

"So they might not help Slash and Frost?" Darkpaw asked.

"Maybe not, but they will most likely help Worth and Dusk in any way they can."

"Why didn't Honeydew go? I hurt her, too."

"Her injury wasn't severe enough for them to bother with her. They only deal with immediate life and death in grown cats."

Darkpaw was silent as he mulled this over in his head. If any of the injuries he had caused got infected, they could all result in death. But it wouldn't be immediate. He wasn't sure of exactly how Draco and Taka worked, but the idea of them leaving Slash and Frost with their injuries to die slow, painful deaths brought a smile to his face.

Darkpaw finished grooming, only half-interested in the fights going on below him. When the night was over, he stood and shook himself, prepared to go back to his own territory for some much needed rest.

"Darkpaw, hold on," Shadow called climbing the slope.

"What?" Darkpaw asked.

"Ghost wishes to challenge you," Shadow explained.

"…What?" Darkpaw said again, "I thought she wasn't a ringfighter."

"She's a special case. Do you accept?" Shadow asked.

"I…uh…yeah sure," Darkpaw said.

"Good. She will be waiting for you the next time you come. Meet her at the edge of your territory," Shadow said.

"Um, ok," Darkpaw said and turned back to walk to ShadowClan.

"That's…unexpected," T.J. said walking by his side.

"That's one way to put it," Darkpaw whispered, running into the tall grass.

_

Darkpaw trotted calmly into the camp. He was tired and just wanted to lay in his nest and sleep. He walked into the apprentices' den, but a scent hit him. As he walked in, he saw a pair of glowing eyes focused on him belonging to the cat laying in his nest.

"Where have you been?" Windlegs growled…

**Uh-oh Darkpaw has some explaining to do. Yay! A longish chapter! Reviews make Darkpaw happy! And what do you guys think of Ghost?**


	23. Chapter 22

**Ok, just as a heads up, we will be seeing violence and gore from a totally different character than we normally do.**

Windlegs found herself unable to sleep that night. She finally gave up trying and stepped out into the starry night. To her surprise, she saw a small black and silver tabby form sneak out of the apprentices' den and disappear into the forest. She glanced around to ensure no one was watching and ran across the camp to follow the figure.

It seemed as though they had been running for ages before the tabby finally paused at the edge of the territory. Windlegs figured that now she could finally step out and make herself known. She began to walk out and call to Darkpaw, but he held himself high and strutted through the bushes and across the border. Windlegs gasped quietly and held herself low to see what was going on.

To her utter shock, she saw Darkpaw speaking with a cat she had never seen before. The lack of the moon made it difficult for Windlegs to get a clear view of the stranger, but she got a basic idea. His entire body was black save half of his face, which was white, and scars striped his body.

"It's good to see you, Darkpaw. Are you ready?" the stranger asked.

"Don't waste my time with foolish questions, T.J., lest I get bored," Darkpaw replied but excitement seemed to be emulating off of him.

The stranger, T.J., just smirked and turned towards the edge of the clearing on the other side of the two-leg nest with Darkpaw following closely behind him.

Windlegs didn't know what to make of what she was seeing. Darkpaw was being a traitor. No, it couldn't be! Darkpaw wouldn't do such a thing. He was smarter than that. But then why did he seem to know that tom so well? Surely he must have a good reason.

As Windlegs re-entered the camp, she went to the apprentices' den to await an explanation before going to Blackstar. The longer she waited, the more she thought. The more she thought, the angrier she became. How could Darkpaw do this? To the clan, to her! After all she had tried to do for him! He was proving everyone's suspicions about him correct!

When the night was nearly over, Darkpaw finally appeared in the den entrance. He seemed hesitant at first, but slowly came in. His fur had recently been groomed but bits of dry leaves and a few specks of mud from his run back revealed that he had not been peaceful this night. He appeared a lot more than shocked to see her laying in his nest.

"Where have you been?" Windlegs growled.

The tone of her voice caused Darkpaw to feel as if he had been frozen in place. Her eyes pierced through his and he felt as if she could see his thoughts. "What are you doing in here, Windlegs? Shouldn't you be asleep?" he asked struggling to keep his voice calm and monotone.

"Don't ignore my question!" she hissed.

"What question?"

Windlegs stood and began approaching him, aggression flowing off of her in waves few cats had ever experienced before. "Where the fuck have you been?" she repeated.

"Oh, that question," Darkpaw said forcing himself not to take a step back or shiver. Instead he tried to walk around her to get to his nest but she blocked his path. "Windlegs, I thought you would have figured out by now that I sometimes walk around the territory at night. I don't always sleep very well and it helps me relax," he explained.

"Walking around the territory is one thing. But I saw you leave!" she nearly shouted.

"Saw me leave? You followed me?! How dare you invade my privacy like that! What's wrong with you, Windlegs?!" Darkpaw shouted. He doubted this routine to get her off his back would work, but desperation drives sensibility from one's mind.

As Darkpaw expected, Windlegs was not one to be drawn in. "Oh no, don't you _dare_ try to weasel your way out of this! Do you realize how serious this is? _Do you?!_" Windlegs had now joined in yelling.

"It was no big deal I was just looking at something. It's not like I invaded another clan's territory. I didn't even do anything," Darkpaw insisted. He had no idea how far she might have followed him or how much she had seen. He cursed himself with being so comfortable as to assume no one would ever be around to follow him.

"I _saw _you talking with a rouge!" Windlegs shrieked. Darkpaw seemed stunned into silence so she continued, not calming down at all. "Do you know what could happen to you if Blackstar finds out? What were you thinking? What were you doing? Are you trying to make yourself look even worse?"

Darkpaw finally regained his ability to speak. "Windlegs, you will go back to the warriors' den, go to sleep, and never speak of this to anyone," he commanded.

"Don't talk to me like I'm a kit, Darkpaw! You will explain yourself to me," Windlegs growled.

"Windlegs, go back to your nest and go to sleep!"

"You can either tell me or Blackstar."

"Windlegs! Drop this nonsense right now and go back to sleep! It was nothing you need to concern yourself with, it's over now. GO BACK TO YOUR NEST!!!" Darkpaw shouted advancing a step towards the she-cat. Darkpaw was on his back beneath Windlegs with the wind knocked from his lungs before he could comprehend what had happened.

"You will not speak to me in such a manner, apprentice. I am a warrior and I demand respect. You _will _tell me where you were and what you were doing or I _will _take you to Blackstar _by force _if necessary. Do I make myself clear?"

Windlegs's voice had dropped down so low Darkpaw was certain if he wasn't nearly nose-to-nose with her that he never would have heard. Darkpaw felt trapped, so he did the one thing he could think of: he thought.

Windlegs saw the calculating look appear in Darkpaw's eyes. She angrily placed a silver paw on his chest and shallowly dug her claws into the young flesh. "I'm becoming impatient," she hissed.

"Those rouges that live there, I wanted to see them. I wanted to know what cats outside of the clans were like. I wanted to know if they would hate me like the cats here do. I wasn't going to leave ShadowClan, I just wanted to know if there was anybody who would accept me if only for a night," Darkpaw said. He had had plenty of practice being downhearted to fake it now. "I met one that day I went hunting with you. I asked if there were others and if I could meet them. He invited me to tonight and so I went. Turns out they really aren't trustworthy. They attacked me. I barely got out of there alive." Darkpaw laid his ears back against his head and looked as betrayed as possible. The last bit wasn't entirely a lie and he knew he would need to explain whey he reeked of rouge and blood. "I just wanted to see if I could fit in anywhere," he added for extra effect.

It seemed to work as Windlegs backed off him and allowed him to stand up. "You're an idiot," she said suddenly.

Darkpaw felt his stomach sink into his paws, worried she hadn't bought his story.

"You could have been killed! Darkpaw, that's no way to make friends," she continued.

'Oh thank StarClan,' Darkpaw thought before looking at the ground "ashamed". "I know, Windlegs, I know. It's just hard. You really don't understand what it's like," he said. Windlegs said nothing. "Are you gonna tell Blackstar?" he asked looking up at her with the most innocent and pleading eyes he could muster.

Windlegs felt her heart soften as she looked at Darkpaw's expression. Perhaps she felt sorry for him, perhaps she was just too tired to argue anymore, perhaps both. She answered, "No," but added, "But never do that again or I _will _tell Blackstar," before leaving the den.

Darkpaw watched her go before smirking and laying down in his nest finally. "You're so nice, Windlegs. I guess that's your weakness. I am grateful, though. I doubt Blackstar would be so forgiving and easy to fool," he said before curling up and falling asleep in his nest that now had the overpowering scent of Windlegs in it.

_

_He was walking across the oh-so-familiar plane his dreams often melded into. Nothing but black under his paws and stars doming above with the faint outline of trees in the distance surrounding him. It amazed him that bloodstains did not taint this perfect floor of black. So much blood had been spilt here, normally by him. Foes fell or he fell, but blood would spill._

_This was a strange dream. For the first time, he seemed completely aware that he was dreaming. Normally it was just a nagging knowledge in the back of his mind that he couldn't quite grasp. The real world and dream world did not like to mix. As he wandered across the vast, never ending plane, he wondered what he was supposed to do. He was completely alone. Or so he thought._

_A figure started appearing in the distance. At first believing the dark mass to be his mother, he began to run, hoping against hope that for once he could just have a happy dream. But, as he got closer, he noticed distinct tabby markings and slowed. He didn't know what to make of this stranger. It was not Tigerstripe, nor was it any other tabby Darkpaw could think of. This stranger shared his silver and black coloring. The new tabby was turned away from Darkpaw so he could not see their face. His curiosity getting the better of him, Darkpaw spoke._

"_Who are you?" he asked, deciding regular greetings weren't much of a necessity in this dream land. He was no less than stunned when the cat turned around. This cat, this new tom, looked exactly like him. Black and silver swirls and angles covered his glossy pelt, his eyes were an icy blue Darkpaw had only ever seen matched in his own reflection, lean muscles were not overly visible under the short, sleek fur. The only difference was a small scar that crossed over the tom's nose and the fact that he was fully grown. This stranger looked much calmer than Darkpaw was about their meeting. "Who are you?" Darkpaw asked again._

"_I think you already know," the tom responded. His voice was a few octaves lower than Darkpaw's, but otherwise the same._

"_Darkstripe?" Darkpaw wasn't really surprised when he got a nod of conformation. "What are you doing here? Don't you have a Hell to be in or something?"_

_Darkstripe smirked. "You've inherited wit."_

"_No, I made it for myself. I have no one to inherit things from," Darkpaw growled. He found himself highly disinterested in this figure that was supposed to be his father. Or was he just disappointed that it wasn't his mother? Either way, he knew this was all his imagination. None of it was real. This wasn't his father speaking to him. His father was in some dark forest wandering around alone for eternity as punishment for his sins. He had left behind his son to pay for his sins as well. Here, in the regular forest, suffering alone just the same._

"_You have a father and a mother," Darkstripe said._

"_No, I don't. I'm a bastard. No wait, I'm an orphan. You were dead before I was born and my mother left me. She's probably dead, too. I have no family and I don't want one," Darkpaw hissed._

"_What's your name?" Darkstripe asked._

"_What's it matter?"_

"_Just tell me."_

"_Darkstripe. I was named after you." Darkpaw glared at the ground. That was his name. That was the name his mother had given him. It was not a clan name. Not anymore. It was a rouge's name._

"_And that's what they call you?"_

"_Some of the time."_

"_What does your leader call you?"_

"_Darkpaw, mostly. But when he named me, it was Darkstripepaw so nobody would forget who I really was, your son."_

"_So you introduce yourself by my name, the name given to you by your mother, and it's your mother you wish to see here, yet you care nothing for family?" Darkstripe smirked and it was a dead ringer for Darkpaw's own smirk._

"_That is my name and I like to think my mother was showing she cared about me in some strange way when she left me with ShadowClan." Darkpaw was still staring at his paws as he spoke. "You, though, I know nothing about. I don't know if you even cared about my mother and I wouldn't care if you did or didn't. You both left me here alone, so what's it matter?"_

"_I didn't leave you, Darkstripe."_

_Darkpaw looked up. The voice had changed and so had the speaker. No longer was he looking at his father, but a black-as-night she-cat with bright green eyes that made him feel safe in some small way. "M-momma?" Darkpaw asked. He tried to stop himself from hoping it was true in case it wasn't, because it wasn't, but he wanted it too bad and the hope made his chest ache as it rose within him._

"_It's me, Darkstripe, I'm here," she said in a voice soft as a breeze._

_Darkpaw didn't remember telling his paws to move, but he found himself running towards her. This time, he actually reached her and when he did he buried his nose in her fur and inhaled a warm and beautifully familiar scent. It was her scent, he knew it. He had never forgotten._

"_That's it, my boy. My beautiful boy." Her tail curled protectively around him._

"_Momma. Momma. Momma," was all he could say. He chanted it over and over until it just became noise but he didn't stop. The mantra made him feel even safer, disconnected him from his conscious mind filled with worries and doubts and just let him fall into the fantasy that here was his mother cradling him against her warm and alive body, whispering kind things to him. He was too old to take comfort in his parent like this, but he didn't care. The fantasy permitted it._

"_Is this what you've always wanted, then?"_

_Darkpaw came crashing back to reality. The scent changed as did the texture of the fur and the sound of the voice, but he refused to open his eyes. He refused to let go of the fantasy so soon. He squeezed his eyes shut so tight it hurt, but the reality of what was going on was already branding itself in his mind's eye painfully._

"_Why did you do this to me?" he asked forcing his voice not to shake as a lump rose in his throat._

"_I needed to understand you better. No one can hide in their dreams," Ghost said. She did not move her position, allowing the kit to cling to the last bits of his fantasy before pulling himself out on his own. He removed his face from her chest, eyes wide and glassy and filled with…betrayal. But betrayal seemed all too at home in those eyes and Ghost's heart went out to the kitten._

"_You wanted to understand me?" he buried his face back in her chest fur, his small body trembling slightly, "Why does everybody want to do that? There's nothing to understand. I'm a traitor's son. I'm an orphan. No one gives a rat's ass about me and I accept that. There's nothing special about me. Why won't everybody just leave me alone?" His voice was muffled by the she-cat's chest fur but the cracks in it were clear._

"_Because half the things you just said are not true," Ghost said and met the icy eyes again as they looked back up at her in confusion. For the first time since she had seen him, Darkpaw looked genuinely like a kit. "You do have friends that care about you and I've already told you that you are special," Ghost explained._

_Darkpaw looked down at the ground again, his eyes narrowed and his ears laid back against his head. "Who are your parents?" he asked quietly._

_Ghost was half-surprised by the kit's question, expecting more protests about his friends. "I don't know. I'm an orphan, too."_

_A calculating look appeared in the blue pools before Darkpaw spoke again. "Who are Magi's parents?"_

"_She has none, either. She was abandoned by her parents because she was blind." Ghost had been prepared for that one._

"_There are others?" Darkpaw asked, still looking down with his calculating expression._

"_There are," Ghost confirmed, "All with similar stories. Not all are orphaned or abandoned immediately. Some are mistreated or just born mentally unstable. Some orphaned themselves by killing their parents or ran away and had to fend for themselves."_

"_So all these cats with gifts they-"_

"_They suffer," Ghost finished Darkpaw's sentence for him, "They are born of, and live in, suffering."_

"_Why?"_

"_That's just what we need to go through for us to fulfill our purpose."_

"_What's their…our purpose?"_

"_It varies. It all depends on where we are. Generally, it's to help teach a lesson to the others around us. Think about it, do you think any of your clan or even any of the forest envies you?"_

_Darkpaw shook his head. "They'd all rather die."_

"_Exactly, because your life is the definition of everything they are afraid to go through. They probably wouldn't be able to last a single day in your life."_

"_Why?"_

"_Because they aren't special, Darkpaw. You are the only one capable of carrying the burden of your message. Even I couldn't. I know you think you are worthless, but you have a higher purpose than any of the cats in the forest. You have what they all think they want."_

"_What's that?" Darkpaw finally looked back up into Ghost's eyes. They were so dark and glassy he could see his reflection in them._

"_A destiny," Ghost told him gently._

"_I though everyone had a destiny," Darkpaw said._

"_No. A destiny requires that the bearer suffer and struggle to fulfill that destiny. Most cats simply live their lives. If they are lucky, or unlucky depending on your view, they might play a part in a chosen one's destiny. Like your friends Mudriver, Thundertail, and Windlegs."_

_Darkpaw didn't know how she had gotten these names, but he didn't really care. He didn't bother arguing with her any further about the meaning Mudriver and the other's held in his life. Friends, or whatever she wanted to call them, what destiny exactly were they playing a part in? What was he supposed to be doing and who was he supposed to be doing it for? All he could come up with through an educated guess was that it would be for ShadowClan if those involved with him were such. So there had been a reason he was taken to ShadowClan after all._

"_What is your purpose?" he asked after a little while of thought._

_Ghost smiled. "I cannot tell you."_

_Darkpaw frowned up at her. "Why?"_

"_Because to tell someone would be lessening the burden and that could affect the outcome," Ghost said._

"_So when I figure out what it is I'm supposed to be doing, I can't tell anyone?" Darkpaw asked, liking the sound of this even less than he had previously._

"_Exactly," Ghost confirmed._

'_Damn, I was hoping I had heard wrong,' Darkpaw thought._

"_You knew you hadn't," Ghost said to Darkpaw's surprise._

"_How did you-?"_

"_We are inside your mind, Darkpaw. Your thoughts are not private here," Ghost explained._

"_Oh." Darkpaw was really starting to like this less and less as time went on. "So, about that fight you challenged me to, what exactly-?"_

"_My time runs short here as does yours. You need to wake soon. I will see you again though I cannot say when. Goodbye, Darkpaw." With that Ghost vanished as did the rest of the plane._

_

Darkpaw blinked his eyes awake as the smallest bit of sunlight shone at the entrance of the den. The light was soon blocked, however, by a large, fluffy mass.

"Darkpaw. Hey, Darkpaw. It's time to wake up. You have training to do," Mudriver called into the den.

"Yeah, Mudriver, I'm awake," Darkpaw called back. He stood up and stretched before padding out of the den to meet his mentor.

"Wow, I can't remember when I didn't have to wake you up," Mudriver joked.

Darkpaw smirked and shook his head, knowing damn well Mudriver didn't have to wake him up all that often. His mind was somewhere else. Back in his dream world, going over what Ghost had told him. So his suspicions had been confirmed, his life was all about suffering. He was meant to suffer all his days to teach a lesson to these cats. Whoever had given him this destiny, he assumed, probably played a part in how intolerant the clan cats were being. Or was he here to stop them from being intolerant? He had no idea. He wished someone would just spell out what he was supposed to do for him, but that would probably lessen the burden and make this message less effective. Darkpaw smiled mentally. These cats hated him, and yet he was their closest connection to whatever higher powers might exist…besides Littlecloud. Darkpaw suddenly wondered if he was meant to be a medicine cat, but quickly threw this idea aside. The clan didn't like him hunting for them, let alone healing them. Besides, Ghost had said Mudriver and Thundertail would be the ones affecting his journey, she had said nothing of Littlecloud or anything about medicine.

Mudriver greeted Windlegs as they passed by her, but Darkpaw kept his head down and his mouth shut. He felt an icy chill creep up his spine, however, as he passed beneath the white warrior's gaze. Clearly she was nowhere near forgiving him for what he had done, but he didn't care. All he needed was for her to not find out what he was really doing when he left the territory at night. And it was especially critical that she stay out of his business now that he had made contact with Ghost. If she held some sort of answer for him, then he wasn't going to let Windlegs or anyone else stand in his way of hearing it.

Darkpaw, so lost in his thoughts, did not notice Mudriver stop in front of him until he slammed into the older tom's hind leg. He shook his head and looked up in confusion at his mentor. He was startled to see Mudriver with his hackles raised and growling furiously in front of him. Darkpaw followed Mudriver's gaze to find Snaketail to be the cause of this disturbance.

"You wanna say that about my apprentice again, bitch?" Mudriver growled with ferocity Darkpaw had never seen on the happy-go-lucky tom before.

"Are you that hard of hearing, you stupid heap of dung? I said you're wasting your time in training the bastard and he'll turn on you soon enough. You're getting your clan killed by teaching him how to fight. You're just as big a traitor as he is. Look at him. He's a disgusting monster, a waste of a life. Open your eyes, dumbass, see him for what he really is: a freak," Snaketail hissed, casting a piercing glare and Darkpaw, but Mudriver stepped in front of his apprentice, blocking him from her view.

"Blackstar appointed him to me. I'd be a traitor if I didn't train him. At least I didn't make an innocent kit's life Hell just because my genes are too weak to survive in this world," Mudriver shot back.

Darkpaw was shocked. Part of him wanted to intervene, but the other part told him Mudriver was not going to let him.

"How dare you say that about my kits?!" Snaketail shrieked and slapped Mudriver across his face with her claws unsheathed. Her claws tangled in his fur and she ended up ripping out several strands, drawing a hiss from the young tom. "Filthy beast," Snaketail said feeling satisfaction as blood began to ooze through Mudriver's fur.

"I was kinda hoping you'd do that," Mudriver said and his head shot up to stare Snaketail in the eyes. His yellow eyes were wide and filled with such anger and hate they were practically twins of Darkpaw's.

Before Darkpaw could take another breath, Mudriver had lept on Snaketail, tackling her right out of the camp exit. Darkpaw and a small group of onlookers followed. Some cats cried that this had to be stopped but no one intervened. In ShadowClan, disputes are solved by individuals personally.

Mudriver almost had Snaketail pinned, but she slithered out of his grasp, biting hard on his ear and clawing at his face with her front paws. He yowled and tossed his head so hard that Snaketail was slammed back onto the ground. She clawed at Mudriver's neck, claws unsheathed and showing no mercy. Darkpaw was sure that if it weren't for Mudriver's thick coat, he'd be bleeding to death at this very moment. Mudriver lifted himself onto his hind paws and slammed back down again, crushing Snaketail's chest with his weight. Snaketail moved just in time to maneuver one of the grey tom's paws into her mouth and bit down hard on it. Mudriver cried out and pulled back, the momentum allowing Snaketail to roll onto her stomach and get back to her paws but she refused to let go. Mudriver tried to bat her off with his free paw, but this forced him to balance on his hind paws, something he couldn't do well without full control over his body and Snaketail knew this. The brown she-cat lifted herself onto her hind paws, dragging Mudriver's body up with her before she twisted suddenly and caused them both to fall to the ground with her on top of the tom, her jaws now clamping into his chest. Mudriver cried out again and kicked out with his hind legs, causing deep gashes in Snaketail's hips, but she held on.

As Darkpaw watched, he became more and more angry. The urge to kill Snaketail was growing within him more than it ever had before. He knew he could if he moved quick enough. This was no petty squabble like he had had with her before, this was a full on battle between a senior warrior and a much younger warrior with much less experience. Darkpaw started to move forward, wanting to help Mudriver, but a crooked yellow tail stopped him. He looked up in confusion into two other yellow eyes.

"You can't interfere, Darkpaw. I want to help him, too, but my brother started this and he has to finish it on his own," Thundertail said to Darkpaw over the cries of the other cats, pain filled her eyes at having to leave her brother to this fate and Darkpaw saw just how different ShadowClan and the ringfighters were.

Both cats looked back at the fight suddenly as another piercing yowl broke out.

Mudriver had managed to hook his claws deep enough into Snaketail's hips to throw her off of him. The long black claws might be hidden from view normally under the thick fur that coated Mudriver's paws, but they were punishing. Chunks of flesh hung from Snaketail's sides where Mudriver had torn into her wounds to get a grip. It was amazing that she had held out for as long as she had. Mudriver's chest was stained red and drops of blood slid down his long fur and dripped to the ground. He stood there, staring Snaketail down for several moments before Snaketail collapsed, no longer able to support her weight on her wounded legs. She crashed to the dirt, hind legs painted red but still glaring at Mudriver. Mudriver approached her, towering over her and making her appear small and helpless even as his blood dripped onto her forehead and slid down her face.

"Don't you dare EVER talk about my apprentice in such a way again. Do you understand me, Snaketail? Because next time, I _will _kill you regardless of the consequences that I may suffer afterwards," Mudriver growled, still glaring down at Snaketail but the warning was meant for everyone.

Murmurs went out among the gathered cats and Thundertail's eyes shone with pride as she looked at her brother.

"Someone get Blackstar and Littlecloud," someone finally called.

"I'm already here," Blackstar said, moving through the crowd with Littlecloud and Russetfur in tow.

Thundertail visibly tensed when she saw the three cats appear. Littlecloud and Russetfur managed to pick Snaketail up with the aid of a couple other warriors.

As they carried her away, Darkpaw heard her mumble, "You see? The rouge has infected a cat within your own clan. One of you will be next. You'll see. I told you."

Thundertail swept her tail protectively around Darkpaw as a few cats turned to look at him.

Blackstar was standing almost nose-to-nose with Mudriver, staring into the youth's eyes. Mudriver held his ears and tail high yet respective and submissive to his leader.

"I will not apologize for what I have done, sir," Mudriver said.

"No, I would expect not. Go to Littlecloud's den, you're still bleeding, I'll discuss this with you later," Blackstar said and Mudriver dipped his head before doing as he was told. "The rest of you, go back to your duties, the excitement is over."

The cats began to depart. Darkpaw caught Windlegs's eye, but they both turned away quickly.

Mudriver paused on his way to Littlecloud's den and leaned down painfully to address Darkpaw. "That was your lesson for today," he said before straightening up, rubbing the uninjured side of his face lovingly with his sister's, and went to the medicine cat's den to get his wounds taken care of.

Blackstar, Thundertail, and Darkpaw were the last one's left on the battleground.

"Thundertail, I'm going to train young Darkpaw today," Blackstar said.

"Blackstar I can-"

"You go to your brother," Blackstar commanded cutting Thundertail off.

"Yes, Blackstar," Thundertail said before dipping her head, unwrapping her tail from around Darkpaw, and sprinting back into the camp.

Darkpaw felt a slight empty feeling at the loss of contact with Thundertail, but he didn't have time to dwell on it as Blackstar was suddenly standing over him.

"Let's go, kit," Blackstar said and Darkpaw followed him into the briars…

**Ok, so the idea for this dream was something I've been playing with for a while now. I knew I wanted to make Darkpaw interact with his father at some point (even if it wasn't really him). Also, the fight scene with Snaketail and Mudriver, probably gonna be one of my favorite scenes in this story, again I really wanted to show a character in a new situation. I wanted to show him as more than just a goof, and actually a skilled warrior and what better way than to have him defending Darkpaw to kind of tie in what others have been trying to tell him about having friends that do care about him. So, reviews make Darkpaw happy and I wanna know what you, the reader, think about badass Mudriver.**


	24. Chapter 23

**I know it's been a while. Been busy. But hey, the chapter's pretty long so maybe that'll make up for it a bit.**

**Warning: Ok, you're all used to blood and guts and gore from this story by now, or at least I hope you are, but this chapter contains what I think is the most gruesome death I have written so far for this story. So be warned this chapter may cause nausea or a really bad day. You've been warned. I did rate this story M for a reason. I mean technically this isn't even recommended for anyone under 17, but I'm under 17 and I'm **_**writing **_**it so I'd be kinda a hypocrite if I said 'hey you can't read this, you're too young!' so, yeah. In short: warning, chapter may cause you to go to an unhappy place. (Or a happy place if you're **_**really**_** fucked-up in the head.)**

Darkpaw stepped over and under the brambles and briars Blackstar was leading him through. It occurred him to ask where they were going, but he decided against it. Blackstar did not look back to ensure he was following or slow his pace to help Darkpaw keep up. Blackstar's left ear suddenly flicked back.

"Freeze," he ordered.

Darkpaw did immediately. He did not even place his paw down, wondering what Blackstar made him stop for.

"Look down," Blackstar said, still not looking back at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw looked at the ground and saw a huge thorn directly under where he would have put his paw down had Blackstar not stopped him. The apprentice was amazed. "How…?"

"I paid attention to the trail. Lucky I did, too, or you'd have a nasty wound right now," Blackstar said before continuing off into the briars.

Darkpaw cautiously stepped over the thorn and kept very vigilant for any other dangers. Blackstar said no more and Darkpaw could hardy keep up with the white tail in front of him. Blackstar was sure-footed in here and his longer legs allowed him easier passage through the thorns.

Blackstar finally lept out of the briar patch into the tall grass. Darkpaw quickly followed, not wanting to loose the older tom. He cried out and crashed hard down a steep slope he had not seen due to the grass. When he finally stopped rolling, his side gently hit one of Blackstar's paws. He opened his eyes to see his leader looking down at him with an unreadable, expressionless face.

"Never follow blindly," Blackstar said before standing and padding into the grass once more, making almost no noise.

Darkpaw stood, shook himself, and followed. He was embarrassed, to say the least, but he had learned his lesson. He followed steadily behind Blackstar, listening to the leader's footfalls to predict, somewhat, what the terrain was like. He imagined using his gift, but the interference from the grass surrounding him would prove too much of a hassle to discern.

Suddenly, he realized that the footfalls ahead of him were growing quicker. Darkpaw sped up as well, not wanting to get lost in here. Again, the pace changed as Blackstar began moving more quickly through the grass, still hardly making a sound. Darkpaw sped up, again, and so did Blackstar. Eventually, Darkpaw was racing madly through the grass, trying to catch sight of his leader. Blackstar had shot so far ahead by this time that Darkpaw could not even hear him anymore. The grass whipped at his pelt and he knew that he was not being nearly as quiet and fluid as Blackstar had been. Wind and blood roared in his ear and he began to panic. Everything looked the same. The grass was too high to see over. Only a small dot of blue sky was visible. The long sharp blades were like the bars of a cage.

Darkpaw suddenly stopped, frozen. He could hear his heart pounding and his eyes watered as he held them unbearably wide. He was in a cage. Alone in a cage. Trapped. He could not escape. His legs began to shake and his heart pounded so hard it hurt his chest. He was suddenly running again, blindly. He could not see the grass even as it whipped his pelt. It just continued on and on without end.

"Blackstar!" he cried.

An enormous form suddenly sprang out of the grass and tackled Darkpaw to the ground. The tabby let out a yowl and was too stunned to stop his attacker from pinning him to the ground on his stomach. One heavy paw was placed on his shoulders, keeping him down, and another was in front of his face. The jet black fur on the paw reached up and clashed with pure white. Darkpaw looked up, panting and shaking, and saw Blackstar staring down at him once again, his face still expressionless.

"Where are we?" Blackstar demanded in a monotone.

"W-what?" Darkpaw stammered.

"Have you lost your sense of direction? What is beyond that wall of grass?" Blackstar said, flicking at said wall with his tail.

"I…I don't know. More grass?" Darkpaw guessed.

Blackstar finally lifted his paw off Darkpaw's back and moved the grass aside. The two-leg dump lay just beyond the meadow that now stretched out in front of the apprentice. It was a side Darkpaw had never seen before and he was astonished that Blackstar could keep his wits about him to locate it.

Blackstar stepped out into the meadow. Darkpaw moved to follow but stumbled back when the thick grass snapped shut on his nose. He growled and barreled through the prison into the open air. Suddenly, he felt exposed and considered returning, but Blackstar was waiting for him in the center of the meadow. Insecurities aside, Darkpaw prepared to race over to meet his leader. He then remembered Blackstar's warning not to follow blindly and how notoriously unpredictable ShadowClan territory could be, so he made his way over cautiously and saved himself the disaster of falling into a huge puddle just before reaching Blackstar. The water practically turned the grass around it into a marsh and Darkpaw had a difficult time trying to figure out how to get across. Finding no way over on dry land, Darkpaw looked over at Blackstar for help. Blackstar said nothing and did not move a muscle. The tabby felt exasperated but finally decided that if he wanted any hints he'd have to find them. Blackstar's huge paws caught his attention and he realized that they were wet. All of the black and some of the white on his legs were wet, his belly was untouched. Darkpaw calculated about how deep the water was before carefully stepping in.

The fur on his belly just barely collected some water and he had to lift his legs uncomfortably high to walk. He felt his tail skim the water and quickly raised it high. He reached the other side and stepped away from Blackstar and shook himself thoroughly.

"You're a fast learner," Blackstar commented as Darkpaw began licking his legs dry.

"I know," Darkpaw said, "I used to think I was a fast runner, but you have me beat by a long shot."

"You have time."

"Are there any other dangers I need to worry about back here? Are we finally going to stay put?" Darkpaw asked. Looking up, he saw that it was just past sun high, yet it felt so much later to him. It was still cool and he saw dark clouds gathering in front of the sun, casting shadows across the forest.

"Just me and yes we are," Blackstar answered.

"So what are we learning? Combat?"

"What makes you think that?"

"I would assume you are taking the time to train me because you want some one-on-one time with me so that you can study me. See what I'm like. You want to see how violent I am so you'll have me fight and see how much control I'll lose or something like that," Darkpaw said, finishing with his legs and sitting to face Blackstar.

"Interesting conclusion, but I'm not here to study you, I'm here to train you since your mentor will be out of commission until further notice," Blackstar said.

"Then why didn't you have Thundertail train me? You've already had your apprentice. One would think you'd want to spend time in camp with the clan."

"One may think that, but Russetfur is just as capable of handling the clan as I am. I want to train you instead of Thundertail because, while she is a fine warrior, she and Mudriver are too young to teach you something crucial as effectively as they'll need to."

"And what is that?" Darkpaw asked.

"Awareness," Blackstar answered simply.

"Awareness?" Darkpaw repeated, "I'm aware. I'm very aware."

"Sometimes. But you are young and unconditioned to be able to control your awareness, to control you mind and hone your senses and keep yourself from falling apart," Blackstar said calmly.

"You're referring to how I behaved in the grass?" Darkpaw said.

"No. I'm referring to how you act always. You are unaware of your environment except in the most miniscule, primal, instinctive sense. You have to learn to connect your senses to the environment. Allow your mind out of your head."

Darkpaw was confused. He thought he could already do all these things. Then, something else occurred to him. "Mentors teach their apprentices this?" he asked.

Blackstar nodded.

"You were a rouge. No one trained you. How did you learn these things?" He was unafraid to ask the question. Blackstar had never tried to hide or bury his past from the clan.

Blackstar looked up at the darkening sky, then back down at the apprentice. "When I went to get my nine lives, the cats that presented me with them gave me everything I would need to lead ShadowClan and, in a way, trained me," he explained.

"Can I ask one more question?"

Blackstar nodded.

"I though ShadowClan was bathed in, well, shadows and only WindClan held the moor. I didn't know there was a meadow on the territory. I mean, I knew there was a clearing around the dump but this is just…" Darkpaw trailed off.

For the first time, Blackstar's mask broke and his smile turned into laughter. "Things are not always as they seem, apprentice. ShadowClan has light, WindClan has trees, RiverClan warriors are not always beautiful,…and ThunderClan does not always breed loyalty," his tone had returned to it's calm, stillness by the end and Darkpaw knew why.

"So…shall we begin?" Darkpaw asked. The air was getting colder and he recognized the scent of an oncoming rain and there was no protection here.

"Close your eyes," Blackstar said. Darkpaw did. "Extend your claws." Darkpaw did. "Feel the ground beneath you. What does it feel like?"

"It's moist and cold…" Darkpaw said.

"Go on."

"The grass is very thick and matted. The dirt is still pliable underneath. Many small animals could have their dens here."

"What do you hear?" Blackstar asked.

Darkpaw realized for the first time that there was a gentle breeze blowing. It rustled the grass and leaves in the distant trees. The water puddle behind him was stirred up slightly and lapped at the blades of grass in its path. Darkpaw described these things to Blackstar.

"The air, how does it feel to you?" Blackstar asked.

"I can feel the breeze stirring up my coat, but it's wet…heavy. It's going to…" Darkpaw stopped when he sensed something just above his head. He crouched down and opened his eyes, looking up. Blackstar's heavy black paw lowered back down so that it was eye-level with Darkpaw. Darkpaw looked and saw a single drop of water glistening on the surface of the dark fur. It would have landed on his head had Blackstar not caught it.

Blackstar smirked and lowered his paw to the ground. He looked off past Darkpaw and Darkpaw followed his gaze to the tree he had seen him training Windlegs at when she was an apprentice. Rain began peppering the two toms. "Run," Blackstar ordered and the two took off and rain began falling in sheets across the forest.

Both of them were soaked by the time they reached the shelter of the tree. Darkpaw was shivering but Blackstar just laughed. The gentle breeze had turned to howling wind and whipped up the cats' fur and everything else in its path. The rain began to fall horizontally and they were no longer safe beneath the tree.

"Come on!" Blackstar shouted to be heard and began to lead the way back to the forest.

Something bright flashed across the sky, blinding Darkpaw for a moment as a loud noise deafened him. Thunder and lightening, Mudriver had told him about these things. Darkpaw struggled to follow Blackstar, then stopped and looked back at the dump. He had to squint because of the rain. Then, for a reason he did not fully understand, he took off towards the dump.

"DARKPAW!" Blackstar yowled, but Darkpaw did not stop.

He reached the fence and squeezed under, sliding down the small slope, getting mud all over his pelt, but he kept going. Piles of rubbish were everywhere, high as trees. He picked his way around sharp, jutting objects. Lightening flashed in the sky followed by the thunder and for a moment, Darkpaw was amazed at how beautiful it was, but he was called back to his task, whatever it was.

Blackstar raced back and followed Darkpaw into the dump. "DARKPAW!" he shouted again. Darkpaw did not hear him or did not listen and he could see the tabby slowly climbing higher and higher on a rubbish heap. Lightening flashed again and the apprentice seemed oblivious to the danger he was in. Blackstar shot after him, fearing for the kit's life.

Darkpaw neared the top of the heap and looked down. He was very high up. Higher than he remembered ever being before. A strange white container caught his eyes just below on the other side and he began descending to it. Suddenly jaws clamped around his neck and dragged him back. He was terrified for a moment that it would be a rat, but when he was placed down, he saw only Blackstar.

"What are you doing?" Blackstar shouted, "You'll get yourself killed out here!" The lightening flashed and the thunder roared, but Darkpaw did not react. "Come on, we have to get out of here." Blackstar made a reach for Darkpaw again but Darkpaw sprang away.

"No! I have to do something! Something's calling me!" Darkpaw insisted.

"What? That's crazy talk! Let's go!" Blackstar shouted. He made another grab for Darkpaw, but stopped when he heard a soft mewl just before another flash and another roar that would have drowned out the sound. Darkpaw was crawling in the direction it was coming from and Blackstar began to follow.

Darkpaw reached the container first. It was filling fast with water. Bubbles were producing a thick foam on the surface. He lifted himself onto his hind paws and looked in. Struggling to keep their heads above the water were two small kits.

Blackstar appeared beside Darkpaw and looked in. He saw the kits and immediately dunked his head into the water and pulled one out, setting it beside him. Darkpaw struggled to pull out the other kit and placed it beside the other one.

"There's still one in there. At the bottom," he told Blackstar.

Blackstar looked it and saw a small bundle of fur being swirled around by the water, barely visible beneath the foam. Bubbles were slowly rising from the bundle but it did not move.

With a sudden splash, Darkpaw was in the container. The water level had risen and the apprentice was completely submerged before he managed to close his jaws around the nape of the last kitten. He struggled, but finally managed to pull the kit to the surface. Blackstar helped pull it out then helped Darkpaw escape the death trap.

"How are we going to get them back?" Darkpaw asked.

Blackstar thought for a moment. "You run back to camp and find someone to help you. I'll stay here and try to keep them warm," he said finally.

Darkpaw nodded and raced down the rubbish heap. He slipped on his way down, but managed to keep his footing and dropped into the mud. He slithered back out of the dump and raced into the forest.

"Someone! Anyone!" he called as he ran. It was doubtful anyone would be out here at this time, but he had to try. To his surprise, he heard someone call back.

"Hello? Hey, where are you?" came a voice.

"I'm here! Hurry!" Darkpaw shouted.

Tigerstripe emerged from the bushes. "You!" he hissed, "What are you doing out here? Where's Blackstar?"

"He's at the dump. I don't have time to explain, you just have to follow me NOW!" Darkpaw said and prepared to race back to his leader. Lightening flashed and thunder roared, making the forest come alive into a strange beast.

"What's he doing there? Is this some kind of trick?" Tigerstripe snarled.

Darkpaw wheeled around. "Tigerstripe if you don't come with me, kits are gonna die!"

After only a moment more of hesitation, Tigerstripe followed Darkpaw through the forest.

"This way! Come on!" Darkpaw shouted and slipped back into the dump, getting even more mud on his coat but he ignored it. He led Tigerstripe over the rubbish and finally to where Blackstar lay protectively over the kits.

"StarClan…" Tigerstripe whispered.

Blackstar scooped up the biggest kit and stood. "Let's go," he ordered through gritted teeth.

Tigerstripe scooped up the next kit and followed his leader back down.

Darkpaw was left to struggle with the final kit. It was the last he had pulled from the water and, though it was the smallest, the water weighing down its coat and the lack of response it gave made it incredibly difficult for Darkpaw to handle when added to his own small size. He had to settle for dragging the kit after the others.

Tigerstripe and Blackstar reached the bottom first. Blackstar told Tigerstripe to go on ahead and waited for Darkpaw.

When Darkpaw saw Blackstar waiting, he called for him to go on ahead. The lightening flashed and the thunder roared and Blackstar nodded and took off with his tiny charge.

Darkpaw struggled to carry the kit safely down off the rubbish. He was exhausted by the time he reached the ground, but he did not stop. The mud made is easier for him to drag the kit as it was slippery, but it also made it harder to run. Out of the corner of his eye, Darkpaw saw something move. Then he saw a rat poke its head out of a hole.

'_Shit! Not now!' _Darkpaw hissed in his head, but he kept running.

He reached the slope but now the mud worked against him. He could barely climb up with the kit. He managed to shove the kit through the hole in the fence and began struggling up after it. He heard something behind him and glanced back to see a huge rat advancing on him. He scrambled for footing as the ugly, water-soaked creature got closer and closer. One of his hind paws slipped and his claws sliced, accidentally but thankfully, across the rat's face causing it to squeak and fall back. Darkpaw pulled himself through the hole in the fence and scooped up the kit once more.

He raced through the forest, struggling to find places that did not have thorns that would injure his charge. He did not know where he found the strength, but he sprinted all the way into ShadowClan camp, hoisting the kit over the brambles that lined the camp entrance.

Windlegs had been preparing to leave and look for him, but he shoved her back in his haste to get to the medicine cat's den. She followed him as he streaked out of sight into the den.

Darkpaw dragged the kit over to an empty nest and laid it down before falling over onto his side, panting and shivering even as his body fevered from the run. The world seemed to darken as his eyes closed.

Darkpaw woke up to a gentle tongue stroking his neck. He groaned and opened his eyes just a little. By the sound of it, the rain had stopped. It was night, but there was somehow enough light to hurt his eyes and he clamped them shut again with another moan. His whole body hurt and his head felt too big for his body and he didn't think he could move.

"You're awake," a soft voice said.

Darkpaw's head throbbed with every noise and he moaned again. He felt horrible.

"Sorry," the voice whispered and the tongue licked his ear.

"Windlegs?" Darkpaw mumbled.

"Thundertail. Windlegs is asleep. I told her I'd watch over you since I was already here with Mudriver," Thundertail whispered.

Darkpaw suddenly remembered what had happened and his head shot up. "The kits!" he almost shouted.

"Shh," Thundertail soothed and placed a paw on his shoulder to lay him back down. The kits are here. Littlecloud is working on them."

"The smallest one. It was unresponsive. Will it be ok?" Darkpaw asked.

"Sleep now," Thundertail whispered, curling her body around Darkpaw's and laying a paw over him.

"Thundertail…the kit…" Darkpaw tried to protest, but he was so tired, "The kit…" His eyes closed no matter how hard he tried to keep them open.

"Sleep," Thundertail whispered.

Darkpaw had no choice but to obey. His body demanded it no matter how hard he tried to fight it and Littlecloud had given him herbs to keep him drowsy. Darkpaw fell into sleep, dreamless but not restful.

When Darkpaw awoke again, the den was no longer peaceful. Littlecloud was huddled over one of the nests working furiously. Mudriver and Snaketail were watching him intently, though Snaketail seemed significantly less interested than Mudriver was. Thundertail was curled around the two kits in another nest. Only the kits seemed calm.

'_Wait…two?' _Even Darkpaw's tired brain knew that that was wrong. There had been three kits. His heart sank to his stomach as he looked over at the nest Littlecloud was huddled over. He had barely been conscious at the time, but he somehow knew that that was the nest he had placed his charge in. Darkpaw stood up dizzily and staggered over to Littlecloud.

"Darkpaw, don't," Thundertail tried to stop him, but he ignored her.

Darkpaw looked down at the small kit Littlecloud was working on. The older tabby didn't even seem to notice Darkpaw's approach.

Littlecloud was pressing on the kit's chest and licking its throat and nose. There were a small pile of herbs by the tabby's side. "Come on, come on," Littlecloud mumbled. He grabbed the kit's scruff and flipped it onto its stomach and began pressing its back. "Come on!" Littlecloud shouted. It was rare for Littlecloud to loose his composure, but it seemed to have slipped away. Littlecloud rolled the kit onto its back. "Mudriver, if you're able, go get Runningnose. Darkpaw, hold the hind legs up," Littlecloud said without taking his eyes off the kit.

Mudriver ran out and Darkpaw, surprised that Littlecloud knew he was there, grabbed the kit's hind legs in his mouth and lifted them up as Littlecloud had instructed.

Littlecloud lightly tapped the kit's belly with his paw, smearing an herb on the kit's tongue with his other. The kit's body tensed and shuddered. Littlecloud quickly turned its head to the side as water, a strange yellow fluid, and flecks of blood drained from the kit's mouth and nose. "No, no, no!" Littlecloud hissed.

Mudriver came back with Runningnose. Runningnose walked over and looked down at the kit and what had erupted from it. The kit tensed and shuddered again and more of the mixture came out, now with a touch of green.

The former medicine cat pressed his nose to his former apprentice's shoulder. "You can't save this kit," he whispered.

Littlecloud did not stop working. "Yes I can," he growled.

The kit suddenly began convulsing and the grotesque fluid continued flowing from its mouth and nose. Its eyes fluttered then bulged and fluttered again. Darkpaw was forced to release its legs as they twitched and kicked in his mouth. More of the liquid spewed onto the ground and the kit continued to convulse. Its mouth began to froth and blood started to ooze from every opening in its body. Its ears, nose, mouth, eyes, and rear were leaking blood and fowl smelling puss. And still the tiny body shook. It seemed like it would go on forever, like it already had gone on forever.

Darkpaw could only stare in horror at what he was seeing. Out of the corner of his eye, Littlecloud was doing the same thing, mouth agape and eyes glassy.

Runningnose moved, and it seemed to Darkpaw that he moved in slow motion as he took hold of the kit's neck in his jaws and, with a single motion, snapped it. The body lay still, though blood still bubbled onto the nest below and the fowl, yellow liquid splashed out of its mouth one last time.

Darkpaw could hear his heart again and his breathing was loud and ragged. He spun around and raced out of the den. He barely made it to the edge of the camp before he vomited up all that was in his stomach. All he had eaten that day were the herbs Littlecloud had given him but there was some awful, yellow liquid there as well and he vomited again upon seeing it. His body shook as he coughed and hacked, the bitter stuff burning his mouth. He didn't know how long he stood there, staring unseeingly at the mess he had made. Thundertail dropped some wet moss beside him and he thankfully drank from it, desperate to wash the taste from his mouth as though he had swallowed bile again. Thundertail said nothing as he drank, dry-retched a few times, and drank again. When Darkpaw had finished, he pressed himself against Thundertail's chest, trembling beyond belief.

Thundertail did not move until Darkpaw stopped. He stayed pressed against her for a very long time. His legs eventually gave out and she barely caught him before he hit the ground. She lay beside him until his trembling stopped and the steady rise and fall of his chest told her that he had fallen asleep again.

Windlegs exited the medicine cat's den and approached them. "They said he came out here," she explained, looking down at the small body curled up against Thundertail's side.

"Help me carry him inside?" Thundertail asked.

Windlegs did and the two she-cats gently placed Darkpaw back in his nest in the medicine cat's den. Littlecloud was off in the corner, pressed against his former mentor while Runningnose whispered soothing things in his ear. Blackstar had been called in and was currently keeping the surviving kits warm in Thundertail's place. Thundertail and Windlegs, upon Blackstar's order, carried the dead kit, nest and all, out of the den to bury him.

Littlecloud finally seemed to calm down enough to walk over to Blackstar who was sitting at the other end of the den now that Thundertail had returned to care for the kits. "I…I don't know what happened…I just…" Littlecloud stammered, showing that he was still far from ok.

"Littlecloud," Blackstar said, looking concerned for his friend, "just tell me about the other kits. Will they be alright?"

"Yeah I-I think so. They seem ok, but…but I thought…"

"Then they will be put in the care of a she-cat as soon as you see fit to release them." Blackstar pressed his nose against Littlecloud's shoulder. "I know you did all you could. It's not your fault."

"I'll take care of him tonight," Runningnose said when Blackstar looked at him.

Blackstar nodded thankfully and left the den.

"Littlecloud, you need to sleep," Runningnose said.

"No, I have to take care of the rest of my charges," Littlecloud insisted, breaking away.

Runningnose stepped in front of him. "I'll take care of them tonight. You need sleep," Runningnose insisted.

"I've never lost a kit before," Littlecloud whispered, "I mean, not since…and it was never that…"

Runningnose placed some poppy seeds in front of Littlecloud and looked at him sympathetically. "It's never easy," he said gently.

"I hesitated…at the end there I-I-I hesitated…"

"It's to be expected. You've never had to do it before. I pray you will never have to again, but if you do, you'll know what to do. Sleep now," Runningnose said.

Littlecloud looked thankfully at his former mentor and bent to eat the poppy seeds before going to his nest.

Windlegs padded back to the warriors' den after she and Thundertail completed the grizzly task of burying the kit. Tigerstripe was outside waiting for her.

"What happened?" Tigerstripe asked, "Did one of the kits…" he seemed incapable of voicing what he knew to be true.

Windlegs sniffed sadly and nodded. She pressed against her brother for comfort.

"Are the others going to be ok?" he asked.

"I don't know. Littlecloud thinks they will be, but he's not very sure of anything right now," Windlegs said, her voice muffled slightly by Tigerstripe's thick body. "It's a good thing you were out there…Why were you out there?" Windlegs lifted her head and looked into her brother's eyes.

"Come on, you need to get some sleep." Tigerstripe led his sister into the warriors' den and allowed her to curl up closer to him than usual. She was so tired, she did not fight him. She fidgeted and murmured in her sleep but seemed to relax when he pressed closer to her.

When Darkpaw awoke the next morning, he felt greatly improved to the last time he'd woken up. His joy in this fact crumbled, however, when he remembered what had happened when last he woke. Looking around, he saw that Mudriver was nowhere to be seen. Confused, he stood, preparing to look for him. He suddenly became very dizzy and would have collapsed had there not been someone suddenly at his side to support him.

"You're in no condition to be going anywhere right now, Darkpaw," Littlecloud said, easing the apprentice back into his nest.

"Where's Mudriver?" Darkpaw asked.

"I released him this morning. He'll be sore for a couple of days, but otherwise just fine. You, however, managed to get sick with all that swimming you did in the two-leg dump. You'll be fine, but you need to take it easy, just for today," Littlecloud said.

Darkpaw groaned. "Really? But Blackstar was just as wet as me and he's not in here."

"Blackstar's older and didn't go diving into dirty water," Littlecloud pointed out.

Darkpaw sighed and rested his head on his front paws.

"It was a brave thing you did, though. You upheld the warrior code saving that kit," Littlecloud said softly.

"I didn't save that kit. If I had, there'd be three kits curled up over there instead of two," Darkpaw growled, angry with himself. He was certain he could have done more for the kit, but couldn't quite place what.

"You can't blame yourself for that, Darkpaw. You did everything you could." These were almost the exact same words Runningnose had told Littlecloud just earlier that same morning, but that just made them truer.

"I don't feel like I did," Darkpaw mumbled.

"That's just how it feels when you first see someone die. It's a stage of innocence you never get back. It's just too bad you had to lose it when you were so young," Littlecloud sighed.

Darkpaw had been tense throughout Littlecloud's entire speech. "S-seeing someone die?"

"Yes. It's like the first time you draw blood in battle. It changes you," Littlecloud said, oblivious to how rigid Darkpaw had suddenly become.

"Oh…" Darkpaw thought back to the real first time he had undergone these changes. He hadn't even been the age of a normal apprentice.

Littlecloud went off to take care of something. Darkpaw was pretty sure he said what it was, but he hadn't been listening.

"I can't believe I have to share a den with you, again," came a harsh voice.

Darkpaw lifted his head and turned to see the other occupant of the den. "Oh, Snaketail, I though I smelled carrion," he shot back.

"Filthy rouge, taking up the medicine cat's time," Snaketail snorted.

"It's only for the day. Can't you be bitter after I've left?" Darkpaw was truly not in the mood to deal with Snaketail today. He was, as a rule, never in the mood to deal with her, but today was especially brutal and having her around never helped anything.

"Why should I spare you any luxury? You should have left a long time ago or been drowned. Now you're off killing kits," Snaketail hissed with particular malice most warriors saved for their enemies.

Darkpaw felt all his rage bubbling to the surface. His claws extended and he was sure he could spring on Snaketail and rip her throat out whether he was dizzy or not. He opened his mouth to scream at her, but it wasn't his voice that cut through the den.

"SHUT THE FUCK UP, YOU LOUSY, SOCIOPATHIC BITCH!"

Darkpaw and Snaketail both turned to the den entrance where they were surprised to see Thundertail, bristling and growling, as she stalked towards them, eyes filled with hatred that even Snaketail could never manage.

Snaketail managed to regain her composure, miraculously, under Thundertail's glare. "Well, speaking of kits that should have been drowned. I told my sister that you and your brother were no good. I warned her that your father was related to Brokenstar, and there's my proof." Snaketail jerked her head at Thundertail's crooked, yellow tail which was lashing back and forth angrily. "Worthless cat, I'm ashamed to call you my kin. You and your no good brother."

"If anyone needs to be drowned, it's you. It's stupid, worthless trash like you that are the reason ShadowClan has our reputation. You say you hate the way the other clans look down on us, but you're the fucking cause of it!" Thundertail raged.

Neither she-cat was paying any attention to Darkpaw now, who was still laying quietly in his nest. Had they looked at him, they would have seen confusion written across the stunned tabby's face. He wasn't surprised at Thundertail's temper. He knew the she-cat had a fire that could burn the forest to the ground. He was surprised about what Snaketail had said about Thundertail and Mudriver's mother, her sister. Snaketail, Thundertail and Mudriver were kin. Darkpaw's heart sank into his stomach.

"I'm not the cause of anything, bitch. I have pride in my clan. It's outlanders like him," Snaketail pointed at Darkpaw with her tail, though still neither she-cat looked at him, "that are the cause."

"You and my mother were…" Thundertail suddenly stopped. She closed her eyes and sighed.

Snaketail smirked, thinking she had won.

Without looking up or opening her eyes, Thundertail spoke again, this time much softer. "When will you be released from here?" she asked.

"What's that got to do with anything?" Snaketail hissed.

"I want to know." Thundertail's voice was measured and much too calm.

"Littlecloud didn't say. He's not sure when my legs will heal. That disgusting brother of yours nearly ripped them off."

"One can dream," Thundertail mumbled. She opened her eyes and looked back at Snaketail.

Darkpaw caught a glimpse of the rage that still hadn't subsided behind the yellow pools. The intensity of it shocked him.

"What did you say?" Snaketail hissed.

Thundertail stepped forward so that she was now leering down at Snaketail, their noses nearly touching. Again, Snaketail, proud as she was, looked completely helpless as she stared up at the younger warrior. One thing, and one thing alone, seemed to be keeping Thundertail from slicing apart her mother's sister right there: Darkpaw was alive and unharmed. Had Snaketail laid a paw on the tabby apprentice, it would have been the last thing she ever did, and Snaketail knew it.

Thundertail and Mudriver had never fit in with the rest of the clan. Why they didn't was obvious to everyone, they didn't want to. If the clan went right, they went left. If the clan went left, they went right. They depended only on each other. The two had been very close to their parents and had been heartbroken when their parents were killed in the battle against BloodClan. They had, in fact, witnessed it happen right in front of them. The rouges had torn the two warriors to shreds when they had gotten in the way of their real targets, the two ShadowClan apprentices that had been fighting side-by-side but otherwise alone. The first and last time Mudriver and Thundertail killed another cat was on that day. While one of the rouges had been taken out by their mother, the one that ultimately orphaned them had intended to massacre the rest of the family. He had not made it very far before his throat was sliced open.

One thing was very well known about Thundertail and Mudriver, they were fiercely loyal. Their loyalty would not have been out of place in ThunderClan. They perhaps could even surpass the finest ThunderClan warrior. They had been loyal to their parents, and that rouge had died brutally because of it. They were loyal to ShadowClan, and two more rouges had died and many more were injured because of that. Now, they were loyal to Darkpaw, and they'd be damned if Snaketail came close to him again, kin or not.

Snaketail hissed in pain as Thundertail's paw pressed down on the cobwebs bandaging her hips. "You stupid retch, that hurts!" Snaketail protested.

"My brother told you very clearly that attacks against Darkpaw would not be permitted. He vowed to kill you if you tried anything again. We are cats of our word, Snaketail. Now I did not make that promise, but I have no problems taking care of it in my brother's absence. You've already dug yourself in deep because you hurt him, do you really want to make it worse on yourself?" Thundertail's voice was still deathly calm and the look she was giving Snaketail was intense. Her claws unsheathed and re-opened the wounds on Snaketail's hips. Snaketail hissed again and Thundertail released her, leaning up but not taking her eyes off the other she-cat.

Littlecloud walked in and smelled the blood. He rushed over and saw that Snaketail was bleeding. "What happened?" he asked.

Thundertail shrugged, "I told her not to move, that she'd irritate her wounds. You know she never listens." Thundertail curled back up with the two small kits. "Oh, and Snaketail."

"What?" Snaketail grunted, scowling at Thundertail as Littlecloud worked to replace the bandages on her legs.

"My mother may have been your sister, but neither my brother nor I are related to you in any way. As far as we are concerned, you have no kin," Thundertail said. Her voice was thick with false sweetness, but the expression in her eyes never changed and she sent through a message that Darkpaw recognized. _'Next time, I will kill you.'_…

**A message to you, the reader: No one in this story is safe from angst or injury and very VERY few are safe from death. If this chapter made you want to puke (or actually made you puke) or cry: then hurray I did a great job! If not and you just want to hurl something at me for being a terrible author: …well darn. Reviews make Darkpaw happy, but don't necessarily keep anyone alive. Also, the descriptions of the kits will be in the next chapter.**


	25. Chapter 24

**Stormkit- grey and white she-cat.**

**Clawkit- cream colored tom with a dark brown stripe down his back.**

Darkpaw felt overwhelmingly restless as he lounged about in his nest in Littlecloud's den. Mudriver and Thundertail both had warrior duties to attend to and couldn't keep him company. He wasn't sure where Windlegs was, but figured if she wasn't busy then Tigerstripe would be dragging her off somewhere to keep her away from him. That or she just didn't want to see him. He figured anything was possible by now. Snaketail was too busy sleeping or grumbling about her legs to spend much energy berating Darkpaw and Littlecloud was spending most of his time working over the new kits.

Thankfully, the kits did not need a she-cat's milk anymore. While they didn't speak, he had determined that they were three moons old. The kits seemed to be in shock, not even noticing the absence of their sibling and hardly realizing the presence of each other. Darkpaw wanted to see them, but he was worried that he might get them sick even though Littlecloud had assured him he wasn't contagious. They had yet to be named and if they had had any names before their ordeal, they weren't telling.

Blackstar entered the den a little after sun high. He nodded his head at the other occupants of the den before walking over to Littlecloud who was fussing over the little tom-kit. "Darkflower is pregnant. She said she is willing to care for the kits until they are ready to be made apprentices," Blackstar said, looking over Littlecloud's shoulder at the kits.

"That's good. We're keeping them, then?" Littlecloud said, not looking up from his work.

"I don't see that we have any other choice." Darkpaw could swear he saw Blackstar's eyes flash over to him for just a moment before he looked back down at the nest. "Have they said anything?"

Littlecloud shook his head. "They seem to be traumatized by their ordeal and I don't suppose all the new surroundings and faces are helping much. I've tried coaxing them into response, but they're locked up tight in their heads. They won't even acknowledge each other." The medicine cat looked a little down-hearted and worried and again Darkpaw could swear he saw the flash of eyes on him.

With a loud yawn, Snaketail woke from another one of her many naps. She shot a glare at Darkpaw before looking over at Littlecloud and Blackstar, both of whom had their backs turned to where Darkpaw and Snaketail were laying. "What are they going to do with those kits?" she asked Darkpaw.

Darkpaw stared at her for a long moment.

"What, have you gone dumb?" Snaketail hissed.

Darkpaw stayed quiet for a few moments longer before he finally spoke. "Why do you ask stupid questions, Snaketail? Of course Blackstar is going to keep the kits. A she-cat has already said she'd be willing to care for them which is more than could be said for you," he growled quietly.

"You're different than they are," Snaketail hissed.

Darkpaw didn't ask 'how' because, even if she couldn't fully understand it, what Snaketail had said was true. He was different in more ways than she was thinking.

Snaketail didn't seem to notice his silence because she went on, "And besides, it's not like I'm jumping at the opportunity to take in more strays, either."

Darkpaw rolled his eyes and put his head down, no longer interested in the conversation.

"So aside from their silence, would you say they are healthy?" Blackstar asked.

"I'm not sure. They seem fine, but without some sort of response from them, I can't be a hundred percent on it and I won't feel comfortable releasing them until then," Littlecloud said.

"So how do we make them talk?"

"I have no idea. I've never had to deal with this problem before. The only kit I've ever seen who didn't talk was Darkpaw."

Both toms turned and looked at the apprentice who had stopped listening to the conversation. Blackstar glanced at Littlecloud before approaching Darkpaw's nest.

"What are you doing?" Littlecloud asked.

"Testing a theory," Blackstar answered before stepping up behind Darkpaw and tapping the apprentice's shoulder with his paw.

Darkpaw seemed mildly startled before looking up at his leader. "What is it, Blackstar?" he asked.

"I want you to do something, Darkpaw," the white tom said calmly.

"What is it?" Darkpaw gave Blackstar a suspicious look.

"I want you to go into the nursery-"

"Why?" Darkpaw asked, moving back slightly, his limbs pressing close to his body defensively.

"I want you to take the kits there and see if you can get them to speak with you. No one is in there, you'll be fine," Blackstar assured the frightened tabby.

"Littlecloud can't do it?" Darkpaw protested.

There was a soft snicker and none of the toms had to look to tell it was coming from Snaketail.

Blackstar ignored the she-cat and continued, "I don't think he can handle the situation as well as you might be able to. Please, Darkpaw."

Darkpaw looked from his leader to the kits and back again. "I might get them sick," he said though it was clear his resolve was breaking.

"You won't. Darkpaw, I realize this makes you uncomfortable, but I must insist that you do this."

Darkpaw held the leader's gaze for a long while before giving in. He stood from his nest and approached the kits.

Blackstar and Littlecloud each picked one up and carried them ahead of Darkpaw as they walked into the nursery. Setting the kits down in a small nest, the two older toms left the den, leaving Darkpaw alone with the kits.

Darkpaw glanced around at the nursery, his fur prickling. When he was younger, the nursery had seemed so huge and overwhelming with its wide walls and high ceiling. The ceiling still seemed high, but now the walls felt suffocating. He looked back down at the kits, eyes closed, curled up, still, but somehow not peaceful. He leaned down and inspected them. The she-kit's sides were rising and falling much too quickly for sleep and the tom-kit's eyes were half-open and moving side to side frantically. The tabby sat back and sighed, not knowing how to start or what to do.

Finally, he cleared his throat. "Um, kits? Kits, wake up," he said as gently as he could though it was very obvious he wasn't used to speaking this way.

The she-kit opened her eyes, but the tom-kit's remained half-shut though they stopped darting to and fro. The she-kit did not look at Darkpaw or her brother, but instead stared at some spot between Darkpaw's front paws. Darkpaw lifted his paw and waved it back and forth in front of where she was looking, trying to get some sort of movement, but her eyes remained trained where they were. Darkpaw placed his paw back down and sighed, turning his attention to the tom-kit. The tom did not raise his head like his sister and had instead chosen to just stare blankly at whatever was in his line of sight with the way his head was angled.

Watching their blank stares and lack of response to movement, Darkpaw feared they might be blind. He closed his eyes and took in everything he could from the kits' life signatures, but found absolutely nothing wrong with their eyes. Checking again, he found their ears just as normal. Littlecloud had mentioned needing to clear a white, sandy substance from their eyes and ears, but it didn't seem to be causing any severe effects and if it was, Darkpaw couldn't see it. Darkpaw looked at the tom-kit again and found he had closed his eyes, but the she-kit was still staring at something invisible.

Curiosity hit Darkpaw as did a new idea. He lowered himself down until he was laying on the nursery floor and was eye-level with the she-kit, staring straight into her eyes. They were blood-shot and glassy and Darkpaw wondered whether it was lack of rest, or the sandy material that had been in her eyes that was the cause. They had just turned from blue to green and Darkpaw thought he could see streaks of amber working their way into them.

She stared back at him without seeming to really see him until he blinked. When he blinked, she did too and tilted her head to the side, the slightest hints of an expression beginning to form on her face.

"I need you to talk to me. Please, you have to talk. I know it's better in there, but you have to come out. I won't hurt you." Darkpaw paused for a moment. "I swear to you I will not hurt you. I want to help you. That's what this place is for. It's a sanctuary for kits like you and your brother are and like I…was."

The she-kit tilted her head further to the side, her eyes narrowing slightly as though she were trying to hear Darkpaw from a far away place.

"Come to me, little kit from the storm. Follow me," Darkpaw coaxed, feeling as though he had entered the she-kit's mind just by staring into her eyes.

The she-kit's eyes suddenly snapped open wide and she straightened her neck. "Storm!" she cried and looked about wildly. Her eyes settled on Darkpaw and she cried out again, leaping over her brother and running into the wall of the nursery. She clawed at the leaves, pulling herself several inches up the wall before it gave out and she slid back to the floor. She glanced back and Darkpaw and began desperately trying to race up it again. Giving up, she pressed herself against it, staring at him, wide-eyed and shaking.

Darkpaw stood slowly and tried to approach, but she just darted to the other side of the nursery, seeming blind to the exit. "It's ok," Darkpaw said, taking steps towards her again.

"No! No! Monster!" she cried, pressing harder against the wall and turning her face into it as though willing it to become the comforting flank of her mother.

Darkpaw froze in his tracks and stared at her. She glanced over her shoulder at him a couple of times before burying herself into imaginary fur again, muttering to herself things that sounded like 'help' and 'monster'. Darkpaw looked her up and down, her trembling shoulders and legs, her sharp hips jutting out of her back with her spine and all-too-clear ribcage, all visible beneath thick, grey fur. The white on her paws had become dirty from attempting her escape. Darkpaw continued to study her for a few seconds more before walking out of the nursery.

Darkpaw padded towards the fresh kill pile, the cold air stinging his lungs and nose.

"Darkpaw, is everything alright?" Blackstar asked, approaching the apprentice.

"Fine. Has Speckledthorn hunted today?" Darkpaw asked, looking over the dead prey.

"He should be returning shortly from a hunting patrol any minute now, why?"

"Please, bring me something he killed. You don't have to come in, just set it by the entrance, ok?" Darkpaw didn't wait for an answer and walked back to the nursery.

Blackstar gave the tabby a strange look, but did as he requested once Speckledthorn had returned.

Darkpaw was sitting in the middle of the nursery, watching the she-kit who was now frozen with her face pressed against the wall of the nursery. He could smell the torn prey and padded out to get it, thanking Blackstar for it before returning inside. A loud growl escaped the she-kit's stomach and her ears perked up when Darkpaw entered. Upon closer inspection, he could see her nose twitching. Setting the prey down, Darkpaw began to speak.

"Speckledthorn always complains about his hunting abilities, but I think they might be just what I need to get you out of this. He's a bit of a sloppy hunter, but torn prey is always more fragrant and it's fresh. I'm sure you can smell it from wherever you are. Come on out and have some. I doubt you've had anything this good before. It's dead so it won't hurt you." Darkpaw spoke slowly and softly to the she-kit's turned shoulder.

Suddenly, she turned her head to look at him. Her eyes darted over Darkpaw's face before settling on the rabbit at his paws. Her nose twitched several more times and she almost made a move towards him, before she shrunk back again and stared at him.

"You're afraid, I know. You aren't seeing what's really here. I don't know what you're seeing, but I know from experience that it's never pleasant. If you'd just come over here and eat something, it would make it better. Come on, I promise nothing will hurt you."

The she-kit eyed him suspiciously. Then her eyes were drawn to the prey again and a small mewl escaped her.

Darkpaw suddenly got another idea. Once she mewled, he moved the rabbit a little closer.

She cringed at first, but then relaxed back into her regular tense position.

"You have to make some sort of communication to me if you want it," Darkpaw said. He glanced over at the small tom. There was slight movement from the tom's nose, but he was otherwise still out and Darkpaw turned his attention back to the she-kit. "If I can just get you, maybe you can help me with your brother. If it weren't for your cries, I never would have been able to save you. Come on, let me save you again." This wasn't exactly true. He didn't know how he had known the kits were in danger.

The she-kit mewled again and Darkpaw moved closer. She cringed, then relaxed and then mewled again. This cycle continued until Darkpaw was right in front of her. She had turned to face him completely now and was staring hungrily at the rabbit. Darkpaw stopped just out of her reach.

"You have to speak if you want it. Come on. I know you can," Darkpaw said, placing a paw in front of the kit to block her off from it.

She mewled, but he did not move. She tried again, but still he would not move. She mewled several more times, each time getting louder, but still he wouldn't move. She let out a loud, angry yowl and, though Darkpaw was amused, he stayed where he was. She tried to take a step forward to get it, but he blocked her with his paw. She looked up at him and hissed.

"Speak, kit, I don't want to starve you. I've been there, but you have to speak to me," Darkpaw said.

She hissed again and made an attempt to bite his paw, but he shooed her away gently.

"Speak," Darkpaw said again.

"Give it!" she whined and dove forward again. This time, her jaws clamped shut on sweet rabbit flesh instead of the tabby. She began eating quickly and Darkpaw had to struggle to keep her from choking herself. Once she had eaten as much as she could, her eyes drooped closed and she fell asleep, nearly collapsing though Darkpaw caught her and placed her back beside her brother.

Darkpaw sighed in satisfaction before turning to the tom-kit. The little tom was fast asleep, though he cuddled into his sister's warm body when she was placed beside him. Feeling hungry himself, Darkpaw finished off the rabbit. He would get the tom warm prey when he woke up.

Darkpaw knew he wouldn't be able to sleep in the nursery, but he didn't want to leave the kits alone so he curled up at the other end and laid his head on his paws. He felt something sticking into his stomach and stood to inspect it. He saw a pathetic pile of old, dry leaves and twigs and smirked. It was the 'nest' he had made for himself as a kit. He had instinctively returned to the place he had felt safest all those moons ago in this prison. As memories began to rise to the surface his smile fell and his fur began to prickle and he swiped the old bedding away, causing it to shatter and mix in with the dirt. He glared around the nursery before laying down once again and watching for the kits to wake up.

/

The she-kit was the first to wake. She stirred and mewled before opening her eyes. She looked around in confusion at the nursery before her eyes settled on Darkpaw. Startled, she tried to back up, but tripped over the body of her brother. Again startled, she jumped out of the nest and lowered her body close to the ground.

"Wh-who are you?" she asked Darkpaw.

Darkpaw remained where he was and looked steadily back at her, trying to remain nonthreatening. "My name is Darkstripepaw," he said softly. He wanted to ask her some questions as well, but decided to wait until she had all of her questions out first.

"Where am I?" she asked looking around the nursery, then her eyes grew wide and she focused back on Darkpaw, "Am I dead?"

"No, at least, I don't think so. I'm certain that I'm alive and so I would assume if you are here with me then you must be alive as well," he said.

The she-kit looked at the sleeping tom-kit. "Who…Who's that? H-he seems familiar," she stammered.

"He's your brother. Well, at least I'm pretty sure he's your brother. We found you together. You don't remember?"

The she-kit shook her head. "Who's 'we'?"

"You are in ShadowClan right now. My leader and I found you and your brother," Darkpaw paused, debating whether or not to mention the third kit, "There was a storm and you were going to drown so my leader and I with the help of another warrior saved you and brought you back here."

"Where's our mother?" she asked.

"I don't know. When we found you, you were alone. We don't know where you came from." Darkpaw was starting to feel really bad for the little kits. Completely alone without any parents, left to die and not even knowing where they came from. At least _he_ had more back-story than _that_.

The she-kit looked at the other kit that was now identified as her brother. She walked over to him and tried to shake him awake, having no progress. "Why won't he wake up?" she asked.

"You were very sick when we brought you here. I don't think he's recovered yet. I was hoping you'd be able to help me with him. Do you know his name?"

The she-kit shook her head. "I don't even know my name," she said.

Darkpaw nodded, he hadn't thought she would. "I'm going to go get something to eat, it helped me wake you. Maybe he just needs to eat as well. Will you be ok until I get back? I won't be gone long," Darkpaw promised.

The she-kit nodded her head and began licking her brother's ear.

Darkpaw exited the nursery again into the dark, cold camp. He padded over to the fresh kill pile and, for the first time, discovered it completely empty. He hissed in annoyance and pondered what to do. He had promised the she-kit he wouldn't be gone long and he wasn't sure how long it would take him to find a piece of prey. He decided to go tell Blackstar of his progress before anything else.

"Blackstar?" he called into the dark den.

"Come in," came the leaders voice and Darkpaw cautiously entered. "Hello, Darkpaw. Come to tell me of your progress?" Blackstar asked.

Darkpaw nodded. "The she-kit is awake, but the tom isn't. I think he needs to eat," Darkpaw explained.

"Well done, Darkpaw. Do they have names?"

"Not that the she-cat remembers. She can't really remember anything that happened to them before. Would you like to try speaking with her? I could go hunting while you do. The fresh kill pile is empty and I'd feel bad since it'd be the second piece I take," Darkpaw explained. He left out that he had finished off what the she-kit hadn't eaten. Technically speaking, he probably wasn't supposed to.

"If she's as traumatized as you say, introducing her to another, bigger, tom wouldn't be helpful right now. I'll take care of getting them a meal, you try to get what you can out of her," Blackstar said.

Darkpaw dipped his head and ran out of the den.

"Did you get food?" the she-kit asked when he returned.

"There is no prey right now. But don't worry, someone is getting some. How is he?" Darkpaw asked, gesturing towards the tom-kit.

"He made some weird noises earlier, but nothing other than that. It's kind of creepy because his eyes are always a little bit open," she said.

Darkpaw took a few steps closer to get a better look, but he noticed her suddenly tense up and backed away again. "I'll take your word for it," he said instead. He understood her wariness of him, but it didn't really bother him. She wasn't scared of who he was. He could have been anyone she didn't know, really, and she would behave the same way.

The she-kit shot him and quick smile before going back to her brother. They sat in a comfortable silence until someone called from the entrance. The she-kit tensed again and her fur rose all along her spine leading to her bristling tail.

"It's ok," Darkpaw assured her, unsure of how convincing he was. "I know who it is. You just wait here, they probably brought food." Darkpaw stood and left her there.

Thundertail was waiting for him at the den entrance. "Hey, kit, how's it going with the little ones? Blackstar said you were making progress with one of them," she said cheerfully, a small dead mouse at her paws.

Darkpaw stared at Thundertail for a moment. "Yes, I am. Would you like to come inside and see them?" he asked.

Thundertail cocked her head to the side. "Um, are you sure that's a good idea? Blackstar said they were skittish."

"They are, but you need to trust me. See, as kits, they'd want their mother. We don't have their mother and I'm hardly a replacement. I was wondering if you might be able to come in and help me calm them down. Maybe you could get closer to them than I can," Darkpaw explained.

"You have a point, but I have a better idea. Wait here, ok." With that, Thundertail bounded off towards the warriors' den.

She returned a few minutes later with another black she-cat behind her. "Since Darkflower's the one who's going to be in charge of taking care of the kits, why not have her help you out?" Thundertail suggested once they had reached him.

'_Because I know you better and Darkflower scares me a little bit,' _Darkpaw thought, but he nodded agreement with Thundertail. Darkflower picked up the mouse Thundertail had brought and gestured for Darkpaw to go ahead inside. Darkpaw took a deep breath and reentered the nursery.

The she-kit looked up when she heard Darkpaw approaching. When she saw he was being followed, she ducked down behind her brother, though it did little to hide her since she was bigger than he was.

"It's ok. This is Darkflower. She's the one who's going to be taking care of you and your brother. She won't hurt you," Darkpaw said.

The she-kit poked her head up and examined the new she-cat. She finally worked up the courage to stand and looked at the prey Darkflower was carrying. Seeing the she-kit relax, Darkflower approached slowly and placed the prey beside the tom-kit. Darkpaw hung back and watched.

Darkflower gently began coaxing the tom to open his eyes. He sniffed and turned his head towards the prey. Darkflower ripped off a piece and held it close to his mouth, allowing him to take in the rich aroma. The tom's eyes flew open and he hungrily snatched up the food. Darkflower pushed forward the rest of the mouse and the tom dove in, eating most of it.

The tom looked up at Darkflower and smiled, then his eyes began to droop as the fullness of his belly caught up with him. He pressed against Darkflower's flank and fell asleep. The she-kit stood close to her brother, but didn't seem to quite trust Darkflower enough to be very near, yet.

"Who hurt you?" Darkpaw thought out loud.

The she-kit turned to him and cocked her head to the side. Darkflower gave him a questioning look as well.

"No one is born that afraid. When you first woke up, you were wild in fear. Someone came after you and hurt you badly before we found you. It probably wasn't your father because you'd be much more afraid of me if it was and it wasn't your mother because you'd be cowering away from Darkflower right now if it was. I know what happens to kits that are hurt by parents, but you don't really seem to fit in with a kit abused by a parent. I was just wondering who or what hurt you and frightened you so much," Darkpaw explained.

The she-kit looked at her paws. "I can't remember," she said.

"You probably don't need to anyway. Memories aren't always a great thing to have," Darkpaw said.

/

The tom-kit woke up almost an hour later. Darkflower had not left his side and was curled around him. He looked at her in confusion and then around the nursery before settling on Darkpaw, much as his sister had done.

"Who…Where…What's going on?" he cried, waking Darkflower from a very light snooze.

"You're alright, little one," she said, wrapping her tail gently around him.

Darkpaw lifted his head and was about to explain everything once again, but the she-kit stepped in instead.

"We're in the nursery of ShadowClan and that's Darkflower and Darkstripepaw. Darkflower's gonna take care of us and Darkstripepaw helped us because we were drowning…" she began in a whisper.

"Are we dead? Who are we?" the tom-kit interrupted, his anxiety growing so much his fur was standing on end so he was as big as his sister.

"We aren't dead and…I don't really know who we are anyway. No one does. But I think you're my brother," the she-kit said. Her voice was very solemn for a kit, but Darkpaw understood how stress could cause the abnormality.

"I-I don't have a name?" the tom asked.

"I'll name you," Darkflower said. The tom looked up at her curiously.

"That's what mothers do," Darkpaw said quietly. "Since we don't know the names your mother gave you, Darkflower will do it." The kits looked at him but said nothing. The she-kit rarely seemed to talk unless asking a question and, as she had 'relaxed', it had become more necessary to coax whatever it was she was going to say out of her. Now seemed to be one of those times. Darkpaw could tell she wanted to ask a question by the way she was kneading the ground, a habit that had recently surfaced while her brother slept.

"It's alright. You can speak," Darkflower said soothingly. She had proven to be more capable of getting answers from the kit than Darkpaw.

"I just…well what are you gonna name us?" she asked quietly. The tom-kit nodded in agreement, clearly the same question had been on his mind.

Darkflower smiled and thought for a moment. "How about Clawkit for you," she said, licking the stripe down the tom's back affectionately before looking back at the she-kit and thinking again.

Darkpaw saw the amount of care Darkflower had put into the simple gesture and felt a craving for it. He wondered what would have happened if Snaketail had been so warm about having him as her charge. "Um, c-can I put in a suggestion for her?" Darkpaw asked quietly. Darkflower was being gentle with the kits, but he had never truly gotten the opportunity to know how she would react to him.

Darkflower looked at him for a long moment and Darkpaw could feel his fur prickling under her gaze. Experience had taught him that having a conversation with any ShadowClan aside from Mudriver, Thundertail, Blackstar, Littlecloud, and Runningnose could end disastrously. Darkflower's gaze was cold on him, she didn't like him but it didn't feel like she hated him. Finally, she nodded and Darkpaw let out a breath he hadn't known he was holding.

"Well, the first word she said to me was storm and I figured since we got her during a storm, why not call her Stormkit?" he said carefully. He didn't want to sound demanding. He wasn't terrified of Darkflower, but he didn't think she'd hesitate in ripping him apart.

"Stormkit," Darkflower repeated then looked at the she-kit, "Do you like it?"

The she-kit nodded slowly.

"Very well, your names are Clawkit and Stormkit. What's your question?" Stormkit had been kneading the ground again and Darkflower noticed.

Stormkit laid her ears flat against her head and looked down shyly.

"Come on. I can't explain what you don't understand if you don't tell me," Darkflower said. She wasn't known for being patient, but the fact that she had been a mother before was obvious.

"How come…well Darkstripepaw's name is different," she said.

Darkflower looked at Darkpaw then back at Stormkit, looking for a way to phrase the explanation.

"Are you guys related?" Clawkit blurted, then pressed close to his sister uncertainly.

"StarClan no!" Darkflower said quickly and a little louder than normal.

Darkpaw took his turn to look down at his paws, suddenly wishing he'd never agreed to come back in here all over again.

Darkflower did not notice Darkpaw's reaction, but she did notice how frightened the kits got at her raised voice. "I'm sorry," she said softly, "No, we aren't related. I'll explain how names work here and then we can talk about why…"

"I'm so different," Darkpaw finished for her. "I don't think you need me anymore, Darkflower. If you do, you can send for me. I'm going to go." He stood from where he lay a good distance from the kits and queen.

"Send Littlecloud in here to check them out tomorrow," was all Darkflower said before Darkpaw left the nursery.

The camp was fairly quiet even though there were still many cats bustling about. Darkpaw walked into Littlecloud's den, but froze at the entrance when he heard Littlecloud talking with someone.

"I just don't think you'll ever fully recover from those wounds and without the proper use of your hind legs, I don't see how much help you can be," came Littlecloud's voice.

"You stupid fur ball, you're wrong! It's not me that's the problem, it's your idiotic treatments! You're no good as a medicine cat! You'd condemn a perfectly good warrior to…to…"

Littlecloud cut off the she-cat's voice. "It isn't my fault, Snaketail. The damage Mudriver did is simply irreparable. I'm not saying you're a weak warrior. It's ultimately up to Blackstar to decide if you won't, but how do you expect to hunt or fight with your hind legs as damaged at they are? That is assuming you don't get an infection and die with how much you've been picking at your bandages."

"You don't know how to tie them right. They irritate me," Snaketail snapped. "And you act as if my legs have been torn off."

"I could see the bone!" Littlecloud cried, "Snaketail, the fact that I managed to keep you alive at all is nothing short of a miracle from StarClan!"

"And you can't figure out how to fix a simple flesh wound like that," Snaketail grumbled.

"Snaketail, warriors have died from less than what you've gotten. I understand that you want to serve your clan still but-"

"Do you? Do you really understand?" Snaketail cut in, "You abandoned your warrior duties to become a medicine cat. Right when ShadowClan needed our warriors you-"

"ENOUGH!" Littlecloud shouted so loud all the cats in the clearing heard and looked towards the nursery.

Darkpaw was trembling. He could tell what Littlecloud was telling Snaketail to do, where he wanted Snaketail to go. "StarClan, please, no. Heal her if you must, but don't make her an elder," he prayed silently.

Blackstar didn't see Darkpaw in the shade of the den entrance as he entered to see what had gotten Littlecloud so worked up. Littlecloud was glaring down at Snaketail, aggression that wasn't allowed to be released coming off of him in waves.

"What's going on?" Blackstar asked.

"This moron wants to send me to be an elder. He says my legs will never work right again," Snaketail growled.

"It's not that I _want_ to send her to the elders' den, but Blackstar, she's a senior warrior, she'd be heading there in a few moons anyway. ShadowClan is not under any threat right now and even if we were, how could we use her? She's hardly even able to walk, much less run or fight or even defend herself. I've done all I can for her, you know I have, but there are some things that just can't be helped. She'll be recognized as a good and strong warrior who…" Littlecloud trailed off.

"Who what? Got her legs ripped apart by a worthless reject that was defending an even more worthless bastard?" Snaketail snapped.

"Now, Snaketail, that doesn't have to be mentioned. It can simply be said that you chose to join Runningnose in the elders' den. Snaketail, it is not a shameful thing to become an elder," Blackstar said.

"Yeah? Well if it's so great, why don't you do it?" Snaketail asked sarcastically. "Blackstar, don't make me give up…"

Darkpaw had to strain to hear, but he could have sworn there was something in Snaketail's voice that he had never heard before. Vulnerability. She seemed almost terrified of not being a warrior anymore. At that moment, Darkpaw changed his mind and wished with all his heart that Blackstar would make her an elder. Just once, he wanted her to be the vulnerable, frightened one and he would get to see it. But at the same time, she wasn't the type of cat to show her weakness. An almost perfect ShadowClan warrior, she would still act as she had before to him, possibly even worse. She would not fall apart, she would just become worse. Her kits and mate had all died, her only living kin had abandoned her, as far as Darkpaw knew, she didn't really have any close friends, but still she remained strong. If he had to care for her, it would be like the nursery all over again. Memories of his three moons in Hell flooded back to him and he felt he might be sick.

"I'm sorry, Snaketail. I truly am," Blackstar began.

Darkpaw spun around and bolted out of the camp, passing by Mudriver and Thundertail blindly. He raced through the forest in the dark cold, his paws beginning to hurt as they slammed the frozen ground, but he kept going. When he finally did stop and look around, he realized where his paws had taken him of their own accord yet again and sighed, stepping towards the gnarled tree that had spawned so many others, his paws trembling beneath him.

/

"Blackstar, wait. It's still early. Maybe, maybe the moron is wrong. Maybe I'll heal. Can't we wait, just a little longer?" Snaketail said.

Blackstar looked at his medicine cat and sighed. Littlecloud was almost never wrong and even Blackstar could see that Snaketail's legs would never work properly again even if she could use them. But Snaketail, infuriating as she may be, was his warrior and she was prideful. If there was some chance she could make it, he might as well let her try. "I will give you until the next gathering. If Littlecloud does not think you are strong enough still, them I'm afraid you will have to go to the elders' den," he said.

"That's more than enough time. After all, if that half-face bitch from ThunderClan can still be a warrior, why can't I?" Snaketail said proudly.

Blackstar gave Littlecloud a sympathetic look. "Where's Darkpaw? Is he still in the nursery?" he asked suddenly.

"I don't know, but if he is, could you send him in here? I need to check and make sure he'll be well enough to train tomorrow," Littlecloud said.

Blackstar nodded and exited the den…

**I'm just gonna say it, I hate this chapter. HATE IT! Why? Because it didn't come out how I wanted it to. I was having a really tough time getting to that place in my mind where I go to write this story and I think this chapter sucks as a result of my trying to force it. Also, I'll be moving in a few days so getting a chance to just sit down and write has been Hell. I only proofread this thing once! Ugh! Anyway, as a result of my move, I might not be able to update for a while, but since I'm going to be moving to a new school I might have a longer summer and that'll be a good thing. Senior year! (Oh crap.) Oh, and for any of you who are wondering, I never came up with a name, gender, or any sort of description for the kit that died besides it being the smallest. You wanna name it? Be my guest, it doesn't really matter much. Um, oh yeah, and I just want you all to know that I actually really like Brightheart and making Snaketail insult her is in no way a reflection of my own opinions just like pretty much everything else Snaketail says. Ok so, I think that's everything. I know this chapter isn't that great (well I don't think it's that great) but reviews still make Darkpaw happy.**


	26. Chapter 25

**I'M BACK!**

**Cat's met in this chapter:**

**Dag- sleek black tom. Ringfighter/gambler.**

**Tiberius- long-haired orange tom. Ringfighter/gambler.**

"Darkpaw? Darkpaw! Hey! Where are you, kit?" called Thundertail as she wandered through the forest alongside Mudriver. The grey tom had been incredibly worried after seeing his apprentice streak by and had refused to rest until the smaller tom was found.

"Darkpaw, where are you?" cried Mudriver, growing increasingly distraught.

"We'll find him, Mudriver," Thundertail tried to comfort her brother.

"It's freezing out here, Thundertail! He was sick. Who knows what could happen to him!"

"Try picking up his scent, again," Thundertail offered.

"I've tried! I've tried! I can't find him anywhere! The kit doesn't want to be found. Where would he go?" Mudriver sniffed around several bushes, trying desperately to pick up the scent of his lost apprentice.

"It's getting late. We should go back. Darkpaw knows the way-" Thundertail was cut off by the look on her brother's face as he turned to her.

"I ain't leaving him out here alone," the grey tom all but growled.

"Blackstar doesn't even know where we are, what we're doing. He'll be concerned."

"Let him be concerned! I'M concerned! Darkpaw is MY responsibility and I'm gonna find him!" Mudriver spun back around and continued stalking through the tall grass.

Thundertail sighed and followed. She was just as concerned for Darkpaw as Mudriver was, but if Darkpaw didn't want to be found, she didn't see how they'd be able to find him. She also figured they were risking Blackstar's wrath by being out so late when they weren't on a patrol, and ShadowClan patrols weren't known for being forgiving of even their own clanmates wandering around at night. Suspicion was common among these cats, and outcasts such as Darkpaw, Thundertail, and Mudriver were high on the list of undesirables to be suspicious of.

/

"Blackstar, we've got two warriors, Mudriver and Thundertail, unaccounted for," Russetfur said.

"Two warriors and one apprentice it seems. I can't find Darkpaw anywhere," Blackstar said after checking the empty apprentices' den.

"I didn't send them on a night patrol. Could they be out training?" Russetfur asked.

Blackstar shook his head. "They'd tell me if they were training. Besides, Darkpaw hasn't been okayed to go back to training, yet, and they wouldn't go against Littlecloud's word."

"So where are they?" Russetfur asked rhetorically.

"I'm not sure, but they better have a damn good excuse for this," Blackstar hissed.

"Shall I tell the patrol to keep an eye out for them?"

Blackstar nodded. "And if they find them, have them brought straight to me immediately."

Russetfur nodded and streaked off to the group of cats waiting to go on patrol.

/

Darkpaw sat quietly, staring down at the frozen patch of dirt. Unlike the last time he was here, he couldn't think of a single thing to say. He wasn't sure why he'd come here, but he felt like nothing else existed in the world except himself and this little grave under the dying tree. Leaves dropped off the branches overhead and one of them flicked his ear on its descent.

"I've done bad things, and I'm not sorry. Someone needs to know that. I'm not going to stop, but no one has to find out. If it kills me, no one will care. I'll likely never see you again," Darkpaw said so softly he had to strain to hear his own voice. He hung his head in shame before standing, lifting his tail and head high, and racing off into the grass, heading towards the edge of the territory.

"Ok, Ghost, you want to fight? Fine, let's fight." Darkpaw glanced at the sky. "The fighters are still there. I've got time. And even if I don't, who needs someone there to announce my death?" Darkpaw thought for a minute, though he didn't break stride. "That is…assuming I'd be the one to die," he added.

He'd almost reached the edge of the territory when he slammed into a solid body and was brought to an abrupt halt. He groaned and stood, trying to see who he'd run into.

"Well look who we found," laughed a voice.

"The little runaway," said another.

Darkpaw cleared his head and looked up to see who these voices belonged to as he certainly didn't recognize them. He was met with the sight of two toms. One was rather large, and the other small and thin. The small one was dark and sleek and had a scar running down his face. The other had long, thick orange fur and his yellow teeth were crooked but sharp.

"Do I know you?" Darkpaw asked, getting to his paws, fur bristling in anger.

"Probably not, but we know you. You've been quite the little troublemaker for us," growled the orange tom.

"What are you talking about? You two had better get off my territory before I skin you alive," Darkpaw snarled.

"Therein lies your problem, you think you can take on the world," sneered the other.

"Maybe not the world, but certainly you two. I don't know what you want with me, but you sure picked the wrong place to deal with it," Darkpaw snapped, claws extending and digging into the hard earth.

"Well I guess we'll just have to see about that," said the small tom. He lept onto the back of his partner before launching himself at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw tried to claw at him, but he flipped over the tabby's head, landing behind him. Darkpaw spun around to face him, but the other tom swiped his hind paws out from under him. The tabby hit the ground with a groan. He was ready to be back on his paws in an instant, but the small one had jumped on his back, claws digging painfully into his shoulders to hold him down. Darkpaw struggled as the orange tom moved to stand in front of him, a cruel smirk twisted onto the features of both the rouges.

"You serious? _This _is the big bad that killed Cain and the others? He's just a baby," laughed the smaller tom as he slammed Darkpaw's body harder onto the ground.

"Maybe he's having an off day. You wanna give him another shot?" asked the other.

"Nah, just kill him, we haven't got long. From what I hear, the cats around this territory don't play around," said the dark tom.

The orange tom extended his claws, they glinted dangerously in the moonlight. He smirked down at Darkpaw, "Say g-"

The tom was cut off before he could finish his final taunt as blood gushed from his neck, spraying on Darkpaw's face and the face of his partner.

"Tiberius!" shrieked the small tom. He was bowled off of Darkpaw in the next moment and all Darkpaw saw was a flash of white.

Darkpaw stood quickly as he heard more cats bounding through the trees. These cats he recognized. Tigerstripe, Speckledthorn, Tawnypelt, and Rowanclaw. Tigerstripe shot past Darkpaw without even glancing at him, standing beside the cat that had saved Darkpaw. The small, dark tom, recognizing he was outnumbered shot off into the dark. Before the white cat could pursue him, Tigerstripe stopped them.

"Don't, we're on the edge of the territory. Who knows if he has friends over there?" Tigerstripe said.

Windlegs grudgingly accepted her brother's words and turned back to the group, blood staining her white fur. She walked over to the fallen orange tom and glared down at him, nudging the large body with her paw to ensure it was lifeless.

"What the Hell were they doing here?" Windlegs asked, glancing at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw was in shock. As if being suddenly attacked, and almost killed, on ShadowClan territory by rouges wasn't enough, Windlegs had just killed one of his attackers and seemed completely unmoved by it.

"Yes, Darkpaw, what _were _two rouges doing on the territory? And what exactly were _you_ doing _here_?" Tigerstripe added with a scowl.

"Tigerstripe, don't start going off on him. He didn't have anything to do with it," Windlegs said, licking her paw clean.

"How do you know?" Tigerstripe challenged.

Windlegs slammed her paw down and stood, glaring at her brother. "Because," she hissed through clenched teeth.

Tigerstripe held her gaze for a long moment before backing down.

"He does have a point, though, Windlegs," Speckledthorn said, "Circumstance puts Darkpaw in high suspicion."

"I'll take care of it. You all finish the patrol, I'll escort Darkpaw back to camp," Windlegs ordered.

The other warriors hesitated, but moved to do as she said before Tigerstripe stopped them. "Wait, I don't want you doing that by-" Tigerstripe cowered back suddenly as Windlegs practically roared at him, claws extended, blood still peppering her face. The warriors hurried off.

"And don't forget to keep your eyes open for Mudriver and Thundertail," Windlegs yelled after them.

Darkpaw watched them go in shock. He looked up at Windlegs, but he was suddenly bowled over and pinned on his back by said she-cat. "What are you doing?" he shrieked.

Windlegs had her fangs bared and was staring him down. "Do you have any idea what they were doing here?" she hissed.

"Who? The patrol," Darkpaw joked.

Windlegs dug her front claws into his shoulders and lifted his upper body up before slamming it back down. "Now isn't the time for jokes, Darkpaw. What were those cats doing here?" she growled.

Darkpaw opened his eyes, which he had unconsciously closed when Windlegs slammed him, and glared up at her. "So you automatically assume me, too, huh? Finally decide to join forces with your brother?" he snapped.

"You try my patience," Windlegs hissed. In truth, she was struggling to keep her limbs from trembling. She was very close to breaking down. Seeing Darkpaw nearly die had scared her beyond belief, but she had to know what had happened or else she'd never be able to help him. Her thoughts were such a mess that she was unable to defend herself as Darkpaw dug his hind claws deep into her stomach and threw her off of him.

"Mind your own business, Windlegs," Darkpaw hissed, getting to his paws quickly.

Windlegs let out a shriek of rage and launched herself at him. Darkpaw wasn't expecting her to retaliate and again she held him down. One of her paws rested heavily on his chest, the other forced his head to turn to the side. "What does it take to drill a lesson into your thick skull?" she shouted.

"Keep doing what you're doing. It'll get there," Darkpaw whispered. His body was no longer tensed and he simply scowled at nothing. The weight was removed from his chest and head.

"Get up," Windlegs ordered. When Darkpaw didn't move, she grabbed his scruff and hauled him to his paws. "Walk," she ordered, no emotion in her voice. Again, Darkpaw didn't listen to her. She smacked his hind legs and he stumbled forward, scowling back at her, but he continued walking in front of her at a pace she kept regulated.

Darkpaw felt humiliated and pissed. Windlegs practically controlled his every paw step. He thought about snapping at her over his shoulder, but he didn't want to talk to her. Finally, he said in a low voice, "I'm not sorry." He didn't think she'd heard him, but she responded.

"Of course you aren't."

This stung him for some reason and he continued the rest of the way in silence. Just before they entered camp, Windlegs stopped him.

"We aren't done with this," she hissed in his ear.

"Whatever," he snapped and walked into the camp. He was heading to the apprentices' den, but Windlegs blocked his way and shoved him towards Blackstar's den. "What the Hell?" he hissed.

"Blackstar wants you to be brought to his den immediately," Windlegs explained in the same monotone she had adopted back in the forest.

"What for? I didn't do anything wrong," Darkpaw protested.

"Great, you can tell him that," Windlegs said, nudging him towards the den again.

Darkpaw scowled at her but walked to Blackstar's den with Windlegs on his heels. Blackstar ordered them in the moment Darkpaw's paws hit the entrance.

"Where were you?" Blackstar growled.

Darkpaw shrugged. "Out."

"Out?" Blackstar let out something like a mocking laugh. "Out where?"

"Out in the forest. I went for a walk," Darkpaw explained.

"Without telling anyone? Without even getting consent from the medicine cat that you were well enough to leave the camp?"

"I feel fine," Darkpaw said with another shrug. He felt anger radiating towards him. At first he thought it was coming from Blackstar, but he was quick to discover it was rolling off of Windlegs in crashing waves.

"Darkpaw, you're trying my patience," Blackstar said, standing from his nest.

"So what if I go missing for a little while? Most cats here would be glad to get rid of me."

"It's not their decision. In fact, it's not even yours. It's mine."

Darkpaw scowled at the leader who was barely visible in the dark. "What? You own me?"

"In a sense, yeah, I do. You're part of my clan. You're _my_ apprentice. You'll be _my_ warrior."

"I'm Mudriver's apprentice," Darkpaw corrected.

Blackstar suddenly rounded on Darkpaw and held his face very close to the tabby's. "Wrong, kit, Mudriver is your mentor. _I _control your training. _I _control your ceremonies, your rewards, your punishments. I control your life. You do not _breathe _without me allowing it and you sure as Hell don't go wandering off into the forest and putting your life in jeopardy without my knowing it first."

"Funny you should mention that," Windlegs mumbled.

Blackstar immediately looked at her. "What do you mean?" he inquired, leaning up and taking a step closer to the she-cat.

"There were a couple of rouges prowling around out there on the edge of the territory, tonight. They jumped Darkpaw, who knows what would have happened if the patrol hadn't found him," Windlegs explained.

"Where are they now?" Blackstar demanded.

"Well, one of them is dead. The other ran off before I could catch him," Windlegs said.

As Blackstar gazed at his former apprentice, he discovered the blood still staining her white fur. He snapped his attention back to Darkpaw. "You see, Darkpaw, this is why we have to be careful. ShadowClan territory is not safe. For you to be out there alone puts you in jeopardy. We aren't one of the larger clans. Do you really think we can afford to loose our only apprentice? And with leaf bare coming, did you think of none of this?"

"No, not really," Darkpaw admitted, but he still didn't seem sorry.

Blackstar frowned at the apprentice before giving a long sigh. "You have the rest of the patrol searching for Mudriver and Thundertail?" he asked Windlegs.

"Yes," Windlegs said.

"Good. Darkpaw, I'll deal with you in the morning. Go to your den and stay there," Blackstar ordered.

Darkpaw turned and walked slowly out of the den. Windlegs was about to follow when Blackstar called out.

"Windlegs, you stay," he said.

Windlegs, confused, obediently turned and returned to Blackstar.

Darkpaw was curious as to why Blackstar had summoned Windlegs back. His curiosity getting the better of him, he turned around at the entrance and peeked back in. Blackstar had ordered Windlegs to sit beside him and was gently cleaning the blood from her fur. The she-cat closed her eyes and allowed him to do so with no protests. A shiver ran up Darkpaw's spine as he remembered the exact same ritual being performed on him in a very different place. He backed away from the sight and bounded towards the apprentices' den.

Before he could reach his haven, however, the patrol returned with Mudriver and Thundertail in tow. As soon as the two warriors caught sight of Darkpaw, they began to run to him. However, Tigerstripe jumped in their way.

"Blackstar wants to see you," the orange tabby growled.

Mudriver rose onto his hind paws and roughly sent Tigerstripe rolling out of his way before dashing to his apprentice.

"Hey!" Tigerstripe shouted, but Russetfur appeared and called him off before he could run after Mudriver.

"Blackstar will see them in the morning," Russetfur said, "You all need to get rest."

The warriors departed to their den, leaving Thundertail and Mudriver to confront Darkpaw.

"Where were you?" Mudriver asked, worry creasing his face, "The patrol said something about rouges."

"It was nothing major. Just a couple idiots causing mischief," Darkpaw said calmly.

"Why did you run off like that? You worried Mudriver practically to death," Thundertail said.

"I didn't mean to. I just wanted to get out of the camp for a little while, that's all." Darkpaw tried to wave them off.

"It's not safe, you going out by yourself like that," Mudriver chastised.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I've already gotten this lecture twice tonight," Darkpaw said, growing annoyed.

"And if it takes a thousand lectures, I'll get it into your head!" Mudriver snapped and forced Darkpaw to look at him. "You really scared me," he said, his expression softening.

"Ok, I get it. It won't happen again," Darkpaw said, fighting the urge to roll his eyes.

"It better not, because if it does, rouges will be the last thing you need to worry about," Thundertail said and Mudriver nodded his agreement, "Now, go get some sleep. If Littlecloud okays you tomorrow, then you can return to training."

"Good night," Darkpaw said and walked to the apprentices' den.

"G'night," Mudriver called.

Darkpaw curled up tightly in his nest. It was cold, very cold, and the bedding was drying out. He decided to ignore it, not in the mood to go out and face the world again until he had to. He wasn't tired, but he must have fallen asleep because soon he was in an all too familiar setting.

/

_Black sky. White stars. Dark trees in the distance. And there he stood on the hard, black ground staring down at a body. He didn't have to see himself to know his eyes were cold and heartless. He held no mercy for the cat staring up at him. And why should he? She'd held no mercy for him. Her mouth opened and closed in silent prayers that he would release her, but every time her jaws parted even slightly, blood gushed out of it onto the ground and splashed on his paws._

_It looked like she was saying 'please'. Begging him not to do this. But what was he doing? He really didn't know. He had no memory of striking her or attacking her at all, but he should have. The proof that he had done something was right there, bleeding under him._

_He inspected her body. Gashes covered her chest and head. His front paws were resting on her stomach. When he looked down at them, he discovered that they had actually sunken into a horrific slash through the flesh on her stomach. In the very back of his mind, he felt pure horror and terror at this, but it was as though his mind had split and he remained unmoved by the sight. Only when his paws had been swallowed completely by the wound did he wrench them out before his legs could be sucked in as well. A scream tore from the she-cat's throat. With entrails still clinging to his claws, he ripped her throat open, cutting her scream short, but not stopping her body from continuing to flop around. Guts and body fluids sloshed out of the rip in her body. It was a grotesque sight. The small whimpering in the back of his mind begged him to turn away, but he did not. The body shuddered and stilled finally. He looked down, chords of flesh still connected the body to him and he shook them from his claws. The moment they were freed, he heard a piercing cry of anguish behind him and spun around. To his shock, he found a younger double of himself standing there, staring in horror at the body._

"_WHAT DID YOU DO?" Darkkit screamed and raced to the body, shoving Darkpaw aside._

_Darkpaw stared in confusion as his younger self nudged the dead body of the she-cat. Darkkit was trembling and shaking, letting out incoherent whines._

"_Please, don't be dead. I'm begging you, don't be dead." Of course the kit's cries and pleas did nothing and the shredded body remained lifeless under Darkpaw's ever-cold gaze. Darkkit sniffed and cried out, "MOMMA!"_

_Darkpaw flattened his ears against his head, trying to muffle the kit's cry. He felt disgust well up inside of him as the kit pressed himself into the mass of black fur and blood, trying to move it, trying to get some sort of reaction, a signal of life._

"_You know as well as I do that she's dead," Darkpaw said. His own voice shocked him, high pitched, like cracking ice._

_The kit, now bathed in blood turned on him, eyes bloodshot. "How could you?" he whispered in a shaky voice._

"_It had to be done," Darkpaw said with a shrug._

"_She was our mother!" Darkkit shouted, finally tearing his body away from Reaper's lifeless one._

"_No, she wasn't. We haven't got a mother," Darkpaw snapped, "She abandoned us. She brought it on herself."_

"_SHUT UP! That's a lie! You're a liar!"_

_Darkpaw shrugged again and turned from the kit. "Whatever makes you feel better. You'll understand when you're older."_

"_Is that so?"_

_Darkpaw stopped. Something was wrong. The voice was deeper now. It didn't belong to a kit. He turned back and saw his father standing where the kit had once stood._

"_No, not daddy, Darkpaw. I'm you," said the older tom with a smirk. He began walking towards Darkpaw with heavy, determined steps. The scar across his nose glinted in the moonlight. The scar was the only part of him that was not identical to Darkpaw aside from his size. As he got closer, blood sprung onto his fur. It coated his paws and face first, then his neck and quickly the rest of his body. Darkpaw knew it wasn't his own, but the blood of many others. Even the older tom's fangs were stained red making his sharp blue eyes stand out even more. "Like what you see?" he asked, walking circles around Darkpaw with an air of confidence that zapped all oxygen from the apprentices' lungs, "This is what you're going to become."_

_Darkpaw jumped as he felt something wet land on his head. He looked up and his mouth fell open in shock. The starry sky had been replaced by the shredded bodies of cats. Not just grown cats. All ages from kit to elder, male or female. Each body was mangled almost beyond recognition with their eyes wide open. No doubt, fear was the last emotion they had felt. No, not fear, pure terror. Their decaying bodies reeked of it. Even the eyes of kits that had been freshly ripped from their mothers' wombs were torn open and staring down at him. _

_Blood began to rain down from the massacre. Darkpaw looked down to avoid getting it in his eyes and discovered that he was now standing on mountains of bodies, all in the same condition as the ones above. Darkpaw heard laughter and looked back up at his older self. The other tom had his faced turned upward, his mouth wide open and curled into a smile. As he laughed, blood leaked from the corners of his mouth. He lowered his head to look back at Darkpaw, his face still twisted into a grin. He licked his teeth, causing them to redden further and chuckled again._

"_Don't you like it, kit? This is your destiny! This is your kingdom. Any day now, very soon, I won't be separate from you anymore. I'll be you, you'll be me. You'll be king." The tom threw his face to the sky and shouted, "KING OF DEATH!"_

_Darkpaw laid down on the wet, sticky bodies beneath him and covered his ears as the tom's voice cut through the air and echoed off the mountains of destruction. Death was everywhere. His gift showed him nothing, no life, not even a signature for the tom in front of him. Nothing was alive. His nose burned and his eyes watered as the stench of all the bodies invaded his nostrils, replaced all the fresh air in his lungs, spread throughout his body. He opened his eyes and looked up at the older tom, an identical grin twisted onto his face as he rose to his paws._

"_When do I start?" he shouted to the other tom, discovering it was no problem for his icy voice to be heard over the rain. To his surprise, his older double clawed him across the face, cutting a deep gash in Darkpaw's muzzle to match his own. Darkpaw cried out and looked at him in confusion._

_The older tom laughed again. "You've already started. There's no turning back!" He lifted his face to the sky once more and cackled insanely, his spiked, red fur only furthering the effect._

_Darkpaw's smile grew wider until he, too, raised his face to the sky and began laughing. Large drops of the blood-rain landed in his mouth, but he realized he no longer minded the taste._

/

Darkpaw woke with a start, scattering the dry bedding of his nest. He groaned and shut his eyes for a moment before heaving a huge sigh. Outside was pouring rain and the wind was howling, shaking the trees and tall grass that made up ShadowClan. He stood and stretched and yawned. Even though it was pitch black outside, he knew it was much too early for anyone to be awake. And yet, he sensed a presence just outside of the den. He tried to shrug it off, but he couldn't. His fur was tingling and he didn't like it. He tried to use his gift to discover who it was, but the rain washed away any scents. He scowled and finally stood.

A chilling gust of wind caught him when he reached the entrance, but he could not see anyone. He knew he probably shouldn't, but he stuck his head out of the den and looked around. He laid his ears flat against his head as the wind howled and stung his eyes. He was nearly blinded by the wind and rain, but he could swear he saw eyes watching him from the edge of the camp. Uneasy, he stuck his head back inside the den and watched the spot where he saw the eyes. The eyes didn't move and continued staring back at him, causing the fur on his spine to rise. To further his unease, the eyes seemed to be beckoning him. He resisted, but they were persistent and his curiosity got the better of him. For the second time that night, Darkpaw raced out of the camp.

Once he had gotten out of the camp, the eyes disappeared, but he still felt the presence. It seemed to surround him, causing him to spin in circles as he desperately tried to pinpoint it. He stopped before he could become distressed and took a deep breath. He shut his eyes and _felt _with his mind, trying to be as aware of his surroundings as possible. Without catching a scent or a sound, Darkpaw turned to his left and shot off into the forest. The presence stayed ahead of him, just barely out of his reach. It wanted him to follow it, wanted him to continue his pursuit. It wanted _him_.

It crossed his mind that this could be a trap. That the rouge who had come after him before might be back for a second attempt, but something inside him told him this was nothing like that. Whatever this was, it didn't want to kill him. Using only this feeling as a basis, Darkpaw continued streaking through the tall grass.

It was strange. Even though he knew the presence wasn't very far ahead of him, the grass made no noise as the presence passed through it. Darkpaw knew he might just be unable to hear it due to the forceful winds. Even so, there was something unnatural about this thing he was pursuing.

Then, all of a sudden, Darkpaw felt the presence stop abruptly. He stopped moving his paws immediately, but he continued sliding over the wet ground. The Thunder Path came into view along with the blinding lights of a monster. Darkpaw's force was carrying him directly into the monster's path with no chance of stopping. Suddenly, Darkpaw felt jaws close gently but forcefully over the nape of his neck and wrench him out of harms way just as the monster roared by, kicking up a wave of dirty water that just missed Darkpaw from where he had been pulled into the bushes. Darkpaw spun around, looking for the one that had saved him, but he saw no one still.

Growing annoyed with this game, Darkpaw called out, "Who or what are you? Show yourself to me and I won't hurt you!"

Paws clamped his mouth shut and a soft voice whispered in his ear, "It is not _my _wellbeing you should be worried about. Hush now, do you want to alert one of your clan's patrols to where you are?"

The cat must have been right next to him, but Darkpaw still could not see them. There was a brief moment of warmth as they held him, but the next instant they vanished again and all hints of warmth vanished with it.

The voice was familiar. Darkpaw racked his brain to remember its owner. Then, it struck him. "Ghost," he whispered.

"Clever, kit. I worried you might not know," came Ghost's voice.

Darkpaw had barely been able to hear his own voice over the rain and wind, but Ghost's voice cut through easily with no hints of being strained.

"So, now that I know who you are, will you show yourself to me?" Darkpaw asked, looking around to see where Ghost was.

"Oh, but Darkpaw, I'm not hiding from you."

Darkpaw felt the warmth again, this time pressed against his left side. He turned to her and felt her nose press to his. He closed his eyes and his body relaxed against hers. Without him realizing it, they were soon laying beside each other under a thick bush. Darkpaw still could not see her, but he could feel her there.

"Why did you come here?" he asked softly, eyes still closed as he rested his head against her shoulder.

"Because you wanted me to," Ghost replied.

Darkpaw's brows knit together, though he still did not open his eyes.

Ghost laughed softly and licked his forehead until it relaxed again. "You sought me out, tonight. You wanted to battle me. You very nearly wanted to die."

"I'll never die. I want to live forever, exactly as I am," Darkpaw said, his voice hard.

"No, not exactly as you are. You want to be better. You want to be different."

"I am different." Darkpaw rolled onto his side so he could rest his cheek on her foreleg and look up at her. "It's because I'm different that I am as I am."

"True, but you could be even more different, more special. You could be something none of the others have ever seen before."

"I could end them all," Darkpaw whispered, dropping his gaze.

"What?" Ghost asked.

Darkpaw frowned in confusion of his own. "I don't know. I think it had something to do with the dream I had."

"What did you dream?" Ghost asked.

Darkpaw thought, trying hard to remember his dream, but he drew up nothing. "I can't…I can't remember what it was about, but I was powerful and strong."

Ghost was quiet for a minute before she asked, "Were you happy?"

Darkpaw thought again. "No, I don't think I was. Not, all of me anyway."

"If only part of you was unhappy, then when was the other part?" Ghost pressed.

"…Elated. Happier than I've ever been in my life." Darkpaw fell silent, then a dark smirk spread across his face. "It only stands to reason that that happiness came with a price. A heavy price, that's why I was unhappy also, but it was only a small, insignificant part. I'll grow past it, I'm sure."

"So you think this dream will come true."

"Perhaps not exactly as it was, that's why I can't remember it, but in a sense, I believe it will."

Another moment of silence passed between the two. They just listened to the wind howling and the rain beating the earth.

"Do you wish to fight me, now?" Ghost asked.

"What if I did?" Darkpaw asked.

"Then, I would already have you defeated," Ghost responded.

"Really?" Darkpaw made himself more comfortable against her body. "And what makes you say that?"

Ghost looked down at him. She lowered her head and licked Darkpaw's throat. He tensed at first, but then relaxed before she pulled her head away. "Because you trust me," she said.

Darkpaw narrowed his blue eyes, pinpointing where her black ones were looking down at him. "Do I really?" he asked.

"Only a small amount, but that isn't the main reason I'd have you beaten," Ghost said, meeting his eyes calmly.

"What else is there? Skill?"

White fangs flashed as Ghost grinned. "No, it's why you trust me. Deep down, some part of you wants to be dead. That small part of you is the part that trusts me. It trusts me to kill you." Ghost lowered her head and rubbed her cheek against Darkpaw's. "But, alas, my little dark prince, I cannot. In denying the fight when it has been brought to you, you have shown that the dominant part of you wants to live. That makes me very happy, because now I know there is so much I can teach you. I can make you into something extraordinary."

"What can you make me into?" Darkpaw asked, enthralled by her words.

Ghost licked his nose, passing over the place where the scar would have been. "Come see me, soon. I will be waiting for you. I will show you then."

Darkpaw purred and closed his eyes as she continued to gently lick his face. He no longer felt any chill from the wind or rain, only the warmth radiating into his body. He was content to stay this way forever, but something in his mind pulled away. It pulled away from the warmth. It pulled towards the cold, the isolation. But the pull was still small and Darkpaw could not yet feel it.

"A patrol…" he said groggily, "A patrol from my clan, they might find us here."

"They will not, and even if they did, they cannot see me," Ghost whispered to him and continued licking his face and neck.

This comforted Darkpaw. Though he knew if he was spotted, he would be in even bigger trouble, but he could face that. It was Ghost he held the concern for. She had knowledge he wanted, and he didn't want her put in jeopardy.

/

A dark figure emerged from the tunnel under the Thunder Path. It seemed unaffected by the wind and rain and passed unnoticed by the bush Darkpaw and Ghost were under and continued on, quickly, into ShadowClan territory.

/

Darkpaw awoke in the apprentices' den the next morning. His fur was dry and clean. He looked around, confused. He wondered if what had happened last night had been a dream, but he discovered that his bedding was all knew and fresh and held the faintest scents of rain. Even so, he did not know how he got back to camp since he couldn't remember ever returning.

The rain had stopped and the cold, crisp air smelled sweet and overpowering after the storm. Darkpaw stretched and walked out of the den. Outside was not so peaceful. The winds had blown debris into the camp. The fresh kill pile had been scattered and the few warriors already awake were busily trying to fix the mayhem.

Russetfur was among the warriors cleaning up and as soon as she saw Darkpaw, she called to him. "Hey, you! Apprentice! Don't just stand there! Help out!" she snapped.

"But I thought Blackstar wanted to speak to me this morning," Darkpaw said.

"Don't be a smart ass. Do as I say and help clean up!" Russetfur hissed.

Darkpaw sighed and got to work. For a good while he dragged small branches out of the camp and placed them on a pile with others. He couldn't tell how long it was because the sky was still dark and pregnant with heavy clouds that completely blocked the sun from view, but enough time went on that most of the warriors had woken up and were also pitching in. Groups got together to lift the larger branches that an individual couldn't lift. Darkpaw worked alone. He saw Mudriver and Thundertail emerge from the warriors' den and he quickly ducked over to the nursery, not in the mood to face them. The area behind the nursery had yet to be touched so Darkpaw set to work clearing the area of things that could be dangerous for the new kits.

He heard small mewls and peeked around to see where they were coming from. Darkflower had brought Thornkit and Stormkit out and was watching them carefully as they played in a clean area. Stormkit jumped on her brother and he yowled, trying to bat her off, but her size gave her the advantage and she continued to torment him. Darkpaw noticed that Thornkit would whine and complain if Stormkit got too rough and would tell Darkflower 'yes' when she asked if he was ok, but Stormkit never said a word to Darkflower and very little to her brother.

Stormkit jumped off Thornkit into a puddle. The water splashed onto Thornkit's face and he cried out, dashing behind Darkflower. Darkflower leaned down and quietly comforted him, licking him dry. Stormkit watched the scene for a few seconds before growing bored and continued splashing in the water. She began jumping harder and harder, trying to make the biggest splash she could. To any passerby, it simply looked like a kit having fun, but Darkpaw could see the look on Stormkit's face. Her expression was determined and her eyes were cold as she directed all of her attention to the water splashing up until it slapped up into her face, soaking it as it had her brother's. She did not share Thornkit's reaction, however. She simply stared down at the water as it sloshed for a bit before growing still aside from the ripples caused by the water dripping off her face. She stared down at her reflection, distorting and righting itself in the puddle.

"Are you alright, Stormkit?" Darkflower asked.

Stormkit didn't respond, she continued staring at the water. Then, her tiny claws extended and dug into the mud at the bottom of the puddle. She ripped the mud up, clouding up the water. Her previous splashes were nothing compared to the violent thrashing she was now doing and the spikes of water shooting up around her. Darkflower stood and picked up the she-kit, still struggling, and carried her away from the puddle. She set Stormkit down next to her and held her close until Stormkit grew still again. A few warriors had stopped what they were doing and were staring, but Darkflower hissed and growled at them until they turned back to their tasks.

Stormkit seemed to be in a daze. She stared blankly back at the puddle. The water stilled and the mud settled back to the bottom. Darkflower didn't say anything, she just began cleaning the mud off of Stormkit's fur. Thornkit crawled over and laid next to his sister, twining his tail with hers. Stormkit didn't react to any of these things and continued staring at the water.

Darkpaw watched the scene play out from his secret vantage point. He watched the protective stance Darkflower took over her kits, not allowing anyone to give them so much as a strange glance. No one go too close to the protective mother. Even though the kits weren't biologically hers, Darkflower was treating the kits as her own which meant others had better treat them the same way.

Darkpaw also watched Stormkit. Even when she interacted with her brother, she seemed cut off, yet he was the only one she would speak to. When she was by herself, she went wild. Darkpaw didn't know if the water had been a stressor for her, but judging from her brother's reaction, that was the best guess. And now, she seemed dead inside. Her eyes were dull and hollow.

"Oh, little kit, you're too young to look like that," Darkpaw whispered. That was ironic, coming from him. He knew that if he'd seen his own reflection when he was Stormkit's age, his expression and eyes would have been a near mirror image of hers, but for a different reason.

He had the urge to go over to Stormkit, to talk to her even if she didn't talk back. But he knew better than to act on this urge. Darkflower didn't like any cats coming near her kits unless they were the medicine cat. She very rarely allowed another queen to watch her kits and she was well known for being ready to claw a tom's ears off if he came anywhere near them for too long. However, Darkpaw would be watching the kits. He felt a responsibility towards them and, as he watched Darkflower cater to them affectionately, he knew he felt a pang of jealousy at never having gotten the same treatment. He shook the feeling away quickly, marking it as foolish and unnecessary before going back to his work.

Stormkit felt eyes watching her and was slowly called back into her body by the feeling. Her ears pricked up and she looked around, but saw no one there. She frowned and mentally shrugged off the feeling, but it still tingled in her spine.

"What is it?" Darkflower asked her quietly.

Stormkit said nothing and went back to staring at the water, but the water bored her now. She fixed her gaze on the warriors bustling about the camp. Darkflower did not press her and just went back to cleaning her.

"I felt something. Do you think a monster was watching us?" Thornkit asked his sister in a quiet voice.

Stormkit looked down at her brother. She stared at him for a long moment, then chose, again, not to say anything. She looked back out at the warriors cleaning up the camp.

Thornkit nodded and turned to face the warriors as well. "Yeah, that's what I thought, too," he said, laying his head on his paws.

/

Darkpaw struggled and pulled angrily at a rather heavy branch. It was as thick around as he was and twice as long but he refused to ask for any help. To make matters worse, it was stuck in the mud. He pulled and tugged until his teeth slipped from the wet bark and he flew backwards, hitting his shoulders hard on the moist ground. He groaned and struggled to stand back up.

"There he is!" he heard a voice call and again he groaned.

"Darkpaw, are you ok? We haven't seen you all morning!" Thundertail said as Mudriver brushed bits of mud from his apprentice's coat.

"I'm fine, I was just working back here," Darkpaw said, shaking quickly to rid himself of any excess mud.

"Were you tryin'a move this big branch here?" Mudriver asked, walking over to Darkpaw most recent foe.

The large branch had barely moved at all and it was obvious a good portion of it was buried in the ground. Darkpaw had managed to pull barely an inch of it free.

"Why didn't you ask for help?" Thundertail asked, walking over to inspect the branch with Mudriver, "There's no way you could do this by yourself."

"Move!" Darkpaw shouted.

Mudriver and Thundertail dodged out of the way just in time as Darkpaw flashed past them and threw himself against the branch. There was a loud pop and the branch flipped free, flinging mud everywhere. Darkpaw lost his balance and barely avoided hitting his face when he fell off the branch.

"Nice," Thundertail said flatly, picking bits of mud from her fur.

"Thanks," Darkpaw said with the same tone. He grabbed hold of a thick twig hanging off the branch and began tugging it again.

"Hey, don't hurt yourself," Mudriver warned, quickly going to help his apprentice.

"I won't," Darkpaw groaned through gritted teeth. He tried to tell Mudriver he didn't need help, although the branch still wasn't budging, but he lost his footing when Mudriver grabbed the branch and gave it a great tug, succeeding in sliding the branch several inches.

"Sorry, you ok?" Mudriver asked.

"Yeah," Darkpaw groaned, giving up on cleaning himself until the job was done.

Thundertail came over to join them and with their combined efforts, they managed to drag the hulking mass of wood out of the camp. Upon their return, they were confronted by Russetfur.

"Ok, smart ass, Blackstar will see you now," she said. Mudriver and Thundertail moved to follow Darkpaw, but Russetfur stopped them. "I believe I was only talking to one smart ass. Blackstar will deal with you two later. For now, I'm putting you on a hunting patrol. The fresh kill pile wasn't big to begin with and the storm last night didn't help. Go…now!"

Darkpaw watched the siblings go, but rushed off when Russetfur turned to him. He caught sight of Windlegs helping Tigerstripe, Speckledthorn, and Thicketclaw move some of the bigger pieces of debris. She didn't see him and he decided it was just as well. Since Blackstar was waiting for him, Darkpaw didn't wait for an invitation before walking into the leader's den.

"You wanted to see me," Darkpaw stated.

"How observant of you," Blackstar said sarcastically.

"Ok, so jokes aside, what do you want?" Darkpaw sat before his leader calmly, studying the mud in his claws.

"Do you really have to ask?" Blackstar narrowed his eyes at the apprentice.

Darkpaw sighed. "Ok, so I ran off for a little while last night. No big deal."

"No big deal? You were nearly killed! Or has that lost its meaning to you?"

"Yeah, pretty much," Darkpaw said with a nod.

Blackstar let out a long sigh. How could hating Darkpaw be so tempting yet prove to be so difficult? "Even so, it doesn't undermine the stupidity of what you did. No one is supposed to leave camp without telling anyone, especially not apprentices."

"Why?" Darkpaw asked.

"Because it's dangerous."

"How?"

"What if no one had been out there looking for you and you had been killed?"

"So?"

"That bothers me."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want you to die!"

Darkpaw felt silent. He stared at Blackstar. Hours seemed to pass as well as no time at all. When Darkpaw spoke again, he had lost his cheeky tone. "Why?"

"Because you are my responsibility. Even if no other soul sees it that way, I do. I don't even care if you don't see it that way. I promised to take you in. I didn't do that just to let you die." Blackstar's voice was dead serious and all other noises seemed to have shied away.

"Those kits, you're going to announce them at the gathering," Darkpaw said.

"Yes. And you'll be there, too," Blackstar said.

Darkpaw's head snapped up and his eyes grew wide. "I'll _what_?" he nearly cried.

"Going to the gathering is an honor. It allows the leader to showcase the strength and virtues of his or her clan. You are responsible for the rescue of those kits. Why wouldn't I bring you along?" Blackstar explained.

"Because they'll all kill me!" Darkpaw answered.

"It's a peace agreement. No one will touch you. Besides, what you did is something all the forest can and should admire," Blackstar said.

Darkpaw shook his head rapidly. "They won't admire it! They don't want me there! They don't want me _here_!"

"That's their problem. Their vision is clouded, I'm hoping we can clear it," Blackstar said.

"You won't succeed."

"Let me worry about it."

"I think I'm entitled to be worried for my own life," Darkpaw argued.

"Certainly, but it's not necessary right now. However, I think if you really want to keep yourself safe, you should quit your solo nightly walks," Blackstar said calmly.

"Walk-_s_?" Darkpaw asked, his blood turning to lava in his veins. What did Blackstar know? What had Windlegs told him?

"You don't honestly expect me to believe that that was the first time you'd gone off on your own, do you?" Blackstar said.

Darkpaw lowered his eyes and laid his ears flat against his head.

"It's alright, I'm not angry. Just don't do it again," Blackstar said.

"Ok," Darkpaw said, still staring at his paws.

"Promise me," Blackstar pressed.

Darkpaw lifted his head and stared directly into Blackstar's eyes. "I promise you, Blackstar," he said.

Blackstar nodded. "You're free to go."

Darkpaw bowed his head and dashed out of the den.

/

That night, Darkpaw lay awake in his nest. This night was not like the previous one. All was still and quiet. It was almost suffocating to Darkpaw being inside the den. He was exhausted. Cleaning the camp and repairing the damages done by the storm and hunting to replenish the fresh kill pile for the hungry warriors had worn him out. He hadn't even gotten to train today even though Littlecloud had assured him he was healthy. He scowled when he remembered the confrontation that had taken place in the medicine cat's den.

_Earlier in Littlecloud's den…_

"Well, Darkpaw, you look fine to me. You're lucky, it doesn't look like you've caught white cough," Littlecloud had said happily.

"Thanks," Darkpaw said. There was a snort from the back of the den and Darkpaw turned to it, more out of instinct than actually wanting to.

"Who cares if you get sick? If we're lucky, you'll get green cough and die before we have to suffer your presence much longer," Snaketail hissed.

"If I get green cough and die, I only hope I can take you with me," Darkpaw snapped back, leaning unconsciously towards Snaketail. He didn't notice his new body stance until Littlecloud walked in front of him, cutting off his view of the she-cat.

"Little murderer! This is why even your own mother never loved you! She was probably a murderer herself, and even _she _didn't want you!" Snaketail screamed at him.

"Snaketail, that's enough!" Littlecloud ordered over his shoulder before turning back to Darkpaw. "Darkpaw, get out."

"Murderer!" Snaketail shouted.

"There's still work to be done on the camp. They need you-"

"No one needs you!"

"Go!" Littlecloud said, not addressing Snaketail.

Darkpaw was glaring at Snaketail, his eyes growing darker with rage. He lifted a paw to take a step towards her, but Littlecloud used his own paw to lower it to the ground again. Darkpaw met the other tabby's eyes.

"Don't, she's not worth it. Go," Littlecloud urged gently.

There was a tense moment before Darkpaw spun around and stormed out of the den.

"DO THE WORLD A FAVOR AND-" Snaketail cut off before the end. Darkpaw didn't know why she stopped, but he didn't want to turn around to find out. He bolted out of the den and didn't stop until he had rejoined with Mudriver and Thundertail.

_Back in the present…_

Darkpaw hissed and clawed the ground. "Why don't _you _die, Snaketail?" he mumbled angrily. He looked outside and stood. His muscles protested, but he ignored it. He remembered his promise to Blackstar that he would not sneak out again, but he ignored that, too, and dashed out into the forest.

The sky had finally cleared and the light from the stars was incredibly crisp. Against the black sky, they looked exactly as they did in Darkpaw's dreamscape. He ran until he reached the tree by the dump that Blackstar and Windlegs used to train at. He closed his eyes and sniffed for a patrol. He found no one nearby, but the dump was crawling with hundreds of bodies. Darkpaw opened his eyes and backed away from the fence.

He stood there under the tree for a while, staring into the dump, wondering if the rats would come out. A long time passed and none of the dark bodies left the boundary. Darkpaw looked up into the dark branches of the tree. Taking one last glance at the dump, he began scaling the moist bark.

The first branch was high enough up that he would normally have stopped, but tonight he didn't. He continued climbing up and over branch after branch. He reached the height he would have been forced to stay at if he were being punished by the ringfighters. He kept climbing. The trunk got narrower slowly and the branches thinner, but they could still hold Darkpaw's weight.

Without meaning to or even realizing it, Darkpaw reached the top of the tree. His breath caught in his throat as he looked out over the dump and ShadowClan territory. He could see for miles before his vision was stopped by the mountains. He turned towards the direction of ThunderClan territory and saw the bright lights of Two-Leg Place just beyond it. The place of his birth. Even though he knew it must be horrifically ugly up close, the lights coming from the two-leg dens reminded him of the stars. He looked back up at the sky and decided the real stars were lovelier still and his mind wondered if all the bright lights the two-legs had blinded them to this view. He silently thanked StarClan that he was in the forest even though he was hated.

He stayed up there, looking at the sky, allowing his mind to wander. He thought of his mother, then Blackstar, then Littlecloud, then Mudriver and Thundertail, then Windlegs. In the silence, he closed his eyes, finding himself much more relaxed out here than he had in the den. He inhaled the sweet scent of the tree, breathing in its life, not sparing a thought to the terrible things below. Up here, he was safe, he was alone. Mudriver, Thundertail, and Windlegs could wait. Part of him wanted to be with them, but the other part wanted to stay up here forever. He knew he wouldn't, though. Soon, he would climb down from this tree and return to his nest, return to his life. For now, he just sat alone and let his mind wander aimlessly. He thought of every cat he knew, finding it did not bother him to think even of his enemies while he was alone here.

Then a voice that was nearly his own but wasn't cut through the night and his thoughts like a thousand sharpened claws. _"You will kill them all," _it hissed, so quietly it might not have existed but loud enough that Darkpaw knew he had heard it. His eyes flew open and he nearly fell off his perch when he spun around, looking for the source of the voice. He tried using his gift to seek out the one who had spoken.

There was dead silence, now. Even the scuttling of the rats below had quieted. Darkpaw's thundering heart was muted in his ears, his eyes painfully wide in searching.

There was no one there…

**Whoop! Whoop! Over 9,000 words! Longest chapter yet! Ok, who's mad at me?...Yeah, I thought that would happen. Look, I can explain, really I can. Ok, I told you guys I was moving. I moved to Riverside, CA. I thought it would be great living with my aunt, you know? I WAS WRONG! I'm not going to go in detail about what happened, but let me just say I can now relate to Darkpaw more than I ever thought I would be able to. No, I wasn't hit, but words hurt more than that sticks and stones thing claims. Anyway, after three months, my mom and I moved again. We're now in Kansas living with my grandmother and things are going much better here. Let's hope it stays that way this time. Anyway, you guys don't care about my problems, you care about Darkpaw's, so, review and make the little nipper happy because he has more misery in store. See, I wrote a death scene AND a dream AND the kits AND fighting AND yummy angst all in one chapter plus a little extra JUST FOR YOU GUYS! Because I really do love you that much. I know, it seems like I abandoned you, BUT I DIDN'T! See, now my hands hurt from typing so much. Oh, and I wrote a quick fic about Darkstripe (called ****Cain's Praise****)because I feel so bad for leaving you guys for so long so if you like the father as much or almost as much or more than you like the son, check it out. I already put in the whole 'reviews' bit so peace-out(but hopefully not for too long).**


	27. Chapter 26

**Sorry if there's any grammatical or whatever mistakes in this chapter. I kinda rushed it and really wanted to get it up today so I didn't proofread it as many times as I usually do.**

Things will look better in the morning. This was a phrase Darkpaw had never believed until now. When he had finally climbed down the tree and returned to his nest, the air had gotten startlingly cold, but he had paid it no mind since he was busy thinking about the strange voice he had heard. The clouds had been thick and heavy and almost blocked out the nearly-full moon, but he had grown used to this. However, as he looked over the camp, he discovered something he was definitely not used to. In the early morning light, ShadowClan shone brighter than Darkpaw had ever seen it before. Something cold and white blanketed the ground thickly. He was afraid for a little while to step in it, having no idea what it was, but as warriors came out of the den and fearlessly padded into the frozen blanket, Darkpaw, too, stepped out.

It was cold, very cold, on his paws and Darkpaw sprang up as his leg was sucked into the ground. This spring, however, simply advanced his march into the frozen sea and soon he was standing in the cold half-way up his legs. He jumped again, but didn't get quite as far this time, finding it very hard to move in this…whatever it was. He heard a chuckle and looked up to discover Mudriver and Thundertail approaching him.

"What's the matter, kit? Don't like your first snow?" Mudriver asked, long legs moving effortlessly through the snow.

"No, I don't," Darkpaw said, shoving his way closer to his mentor.

"I'm with you. Snow rabbit, here, doesn't have the same difficulties us short-furred cats have," Thundertail said, shoving her brother with her shoulder and sending him slightly off-balance. "But you'll get used to it, eventually."

"So what are we doing today?" Darkpaw asked, hoping it had as little to do with the snow as possible.

"Hunting," Mudriver said, "Leaf-bare has arrived and that means fresh kill is essential and scarce. Plus, you need to learn how to hunt in the snow."

Darkpaw groaned and Thundertail gave him a reassuring smile. "I've got a patrol. I'll see you guys later," the she-cat said and bounded off.

The snow crunched under Darkpaw and Mudriver's paws, but thankfully it didn't soak through Darkpaw's fur quite as easily as rain did. Darkpaw was still cold, he couldn't deny, but at least he was dry.

For most of the day, Mudriver helped Darkpaw learn to tread quietly through the snow and run fast enough to keep from sinking down into the white blanket. The sun glaring on the icy ground hurt Darkpaw's eyes and he was thankful that ShadowClan was mostly shaded. Despite their best efforts, Darkpaw and Mudriver found only a single mouse a piece. They refused to give up even as the sky darkened, but it was beginning to look hopeless.

The snow on the meadow had melted slightly in the sunlight during sun high, and Mudriver had chosen here to help Darkpaw train after the clouds covered the sun and stopped the glare. The marsh Darkpaw had gone through with Blackstar was completely frozen and Mudriver was attempting to teach Darkpaw how to walk on the ice. Attempting, but not exactly succeeding

"You have to keep your claws extended. It will help with your grip," Mudriver said.

Darkpaw attempted to take a step, but his paws slipped out from under him and he took another hard fall to the ground with a groan. He was amazed that the grey warrior could keep his grip with all that fur under his paws.

Mudriver sighed and walked over to his apprentice. Rather than help Darkpaw up, he merely grabbed Darkpaw's scruff and slid him onto the shore and kept the tabby on his back. "Let me see your paws," he ordered.

"What? Why?" Darkpaw asked.

"Because," was all Mudriver said before lifting one of Darkpaw's front paws and inspecting it. "Here's your problem," Mudriver said and lifted his own paws for Darkpaw to see. To Darkpaw's surprise, most all the fur had been plucked from between Mudriver's pads. "It doesn't feel particularly good, but it's a life-saver, literally. ShadowClan remains icy throughout most of leaf-bare and new-leaf because of the shadows. We don't need you slipping around and cracking your skull open, do we?" Mudriver explained.

"Oh," was all Darkpaw said before looking at his paw. With some help from Mudriver, Darkpaw's pads were plucked as cleanly as Mudriver's. Darkpaw was thankful when it was finally over and allowed his paws to rest in the snow. Mudriver hadn't been kidding when he said it didn't feel good.

"Now, let's try this again," Mudriver said, leading Darkpaw back out onto the ice.

This time, Darkpaw had much more luck and his traction allowed him to run, carefully, across the ice and onto the other side of the marsh without taking the nasty falls that had accompanied him before.

The sky suddenly grew overwhelmingly dark and the training stopped. Darkpaw looked to the sky, fearing a sudden storm. To his surprise, no storm came. Instead, small white flakes began trickling down from the clouds.

"It's snowing!" Mudriver laughed as the flakes clung to his thick fur.

Darkpaw was awestruck. "This is what Runningnose was talking about when he mentioned snow?" Darkpaw asked.

His breath clouded in front of him, melting the tiny flakes in its path. Experimentally, he batted at some of the flakes. They melted at his touch and he found even the little pinpoints of cold were bearable. A funny feeling came over him and he smiled. "I like this stuff," he decided and ran around the meadow, chasing after the swirling flakes. Darkpaw stopped and glanced back when he heard Mudriver chuckling again. "What's so funny?" he asked.

"Darkpaw, Outcast of Outcasts, chasing snowflakes. You really are just a kit," Mudriver said with a smile.

"I'm a special kit, though," Darkpaw said, "Come on, Mudriver, this stuff isn't so bad."

Mudriver raced over to join his apprentice and they darted through the field, playfully splashing snow at each other. They jumped at each other and tussled. Darkpaw quickly learned that fighting in snow was very different from what he was used to. He caught on quickly, learning how to keep his footing in the frozen field.

Mudriver jumped at Darkpaw and they both rolled through the snow, covering their fur in the white flakes. Darkpaw shook, sending up a little blizzard from his pelt. Mudriver shook and Darkpaw got a taste of what a blizzard really was.

"Alright, enough playing around, there's still training to be done before you go back and tend to Runningnose," Mudriver said.

Darkpaw grudgingly stopped his play and fell back into the regular routine of training. After honing his skills in the snow, mentor and apprentice set out to try again at hunting. The snow stopped falling, but the cold was getting to be too much as the sun set and the shadows overtook the territory. Having found nothing in this attempt, Mudriver and Darkpaw returned to camp empty-handed for the first time. This concerned Darkpaw, but Mudriver told him not to worry too much. After all, this happened every year and ShadowClan always made it through.

The fresh kill pile had been moved to a sheltered place close to the warriors' den to keep it from freezing solid out in the elements. Calling it a pile really didn't do it justice anymore since there were only a few meager scraps remaining when Darkpaw arrived and he knew a large number of warriors hadn't eaten, yet. Taking the mouse he had caught earlier, Darkpaw raced over to the elders' den.

"Runningnose, you ok in there?" Darkpaw called into the den.

"Come in, Darkpaw," came the reply and Darkpaw entered.

The den was well insulated, but still cold. Runningnose was curled up tightly in his nest. "I brought you your meal," Darkpaw said, laying the mouse in front of the former medicine cat.

"Thank you, Darkpaw. Have you gotten anything to eat today?" Runningnose asked.

Darkpaw shook his head. "There's nothing there and the warriors need their strength."

"A fine young apprentice, but you need strength, too. Don't skip too many meals. We don't need you falling into old habits. ShadowClan needs you just as much as the warriors."

"Is there anything else you need?" Darkpaw asked.

Runningnose shook his head. "Go see if Littlecloud needs some herbs or anything."

Darkpaw nodded and streaked out of the den. He'd forgotten to prepare himself for the snow and slipped, sliding and crashing right into Tigerstripe.

"Hey, watch it!" Tigerstripe hissed, rounding on Darkpaw.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see your ugly ass there," Darkpaw snapped back. He sniffed and quickly covered his nose. "Damn, do you reek! What have you been laying in the body of a dead badger for three days?" he hissed.

"You better learn to show me respect, rouge," growled Tigerstripe.

"I show you all the respect you deserve, Tigerstripe," Darkpaw said before bounding off to Littlecloud's den.

Littlecloud was nursing a warrior who seemed to have slipped and injured themselves on the ice. Snaketail was blessedly asleep. Darkpaw waited until Littlecloud had finished with the warrior before making his presence known.

"Littlecloud, do you need me to get you anything?" Darkpaw asked as the warrior limped past him.

"Actually, yes there is something you could get for me. I'm guessing I'll need some cat mint soon as well as a few other things. Come here, I'll show you what you need to get." Littlecloud showed Darkpaw a small collection of herbs and told him where to find them. After supplying the apprentice with a small pouch, Littlecloud sent him on his way.

The snow transformed ShadowClan territory into some other place. Miraculous, beautiful, and dangerous. Darkpaw maneuvered the dark snow carefully. The moon and stars shone on the smooth surface. Darkpaw loaded his pouch with as many of the herbs Littlecloud had requested as he possibly could before turning back to camp.

Darkpaw found he rather enjoyed racing through the chilly air at night. He liked hearing the ever-so-slight crunch of the snow under his paws and seeing his breath shooting ahead of him as he ran. He was so caught up in the feeling that he wasn't prepared when his paws suddenly struck ice and he went skidding into a large rock. He hissed in pain when his chest struck the rock and then again when his shoulder struck the hard ground. He panted, trying to catch his breath, when suddenly he heard someone cough. It was a rasping, choked cough and Darkpaw knew it was not a good thing. Staying as quiet as he could, he shut his eyes and tried to locate the one who had coughed. His stomach dropped when he made out Windlegs's life signature, marred at the throat by something dark green. Darkpaw recalled when he'd seen another warrior coughing and the white in their throat. That warrior had been diagnosed with white cough as had every other warrior Darkpaw had seen the sickness in. Forgetting about his injuries and snatching up his pouch as quickly as possible, Darkpaw raced madly back to camp and into Littlecloud's den.

"Windlegs has green cough," Darkpaw said quickly.

"Another one?" Littlecloud asked. It was then that Darkpaw saw the two new additions to the den, both were sporting the green mass Darkpaw had seen in Windlegs. "Bring her to me right now," Littlecloud ordered and Darkpaw ran out again, dropping the pouch in front of Littlecloud before searching for Windlegs.

Windlegs wasn't hard to find. She was returning to camp just as Darkpaw raced out. She didn't look well, but when she saw Darkpaw, she cleared her throat and straightened up. "Hey, Darkpaw, I was just out hunting. Shouldn't you be staying in camp by now?" she asked, unable to hide the rasping waiver in her voice.

"Come with me," Darkpaw said and led her toward Littlecloud's den.

"Darkpaw, I'm fine, really," she protested, but Darkpaw grabbed her leg with his claws and pulled her along with him.

"Here she is," Darkpaw said.

Littlecloud raced over. He inspected Windlegs before grabbing an herb. "Take this and take a nest," he ordered her.

"Littlecloud," she began to protest.

"Windlegs," Littlecloud cut in, giving her a hard look until she consented and chose a nest. Littlecloud turned to Darkpaw with a sudden strange look.

"What's wrong?" Darkpaw asked.

Littlecloud beckoned for Darkpaw to follow him and led the apprentice to the other side of the den away from the others. "How'd you know?" he asked.

"How'd I know what?" Darkpaw asked back.

"How did you know Windlegs had green cough. You've never seen a cat with green cough before. I wouldn't even think you know the symptoms," Littlecloud said.

"I…uh…I…hunch?" Darkpaw lied.

"Darkpaw, tell me. I know there's more to it. There's something about you. I don't know what it is, but if you can help me…" Littlecloud trailed off.

Darkpaw looked into the other tabby's eyes and sighed. "I can see it. I don't know how. When I scent something, I suddenly know its health and mood and age. I can even pinpoint prey or other warriors out in the forest without even seeing or hearing them. I don't know why I can do it, but I've always been able to."

Littlecloud looked stunned for a moment. "Have you told anyone else about this?" he asked.

"Mudriver and Thundertail know, that's it," Darkpaw said.

"Come with me," Littlecloud ordered and Darkpaw followed him out into the camp.

Darkpaw had expected Littlecloud to take him to Blackstar's den. Instead, Littlecloud led Darkpaw to the warriors' den. They stopped just outside the entrance and Littlecloud turned to Darkpaw again.

"Can you tell whether anyone else has green cough from here?" Littlecloud whispered.

Darkpaw nodded and shut his eyes. He scanned carefully over every warrior in the den, looking for the tiniest hint of the illness. Once he was finished, he pointed two other warriors out to Littlecloud. The older tabby went in immediately and pulled out the sleepy warriors, inspected them, and then ordered them to his den. They did so without a fuss, too tired and now too cold to argue.

"Come on, I want you to check Blackstar," the medicine cat said.

"I can tell from here," Darkpaw said, "and I already checked. He's fine."

"Good, and what of those in the nursery?"

"All perfectly healthy from what I've seen."

"Runningnose?"

"Old, but fine."

"And yourself?"

Darkpaw stopped. "Well, actually, I don't know. I can't see myself. I don't feel sick," he answered.

Littlecloud looked him over. "You seem fine. If you start feeling sick at all, the smallest little bit, you come straight to my den. And if you see anyone else getting sick, alert me immediately, understand?"

Darkpaw nodded.

"That's a gift from StarClan you have, Darkpaw," Littlecloud sighed.

"Why would StarClan give me a gift?" Darkpaw responded.

"Perhaps you were the only one deserving of it." There was a short silence before Littlecloud said, "You need rest, Darkpaw. Go to your den. Without sleep, you'll be more susceptible to illness." Littlecloud turned to go.

"Wait," Darkpaw called and the tabby turned back, "Are you going to tell Blackstar?"

"It's not my gift. Who you tell is your decision alone," Littlecloud replied.

"Snaketail's legs will never heal, you know."

"I know, but I promised her time and I'll give it to her. Maybe it will help her come to terms with the inevitable."

"Maybe it'll destroy her anyway."

Littlecloud stared at Darkpaw calmly for a long moment before turning back to his den. "Good night, Darkpaw," he said before returning to his patience.

Darkpaw watched him go, but didn't return to the apprentices' den as he'd been told. He ran around the den and shot out into the forest.

Darkpaw's exit was only a few moments before the entrance of a different figure. A heavily muscled shadow slipped into the camp and into the warriors' den with no interference.

/

Darkpaw's paws crunched in the snow as it glittered beneath him. He discovered that he became short of breath sooner due to the frigid air invading his lungs, but he powered through it. He passed the place where the rouges had attacked him so recently and shot through the bushes and over the boarder.

He made his way down the slippery slope into the clearing lit by the pits of fire. The ring held barely any traces of snow as most of it had turned to mud due to the cats scrambling around in it. It was easy to distinguish those that had fought by the dirty snow clinging to their pelts. It didn't melt and Darkpaw wonder if it was because of the coldness these cats possessed. He located J.T. at the rings edge and made his way over.

"J.T.," Darkpaw called, alerting the white tom to his presence.

J.T. saw him and immediately looked pleased. "Darkpaw, it's been too long, my friend. Where have you been?" he asked happily.

"I tried to come a couple of nights ago, but I was stopped," Darkpaw explained, deciding to leave out what had stopped him, "Where's T.J. and the others?"

"Mother and Father are talking to a new apprentice. T.J. is fighting tonight. I recommend you fight as well. Some cats were beginning to wonder what had happened to you and you've already been challenged," J.T. said.

"Challenged? By who?" Darkpaw asked.

"By me," came a voice from behind them.

Darkpaw turned to see Frost sneering down at him.

"Well, not me exactly," Frost elaborated. He pulled a young she-cat over to stand beside him. "Her."

The she-cat looked exactly like Frost except for her deep green eyes and the black fur black running up her muzzle to her forehead. She was covered with scars and her eyes, though brilliant, were dead as she stared at her opponent.

"This is Cara, my little girl. I told you about her," Frost said, looking down at his daughter in mock affection. "She's been waiting to meet you for a while now."

Darkpaw looked back at Cara calmly. "Well, if you've wanted to meet me for so long, let's go talk then," he said and began pushing his way out of the crowd.

Frost moved to follow the tabby, but Cara shouldered him out of the way and disappeared into the mass with Darkpaw. Frost growled and his claws extended, but he stayed where he was as the fight in the ring came to an end.

Darkpaw picked his way back up the slope, Cara right behind him. He came to a stop at a good vantage point and sat down and began cleaning his paws. "So you're Frost's daughter," he said.

"I guess you could say that," Cara replied, sounding bored as she watched the next fight happen.

"You seem a lot calmer than your father," Darkpaw pointed out.

"I'm better, too, but he's yet to learn that."

"What do you mean?" Darkpaw asked, suddenly interested.

"Frost is a fool. He's murderous, but he has no plan. I could end him in a heartbeat, but he denies it. If he doesn't heed my warnings soon, I just might have to show him," an emotion like amusement flashed through Cara's dead eyes for a split second before they deadened again.

"Why haven't you already?" Darkpaw asked.

"I don't fight for pleasure. I don't kill for pleasure even though Frost thinks I do. He thinks I'm just like him, but if I was, I'd be dead just like those that came before me. I'm still alive because I'm better than Frost could ever hope to be. I didn't challenge you, Darkpaw. Frost did it for me. I've got no desire to fight you or kill you." Cara was looking at him now very evenly.

"You know what, I don't want to kill you either, but I do want Frost dead," Darkpaw said.

"Do what you like with him, but I get him first," Cara said darkly.

"Who was your mother?" Darkpaw asked.

"Whoever Frost thought was strong enough to be my mother. He chooses a mate he can't kill, then takes the kit away as soon as it is weaned and raises it in a band of cats just a vicious as he is. Honeydew could be my mother, or any other she-cat that's alive in the remains of BloodClan. I don't know, and I really don't care," Cara said.

Darkpaw believed every word she was saying, but he couldn't respond because Frost was approaching up the slope.

"It's time," Frost said.

Darkpaw stood and noticed Cara taking her time as she stood and walked calmly down the slope. Cara was calm even as she walked into her cage and Frost shut and locked her door. Darkpaw did not understand how she could be so calm when, as hard as he tried not to, he began panting and praying that the cat would soon open his door and allow his freedom. With a clang, the door was open and he darted out. Even though her door was open, Cara stayed where she was.

"Transfer!" she shouted suddenly and Darkpaw froze in his tracks. He had no idea what she meant. Cara stepped out of the cage and walked to the center of the ring. "I request a transfer. Darkpaw is not the cat I truly wish to challenge," she announced.

Lynn stepped into the ring and approached her. "Cara wishes to choose a new opponent," Lynn announced to the crowd before addressing Cara, "Who do you choose?"

"I wish to replace Darkpaw with Frost," Cara announced.

Lynn turned to Darkpaw. "Do you accept Frost taking your place in this battle, Darkpaw?"

Darkpaw, still slightly stunned, just nodded.

"Frost, you have been challenged by Cara as a replacement for Darkpaw upon Cara's request. Will you accept?"

A smirk twisted on Frost's face. "You little demon," he said to Cara, "You're just asking for death. Yes, I accept Cara's challenge."

"Then Darkpaw is free to go. Frost will take Darkpaw's place," Lynn announced.

Darkpaw had left the ring and went to sit beside J.T. who was now joined by Flame, Ruby, and T.J. T.J. and Flame were nuzzling each other affectionately, but when T.J. saw Darkpaw, his attention turned to the other tabby.

"Darkpaw, I'm so glad you're here," T.J. said happily.

Flame laughed, "You are so excitable, Phantom," revealing the name she had chosen for her mate.

"My angel, do stop teasing me," T.J. said light-heartedly.

"Why, when it's so much fun?" Flame retorted.

"Honestly, you should give her a different name," Ruby said, "She's nothing like an angel."

"She's my angel," T.J. said and pressed his nose to Flame's flank.

The conversation ended when a loud clang sounded through the clearing. Frost raced out of his cage just as Darkpaw had done, but Cara walked out as though nothing were going on. Frost lept at his daughter, but she twisted her body suddenly like lightening and sank her claws into his shoulder, wrenching him out of his flight and slamming him to the ground. Cara clawed Frost across the face and stepped back, waiting for him to stand again. Frost got to his paws and dashed at Cara again. He tried to trick her by cutting to the left, but Cara moved with the skill of one who had fallen for this trick one too many times and cut him off, grabbing his tattered ear in her fangs and throwing him onto his back. Frost jerked his hind legs in an attempt to claw her, but Cara placed a paw on his head and moved her fangs to bite into one of Frost's hind paws. Her teeth sank into the pad and Frost yowled, trying to kick her off. Cara ripped her fangs out, causing a crippling gash in the paw before backing off again.

Frost staggered to his paws. Anger radiated off of him just as drops of blood seeped out of his wounds. He carried his injured paw up, now reduced to using three legs. "You fucking harlot, I'm the one that taught you that trick," he hissed.

"Then you shouldn't have fallen for it," Cara responded in her same eerily calm voice.

Frost attacked Cara again. Through pure dumb luck, Frost managed to get Cara to slip on a patch of ice and pin her onto her back. Cara remained calm, but Frost looked insane, a twisted grin slashed across his face.

"And here I thought you'd be one of the ones that survived," Frost said.

"Father," Cara said, "I don't want any more siblings." Before Frost could process what had been said, Cara raised her hind leg and extended her claws fully. She slashed her claws down Frost's stomach and between his hind legs.

Frost screamed in agony and was thrown off his daughter, landing on his back over a foot away. With his mouth opened in a long cry, Cara tore her claws across his mouth, cutting the corners of his cheeks. The scar would make his twisted grin appear permanent.

"You little bitch!" Frost shouted.

Cara clubbed Frost in the head and forced him onto his side. She sank her fangs into his shoulder and bit down, causing Frost's cries to increase in volume.

It was then that Darkpaw noticed a bare patch of flesh on Cara's left shoulder. It looked as though someone had ripped the flesh from the body and only a thin layer remained to protect the bone. Darkpaw realized what Cara was going to do a moment before she did it. With another agonized cry from Frost, Cara stripped the flesh from his shoulder.

Cara spat the fur and flesh onto the ground before leaning down to Frost's ear. "You have two options, Frost. Surrender to me now and give me command over the band, or die a very painful death. You know what I mean by painful," she said and pressed her paw into Frost's open wound on his shoulder.

Frost hissed in pain before he began to laugh. "You murderous little traitor, I should have known this would happen. The band is yours. Yours to command or slaughter."

"And you?" Cara pressed her paw harder into the wound.

"And me. Frost, at your service," Frost consented through gritted teeth.

Cara seemed satisfied. She leaned down and took a firm hold of Frost's scruff, lifting him slightly before releasing him.

Lynn walked into the ring, a grin on her face. She looked out at the audience. "Do I really need to say it?" the white she-cat asked, "Cara has defeated Frost."

"Come, Frost," Cara said. Frost staggered to his paws and limped after Cara as she exited the ring. Cara looked at no one as she walked calmly through the crowd. A few cats snickered at Frost as he passed, but Frost didn't dare fall back to confront them.

"I've been wondering for a long time when one of those kits would overthrow Frost. I wondered if it might end up being Cara," Ruby said.

"Why?" Darkpaw asked.

"Because a son tends to follow his father and wants to please him. A daughter is more likely to rebel against her father, especially when she has had no mother," Ruby explained.

"Oh." Darkpaw glanced at his paws, a few thoughts jumping through his mind. He considered asking about something, but changed his mind at the last moment and instead asked, "What was that 'transfer' thing Cara did? I've never heard it before."

"A transfer is one of the requests a cat has the opportunity to make before a fight starts. As you saw, when a cat calls for a transfer, they may switch out their opponents. But, the opponent has to agree to it," T.J. said.

"There may also be the request to multiply. If a fighter decides they want more than just the opponent they are fighting, they may call for a multiply and call out more opponents," J.T. added, "Or you can make a request for back-up, but again your opponent must agree to it and you may only choose one other cat to aid you."

"Right, or a forfeit. You can assume what that is," T.J. said.

"Yes, but I wouldn't recommend it. Forfeits are not taken very well by the others. You might just find yourself with a battle you didn't expect," J.T. said.

"And one last thing," T.J. said, "All requests must be made after the cage doors have been opened but before the cat making the request has left the cage."

"That sounds complex," Darkpaw said.

"Maim and murder are always complex if done properly, little one," Flame told him with a smile.

"I see." Darkpaw looked into the ring where a fight had just ended. The loser was hardly recognizable. Their body was artfully sliced to pieces. Blood formed a complicated design in the snow. "Very interesting." Darkpaw suddenly felt a prickling on his fur like someone was watching him. He spun around, but saw no one looking at him. All the fighters were focused on the fights, but Darkpaw knew someone out there was looking at him, he just couldn't see them. "Ghost," he whispered.

"What?" T.J. said, "Ghost? Oh, didn't you know? She withdrew her challenge to you and we haven't seen her since."

But Darkpaw wasn't listening. He was pushing his way through the crowd and to the forest as though he were being pulled by an invisible string. He made his way down the slope he had used to enter the forest when he'd done the run and used the same hole in the brush to leave the light from the fires behind him. It was dead silent in the forest, but Darkpaw could sense a presence here.

"Ghost," he called again, still barely above a whisper. Something flashed by in the corner of his eye and he chased after it, deeper into the forest and farther from ShadowClan territory.

He didn't know how long he ran in pursuit of the figure, but when he did stop, he was suddenly in a vast clearing. There were no trees or tall grass to obscure the stars shining brightly overhead. In fact, for about a twenty foot radius in all directions, nothing was growing. The grass underfoot was dead. The branches of all the trees seemed like they were trying to grow away from this area. Darkpaw could sense nothing anymore, until he heard a faint rustling and suddenly Ghost stepped into view. Her pelt glittered under the stars making her appear like a cat made from the stars themselves rather than a corporeal cat, but Darkpaw knew this was what she was. He did not believe in cats made of stars. Looking up, the sky was vast and, except for the moon and the stars, completely empty. This figure coming toward him, she was real. She existed.

"Darkpaw," Ghost said, "I knew you would come."

"It couldn't have been hard to realize," Darkpaw responded with a grin and pressed his nose to Ghost's flank, "But I don't understand. Why did we have to come here?"

"Because there are things I want to teach you, but first you must prove yourself worthy so that I may have permission," Ghost said.

"Permission from who?" Darkpaw asked, but his answer did not come from Ghost.

A sudden wind kicked up, causing the trees to shiver and shake like they were terrified. The wind carried on it the voices of multiple cats, though Darkpaw could not tell how many. It could have been as few as two or as many as two hundred. "Permission from us," said the voices and Darkpaw felt the fur on his spine rise, "We are those who rule over the ones like you: the injured that carry with them gifts and destinies." The wind died down when their voices stopped.

"I don't understand," Darkpaw said, turning to Ghost.

"You are not the only cat to carry a fate such as yours, as you know," Ghost explained, "But you know you must go on alone so that the lesson you hold is truly realized. Unfortunately, some messengers carry their burden more easily than others because some burdens are heavier, some destinies harder to deal with. I believe yours is one such destiny. I don't want to see you get destroyed like so many others. If I'm allowed to teach you, to care for you, I might be able to save you from being crushed."

"But how do I prove myself worthy?" Darkpaw asked.

"That's the slightly more difficult part," Ghost said, "The others must see into your mind and get to your soul. They have to make sure it is not too damaged already."

"How am I supposed to do anything about the amount of damage in my mind?" Darkpaw cried.

"Darkpaw, you have complete control over your mind. Anything that's in there, you allow to be in there. Show them who you truly are."

"How?" Darkpaw asked, but Ghost didn't answer.

The wind picked up again and out of nowhere it seemed two small kits appeared. They were as impossible to see as Ghost, more so in fact, because their jet black coats didn't seem to reflect any of the light cast down by the stars. They didn't look like they could have been more than three or four moons old, but their startling grey eyes, the only part of their bodies that did hold light, showed an unnatural wisdom even for an elder.

"Ghost, who…" Darkpaw started, but Ghost had vanished.

The kits reached Darkpaw and tilted their faces up, causing the moon to reflect perfectly in their eyes as though two little moons made up their eyes. They leaned up, close to Darkpaw's face and he flinched back.

"What are you doing?" Darkpaw asked, very uneasy.

"The eyes are the pathway to the soul. They allow us to see who you truly are," the kits said in unison and lunged forward, touching their noses to Darkpaw's eyelids.

Darkpaw felt a white-hot pain shoot through his entire body and opened his mouth to scream but no sound came out. Then, through the pain came another feeling that his eyes were being ripped from their sockets. Just as the agony was getting to be too much, it stopped. Darkpaw fell to the ground, exhausted. He slowly opened his eyes, terrified that he was now blind, but he found he could see perfectly. However, he questioned that when he realized what he was seeing. A new cat now stood in front of him facing the two kits. This cat, under a thick coating of blood, had Darkpaw's coloring. A dim blue light shone from this new cat. The cat turned his head and Darkpaw was startled to see his own eyes staring at him as though from a reflection. The kits had begun to pace around the bloody new arrival.

"The soul is damaged, sister," said one, looking the cat up and down, "It is bathed in blood."

"Yes, but it also bleeds from its own wounds, brother," said the other.

"The light is so dim, how is it alive?" asked the first, apparently a tom.

"It must have help, but from what?" asked the she-cat.

"And what has damaged it so? The wounds across the chest and the shoulders are surely from outside influence," said the tom, gazing at a deep gash starting at what Darkpaw now assumed to be his own soul's chest and running all the way down its stomach.

"Yes, but the wound at the throat can only be self-inflicted," said the she-cat, scrutinizing another deep rip across the soul's throat. Her eyes flicked over to Darkpaw. "What could it be living in this mind that would try to kill its own soul?"

"What indeed?" the tom agreed and they both looked at Darkpaw.

Darkpaw didn't know why they were staring at him. Then pain overtook him again, not white-hot as the first had been, but like something was trying to claw its way out of his insides. His head began throbbing and he thought it might explode. He closed his eyes tightly, but they were ripped open against his will by whatever was trying to get out. With an agonizing tearing feeling that shot through Darkpaw's entire body, whatever it was wrenched its way out.

Now yet another new cat stood in the clearing. This time Darkpaw was no longer surprised to see that the new cat was also a replica of himself, though this new one was older and bore a single glinting scar across his nose. Shadows seemed to radiate from him and his eyes were the only light thing about him. He cast a disgusted look down at the soul and the soul cowered away from him.

The differences between the two were striking. Though their fur and eyes were the same color, the soul was clearly in worse shape. The soul was an emaciated, pathetic sight. The faint blue glow it held was easily overpowered by the shadows radiating from the other replica. It looked exhausted, panting raggedly like something was wrong with its lungs. Blood soaked it, making the fur spike up and mat painfully. Long, deep cuts covered most of its body and they were emitting a constant stream of blood. Its claws were fully extended and covered in the fur and dried blood of other cats, making them impossible to sheath due to their filthiness. Its fangs were yellow and crooked, bearing the same filth as the claws. The small tongue was a sick blood red and its gums were pale almost to the point of being white. Its eyelids were drooping, barely keeping the eyes open. Its right ear was completely torn off and the left was merely strips of flesh. The head was bent in an unnatural way as though the neck was broken. Its tail was missing fur and was bent at odd angles all the way down its length. Due to the things emaciation, its spine and hips were clearly visible. In fact, the points of the hip bones and parts of the spine poked straight through the flesh, bones yellowed like the fangs. All in all, it looked like this thing would be better off dead.

The other entity, however, seemed to be in perfect shape. Aside from his scar, he had no injuries whatsoever. His weight was exactly as it should be and muscles rippled under his sleek coat. His fangs were white and healthy just like the rest of his body. The shadows he emitted made his silver stripes stand out boldly and made the black nearly invisible, giving him and impressive unearthly look. He sat straight, brilliant eyes alert and thoughtful, ears pricked forward. He was not absent of blood. Tiny droplets glittered all over his pelt and on the tips of his claws like red water or jewels. None of the blood was his and it didn't all belong to one cat, either. He radiated health and strength and confidence. No doubt, he put the pathetic creature that was the soul to shame.

"I believe you called for me," said the newcomer with a smirk.

The two kits didn't seem as impressed by this cat as Darkpaw was. "You are the one who is responsible for the damage," they said.

"Only some of it," the newcomer said, puffing up with pride, "Some of that artwork is purely circumstantial."

"Who are you?" the kits asked.

"I'm Darkpaw, of course. Or at least, I'm who he wants to be, and who he will be soon," he answered.

"Why have you done this?" the kits asked, referring to the soul, "Why would you try to destroy the soul?"

"Because Darkpaw wants me to. It's the only way he can become me, and he really wants to become me. He even told me so."

"What?" Darkpaw said speaking for the first time since this encounter started. All eyes fell on him.

"In a dream," explained the newcomer.

"I don't remember you. And besides, that's just a dream," Darkpaw protested.

"Whether you remember me or not doesn't matter, what matters is that I was and I am. And what do you mean 'just a dream'? Don't you know that dreams are what show the mind's deepest desires? I am the very core of everything that you want for yourself. I am the one you want to take the place of this piece of shit soul you have. That's why I'm helping the world destroy it, because that's what you want to have happen," said the replica, "And I've almost done it, too. I just need a little extra push, and this thing is no more." He laughed and clawed the soul across its face.

Darkpaw flinched, feeling the blow that had been delivered though no one had touched him physically. The soul stayed silent but dropped heavily to the ground and the replica gave a disgusted snort, cleaning his claws on one of the few clean parts of the soul's pelt.

"We've seen enough," said the kits.

Darkpaw felt a crippling pain surge through his body again. His fur felt like it had been lit on fire and he felt as though his bones were being crushed as the two entities of his soul and the other were compressed back into his body. He couldn't breathe, but when he opened his eyes he was screaming. The kits were gone and Ghost was at his side, again. His heart thundered in his chest and he struggled to take deep gulps of air.

The wind kicked up again, carrying with it the voices of the cats. "It is too damaged. Nothing can be done. Send it away," they hissed.

"No!" Ghost cried, "There has to be something!"

"It has failed the test. Its soul is torn and its mind is fractured. Send it away," they hissed again.

"No! Listen to me! There has to…" Ghost was cut off by a sudden gust of wind that knocked her off her paws. She laid on her back, her limbs contracting and her body jerking. Her eyes were closed and her mouth was wide open as she let out a long scream of pain.

"Ghost!" Darkpaw cried, but his voice was drowned out when the wind reached storm-like speeds.

"YOU DARE CHALLENGE US! YOU BRING THE INJURED TO US AND BEG FOR THEIR LIVES AND WE SAVE THEM, DO WE NOT? DO YOU THINK WE DO THIS FOR YOU? OUR MISSION IS NOT YOURS TO LEAD OR CONTROL! HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN THAT?" roared the voices in a deafening crescendo, "REMEMBER YOUR PLACE, GHOST!" The last part was a warning, and a frightening one.

"Darkpaw…run!" Ghost ordered.

Darkpaw wanted to go to her, but she ordered him again, loud enough to contend with the volume of the voices. "LEAVE HER ALONE!" Darkpaw screamed, but he, too was knocked to the ground.

"FOOLISH KIT! YOU THINK YOU WOULD HAVE ANYMORE LUCK IN DEFYING US?"

Darkpaw couldn't breathe. Some invisible weight was crushing his lungs and his windpipe.

"LET HIM GO! PLEASE, JUST LET HIM GO!" Ghost begged, "I'LL DO WHATEVER YOU WANT! I'M SORRY!"

Darkpaw was released and he ran from the clearing in blind terror. The wind was almost impossible to run through and he felt his muscles threatening to rip free of his bones. With a desperate leap, he broke free of the chokehold of the clearing. Somehow, outside of the clearing was perfectly still and he shot off into the forest straight back into ShadowClan territory, refusing to stop until he finally buried himself in his nest. For the first time in a while, he dug out the old squirrel's bone and clutched it to his chest, panting heavily and shaking.

/

"_Darkpaw."_

_Darkpaw spun around, heart racing. His normally clear sky was completely black, the stars blocked out so he could see nothing. A pair of eyes shone in the darkness and he cautiously approached. A large blaze sprang up in front of him, lighting the dreamscape, and he stepped back quickly. The light from the fire lit the figure the glinting eyes belonged to._

"_Ghost," Darkpaw sighed, "Are you ok?"_

"_I'm fine," Ghost said._

_Darkpaw did not like that this fire separated him from her. Every time he tried to step around it, it would flare out and block his path. "What happened?" he asked._

"_Nothing. That isn't important right now," Ghost said._

"_I disagree," Darkpaw said._

"_Darkpaw, listen, I don't have much time," Ghost said urgently._

_Darkpaw frowned, "Your friends didn't seem to like me very much."_

"_They're just strict. I think I have a way for you to prove yourself to them."_

"_Ghost, is this really that important?" Darkpaw asked._

"_Yes," Ghost affirmed._

_Darkpaw sighed, "Ok, how?"_

"_The major problem they had with you was that you're murderous," Ghost began._

"_I don't deny that," Darkpaw agreed._

"_But there's someone specific you want dead, isn't there?" Ghost continued._

_Darkpaw's face darkened. "Three someone's actually."_

"_Name them," Ghost ordered._

_Darkpaw was confused but didn't argue. "Frost, Honeydew, and Slash," he recited. Those names were burned into his memory._

"_Spare them," Ghost said._

_Darkpaw's eyes grew wide. "What?" he said in disbelief, "Do you understand what you're saying?"_

"_Yes, I do, that's why I said it. If you can show you have yourself controlled enough to not kill them, not even fight them, then perhaps the others will see that your mind and soul can be repaired."_

_Darkpaw was silent for a long moment. "Ghost…I don't know…"_

"_You've got to, Darkpaw! You can't expect to handle this destiny of yours on your own. It'll kill you," Ghost insisted._

"_I'm not exactly alone. I have…friends," Darkpaw said, looking into the blaze._

"_And do you think they'd approve of this any more than the others do?" Ghost asked._

"_They don't have to find out," Darkpaw said._

"_So am I to assume you're happy with what you saw today?" Ghost pressed._

_Darkpaw winced. He really hadn't liked what he'd seen at all. He'd known he was damaged, but not to quite that extent. And if what his other self had said was true, it would only get worse. He heaved a huge sigh. "I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if I can let them live."_

"_Stay away from the ring. The feelings will pass, I swear," Ghost said._

_Darkpaw was silent again. "Ok," he said at last, "I'll do it."_

_Ghost smiled. "I'll visit you and help," she promised._

_Darkpaw just nodded, still staring into the blaze until it disappeared…_

**Happy whatever the hell you celebrate. So it looks like Darkpaw is gonna give up his murdering…OR WILL HE? Dun dun duuuuuunnnn! Reviews will be given to Darkpaw as late Christmas presents!**


	28. Chapter 27

**This is my quickest update in a while, isn't it? Hm, probably won't last, though. Damn you, school!**

Tigerstripe exited the warriors' den slowly. It was just before dawn, the sun hadn't risen to glare on the frost covered ground, yet. He padded over to the fresh kill pile. As he'd expected, it was nonexistent. He'd have to be sure and triple his efforts with his hunting patrol today. With a final glance at where the pile should be, he changed his mind to quadruple. Darkflower's kits were due any day now. Darkflower would need to be strong to keep the kits strong. ShadowClan couldn't afford to loose kits and they needed apprentices. That…thing currently residing in the apprentices' den didn't count.

Tigerstripe hadn't come out into this chilly morning air just to watch the frost accumulate and then blind him when the sun came up. Windlegs had been admitted to Littlecloud's den several nights ago, something he'd been shocked to learn the day after. He should have known that very night, but he'd been so exhausted, he had just assumed she'd been hunting late when he returned. The next morning, he'd discovered her missing and been frantic until Thicketclaw informed him of her whereabouts. To learn that his sister had green cough had unsettled the tabby greatly. Were it not for the quarantine Littlecloud had order, Tigerstripe wouldn't have left the den. But today, the quarantine was to be lifted and Tigerstripe could at last see his sister. Making his way quickly to the medicine cat's den, Tigerstripe's eagerness died when he saw who had beaten him to the den. Darkpaw was sitting next to Windlegs's nest, talking to her calmly and hatred and anger flared up in Tigerstripe at the sight.

"Well, it's not like I really came in here because I was worried so much as I came in here to make sure you didn't get in here too late. I mean really, why didn't you come here yourself? Who knows what could have happened if Littlecloud didn't get to you in time…" Darkpaw was saying.

"Say whatever it takes to make yourself feel better, Darkpaw. I know you came in here just because you missed me," Windlegs teased.

Darkpaw sputtered for a moment. "Did not!" he denied.

"Hey, you, get away from my sister. She needs her rest," Tigerstripe hissed as he approached the two.

Windlegs gave him an annoyed look and rolled her eyes. "Rest is all I've _been _getting in here. I've had about all the rest I can take," she said, "Besides, I like the company."

Tigerstripe scowled. "You can get better company than _him_."

"She probably could, but of everyone here, I'm the best option," Darkpaw shot with a cocky look.

Tigerstripe's scowl deepened. How in Hell this rouge had managed to get any friends at all was a mystery to him, but why did Darkpaw have to go and taint his sister? Couldn't the bastard have left well enough alone with his own band of misfits? No, of course not. He wouldn't be happy until he'd brought ShadowClan down and then who knew what he was going to do next. Tigerstripe never been very close friends with Mudriver or Thundertail, but at least those two had been likable enough before _he _came along.

"I've told you before. Stay. Away. From. My. Sister." The warning was emphasized by a flexing of Tigerstripe's claws.

Darkpaw looked unimpressed. He glanced down at Tigerstripe's claws and smirked, getting to his paws. "Those are some pretty long claws you have there, Tiger…stripe. What do you suppose that says about you?" he said before striding out, giving off an endless wave of obnoxious confidence that he didn't deserve.

"Why did you have to go and do that for?" Windlegs sighed.

"What?" Tigerstripe asked, looking back down at her.

"Why are you always so mean to him?" Windlegs asked.

Tigerstripe's jaw dropped. What exchange had _she _been watching? "I'm not 'mean' to him, Windlegs. I'm just cautious. You don't know what he's capable of."

"Oh, so big strong Tigerstripe has to protect his fragile sister from being hurt…by an apprentice, no less?"

"Yes…No!" Tigerstripe quickly changed his answer, but it was too late. Windlegs was on her paws and glaring at him.

"Let me tell you something, _brother_, and pay DAMN good attention. I'm capable of taking care of myself and I always have been. I don't need you looking out for me. Why don't you keep looking after your girlfriend, Thicketclaw?" Windlegs seethed.

"Thicketclaw isn't my girlfriend," Tigerstripe said quietly.

Windlegs continued, apparently not hearing him. "And furthermore, of the two of us, _I'm _the only one who's ever bothered trying to get to know Darkpaw at all. So don't start thinking you know him better than I do because you don't."

Tigerstripe sighed and looked away. His annoyance with Windlegs quickly faded, he hated fighting with her, but she would probably stay annoyed with him until he diverted her attention. Sighing again, he looked back at her. She'd settled back into her nest and was idly grooming herself. "Are you at least feeling better?" he asked.

Windlegs looked up at him. "Yes, fine. I always was," she responded.

Tigerstripe nodded, as if she'd ever admit to feeling sick. "Littlecloud said, if you're healthy enough, you can come to the gathering tonight."

"I've already been cleared. Everyone has," Windlegs said, paying her brother very little attention.

"Good. Good," Tigerstripe said, but could really think of nothing more.

"Would you two shut it, already?" came an annoyed voice from a few nests over.

"Why don't you go crawl under a rock? I'm sure no one would bother you then," Tigerstripe snapped.

"Don't you snap at me. As soon as Littlecloud turns me loose from here, I'll show you what being a warrior really is," hissed Snaketail.

"Is getting beaten by Mudriver part of what being a warrior really is? Having my own nephew turn on me?" Tigerstripe bit back.

"Don't you mention that traitor's name in my presence! As far as I'm concerned, he and that bitch sister of his are just as bad as the rouge. They're no family of mine," Snaketail said.

"Don't talk about Thundertail and Mudriver like that! They're better warriors than you ever were," Windlegs hissed, "And no doubt Darkpaw will be the same."

"I'm still a warrior and will be for a very long time. If you love that traitor's bastard so much, why don't you mate with it and have little demon kits with it? Start your own little breed of scum to-"

"ENOUGH!" Tigerstripe shouted, cutting Snaketail off. He was shaking with rage and his claws were fully unsheathed. "You say another thing like that about my sister and I'll personally make sure that you never say anything ever again!"

"She'll be in the elders' den before nightfall and she knows it. That's what has her so riled up. Leave the unhappy bitch to her misery, Tigerstripe. She's not worth it," Windlegs said, standing and gently pressing her shoulder to her brother's to sooth him.

It didn't work. Tigerstripe was still ready to claw Snaketail to bits. "I don't care what the stick up her ass is. She'll not insult my family just because she has none of her own to make miserable. Thank StarClan that pathetic kit of hers died before he could become tainted with her hatefulness."

Snaketail let out a screech and looked ready to launch herself at Tigerstripe, injured or not. Thankfully, Littlecloud stepped in before anyone could make another move.

"Alright that's enough. All of you. I step out for five minutes and you're already trying to keep yourselves in here longer. StarClan, one would think you were all from warring clans the way you go at it. Snaketail you stay there and be quiet. Windlegs, same goes for you. Tigerstripe, I do believe there's a vacant spot in the dawn hunting patrol with your name on it. You'd better get going, Russetfur's leading it and she doesn't like to be kept waiting, as you know," the medicine cat said firmly.

Snaketail and Windlegs settled down. Tigerstripe slowly relaxed himself and touched his nose to his sister's flank before stalking out of the den.

"There you are!" Russetfur snapped, "And here I was about to send a search party after you. What is it with you and wandering off lately?"

"I was visiting Windlegs," Tigerstripe explained.

"Well, she'll still be there when we get back, I'm sure. And if she isn't, that means Littlecloud released her. Either way, you'll see her again. You don't have to make the patrol wait for you. Especially now when-"

"Ok, ok, I get it!" Tigerstripe said, cutting into Russetfur's rant. That was a dangerous thing to do, but Russetfur was already impatient to get the patrol moving and so let it slide.

Tigerstripe hung toward the back of the patrol, something he was doing a lot more lately. Thicketclaw and Speckledthorn, who were both on the patrol as well, didn't seem to notice. In fact, Thicketclaw was noticing Tigerstripe a lot less lately, especially compared to when they were apprentices. That was just as well with Tigerstripe because he didn't have nearly as much interest in her anymore either. As for Speckledthorn…Tigerstripe could never be sure whether Speckledthorn noticed everything or nothing. The calico always allowed things to slip by unless he was requested. Tigerstripe was fairly certain that nothing short of a badger gnawing Tigerstripe's leg off would cause Speckledthorn to interfere in his life before he was asked.

"Hey, Speckledthorn, could you keep it down. I'm pretty sure your clumsiness is what made all the prey go away," Boulder teased over his shoulder when Speckledthorn accidentally stepped on a twig hidden under the snow and snapped it.

"I dunno, Boulder, maybe it was just your ugly face that scared them away," Speckledthorn teased back and Boulder laughed.

"Hey, could you two she-cats break up the love fest so we can get some hunting done?" Russetfur broke in.

"What's the matter, Russetfur? Feeling left out?" Boulder joked.

Russetfur eyed the senior warrior. "You're not exactly my type, Boulder. I prefer toms that aren't on their way to the elders' den."

"Ouch! I am not! Thicketclaw, did you hear what she just said about your mentor?" Boulder said, looking to his former apprentice.

Thicketclaw shrugged. "I can't reverse time. But Russetfur, you aren't so spry anymore yourself," she said to Boulder's amusement.

"Alright, enough clowning around. I'll have plenty of time to prove just how wrong you are, Thicketclaw, after the clan is fed," Russetfur said, "Patrol, move out."

The cats slipped off in search of prey, but Tigerstripe stayed where he was. Normally, he would have joined in on the playful banter, but his mind was elsewhere. The patrol had stopped near the Thunder Path, and he was currently looking out over it. He felt the desire to cross it. _'No,' _he told himself, _'You'll see her tonight.' _

When he looked forward again, he was startled to discover a pair of deep, green eyes staring back at him. He jumped before recognizing who the eyes belonged to. "Oh, Speckledthorn, I thought you'd gone off already," Tigerstripe said. Speckledthorn kept staring at him and Tigerstripe was starting to feel uneasy. "What are you looking at?" he asked. "I think we should start hunting. The clan needs food."

Speckledthorn stepped back and then finally took off into the grass in a flash.

Tigerstripe breathed a sigh of relief. He knew what Speckledthorn had been doing, why he'd been staring at him. It had been an invitation. Speckledthorn knew something was up and was giving Tigerstripe a chance to tell him what it was. Tigerstripe had declined and so Speckledthorn had left. Tigerstripe wondered again whether Speckledthorn could see nothing…or everything.

The patrol didn't find much, but as their contributions were the only ones that had been made to the pile so far, they were appreciated. Tigerstripe took nothing for himself.

"Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey get over here," Blackstar called from his perch in a tree.

The clan gathered around. Tigerstripe, curious about what was going on, walked over and sat in the front. His curiosity increased when he saw Snaketail also sitting in the front, a deep scowl on her face.

"As you all know, Snaketail was injured some time ago. It was unknown whether she would recover," Blackstar began.

"Just get on with it, damn it!" Snaketail shouted.

Blackstar rolled his eyes. "For StarClan's sake can you just shut up for two minutes?" he hissed, "Fine. Snaketail, I have spoken with Littlecloud and we have agreed that you are unfit to return to the warriors' den. You are to be moved to the-"

"NO!" Snaketail cried and Tigerstripe gritted his teeth as her voice blared through his ears. "You can't do this to me!"

"Snaketail, you can't even walk straight," Littlecloud said.

"Yes, I can!" Snaketail shouted. She heaved herself onto her paws, temporarily loosing balance and stumbled into a warrior sitting beside her. Using them as leverage, she righted herself and attempted to walk forward. As soon as she lost contact with the cat she'd been using as a brace, her hind legs bent and eventually gave out despite her hardest attempts at holding them steady.

A few cats snickered. "Shut up," Blackstar warned them. "Snaketail, you've fulfilled your duty as a warrior. Even if you weren't injured I'd recommend you to retire."

"There's no shame in being an elder. Soon enough, you'll be a warrior in StarClan for all time," Runningnose said.

"You shut up, you old fool," Snaketail hissed at the former medicine cat before rounding on Blackstar again. "You can't do this to me! StarClan won't allow it! Oakbelly will have them strike you down before he lets you do this to me!"

"Damn Oakbelly. Damn StarClan. And damn you!" Blackstar hissed.

Tigerstripe caught a disapproving and slightly shocked look Littlecloud shot Blackstar for his words and didn't blame him. No warrior should say such things about StarClan or a warrior of StarClan, especially not a leader.

Snaketail looked up at Blackstar, almost stunned. Then her eyes narrowed and she searched over the crowd of cats until they landed on Mudriver. "You! You did this to me!" she screamed and tried to launch herself at the grey warrior, but several others held her back. She didn't quit fighting, still quite formidable and determined even without her hind legs. "And that damned bastard! He planted the thought in his head!" she cried, now targeting Darkpaw.

"ENOUGH!" Blackstar shouted, "My decision is final. Go the elders' den or…"Blackstar trailed off before the end. "Russetfur, announce who's going to the gathering," he said, now calm before leaping down.

Littlecloud stepped forward. "StarClan will smile on you for the service you provided to your clan, Snaketail. You deserve to rest now. You will have forever to serve as a warrior for StarClan," he comforted. Or at least, he tried to comfort her.

Snaketail just spat in his face. "Save your sentiments for someone who gives a rat's ass." With some help, Snaketail was taken to the elders' den while Russetfur announced those who would be attending the gathering.

Tigerstripe didn't like the idea of bringing Darkpaw, again. Last time hadn't gone so well…ok so he was partly responsible for that, but he'd only been ensuring the truth got out! This time, Blackstar would be announcing the arrival of the two new kits in the nursery. No doubt, Darkpaw would be given some credit for the rescue. Leaving the meeting place behind, Tigerstripe set out to find Windlegs. He briefly noticed Darkpaw out of the corner of his eye. The smaller tabby looked slightly shaken, staring down at his paws wide-eyed. Tigerstripe wondered for a moment what could be his problem, but he shrugged it off in favor of another thought. He'd be seeing _her_ tonight.

/

"I think I'll tell them about that hawk I took down the other day," Thicketclaw said. She'd been suggesting stories to tell at the gathering to impress the other warriors. Though she'd been a warrior at the last gathering, she had been one for so short a time, she hadn't been able to do any 'miraculous or impressive feats' before-hand to brag about. This time, she was desperate to say something impressive.

"You didn't take down any hawk," Speckledthorn said.

"They don't need to know that. Besides, I'm good enough to take one down," Thicketclaw retorted.

"Why don't you tell the truth about something impressive you did," Speckledthorn suggested.

"Because I haven't done anything nearly as impressive as you have," Thicketclaw replied.

"What did I do?" Speckledthorn asked with a confused look.

"Don't you remember what Boulder said? You scared off all the prey in the forest all by yourself!" Thicketclaw laughed.

"We agreed that it was actually Boulder's fault, remember? Tigerstripe remembers, don't you?" Speckledthorn asked, turning to the tabby.

Tigerstripe snapped back into reality. "Huh? What?" he asked.

"Jeez, you've been zoning out a lot lately. You getting enough sleep?" Thicketclaw asked.

"I guess not. Probably because you snore too loudly," he joked with a grin that almost felt forced. He had to act normal.

Thicketclaw nudged him playfully, pretending to be offended. She bought it the act, but Speckledthorn was giving Tigerstripe another piercing look. He still suspected something, now more than ever, probably.

Tigerstripe was saved from the look when Russetfur announced that it was time to go to the gathering. Struggling not to look too eager, Tigerstripe went over to join the others.

/

ShadowClan was the last clan to arrive. Blackstar quickly joined the other leaders and ShadowClan warriors dispersed into small groups. Tigerstripe caught Mudriver and Thundertail go to the back of the clearing with Darkpaw. Upon seeing the trio, the other warriors gave them a wide berth. Tigerstripe joined Thicketclaw, Speckledthorn, and Windlegs near the front.

"…and it screeched and flapped its wings, but I was too strong for it," Thicketclaw was telling a ThunderClan warrior. He was Tawnypelt's brother, Brambleclaw. He looked amused, but based on the glance he gave his sister, he wasn't necessarily buying the story. Speckledthorn was just shaking his head with a smile on his face. Thicketclaw actually told the story quite well even though it was false.

Tigerstripe didn't pay much attention to the story. He was searching for the faces of Dawnpaw and Nightshade who were usually sitting here waiting for them. His eyes finally fell on Dawnpaw and her eyes locked with his. She was sitting beside her mentor and gave Tigerstripe a worried look and glanced at Leopardstar. Tigerstripe looked up at Leopardstar, too, and noticed the female leader's look of anger directed at the ShadowClan leader.

"Oh no," Tigerstripe whispered. All the RiverClan cats were keeping their distance from ShadowClan.

"What?" Windlegs asked.

"Nothing," Tigerstripe said quickly, a bit too quickly. "Just thinking out loud, I guess." Windlegs gave him a suspicious look, but turned to the great rock when the gathering started. Tigerstripe still felt eyes on him and glanced over his shoulder to find Speckledthorn, again, gazing at him. The green eyes flashed over to Dawnpaw, then back up to the leaders. Tigerstripe's heart beat rapidly as Firestar and Tallstar took their turns.

Blackstar stepped up confidently. "ShadowClan have taken in two more kits," he announced. He glanced at Leopardstar. He'd expected her to say something along the lines of 'More rouges?' or 'And how long have you been hiding _these _ones?', but the RiverClan leader remained silent. "They were rescued from drowning during a storm. Darkpaw was the one who found them. If it hadn't been for him, they might have died. Tigerstripe helped to save them. Unfortunately, one died not long after we got it to camp, but the surviving two are staying with a queen in the nursery and will become ShadowClan apprentices when they are old enough."

Firestar said something like praise about Darkpaw and Tigerstripe, but Tigerstripe didn't really hear him. His eyes were focused on Leopardstar. She stepped forward last, glancing at Blackstar as she passed him. She announced that Dawnpaw had now become a warrior named Dawnlegs which Tigerstripe was pleased to hear, but was then distracted by the dark tone Leopardstar adopted for what she said next.

"I see ShadowClan is continuing to grow in size. With leaf-bare upon us, prey is surely scarce. Tell me, Blackstar, do you think that would justify invading another clan's territory?" Leopardstar asked, her eyes blazing on the white tom.

"Excuse me?" Blackstar asked with a frown.

"It's a simple question, Blackstar. I know you heard me," Leopardstar said coolly.

"Alright, I'll play your game. No, I don't think that justifies going onto another clan's territory. That's why I don't allow my warriors to do it," Blackstar said.

"Ah, is that so?" Leopardstar inquired.

"Yes," Blackstar said, barely above a hiss, "That's so."

"Then perhaps you can tell me, Blackstar, why it is that one of my patrols discovered the scent of a ShadowClan warrior on RiverClan territory? Care to explain the tracks leading both to and from Fourtrees that also carried the scent? We aren't mistaken, Blackstar. RiverClan know the scent of ShadowClan as well as you know it yourselves," Leopardstar challenged.

"So you're saying you believe I'm sending warriors into your territory to steal prey. Is that it?" Blackstar said.

"That or you have a renegade in your midst," Leopardstar said.

"That's ridiculous. ShadowClan don't steal prey. Not under my lead. And even if we did, wouldn't it make more sense to go onto one of the neighboring territories instead of cutting through into RiverClan?" Blackstar said.

"ShadowClan can't hunt on the moors to save their skins. I know, you've tried, remember? And I doubt you would want to try to cross a clan nearly twice your size. We all know ShadowClan are familiar with RiverClan territory. Even you yourself have been in there on numerous occasions. It makes perfect sense to me," Leopardstar explained.

"This is insanity. I haven't ordered any of my warriors onto RiverClan territory or any other territory and I know of none who are doing so," Blackstar said.

"Very well, I'll give you an offer. The sunset after next, you meet me on the border of RiverClan territory. Either bring with you the warrior or warriors responsible for these invasions, or expect a war," Leopardstar said.

"And what do you propose to do with this warrior or warriors should I present them to you?" Blackstar asked suspiciously.

"You allow me to give them all one blow a piece and give me your word it will never happen again and I'll forget the whole thing ever happened. However, if you give me your word and it does happen again, RiverClan will not rest until we've taken the lives of every one of your warriors that is responsible," Leopardstar said.

Blackstar gave Leopardstar a critical look. "How do I know you won't just kill my warriors when you take the blow?"

Leopardstar grinned. "You don't, but of the two of us, who do you think is more trustworthy?"

"Don't try to paint yourself as a saint, Leopardstar. Don't forget, I know you very well, too," Blackstar growled.

"Either way, you can accept the terms I've laid out, or you can bring upon yourself and your clan yet another war. You have two days. See you then, Blackstar," Leopardstar said and jumped down without allowing Blackstar to give a response. She strolled out of the clearing with her clan behind her, most of them shooting dirty looks back at the ShadowClan warriors.

Tigerstripe's heart was no longer thudding in his chest. It had dropped down into his stomach and was now being dissolved by his stomach acids. He looked after the RiverClan cats, catching Dawnlegs shoot a worried look back at him. That wasn't a look he liked seeing on the usually carefree she-cat. ShadowClan left the clearing soon after.

That night, Tigerstripe had difficulty sleeping. He couldn't think of what to do. He didn't want the clans to go to war, but he couldn't reveal his secret. Not just because what he had done was against the warrior code, but for a far more complicated reason. Unable to sleep and feeling overheated amongst all the bodies in the den, Tigerstripe carefully picked his way out of the den.

The cold air outside sent a welcome shock to his system and he took another deep breath. The camp was quiet. The guards seemed more alert than usual, probably due to the sudden threat of war. How quickly the mood of an entire clan could change. ShadowClan, as always, had entered the gathering bursting with confidence and contentment. But tonight, the threat of yet another war had been thrown upon them just when everything was beginning to get back on track.

Guilt flooded Tigerstripe's senses. He didn't feel guilty about the threat. He felt guilty about not feeling guilty about the threat. He loved his clan, it was true. He was loyal to Blackstar, yes. He was a good warrior. He'd fight beside ShadowClan in anything. But this single flaw threatened to make his whole world collapse. It wasn't fair. Darkpaw, that damned rouge, could get away with all his crimes, all his flaws. Why couldn't he, Tigerstripe, have this one thing?

Tigerstripe turned when he felt eyes on him. He was no longer surprised to see a pair of bright green eyes watching him. Speckledthorn again, seeing everything or nothing. Tigerstripe was beginning to suspect Speckledthorn saw everything because he'd never felt more exposed in his life. He was beginning to think Speckledthorn had figured it all out, but wouldn't do anything until Tigerstripe admitted it to him. And what would Speckledthorn do if Tigerstripe told him? Probably tell him what he needed to hear. Tell him the best course of action. Tell him what he needed to do. But Tigerstripe said nothing and the eyes disappeared.

/

The next morning, Blackstar didn't act out of the ordinary. He didn't send out extra patrols or even check to make sure all warriors were accounted for. He didn't even ask for the perpetrator or perpetrators to reveal themselves. For a long time, Tigerstripe wondered about this. Then, realization hit him like an ice covered rock. Blackstar had already decided to go to war. The next night, Blackstar was going to lead his warriors to the RiverClan border and challenge the leader herself. Tigerstripe wasn't the only one who hated this plan.

"Blackstar, I really have to protest this plan of action," he heard Russetfur whisper to Blackstar.

"You've never been one to back down from a fight before," Blackstar told his deputy calmly.

"For StarClan's sake, Blackstar, you're talking about an all out war with RiverClan! Over what? A warrior or two crossing the border? It's not worth it! Just figure out who the deviants are and be done with it," Russetfur reasoned.

"A blow a piece. She wants to strike my warriors. That's an act of war in my book so the way I see it, going directly into battle just ensures we start at a hundred percent," Blackstar said.

Tigerstripe didn't hear the end of the conversation. He didn't have to. He knew that once Blackstar made this decision, it wouldn't be changed.

Even though he probably shouldn't have, that night Tigerstripe snuck out of the camp and across the Thunder Path. He adopted his clan's traits well, despite his light coloring. He was merely a shadow moving through the forest. But this shadow didn't realize that another shadow was following him.

When Tigerstripe reached the oak that marked the end of ShadowClan territory he stopped. Part of him dared not go any farther. A few more yards and he'd reach the oak that marked RiverClan's territory. Just a pace more and he'd have entered the territory. That was what had caused this mess in the first place. Taking that one damned pace and then another and then another.

On the other side of the clearing, the bushes moved and Tigerstripe ducked down out of sight until he saw who the newcomer was. A grey she-cat stepped out cautiously and looked around the clearing. This time Tigerstripe stepped out and made himself known to her. The RiverClan she-cat rushed toward him and he to her. He pressed his nose to her flank and she to his and they purred in the comfort of each others' presence.

"Why didn't you tell me you were a warrior?" Tigerstripe asked.

"I wanted it to be a surprise," Dawnlegs said.

Tigerstripe fell silent. And what a surprise the entire gathering had been. He didn't want to think about it, but he knew he had to. They needed to discuss it. But who was going to be brave enough to bring it up first?

"What are we going to do?" Dawnlegs whispered, breaking the silence first.

Tigerstripe sighed and lowered his head to Dawnlegs's stomach which was bloated slightly with the promises of a litter. Tigerstripe's litter. "I could accept the blow," Tigerstripe said.

Dawnlegs shook her head. "If Leopardstar doesn't kill you, she'll surely cripple you. And what would Blackstar do when he found out? Neither of our leaders is known for being forgiving. And no one will know who sired these kits. What if they suspect…" she trailed off.

"They wouldn't be the first half-clans born in the forest. Tigerstar is gone, now. His genocide is over. Forgiving or not, Leopardstar wouldn't kill kits," Tigerstripe assured her.

"But would she kill you?" Dawnlegs asked, but it was mostly rhetorical.

'And if she doesn't, will Blackstar kill me?' Tigerstripe thought. "I'll not have our kits born during a war," he said firmly.

"Would you have them grow up fatherless?" Dawnlegs asked.

Tigerstripe looked at the ground. "They'll already be fatherless," he said.

Dawnlegs pressed against him for comfort and he pressed against her for the same reason.

"Blackstar isn't even asking who did it. He's already decided to go to war," Tigerstripe admitted.

"Then it's already begun," Dawnlegs said.

"Not yet. It won't have begun until one of the leaders strikes the other or orders an attack. If I can figure something out before then, it'll be stopped," Tigerstripe told her, but he didn't sound as confident as he had hoped.

Dawnlegs looked up at him. "If only that patrol hadn't been coming, I could have hidden your scent and your tracks in time."

"Hey, it's not your fault," Tigerstripe whispered. "I'll find a way to end this, just wait and see. And don't worry too much; it's not good for the kits."

"None of this is good for the kits," Dawnlegs pointed out. "It'll be light soon. You need to go. I hate it when you need to go."

Tigerstripe's brow creased with sympathy. "I hate it, too," he said. He licked Dawnlegs's forehead and pressed his nose to hers for a few moments before backing toward his own border. "I'll figure something out, I swear," he said before dashing into the forest.

/

Tigerstripe didn't know that he wasn't alone in his mad dash back to camp. He didn't know, couldn't have known, that someone did see him. His secret was out, and yet he'd told no one. Certain things aren't meant to be hidden.

/

The next day was not quite as laid back as the previous one. It was clear that Blackstar was now preparing for war. He wanted as many of the warriors fed as possible. The aura around the camp was one of unease and aggression. Tigerstripe was only affected by the unease. Blackstar had taken Darkpaw out to train today, no doubt wanting to ensure the single apprentice could handle himself in battle. Tigerstripe didn't want to have to ever fight beside Darkpaw. All the more reason for him to think quickly. Unfortunately, for all his quick thinking, all he got was: the only way to end a fight without fighting is by talking. The problem was, he wasn't a gifted talker and he couldn't expect someone else to talk for him without letting them in on why he wanted this conflict ended so badly. To make matters doubly impossible, it was obvious that the decisions of neither of the leaders could be swayed.

All too soon, it was nearly sunset and Blackstar rounded up most of the warriors along with Darkpaw to make the trek to the RiverClan border. Tigerstripe kept thinking. He wracked his brain the entire way, but it was as though someone had stolen all the thoughts from his head.

As the ShadowClan army reached the RiverClan border, it was clear that Leopardstar, too, had prepared for battle. Like Blackstar had done, Leopardstar brought with her no medicine cat. There was no option of peace. The RiverClan warriors fanned out face-to-face with the ShadowClan warriors.

Tigerstripe needed more time. He thought his prayers were answered as the leaders began to talk.

"Ah, Blackstar, with all these fancy warriors, did you bring me the villain?" Leopardstar said casually.

"The only villain I see here is you, Leopardstar. This ground has seen too much bloodshed. Go back to your camp and let me deal with my warriors myself," Blackstar said.

"How can I trust you to do the job properly? My territory has been invaded, Blackstar, whether by your order or not. My clan feels angry and violated. Blood must be spilt. I've left the amount up to you. Bring the criminal forward and this can all be over now."

"I'm not going to do that. I'm starting to think you _want_ to start a war with ShadowClan. What I can't figure out is: why? Is it that you feel this will redeem you of the alliance you made with Tigerstar? Will challenging your old allies make you feel less guilty about Stonefur's death?" Blackstar asked.

Tigerstripe knew right then that his prayers had not been answered. What this had been was merely a contest to see who would strike the first blow and who would then be given the justification. Blackstar's final comment was meant to bring Leopardstar into such a fury that she would strike first, and it was working.

Leopardstar's claws extended in rage. "YOU KILLED STONEFUR!" she shrieked and sliced her claws through the air for a punishing blow.

Before any cat could blink, a small silver and black body jumped in front of Blackstar right in the path of Leopardstar's swipe. Her claws struck it and it fell to the ground at Blackstar's paws. No cat moved. They simply stared at the figure in a dead silence.

Darkpaw lay panting on the ground, shaking slightly from the force of the blow. He looked up at Leopardstar, a deep gash cut straight across his muzzle. A drop of blood slipped down his nose and hit the ground, soon followed by several more.

"It was me," Darkpaw announced, his speech slightly slurred. "I'm the one who went onto RiverClan territory. I wanted to see if I could catch a fish. I've been curious about them since I first started my training. I figured that now, when prey was so scarce for ShadowClan, it would be the best time. That way I wouldn't have to take prey from the pile."

Leopardstar stared down at him. The imagery was complete. The silver tabby lay on the ground, bloodied. Blackstar stood beside him. All they needed was a struggling blue-grey tom beneath them. And that cut, its placement. It sent a mental shiver down Leopardstar's spine. It couldn't be coincidence.

Blackstar's voice cut through her thoughts. "There, you've had your blow. You have your blood. More to fertilized this forsaken soil with. Here's my word that this won't happen again. Now go back to your camp, the bargain's been carried out," he said.

Leopardstar looked up at him, meeting his eyes for a moment, before regaining her wits. She stood up straight and replenished her air of confidence. "Of course, Blackstar, I'm nothing if not a cat of my word. RiverClan, return to camp." RiverClan turned to go and Leopardstar dipped her head before turning with them.

ShadowClan followed Blackstar back to their own territory. Tigerstripe lingered for a moment, catching Dawnlegs's eye before she disappeared with her clan. He looked over and saw that Speckledthorn had lingered, too. Saying nothing, the two toms moved to follow their clanmates.

Just ahead of them were Thundertail, Mudriver, and Darkpaw. Mudriver was helping Darkpaw keep his balance since the blow had no doubt rattled the tabby's brain. He'd need to see Littlecloud for sure.

"Have you really been sneaking onto RiverClan territory?" Tigerstripe heard Thundertail ask.

"It doesn't matter, Leopardstar thinks I was," Darkpaw replied.

Tigerstripe didn't care so much about Darkpaw's injury. The blood of a traitor's son was hardly a major loss. But he still felt bad. Surely, there was something he could have done to avoid this whole mess. He looked to Speckledthorn, hoping his friend would see that he needed comfort.

Speckledthorn stared at the ground directly in front of him. He refused to look at Tigerstripe. He's seen everything…

**So, a chapter that follows Tigerstripe. This one was fun! I feel like I've been neglecting my poor antagonist. Anyway, you know the drill. Reviews make Darkpaw happy…Well, actually, seeing as this chapter is about Tigerstripe, they should probably make Tigerstripe happy. But, he's pretty happy by comparison…Ok I got it. Reviews will have the option of making Tigerstripe and/or Darkpaw happy. There we go!**


	29. Chapter 28

**HELL YEAH! I'm on a roll! Hope you have a lot of free time for this chapter.**

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Snowkit-white she-cat. Daughter of Darkflower.**

**Wildkit-brown and black she-cat. Daughter of Darkflower.**

**Mousekit-brown and white tom. Son of Darkflower.**

Blood. It was something Darkpaw was used to. He'd seen it flow from nearly every cat he knew. He'd seen it stain the ground and his own fur. It gushed. It dribbled. It tasted horrible. And it was messy. All these things, Darkpaw knew from experience. He'd had tons of experience ripping the dark red substance to the surface of many a pelt. What he didn't have experience with was having it flow from his own body. Only a couple of days ago, for the first time in his life, Darkpaw had bled. It had been…painful.

Leopardstar was not being merciful when she calculated that blow. Apparently, all her hatred focused into one blow was capable of ripping Darkpaw's nose open and giving him a concussion. That damned concussion was what was keeping Darkpaw trapped in Littlecloud's den. Having passed out soon after arriving back at camp, Darkpaw hadn't seen the world outside since then. Mudriver and Thundertail of course visited him and tried in vain to draw out of him why exactly he'd taken the hit. He refused to confirm whether or not he was indeed the one that had been going into RiverClan territory.

Darkpaw knew that in the entire forest, there were only three cats who knew who was truly responsible for the trouble. Tigerstripe, Dawnlegs, and himself, but neither Dawnlegs nor Tigerstripe knew that Darkpaw knew. They were completely unaware that Tigerstripe had not been alone in his visit four nights ago.

Once Darkpaw heard Leopardstar's accusation that Blackstar was ordering warriors onto RiverClan territory, he'd become curious. He knew that he was likely to be a prime suspect, but knew also that he'd never once set paw in RiverClan territory. Then, a thought struck him. Littlecloud had asked Darkpaw to check all of the warriors in the den to see if they had green cough. He hadn't paid much attention at the time, but he now realized that one warrior had been missing. Then he realized who that warrior was. Of course, it seemed like it should be impossible. Tigerstripe was much too committed to ShadowClan to dare cross the border. But perhaps that commitment was what drove him to it. After all, ShadowClan did need prey. But, if Tigerstripe were hunting in RiverClan territory, logically, there should have been more fresh kill on the pile. There wasn't. His curiosity keeping him awake the next night, Darkpaw saw a shadow leave the warriors' den and sneak into the forest. An expert at doing the exact same thing, Darkpaw had pursued. The scent was correct, Tigerstripe, but the logic was wrong. Then he'd seen her. The new RiverClan warrior: Dawnlegs. Tigerstripe pressed his nose to Dawnlegs's stomach and Darkpaw's interest shot up again. It couldn't be. It wasn't possible. He'd never used his gift for such a thing before, but Darkpaw shut his eyes and made out Dawnlegs's life signature. Within her, there were two tiny lives that could be nothing except kits. Darkpaw's heart had hammered in his chest when all the pieces finally fell into place. As he followed Tigerstripe back to camp, his mind went over multiple scenarios that would meet ShadowClan the following night.

Never once did Darkpaw plan to take the blow. He'd assumed that Tigerstripe would step up to it or that Blackstar would talk their way out of it. As time went on, however, Darkpaw realized how ridiculous both those situations would be. Tigerstripe wouldn't be foolish enough to step up and admit his purposes for entering RiverClan territory and claiming to have been hunting wouldn't be believable at all. And there was no way Blackstar was going to try to talk his way out of this battle, but he'd more than willingly talk his way into it. Darkpaw didn't want a war. A moment before Leopardstar raised her paw for the strike Darkpaw knew there was only one way he was going to stop this war. He was surprised he could come up with a believable story to tell while his head was spinning uncontrollably. He didn't feel the pain at first, but it became apparent when he felt the blood slide down his face.

Bleeding didn't bother Darkpaw. In fact, he found it fascinating. His own life was leaving his body. More times than he could count, Littlecloud had scolded him and replaced the bandage across his muzzle because Darkpaw frequently tore it off to allow the blood to flow freely again. Littlecloud tried various threats to try to deter Darkpaw from reopening his wound including reminding him that it would only make the scar he would soon have worse. But Darkpaw wasn't worried about a scar. At last, the only tactic that worked was warning Darkpaw that if he continued ripping the bandage off, he'd likely get an infection and have to stay in the den even longer if he didn't die.

Littlecloud was currently not in the den. The previous night, Darkflower had gone into labor and the medicine cat hadn't returned since. As dawn threatened to approach, Darkpaw was beginning to wonder if there were complications with the kits.

A figure suddenly appeared at the den entrance. It was too dark still for Darkpaw to see them properly.

"Littlecloud?" Darkpaw asked.

The figure said nothing but moved to the stash of herbs Littlecloud always kept well organized. Darkpaw quickly realized that this figure was much too big to be Littlecloud and wasn't familiar with the herbs. They picked out several herbs and then approached Darkpaw.

"Oh, Blackstar, it's you," Darkpaw said when the figure at last came into focus. He was a little concerned. Blackstar hadn't visited him at all during his stay in here, not even to question him about RiverClan. Darkpaw had assumed since he incriminated himself that Blackstar would surely punish him. But the look on Blackstar's face was not that of a disciplinarian when he dropped the herbs in front of Darkpaw.

"Eat these," he ordered flatly.

Darkpaw wasn't sure what to call the look on Blackstar's face, but it wasn't normal and Darkpaw didn't like it. "Why?" he asked.

"Just do it and meet me outside, quickly," Blackstar ordered and then left the den.

Darkpaw looked suspiciously after him then down at the herbs. He didn't want to eat anything he didn't understand, though his gift told him they weren't dangerous. Brushing the herbs to the side, Darkpaw stood, steadied himself, then left the den.

"Did you eat them?" Blackstar asked, glancing toward the nursery.

"Yeah," Darkpaw lied.

"Good, let's go," Blackstar said.

"Where are we going?" Darkpaw asked as he was led out of the camp. "Are you sure Littlecloud will be ok with me traveling?"

"You'll be fine," Blackstar said shortly. "Can you run straight?"

"Yes," Darkpaw said, growing uneasy. What the Hell was Blackstar planning to do with him?

"Good." Blackstar broke into a run and Darkpaw quickly followed.

The sun rose lazily at the horizon and Blackstar never broke stride. Darkpaw's head was beginning to throb from all the running, but he didn't say anything to Blackstar. He was becoming certain that his leader was not going to stop for anything. It was not until Darkpaw smelled the WindClan border that he finally stopped.

"Blackstar, that's the border! We aren't supposed to cross," Darkpaw protested.

Blackstar came to a halt and turned to the apprentice as though suddenly remembering he was there. "We can for this trip," Blackstar said.

"Are we invading WindClan?" Darkpaw asked.

"No, we're just passing through it. What we want is on the other side," Blackstar explained.

"What _we_ want? Blackstar, I have no idea where we're going and I don't like not knowing. Tell me or I'm not taking another step," Darkpaw said firmly, but felt his resolve threaten to slip when Blackstar gave him a hard look.

"Darkpaw, do you want to be a warrior?" Blackstar asked.

Darkpaw was surprised by the question. "Well, yeah," he said.

"Then you have to make this journey. You should feel honored, very few apprentices as young as you have made it. Now, let's go, unless you want to be an apprentice for your entire life," Blackstar said and trotted into WindClan territory.

Darkpaw hesitated, then followed. The cut through WindClan territory was quick and measured. Blackstar followed a specific path the entire way. Not daring to put a paw out of place. Darkpaw soon realized that this path held the scents of all the other clans. The sun was about to begin its decent out of the sky by the time WindClan territory ended. The two continued until the sun had descended some way before Darkpaw saw a two-leg nest in the distance.

"Blackstar, what is this place?" he asked.

"This is the home of a couple of loners, Barley and Ravenpaw. We'll rest here before continuing on to the Moonstone," Blackstar said without so much as a glance back to the apprentice.

They reached the barn quickly and Blackstar called in through the doorway. Soon, a plump, black and white tom appeared.

"Hey, Blackstar," he said happily, "I didn't expect to see you here for a while longer. I thought you said the last bunch were the last of you apprentices." Then his eyes fell on Darkpaw. Darkpaw waited to see the recognition flash in the loner's eyes along with fear or hatred, but it never happened. Instead the tom went on to say, "He's a small one."

"Well, he is a little young, but advanced," Blackstar said. "Do you have something for him to eat?"

"Of course. Ravenpaw should be back from hunting, soon. I'm sure there'll be plenty to share," the loner said, "Now come in, you two look like you've run a gauntlet."

Darkpaw caught Blackstar stiffen at the mention of the word 'gauntlet' and a quick apologetic look from the loner before the three of them entered the barn. This confused Darkpaw, but he'd figured out that he'd be getting very little information from Blackstar today.

"Allow me to introduce myself, apprentice, my name is Barley," the loner said, sitting comfortably on a pile of hay.

"Darkpaw," said the apprentice.

"Pleased to meet you, Darkpaw. Looks like you've got a cut on your nose, there," Barley pointed out.

"Training accident, nothing major," Blackstar said.

Just then, another tom entered the barn with two fat mice dangling from his jaws and muttering something about 'stupid, mangy dogs' under his breath. The late evening light shone on the black tom's pelt as he strolled in. He caught sight of the two visitors and jumped in surprise, dropping the mice.

"Look what Blackstar brought us, Ravenpaw, another apprentice," Barley announced.

"Oh," was all the black tom said. He seemed nervous to Darkpaw.

"His name is Darkpaw," Barley continued.

Ravenpaw was a clan name. A clan apprentice name. Darkpaw was certain this tom was much too old to be an apprentice.

"Hello, Darkpaw," Ravenpaw said, his eyes flashed over to Blackstar before he picked up the mice and carried them over to where Darkpaw and Barley were.

"Are you hungry, Darkpaw?" Barley asked.

"No," Darkpaw replied. He hadn't eaten all day and he should have been famished from the run, but he wasn't.

"You'd better eat. We aren't stopping on the way back and we still have a long way to go," Blackstar said, but he was focused on the sun outside, still not looking at Darkpaw.

The two loners began to eat, but Darkpaw refused everything offered to him. Blackstar didn't notice.

"Where's your mentor?" Ravenpaw asked suddenly. It was improbable that Darkpaw was Blackstar's apprentice since Windlegs had been and was so recently made a warrior.

Unsure how Blackstar wanted him to answer, Darkpaw responded, "Where's yours?"

Ravenpaw stiffened but Barley laughed. "Ravenpaw came here from ThunderClan," Barley explained.

"ThunderClan? Why did you leave? Aren't they something like the most popular clan in the forest?" Darkpaw asked.

"Clan life really wasn't for me," Ravenpaw said quietly. He spent most of the time looking at the ground, but every once in a while his eyes would flick over Darkpaw's coat, then settle on his eyes, then settle on the cut across his nose before focusing back on the ground and the hardly touched mouse at his paws.

"Who was your mentor?" Darkpaw asked. Ravenpaw's glances didn't go unnoticed by the tabby and it was natural for his suspicions to arise.

Ravenpaw was quiet for a long time. Darkpaw began thinking the black tom was going to refuse to answer. "I'll answer if you answer me one question in return," he offered.

"Deal," Darkpaw said.

"My mentor was Tigerstar, though he was Tigerclaw at the time. I left ThunderClan because I witnessed him murder the deputy and he was going to kill me…or at least have me killed," Ravenpaw said. He looked up and met Darkpaw's eyes and held them for the first time. "Who was your father?"

Darkpaw grinned. He'd expected the question. "I think you already know," he said.

"I answered you, you answer me," Ravenpaw insisted.

"You're right. Fair's fair," Darkpaw consented, "My father was Darkstripe. I'll even throw in that my mother was a BloodClan rouge who brought me to ShadowClan when I was a moon old because the other cats from BloodClan would have killed me. Now I have another question for you if you'll accept the same terms."

"I'll accept," Ravenpaw said.

"Now that you know who my father was, does that scare you, make you hate me? What I suppose I'm trying to say is, does my father's reputation precede me in your eyes? I know you must know very well who Darkstripe was," Darkpaw said.

Ravenpaw again met the tabby's eyes. "Yes, I know very well what Darkstripe was. The answer to your question is no. You are a ShadowClan apprentice. Nothing more, nothing less."

"Interesting," Darkpaw said.

"Now for my question: What did you think my answer would be?"

"You seem fond of asking questions you know the answer to. I expected you to say 'yes'. I expected you to hate or fear me the moment you saw me."

"Why?" Ravenpaw asked.

"Darkpaw, it's time to go," Blackstar called from the door.

"Ah, Ravenpaw, there you go asking questions like that again," Darkpaw said with a grin before turning and following his leader out of the barn.

It was nearly sundown by the time the mountain the Moonstone was located in came into view. The moon was on the rise by the time they reached it. Blackstar fearlessly entered a small cave, disappearing into the blackness. Darkpaw hesitated.

"Hurry," Blackstar called back, "You don't want to get lost in here."

Darkpaw slipped in after his leader. The tunnel was small and Darkpaw didn't like it. The path wound and turned and twisted, making Darkpaw uneasy, but it was all the more incentive to stay close behind Blackstar. The tunnel eventually widened out into a large cave with a small hole near the top and a large boulder in the center. The boulder was smooth and stood tall and proud in the darkness, radiating the dim light of the stars overhead.

"What are you doing?" Darkpaw asked when Blackstar went over and laid down next to the stone.

"I'm going to share tongues with StarClan. You just stay in here. You'll be safe," Blackstar said. He pressed his nose to the stone and shut his eyes. The moon climbed to a point in the sky so it was visible through the hole in the rock overhead. The stone reflected the light brightly and it shone through the cavern.

Darkpaw's fur stood on end and he was tempted to run, but rooted his paws in place determinedly. His eyes adjusted to the light as he looked around. The comfortable shadows were almost all gone, but were still creeping around in the corners of the space. Blackstar's body relaxed and Darkpaw knew instantly that his leader was asleep.

/

_Blackstar stood patiently in the center of the starry clearing. StarClan certainly deserved its name. Though he'd never told anyone, Blackstar didn't particularly like these visits. He found StarClan eerie and not nearly as beautiful as the others who had seen it described. Still, he needed to speak with StarClan and he needed to do it now. He didn't have long to wait. Soon two toms appeared. One was thin and a deep black despite the glittering stars in his pelt, the other was a dark brown tabby._

"_Raggedstar, Nightstar, it's good to see you," he said, though his tone was strictly business._

"_And to what do we owe this honor, Blackstar?" Raggedstar asked, more rhetorically than anything else._

"_It's about Darkpaw," Blackstar said._

"_Ah, the little tabby, what about him?" Nightstar asked._

"_I had hoped you'd know what," Blackstar said._

"_What do you want us to tell you about him, Blackstar? You should know him perfectly well. He is an apprentice of ShadowClan," Raggedstar said._

"_There's more to him than that and you know it," Blackstar said pointedly._

"_Ok, so maybe we do. What of it?" Nightstar asked._

"_Tell me! Clue me in! Damnit, I don't know what to do with him!" Blackstar exclaimed._

"_And what makes you think we'd know any better? I do believe you damned us recently," Raggedstar said._

_Blackstar flattened his ears against his head. "I may have…lost my temper, but surely you can understand."_

"_We do understand, Blackstar, I especially, but you still must restrain yourself," Raggedstar said._

"_Sometimes it's difficult. ShadowClan hasn't exactly been at peace lately," Blackstar said._

"_Then you must take extra care to reign yourself in! ShadowClan will never be fully at peace. It never has been since its founding. If you were at peace, you'd just grow suspicious until you ended up starting a war. If I'm not mistaken, you came dangerously close to one just recently," Nightstar put in._

"_True, but it was stopped by the very cat I came here to talk to you about," Blackstar said, trying to sway the topic back to its origin._

"_What do you want us to tell you, Blackstar? A prophecy? Do you want us to tell you Darkstripepaw has some divine purpose that will make all this suffering you're going through worth it in the end?" Raggedstar asked._

"_Well, yes," Blackstar said with a nod._

"_You damned kit!" Nightstar spat, startling Blackstar, "Suffering you're going through? How do you suppose Darkstripepaw's been feeling all his life? You think you have it rough? Do you even know a half of what he's gone through? Tell us, Blackstar, exactly how much do you think you know about that apprentice?"_

"_Look, if you're talking about what happened with Snaketail in the nursery, I assure you, I had no idea-"_

"_Yes you did! Every moment of it you had an idea, but you never bothered to check. And for your information, no, I'm not just talking about the nursery. I mean Darkstripepaw's life as a whole. I mean-"_

"_Stop, Nightstar," came a she-cat's voice, cutting into Nightstar's rant. The three leaders looked over to see a medicine cat approaching._

"_Sagewhisker?" Blackstar asked._

"_Of course, idiot, who the Hell else would I be?" the she-cat snapped._

"_I just haven't seen you for a while. I didn't know you were interested in this," Blackstar said. He yowled when Sagewhisker cuffed his ears._

"_That was a stupid thing to think. StarClan are interested in all the workings of the forest," Sagewhisker said._

"_And so Darkpaw is included in this interest?" Blackstar asked._

"_Very much so," Sagewhisker confirmed calmly, "You want to know about the tabby? Come here, I'll show you something." With that, the medicine cat led all three toms over to a small pool of water. "Look in there. What do you see?"_

_Blackstar looked in. A young brown tabby tom came into view. "Brambleclaw," Blackstar said immediately._

"_Yes, Brambleclaw. How would you describe him?" Sagewhisker asked._

_Blackstar gave Sagewhisker a confused look. "What? I don't know. He's Firestar's warrior, not mine. What does this have to do with anything?" He cried out when Sagewhisker cuffed him again._

"_You do as I say!" she snapped._

"_Ok, ok," Blackstar submitted and glared at Raggedstar and Nightstar when they snickered. "I guess, courageous and loyal and all that ThunderClan crap."_

"_Exactly. Now, look again. Who do you see?"_

_The surface of the water rippled and this time the tabby bore a scar across his nose as well as a few others._

"_Tigerstar," Blackstar said, still not understanding the point._

"_Would you say Tigerstar and Brambleclaw are anything alike?" Sagewhisker asked._

"_Not really. Perhaps they both have their ambitions, but Brambleclaw has that die-hard honest streak in him," Blackstar said._

"_Born of a traitor, given a life of suspicion and hardship, but easily proves himself. He encompasses all traits affiliated with ThunderClan, as you said. Would you agree, then, that Brambleclaw could be considered the very incarnate of ThunderClan itself?" Sagewhisker said._

"_Sure, you could say that," Blackstar said, "but I still don't see where you're going with this."_

_The water rippled again. This time it showed a silver tabby with a matching scar across his nose._

_Blackstar hesitated with this one. "Dark…paw?" He said it as a question._

"_No, Darkstripe, actually," Raggedstar corrected._

_Blackstar immediately became defensive. "Brambleclaw has no scar! The identification is trickier. They look more similar," he said quickly._

"_Relax, would you?" Sagewhisker snapped, "You want to see Darkstripepaw so bad, look again."_

"_Why do you keep calling him 'Darkstripepaw'?" Blackstar asked._

_The three StarClan cats looked at each other._

"_It is his StarClan-given name. Just as yours is now Blackstar," Sagewhisker said._

"_StarClan-given name? How hateful!" Blackstar snapped._

"_Not hateful on our part, Blackstar. Hateful on yours," Raggedstar said._

"_What?" Blackstar asked._

"_When that tabby was brought to you as a kit, you accepted him into your clan. You gave him his clan name. You chose to name him 'Darkstripekit'," Nightstar said._

"_And when he became an apprentice, you professed to ShadowClan and StarClan again that his name was 'Darkstripepaw'. As leader, it is your job to name the apprentices and warriors. The names you give them are what they will be known by in StarClan unless StarClan presents them with a new name if they become leaders or medicine cats," Sagewhisker said._

_Blackstar was taken aback. "But…but no one actually calls him Darkstripepaw," Blackstar said, "Why would you?"_

"_He may not be called it by others, but it is still the name you bound him by in StarClan. Should that apprentice die now, it will be the name he is bound by forever," Raggedstar said._

"_No! I change his name! Call him Darkpaw!" Blackstar ordered._

"_You cannot just change his name so easily, Blackstar," Nightstar said, "He has his apprentice name and he will keep it until he becomes a warrior."_

"_That's not fair!" Blackstar protested._

"_No, it's not. You should have thought of that before giving him that name. Now look into the water and see him as he is now," Sagewhisker said._

_The image rippled, but hardly changed. The tabby looked slightly darker and younger and…more unhappy. Things that would be difficult to tell without seeing the images side by side or right after the other. His cut wasn't bandaged and already scarred over._

"_Not quite so big a difference in those two, now is there?" Sagewhisker said._

_Blackstar shook his head. "No…but there is! Darkpaw isn't like Darkstripe. He cares about things and he wouldn't try to destroy anyone. He may act vicious, but he's not his father," he insisted._

"_Describe Darkstripepaw, then," Nightstar said._

"_He's…quiet and secretive. I can't help but wonder if there are things he hides from me that I'll never find out until he tells me, but I doubt he ever will. On the outside, he's violent and hard and cold-hearted, but I know within him there are good things. He's just misunderstood by those who don't know him," Blackstar said._

"_You said earlier that Brambleclaw was the incarnate of ThunderClan," Raggedstar said, "Would it also be possible that Darkstripepaw himself represents ShadowClan?"_

_Blackstar froze and his mind whirred. It was easy enough to see Brambleclaw as ThunderClan. Well liked by all, especially his own clan. It would make sense for the brown tabby to embrace such a destiny. But Darkpaw. As far as being hated by other clans, that much made sense, but… "But ShadowClan itself hates him so. How could they be so cruel to the one that represents who they are?"_

"_We can tell you no more," Raggedstar said._

"_Your course of action as a leader cannot be swayed by outside influence, not even StarClan," Nightstar added._

_The three StarClan cats began to turn away. "Wait!" Blackstar called to them, "How am I supposed to know what to do? I'm not some bearer of great wisdom! I'm just a rouge fighter that became leader because I was brutal and murderous. What decision am I supposed to make?"_

"_To teach your clan how to embrace itself, you must do it first," Sagewhisker said._

_The three began to fade again. "What the Hell does that mean?" Blackstar shouted. "Darkpaw is some sort of lesson to ShadowClan?" The three didn't answer and Blackstar became angry. "StarClan allowed a defenseless kit to suffer this way just for a stupid lesson?" he cried, but the others were gone and his surroundings quickly faded to darkness._

/

Once he was certain Blackstar was asleep, Darkpaw became uneasy. He didn't like the idea of being basically alone in this strange place, but he had to keep his wits about him. Should anything bad happen, Darkpaw was certain he'd be Blackstar's only defense, and he needed Blackstar to lead him back to ShadowClan territory.

Then, Darkpaw's uneasiness suddenly spiked up. He felt exhausted. The complete absence of food in his stomach throughout the journey was coming back to haunt him. His head throbbed and he felt dizzy. He tried to walk it off, but his paws stumbled over the rock and eventually slipped out from under him. He tripped and his head struck the Moonstone.

/

_Darkpaw didn't know where he was. He'd never been in such a place before. To his right, the night sky glittering with millions of stars looked magical and strange. To his left, a dark, haunted looking forest appeared ready to shoot forth its tendrils and rake him in. Directly in front of and behind him was a narrow path that seemed to go on forever._

"_Hello, Darkstripepaw," a voice said while Darkpaw was examining what was over his shoulder. _

_Surprised, Darkpaw whipped his head back around and unsheathed his claws. Before him, seeming to have appeared out of nowhere, was a mostly white tom with black patches in his fur and a dark brown underbelly. "Who are you?" Darkpaw snarled, "And how do you know my name?"_

"_Why wouldn't I know your name, Darkstripepaw? You're my son, after all," said the tom._

"_I'm not your son!" Darkpaw said, "If I were, I wouldn't be the way I am. I don't know you."_

"_You're right, we've never met. And you weren't born from my mate. But you are my son. My name is Oakbelly," the tom said._

_Darkpaw thought for a moment. That name…it was familiar, yet he couldn't place it. Then, the recognition came and he sprang back. "You're Snaketail's mate," he hissed, extending his claws more fully and his fur bristled._

"_I am. Calm yourself, Darkstripepaw," Oakbelly said gently._

"_Don't call me that! And don't tell me what to do. I'm no son of Snaketail's and I'm no son of yours!" Darkpaw shouted._

"_I can imagine you do not like your name. I don't blame you. It must have been a spark of cruelty that allowed you to keep such a name. Unfortunately, it is yours, and I can call you by no other name until your leader changes it. I also don't blame you for not trusting me. Your experience with Snaketail was another unfair part in your life. I am sorry for what she did to you. Had I been there, I wouldn't have let her-"_

"_Save your apologies, they're no good to me. If you could have a mate like Snaketail, you can't possibly be kind," Darkpaw snapped._

_Oakbelly sighed. "I will not pretend that Snaketail cannot be harsh and even cruel, and I don't expect you to believe me when I say there is good in her, but please do believe me when I say that I see you and care for you as a son," he said._

"_Why should I believe you? You never did anything for me. Can't StarClan walk in the dreams of the clan cats? Why, if you care so much about me, didn't you visit Snaketail and tell her to stop or appear to Blackstar or Littlecloud and tell them what was happening?" Darkpaw asked in an accusing tone._

_Oakbelly looked truly grieved. "I could not. I would have if I could, believe me, but StarClan cannot directly interfere in certain important things."_

"_So helping me would have caused some big, important plan to not be carried through? That's great, it's nice to know I matter so much," Darkpaw snapped sarcastically._

"_But you do matter, son," Oakbelly insisted._

"_Don't call me that either. I told you I'm not your son. If you have to call me something, just call me Darkstripepaw. It's who I truly am, not some lie," Darkpaw said, turning his back on Oakbelly._

_Oakbelly was quiet for a few moments. "Darkstripepaw, do you know where you are?" he asked._

_Darkpaw looked around. "I don't know. StarClan?…Am I dead?" he asked._

"_No, you aren't dead. This is just a dream. Also, no, you aren't in StarClan. Not exactly, anyway," Oakbelly said. "To one side, there is StarClan, but to the other lies the dark forest."_

"_Ok, so?" Darkpaw asked._

"_I'm showing you the choice you have. Right now, StarClan has yet to judge whether you will be entering the dark forest or not. In the end, it is up to you. I cannot tell you what to do, but, s-…Darkstripepaw, you must know that the choices you make now effect where you go. Please, do not let the darkness take you," Oakbelly pleaded._

_Darkpaw looked to his left and right then back at the ground. He grinned and looked over his shoulder at Oakbelly. "I _am_ the darkness," he said._

_Oakbelly opened his mouth and it looked like he was going to respond, but the vision suddenly vanished and Darkpaw was left in the darkness he'd claimed._

/

"Darkpaw. Darkpaw, wake up."

Darkpaw opened his eyes to discover Blackstar standing over him and prodding him.

"We have to go," Blackstar said, then began leaving the cave and entering the tunnels once more.

Darkpaw followed his leader calmly back out of the tunnels. Blackstar hadn't become any more talkative, but he'd replaced his nervous, almost manic, purpose-driven state of mind for and attitude that seemed angry. Darkpaw didn't try to strike up a conversation. It wasn't just that he didn't want to deal with Blackstar in a bad mood, but he also didn't feel at all like talking. He also felt in a sour mood after his encounter. He wasn't sure if this was how one was supposed to feel after having such an encounter, but he found it unlikely that it was. Not bothering to ask Blackstar about his dream or whatever the leader had experience, the apprentice remained silent as he followed Blackstar out into the blinding sunlight. As he was forced to close his eyes at the sudden light, Darkpaw turned back to the tunnel they had just exited. When he opened his eyes, he saw the deep cavern yawning behind him. A sudden anger flared up inside of him, though he wasn't sure why. He looked up at the sky, light blue in the early morning light despite the horrible cold. There were no stars.

Darkpaw scowled and lowered his head, following Blackstar back to ShadowClan territory. "There is no StarClan."

/

Blackstar wasn't kidding when he'd said they wouldn't be stopping. They bypassed Barley and Ravenpaw's barn without so much as a glance and shot through the path through WindClan territory. Darkpaw didn't know how Blackstar could be going at such a rate. Neither of them had eaten or drank anything for two days, though Blackstar didn't know that Darkpaw had accompanied him in his fast. Darkpaw's throat was dry and his stomach cramped terribly as he ran. He didn't know how he had the energy to run like this, particularly in the cold. The clouds gathered overhead, pregnant with new snow which they were quick to release. Running through the snow, Darkpaw was even more amazed that Blackstar went just as strong as before.

"Blackstar…Blackstar!" Darkpaw called, "I have to stop. I'm starving!"

"You'll get over it. What do you plan to eat here, anyway? We're on WindClan territory. They don't take kindly to outsiders on their territory regardless of this path, particularly ShadowClan. And they'll eat you alive if you try to hunt on this territory and they catch you," Blackstar called back.

Darkpaw was exhausted, but he knew what Blackstar said was true. Forcing himself onward, the tabby finally crossed into the tall grass that was ShadowClan. Even though they were on their own territory, however, Blackstar didn't slow down. Forcing the apprentice to keep up with him, Blackstar and Darkpaw ended up running straight into ShadowClan camp. Completely worn out, as soon as Darkpaw stopped running, he collapsed.

"There you are! Where the Hell have you been?" Littlecloud shrieked.

"I took Darkpaw to the Moonstone," Blackstar said simply, "You know as well as I that he needed to make the journey."

"For StarClan's sake, Blackstar, he's injured! And you didn't even tell me or Russetfuryou were going! The whole clan has been in an uproar not knowing where you were! Darkpaw looks like he's half dead! I didn't even have a chance to prepare the herbs for him to go on," Littlecloud ranted.

"I gave him what he needed," Blackstar said.

"You mean those herbs I found scattered by Darkpaw's nest? Half of those weren't even right! You could have killed him! Did you even give him a chance to eat?" Littlecloud said.

"We stopped at Barley's farm on the way," Blackstar responded.

"And did Darkpaw eat?" Littlecloud asked.

"Well, I don't know. Maybe. I told him to," Blackstar said.

"So for all you know, Darkpaw just made that entire journey running on empty," Littlecloud snapped.

"So did I," Blackstar said defensively, "He's a strong apprentice."

"Strong or not, he's _just _an apprentice. He's barely 8 moons old. He can't make a journey like that. And knowing you, you probably made him run the entire way," Littlecloud said.

Before Blackstar could respond, a patrol returned. "Darkpaw!" cried an overjoyed and incredibly worried Mudriver. Thundertail, who had also been on the patrol, ran with him to the unconscious tabby's side.

"StarClan, what happened to him?" Thundertail asked in shock.

"I took him to the Moonstone. What is that suddenly a crime now?" Blackstar said.

Mudriver looked up at the white tom. "You…You took him to the Moonstone…without me?" he asked, a deeply hurt expression on his face.

"Oh get over it. You'll probably have another apprentice. I didn't figure you'd want to be woken up so early on such short notice," Blackstar said coldly.

"Mudriver, help me get Darkpaw back to the den," Littlecloud said.

Mudriver's expression didn't change, but he hesitantly leaned down and helped Littlecloud lift Darkpaw and carry him back to his nest.

/

"I know I'll probably get another apprentice, but Darkpaw's my first. I've been through so much with him. It's tradition for a mentor to accompany his apprentice to the Moonstone. Our mentors went with us. Their mentors went with them. Darkpaw means a lot to me. I was looking forward to going with him," Mudriver was saying, pacing back and forth beneath the lone tree which was now bare and dying.

"I know, Mudriver, I know. It wasn't right. Something seems strange with Blackstar lately," Thundertail said.

"And it's not just that I didn't go, but Darkpaw wasn't in no shape to go. Not after that concussion of his. I'd prefer to at least be told before Blackstar goes and tries killing my apprentice," Mudriver continued as if not hearing Thundertail's comment.

"Blackstar wouldn't have let Darkpaw get that bad. He's got more sense than that," Thundertail said.

"Does he? Didn't ya just say he's acting funny?" Mudriver countered.

"Yes, but Mudriver-"

"Who knows what's got into the tom's head? First he goes n starts getting us ready for war, now this? He ain't right, Thundertail," Mudriver said.

"No, he's not, but-"

"We can't have him acting like this all the time. I don't think he was actually going into RiverClan territory. I think he knows who really was, but he knew the yellow coward wasn't gonna step up."

"Wait, who are we talking about now?"

"N I betcha he's gonna punish him for it, too. Maybe that's what this is! He's punishing me 'cause he thinks I was a bad mentor for letting Darkpaw do what he did, which he didn't do. And he's also punishing Darkpaw for doing what he did, but he didn't do it, but he don't know it. And what he don't know could be the key to the punishment for the thing that Darkpaw did that he didn't do even though Blackstar don't know he didn't do it and also drove him to this crazy action to punish me for the same undone thing he thinks was done!"

"Whoa! Mudriver! Stop!" Thundertail cried. Not only was Mudriver's logic and continuous change of the 'he' that belonged to the pronoun hurting her head, but if he kept going in a flurry like this for much longer, his grammar would spiral out of control.

"What? I'm jest sayin' it do make sense. Blackstar, him's too confused by what be goin' on to know for real what be really goin' on, ya see? N if that be the case, ya'lls can bet we is goin' fast downhill."

Too late. Mudriver was lost in his own world where no one existed and therefore he was the only one that needed to understand himself. If this train of thought continued long enough, the silver tom would be mumbling gibberish.

"Mudriver? Mudriver!...MUDRIVER!" Thundertail screamed. When that didn't work, she jumped at her brother and tackled him to the ground, smacking him in the face."

"Ow, ow! What're ya doing?" Mudriver protested.

"Look, I understand that this whole situation has you upset, but here's an idea: let's abandon our insanity for a little while and find Darkpaw something to eat. Yes?" Thundertail suggest.

"Ok," Mudriver consented and Thundertail climbed off of him.

/

Darkpaw awoke soon after Mudriver and Thundertail arrived with a tiny mouse for him.

"Ah, you're awake," Littlecloud said happily.

"Oh, my head…OH, my stomach!" Darkpaw cried as his stomach clenched in empty pain.

"Yeah, it's not a very good feeling, now is it?" Littlecloud said.

"You ok, trooper?" Mudriver asked, placing the mouse in front of his apprentice.

"Yeah," Darkpaw mumbled, carefully taking a bite.

"Thundertail, will you get some water for Darkpaw? He's dehydrated," Littlecloud said.

"Sure thing," Thundertail said and dashed out.

"I don't understand. I've gone this long without eating before, it never hurt this much. Why now?" Darkpaw asked.

"Warrior training and a mad dash to and from the Moonstone are two very different things. Plus, such an encounter with StarClan can be very draining, even to those who aren't the ones sharing tongues with the warrior ancestors," Littlecloud said.

"Wish I coulda been there for ya," Mudriver said.

"Yeah," Darkpaw said, looking down at the remains of the mouse. He hadn't eaten much, but there still wasn't much left. It was probably best he didn't gorge himself anyway.

Thundertail returned with some wet moss and Darkpaw discovered his thirst was worse than his hunger. He drank greedily, eventually forcing both Mudriver and Thundertail to make multiple trips for more water.

"Alright, enough," Littlecloud ordered, stopping the warriors from making any further trips.

"Why?" Darkpaw complained.

"It wouldn't be good for you to fill up on water. I'd rather you have a chance to get well before you make yourself sick again," Littlecloud said.

Accepting defeat, Darkpaw changed the subject. "How are Darkflower's kits?" he asked.

"Three healthy new additions to ShadowClan. Two females and a male," Littlecloud said proudly.

"How are Stormkit and Clawkit?" Darkpaw asked, those where the ones he was truly interested in.

"They're fine. Stormkit still doesn't speak. It concerns me," Littlecloud admitted.

"Darkpaw didn't speak almost the whole time he was in the nursery. They haven't been in there long. She'll come around," Mudriver said confidently.

"I hope you're right," Littlecloud said. "Now, would you two mind leaving? I'd like to perform a quick inspection of Darkpaw to make sure there's no further damage to him. If he's ok, you should be able to take him back to training in a few days."

Thundertail and Mudriver consented their good-byes and left so Littlecloud could do his work.

"What are the kits' names?" Darkpaw asked.

"The white female, her name is Snowkit. And her sister, a lovely brown and black color, is Wildkit. And there's a small brown and white tom named Mousekit. I can already tell he's going to be trouble," Littlecloud laughed.

"Why? Does he remind you of me?" Darkpaw joked.

"No, to tell you the truth, none of the new-born kits really remind me of you," Littlecloud said.

"But one of the kits does…remind you of me," Darkpaw said.

"Stormkit, she could almost be your twin sister when it comes to your personalities," Littlecloud admitted.

"Let's hope that changes," Darkpaw whispered.

"Oh, I almost forgot. Clawkit said he wanted to see you. Darkflower said it would be ok. When you get well, would you be willing to go to the nursery?" Littlecloud asked.

Darkpaw stood. "I'll go now," he said. Ignoring Littlecloud's protests, Darkpaw made his way to the nursery.

Stormkit and Clawkit were on their own just outside the den entrance, still in view of Darkflower while the queen fed the newborns. Clawkit was batting at his sister's tail, but Stormkit seemed completely uninterested in him. She was watching the shadows swaying in the grass at the edge of the territory intently. Stormkit looked up suddenly when Darkpaw approached. Her eyes scanned the tabby, then focused on the bandages over his nose.

"Hello, Darkpaw," Clawkit piped up cheerily. He stayed near his sister, but looked up admiringly at the tabby.

"Hi, you two. Littlecloud said you wanted to see me," Darkpaw said, glancing to meet Stormkit's eyes which were a cloudy green-blue, unlike her brother whose eyes were driving toward a bright yellow.

"Yeah, did you get that scar in a fight?" Clawkit asked promptly.

Darkpaw smiled. "Not really. More by preventing a fight."

"Oh," Clawkit said. Though he was looking at Darkpaw intently, he seemed loath to move an inch from his sister's side. "Did it hurt?" he asked.

"Yeah, a lot, actually," Darkpaw said.

"Did you die?" Clawkit asked.

Darkpaw laughed. Clawkit seemed startled by the sound, but Stormkit's eyes flickered slightly with something like a spark of life. "No, I didn't die. Not even close. It's a lot harder than that to kill me."

Stormkit whispered something in Clawkit's ear. Clawkit glanced at his sister, then looked back up at Darkpaw. "It takes a lot to kill us, too," he said, his voice loosing some of its ring.

Darkpaw's voice adopted a serious tone as well. "Yeah, it does. I guess we're survivors, you guys and me." As he spoke, he looked at Stormkit.

Darkflower came out of the nursery and Clawkit finally left Stormkit to rush to receive an affectionate lick from Darkflower. The small tom purred with happiness.

"It's time to sleep, little ones. Your brother and sisters are already knocked out," Darkflower said.

"I can't wait till they get bigger and we can play with them," Clawkit told Darkpaw, "I'm gonna teach them everything."

"I'm sure you will. But first, you all need rest. Come on," Darkflower said. She walked over to Stormkit and gently nuzzled the she-kit. "Come, love, you need rest, too," she whispered.

Stormkit looked up at her. She glanced over at Darkpaw before following her foster mother and brother into the nursery.

"G'night, Darkpaw! Don't die, ok?" Clawkit called over his shoulder.

"I'll keep that in mind," Darkpaw said then walked off.

Inside the nursery, Stormkit curled up not far from Darkflower. Clawkit purred and nuzzled the black she-cat as well as each of the kits before walking over and curling up beside his sister. When Darkflower had fallen asleep, Clawkit lifted his head.

"I don't understand what you're seeing in him," Clawkit whispered to Stormkit. Stormkit lifted her head and looked at the cream tom. She said nothing. "He seems just like everyone else. How can he be like you say he is?" Clawkit asked. Stormkit still said nothing, but Clawkit continued. "That just doesn't seem possible, ok?...Fine, I'll trust your instincts, but you hardly even know him…Alright, alright, I feel it, too, but if it weren't for you, I don't think I'd say anything about it…You can't possibly mean that…I know! I know! Yes, ok, yes. It's just that…why us? Why him?...It can't be true…I know how I feel. I know how you feel. Yes, I sense it. I feel it coming too, I just…" Clawkit trailed off and looked in the direction of the medicine cat's den. "No…"

/

Darkpaw was released from Littlecloud's den a few days later. His concussion was gone, he'd finally allowed his cut to heal, and he was once again hydrated and fed as well as any other cat in the camp. With the bandages removed, there was no missing the dark pink slice across Darkpaw's muzzle. A few cats were giving him withering, lingering looks, but Darkpaw chose to ignore them. There was nothing he could do about it, after all, but the frustration and anger he'd felt after leaving the Moonstone stayed with him. It curled up dormant in his mind until he was again trying to sleep in his own nest.

Never before had it been this bad, the burning desire to visit the ring. Even though he hadn't really been away for all that long, it had been an aggravatingly long amount of time since Darkpaw's claws had last sliced through the hide of an opponent. He had, in a way, been cheated out of his most recent fight in the ring, and now, knowing he wasn't supposed to return, the need to fight was pounding through his veins. Was this what murder did to cats? Did it implant itself in them and never let go? How could he be expected to fight this? He'd been doing it for so long. He'd taken so many lives even at his young age.

Thrashing around in his nest, unable to sleep, Darkpaw was beginning to wish he had allowed the battle with RiverClan to take place. Just so he could satisfy this urge. It wouldn't be murder. He wouldn't have to kill anyone. Just fight. Maim. Quick and simple, nothing more.

He had to. It was too much. Just a quick visit to the ring. A small fight. He wouldn't kill. He didn't have to kill. And what harm was there in it if he didn't kill anyone? No, he mustn't. Ghost had told him not to return. But holding himself in this nest was too hard. The urge was white-hot in his veins. What did Ghost know, anyway? She could not truly understand what he felt. He had gotten along for so long without her. Why did he need her now? Just like that fool Oakbelly. No one had come to his aid before, why were they suddenly rushing to do it now?

"_Why do you doubt me, Darkpaw?" _Ghost's voice whispered within Darkpaw's mind.

Darkpaw was panting as he rolled over and over in his nest, struggling to get comfortable. _"I didn't need you before. You weren't there before," _Darkpaw thought back.

"_I'm here now," _Ghost's voice replied.

"_Now. Everyone's here now. Now that I'm ruined, I suddenly matter." _Darkpaw scowled even though his eyes were closed.

"_You aren't ruined, love, never ruined. You always mattered. You just didn't know it."_

"_So why doesn't anyone else know it?" _Darkpaw stopped fidgeting and curled into a tight ball, clenching his eyes and jaws shut tight.

"_They will. I promise they will."_

"_When?"_

"_Soon. Just wait, love, my beautiful boy, just wait."_

"_I don't want to wait."_

"_I know, I know, but you can and you will."_

Darkpaw felt a warm, soothing presence around him. He wasn't used to such a feeling and at first resisted, afraid. But eventually, he relaxed into it. The burning subsided and his eyes finally stayed closed without his forcing them. The crisis past, Darkpaw fell asleep.

/

Leopardstar kept her promise to "forget" the incident of ShadowClan's scent on RiverClan territory. Nothing was said by either clan's leader about it during the next gathering. However, RiverClan warriors seemed to be giving Darkpaw an even wider berth than usual and he couldn't help but feel that his scar stood out very prominently on his face. Several warriors glanced back at him, and he knew why. Even though it wasn't mentioned by the leaders, gossip quickly informed the forest on what had happened between the two clans.

Mudriver was getting more annoyed than Darkpaw was about all the publicity. "They think they understand. They think they know. It's all fucking propaganda. They can take it n shove it up their damned asses," the grey warrior snarled.

Darkpaw remained quiet. It would do him no good to get angry or annoyed about any of this. He was more interested in what Leopardstar did say than what she didn't.

"One of our warriors, Dawnlegs, has had kits…"

Darkpaw wasn't the only warrior in the clearing watching Tigerstripe when that was said. Dawnlegs wasn't there, but Darkpaw caught Speckledthorn glance at the orange tabby. He wasn't sure how much Speckledthorn knew, if anything, but Tigerstripe wasn't exactly subtle to a trained eye as he swelled a little with pride, then shrunk quickly with concern.

Darkpaw still hadn't told anyone that he knew Tigerstripe's secret and the clan for the most part had accepted the scapegoat Darkpaw provided. It didn't really matter what ShadowClan thought, though. All that really mattered was that RiverClan continued to buy it. He didn't know what, if any, story Dawnlegs had given about the father of her kits, but so long as everyone figured Darkpaw had been the only one sneaking onto RiverClan territory, no one would suspect a ShadowClan warrior as being the guilty party. Whether Dawnlegs had an affair or not, she wouldn't be stupid enough to have one with the most hated cat in the forest. No she-cat in the forest would.

Loosing interest in the announcements after Leopardstar had gone, Darkpaw's gaze passed over the other clan cats. He wondered vaguely which ones he'd have the best chance at beating in a fight. His eyes passed over an orange and white she-cat from ThunderClan sitting close beside a long-haired white tom. From his angle, Darkpaw could see that half of the she-cat's face appeared to have been ripped off. He leaned closer to Mudriver and whispered in his mentor's ear.

"Who's that scarred ThunderClan she-cat? The orange and white one next to the white tom," Darkpaw asked.

Mudriver followed Darkpaw's gaze. "That's Brightheart. She was attacked by dogs a while back. It's amazing she survived. A good warrior, too. Has her own style," Mudriver explained. "Why do you ask?"

Darkpaw's eyes never left the she-cat. They passed over her well-kept, scar-riddled pelt, pressed close to what Darkpaw assumed to be her mate, and wandered inevitably back to the vicious scar overtaking her face. "She's beautiful," Darkpaw whispered.

Brightheart's companion flicked his ear backward, then turned and saw Darkpaw. His long fur bristled and he bore his fangs, stepping across to block Darkpaw's view of her. No doubt, he assumed Darkpaw's thoughts were mocking. Brightheart turned to her mate and followed his gaze to Darkpaw. Darkpaw lowered his eyes submissively and stepped more fully into the shadows. With words Darkpaw couldn't hear and soothing strokes of her tongue over the white tom's fur, Brightheart successfully calmed the white warrior who settled himself beside her, again, wrapping his tail protectively around her.

Darkpaw looked down at the frozen ground. Even those he admired hated him. He couldn't remember ever even seeing those two before. It didn't matter. He would have never tried to approach Brightheart, anyway.

The gathering ended and the clans went their separate ways. Darkpaw wondered vaguely whether Tigerstripe was going to sneak onto RiverClan territory again to see his kits. Darkpaw had never been a father before, of course, but it sounded like the type of thing that would be tempting to a father. Tigerstripe would probably want to know what they looked like, what their names were, if one of them looked like him. Oh, he'd better hope they didn't look like him. All those things, Darkpaw assumed, would drive the tabby to sneak onto RiverClan again. But, was Tigerstripe dumb enough to try such a stunt again so soon after the near-battle? Since his kits were in the nursery, he'd be forced to sneak directly into the very camp. It was a foolish thing to even think about and would make Darkpaw's sacrifice completely in vain. But Tigerstripe didn't care about Darkpaw, and Darkpaw had no idea whether Tigerstripe had the patience to wait six moons, at the least, to see his kits.

"Can you believe Dawnlegs has kits? Little Dawnpaw, all grown up," Thundertail was saying to Mudriver.

"I know. I wonder who the father is," Mudriver replied.

'_I know who the father is,'_ Darkpaw thought.

/

The next day, Darkpaw was placed on a hunting patrol. The idea of hunting in fresh snow was not a problem for him. Mudriver had trained him for it well. No, the issue Darkpaw had with it was that Tigerstripe was also on the patrol. No doubt, Tigerstripe had a similar issue with this patrol. Darkpaw, however, said nothing about it, deciding to just avoid Tigerstripe and get his hunting done. Tigerstripe seemed to have adopted the same course of action. Or perhaps, he was too distracted by other things to bother with Darkpaw.

As the patrol fanned out in search of prey, Darkpaw inadvertently drew closer and closer to the Thunder Path. It wasn't long before he reached the long, black strip, just in time to catch a squirrel that was about to attempt a mad dash across. Just as he was returning to the safety of the bushes on the side of the Thunder Path, Darkpaw saw someone standing at its edge a few yards down. Darkpaw buried the squirrel in the dirt beneath a bush before approaching the figure. He wasn't surprised to discover it was Tigerstripe.

"What are you doing here?" Darkpaw asked.

Tigerstripe started as though shaking himself free from a trance. He quickly put on a scowl. "What's it to you, bastard?" he hissed.

Darkpaw frowned. "It was just a question. No need to rip my ears off," Darkpaw said.

"I'll rip more than that if you don't leave me alone. I hate it when rouges come onto my territory," Tigerstripe snapped.

"Yeah? Well if you're so high and mighty as a warrior, how about you do some actual hunting instead of thinking about your girlfriend and her half-clan kits!" The words were out before he could stop them. Darkpaw hadn't meant to say them, but the aggression that had been building in him since the Moonstone had temporarily controlled his mouth. Before Darkpaw could blink, Tigerstripe had him on his back in the middle of the Thunder Path.

"The fuck did you say, bastard?" Tigerstripe hissed, a heavy paw placed on Darkpaw's throat.

Darkpaw didn't care. He was angry. "Why don't you just run off and be with your bitch? Be with your own bastards and leave me alone," he rasped.

Tigerstripe threatened to cut off all Darkpaw's air. "Those are dangerous words you're saying, you little fuck. You have a death wish? You think I'll let you blackmail me? Let you run off to Blackstar and tell him about this? I'd sooner kill you," Tigerstripe threatened.

"I'm not gonna tell Blackstar. I'm not gonna tell anyone, you paranoid freak," Darkpaw hissed, struggling for air.

"And why should I believe you?" Tigerstripe asked, allowing Darkpaw only enough air to answer.

"I'm not cruel, Tigerstripe. I've got no interest in messing with the lives of your kits or your mate. To tell the truth, I don't even care about messing with you. So what if I know your secret? You aren't the first warrior to have one. Don't think you're special," Darkpaw said.

"When you took the hit, you knew about this?" Tigerstripe asked.

"Yes, I did," Darkpaw said.

"Then why'd you do it? Why didn't you rat me out?" Tigerstripe asked suspiciously. "You think it'll make me owe you something?"

Darkpaw laughed, "As if! You think I just got this scar for you? Not a chance. I did it because I care about my clan. In a way, you could say it was for you. I didn't want you to go to war any more than I wanted anyone else to. I sure as Hell wasn't going to let a she-cat I knew was pregnant go into a war. And I wouldn't intentionally put anyone in a situation where they might be forced to harm or allow someone to harm the one they love, not even you."

"Why? What do you care? What do you know about love?"

"Probably not as much as you, but like I said before: I'm not cruel, Tigerstripe. No matter what you or anyone else thinks of me," Darkpaw said.

Tigerstripe was silent for a long time, deep in thought. He didn't allow Darkpaw up and Darkpaw didn't bother struggling. He figured if he really wanted or needed to, he could fight Tigerstripe off, but he didn't see the real point of fighting right now and he was concerned that if he did, it might get out of hand before he could stop it simply due to his overwhelming urge to maim and kill right now.

Finally, Tigerstripe spoke. "You will tell no one that you know this," he said.

"I already told you I wouldn't," Darkpaw said.

"No, you will tell _no one_. And you _especially _won't tell my kits who their father is. I never want them to know, understand?" Tigerstripe said.

"What are you going to do if I don't agree to these terms? Kill me? I'm just curious," Darkpaw asked.

"If I have to," Tigerstripe replied.

"I know how much trouble a father can be. I won't tell them," Darkpaw said, "You have my word."

"Swear on StarClan," Tigerstripe ordered.

"I, Darkstripepaw, swear on StarClan above: I will not tell your kits who their father is, nor will I tell anyone else that you are their father either directly or indirectly," Darkpaw swore. Of course, it was an empty swear since he didn't believe in StarClan, but he still meant what he said and it pacified Tigerstripe who finally released him.

"Get out of my sight," Tigerstripe said.

Darkpaw stood and shook the ice from his fur. "There is one thing I want you to do for me," Darkpaw said.

"What?" Tigerstripe asked.

Darkpaw looked across to the other side of the Thunder Path. "If you cross that path again and you get caught, take responsibility for your own damn mistake. You can't always count on your enemies to do it for you, and you can't get help from a friend you keep secrets from." Darkpaw raced back into the forest before Tigerstripe could respond…

**Ravenpaw and Brightheart! Yeah! I like those two. And Oakbelly! Ha, I bet you guys thought I'd never use him. Proved you wrong! C'mon, be honest, who actually remembered him being mentioned in the prologue? Anyone? It was two years ago. Can you believe it? I can. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna get at least one comment about why I chose Oakbelly to talk to Darkpaw and not Ratkit. I just know it. I can feel it! Long-ass chapter! Yeah! Didn't know this chapter would be so long. Over 10,000 words! I think it might be the longest so far. So, reviews make Darkpaw happy, as usual. And long-ass reviews make Darkpaw and the author VERY happy!**


	30. Chapter 29

"No, Mudriver, really, I think we need to work on this more! Just a little longer!" Darkpaw begged as Mudriver was leading him back to camp. They'd been training all day due to Darkpaw's insistence that he couldn't get the hang of the lesson, but now it was getting very dark out and Mudriver had a patrol to go on.

"How much longer?" Mudriver asked.

"All night if we have to! I think we have to! Please, you don't want me to make you look bad, do you?" Darkpaw said.

"Darkpaw, what's wrong with you? You've been even more of a workaholic than usual lately," Mudriver said.

"I'm not getting the lessons. I think something's wrong with me. I'm not focusing enough. I need to clear my head. Maybe if we go for a run? Yeah, a nice, long run!" Darkpaw offered.

"No, Darkpaw. I told you, I have a patrol to go on," Mudriver said.

"Then how about Thundertail continues my training today? That'd be a good idea!" Darkpaw said.

"She'll have just come back from a patrol. She needs her rest, too, Darkpaw," Mudriver said.

"But-"

"I said no," Mudriver said firmly, turning and scowling at his apprentice. Darkpaw shrunk back and Mudriver's expression softened slightly. "What's got into you? You train perfectly well all day every day and then as soon as I say it's nearly time to go, you suddenly spring up and act like you ain't got a brain in your head. What is it? What?" Darkpaw looked down at his paws and scratched lightly at a patch of frost with his ears laid back. Mudriver sighed. "I thought you were past keeping things from me." Darkpaw didn't respond. "Come on, you have to take care of the elders," he said and Darkpaw's head suddenly shot up. The warrior caught the look of fear that crossed the apprentice's face in a flash. Realization struck the silver tom. "So that's what it is. You have to go back to Snaketail." Darkpaw said nothing but Mudriver knew he was right. "She hasn't done anything to you, has she? If she has, I swear I'll-"

"No," Darkpaw said quietly, "No, she hasn't done anything. Let's just go." With his head and tail down, Darkpaw walked past Mudriver into the camp.

Mudriver reluctantly left his apprentice and went to join his patrol. Thundertail walked in, looking cold and tired. She pressed against her brother in greeting and for warmth.

"It's freezing out there," she said, "What I wouldn't give for some of your fur."

Mudriver grinned at his sister. "You should go warm up. If you freeze solid, who'll I talk to?"

"You've got Darkpaw," Thundertail said, but caught the slightly crestfallen look on her brother's face when she mentioned it. She was about to ask him what was wrong, but Mudriver had already gone with the patrol.

"You stupid good for nothing brat! Where have you been?" Snaketail roared, smacking Darkpaw across his face, irritating his still slightly tender scar.

Darkpaw closed his eyes and kept his mouth shut until the urge to strike back at her passed. "I was training. Just like I was yesterday. Just like I'll do tomorrow," he said slowly.

"That's no excuse!" Snaketail shouted and wrapped her paws around his neck, dragging him to the ground and pulling herself over him, pinning him beneath her weight.

Darkpaw's chest was being crushed and he couldn't breathe. Snaketail dug the claws of one paw into his head, forcing him to look up at her wide-eyed. On the inside, he was struggling with the desperate urge to throw her off and cut her throat, but even if he lost to this rebellious urge, his body was paralyzed in fear of the she-cat above him. She'd used a similar move to this on him when he was a kit in the nursery. He'd thought he would die. He had been disappointed to later awake from an unconscious asphyxiation-spurred sleep.

"You worthless little shit. You deserve to die," Snaketail hissed.

Darkpaw was trembling. He wasn't sure whether her weight was why he couldn't breathe or if it was his own fear.

"No more than you do," came another voice. Snaketail turned to see Runningnose approaching her, scowling deeply. "Leave him be," he ordered.

"You stay out of this, old fool. This has nothing to do with you," Snaketail snapped.

"As a medicine cat, even a former medicine cat, the welfare of this clan is my business. You trying to kill that apprentice has everything to do with me," Runningnose said.

"Who says I'm trying to kill him? If I do that, there'll be no one to bring me dinner. And besides, you never cared what I did to him before. Why start now? He hasn't grown in worth. If anything, he's worth even less than the dirt he was before. Just look at this scar," she ran her claws over the scab across Darkpaw's nose, making him flinch, "He's a disgrace. Always has been, always will be."

"Let him go, Snaketail!" Runningnose shouted.

A few warriors glanced up and saw the scene, but no one did anything. They all went back to what they were doing.

"You want to save him so bad? Here!" Snaketail managed to stand and rolled Darkpaw onto his stomach. She pinned him with her claws buried in his shoulders and allowed Runningnose to get a good look at the apprentice's desperate face. "You think you can take me on, you feeble old has-been? Here I stand! Here's your prize! Take him! Come on, take him!"

Darkpaw was shaking all over. Not just from the fear Snaketail implanted in him, but from the struggle to do nothing, say nothing, to save himself. He'd never realized just how terrified he was of Snaketail until he told himself he couldn't fight back. He'd not only given up fighting, unless in a battle, but she was still a member of ShadowClan. Above all, she was an elder now. Even if everything else was in his favor, he could do nothing to her. "Runningnose, please help me! She's hurting me!" Darkpaw cried. He hated begging, it hurt worse than anything Snaketail was doing to him.

Runningnose stared down at Darkpaw. He remembered hearing those exact words before. Many moons ago when he was still the medicine cat and Darkpaw was Darkkit. He'd woken up hearing those words cried out. Silence had followed. He thought he'd just dreamt it and gone back to sleep. He'd always doubted that decision.

Snaketail leaned down and growled in Darkpaw's ear. "You see? Even when they know what's going on, no one will save you. No one cares about you, no one ever has, no one ever will." She got off Darkpaw and smacked his head hard. "Stand up, you worthless scrap." Darkpaw did as he was told. Snaketail put her paw on the back of his head and forced his face close to hers. "Go get me some food, bastard, and it had better be warm," she ordered. Just as he had done when he was a kit, Darkpaw nodded and ran off. Snaketail smirked as she watched him go then turned to Runningnose. "You should stop trying to defend him. You all should. I just proved that you don't really care about him. No one does. That thing's better off dead. But since you all refuse to kill him, might as well make him useful," she said.

Runningnose glared at her. "How can you be so evil?" he hissed.

Snaketail met his gaze calmly. "I'm not evil, Runningnose. I treat the bastard the way he deserves to be treated. Did you see anyone else protest? No. See, no one else disagrees with me. And even you didn't save him. You, the former representation of StarClan themselves here in this camp. What do you suppose that says about the little bastard, hm?"

Darkpaw returned before Runningnose could answer. He dropped a vole in front of Snaketail and hurried over to give Runningnose a mouse.

Snaketail prodded the prey. "I said 'warm', not half-frozen," she scolded.

"That was the warmest thing there," Darkpaw said.

Snaketail snorted. "Leave it to a rogue to not be able to do a simple task right."

Darkpaw sighed. He'd gotten everything else in the elders' den taken care of. As he walked past Snaketail on his way to the apprentices' den, his defiant streak leaked out just a little. "I hope you choke on that and die a slow, painful death," he mumbled under his breath.

She might have been old, but Snaketail's hearing was as good as ever. She snagged the tabby in her claws and threw him down, pinning him the same way she had in front of Runningnose, except this time he was facing the camp. "Look. Look at them. See all those warriors out there? Guess what, they can see you, too. Do you think they care about what's happening to you right now?" Snaketail pressed harder on his shoulder blades, making Darkpaw groan. "Do you think they care that you're in pain? They don't. They don't think you're worth the trouble of helping. And they're right there. Your potential saviors are right in front of you, and they could care less."

"Got off me!" Darkpaw cried.

Snaketail rolled him onto his back and dug her claws into his throat. "Who's going to make me? Them? You already know they don't care. You? You hold no power, little shit. I could kill you right now and no one would stop me and no one would care."

"That's not true!" Darkpaw said.

"Isn't it? Then where's your cavalry? Where were they all those moons in the nursery? You barely talked, but I heard what you said when you did. You were always begging someone to help you and no one did. No one ever did before and no one will now." Darkpaw finally broke loose and tried to swipe at her, but she backed off with a cackle. "Fool me once, Darkstripe. You'll never be a warrior. Attacking an elder? You're a disgrace to everything the forest stands for. As I've told you before, the only useful thing you can do for the world is die."

After Snaketail released him, Darkpaw stood and shook himself. He yelped when Snaketail smacked his cheek hard.

"That was for showing insolence toward an elder, bastard. Now get the fuck out of my sight," Snaketail said.

Darkpaw turned to go, but before he did, he glanced at Runningnose who was still laying in his nest. It was probably best for his old joints if he stayed in the soft, warm moss Darkpaw had gathered for him instead of getting up into the cold. Darkpaw raced to the apprentices' den before Mudriver's patrol returned.

Darkpaw thrashed around in his nest. He'd dug out the old squirrel's bone, but had quickly flung it away. It was cold and hard and lifeless. It did nothing for him. He felt completely trapped and alone. Snaketail was on the other side of the camp, but her weight still crushed the tabby. He wanted to hear Ghost's voice in his head. He wanted to tell her what had happened and he wanted her to tell him comforting things. He wanted her to tell him that his power and worth would come soon, but, though his mind was filled with hate-filled voices, the sweet, accepting voice of Ghost was nowhere. Sleep had not come easy ever since Darkpaw had begun servicing Snaketail alongside Runningnose in the elders' den. The she-cat somehow knew exactly what to say to cut the deepest into the tabby without leaving a mark. Darkpaw told no one. Only Runningnose and the few warriors that happened to glance up when Darkpaw struggled were witnesses to Darkpaw's torment. Darkpaw said nothing to Mudriver or Thundertail. It would do no good if he did. What could they do? Darkpaw was the only apprentice. It was his duty to serve the elders. And it had been proven time and time again that no one could stop Snaketail from doing what she wanted aside from causing her bodily harm. Mudriver had done that. In an ironic way, it was Mudriver standing up for Darkpaw that placed the apprentice in his current situation. Darkpaw didn't blame his mentor, though. Mudriver couldn't have realized the chain reaction it would set off. And if Snaketail hadn't targeted him in the first place, none of this would have happened anyway. Thrashing himself into exhaustion, Darkpaw finally fell asleep.

/

"_Darkstripe," a soft voice called._

_Darkpaw flinched. That name was usually accompanied by so much hatred. Habitually, he assumed this was how it was meant every time he heard it. But this time, the tone was different._

"_Darkstripe," said the voice again._

_There was no hatred in the voice. No disgust or anything of the sort. There was something different. Something Darkpaw almost couldn't remember. It was like…a loving tone. Yes, that was it. The voice caressed every letter with warmth and passion and…care, the thing Snaketail had so recently told him he would never be given. Darkpaw suddenly realize, he knew that voice. "Momma," he whispered and spun around. There stood the black she-cat with her caring dark green eyes that had brought Darkpaw into this world. And though she had left him at its mercy and he hadn't seen her in his dreams for a long time, Darkpaw didn't feel at all forgotten by the figure in front of him._

"_Momma!" he shouted, the joy in his voice making it sound strange to him. Seeing her was always some sort of trick, but Darkpaw found himself bounding to her eagerly and burying his nose into the coarse topcoat and soft undercoat of the she-cat. He inhaled that scent he had never forgotten, always locked away in his memory. This was generally the time the illusion was revealed and his heart was broken. He braced himself for the disappointment from getting his hopes up stupidly, again, but nothing happened. Instead, Reaper began to speak._

"_Darkstripe, my son, why have you stopped loving me?" she asked gently in a low voice._

_Darkpaw was horrified and pulled back, looking up into her eyes. "I never stopped loving you, Momma!" he exclaimed._

_Reaper wrapped her tail around her trembling son. "But you would allow my murderers to go free. That's hardly showing love for my memory," she said, disappointment in her voice though her eyes were still soft and caring._

"_No, but, I mean, Momma, isn't murder wrong? Wouldn't my murder of them make me just as bad as they are?" Darkpaw protested._

"_Only if they were innocent, but they aren't. These cats are deserving of it, Darkstripe," Reaper explained._

"_But then, wouldn't I be deserving of it?"_

"_Darkstripe, all the cats you've killed are murderers, just like these ones. It's no different except that these ones have wronged you more directly."_

"_Yes, but-" Darkpaw stopped when he heard Reaper sigh and she unwrapped her tail from around him._

"_My sweet boy, how could I have allowed you to become so ruined? I thought you would become something for you father. For me. I suppose it is partly my fault for not teaching you more. If only there were a way to turn back time, realize my mistakes," Reaper whispered sadly and stood, turning to go._

"_No!" Darkpaw shouted and raced in front of her. He raised himself onto his hind paws and placed his front paws on her shoulders, stopping her retreat. "I'll kill them, Momma, I swear. I'll kill them all! Cut them open and rip their guts from their bodies, all for you. Anything, Momma. I'll make them pay for what they did to you," Darkpaw promised urgently._

_Reaper smiled. "My beautiful boy. I knew you wouldn't let me down. You keep your father and me alive within you. Lay down with me, my love, I'll keep you warm and protect you so that you will be strong for you battle," she said soothingly._

_Darkpaw curled up next to Reaper and she curled her body protectively around him, allowing him to rest his head against her soft belly fur. She licked lovingly between his ear which twitched as he began to purr and drift off into a peaceful sleep. He could hear her humming the melody of a lullaby he hadn't heard since his ears were only freshly opened and he'd yet to be taken to ShadowClan. The wind picked up and the shadows danced across the ground as Reaper sang._

"_Hush, child, the darkness will rise from the deep and carry you down into sleep. Child, the darkness will rise from the deep and carry you down into sleep._

"_Guileless son, I'll shape your beliefs and you'll always know that your father's a thief. And you won't understand the cause of your grief, but you'll always follow the voices beneath."_

_In his fading consciousness, Darkpaw could hear the voices his mother sang of. For the first time, they were clear as they chanted under his mother's voice. One voice rang out more clearly than the others. It sounded remarkably like Darkpaw, but icier and older._

_It chanted, "Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty, only to me."_

_Reaper's voice continued with the second verse of the lullaby. "Guileless son, each day you grow older. Each moment I'm watching my vengeance unfold. For the child of my body, the flesh of my soul, will die in returning the birthright he stole."_

_The voice chanted again with a primal beat that seemed paced alongside Darkpaw's own heartbeat. "Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty. Loyalty, only to me."_

"_Hush, child, the darkness will rise from the deep and carry you down into sleep. Child, the darkness will rise from the deep and carry you down into sleep." Reaper finished by humming the final bars of the song, allowing Darkpaw to slip into dreams of how he would go about avenging her mother's murder._

/

Darkpaw had to wait several days before he could fulfill his promise. Somehow, each night was busy either with a patrol or training. Every hour that went by without him finally sinking his claws and fangs into his three renewed targets was maddening agony. All of Snaketail's abuses combined could not add up to the torment Darkpaw felt.

"Did you finally loose your will to fight back?" Snaketail asked as she pinned his head down and twisted his body, threatening to snap his neck.

'_No, I just don't have time to deal with anyone as worthless as you right now,' _Darkpaw would think but say nothing.

"Are you ready to die now?" Snaketail asked, acting as though she might rake her claws through his stomach.

'_No, not yet. Some others need to die first. Then you can kill me if you like,' _Darkpaw thought.

"Darkpaw, is something on your mind?" Mudriver asked.

'_Oh yes, many things,' _Darkpaw thought while shaking his head 'no'.

Darkpaw waited and waited for longer than he would have liked to, but now, now was his chance. This was the night. No patrols, no training, nothing to distract him from his purpose. Feeling happier than he'd felt in a long time and forgetting about Ghost completely, Darkpaw snuck out of the camp.

He didn't pause to talk with T.J. or J.T. when he arrived. He simply made his way directly into the ring while Lynn was asking if anyone wished to propose a challenge.

"Darkpaw, and here we thought you were dead. I can see now it's merely a flesh wound that kept you from us," Lynn said, regarding the tabby with a paradox of boredom and interest.

"It's a bit more complicated than that, Lynn, but I'm here now and ready to make up for my absence," Darkpaw said.

"Oh good, we've missed you," Lynn replied.

"You'll have to pull off something big. We don't like it much when a cat disappears for so long then returns with no announcement," Shadow said, stepping in beside his mate.

"I do have something big planned. Can I do whatever I want?" Darkpaw asked.

"State your challenge and we'll see if it's fitting," Lynn told him.

"I would like to challenge Frost, Slash, and Honeydew all at once," Darkpaw announced.

Lynn smiled. "I think that's very fitting and very interesting. Don't you, Shadow?" Lynn looked over at the black tom and he nodded. "Very well then, are the three challenged cats here tonight?"

Darkpaw knew they were. He could see them all sitting near Cara. He saw the three look at her before entering the ring after she nodded to them. Darkpaw smirked when he noticed that all three of them carried scars on their right shoulders. Cara had marked her new territory. Darkpaw wasn't sure how big her new band was, but she didn't seem at all worried about the potential of loosing these three. Frost was looking at Darkpaw with pure hatred in his eyes. Darkpaw knew this cat wanted to kill him. _'Kill me if you must, but I'm taking you all with me,' _Darkpaw thought. Since his dream, he feared death even less than he had before.

Darkpaw immediately knew he had an advantage when he saw the cramped quarters in the cage across from him. Frost, Honeydew, and Slash were all practically on top of each other, swiping and hissing at one another. Darkpaw was strangely calm. Calmer than he'd ever been in this cage before.

The doors opened and the three bolted out. For a few moments, their attention was focused on each other, courtesy of the cage. In their confusion, Darkpaw darted out and tackled Honeydew, biting into the side of her neck. With his eyes shut tight, Darkpaw saw the other two toms quickly race to the she-cat's aid. Darkpaw sprang off of her just before their claws could rip into his pelt. The toms barely avoided having their attacks land on Honeydew. The injury to the she-cat was not fatal, Darkpaw knew, but her blood was flowing. Frost glanced at the other two and nodded. Slash and Honeydew flanked off to surround Darkpaw. Darkpaw laughed. When the rogues rushed in, Darkpaw ran straight for Frost. At the last moment, Darkpaw jumped over Frost, clawing the silver tom's face with his hind claws. Frost and Slash collided, knocking their heads together, and Honeydew crashed into them. Honeydew disentangled herself first and shot straight for Darkpaw. Darkpaw met her charge and rose onto his hind legs, biting into her muzzle; preventing her from getting a good enough grip on his belly to cause damage. Frost and Slash were there immediately and clawed at Darkpaw's shoulders to get him off. Darkpaw spun around before their blows could land deeply and clawed the first cat he could, splitting Slash's lip. Darkpaw raced away to regain space and opened his eyes. He looked at his shoulders and shook his head.

"That's not very much blood considering the state you three are in. You aren't actually going to let the likes of me beat you, are you?" he mocked.

"Not a chance, Darky. We like you so much we want to be your friends until you die. Too bad it's gotta be so soon," Honeydew responded.

"Only the good die young," Darkpaw said, "I've got nothing to worry about."

Having had enough of the talk, Frost launched himself at the tabby. Darkpaw gathered up some dirty snow and threw it in the tom's face, blinding him before smacking Frost's jaw and driving his face into the frozen ground. There was a crack and Frost's jaw was broken. Darkpaw didn't have time to finish him off because Slash and Honeydew were already coming to the silver tom's aid. Darkpaw tackled Honeydew to the ground and threw her aside. Slash hissed in Darkpaw's face and prepared to bite down on the apprentice's throat. Darkpaw saw the shredded, mangled thing that used to be Slash's tongue before Darkpaw ruined it. The tongue was black and purple and swollen, probably due to an infection that seemed to have spread to Slash's gums. Darkpaw shifted and bit down on Slash's lower jaw, making the black and white tom scream in agony. Honeydew tried to come to her ally's aid, but Darkpaw jerked his head around, pulling Slash with him and forced Honeydew back. Honeydew jumped over to Darkpaw's other side. With the amount of pain Slash was in, he did nothing as Darkpaw released him and clawed at Honeydew's underbelly and wrestled her to the ground. Employing the trick Darkpaw had seen Cara use on Frost, Darkpaw bit down on one of Honeydew's hind paws and raked his claws through the other one. Honeydew shrieked and tried to claw at him, but Darkpaw beat her down.

"Wait here, I've got something I want to take care of," Darkpaw said with a grin.

Darkpaw began to make his way back over to Slash, but Frost rose up, blocking his path. Frost slashed at Darkpaw, nicking the apprentice's cheek and causing a stinging scratch, but it was hardly anything compared to what Darkpaw did. Darkpaw lunged forward, grappling with Frost until he could bite down on Frost's cheek just behind his broken jaw and slam the silver tom to the ground. They wrestled on the ground for a short time before Darkpaw secured a place on top with his front paws resting on one of Frost's ribs. Lifting his weight up and then slamming down with all his force Darkpaw snapped Frost's rib. It just missed his heart but punctured his lung. Frost gagged and struggled, irritating his injury and causing his broken rib to press against his heart.

"If you aren't dead by the time I get back to you, I'll finish you off quick," Darkpaw promised.

Slash was desperately trying to sooth the pain in his jaw by rubbing snow on it. A wretched, smelly, black substance was oozing out of his mouth and onto the ground. Darkpaw wrinkled his nose in disgust. Slash was so distracted that it wasn't hard for Darkpaw to get a good hold of his scruff. Slash struggled, but it was no use, he was being dragged on his back across the ice. Darkpaw discovered he was even more thankful of the ice because it made this task much easier. As he thought about what he was about to do, Darkpaw felt adrenaline flood his system, allowing him to pull Slash across the grass with little effort and throw the tom face-first into one of the fire pits. Slash screamed and howled as his fur caught fire. He said no coherent words as a result of his mouth injury. He ran around the ring ablaze like a shooting star come to the forest. Some cats gasped in shock, others began to laugh. Those on the edges of the ring backed up as the flaming cat passed them and clawed at him if he got too close to stepping out of the ring, but the thick thorns for the most part did their job and kept Slash inside the barrier. Slash collapsed in the snow and began rolling around until the flames went out, leaving only his destroyed, blackened body lying still in the snow. Darkpaw turned to the remaining two opponents. Frost looked dead so he directed his attention to Honeydew who was forcing herself to stand on her wrecked paws.

Darkpaw smiled. "You've certainly got more will power in you than a lot of cats I've seen," he said.

"So have you, Darky. Kind of like your daddy," Honeydew said through clenching and unclenching teeth.

Darkpaw's smile turned into a frown. "I'm not my father," he said.

"No?" Honeydew asked. "You sure? I swear you look just like him."

"That may be, but I'm not him. Here's why: I'm better," Darkpaw stated simply.

"And how is that?" Honeydew asked.

"Well, look at me. Look at my record. Pretty much everyone I've intended to kill, I did. And they were all grown and healthy. From what I've been told, my father wasn't nearly as impressive in his targets or follow-throughs. In my eyes, that makes me better. Wouldn't you say so?"

Honeydew smiled. "I'd say so, but I think your record is going to end here."

"Well then, let's see."

Darkpaw strolled up to Honeydew calmly. Though she remained on her paws, Honeydew did not move. Once he got close enough, Honeydew tried to claw at him, but Darkpaw ducked under her strike and moved behind her. Biting down at the base of her tail, Darkpaw easily threw Honeydew off her hind paws and rolled her onto her back. Honeydew raked her hind claws at Darkpaw's underbelly and batted at his ears, nicking the edges of his ears and cutting into his stomach, but Darkpaw didn't react. He reached around to the bare spot on Honeydew's shoulder. Just as with Cara, it felt like there was only a hair's thickness of flesh protecting the muscle. Ignoring Honeydew's scratches and nips, Darkpaw stripped that thin layer of flesh away. Honeydew didn't feel too much pain since it was scar tissue, but she still hissed and tried to get away, but Darkpaw held her down. Working quickly but meticulously, Darkpaw ripped away Honeydew's flesh, exposing bone, making a trail to her stomach. With looser the flesh there, Darkpaw succeeded in cutting a hole in Honeydew's belly. Honeydew was no longer attacking him, she was screaming in agony and trying desperately to get away, but Darkpaw didn't let her. Reaching a paw in and eventually extending his leg up to his shoulder, Darkpaw reached into Honeydew's body, passing over and through her organs until he felt the two rapidly inflating and deflating bags of her lungs. Extending his claws, Darkpaw ripped holes in the lungs and pulled his leg out. Honeydew's stomach was ruptured and her stomach acids were eating away at her insides while air leaked from her lungs and blood poured out of her body. She died relatively quickly, first going into a coma before her body gave up completely. Darkpaw looked down at his claws. They were still connected to Honeydew's body by strings of flesh. An eerie familiar feeling came over Darkpaw as he shook himself loose, but he couldn't remember the dream it was connected to. Darkpaw turned to Frost. Remarkably, the silver tom was still holding on.

"Give up," Darkpaw told him. "It's over. You've lost."

Frost lashed out with the last of his strength and landed a shallow blow to Darkpaw's chin. Darkpaw glared down at him. He rolled Frost onto his stomach and bit down on his spine, snapping it like he would a mouse to end its life quickly.

'Thank StarClan for its life,' Mudriver's voice said in Darkpaw's head and he smirked.

Darkpaw suddenly hissed in pain as something bit down on one of his hind paws. Looking down Darkpaw was a little startled to discover the blackened body of Slash. Tracing the lines in the snow, Darkpaw saw that Slash, with his body burnt to a crisp and leaking blood and paws shredded by the thorns, had dragged himself all the way across the ring just to show this single act of defiance. Darkpaw felt something almost like respect for the pitiful creature hanging onto his leg. Darkpaw easily broke out of Slash's grip, pulling out a few teeth along with him, and leaned down. Ripping away layers of burnt flesh from a cat who could no longer scream, Darkpaw exposed Slash's spine. He wrapped his teeth around the thick cord and closed his eyes, wondering how being burnt effected a cat's life signature. He wouldn't get an answer because he quickly discovered that Slash was already dead. Darkpaw released the spine still in tact and backed away.

The crowd was silent. Darkpaw looked over at Lynn. "So, did I make up for my absence?" he asked.

A smile that Darkpaw had never seen before on any cat, whether in person or in his mind, spread over the she-cat's face and made the tabby slightly uneasy. "You certainly did, little one. You certainly did," she said. T.J., J.T., and Shadow stepped into the ring to drag away the ruined carcasses of Darkpaw's opponents as Lynn walked to the center. "Would anyone here like to challenge young Darkpaw?" she asked. No cat said a word, no cat moved and Lynn laughed a high-pitched, ringing laugh.

Darkpaw looked over at Cara. She seemed to be the only cat in the clearing that looked completely unmoved by the spectacle Darkpaw put on. Where her calm once seemed admirable, Darkpaw now felt the fur along his spine tingle at the strangeness of it. _'I'm no psychopath,' _he thought, _'She is.' _Though he did not show it, Darkpaw did feel something after the murders. Something deep down within him stirred like it was in pain. He wasn't sure what it was, but he was sure that Cara did not have it. He was glad the she-cat had no intentions of killing him.

Darkpaw didn't stay at the ring for too long. He needed to make sure he got enough sleep and tended the scarce wounds he'd received. Luckily, they stopped bleeding quickly and his thick leaf-bare coat kept them hidden. Darkpaw was content but tired when he arrived at his den. Laying down, he noticed the bone laying nearly forgotten not far from his nest. He reached over and grabbed it, holding it up and smiling. He put it in his mouth and shut his eyes, falling asleep quickly.

/

_Darkpaw was bursting with triumphant pride as he stood over the rotting corpses of his former enemies. He'd achieved what he meant to and it felt wonderful. Reaper would surely be pleased with him. No matter what they had done when they killed her, Darkpaw's accomplishments were superior by far._

"_Darkstripe," called a voice and Darkpaw whipped his head around. Reaper was approaching him, smiling proudly._

"_Momma!" Darkpaw cried and ran to her._

_She met him in an embrace and purred deeply. "My beautiful, wonderful boy, you did everything I could have dreamed and more," she said._

"_And all for you. I did it all for you, Momma. Everything. I told you I'd kill them. I told you I'd make them pay and I did," he said._

"_Yes, you far exceeded all my wildest imaginings. You may be a combination of your father any myself, but you are uniquely something new entirely. More ruthless and clever than Scourge himself," Reaper praised._

_Darkpaw swelled with joy. "No one can stop me. No one ever will. Not when I have you. I'll never do anything without you," Darkpaw whispered, burying his nose in her fur. He was confused when Reaper began to back away._

"_You have to, my boy," Reaper said._

_Darkpaw tilted his head to the side and frowned. "What do you mean?" he asked. "Did I do something wrong, Momma?"_

"_No, Darkstripe, you did everything right, and that's why I must leave you now," Reaper said._

"_No!" Darkpaw shouted and ran to her, pressing himself against her. "You can't leave me! Not again!"_

"_You fulfilled your purpose to me. We have no more need of each other. You are grown and now know your full potential. Take this knowledge and become something great, Darkstripe, like I always knew you could. That's all I ever wanted for you," Reaper said._

"_No! No, I want you to stay! I can't do it without you! I need you here with me. Please, please don't go," Darkpaw begged._

_Reaper roughly shoved him away. "Stop this now! You're acting like a kit. Darkstripe, you're a murderer. You don't need me. You don't need anyone. Isn't that what you wanted?"_

_Darkpaw suddenly felt sticky and wet. He looked down and discovered he was covered with blood. The bodies of every cat he'd ever killed were under his paws, their faces turned up to stare at him, sightless and twisted. Cain with his ruined eyes all the way to the burnt husk that had been Slash. The rotting stench of death choked Darkpaw and he backed away, slipping off the pile and smearing some of the decay on his fur. He yelped and rushed to Reaper, hiding behind her._

"_No, it's not what I always wanted. I only did it because I wanted you. They're for you, not for me," Darkpaw said._

_Reaper looked down at him, disappointment in her green eyes. She leaned down and tenderly licked between Darkpaw's ears, apparently not caring about the filth that covered him. "You…care about them. Even though you killed them, you care. You can care. You can love," she said slowly._

"_Of course I can love. I love you," Darkpaw told her._

"_No, not just love for me. Love…compassion…for others. You have feelings…Disgusting feelings!" Reaper shoved Darkpaw away, again. The tabby lost his balance and fell onto his back, staring up at his mother fearfully for the first time as Reaper glared down at him in disgust. Her expression softened and seemed filled with sorrow. "My boy, my beautiful boy, how could I let this happen? How could I let them do this to you?"_

"_Do what to me? What did I do? What have I done? Momma?" Darkpaw got to his paws. Reaper was backing away from him again, looking at the ground and shaking her head._

"_I wanted to leave you so that you could reach your full potential with no hindrance, but now I see that leaving you is the only way that I might be able to save you from this…this pain," Reaper said, looking up at him._

"_Momma, no! I'll be in more pain if you leave me! I need you! I love you! Don't you love me? Can't you love me?" Darkpaw pleaded._

"_Of course I love you, my sweet. Of course I do. That's why I did this, all of this, for you. I wanted you to be strong like your father, like me, but I fucked up. I've lost you. This is the only way I can help you now. This will hurt you, but only for a little while. Maybe just this quick pain is all it will take to place you back on your true path," Reaper said._

"_What true path? Momma, I don't understand!" Darkpaw dashed forward, but Reaper vanished. "MOMMA!" he screamed._

"_I'm sorry, Darkstripe," he heard her voice whisper._

"_MOMMA, COME BACK!" Darkpaw begged, but he could feel that she was gone. Deep down, he knew that she would never come back. She'd left him, again, and would never come back. "Don't leave me. Please, don't leave me," he sobbed._

"_Darkpaw," another female voice said._

_Darkpaw turned, recognizing the voice immediately. "Ghost!" he cried and ran to her, but the pillar of flame jumped up again and formed a wall from one end of the dreamscape to the other, keeping Darkpaw at a distance. He caught glimpses of the she-cat through the flames. He knew he could never safely get to her, and he now knew the full extent of what fire could do. Still, he desperately wanted the comfort she had given him before._

"_Ghost! Ghost, please help me," Darkpaw begged. He caught a look of pure agony and sorrow on the she-cat's face._

"_I can't," Ghost whispered and for the first time, Darkpaw had trouble hearing her._

"_What do you mean? What's wrong?" he asked._

"_I'm so sorry, Darkpaw. I wanted to save you, I really did. I thought I could…" Ghost said._

_Darkpaw was even more confused. "What are you talking about?"_

"_I wanted to stop you, I did. The others wouldn't let me. They said it was a test. They wanted to see if you'd give in to Reaper seducing you into murdering, again. I told them it wasn't fair, that she was your mother, but…but…" Ghost trailed off and hung her head. Darkpaw noticed a long gash from her left cheek to her right shoulder._

"_Test? They were testing me?" Darkpaw asked._

"_Reaper appearing to you wasn't planned, but when she did, they wouldn't let me interfere. I'm so sorry, Darkpaw," she said again._

"_Ghost, I don't understand. What are you saying?" Darkpaw demanded frantically. His heart began to race and his eyes grew wide._

"_I can't help you, Darkpaw. They'll end up killing both of us if I do. I can't let that happen. I can't let them kill you. I know that spark of good must have been there somewhere. Maybe…maybe you'll find it one day on your own," Ghost said._

"_You…You're leaving me too…" Darkpaw said at last._

_Ghost nodded, fighting back a sob. "I tried. I fought for you, Darkpaw. I wanted to save you, to help you." She regained some composure and looked up at Darkpaw, meeting his eyes sorrowfully. "Goodbye, Darkpaw," she said at last._

"_NO! NO, PLEASE, NO! DON'T DO THIS TO ME! NOT YOU, TOO! I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE ANYMORE! DON'T MAKE ME, GHOST, PLEASE!" Darkpaw screamed. Ignoring the fire, he tried to get to her, but the flames scorched him and flung him back. By the time he got up, Ghost was gone._

_When he succeeded, he was abandoned. When he failed, he was abandoned. What did it take? Why did everyone leave him and hurt him? Darkpaw looked to the sky and screamed. The ground trembled and began falling away around him, revealing an inferno of black and silver flames beneath. Darkpaw clung to the ground, trying to stay above the fire. He slipped and was struggling to hang onto the edge, his hind legs dangling over the pit._

"_HELP!" he called, "MOMMA! GHOST!" He knew it would do no good. They'd left him and weren't coming back. "RATKIT! OAKBELLY!" Darkpaw looked to the sky but the white smoke from the fire blocked out the stars overhead, leaving him isolated. "SOMEONE! PLEASE, HELP ME!"_

"_No one's gonna help me. They all left me," came a voice so very similar to Darkpaw's, but the apprentice hadn't said those words._

_Darkpaw cried out as four sets of claws dug into his back and the weight of another cat pulled him down to the point where only his claws were clinging to the edge of what was left of the ground. He turned his head to the side and saw the replica of himself grinning back. It was bloody, fur spiked up and wild. Its eyes were the same ice blue but had no pupils. And that scar, it was more prominent than ever._

"_Don't ask me who I am. Remember, I'm you and you are me and now," the replica put one of his paws over one of Darkpaw's that was still clinging to the rock, "we are one." He wrenched Darkpaw's paw loose and the other quickly gave out._

_Darkpaw screamed as he fell backward into the flames. The replica was still clinging to his back and laughing loudly as they were engulfed._

/

Darkpaw thrashed and cried out in his nest. His jaws clamped tightly around the bone until it cracked. Then, suddenly, it shattered. In that instant, Darkpaw's eyes flew open...

**Disclaimer(I know, been a while, right?): Darkpaw's lullaby was not written by me nor do I make money by putting it in here. It was actually taken from a song called ****Mordred's Lullaby**** which is sung by Heather Dale. It's a great song which you can find on Youtube quite easily. I recommend it because it's epic!**

**So, some of you were complaining about Darkpaw's peaceful stage. Aren't you glad it didn't last? I am. How evil would I sound if I said I actually enjoyed writing the beginning of this chapter? Darkpaw and Snaketail haven't interacted for a while and what better time to have them do it than when Snaketail is super pissed about being in the elders' den and Darkpaw has gone pacifist? Sounds like a great mix to me! So here you go, he killed someone again and now he's gonna go nuts! And the bone's gone! *sniff sniff* I LOVED THAT THING, MAN! But it shattering was symbolic. Who thinks they know what it symbolized? Reviews, um, well they make Darkpaw's day suck a little less. Trust me, it's gonna take a lot to make him happy in these next few chapters so…yeah.**


	31. Chapter 30

**If I don't post this now, it will never be posted. I've been so busy lately, especially on the weekends and I'm about to get busier on the weekdays. I finished this chapter two months ago, deleted it because I didn't like it, rewrote it, and it's been sitting untouched on my flash drive ever since. I didn't have much of a chance to proofread it so if there're bits that don't make sense or more grammar problems that usual, I'm really sorry. Hopefully you still enjoy the chapter, though.**

Mudriver walked into the apprentices' den at dawn, ready for a normal day of training. But that wasn't going to happen.

"Darkpaw," Mudriver called. He saw no response so he curiously stepped closer to the tabby. "Darkpaw?"

Darkpaw's head snapped up and he turned to Mudriver with bloodshot eyes. Blood was dribbling out of the corner of his mouth. He snarled, revealing his red-stained teeth, and lunged at Mudriver. Mudriver gasped and jumped aside just in time. Darkpaw didn't change his trajectory and rammed into the den wall with a hiss.

"Get out, Mudriver! Get out!" Darkpaw shouted.

"Darkpaw, what-?" Mudriver started, but was cut off by a furious snarl and four sharp claws aimed at his face. Mudriver ducked just in time.

"LEAVE! Leave me! Just like everyone does! Just like they did! I know you want to!" Darkpaw shouted.

"Darkpaw, what in StarClan is wrong with you?" Mudriver asked.

Darkpaw let out a low chuckled. "StarClan? Take your StarClan with you! They don't exist, you stupid fool!"

Mudriver was shocked. "What happened? Did Snaketail say something?"

"Snaketail's insignificant! She always has been and she knows it! That's why she is the way she is. She can't handle it. And I can't either," Darkpaw hissed.

"You can't handle Snaketail being insignificant?" Mudriver asked.

"No, you idiot! Weren't you listening? _They _think _I'm _insignificant just like Snaketail!" Darkpaw said.

"Who's 'they'?"

Darkpaw laughed. "I can't tell you. I'm not stupid, Mudriver. Not like you. I can't tell you who they are because then everything would just get worse, wouldn't it? Not that it isn't fucking suckish already," he snarled.

"Darkpaw, why are you saying these things?" Mudriver was hurt but more so confused and worried. Darkpaw had never behaved this way toward him before.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Am I hurting your feelings? Go get that sister of yours, then. She's got more of a backbone than you have, if only just," Darkpaw snapped.

Mudriver did back up and eventually left the den.

Darkpaw snorted. "I knew you'd leave, too! They all fucking leave!" he shouted after his mentor.

Mudriver wasn't going to get Thundertail. He was going to get Blackstar, but he didn't have to find him. Blackstar, Littlecloud, and much of the clan were already roused by Darkpaw's shouts.

"What the Hell's going on?" Blackstar asked as he approached the apprentices' den.

"I dunno. Darkpaw, he's lost it or somthin'. It don't make sense," Mudriver said, worry evident in his voice. Thundertail, who was walking with the others, went over to her brother in an attempt to sooth him.

Blackstar stormed into the den and came upon Darkpaw pacing back and forth, muttering to himself. "Darkpaw, what's wrong with you?" Blackstar said.

Darkpaw didn't stop his pacing, but he smirked. "Figures you'd come in here, too. I mean, you're the leader, right? You've gotta protect the clan or whatever, right? Well, leader, you're not doing a very good job. You let a monster crawl right into your camp and fraternize with your warriors. You even let him near kits! What's wrong with _you _Blackstar?"

"What is this? Darkpaw, stop that pacing!" Blackstar ordered.

Darkpaw didn't seem to hear him. "But you weren't always like this. You were different. You were like me." Darkpaw's eyes flashed over to Blackstar before focusing back on the ground. "Well, maybe not exactly, but you were close. You were a killer. What was it like for you? What did you feel? Did you feel anything? I don't. Is that normal?"

"I said stop!" Blackstar snapped and tried to pin Darkpaw against the wall. But Darkpaw was somehow too fast and spun away from Blackstar at the last second. He slammed his front paws against Blackstar's shoulder and pressed him against the den wall.

"I don't want to! And you can't make me. You can't make me do anything. You're no match for me, Blackstar. You don't know what you're fighting. You don't know what I can do. How could you? You've never seen me. Not really. No one in the clan has. You can't understand. You're so close, yet so far. But you're a murderer, too. Maybe we could trade stories. Bet mine beat yours," Darkpaw said, then moved away from Blackstar before he threw him off.

"What are you talking about?" Blackstar growled.

"Oops, I forgot, I can't tell you. Oh, it's too bad I can't. You'd love it. I can describe it to you so well. Every single one. It's burned into my memory. I tried to get rid of them, but I can't. The sounds…Oh, and the smells. I didn't know either of those were possible until I made them happen. I don't even know how I did it. It just happened. What sort of sounds did that RiverClan bitch's brother make when you killed him? I know he died slowly. My dear father's incompetence helped with that, didn't it? Not that you were complaining, I'm sure. Did you enjoy watching all that? Did it excite you in all the right ways? Did you like it when they died slow? Or did you do it quick? See, I don't have a basis for comparison. I've never done it quick. I like dragging out. I figured that out the first time. It was an accident, you know. I really didn't mean to. But I guess I didn't get to control that," Darkpaw said.

"Ok, you've really lost it this time," Blackstar said and began to walk to the exit.

"Blackstar! Blackstar wait! It's not my fault!" Darkpaw cried, laughing a little as he did, "They wanted me to do it."

"Littlecloud, get in here," Blackstar called.

Littlecloud was already on his way in when Blackstar summoned him. "Darkpaw, what happened to your mouth?" he asked.

Darkpaw threw his head back and laughed. "Is that really the first thing that comes into your head? What's the matter, Littlecloud? Scared?" Some of the bone fragments were jammed into the roof of his mouth, making his mouth bleed and fill with the metallic tang. It was quite painful, especially when Darkpaw spoke, but his madness overcame the pain and he ignored it.

"No," Littlecloud said, "Let me take a look at that. I don't want it to get infected." He took a step toward Darkpaw, but the apprentice pressed himself into the corner and hissed.

"You stay away from me, too! Both of you! Just leave already! I don't need you! I don't need either of you. I don't need anyone and no one needs me," Darkpaw growled.

"You really think so?" asked a new voice. Darkpaw and the others looked toward the entrance to see Windlegs walking in.

"AHH! Too many! No more! Leave, damnit! LEAVE!" he screamed.

"We're not here to hurt you," Littlecloud said.

"I DON'T CARE! GET OUT! LEAVE ME! LEAVE ME!" Darkpaw shouted. He began clawing at the ground and the walls in a frenzy. "Too many! Get the fuck out!"

It was getting pretty crowded. Not just inside the den, but outside as well. Blackstar decided to leave to return order.

"Littlecloud, can you handle this?" Blackstar asked.

"I think so," Littlecloud said.

"Ok. Windlegs, you come with me," Blackstar said.

Windlegs refused. "No. Take Littlecloud with you. I want to stay here."

"Windlegs, don't argue with me," Blackstar warned.

"I'm not arguing. Just take Littlecloud. What's he going to be able to do anyway?"

"What'll _you_ be able to do?" Littlecloud countered.

"I don't know yet, but give me a chance. If I don't get anywhere, I'll leave," Windlegs promised.

Blackstar sighed. "Fine," he consented, "but if anything happens, you come to me or Littlecloud immediately, understand?"

"Yes," Windlegs said.

"Alright. Littlecloud, let's go," Blackstar said.

Throughout this conversation, Darkpaw had taken to pacing and mumbling to himself again. He didn't even seem to notice the two toms leaving.

"…Everything I do is wrong. Everything I do no matter how hard I try. If I'm good, they leave me. If I'm bad, they leave me. Why did they abandon me? I did what they wanted…" he was muttering under his breath.

"Who are you talking about, Darkpaw?" Windlegs asked gently.

Darkpaw glanced at her. "You still here? I thought you left with the others. Why didn't you? I can't tell you. I don't need even more shit right now."

"I stayed because I care about you," Windlegs said.

"Shut up! You don't care about me. No one does. Just leave. You have no reason to stay here. And don't say you do because I know you don't. Go run off to your brother or something. I'm not the one whose secrets you should be worrying about," Darkpaw mumbled.

"What do you mean?" Windlegs asked.

"I'm not going to tell you that either. It's your own fault you can't figure it out. I promised I wouldn't tell so I won't. I'm a monster of my word, precious."

"You're not a monster."

"Just shut up and leave me alone! I can't worry about you right now. I have to figure this shit out and you're distracting me!" Darkpaw snapped.

When Windlegs refused to leave, Darkpaw simply shut himself back inside his own mind.

"Can't trust them. I can't trust anyone. I thought I could. I was so stupid! No one cares about me. No you don't! She was right. Why? Alone. I'm all alone. I'll always be all alone. It doesn't make sense. I mean, I tried. I tried really hard. No one helped me. Why doesn't anyone help me? Oh, the stink of that blood. All that blood. And the burning. How did he survive like that? It shouldn't be possible. I deserve this. I didn't mean to," he ranted quietly, ignoring any time Windlegs tried to interject except for short outbursts.

Things continued like this for hours. Sometimes Darkpaw wouldn't respond to Windlegs for long stretches of time. Then he'd suddenly answer a question she'd asked half an hour or more ago.

"Where's your brother? I'm sure he can't like you hanging out with me like this," Darkpaw said, panting slightly from ranting for the better part of the day. All his speaking had worked some of the bone splinters out of his mouth but driven a few particularly nasty ones farther in, making for a horrible stinging sensation whenever he moved his tongue.

"That's his problem and he can deal with it himself," Windlegs said, sitting calmly on the other side of the den.

"So are you still holding onto your argument that others care about me?" Darkpaw asked.

"Yes."

"So where's my mentor then? And his sister? If anyone's gonna care about me, shouldn't it be them?"

"I told you. Blackstar sent them away."

"And why didn't he send you away? Isn't he worried about you?"

Windlegs tilted her head slightly. "No. He has no reason to be."

"Oh no?" Suddenly, Darkpaw lunged at Windlegs, catching her off guard and pinning her down. "Should he be worried now?" Darkpaw hissed in her ear.

"No," Windlegs said calmly.

Darkpaw extended his claws. "I could kill you right now, you know, or anything else I wanted to do," he said leisurely.

"No you couldn't," Windlegs responded.

"You don't think so?"

"I know you couldn't. You're not a killer," Windlegs said.

Darkpaw began to laugh harder than ever. "That shows how little you know about me. That's why you and I can't be together, you know. You just can't understand the real me. Until they actually know who I am, I can't be close to anyone."

"Fine. Say you are a killer. You still wouldn't stand a chance," Windlegs said.

"Are you changing the subject on me?"

"You've been changing the subject all day," Windlegs said with a shrug.

"You really shouldn't test me right now, Windlegs. I'm the one that has you pinned. Blackstar's no match for me. You have no hope."

Windlegs whipped her body around in a graceful arc. In a matter of seconds, Darkpaw was on his back beneath her. "Would you like to rephrase that?"

"Oh, so maybe you do have a spark in you after all. Well, aren't you going to take your prize?" Darkpaw bared his neck. "Go on, do it."

Windlegs faltered. "What?"

"Kill me! End it! Come on! You'll be a hero!" Darkpaw shouted.

Windlegs backed off of him shaking her head. "What happened to you, Darkpaw?" she asked.

"If I told you, you'd have nightmares," Darkpaw answered flatly.

Windlegs turned and walked out of the den into the evening air.

"I knew you'd leave, too," Darkpaw said under his breath. He looked up at the dirt ceiling and sighed. "This has to end somehow."

No one entered the den again. The night swept over the camp. Darkpaw worked and eventually pried out the remaining fragments of the bone and buried them in the corner of the den never to be uncovered again. He knew he should feel hungry since he hadn't eaten all day, but he didn't. Besides, he had no right to eat. The den suddenly felt oppressive and claustrophobic. Ensuring everyone was asleep, Darkpaw crept out.

Out in the camp, the air was frigid. Darkpaw quickly hid to ensure he wasn't seen by the camp guards. He didn't know why he was out here. His eyes suddenly traveled to the nursery. Crouched in the nursery entrance were two shadowy figures. One was peering out more fully than the other. Both sets of eyes glowed brightly in the night, one blue-green and the other yellowish. Darkpaw found himself captivated by the blue-green pair more than the other.

"I'd really rather not," he whispered. "B-but I don't know what'll happen…Fine. Fine. I'll go." Careful to remain out of sight still, Darkpaw slipped out of the camp.

Darkpaw ran, but he wasn't sure why he was running. He had plenty of time to reach his destination, but still he ran because he always ran. He crossed over the border silently. Walking to the steep slope that led to the ring, Darkpaw stared down at the crowd. Deciding he'd rather wait a while before going down there, he took a long route around the edge and slipped into the tall trees.

What he didn't notice was that a certain black tom did see him and whispered to those surrounding him about it and they whispered it to others. Soon, a rather large group left the crowd and dispersed into the trees in search of the little tabby.

Darkpaw wandered through the forest, staring down at his paws, contemplating what he intended to do. His head had cleared and his mind was slowly picking up its shattered bits and trying, sometimes unsuccessfully, to repair itself. Coherent thought returned, but Darkpaw was still confused and, above all, hurt. It was the pain that was really holding him back. His ears swiveled around when he heard a snap and he lifted his head, his heart pounding in his chest. He shut his eyes and sniffed. Something like fifteen bodies came into his view. All cats, all adults, and all with violence on their minds. Worst of all, they surrounded Darkpaw completely and were quickly making their ring around him smaller and smaller. Darkpaw opened his eyes just in time to see a small black tom slip into view.

"Hey, there, kitten," the tom said with a smirk. The rest of the cats revealed themselves and matched the black tom's smirk.

"Who are you?" Darkpaw asked, backing away. He might be a skilled fighter, but there was no way he could take on a number this large. Of course, backing away did no good because the cats behind him merely swiped at him.

"You don't remember? Oh, that's right, we didn't get down to formal introductions last time we met. The name's Dag. Your bitch friend killed a buddy of mine. Big guy, almost cracked in that pretty little skull of yours," the tom said.

Darkpaw's eyes grew wide.

"Ah, so you do remember. Your girlfriend wouldn't happen to be around here anywhere, would she?" Dag asked.

Darkpaw shook his head.

"No? Too bad, guess we'll have to settle with just killing you, then. Maybe we'll get lucky and she'll come looking for revenge. Or maybe she'll just off herself. Or maybe she'll just forget all about you," Dag mused.

"Why do you want to kill me?" Darkpaw asked, "I've never done anything to you."

"That's where you're wrong. See, I've got a business to run here. My friends here and I make a profit placing little wagers on the fights. But you, you seem to enjoy killing off our favorites. Losing fighters means losing profit. I don't like losing profit, especially not to a little worthless scrap like you. The way you took out those three last time just proves that you need to be put down, tabby," Dag said.

"Why not just place bets on me?" Darkpaw offered.

"It's a bit more complicated than that and I don't do business with forest cats anymore. Tried it, and then suddenly the bastard gets a new gig and scampers off into the arms of some other tabby. Can't remember his name right now. Not important. What's important is that you stop getting in my way," Dag replied. He flicked his tail and the group began pressing in again, claws unsheathed and fangs gleaming.

"Wait!" Darkpaw shouted. "Think about this logically for a second, ok?"

Dag stopped the advance. "Logically? Kill you, get rid of my problem, seems logical to me."

Darkpaw was thankful his mind had cleared slightly during his walk, but the words tumbling out of his mouth didn't feel like they were his own. "You aren't counting all the factors. You're looking at this like I'm all alone, but think about it. You know I'm a forest cat. I'm from a clan. And you know about my, uh, girlfriend. You kill me and she finds out, she'll want revenge. You saw how she slit your buddy's throat. She'll do it to every one of you, too."

"In case you haven't noticed, she'd be a little outnumbered," Dag pointed out and the group snickered.

"Right, but what about my clan? Have you ever seen a complete forest clan?" Darkpaw asked. His voice was losing its desperate tone and was adopting something smoother and icier, though the apprentice was still worried.

"No," Dag said.

"They're huge. Enormous. You can't even begin to imagine the size. And every single cat, even the kits, knows how to kill. In fact, in my clan, the kits never even suckle. They start hunting the moment their born and their mother just teaches them how. And they always torment and torture their prey first. And that's just food! You don't want to see the things they do to other cats they might have a grudge against! You think my killing is bad? You haven't seen anything. I'm completely merciful to you guys since I've got nothing against you. But if you kill me, my whole clan is going to seek you guys out and make your deaths so torturous, so slow and painful, you'd wish they just killed you. Think about it. Do you want to know what it feels like to have a kit climb inside your stomach and rip away at all of your organs…slowly? They'll do it. It's their favorite game." Darkpaw was horrifying himself with his words. He'd never say anything like that. He couldn't even think it up. They were just tumbling out and he had no idea how.

Whatever was coming up with the words, they seemed to be working. The group of cats began glancing at each other, unsure of what to make of the tabby's description. Even Dag seemed to be contemplating it.

"Alright then. So if we kill you, we call down the wrath of this clan of yours, do we?" Dag said.

Darkpaw nodded. "I'd sure pity you. My mate's one of the most murderous of the clan. She'll make sure you suffer beyond compare. After all, since you're the leader and you're the one who ordered my death, the rest of the clan won't touch you. They'll just imprison you in one of our torture cells and she'll come in and…," Darkpaw gave a theatrical shiver, "I don't even want to think of what she'll do to you."

Dag smirked. "Alright then. We won't kill you," he said.

Darkpaw's face remained the same, but mentally he was in awe. What had just happened?

"Guys, rough him up. We'll send his girlfriend a message. We aren't scared of some forest cats," Dag said.

This time, Darkpaw's face did change. It morphed into a mask of pure horror. The group of cats was suddenly upon him. He fought back desperately, but it was useless. He might have gotten a few hits on his attackers, but they masses on him and rained down so many blows that it didn't matter. Darkpaw didn't cry out, not that the continuous ripping at his coat didn't warrant it, but the same force that had previously set his mouth going was now working in reverse and sealing it shut.

It seemed like hours before he finally heard Dag's voice shout, "Enough!" and the cats pulled back.

Darkpaw didn't get up, didn't dare to. The oppressive weight lifted off of him and cool air shocked his lungs when he was finally able to breathe. He coughed and choked a few times, tasting the tang of blood in his mouth. Dag walked over and put a heavy paw on Darkpaw's chest, making the tabby gasp even harder in a struggle for air.

"Tell that bitch of yours not to mess with us. There're more of us than you might think. And if I see your face in that ring again, fighting one of my favorites, you'll wish you had died tonight," Dag threatened before backing off. He flicked his tail and the band accompanied him back to the ring.

Darkpaw, bleeding and in more pain than he'd ever been in his life, slowly got to his paws. He couldn't return to ShadowClan and get treatment. He had no way of explaining this. He'd need to take care of himself for the time being. And he still had a mission. He hadn't come all the way out here just to get beaten senseless.

Unsure of how far he'd traveled and unable to go farther, Darkpaw finally sought shelter under the roots of an old tree. By its scent, it wasn't currently being used by anything Darkpaw couldn't handle and the apprentice thankfully slithered inside and curled up. He carefully licked his wounds, most of which were deep but not fatal.

It was cold and very lonely in the little hollow. Darkpaw wanted to return to camp. He wanted to curl back up in his nest and fall asleep and wait for Mudriver to wake him up and take him out hunting or on a patrol. He'd even take care of Snaketail. Anything to not be in his current situation. But Darkpaw knew he couldn't go back. Not yet. After his wounds had healed and he'd done what he'd set out to do.

/

_Darkpaw didn't know what he was doing back in his recovered dreamscape. There were no hints whatsoever of the destruction it had undergone the previous night. But what good did being here do him? There was no one left for him to see or talk to or speak with. Ghost and Reaper had abandoned him, after all. It was that last dream that had led him to the madness of that day. What was he doing back here if there was nothing for him to do?_

"_There's everything for you to do," came an icy voice, much like the one Darkpaw had spoken in before. Darkpaw's doppelganger suddenly appeared before him._

"_You again," Darkpaw hissed. "Would you leave me alone?"_

"_Ouch. I'm hurt. And after everything I've done for you," said the other._

"_You've never done anything for me!" Darkpaw snapped._

"_Have so!" claimed the other._

"_What? What did you ever do for me except make my life an even worse Hell than it already is?"_

"_I'll explain to you why you can't blame me for your Hell later. First, what haven't I done for you? I've made you stronger, fiercer, and, most recently, I saved your sorry life."_

_Darkpaw cocked his head in confusion._

"_Oh come on now, you didn't honestly think you were clever enough to come up with that story, did you?" the other asked._

"_Clever isn't the word I'd use. More like twisted," Darkpaw said._

_The other shrugged. "Different strokes. The point is you're alive because of me. Well, we're alive because of me. An unfortunate side effect of our relationship is that if you die, I die, for now."_

"_I don't want a relationship with you. Go away," Darkpaw ordered and turned away._

"_Hey, how do you know that my leaving won't kill you anyway?" the other challenged._

"_Because you aren't real. You're just a figment of my imagination," Darkpaw said._

"_You sure about that?" asked the other. He extended his claws and dug them into his own shoulder._

_Darkpaw hissed in pain as blood began to flow from his own shoulder. He looked back over at the doppelganger in shock._

_The other tabby gave a prideful smile. "I told you before. You and me, we're the same. And besides, I made you."_

"_You did not! _I_ made _you_!" Darkpaw snapped._

"_How do you know? A lot of shit happened to you in the nursery. Maybe I'm the real you and _you're _the figment of _my _imagination," the other said._

"_Stop it!" Darkpaw shouted. "You can't be the real me because I'm me and I always have been. I've been here longer than you have."_

"_You don't know that for sure."_

"_Yes, I do!"_

"_Alright then, let's use logic. If I came here later, then I shouldn't have any memory of before I came, right?" the other offered._

"_Right," Darkpaw agreed hesitantly._

"_Then if I can tell you your earliest crystal memory, then I'll have had to at least been around for that long, right?" he continued._

"_Ok, fine. Go for it," Darkpaw said._

_The other tom grinned. "I think your earliest crystal memory is of the first night we spent in the nursery. We'd just been brought to ShadowClan and were curled up on our own far away from Snaketail. It took a long time to get to sleep because we were cold, but we finally did. Then, we felt a disturbance and woke up. We didn't know what it was, but something suddenly felt wrong. We knew immediately that it had something to do with Reaper. You spoke for the first time since we arrived. You said 'Momma' and as soon as you did you knew she was dead." At Darkpaw's look of shock, the tom gave another proud grin. "That's the earliest crystal-clear memory you have, isn't it? Don't lie, now. I'll know. After all, we are in my head."_

"_It's _my_ head," Darkpaw hissed._

"_And we're back to that argument. Alright then, I'll prove to you that this is, in fact, my mind. My earliest memory is of when my eyes first opened. Reaper was laying right next to me and licking my forehead. She was so proud. She said, 'I hope you keep your father's blue eyes.' Then she got very sad. It was the first time I'd ever seen her and already she was sad. I wanted to know what was wrong. She said, 'We must leave here soon, Darkstripe. I have to take you away and keep you hidden so you will be safe.' I didn't know what she meant at the time. I was scared of the idea of leaving her, but she calmed me down by singing my lullaby. I've got it memorized. Do you?" he challenged._

_Darkpaw was in shock. "But…But I can remember her, too!" he insisted. "If I never saw her, how would I know what she looks like?"_

"_You were produced from my mind. It only makes sense that you'd have some of my memories. But here's the difference: I can remember her clearly and you can't."_

"_I can remember her scent!"_

"_Of course you can. No kit ever forgets their mother's scent. And her scent was on our fur that night. You could have easily picked it up from there," said the other._

"_This isn't true. You're lying! You even told those other cats, the ones with Ghost, that I created you!" Darkpaw hissed._

"_Them? I knew from the beginning that they were no good for us. It's not my fault you were too blind to see it. You think I was really going to tell them the truth and have them start coming after me? Not a chance! No, better to let them think you ran the show than put myself at risk," said the other._

"_No, no, no! You're making it up! All of it! That memory was a lie! I know it was!"_

"_What's your name?"_

"_What?" Darkpaw asked._

"_Your name. What is it?" the other repeated._

"_Darkstripepaw. I'd think you'd know," Darkpaw snapped._

"_Well, do you know what mine is? My name is Darkstripe. The name I had before I was taken to the clan. The name Reaper gave me."_

_Darkpaw's claws flexed. "Blackstar changed our-my name!" he shouted._

"_A name is a name. You don't really believe it can be changed just because someone said so, do you? That's a silly belief brought about by cats that worship their ancestors. I thought you didn't go for that foolishness?"_

"_No, but Blackstar's the leader. He can do whatever he wants," Darkpaw said._

"_Blackstar might be your leader, but I was born free from such oppression. Before you went about trying to ruin my life, I was perfectly happy and willing to be my own leader. The least you could do is become the clan leader like Reaper wanted me to."_

"_Why do you keep calling her 'Reaper'?" Darkpaw asked._

"_Because I'm older than you and can therefore act my age, my true age. Besides, what do I owe to Reaper that earns her the title of my mother? It's partly her fault you even exist," the other said._

_Darkpaw was going to argue the point of his existence again, but something else came to his mind. "That's right, you are older than me. Too old. Listen to your voice, it's much more grown up than mine," Darkpaw pointed out triumphantly._

"_Just because I look and sound older than you doesn't mean I am. You're kittish and I'm mature. It just happens to show," said the other._

"_But you had the scar before I did," Darkpaw said._

"_I embrace who I am. Mentally, one can look however they want. I wanted this scar. The fact that it manifested itself physically so perfectly is pure coincidence. Besides, look at you. My body is covered with injuries right now and you aren't personified as having any except my scar. Why do you suppose you have that scar? Maybe, subconsciously, you're starting to figure out you aren't the real deal, so you're trying to be more like me in order to keep up this masquerade, hm? But I'm getting a little tired of you messing with _my _life. I want it back. Maybe not yet, since you've effectively fucked me up with your stupidity, but someday soon, I'll be taking my place back, understand? And when I do, I'll want you gone." The doppelganger laughed his high-pitched, ringing, insane laugh and Darkpaw fell to the ground, covering his ears._

"_No!" he shouted._

/

Darkpaw sat up with a start, panting. He looked around, confused at his surroundings before he remembered all that had happened. Well, he didn't so much remember as the stabbing pain shooting through his body reminded him. At least he'd stopped bleeding for the most part, but he was incredibly hungry. Forcing himself to his paws, he managed to scent out a squirrel living high in the tree he was taking shelter in.

Climbing the tree was excruciating work. His wounds kept splitting open and it was very difficult to keep from crying out. Eventually, though, Darkpaw finally reached a suitable branch and watched as a small squirrel busily scurried about its little hollow. Waiting until the tiny creature poked its head out of the hollow Darkpaw pounced and snapped the small neck. Dragging himself back down the tree, Darkpaw slipped back into his makeshift den.

While he ate the squirrel, Darkpaw almost felt guilty. He was so used to hunting for the clan before himself. Obviously prey would be scarce for the clan and today they wouldn't have his contribution, small though it was in leaf-bare. And he was the only apprentice. Who would care for the elders? Snaketail he didn't care about, but what about Runningnose? And what if Littlecloud needed something to take care of the kits? Darkpaw shook his head. Stormkit and Clawkit had had their part in his departure. They wouldn't miss him. Mudriver might, though, and Thundertail. He felt so guilty for the things he'd said to and about them the day before. He didn't really feel that way. Why had he said those things? Was it really him? Or was it this new creature lurking around inside his head? Then there was Windlegs. What was her reaction to his disappearance? Did she really care enough about him to mourn his absence or was it really all lies? His guilt and confusion getting the better of him, Darkpaw only ate half the squirrel.

"I can't go back," he mumbled to himself, "They won't let me back." Despite saying this, Darkpaw did want to go back. He wanted to go home and, yes, ShadowClan was his home. Whether others cared about him there or not, he had nowhere else to go. "I'll probably die soon anyway. Once this is over, someone is bound to come looking for me. And knowing my track record, they won't want to be friends once they find me."

Hopeless, sad, alone, and injured, Darkpaw spent the rest of the day in or near the tree. He left only to search for herbs or cobwebs to help with his injuries and could only hope that what he used wasn't poisonous. But if it was, it didn't matter much.

Unable to fall asleep, Darkpaw wandered around this abandoned portion of the forest. He carefully avoided the ring and being seen at all cost by walking in the opposite direction of both the ring and his former home. A thought suddenly struck him as he recognized a trail he'd seen only once before. Following it by memory, Darkpaw passed into the dead area that Ghost had brought him to. It was quiet, as usual, but didn't quite feel the same. It seemed emptier.

"Well, where are you?" he called. Silence greeted him. "Hey, I know you're out there! Speak up, or am I worth so little that you won't even identify my presence? C'mon you cowards! You were so big and scary before, why not now?" Still, there was no reply and Darkpaw became angry and clawed at the ground. He shouted, "Come on, then! I failed, didn't I? Why am I still here, then? What good am I? Strike me down and end it, you bastards! I'm giving myself over here! You happy? Are you happy now? There's nothing left to me! Nothing at all! If you'd just helped me then maybe this wouldn't have happened. But no, that's not how you dicks work, is it? You're so powerful, yet you turn away when you're really needed. You're nothing! You and your tricks are nothing to me!" Darkpaw suddenly realized he was crying and didn't try to stop. He screamed into the trees and the fury-filled echo shrieked back at him.

A faint breeze licked around Darkpaw and he glanced up. The clouds moved over the moon and blocked out the stars, shrouding him in an enormous shadow, enclosing him in darkness.

"Ghost, if you're out there, have me buried where there is no sun," he said before leaving the clearing.

/

Back in the little den under the tree, Darkpaw dug up the squirrel carcass he hadn't finished. Morning light was streaming over the forest by the time he'd returned, but the sun's rays didn't penetrate into his small haven. He ate the rest of the squirrel, but before burying it, he stared at the small skeleton. The ribcage was completely intact and Darkpaw wondered when the last time was that he actually paid attention to the body of his meal. He hadn't since his first hunt. Paying careful attention to the structural integrity of the skeleton, Darkpaw licked the entire thing as clean as he could. Then, Darkpaw stood and placed a paw on the small ribcage. Without really knowing what urged him to do all this, Darkpaw smashed the ribcage and then the rest of the skeleton before burying the fragments.

Darkpaw slept until a few hours before the sun went down. Crawling out of his nest, he set to work ensuring his wounds had sealed and he could move with only minor stiffness. The cats that had attacked him had wanted him to be able to move so he could return to his camp even if in pain. Satisfied that he was in good enough condition, Darkpaw set to work training with everything Mudriver had taught him. Mudriver was a good fighter, Thundertail was a better one, and Blackstar was the best. Each of these cats had had their share in his training. Whatever Darkpaw would need to face, he was confident that he could.

The sun set, Darkpaw had done all he could. He'd honed his skills in hunting and fighting, though he hadn't killed anymore prey. He took a long run, though his muscles and injuries protested it. Finally, Darkpaw closed his eyes and sensed all that was around him just like Blackstar had taught him. Slowly, Darkpaw recited the entire Warrior Code three times.

"I can never go back, but I'll never forget where my home was. I wouldn't change anything about my life, not even Snaketail or Tigerstripe. Even though I am not and cannot be sorry for any murder I committed, I know that it was wrong. Whatever price I must pay for my actions, so be it," he said after each recitation.

Opening his eyes, Darkpaw took a deep breath and began to walk back to the ring. Just as he had before, he strode calmly straight into the center of the ring upon his arrival.

"Darkpaw, back so soon? That was quite the show you put on for us last time. Are you here for round two? Is there anyone else you hate that much?" Lynn said upon seeing him.

"No," Darkpaw said, "I'm not here to fight. I'm here to do something much more important. I have an announcement." The ring was quiet around him and Darkpaw felt his heart thump heavily in his chest. He didn't say a word until he was sure his voice would come out calm and steady. "After tonight, I will not return here. I'm giving this up," he said loud enough for everyone to hear. He was expecting some sort of uproar, but nothing happened, no one said anything.

Then Lynn spoke up, "So, are you saying you wish to formally quit?" The way she said it, it seemed as though she were talking more to the others than to Darkpaw.

"Yeah, I suppose I am," Darkpaw agreed.

"Are you sure this is what you want, Darkpaw?" Lynn was circling him now.

"Yes," Darkpaw said.

"Very well, do you know the price for leaving here?" Lynn asked.

"Uh…no," Darkpaw admitted, suddenly very uneasy.

Shadow stepped into the ring. "You remember when you first came here I told you that if anyone wants to leave, only they must spill their blood," he said.

"I have spilled blood," Darkpaw said.

"No, no, no, Darkpaw, that's not what we mean," Lynn purred, rubbing against the tabby just as she had when first announcing him to the group, "What we mean is simply that your family or loved ones will not be punished for your departure. That doesn't mean that you won't be. The price for leaving us is to run a gauntlet."

Darkpaw was even more uneasy. "I've never seen that done before. I've never even heard of it."

"That's because most cats are too frightened to go through with it. Most of them just run away and never return and hope no one finds them and drags them back here. Very few cats ever choose to quit in the first place. That is, until they're dead," Shadow said.

"And you're so very good at killing. I seems like a shame to me that your talent go to waste. Why don't you stay? We could take good care of you here," Lynn purred, "You'd never have to go back to that clan of yours."

"No," Darkpaw said firmly, "I'm done with this. Do what you must, but I'm not going to be one of you anymore."

Lynn stopped her circling and moved to stand beside Shadow. "Will you be returning to your clan after this, or going out to the rogue territories?" she asked.

Darkpaw sighed before answering. "The rogue territories," he said quietly.

"Very well," Lynn told him then shouted to the others, "Form the aisle!"

Every cat in the clearing lined up on either side of the cage door that pointed out away from the clan territories. The door of the cage was swung open wide and quickly surrounded by the line. Shadow grabbed Darkpaw and began dragging him toward the cage. Darkpaw instinctively struggled, but he had no hopes of escaping the black tom's clutches. Shadow shoved him through the side door of the cage and locked him in so that the only way Darkpaw could get out was by going down the aisle of cats. The thorns had to be moved aside because the line extended directly through the border of the ring and continued on, it seemed to Darkpaw, endlessly.

"You are to walk the entire length of the gauntlet. If you try to run or break out, you will be killed immediately, so don't try it. I will draw a line on the ground at the other end. Once you pass it, all attacks will cease and you will be free to go, never to be bothered here again as long as you do not return," Shadow said through the bars.

"Wait until I've signaled you to start before you begin. If you start too early, you will be forced to go back," Lynn said.

Darkpaw nodded his understanding.

"This really is a pity. You had so much promise in you," Lynn sighed before she and Shadow made the long journey to the other end of the gauntlet.

While he waited, Darkpaw looked into the hungry faces of the cats on either side of the door. In the distance, he could make out the end where one white cat and a black cat were taking their places facing inward just like the rest. All of the faces down the entire length of the line were fixed on him. They wanted his blood and would do anything to get it. Darkpaw's heart was a drumbeat. He must be insane and suicidal to go through with this.

Before Darkpaw was ready, he heard Lynn's voice cry, "BEGIN!" All the cats glanced back at her then fixed their stares back on Darkpaw expectantly. Apparently, they couldn't strike at him until he stepped out of the cage. Against his better judgment and survival instinct, Darkpaw stepped out.

The blows began raining down immediately. Every cat within reach struck at Darkpaw with claws fully extended and punishing. They tore open new wounds and re-opened his old ones. Darkpaw was in agony. His tongue bled as he bit it to prevent from screaming. Suddenly he was on the ground, though he wasn't sure how it happened. The cats he was near cheered in joy as their turn were extended until Darkpaw worked up the will to stand again and continue his walk. He wasn't just being scratched. He was bitten and spat at and teased. One small tom jumped on his back and Darkpaw had to wrestle himself free before be could continue. Darkpaw fell again and couldn't get to his paws as quickly this time due to the heaviness of the blows raining down. He opened his eyes and, through his blurred vision, it appeared as though the end were no nearer than it had been when he started. He dared not look back and pressed on.

"Hey, tabby, I thought you were delivering a message to your girlfriend for us? What happened? Did you decide one beating wasn't enough to get the point across?" came the jeering voice of Dag.

Darkpaw recognized the faces of the gamblers that had attacked him before. They hadn't become any kinder as they took their turn ripping at him again. Crawling on, another familiar form came into view. It was Ginger. Darkpaw had never before seen such hatred in her eyes. Not toward him or any of her opponents.

"I respected you!" she hissed, then slashed at Darkpaw's face.

Darkpaw finally cried out as the scratch tore open the scar on his nose. Several cats congratulated Ginger, but after that blow, she turned away.

Darkpaw was exhausted. He was beginning to think he was indeed suicidal. How was he supposed to survive this alone? He'd surely be dead before he reached the end. What would they do with his body? Darkpaw choked down the urge to spring up and run off. He'd definitely never survive if he tried to break the rules. He had to go on. This had to be finished. He'd die _after _he crossed that damn line.

'_What the fuck do you think you're doing? You're killing us!' _screeched the doppelganger, Darkstripe, inside Darkpaw's head.

Darkpaw smirked. _'You think we'll go to the dark forest? They say that you wander alone in there, but I won't be alone, will I? Or you won't be alone, whichever. At least we'll have each other, sweetheart,' _Darkpaw thought back.

'_You little fucker! You fucking faggot! How dare you? After all we've been through, you're just gonna throw it away? What happened to being the best? Don't you remember that dream?' _screamed Darkstripe.

'_It was just a dream. Dreams aren't real. And the thing with being the best is, someone will always be trying to get better than you and someone will always succeed. You'll never reach the top. You and me, we were stupid for trying. You wanna take credit for bringing me this far? Fine. You'll be responsible for our death.' _

Darkpaw dragged along. The end was in sight. He glanced up and caught Cara's eye. The cats around her began lunging at Darkpaw as soon as they could, but Cara did nothing. Even as her newly-marked followers took their strikes, Cara refused to participate. She simply watched with her cold eyes, staring into that ragged thing that was Darkpaw's soul. Somehow, that was much worse than if she were hitting him.

At last, the line was in sight. There were only six cats remaining in front of Darkpaw. Ruby and Flame were first, slicing their claws through Darkpaw only once each. Then came T.J. and J.T. There was such a look of betrayal on the faces of both toms that Darkpaw hardly registered their blows. T.J. especially looked heart-broken and angry.

"Never come back," T.J. whispered, smacking Darkpaw across his right eye, which was beginning to swell, "You failure. I never want to see your face again, coward."

"Heed his warning," J.T. said, "We _will _kill you if you ever return."

"Don't worry," Darkpaw panted, "I'll never come back here. This will be the site of my grave."

Lynn and Shadow were last. Lynn especially didn't hold back as she belted her turn out at Darkpaw. Darkpaw paid no attention, even as Shadow ripped his ear. The line was right in front of him…Only a few more inches…One painful paw step at a time, Darkpaw crawled closer and closer until finally, his front paw crossed the line. All attacks ceased, just as Shadow had promised.

The ringfighters gathered around to mock Darkpaw's limp body. He was bloody and disfigured…and so very still. Dirt was thrown on him and more cats spat at him, calling him atrocious names. The crowd began to disperse, every once in a while a cat would nudge the body.

"I can't believe he was once thought so fierce," one of Cara's band told his leader.

Cara said nothing, merely stared down at the mangled tabby silently. Everyone else was gone. Whatever was to be done with the body would be done later. After more important things. Cara leaned down and sniffed the tabby fur. Content with what she gathered, Cara, too, left the lifeless body.

'_NO! NO, I WON'T LET YOU DO THIS TO ME!'_

'_This isn't about you. None of this is about you. This is about me.'_

'_Well fat lot of fucking good YOU did with it! Suicidal, fucking coward!'_

'…_I'm NOT suicidal.'_

Darkpaw's chest shallowly rose and fell. Darkpaw's eyes opened ever-so-slowly. Even the dim light was torturous, but he forced his way back to consciousness. Holding back groans of pain, Darkpaw pulled himself to his paws. He looked over his shoulder at the crowd of cats gathered once more around the ring. No one was paying attention to him. He was dead to them. Darkpaw turned back to the direction of what would be his new home. Gathering up what strength he was left with, he ran into the darkness…

**In the event you don't want to read this story anymore, either take this as the end or pretend Darkpaw died. Otherwise, I don't know when I'll update again, but I'll try. Again, I apologize for any and all mistakes, but it's either I proofread less and post a bit more quickly or proofread as much as I can to try to work out all the mistakes and leave you guys for months at a time. I'd rather get these chapters out because, if you hang with me, there's still more to be done in this story.**


	32. Chapter 31

**Cat's met in this chapter:**

**Hope- white and red she-cat with black paws and amber eyes. Kittypet.**

**Thrash- black tom. Rogue.**

**Dozer- black tom. Former kittypet. Rogue.**

"_Deny thy father and refuse thy name…_

_Tis but thy name that is my enemy…"_

_-Romeo and Juliet_

It wasn't long before the pain got to be too much and Darkpaw was forced to stop running. He wasn't going to return to the little hollow under the tree. Shadow claimed that no one would bother him anymore, but the word of a murderer was hardly trustworthy. Murderer. Darkpaw smiled ruefully. That was all he was now. He wasn't a fighter or an apprentice. He didn't even deserve his name anymore.

Limping badly, Darkpaw found a two-leg nest with a large container filled with water behind it. He managed to heave himself up onto the rim of the wooden container and peered in. The moonlight reflected off the drying blood covering his fur. One of his eyes seemed to be swollen shut. He needed a medicine cat, but he wasn't going to get one. Leaning down on sore legs, Darkpaw lowered his head to the surface of the water and began to drink.

"Who are you?" asked a voice behind him and Darkpaw was so startled that he fell into the water.

His instincts kicked in and he was able to keep his head above the water, but his limbs wouldn't cooperate for long. Water splashed into his mouth and tasted horribly metallic as his blood mixed with it. He yowled and hissed as he thrashed desperately, trying to get out. Fangs closed around Darkpaw's scruff and hauled him free. He was set on the cool grass where he began choking and gasping, trying to rid his lungs of water.

"I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to scare you! Are you alright?" came the voice again, now filled with concern.

"I'm fine," Darkpaw wheezed. He looked up and saw a red and white she-cat looking him over.

"You sure? You don't look fine. Did you get in a fight with a stray dog?" the she-cat asked.

"Sure, we can go with that," Darkpaw said.

"Do you need some help? I can get my two-legs out here and they can patch you up-" the she-cat offered.

For the first time, Darkpaw noticed a pink collar around the she-cat's neck. "No!" he said, a bit too quickly, cutting off what the she-cat was about to say next, "No two-legs. I have to go." He began to get up to leave, but the now freezing water on his stinging wounds made the slightest movement unbearable.

"You ain't going nowhere tonight. C'mon, I'll take you to the shed and you can stay in there." She managed to brace Darkpaw against her shoulder and began leading him to a smaller nest beside the larger one. It reminded Darkpaw of the place where he'd first met Lynn and Shadow.

"No two-legs," he said again.

"Alright, no two-legs," the she-cat said as she laid Darkpaw down on something that was soft and smelled of wood and dust and something similar to the Thunder Path. "Now hold still and I'll dry you off."

"I don't need your help," Darkpaw said, trying to make his voice sound stronger than it was.

"Stranger, I think you need all the help you can get and if you're so afraid of two-legs then I'm all you've got," the she-cat said and began licking the water and blood off Darkpaw's coat. "My, you are in a state," she mentioned between licks, "This don't look so much like a dog no more. What really happened to you?"

"My friends weren't very happy when I decided I didn't want to hang out with them anymore," Darkpaw said.

"Don't look like they were very good friends to me."

"No, they weren't." Darkpaw felt slightly comforted by this she-cat. She talked similarly to Mudriver. But remembering his friends and former life was painful and he tried to block the memories out, especially when Windlegs flashed into his mind.

"My name's Hope," the she-cat said suddenly, ending Darkpaw's train of thought.

"What?" he asked.

"My name's Hope," she said again, "What's yours?"

"Uh." Darkpaw wasn't sure how to respond. He didn't want to tell her 'Darkpaw' or 'Darkstripepaw' or even 'Darkstripe'. All those were clan names and he wasn't a clan cat anymore. "I don't have a name," he said finally.

Hope cocked her head to the side. "You ain't got a name? Nonsense, everyone's got a name."

"Not me."

"Why?"

"Why? Well…it makes it harder for my enemies to find me," he explained.

"You don't look real old and you seem nice enough. How can you have enemies?" Hope asked.

Darkpaw flicked his sore tail over his various wounds. "I didn't have very nice friends."

"Still, it's sad to have no name." Hope was quiet for a while then asked, "Can I name you?"

"What would you name me?" Darkpaw asked.

"I don't know, yet. I need some time to figure it out, but for now, I think I'll just call you 'Blue' since I know at least one of your eyes is a real pretty blue."

'Real pretty blue.' Darkpaw couldn't recall his eyes ever having been described that way before. He decided he didn't mind it and he didn't mind the title either. "Alright. You can call me 'Blue'."

"It's only temporary, until I figure you out," Hope said.

Darkpaw smiled. "Until you figure me out. How long do you think I'm going to stay?"

"At least until you heal up a bit. Or…you can stay longer if you like." Hope looked away shyly.

"I guess we'll figure it out sooner or later," Darkpaw said.

Hope slept beside him that night, wrapping her slightly larger body around his and keeping him warm. It took Darkpaw longer to get to sleep. He couldn't stop thinking of those he'd left behind and part of him was frightened that the darker side of him would torment him again. But he felt safe here with Hope and finally drifted off.

/

Darkpaw stayed with Hope for several days. He'd been relieved to discover that she could hunt and would bring him fat mice or share rats with him every day. He told her about different herbs she could use to treat his wounds and how to use cobwebs, which were plentiful in the shed, to wrap his still-bleeding wounds. She turned out to be a skilled medicine cat and he wondered if that's what she would be if she were a forest cat. But he tried not to think about the forest too much. When he did, he became sad and Hope could see the sadness in his eyes. She didn't pressure him for information on where he came from and he couldn't bring himself to tell her. She did not hate him or fear him and he wanted it to stay that way. He didn't know how she'd react if he told her all that he'd done.

She continued to call him 'Blue' and was delighted when the swelling in his eye went down to reveal that both his eyes were 'that real pretty color'. Every morning, she'd wake him by gently licking his ears and whispering 'Wake up, Blue. The sky is waiting to be made jealous.' The sky wasn't always blue. The second night Darkpaw stayed it had rained. Hope had laughed and said, 'The sky is crying because she's so ugly by comparison.'

When Darkpaw asked if she'd just name him Sky, Hope had answered playfully, "First you ruin her pride, now you want to take her name? I thought you were nicer than that." Then she'd nuzzled his face and whispered into his ear, "Besides, it doesn't do you justice," as though the sky might actually hear her.

Every night, Darkpaw would ask, "Do you know my name, yet?" To which Hope would answer, "Not yet. I don't know you're secret, yet. I need more time."

Darkpaw was rather enjoying the time he was giving her. Hope took exquisite care of him and spent as much time as possible with him. They spoke about all sorts of things and never once did Hope try to bring up his past. She slept beside him every night and Darkpaw began to think she was acting as some sort of barrier to keep all his nightmares away because he hadn't had a single one since his arrival. She certainly fit her name well and Darkpaw told her that.

"That's the point of a name. It tells who you are. That's why I have to wait before I give you your name so that it fits you just as well," she'd responded.

Darkpaw adored Hope and everything about her. But sometimes, the light would play tricks on him. As she danced for him in the sunlight as the frost covered the ground, he would sometimes swear that her long, red fur would turn short and pure white and her legs would become a startling silver and her eyes would turn pale blue. This would happen for only a fraction of a second. By the time Darkpaw realized it was happening, the fur would once again become red and white and the paws jet black and the eyes that looked upon him with such love were amber.

/

"Wake up, Blue. The sky's crying again," Hope said softly.

Darkpaw groaned and rolled over. "Then I'll stay in here with my eyes shut and you by my side until she calms down."

"But you never know when that might be. Maybe she'll never get over it," Hope laughed.

"Then we'll stay here together forever," Darkpaw said.

Hope smiled and licked his forehead. "Forever can wait. I'll get us some food."

Darkpaw reluctantly let her go and snuggled up in the place where she had been, inhaling her scent which had become more natural since his arrival due to the fact that she almost never saw her two-legs anymore.

His tranquil attitude was destroyed by a sudden hiss from outside. Darkpaw immediately jumped up and rushed out to see what was going on. Hope was standing talking to two other toms. Her tail was lashing back and forth and her back was arched with her beautiful red fur raised all along her spine.

"Cut the crap, Hope," one of the toms was saying, "We know you've been hanging around with a new tom."

"We just wanna talk to him," the other said.

"You ain't gonna do nothing but get your asses off my territory," Hope growled, a noise Darkpaw had never heard from her before.

"Don't make us hurt you," the first tom threatened.

"Funny, I was about to say the same to you," Darkpaw said, stepping out into the open.

"Blue!" Hope said, turning to him.

"That your real name, tabby?" the first tom asked.

"Who wants to know?" Darkpaw shot back.

"Just a few friends of ours. See, they been looking for a silver tabby. Said he'd be real beat up and we said we seen a tom like that hanging out with our girl here so we offered to do some investigating."

"I ain't your girl, Trash!" Hope shouted.

The tom turned and scowled at her. "It's 'Thrash', Hope, we've been over that. Do you need me to teach it to you, again?"

"You get your filthy paws anywhere near her and I'll rip your tail off and strangle you with it. Then I'll take your buddy over there and let him see what it's like to look through your eyes," Darkpaw growled, his claws fully extended.

Thrash self-consciously flicked his tail and blinked his eyes. "You know what, even if you ain't who I'm looking for, I'll tear you up anyway. Dozer, let's get him!"

The tom's lunged at Darkpaw, but a sudden flash of red interfered with their black coats. Darkpaw was shoved back into the shed before he could react. Hope slashed at the two toms, but they were clearly better fighters and easily got the upper hand. Dozer pinned the she-cat down and Thrash angrily inspected a cut on his shoulder. Darkpaw tried to go out and help her, but his foot was trapped in some two-leg tool and he couldn't free himself.

"Little bitch, you ain't even fucking worth it anymore," Thrash snarled.

Hope continued to struggle against Dozer's greater weight, continuing to look defiant even as Thrash raised his claws.

"NO!" Darkpaw screamed as the claws came down and red gushed out over Hope's white throat.

"Oh, don't worry, tabby, we didn't forget about you," Thrash said as he and Dozer sloshed through the rain-soaked grass to where he lay trapped. The black toms wrenched him free and dragged him out into the rain.

Darkpaw didn't even fight back as he stared helplessly at the body of his friend. He remembered the conversation they'd had the night before.

'_I'm surprised you haven't asked me about my past.'_

'_Why?'_

'_I thought you'd be curious.'_

'_I am, but it's your story to tell if you wanna. What good'll my forcing you to do it be?'_

'_I guess you have a point.'_

'_I do, but fact is, you're past won't help me. It'll only help you.'_

'_What?'_

'_Everyone has a past. That past make's them who they are. It makes them capable of handling the future. If you tell me your past, maybe it'll help you come to terms with it.' Thunder rumbled somewhere in the distance and Hope smiled. 'Maybe it won't be as stormy.'_

She was right, of course. It seemed she was always right. Darkpaw did have a past. He was a killer in that past and no one could touch him. He had tried to run away from it, but he now knew that he could never escape it. It was time to stop running. Time to embrace who he was.

Darkpaw wrenched himself free and threw the toms back. "Don't you fucking touch me, bastards," he hissed.

"Oh, so the kid's got some spine," Dozer said.

"Yeah, but you won't for long." Darkpaw raced at the toms. Even though it was raining and their scents were faint, Darkpaw's gift could track them. With skill and precision that overcame his stiff muscles, he ripped Dozer open from stomach to jaw without ever allowing Thrash to touch him. He pinned Thrash quickly and opened his eyes to look down at him.

"Listen, _Trash_, I'd love to make you scream for mercy right now, but I'm in a bit of a hurry," he said before cutting the tom's throat. Blood sprayed over him, but the rain quickly began rinsing it away.

"B-Blue…" came Hope's weak voice.

Darkpaw immediately rushed to her side. She wasn't dead, but she would be soon. He didn't even have to use his gift to see it. She'd lost too much blood. He glanced over at all the blood he'd just spilled. If only he could give it to her! "Hope, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!"

"Don't be, Blue. I know your name," Hope said. Her voice was hoarse and her body convulsed periodically.

"What? Hope, save your strength. I'll find a way to help you. I will!"

"I know your name, Blue! I know it. Listen to me," Hope insisted.

"Alright. Alright, I'm listening. What's my name?" Darkpaw asked, kneeling down to hear her better. He was on the verge of breaking down.

"It's 'Secret'. Your name is 'Secret'," Hope whispered.

"Secret? Why Secret?" Darkpaw asked.

"You're precious to those who have you. Not just anyone can. And those who know you, really know you, they feel special for it. They try to contain you, but they have to tell someone. You have to spread or there's something missing in the world. I'm so glad I knew you."

Darkpaw was crying now. "Hope, I'm a killer. My name is 'Murderer' or 'Monster'. I'm not precious."

"You have the power to destroy. Most secrets do. But you're still wonderful. You were my secret. I'm sorry I couldn't guard you better, but I'd be selfish to think I could really keep you all to myself. But now there's something I have to tell you. I had a secret of my own."

Darkpaw leaned down closer, straining to hear over the pounding of the rain and his heart.

"I love you, Secret," Hope whispered. Then her body was still.

"Hope? HOPE! NO!" Darkpaw yowled over the wind and the rain and the sound of his heart as it fell into his stomach and shattered.

The two-legs heard his scream and opened the door of their nest. They saw him standing over Hope's body, still with blood clinging to his fur. They shouted something in their language and something was thrown at him as one of them darted out. Darkpaw ran off, just barely missing getting hit with something large and heavy.

/

Darkpaw was running again. Seemed he was always running somewhere. He'd thought he was done running with Hope. But Hope was gone and so were Thrash and Dozer and the band of rouges that had been looking for him. It hadn't been hard to find where they were waiting for the black toms to return. Darkpaw had slaughtered them all, even a young she-cat that was younger than he was. And he was pretty sure one of the older she-cats had recently given birth, but he was too distraught to care. They'd come looking for him. They'd found him. The rain had turned to sleet, but Darkpaw didn't try to seek shelter. Not until the sleet turned into hail did Darkpaw finally give in and duck into a rocky cave.

He was tired. He hadn't eaten all day. He felt emotionally exhausted, his grieving hadn't let up in the slightest and the terrible weather didn't help. Some of that hail had definitely bruised him over his healing cuts. He began to clean himself half-heartedly.

There was a crack of thunder and Darkpaw thought he heard a voice. He looked around, but saw no one. He decided his mind must be playing tricks on him. Then it happened again and Darkpaw distinctly heard his name.

"Who's there?" he shouted, but only his echo answered. "Show yourself!" Again, only an echo. He might have just been paranoid, but Darkpaw got the feeling there was something in here with him. He didn't really have anywhere else to go anyway and began making his way deeper into the cave.

He hesitated before he slipped into a narrow tunnel, an unexplainable force pulling him onward. Lightening flashed and illuminated the path ahead of him before he was plunged back into darkness. He glanced back. If there were too many turns, he was worried he might not find his way back, but something in him told him that he'd be fine. Or maybe it was that thing calling to him. Regardless, he kept going, using his gift to try to get a feel for where he was. He truly felt apprehensive when he discovered that he couldn't smell anything. Not even bugs crawling on the walls. The rain and lightening and thunder faded away. He couldn't tell whether or not his eyes were open in this total darkness. The only sound he could hear was his heartbeat echoing down the corridor. Soon, he couldn't even turn around or look over his shoulder. If he wanted out now, he'd have to back out. Part of him kept expecting the floor to suddenly drop out beneath him and he'd plunge to his death. Maybe he'd hit a dead end. Maybe a pack of rats were waiting for him at the end of this tunnel. Maybe more rogues. This could easily be a trap and he was wandering right into it.

Suddenly, the floor became a steep slope and he slid uncontrollably through the darkness. When he reached the bottom, his momentum threw him forward until he hit a dead end with a grunt. There must have been an opening at the top of this place he was in because he could feel thinning rain drops hitting his body, but any light source was covered and the place was still pitch black. He stood and shook himself off. There was more space here where he was, he could turn around. Maybe if he could get back to the place where he'd come in…no, that ramp had been way too steep. He'd never make it up. Perhaps there was another opening. A pang of panic struck him as he wondered if there was no way out. Would he have gone through all he had just to die in a hole with no one ever knowing what had become of him? He scrambled along the rocky floor, trying to find a way out. He rammed into another wall. He ran blindly through the dark. This place he was in seemed rectangular in shape. To his horror, he couldn't find an exit. Not even the hole he'd come in through. He squeezed his eyes shut tight and could still sense nothing. No, he didn't want to die. Not here. Not like this. Starved to death all alone.

"StarClan, help me," he whispered as a final attempt. He didn't really expect anything to happen. But he suddenly realized that the rain had stopped. The clouds were carried away from the almost full moon and light shone down into the cavern, reflecting off of a perfectly smooth stone in the center. Darkpaw stared in wonder as the cavern was revealed to him. "No way," he whispered. He knew immediately that he must be in high rocks, having taken an afore-unknown back entrance. What he'd run into in his initial fall was not the other side, but the moonstone itself and in his foolish blind panic he had run circles around it, never finding either entrance. Now the moonstone was illuminated and, as he was completely alone, he presumed it was for him. The perfect surface glistened with the sheen of a million raindrops and each pin-drop of light reflected in Darkpaw's blue eyes like the stars themselves were shining at midday.

It was obvious to Darkpaw what he needed to do, but he worried that he might be wrong. But having nothing left to lose, he stepped forward and placed his nose hesitantly to the smooth surface. Immediately, his eyes grew too heavy to keep open and his lids slammed shut and his body crumpled to the floor with a soft _thud_.

/

_Darkpaw was back in the in-between place where he'd met Oakbelly. StarClan to his right. The dark forest to his left. Behind him an endless path. But in front of him was a new face. Well, it wasn't truly new, but it had been moons since he'd seen it last._

"_Ratkit," he breathed, almost afraid that the sound would make the image disappear._

_The small, brown tom smiled. "Hello, little brother." Such a strong voice he had now and his coat was beautiful as were his brilliant eyes. It was strange for Darkpaw to be called 'little' when the tom before him clearly appeared younger than himself, but Ratkit was indeed the elder._

"_Ratkit it…it's really you," Darkpaw said._

"_Of course it's me," Ratkit laughed, "Who else would I be?"_

"_A…a trick," Darkpaw said and began backing away. Surely this was some sort of cruel trick. His alter ego was probably responsible._

"_I'm no trick, little brother, and you and I are the only ones here, I swear."_

_Darkpaw looked around, they were indeed alone._

"_I have missed you." Ratkit's yellow eyes held such sincere love that Darkpaw believed him immediately. "I wish I could have been an apprentice with you. Every day I see you training I feel a little jealous that I couldn't be your competition, your den mate, your friend…your brother." Ratkit looked rather sad by the end of his statement._

_Darkpaw suddenly remembered that Ratkit had been apprentice age when he'd died. Older, in fact. Nearly seven moons. It was hard for Darkpaw to remember, he'd always felt like the elder to Ratkit. Ratkit appeared so fragile and in need of protection. He didn't anymore. Now he looked as capable as any other apprentice. He had the promise to be the warrior Snaketail always claimed he would be._

"_Why did you call me here, Ratkit? I know it was you," Darkpaw demanded. As happy as he was to see Ratkit, part of him felt like he needed to get out of here as quickly as possible. He had to get away from the clan territories before he was discovered again._

"_I'd figure you knew," Ratkit responded._

"_Well I don't and I have a hard time believing you just wanted to catch up." Darkpaw was beginning to feel uneasy. "This can't be real."_

"_It's very real. But your denial of that is part of the reason I called you here. Why did you lose your faith?" Ratkit asked._

"_You mean you wouldn't? Come on, Ratkit, StarClan don't care about me. It took some time, but I finally realized that. Real or not, I've got no place here," Darkpaw said bitterly._

"_That's not true. StarClan love you as they love all the clan cats. You've got a chance to become a warrior here same as everyone else."_

"_Not everyone. You never got that chance," Darkpaw spat._

"_I'll get my chance. You will help me get my chance, in fact, if you choose the right path. There's hope for me just like there's hope for you."_

"_There's no hope for me!" Darkpaw snapped. "My hope was murdered just like my mother and just like all those cats I killed. Dead! Gone! I'll never get them back no matter how much I want to! Even those I killed, I'd do anything to bring them back! But they'll never come back." Darkpaw was close to crying, now, the pain in his chest worse than ever. He fell to the ground, sobbing dryly, clawing at the ground, wishing for the only comfort he'd ever had that was now destroyed. But something appeared beside him. He opened his eyes and wasn't surprised to see Ratkit laying next to him. He leaned into the thick brown fur and buried his face in it._

_Soon enough, he calmed down. He stood and took a few paces away from Ratkit. "I have to go back, don't I?" he said bitterly._

"_You don't have to do anything. I certainly won't force you to go back," Ratkit answered._

_Darkpaw smiled ruefully. "No, of course you wouldn't. That would make this too easy, wouldn't it? It's my moral choice to make. My choice whether or not to die, just as it's always been."_

"_You won't die."_

"_How do you know?" Darkpaw whirled around to face Ratkit. "You know what I've done! I deserve to die for those crimes and ShadowClan will agree. They'll rip me to pieces!"_

"_Will they really? Or is that just what you want them to do?" Ratkit asked, standing also._

"_It's what they should do," Darkpaw said. He looked at his paws._

"_Then run away."_

"_What?" Darkpaw looked up at Ratkit in disbelief._

"_Go on, run. You're used to running, aren't you? Run away from here. Far away. Disappear. Those you love never need to know what you've done, never need to know what's become of you. Your name will fade with their memories. Leave your story unfinished." Ratkit's face was dead serious, his eyes trained on Darkpaw's, trapping the tabby with his stare._

_At last, Darkpaw found his voice. "I…I can't. I thought the ringfighters would kill me, they didn't, but I thought they would. I went anyway because it had to be finished. My friends deserve the same courtesy. But then, you know that."_

"_Blackstar is a just leader and ShadowClan can be forgiving. I don't think you'll be killed."_

"_And what if I am?"_

"_Then I will be right here waiting for you, my brother, but I hope you keep me waiting for a very long time."_

_Darkpaw looked at Ratkit for a long time, his heart filling with love for the brown tom. He walked over and gently touched his nose to Ratkit's._

/

Darkpaw awoke as a cloud passed over the moon. He looked up at the sky, the stars reflecting in his eyes as the rain had done. "StarClan, help me," he whispered.

It took the rest of the night and part of the morning to get to the path through WindClan territory since much of the area had flooded. Darkpaw ran the path as quickly as he could, not wanting to get spotted by any patrols. It was getting later in the evening by the time he broke through the briars and into ShadowClan camp. The clan was sharing tongues peacefully, but his arrival sparked sudden excitement.

"Great StarClan, you're back!" Thundertail cried and rushed in to press her nose to the tabby fur. "Where have you been? We looked everywhere for you! We began to worry you were dead. Mudriver's probably out looking for you now!"

"Go and get him, I need to make an announcement," Darkpaw said calmly, though his heart was pounding a million miles a minute and it wasn't just from the run.

Blackstar pushed through the crowd of shocked faces. He didn't look as relieved to see the tabby apprentice as Thundertail had. "Where have you been, Darkpaw?" the leader demanded.

Darkpaw dipped his head. "Please, Blackstar, I swear I will explain everything as soon as Mudriver gets here," he promised.

Blackstar gave him a hard look but agreed to allow him to explain to the clan. Darkpaw's stomach pained him and he realized that he hadn't eaten for two days. He glanced at the fresh kill pile but dared not touch it.

Thundertail returned shortly with Mudriver. "Darkpaw!" the gray warrior shouted and rushed to his apprentice, but Blackstar blocked his path.

"Alright, Darkpaw, explain yourself," Blackstar said.

"May I speak from the tree so everyone can see and hear me?" Darkpaw asked.

Blackstar gave him a short nod and accompanied him up into the lower branches of the tree.

Darkpaw looked out over the curious faces. His heart was still pounding and this time he knew it wasn't from the run. Mudriver, Thundertail, and Windlegs all looked up at him wide-eyed. How long had it been since he'd last seen them? A week? More? He couldn't remember. He'd stopped counting the days spent with Hope. He mentally shook his head. He couldn't think of her now.

"ShadowClan I…I'm really not sure how to explain this. You want to know where I was, well, I've been to several places. On the night of my disappearance, I left the territory to meet up with a group of cats that call themselves the ringfighters. They get together each night and have fights to the death. For many moons, I joined them on occasion." The faces looked even more shocked as Darkpaw described to them each fight he'd participated in for half his life. Each murder he described struck him with a pang of guilt that he'd never felt before. He did not reveal the parts about Ghost or Reaper. "I committed each of these acts of my own free will without being forced into anything," he said after describing the brutal murders of Frost, Slash, and Honeydew. He then went on to explain that he'd returned to put an end to his involvement. He explained how he was attacked by the gamblers, confessed that they had been on the hunt for him when Windlegs had saved him, and then told about the gauntlet. Next came the part that struck a deep cord of pain within him: Hope. He revealed their time together up to her murder, because of him, and then how he'd slaughtered the ringfighters that had been looking for him. But he didn't mention his visit to the moonstone. When he was finished, he lept down and looked up at Blackstar. "That's all I have to confess. Deal with me however you see fit," he said.

Blackstar, like the rest of the clan, at first seemed too shocked to move. There was something behind Blackstar's eyes that Darkpaw couldn't quite see or understand, but he didn't think much of it, guessing it must be disgust. Disgust was written on the faces of most of the other warriors.

"You murderous bastard! I should have known! I knew you were no good! I say we kill him, Blackstar!" came Snaketail's voice and many of the others chorused in with agreement.

Darkpaw didn't respond. In a way, he felt Snaketail was absolutely right this time. Then a few cats jumped on him and held him down.

"Drag him to the river! We'll drown him!" shouted one warrior.

"Don't waste your time! Just kill him here!" shouted another.

Darkpaw was being pulled in several different directions. A few distant voices sounded like they were shouting "Stop! Leave him alone!" and" Wait for what Blackstar has to say!" and "Would you commit the same crime? Give him a chance!", but he wasn't sure he picked up Thundertail, Mudriver, or Windlegs's voices in there. Claws dug into his skin, but he didn't pay attention to it. He was being held on his back and was staring up at the stars that were coming into view. One twinkled directly above him. _Ratkit, please forgive me. You can't have known everything I did. Please, brother, wait for me, _he prayed.

"Enough!" shouted Blackstar. He lept down into the mob and scattered the cats holding Darkpaw and a few other warriors moved to surround the tabby to prevent another attack. Blackstar glanced down at the tabby before looking out over the crowd. "I will have order! Like it or not, this tabby is still your clanmate and I'll not have you lynching him just because you feel like it!"

"But, Blackstar, all that he's done!" came Thicketclaw's voice.

"I'll handle it how I choose," Blackstar cut in. He turned to Littlecloud. "Take him to your den and don't let him out of your sight," he ordered.

Littlecloud nodded. "Darkpaw, you know where to go," he said.

Darkpaw walked slowly in front of Littlecloud through the crowd who parted for him as though he carried some disease. His body felt too heavy. His head was down, but he caught glimpses of some of the cats. Most of them were looking at him in hatred and disgust. Some just looked shocked. He caught sight of Mudriver, Thundertail, and Windlegs all sitting together. They all had the same look on their faces before they looked away. Hurt. Betrayal. And somehow, that was worse than anything else. After all the horrible things he'd said about and to them before his disappearance, now they'd never forgive him. He caught Tigerstripe's eye for a moment before the tabby warrior looked away. Darkpaw thought he'd recognized Tigerstripe's voice telling the mob to wait for Blackstar's orders. He passed through the crowd and chanced lifting his head just a bit as he drew closer to Littlecloud's den. Two sets of eyes he'd forgotten about were trained on him from the nursery. They didn't look away nor did they seem to hold any definite emotion. To this, Darkpaw lowered his head again.

In the den, Littlecloud checked over his wounds, but there was really nothing more he could do for them. They were mostly healed already. Hope had done an amazing job. Littlecloud didn't speak to him, but there was really nothing left to say.

For hours, Darkpaw waited. Daring to hope one last time that one of his friends would come to him. He wasn't surprised when they didn't. He wasn't even hurt. He wouldn't visit himself if he were them. Saying all those things out loud had revealed to him just how horrific they were. But Blackstar hadn't let them kill him. Maybe he had a chance to make this right.

The night was almost over before someone did come into the den. A flutter in Darkpaw's chest hoped it was Windlegs or Mudriver or Thundertail. The logical part of him said it was probably Blackstar. And for a moment he feared it was Tigerstripe or even Snaketail. When he looked to see who it was, he was surprised to find none of them. Instead, it was Speckledthorn carrying a vole in his jaws. Even more surprising, Speckledthorn set the vole right in front of Darkpaw.

"What's this?" the tabby asked.

"I thought you might be hungry. You look like you haven't eaten in a while," Speckledthorn said simply.

Darkpaw gave him a suspicious look. "Um, so? Don't you hate me like everyone else?"

"No."

"Didn't you hear what I did?"

"Yes."

"Then why don't you hate me? What's wrong with you?" Darkpaw exclaimed.

"Darkpaw, we've been over this. I don't hate anyone. I've never hated anyone. I hope I never do hate anyone. I don't like what you did. It sickens me and from the look on your face when you were explaining it, I think it sickens you too. I don't know why you did what you did. But the fact is you did it. There's no going back. You confessed all that for a reason, and I don't think that reason was so that you could receive even more hatred. I don't know if you want to make it right or what it is, but I think that you're a good cat and I think you always have been. And I also think that there's more to the story than you told us. But that's just me and I'll never really understand because I can't be you. Now, if you want the vole, eat it," Speckledthorn said calmly.

"Did Blackstar say to feed me?" Darkpaw asked.

"No. This is my share, but I ate yesterday, unlike you. So if we're going to discuss who's more deserving-"

"If we're going to discuss who's more deserving, you'd win," Darkpaw cut in.

"Yes, but if we're going to discuss who needs it more, eat the vole. You don't deserve to lay here starving to death because of your mistakes." With that, Speckledthorn stood and began walking out of the den.

"I'm a murderer," Darkpaw mumbled.

Speckledthorn paused and looked at him over his shoulder. "My parents were murderers. Many of the cats here were as well including our leader. If they can be forgiven, then you should not be condemned."

"And what about lying to the clan? Breaking the warrior code? What about that?" Darkpaw asked.

"I don't know, Darkpaw. I won't lie. This is a serious mess you've gotten yourself into. Your punishment is entirely up to Blackstar."

"What would you do to me if you were leader?" Darkpaw asked.

Speckledthorn was silent for a moment. "I would find a way to help you choose which path you truly desire." Speckledthorn left.

That night, Darkpaw dreamt of Hope's death.

/

The next night was the night of the gathering. Darkpaw had spent the entire day alone except for one time when Windlegs came in. She'd looked so hurt that Darkpaw couldn't even bear to look at her and turned away until she left.

Blackstar's voice rang through the camp as he announced who would be attending the gathering. To Darkpaw's shock, and likely the shock of the rest of the clan, he called every warrior and even Darkpaw himself.

"What's going on?" Darkpaw had asked Littlecloud when the medicine cat came to collect him. Littlecloud didn't respond but looked nervous and even a bit sympathetic. "He's not going to tell the other clans, is he?"

Darkpaw wanted more than anything to be walking between Mudriver and Thundertail again, but instead he was flanked by Littlecloud and Blackstar at the head of the clan. There was no slipping away as they burst into the clearing. Littlecloud led him to the front of the crowd right before the great rock. The other clans seemed as confused as Darkpaw at seeing all the ShadowClan warriors present. ShadowClan was the last clan to arrive and the gathering started immediately with the other three clans going first.

Blackstar appeared almost hesitant as he approached the front, but squared his jaw and began. At first, there was nothing special about the news, but Darkpaw could feel something coming. Blackstar finally mentioned Darkpaw's disappearance and return.

"Darkpaw has been a ShadowClan apprentice for six moons. He has technically completed his warrior training and is ready to receive his warrior name. But certain events have been brought to my attention. I do not wish to disclose the details at this time, but they were heinous and require discipline. Darkpaw, step forward."

Darkpaw felt his heart pounding again, but he dared not disobey.

"I say this at a gathering so that all the clans may understand my judgment. Darkpaw, I do not believe that you are bad, not at heart, but the things you have told me and the rest of ShadowClan have forced me to wonder and I have a clan to protect. Therefore, I hereby banish you from ShadowClan territory for six moons. If you return in six moons, then I will welcome you back into ShadowClan as my warrior. If you try to return early, you will be killed. And if you do not return after exactly six moons, do not return at all." A flash of pain slipped over Blackstar's face, but it was gone in an instant. Gasps and murmurs had risen up amongst the clans.

Darkpaw's eyes were wide in pure horror. "Blackstar…please…Blackstar, don't do this to me! I'm sorry for what I did! Please, let me make it right!" he cried. Leaf bare was almost over. There would be more prey. He could do so much more hunting. He could take care of the clan. He could prove himself!

But Blackstar's face became a mask. "If you want to do the right thing, then I will see you six gatherings from now," he said flatly.

Darkpaw backed away then turned around to face the crowd. All eyes were trained on him. Waiting for something. With his eyes he begged someone to not let this happen, but no one said a word. Darkpaw turned back to the great rock. "My name, Blackstar. What will my warrior name be if I return? Will it be Darkstripe? Would I go through this exile just to be labeled as my father for the rest of my life?" he demanded.

Blackstar stared down at the tabby. Then he looked up at the sky. "I say these words before StarClan that they may hear and approve. Darkstripepaw, no matter the mistakes you have made, you were an apprentice of ShadowClan. Mudriver, though he was young, was a great mentor to you. If, in six moons time, you return to this place and request acceptance back into ShadowClan, you will henceforth be known as Darkshadow," he announced before the stunned crowd.

Darkpaw nodded. "Darkshadow…Six gathering from now, you will see me again. Six gatherings from now, I will return to claim that name," he vowed. Then, without another word and without looking at anyone, he left the clearing.

"I hope you do," Blackstar whispered after him.

_**End of Part 1**_

**Will he return? You'll have to wait and find out. Or, just as with the last chapter, stop here and make up your own ending. Now, I already know I'm gonna get crap for this chapter, but I wanted this to happen and therefore it did. I know I'm breaking rules, but it's necessary for the story. And I did get a few unhappy customers with the last chapter as well and I'm sorry, I know it wasn't the best, but it was necessary. Also, the strange feel to it that many of you described, well, when the main character goes bonkers, that tends to happen. However, I do apologize because I know I could have gone about it better. What I think happened was that I seemed to have forgotten that you guys don't know what's going on in my head, but I hope I fixed that with this chapter. If I didn't, well, sorry in advance. And I know I didn't reply to reviews last time, terribly sorry, but you know how life gets. I'll try to respond to these ones assuming I have an audience left. Hey, school's over! No more high school for me! Yay!**


	33. Chapter 32

**Well, guys, high school is over which means it's time for me to move on to bigger and better things. College, work, yes I'll be entering adulthood soon. My schedule is going to be packed. And that's just as well. It's time for me to put away childish things. And so, I will be continuing this story no further. Thank you all for staying with me as long as you did. It really means the world to me. Don't be sad, we had a good run, right? Happy memories that none of us will ever forget until we realize how much more important everything else in life is. Farewell all…**

**KIDDING! Totally kidding! Oh my god, who fell for that? I wish I could have seen your faces! Do you really think I'd put over two years of work into this damn thing just to pack it in when bigger challenges came along? HELL NO! I'm looking forward to it. Don't worry about it, I WILL finish this story even if I get hit by a truck and die and go to Hell and have to write it down there and then claw my way up out of the pit to possess some poor bastard so they post it for me for each and every one of the remaining chapters!**

**Now, with that silliness out of the way, on to part two of ****What's in a Name****…**

"_Though thou call'st thyself a hotter name than any is in Hell."_

_-Macbeth: William Shakespeare_

~X~

_The cat beneath him struggled and gasped for breath only a moment longer before his long fangs snapped its spine. Before it was even announced, he stormed past the bright rings of fire to the outskirts of the crowd. He heard a few murmured congratulations but ignored them. A dark tom was greedily collecting items from other cats and handing some out to others then called for bets to be placed for the next round. He rolled his eyes and a familiar feeling came over him. The feeling of being…dirty. But he must push that from his mind. Wouldn't last long here thinking like that._

_Then he saw him, the tabby tom waiting just beyond the light of the fires. Beside him was another tabby, but he was hardly visible in the shadow of the other. The only thing one could really see about him was his glinting blue eyes. Those eyes…_

_Then, he was in the camp. Wide, bright blue eyes raced toward him, then past him, not even seeing. They belonged to a kit. The kit raced toward the fresh kill pile and began desperately tugging at the ear of a rabbit nearly twice its size. The kit couldn't move the rabbit, that was obvious enough, but it didn't give up. It pulled and then raced around the carcass to push, all the while letting out pained, hopeless mewls._

_He wanted to help it. Should help it. But he didn't. Why didn't he? There was that feeling again. Dirty. A dark mist started seeping into the clearing, surrounding everything starting with the nursery, then on to the apprentices' den, elders' den, medicine cat's den, leader's den, warriors' den. It choked the exit, choked everything. It blocked out the very sky._

_The kit paid no attention to any of this, only grew more frantic in his impossible task. _

_He should help him. Maybe then he wouldn't feel so very dirty._

_The mist began to gather into a form. Huge paws with frightening claws extending all the way across the clearing. Long legs leading up to a heaving chest that narrowed into a neck crested by a fierce feline head. This dark cat-like apparition twisted its jaws into a deranged grin, long fangs gleaming._

_The kit was still right there. Have to get it away. Danger. Danger! Save it! Warn it!_

_Finally the tiny creature looked up, appearing even more helpless before this god-like being of darkness. The enormous feline let out a laugh very like thunder and the ground shook. The kit screamed as the jaws came streaking down toward it._

_Move! Save it!_

_The jaws slammed shut and the scream was cut off._

~X~

Blackstar awoke with a start, shooting up from his nest. Panting, he looked about his den. Sunlight trickled in through the entrance but warmed nothing. A dream. Only a dream. _That_ dream…again.

With a groan, Blackstar forced himself to his paws and gave a great stretch and yawn. He shook any excess bedding from his fur and wandered out into the camp.

Almost immediately, a heavy gray form slammed into him. He looked down at the form in alarm as it stumbled a bit, eyes looking straight at the ground. Blackstar was about to ask Mudriver if he was alright, but the tom hardly paused before stepping around his leader and going off to join the dawn patrol. Blackstar sighed, what was he expecting? He looked over at the patrol and saw that Mudriver had joined Thundertail, but he did not even look up to acknowledge her greeting. Blackstar saw the black she-cat sigh. Thundertail looked up and caught his eye. She gave him a smile, but it looked forced. He returned the smile with the same amount of difficulty. He finally continued on to his destination: the medicine cat's den.

Littlecloud was already up, of course, and bustling about making sure everything was ready for whatever problems may erupt during the day. He turned and greeted Blackstar.

"You look terrible," the tabby said.

"Thank you, Littlecloud, that's a fine way to start off my day," Blackstar grumbled.

"Don't blame me. StarClan knows why you won't tell me what's causing you to sleep so poorly," Littlecloud said, rifling through his herb storages.

"Then I'm sure if they wanted you to know, they'd tell you themselves," Blackstar replied.

Littlecloud sighed and returned a moment later with a small bundle of catnip. "That should perk you up a bit," he said.

Blackstar gratefully took it and nodded to the medicine cat before turning back to the exit.

"Although I still wish I knew why I was giving this to you," Littlecloud called after him.

"Like I said, if StarClan wanted you to know, they'd tell you," Blackstar called back before making his leave.

"They have," Littlecloud whispered under his breath before turning back to his herb stores. "I just pray that tonight your torment ends."

Blackstar looked about the camp. The warriors' den had emptied out and each cat was going to attend to their duties for the day. The leader looked, but saw no sign of Windlegs. Damn, he'd been hoping to speak with her before she disappeared to wherever she went until sundown. He knew he could probably put in the effort to find her, but not right now. Besides, it might very well take him until sundown to find her if she didn't wish to be found.

As Blackstar continued back to his den, a calico tom passed by on his way to the apprentices' den.

"Good morning, Blackstar," Speckledthorn said in a chipper voice, flashing the leader a genuine smile.

Blackstar suddenly got the feeling that this was the first genuine smile he'd received in moons and had the urge to return such a gesture to the tom, but try as he might, Blackstar could not muster up the true emotion. His mouth felt too heavy and he merely bowed his head as the calico trotted by. Speckledthorn, ever easy to please, was satisfied and went about his business.

Speckledthorn stopped in front of the apprentices' den entrance. "Stormpaw," he called in. Suddenly a small form landed on his shoulders and shoved the calico tom to the ground.

"You're dead!" Wildpaw laughed triumphantly.

"No, I don't think so. Good morning, Wildpaw," Speckledthorn said. "Would you mind letting me up? I need to take Stormpaw out for training."

The apprentice put one golden-brown paw on the warrior's throat. "Make me," she challenged.

Speckledthorn sighed, "I'm not going to fight you and you know it. Please, get off."

Wildpaw groaned and obediently leapt off the calico. She set to work grooming her paws. "You're really a lousy warrior, you know that? How, in StarClan's name, did _you_ wind up with an apprentice?"

"Don't be so unkind, sister," snapped a voice from the apprentices' den. Moments later, Mousepaw appeared with Stormpaw by his side. "You've never seen Speckledthorn in battle. You can pass no judgment on his warrior skills."

"Well I would have seen him in battle if he'd just fight me. Besides, have you ever been hunting with him? He's as graceful as an old badger," Wildpaw said.

"Speckledthorn is different from you and maybe he isn't the best hunter or the quickest fighter, but he has his own way of doing things and he gets what he needs to done. Blackstar knew what he was doing when he appointed Stormpaw to him. She will become a fine warrior. And I'm sure you will as well once you learn to stop trying to fight everything that moves," Mousepaw said.

"Hmph," Wildpaw grunted.

Speckledthorn chuckled. "I was a bit like you as a young apprentice, Wildpaw," he said, "but it seems my skills never quite developed to fit my lifestyle, so I changed. It was never really me anyway. You, though, will be quite like your mentor when you grow up, I think. Now, I really must take my leave. Come on, Stormpaw."

The gray she-cat glanced at her foster siblings before following her mentor out of the camp.

"Do you ever think she'll talk?" Wildpaw asked once the two were out of earshot.

Mousepaw shrugged. "I think she talks all the time, we just haven't learned how to listen."

"Very philosophical," Wildpaw said, rolling her eyes.

"I thought so," Mousepaw said with a grin.

"Where's Snowpaw?" the she-cat asked.

"Windlegs is still training her at night. She's asleep," Mousepaw said.

"And Clawpaw?"

"Tigerstripe already took him. I think they were on the dawn patrol."

"So it's just the two of us, again?"

The brown and white tabby nodded.

Wildpaw sighed. "Well then we better go. Thicketclaw and Tawnypelt will have our pelts if we're late."

"Agreed."

The two apprentices headed out of the clearing.

"I sense tension in the camp. Clawpaw feels it, too. He told me. It's been building," Mousepaw whispered as they made their way to the training area.

"Of course there is. Can you blame them? Tonight's the night," Wildpaw whispered back just as they reached their mentors.

~X~

"Mudriver, keep up, would you? Honestly, we'd be traveling faster if a kit were in your place!" snapped Russetfur.

"A kit or Speckledthorn," giggled one of the warriors to another and both tried unsuccessfully to disguise their laughter.

"You go on ahead, I'll talk to him," Thundertail said.

"Fine, but you better catch up. And I don't want to smell prey on either of you when you return," Russetfur growled

"Of course," Thundertail said.

The patrol sped on to the border, Russetfur at the head complaining of Mudriver's slowness.

Mudriver had come to a complete stop when Thundertail went back to him. He was staring down at the ground as usual. Thundertail worried it might do damage to his neck should he not lift his head occasionally. His fur wasn't as dirty as it used to be. He now sat quietly when Thundertail groomed him and didn't go to so much trouble to muss it up again. He still neglected it, however, so the shining silver was dingy.

"You need to keep up with the patrol," Thundertail said softly. "Russetfur will have your hide if you don't. You remember how she was before. She's just getting more annoyed."

Mudriver gave no response or even a spark of life.

"Come on, speak to me. You've always at least spoken to me. Don't shut me out now. Not when we're so close." Thundertail trailed off. "That's why, isn't it? You're so quiet now because tonight's the night. You aren't worried that…"

Mudriver looked up at her with cloudy, blood-shot, yellow eyes. His expression answered her question before she asked it.

"Don't worry about it. It's not going to happen. You know him better than that."

"I…I thought I did," came Mudriver's hoarse voice. "I ain't sure of nothing no more."

"No. No this you can be sure of. You saw the look on his face before he…Don't pretend you never turned back. Even glanced. You weren't turned away the whole time. You couldn't have been. You couldn't have forced yourself not to look."

"N what if you're right? What if he wantsta come, but can't? What if he ain't been able to for a while now and we just don't know?"

"Oh, no, brother, he's not…"

"How do ya know? You ain't seen him! Ain't nobody's seen him! N if he ain't here tonight, what they gonna think? They just gonna think he didn't wanna." Mudriver's shoulders began to shake and his voice grew thick. "But maybe he did and he just can't 'cause he…" Mudriver couldn't finish the sentence. He collapsed into sobs against his sister's chest.

Thundertail crooned softly, trying to comfort him. She wrapped her crooked, yellow tail around her brother's furry body. "It's alright. It's going to be alright. Worrying will do no good. We just have to wait for tonight."

"I…I know," Mudriver sobbed, struggling to control his trembling. "I…I just…I feel like I betrayed him. N if he don't come back…"

Thundertail said nothing. Eventually, Mudriver calmed down enough and they hurried to catch up to the rest of the patrol. Thundertail expected Russetfur to make some remark on how long it took them, but the ginger she-cat merely glanced at Mudriver and then hurried the patrol on their way.

"Tonight will either bring all this to an end or make it worse," Russetfur mumbled to herself.

~X~

"Quickly, now, don't give me an opening. Your defense must be as guarded as you keep your mind," Speckledthorn coached as he spared with Stormpaw.

The she-cat said nothing as she defended against the calico's attacks. She merely stared at him and watched his movements, studying everything silently.

"Russetfur will evaluate you and Clawpaw soon. If you can't beat the likes of me, you haven't a chance against her."

Speckledthorn kicked Stormpaw's paws out from under her. He leapt to pin her down as she rolled onto her back. His face was hardly a breath away from her as he gave her a confused look.

"Why did you-?"

His question was cut off as her hind legs dug into his stomach and she threw him off with powerful hind legs. Speckledthorn crashed to the ground and quickly felt the weight of Stormpaw upon him. He sensed her going in for the 'kill' and rolled onto his back, trying to drag her with him. He could not throw her off balance and didn't have time to attempt a kick before her fangs grazed his neck. Stormpaw straightened up and stared down at her mentor.

"Very good. Already, you are a better warrior than myself. How terribly embarrassing for me," Speckledthorn laughed. Stormpaw moved off of him and he stood. He shook himself then glanced over to see her staring into his eyes. He grinned. "I apologize, I know you don't like it when I talk about myself like that. But I'm not afraid to admit I have shortcomings. And I'll have you know that when I was an apprentice, I came very close to beating Russetfur."

Stormpaw sat down and wrapped her tail around her paws.

"Well, normally now the mentor would have his apprentice recite the warrior code, but that doesn't seem the case for us does it? Besides, I know you know it. Blackstar will just have to take my word for it."

Stormpaw smirked.

Speckledthorn gave her a warm smile, but it faded quickly and he gave a heavy sigh. "You can feel the tension, can't you? The apprehension. The gnawing curiosity that's possessed everyone. I can sense it. It's like a burning in my stomach. I can't even imagine what it must be like for you and Clawpaw." Speckledthorn's smile returned. "You know the answer to that. Of course you two will be going. There's no way Blackstar could leave you behind. After all, he saved your lives. You have the right to be among the first to know."

Stormpaw looked up at the sky. The sun was still high. Hours to go, yet.

"It worries me when you shut me out like that. How am I to be sure you'll let me back in?" Speckledthorn said.

Stormpaw looked back down at her mentor, giving him a mildly apologetic look.

"I kid of course. While I hope you always let me in, you have your own choices as to who you let in. Not to mention the privacy of your own thoughts."

Stormpaw's expression was warm, affection in her eyes for the calico.

"Let's get a bit more training in, then you can go hunting. You're positively brilliant at that. Must be your knack for silence compared to my complete failure at it."

Stormpaw fell into a battle-ready stance, but Speckledthorn flicked his tail and she gave him a look of confusion.

"Not that sort of training. Not hunting either. This lesson is the one thing I can honestly say I'm very good at, though it took me quite a while, but I think you are already well on your way to mastering it already. I'll admit that my mastery of it is in a different area than most, but it's a lesson I need to pass on to you nonetheless."

Stormpaw tilted her head to the side.

"It's simple, really. What I'm going to teach you is awareness. Follow me." And Speckledthorn dashed off into the forest, being surprisingly silent for him. Stormpaw followed him like a ghost.

~X~

"Clawpaw, stop daydreaming," Tigerstripe ordered. He had taken Clawpaw for training as soon as the dawn patrol had ended, but the cream tom seemed to prefer to spend his time gazing at the sky.

"I'm not daydreaming, Tigerstripe, I'm just thinking deeply," Clawpaw answered, still staring up at the sky.

"Well think deeply while training. Don't you want to become a warrior?" Tigerstripe snapped.

"Of course Tigerstripe," Clawpaw lowered his head, "I'm sorry. I suppose the excitement of the day is just getting to me."

Tigerstripe scoffed, "What's so exciting about today?"

"Well, not today, I suppose. Just the anticipation for tonight. Aren't you the least bit curious? Everyone else is."

"What's going to happen tonight will happen. I don't need to waste my day wondering and guessing at it. And neither should you. It won't change anything," Tigerstripe said.

"You're right, Tigerstripe, it won't. It just seems natural to be curious, and I think you are, too, you're just hiding it."

"I have duties to attend to."

"Ah, so you don't deny it."

Tigerstripe gave Clawpaw a withering look.

"You'll soon be rid of me. I do hope I can live up to your expectations, but I think I will," Clawpaw said.

Tigerstripe gave him a strange look.

Clawpaw smiled. "It's fine, Tigerstripe. I know you would have preferred to have my sister as your apprentice instead of me. And I can't blame you. She's much more interesting. Not to mention bigger and stronger."

"What do you mean?" Tigerstripe asked.

"Oh come now, Tigerstripe. With her mysterious silence and natural warrior abilities. Her subtle dark beauty that makes her look ShadowClan even if she isn't. She'd be a more impressive apprentice than me, admit it. And just think if you'd made the connection with her that Speckledthorn has! Surely you wouldn't feel so on the outside then."

Tigerstripe felt a chill run up his spine. "On the outside?"

Clawpaw nodded. "Of the clan. You seem more…secluded, it it's not too bold for me to say. Sort of like something's happened to make you feel you don't fit in as well as you used to."

"I appreciate your concern, Clawpaw, but I fear it's misplaced. I'm fine," Tigerstripe said, hoping to sound dismissive.

"My mistake then, sir," Clawpaw submitted.

"And I wouldn't prefer to have your sister as my apprentice, either. You're a fine apprentice soon to be a fine warrior."

Clawpaw dipped his head. "Thank you, Tigerstripe. It means a lot to hear you say that. Or is that something all mentors say to their apprentices before their ceremony?" The apprentice gave a small grin.

Tigerstripe thought back to his own training. "Well not…all mentors," he said finally.

"But all mentors want their apprentices to be the best. Some are more…forward about it than others, I'd assume."

Tigerstripe quirked an eyebrow. "Have I not been forward? Of course I expect you to be the best! Now stop wasting precious training time. We don't have much left."

Clawpaw laughed, "Yes, Tigerstripe." '_I hope you receive good news tonight, Tigerstripe,'_ he thought, dodging a blow aimed for his head.

~X~

Thicketclaw and Speckledthorn met up with each other just outside the camp entrance. Thicketclaw laughed at the badly torn rabbit dangling from the calico's jaws. Speckledthorn sighed and allowed her to enter the camp first to drop her two birds on the fresh kill pile.

"It baffles me that Stormpaw is such a good hunter when you're so…"

"Not?" Speckledthorn offered after dropping the rabbit on the pile.

"Yes. You poor thing, you're absolutely terrible!" Thicketclaw teased.

"Yes, I'm well aware. Your apprentice informed me this morning," Speckledthorn said.

"Oh did she? Well, you know it's all good fun," Thicketclaw said, grabbing a squirrel.

"Of course," Speckledthorn agreed, grabbing one of her birds for himself before following her to a more secluded part of the camp. "And besides, last I checked, I could still whip you in a fight," he added, licking the feathers off the bird's breast.

"Last you checked, we were apprentices and you only agreed to do it because Darkflower made you!" Thicketclaw said defensively.

Speckledthorn shrugged. "I still beat you."

"Barely," Thicketclaw scoffed. "And I bet you couldn't do it again."

"You'll never know, will you?" Speckledthorn replied. He flinched when Thicketclaw swatted his ear but went on eating his meal calmly.

"How do you manage to teach Stormpaw to fight if you're such a pacifist?" Thicketclaw asked.

"I'm not a pacifist. Sparring with Stormpaw has a purpose whereas sparring with you hasn't," Speckledthorn explained.

"What about honing your skills? We might get attacked one day and you'll be a sitting duck because the last cat you fought was an apprentice."

"A talented apprentice."

"An apprentice no less!"

"Very well, in the event we get attacked, you can protect me."

Thicketclaw swatted Speckledthorn again. "Oh no you don't. If you think I'm going to protect you as though you were my kit…" Her voice trailed off and she looked down at the ground.

Speckledthorn gave her a sympathetic look and placed his paw over hers. He didn't feel guilty. It wasn't really his fault, but he still knew it upset her. And yet, even though he told her she didn't have to, she stayed with him. That must mean she was willing to look past it. Thicketclaw wasn't the type to stay with someone out of pity.

"So what did you and Stormpaw work on today?" Thicketclaw asked quietly.

"Awareness, but I really didn't need to teach her anything," Speckledthorn replied.

"I'm not surprised. Besides, how much awareness do you even have? You step on every twig on the forest floor!" she teased.

"I'm more so that I'm given credit for," Speckledthorn said.

Thicketclaw laughed, forcing herself from her slight sadness. What good did it do her or him? "Yeah, I know. You always were. But I don't know how I'm supposed to teach Wildpaw. That was probably my worst lesson when I was an apprentice!"

"You'll figure it out."

"Still, I wish you'd do it for me," she said.

It was Speckledthorn's turn to give a light chuckle. "No, I don't think I'll be able to."

Thicketclaw looked up at him. "Why not?"

Speckledthorn shrugged. "It's just a feeling. Don't trouble yourself with it. You'll do fine. It's your job, anyway. Your place, not mine."

Thicketclaw gave him a small smile, then looked back at her meal. She didn't feel very hungry.

Speckledthorn gently touched his nose to her forehead. "Eat. Tonight is going to be eventful, I think."

Thicketclaw gave a small shrug and then took a large bite out of the squirrel.

~X~

"I can't believe I became an elder so soon. I'm going to miss everything tonight!" Boulder complained. "Mousepaw, you'll be sure and come straight to me with the news, right?"

"I would, Boulder, but I don't think I'm going tonight," Mousepaw said as he laid down a fresh pad of moss for the gray tom.

"Besides, it probably wouldn't be very necessary. If this news is as big as everyone is treating it, you'll know as soon as they arrive back in camp," Snowpaw said as she busily cleaned Snaketail's nest.

"True, but why wouldn't you two go? You're good apprentices," Boulder said.

Mousepaw shrugged. "Just a hunch. I don't think Blackstar wants to make such a big scene, this time, so he'll probably only take the essential cats and Snowpaw, Wildpaw, and I just aren't it."

"Stormpaw and Clawpaw will probably be going, though. Maybe they could tell you," Snowpaw offered.

"Yes, because I'm sure Stormpaw will be just dying to run over here and have a nice long chat with us," Runningnose chuckled.

"Well, maybe Clawpaw," Snowpaw said.

"I can't believe you are talking about this like it's some exciting event!" Snaketail hissed. "The only exciting thing that could happen tonight is if we get word that the bastard is dead. The least we can hope for is that he never returns. Damn Blackstar for letting the mongrel live."

"Snaketail, I know better than to expect you to stop saying such things, but kindly do not do so in my presence," Mousepaw said not looking up from his work.

"What?" Snaketail hissed.

"Please, refrain from voicing your hatred when I am around. I know I can't make you stop thinking it, but I'm asking you to not make me listen to it. The things you say about him and Blackstar are terrible and I can't understand why you're permitted to get away with them. Stew your thoughts with your bitterness but please do not make me listen to it," Mousepaw said calmly.

"You complain about the things I say about that bastard? Do you know what that monster did? Can you even fathom it?" Snaketail exclaimed.

"I know very well what he did and if I didn't, you recite it often enough for me to learn. He made a mistake," Mousepaw said with continuing calmness.

"A _mistake_! He's a murderous monster! He always has been. He always will be. It's in his forsaken blood! He's worse than even Scourge! The _mistake_ was letting that thing live and not killing it when I had the chance! Oh, and I was so close, too. I could have ended it for that thing the very moment it was placed in my charge. But no, I suckled the little beast like a fool! For that sin I'll never be forgiven and I'll surely end up in the Dark Forest!"

"STOP IT!" roared Mousepaw. His calm demeanor was gone and his amber eyes had grown dark. "Your sins are the pain you dealt upon that kit and upon your clanmates. The fact that you suckled the poor thing at all is a miracle in and of itself. Perhaps you will be sent to the Dark Forest. Not because you allowed this 'monster' to live, but because you created it! Did you ever think of that? No, of course not. You're too wrapped up in your hatred to see it. But hear this Snaketail: I say that none of your sins are unforgivable-though perhaps they should be-because his sins are not unforgivable. That's why he's been given this chance. He has a shot to redeem himself and so purge himself of the evil you helped plant in him. I think you're just jealous that you haven't been given such a chance and likely never will because you don't want it and he did."

Snaketail glared viciously at the apprentice and raised her paw. "You'll learn to respect me, brat!" She brought her paw down.

There was a flash of white and Snowpaw appeared, blocking Snaketail's blow. "And you'll not touch my brother," the white apprentice growled.

"You don't know. You brats had the pleasure of never meeting him. You'll see. If he comes tonight, you'll see. That thing is pure evil. He'll rip us all to shreds and I'll die saying 'I told you so'," Snaketail said.

"You'll die as you lived; angry, bitter, and alone," Mousepaw said flatly, "and it will be entirely your fault."

~X~

The tabby sat at the top of a high hill, overlooking the valley below. He was quiet as his eyes scanned the horizon. He didn't react as a she-cat pressed against his side.

"Come here often?" she asked.

He didn't respond.

"Fine. I already know the answer anyway. You come here all the fucking time. What I can't figure out is why. Do you think gawking will do any good? Do you think it'll magically pull them closer? News flash: it won't. You're accomplishing nothing."

"I know," he said. "You've told me this before."

"Well it was true then, too," she said, pushing away from him. The sun glinted against her well-groomed gray coat. "You really do amazing work," she said, gesturing with her tail to her beautiful fur, "And it feels damn good, too."

"Is that why you insist on constantly messing it up again so that I have to do it over?" he asked.

She pressed against his chest and purred. "Are you complaining?"

"It makes me get terrible fur balls," he said, not looking at her.

"But you don't enjoy it at the time? I could do it for you, sometime. You can discover how good it feels."

He rolled his eyes. "Thank you, but I'm perfectly capable of doing it myself."

Her purr became deeper as she circled him. "So am I."

"Fine, I won't do it anymore."

"Don't be like that."

"Be like what?"

"You're rubbing it in."

"Rubbing what in?"

"You're planning to leave me."

At last, he turned to her. "What makes you so sure about that?" he asked.

"You come up here almost every night," she said, gesturing to his viewing point.

"Perhaps I'm just enjoying the view. It gives me a chance to think away from the others," he suggested.

"Yeah, and maybe that poor, pathetic bastard _wanted_ us to find him today," she snapped sarcastically.

The tabby cringed slightly.

"Oh, sorry. I forgot how squeamish bringing these things up makes you," she said, but she didn't sound very sorry.

"I'm not squeamish and you know it." He sighed, "Don't you ever need a place where you can just think without all of them hassling you?"

"Yes. In fact, I have one. It's called my den. It's a great place for thinking and relieving stress. Want me to show you?" She playfully pushed him a few steps away from the viewpoint.

He glanced over his shoulder, thinking about what lay just beyond down below. He turned his face to the sky. The sun would be setting soon. When he looked down again, she was watching him with expectant eyes.

"Alright, let's do it then," she sighed and walked back down the hill.

He took one last look, then followed her, aware that she was cursing under her breath. Cursing him.

~X~

Snowpaw picked her way through the tall grass. The light was getting dimmer as the sun prepared to set, but she'd become accustomed to seeing at night thanks to her training. The path was difficult to follow, full of thorns and snags. A musty, moldy scent wafted up from the plants, disguising one's scent almost perfectly. She figured not a lot of cats must know about this place, or at least didn't care, because it seemed she was the only one who could be counted on to find the cat that used this place as a hiding area.

She passed through a wreath of thorns that combed uncomfortably close to her skin and finally emerged at the entrance of a small open hollow at the base of a tree. She wriggled through its roots. It had been very dark in the thorn patch, but now it was almost pitch black. She couldn't make anything out and the musky scent still blocked out everything else. Snowpaw didn't like being here. It gave her the sense of being crushed by nothingness and like she might suffocate at any moment. She could never be quite sure she was alone or who exactly was in here. The shorter amount of time spent here, the better.

"Windlegs?" she whispered. She wasn't sure why she whispered, there was no need for it, but she always felt like she could never muster up anything louder in this place. It stole her voice.

"I'm here," came Windlegs's soft voice.

Despite knowing it was coming and recognizing the voice immediately, Snowpaw jumped and her fur fluffed out slightly. "It, uh, it's time. You need to come back to camp," she whispered.

"I know," Windlegs replied.

Snowpaw heard a shuffling and then got an eerie feeling as Windlegs's body brushed past hers without her seeing it. She quickly followed her mentor out, thankful to be free of the crushing darkness.

The sky outside had gotten significantly darker, but it wasn't quite time to go, yet. The two made their way patiently back to camp.

Snowpaw finally plucked up the courage to start a conversation. "Windlegs?"

"Hm?" the white warrior asked, lost in her impenetrable thoughts.

"Why do you spend all your time in that hollow? I mean, you come out to eat, patrol, train me, and sometimes even sleep, but otherwise, you're always in there. Why? You didn't used to be. You used to be kinda normal. But this past moon…" the apprentice trailed off, unsure of what to say.

Windlegs sighed. "I'm sorry, Snowpaw, I haven't been fair to you, and I haven't been a very good mentor recently. I suppose it took some time for the grieving to set in."

"I thought grief got better as time went on," Snowpaw said.

"Only after it's been given a chance to be addressed. But regardless, today is the last time I'll do it. No more," Windlegs said with conviction.

"So you think that tonight-"

"No matter what happens tonight, I'm done with my self-pity. I have a responsibility to be a good mentor to you and I can't let petty things get in the way of that."

Snowpaw pressed her flank affectionately against Windlegs's. "You are a good mentor to me," she purred.

Windlegs purred and pressed her nose to Snowpaw's forehead. A moment later, the two broke apart and walked into the camp.

Upon seeing their arrival, Russetfur called the clan together to announce who would be attending the gathering. Mousepaw had been right. Even though there had been a large crowd before, Blackstar wasn't looking for a repeat performance. The group was average size and the only apprentices to be attending were Stormpaw and Clawpaw. There was a hum of disapproval from those not selected to attend, but no one really spoke up.

Windlegs went over to join Thundertail and Mudriver who were obviously going to attend as well. She was suddenly aware that her heart felt like it was trying to ram its way out of her chest. She swallowed hard in an attempt to make it be still, but it didn't work. She forced a small, awkward smile at the siblings and Thundertail returned it in kind. Mudriver managed to make his eyes look a bit brighter, but the gray tom's fur was limp and dull, a physical manifestation of his worry.

Tigerstripe walked over to Speckledthorn, Clawpaw, Stormpaw, and Thicketclaw. Thicketclaw was trying to explain to Wildpaw that she couldn't just sneak into the gathering and no, she wasn't going to storm in and try to change Blackstar's mind. Wildpaw finally walked off in a huff. Thicketclaw sighed and turned back to Speckledthorn. Speckledthorn smiled at her and she nuzzled her head under his chin. Tigerstripe watched this and realized his friends didn't know, couldn't know, how this simple display of affection tore at his heart. Soon enough, though, Thicketclaw moved away from Speckledthorn and batted the calico on the nose. The apprentices watched this with faint amusement as Speckledthorn remained ever passive under the she-cat's torments.

Blackstar called for those attending the gathering to come together. Those left behind watched the group go.

Blackstar's movements felt robotic to him. He had the sensation of floating and nausea at the same time. Even the warning chill of leaf-fall whispering through the tall grass didn't seem to touch him and he felt over-heated. _'Pull yourself together,'_ he mentally hissed at himself, '_You're acting like a damn kit!'_ He forced a cold breath of air into his lungs and when he exhaled he felt like he was breathing fire. His heart slowed and the numbness faded from his legs, but he could still feel it in his toes. _'Close enough.'_ He lifted his tail high and the clan bolted into the clearing.

ShadowClan arrived at the same time as WindClan. The two clans looked each other over in a tolerant but not exactly friendly way before sitting for the most part separate. Several WindClan warriors were looking over at ShadowClan and then turning to whisper amongst themselves. Yes, they knew what tonight was. ThunderClan arrived a bit later followed by RiverClan. Time to get things started.

Mudriver could feel his heart beating in his chest and hear the blood roaring in his ears. Firestar spoke first. The ginger tom was a blur. Mudriver didn't realize until Thundertail tapped him on the shoulder that he was digging his claws into the soil. He quickly sheathed them and glanced up to meet Windlegs's empathetic gaze. No doubt she felt the same churning fire in her gut.

Speckledthorn watched in quiet fascination. Surely he wasn't the only cat here paying more attention to the surroundings than to the leaders. Ah, of course he wasn't. There were a few actually looking around-checking out ShadowClan to see if they were hiding someone. No, no one hiding. Just as much a mystery to ShadowClan as to the others. Tallstar stepped down. Two down. Two to go.

Tigerstripe's ears pricked forward. Leopardstar speaking about the kits; healthy, happy, well taken care of, well fed still, and soon to become fine apprentices. Yes, this was what he wanted and needed to hear. The rest of the night be damned. He was satisfied. And soon, probably, very soon, he could see them. Speak to them, maybe. What were they like? Who did they look like? Leopardstar stepped back, Tigerstripe was still lost in his thoughts. Dawnlegs would return to the gatherings soon as well. Yes, his beautiful Dawnlegs. A pang of sadness struck him as he remembered that they would have to keep their distance. But it would be worth it to keep their kits safe and happy and normal.

Leopardstar stepped back. One leader left to go. Blackstar struggled to keep his heart from pounding once more. He had to look calm and confident. The outcome of this night didn't matter. ShadowClan were strong no matter what. StarClan help him that he did not look the way he felt! Was he speaking too fast? Should he slow down? Deep breaths. Was he even making sense? It was hard to hear himself over the roaring in his ears. Deep breaths. Remain calm.

Then his report was over. Done. No more to tell. No more for anyone to tell. He scanned the crowd. No new arrivals. That was it. The feeling came over him again. Old, yet familiar. Dirty. Horribly dirty. With his heart slowly picking up its pace in his chest, Blackstar prepared to leap down from the rock and end this once and for all.

Then came the rustling. All heads turned toward the back of the clearing. The bushes hissed and shook as something pushed them aside. A tabby paw stepped into the moonlight. Then another. A handsome silver and black head poked through followed by a sleek silver and black body. Watching it emerge was fascinating. The rippling pelt gave the effect that the creature was tugging itself loose from the shadows it had once been a part of. A striped tail whipped itself out to follow the muscular body and the figure was at last free. Piercing blue eyes focused directly on the white tom crouched on the great rock.

Nobody moved. Nobody made a sound. The stillness was deafening. Then, a single whisper cut through the silence, carried by the faint breeze.

"Darkshadow…"


	34. Chapter 33

**You know how I said I was looking forward to my new challenges? I lied. They suck! Haha, no it's just that after moving out and now going to college coupled with many new chores I have to do leave me with very little time for this story. But, just for you guys, I'm dishing this out and I'm going to keep working hard. Enjoy.**

"_Darkshadow."_

The tabby walked toward the great rock and the crowd parted for him. The black tip of his tail waved like a banner behind him. He was not the scrawny kit he'd been when he'd left. He was still thin, but muscles rippled beneath the striped fur. His legs and body were longer, sleek, and strong. Silvery-pink scars flashed with every pawstep he took only to disappear again amidst the thick fur. His silver coloring had grown lighter, bleached by the new leaf and green leaf sun so that it was almost luminescent in the moonlight. The black stripes had grown darker, bolder; thick slashes across his coat like some deep river spilling down his back- cracks in the moon's surface. His perfect, white whiskers curled down elegantly at the tips and quivered slightly in the breeze.

The scar on his muzzle was longer and seemed to be stretching itself lazily across his face, but it was a striking feature as was a tiny white scar down the middle of his black nose. His right ear was in three uneven pieces that all stood tall and proud while his left ear miraculously appeared the example of perfection. On his right shoulder there was a frightening scar that appeared to be the result of someone ripping the flesh away so only a thin film of scarred black and gray flesh remained. His left shoulder bore a fresh wound that would likely result in a similar scar.

And then there were his eyes. Those piercing, pale, icy blue eyes. They never changed. Not since he was a kit. Their color was always that terrifying blue that froze anything they were fixed upon. Only the light behind them changed. Only what lay behind them gave any clue that this cat was the same that had left this clearing half a year prior. And right now, those chilled orbs were locked onto Blackstar.

Blackstar's heart wasn't pounding anymore. It had come to a dead stop and felt like it was trying to slither down into his stomach, but he forced it back up and sent it a mental jolt so it would beat normally again. He cursed his foolishness silently once again.

The tabby's walk was calm and steady, though marred by a subtle limp. He held himself proudly. No longer was he trying to avoid the gazes of the other cats. He stole the atmosphere of the clearing and wrapped it around himself. He finally completed his walk down the centre of the clearing and came to a stop at the front of the crowd, still staring up at the white leader, not even sparing a glance at the others. The wound on his shoulder was still bleeding. A few thick drops of ruby blood slithered down his leg and soaked into the ground to mix with the rest.

His expression until now had been blank and unreadable, but now a crooked, toothy smirk slithered across the right half of his face. His white fangs stood out starkly against black gums. When he spoke, his voice was deeper than before, more mature, but there was still that ring to it. That ring which could chill a cat to the bone that he had possessed since he was only a tiny kit. Yes, it was impossible to mistake it. This was the same tabby.

"What's the matter, Blackstar? Scared?" he asked.

Blackstar's expression was calm and hard. "Never," he replied.

The tabby chuckled, a mildly unnatural sound. "Of course." He turned to address the crowd. "Sorry I'm late. I had some business to attend to and I may have miscalculated exactly how it would affect my travel." He glanced at the oozing blood on his shoulder as it matted his otherwise perfect fur. "But no matter, it appears I got here just in time." He turned back to face the great rock. "Blackstar, I do believe you owe me something."

Blackstar nodded. "Indeed I do. I told you that if you returned to this place six moons after I cast you out, you would be accepted back into ShadowClan as my warrior and so receive your warrior name. Your presence here tonight fulfills your part of that bargain and so I shall fulfill mine.

"Hear me, cats of all clans. This tabby is a warrior of ShadowClan and from this moment forth, he shall be known as Darkshadow. May StarClan bless him on his journey," Blackstar finished, looking fearlessly into the new warrior's eyes.

Darkshadow's smirk turned into a wide, crooked grin and he spun back around to face the others proudly. To his surprise, there was a gray warrior standing directly in front of him.

Mudriver leaned forward and tapped his nose against the tabby's. "Darkshadow," he said quietly and then repeated it slowly.

Thundertail and Windlegs joined in the slow chant, repeating the name with each heartbeat. A few other warriors around the clearing chorused in as well and Blackstar's deep voice boomed down from above. The word began to fall easily from everyone's lips, but there was still an air of tension and they could all feel it. But its crushing weight seemed less great for the time being.

Darkshadow's eyes fell upon the two ShadowClan apprentices in attendance. Only one of them was chanting, the other had him steadily fixed in her own deep gaze. He nodded to them.

A set of heavy, black paws landed on the ground and the chanting stopped. Blackstar looked down at his new warrior and then out to the crowd. "ShadowClan, let's go," he called. Blackstar looked down at Darkshadow and nodded before trotting into the trees, Darkshadow keeping pace beside him and the rest of ShadowClan falling in behind.

Windlegs, Mudriver, and Thundertail followed directly behind the two toms. Littlecloud and Russetfur flanked them to the sides.

Tigerstripe, Speckledthorn, and Thicketclaw brought up the rear. Tigerstripe remembered a time when he would have been walking in the middle next to Thicketclaw, but things had since changed and he really didn't care. Even the return of Darkshadow had not shaken him from his thoughts back to RiverClan. His lack of interest in the ShadowClan affair surprised even him. He glanced to the side and swore he caught a glimpse of Speckledthorn's green eyes before the calico faced forward again. It sent a small chill down his spine and reminded him of his conversation with Clawpaw earlier.

It was no surprise that everyone who had been left back at camp was wide awake when the gathering party returned. After Blackstar entered, they saw just what the others had seen as Darkshadow slipped into the camp.

Blackstar leapt into the branches of the meeting tree, but he didn't need to call the clan together. Many pairs of eyes looked up at him expectantly. "As you can see, Darkshadow has returned, and of course that means he is a ShadowClan warrior with full duties. But first, Darkshadow, you must guard the camp alone tonight. You know the rules. This is a silent vigil," he said calmly. He finally felt back in complete control.

A few murmurs rose amongst the cats before Tigerstripe spoke up. "Um, Blackstar, I don't mean to show mistrust in Darkshadow or your judgment-"

"Since when?" Blackstar interrupted.

Tigerstripe sighed before continuing on. "Are you sure you want to entrust him with the duty of guarding the camp so soon after his return?"

"Yes, I'm sure. Everyone has to do it before they become a full warrior and I promised Darkshadow I'd make it official the very night he returned, therefore he will be guarding the camp tonight," Blackstar said.

"Of course you're a cat of your word, Blackstar, and we all respect you for it, but I, too, can see Tigerstripe's point," Russetfur said.

"Fine, Russetfur, now see mine. I'm aware that you all are apprehensive about Darkshadow and I don't blame you. You have a right to it. We all know what he's done, but I trust him and I hope you all learn to as well. I don't expect it to happen overnight, but maybe tonight could be a step in the right direction," Blackstar said.

Snaketail's voice rasped from the back, "Or maybe he'll murder us all in our sleep and it won't matter how we feel about him."

Darkshadow visibly tensed, but didn't look back at the old she-cat with the rest of the clan.

Blackstar sighed in annoyance, "Snaketail, your input really isn't needed right now."

"Oh? And why not? I'm just outlining the possibilities that you seem to ignore," Snaketail said.

"Fine, believe what you want, but Darkshadow is guarding the camp tonight alone and none of you will change my mind. Now, go back to your respective dens. Littlecloud, please do what you can about Darkshadow's wound before he begins his vigil," Blackstar said and then jumped down.

The crowd slowly dispersed.

"I'm not turning my back on him is all I'm saying!" Snaketail shouted.

Darkshadow closed his eyes and took a deep breath. When he opened them again, he saw Mudriver, Thundertail, and Windlegs all looking at him. He grinned at them and gave them a little nod before walking with Littlecloud into the medicine cat's den.

~X~

"So that's Darkshadow," Snowpaw whispered, laying in her nest in the apprentices' den. "I didn't know he'd be so big."

"He didn't used to be. He used to be quite scrawny. Not much to look at, at all," Clawpaw said.

"Hmph, I could take him," Wildpaw snorted.

"Now, Wildpaw, don't you dare go causing trouble for Darkshadow," Mousepaw warned.

Wildpaw looked at him innocently. "Me? Cause trouble?"

"I mean it! He has enough to deal with as it is. He doesn't need you tormenting him and trying to coax him into a fight. He might not be as passive as Speckledthorn. And if he does give in, that won't look good for him," Mousepaw said.

"What are you saying? That he'll hurt me?" Wildpaw scoffed.

"Not intentionally, no, but he's bigger and stronger than you are. Not to mention he's obviously a better fighter."

"So you're questioning my fighting skills." Wildpaw let out a small growl.

Mousepaw rolled his eyes and sighed, "I'm just saying you don't know what you could be getting yourself into with him. Just leave him be, alright? This is his chance for redemption and if you ruin it for him, I'll never forgive you."

Wildpaw fell silent for a moment. "I never thought of it that way," she said finally.

"I know you didn't. That's why I'm here to do it for you," Mousepaw replied.

"Enough about Darkshadow, we can get to know him later. What about Speckledthorn and Thicketclaw? How are they doing?" Snowpaw asked conspiratorially.

"Oh, you know. Same old, same old. She devils him, and he pretends he doesn't love it," Wildpaw said.

"Do you suppose they'll have kits?" Snowpaw asked.

"They better not! At least, not while I'm still an apprentice. I need Thicketclaw to mentor me," Wildpaw said.

"StarClan knows no one else should have to suffer that responsibility," Mousepaw mumbled.

"Hey!" Wildpaw hissed and her siblings giggled.

"I don't think you need to worry about them having kits, Wildpaw," Clawpaw said.

"Huh? Why?" Snowpaw asked, sounding a bit disappointed.

"Well, because, Speckledthorn is a calico tom," Clawpaw said. Seeing the confusion on the other apprentices' faces, he elaborated, "Calico toms are very rare and when they are born, they're typically sterile."

"Sterile?" Wildpaw asked.

"They can't have kits," Mousepaw explained.

"Oh…" Snowpaw looked at the ground. "But Thicketclaw told me once that she really wants kits."

"Well, she obviously wants Speckledthorn more," Mousepaw said.

"And I can't say I blame her," Wildpaw said with a wide grin, "What about you, Stormpaw? He is _your_ mentor after all." She raised her eyebrows suggestively.

Stormpaw grinned, then, laid her head down on her paws.

Wildpaw laughed, "Of course, _she'll_ never tell."

The other apprentices laughed and at last said their 'good night's.

Clawpaw looked down at Stormpaw curled against his side. He whispered, "A tom captures your thoughts, doesn't he? But it isn't Speckledthorn. You haven't seen him for so long. You're glad he's returned, aren't you?...Yes, I can sense your sadness. I am sorry for you…Of course, things must run their course. Still, I wish it could be different for you." He smiled. "Ah, you, ever the optimist. I'll never see as much as you do…No, it's true and I accept it. One of us has to speak for the other…Yes, he is quite fascinating. And he managed to make you talk for the short time you did. His absence made you quiet even to me…Don't apologize. I understand.

"But Speckledthorn is quite the tom, isn't he?" A sad expression fell across Clawpaw's face. "I know. It pains me to know, but I do…Please, tell me no more. I can sense that it is painful for you as well…No, no, of course I won't tell. I don't know when to expect it anyway…Then, you'll just have to make every moment with him count. We both will." He gently licked Stormpaw's forehead. "Sleep now, sister, even we cannot see everything and it will only destroy our energy to try." He grinned. "Thank you."

~X~

Darkshadow sat quietly staring out at the dark forest beyond the camp. He'd missed the scattered trees and thick, tall grass. Even the briars were a refreshing sight. The soft forest air was a welcome change from the sharp, toxic scents he'd endured for the past half-year.

The forest was quiet. Darkshadow wasn't surprised. It was unlikely any clans would feel the need to attack. Even less likely given that it was a gathering night. It was clever, really. ShadowClan wouldn't feel threatened by the other clans tonight so they wouldn't much care who was on guard. Darkshadow had just made his journey and was injured so he wouldn't pose much of a threat. And the night would be over in just a few hours. Blackstar had chosen the perfect night for Darkshadow to stand vigil and wrapped it all in the reasoning that it was required to make the ceremony official. Darkshadow grinned. Blackstar was clever, indeed.

The silence around him felt slightly oppressing. It had been six moons since he'd heard silence this pure. It made him feel on edge. The closest he'd come to feeling so isolated was when that dog had attacked.

Violent images of a massacre plagued Darkshadow's mind. He closed his eyes and shook them away. Muted screams faded in his ears.

'_Might as well get used to it. You'll be suffering it for the rest of your life,'_ Darkstripe hissed in Darkshadow's mind. Darkshadow didn't respond and so Darkstripe continued. _'What did you think? That you'd come back here and get a fancy new name and get the girl and everything would be sunshine and rainbows? Meanwhile, all those scary monsters were just gonna fade away into the background, never to haunt you again. Well I've got news for you, kitten: This is where your monsters came from. All you did by coming back here was bring them home.'_ Darkshadow still didn't respond and Darkstripe grew annoyed. _'So, what, this fresh start of yours means you're not talking to me anymore? You're gonna ignore me until I get bored and go away? I've got nowhere to go, dumbass!'_

Darkshadow mentally sighed. _'It's a silent vigil,'_ he said in his mind. _'Key word: silent.'_

'_You're actually gonna do that? That's a laugh! Why? So 'StarClan' don't get angry? Don't tell me you're gonna fall into that ancestor-worshipping shit again. I thought you were over that idiocy. What did those so-called 'ancestors' do for you ever, huh? Nothing! Not a damn thing! Just sat on their sparkly asses and watched like they've always done and always will do. What good have they ever done anybody?'_ Darkstripe jeered.

'_I'm not going to worship StarClan,' _Darkshadow said, _'but you shouldn't talk about them that way. The forest clans do worship StarClan and if I'm going to assimilate myself back into the society I have to make them think I believe as they do, or at least respect their views. If they want to worship their ancestors, leave them to it.'_

'_Even though we know the truth?'_ Darkstripe asked.

'_There are many truths. The clans have theirs.'_

'_We have ours. And I happen to like ours a Hell of a lot more so you can be all noble and 'respect the views of others', but I'm gonna stick with logic.'_

'_Who said our Conversion was logical? I still think it was slightly insane! And who said belief in StarClan is illogical? They do exist, we have personal proof of that. And they have made contributions to the future of the forest through their prophecies.'_

Darkstripe snorted. _'Prophecies that don't make a shit of sense until it's almost too late to actually use the knowledge. Why can't they just be straight forward in their meaning? And if we have some grand destiny, why isn't there some cryptic message about that, huh?'_

'_It's my destiny and maybe because they knew I'd deviate,' _Darkshadow said with a mental shrug.

'_You greedy bastard, always trying to take the spotlight for yourself. There's two of us here whether you like it or not.'_

'_I'm greedy? You tried to steal my body!'_

'_Once! That was one time. Sheesh, I thought you'd gotten over that little drama.'_

' '_Little drama'? You almost drove me insane!…er!'_

'_Well at least _I_ wouldn't have gotten us almost killed!'_

'_Shut up and leave me alone,' _Darkshadow hissed. He felt a slight relief as Darkstripe was locked away in his cage. One good thing that had come out of his exile and Conversion was learning how to do that. Left alone to his thoughts at last, Darkshadow wondered if this was the real reason he'd always been caught in Limbo and never allowed to enter StarClan when meeting with his adoptive brother and father. Did whatever hidden knowledge StarClan possessed know that Darkshadow would never belong there? He'd probably never know.

Darkshadow sighed. His argument with Darkstripe had taken less than an hour. There were still several to go, but, as entertaining as it could be, Darkshadow had no desire to release Darkstripe from his cage any time soon.

His shoulder throbbed. It pulsed with his heartbeat and he could occasionally feel little splashes of blood spilling out to wet the cobwebs. He wished he could have taken poppy seeds, but that would have made him drowsy and been counterproductive to the vigil. The pain gnawed at him and made it hard to focus, but he knew it would pass. It was just the vicious rebellion of the germs being terminated under Littlecloud's careful antibiotics. The wound wasn't as bad as it appeared- it didn't have to be to produce its effect. He glanced over at his scarred shoulder. He nostalgically remembered a time when his pelt was perfect and untouched by claws, flesh untorn. Until he'd willingly given up his perfection to stop a war. And then his exile granted the harsh world six moons to riddle his body with scars. But even so, his pelt was still less damaged than most he'd seen.

He smirked. All that Snaketail had ever done to him was nothing compared to what had happened to him in the past half year. Beatings and tortures and humiliation; Darkshadow had endured it all and more. Things even Snaketail would find cruel. And yet, he'd rather go back out into exile for another six moons than relive his days in the nursery. He couldn't explain why. He knew it was foolish, but something about the past gripped him with dread. Perhaps there were underlying factors that he'd been too young to realize. He didn't know. Even the Conversion had yet to give him any answers.

Darkshadow looked over at the nursery, standing dark and empty now. Sounds faded, but never disappeared completely. He wondered, if he concentrated very hard, he could hear the phantom cries from his kithood. But then, if he could hear those, even dimly, more recent cries from his adolescence would be enough to deafen him. He shook his head again in frustration. The memories stressed him and it was difficult to keep Darkstripe's cage locked when he was too stressed and he wasn't in the mood for his alter ego's smartass comments.

He fixed his gaze back out into the deep abyss of the forest. Shadows engulfed him, congratulating him on his name, acknowledging their kinship with him. They'd waited a long time for his return and now their prodigal son had returned. He closed his eyes and thought he could almost feel the darkness caress him.

~X~

The sun slowly began to rise, spilling its light over the territory and shrinking the shadows. All the shadows, that is, but one; a silver and black tabby sitting at the ShadowClan entrance.

The dawn patrol began to gather, ignoring Darkshadow for the most part, although a few of them glanced his way. Littlecloud appeared from his den and trotted over to the new warrior.

"Darkshadow, your vigil is over. Would you please accompany me back to my den? I'd like to replace the bandage on that wound of yours and maybe get a better look at it," Littlecloud requested.

Darkshadow nodded his consent and followed Littlecloud to his den where Littlecloud carefully removed the cobweb and leaf bandage from his shoulder. The cobwebs were soaked, but the bleeding seemed to have stopped for the most part.

Littlecloud clicked his tongue and shook his head as he peered at the gaping hole in Darkshadow's pelt. "What in StarClan's name did this to you?" he asked.

Darkshadow grinned and snapped his jaws together. "Rough life till the very end out there," he said.

"Apparently," Littlecloud muttered, using some wet moss to sponge up the blood still left in the wound. Darkshadow hardly flinched. "It would appear this has happened before," he said, referring to the scar on Darkshadow's other shoulder.

"One to get in, one to get out," Darkshadow said.

Littlecloud gave him a look of confusion. "I'm afraid I don't follow."

Darkshadow shrugged. "I don't think you want to and to tell the truth, I don't much want to talk about it. Although I will say, I didn't have such exquisite care for the other one. I had to do it myself."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I'd never been gladder that Blackstar made me be your apprentice for a day." Darkshadow grinned.

"Glad I could help. Well, that's about all I can do. Just keep it clean and come to me if you're having any problems. If all goes well, you should be able to remove the bandages soon," Littlecloud said after securing a fresh bandage. "I'll replace it again tonight. Now I think Blackstar wanted to see you so you'd better go find him."

"Will do. Thanks, Littlecloud. Your help is much appreciated," Darkshadow said, flexing his leg to see how it moved in the new wrapping.

"Anytime, although it would be nice if this didn't happen too often," Littlecloud said.

"I'll see what I can do." With that, Darkshadow left.

He caught sight of Blackstar immediately. Blackstar was sitting with Russetfur near the camp entrance. Speckledthorn and Tigerstripe were approaching the leader and deputy with Clawpaw and Stormpaw in tow. Intrigued, Darkshadow quickened his pace slightly.

"What are you doing here?" Russetfur asked when Darkshadow approached.

"I thought it would be good if we evaluated Darkshadow here with Stormpaw and Clawpaw," Blackstar explained.

"Now? He just got off an all night vigil," Russetfur protested.

"Oh, that's alright," Darkshadow said, "I got plenty of rest yesterday. Really, I'm not tired."

"And what of your injury?" Speckledthorn asked.

Darkshadow stretched his left leg. "I've had worse and it's not as bad as it looks. I'll be fine."

Speckledthorn frowned, but shrugged.

"Well fine then, unless Blackstar has anymore surprises, let's go," Russetfur said. Blackstar dipped his head and allowed the ginger she-cat to lead the way out of the camp.

Darkshadow hung toward the back. Tigerstripe, Clawpaw, and Stormpaw were ahead of him. Speckledthorn slowed slightly so he could keep pace beside him.

"So you ended up with Stormpaw as your apprentice, hm? Didn't see that one coming," Darkshadow said.

"Neither did I. I was as shocked as everyone else when Blackstar announced it," Speckledthorn said.

"I don't suppose she's become anymore of a conversationalist?" Darkshadow asked.

Speckledthorn smiled. "Not in the conventional sense, no."

"Well then, I guess it's a good thing that nothing about you is conventional, isn't it?"

"Training her has been…fascinating. I doubt I'll have another apprentice after her, though."

"Why so? I'm sure you did a fine job."

"Well I think so, too. She passed all her evaluations brilliantly. I just don't think I'll have a chance at another." Speckledthorn shrugged.

"Well, perhaps Blackstar wanted you to have at least one so that, should anything happen to Russetfur, you'll be next in line as deputy, hm? Take mother's place," Darkshadow offered, nudging Speckledthorn with his uninjured shoulder.

Speckledthorn smiled. "I doubt it, but maybe. After all," he looked up at the sky, "none of us knows the future for certain, right?"

Darkshadow didn't have a chance to answer as the group came to a halt at the familiar tree near the dump. "Brings back memories, eh, Tigerstripe?" Darkshadow said. Tigerstripe hardly gave him a glance.

"Ok, then. Who's first?" Blackstar asked.

"I'll go first!" Clawpaw chimed in.

"Very well. Stormpaw can go next and we'll end with Darkshadow," Blackstar said.

"Works for me," Russetfur murmured.

The rest of the cats stepped back to allow for room as the deputy and apprentice dropped into a crouch. With claws sheathed, they went at each other. Clawpaw was strong, much like his mentor, but Russetfur was quick and heavier than she looked. Clawpaw couldn't overpower her with strength and it seemed he'd be beaten quickly, but he suddenly shifted strategies and worked to outsmart Russetfur. It seemed to be working. The apprentice was dodging and getting a few good hits in, but if Darkshadow's memory served right, no one outsmarted Russetfur for long. She suddenly caught hold of Clawpaw's hind leg and ripped him out of the middle of a high jump over her head. Clawpaw gave a grunt as he was slammed to the ground, hard. Russetfur was suddenly upon him, but he used his strong hind legs to shove her off. He struggled to get to his paws quickly, not paying enough attention to Russetfur. Russetfur sprang off the trunk of the tree and launched herself back at the apprentice. She caught him round the shoulder with one paw and sank her teeth into his scruff, forcing him to the ground. Russetfur released Clawpaw and backed off. Clawpaw got up and trotted over to Tigerstripe with a small smile on his face.

"Next," Russetfur called, not even pausing to brush off her pelt.

Stormpaw glanced at Speckledthorn then trotted forward.

"Are you ready?" Russetfur asked.

Stormpaw blinked.

Russetfur sighed, "Right," and dropped into a ready crouch.

Stormpaw made the first move, dashing in to meet Russetfur head-on. Darkshadow was surprised. This was the same mistake he'd made when he'd tested with Russetfur. Surely Speckledthorn would have taught her not to do that. Darkshadow glanced at the calico tom, but Speckledthorn was watching his apprentice calmly.

Apparently Russetfur was surprised as well, but she recovered quickly and prepared to block Stormpaw's blow. But Stormpaw didn't strike. She crouched down and slipped between Russetfur's front legs. Stormpaw threw her weight upward against Russetfur's belly, knocking the ginger she-cat off her paws. Russetfur stumbled but couldn't regain her footing before gravity did its work. Stormpaw didn't move to pin her down. She attacked from the side and bit into Russetfur's chest where her defenses were weaker. Russetfur hissed and managed to swing her hind legs around and caught Stormpaw under her throat, shoving the apprentice away and temporarily crushing her windpipe. Stormpaw backed off, coughing. Russetfur was upon her in a second. The two tussled. Stormpaw was large for her age, but Russetfur was still bigger and forced the gray she-cat to the ground quickly. Stormpaw struggled in Russetfur's grip and barely managed to roll onto her back before Russetfur could deliver a 'killing blow'. Stormpaw forced her hind legs up and tried to shove Russetfur away. Russetfur didn't budge backward, but she couldn't move forward either. Russetfur jumped high into the air. Stormpaw's hind paws shot into the air as well, carried by the pressure she'd been exerting on Russetfur. Everything except Stormpaw's head and shoulders were in the air. As the lower portion of the apprentice's body came crashing back to the ground, so did Russetfur and the deputy gently sank her fangs into Stormpaw's throat before backing off.

"Not bad, apprentice," Russetfur said, scratching her ear. "Not very many cats as young as you could hold me in a stalemate. You've had good training." Her eyes flashed over to Speckledthorn briefly and she caught a small twinkle in the tom's eye at her subtle compliment. She sighed. "Alright, Darkshadow, let's-"

"Actually, I think I'd like to handle Darkshadow," Blackstar interrupted.

Russetfur gave him a questioning look, then shrugged and stepped out of the way.

Darkshadow faced the leader. He dipped his head respectfully and dropped into an almost lazy crouch, favoring his right leg and placing almost no pressure on the left. Blackstar did not crouch and Darkshadow found this interesting.

The tabby sprang high into the air, higher than Russetfur had, and angled a sharp decent straight at Blackstar. Blackstar waited, then leapt into the air and met Darkshadow in his downward arc. He grabbed the tabby's shoulders and threw him to the ground beneath him. Darkshadow grunted as his back collided with the hard ground, but a small smirk flitted across his face. He twisted and grabbed one of Blackstar's front legs in his mouth, then rolled over onto his paws. Blackstar hissed as his paws were pulled out from under him, but he yanked his leg free and rolled over Darkshadow's back and back onto his paws. Before Darkshadow could respond, Blackstar wrapped his front legs around Darkshadow's chest and forced the tabby into a roll. Blackstar slammed Darkshadow against the tree, pinning the tabby's chest against the rough bark. Darkshadow's hind legs scrabbled until he could finally dig his claws into the bark and wrenched his body free then flipped himself up onto Blackstar's back. Blackstar rolled, crushing Darkshadow beneath him before the tabby could spring away. Darkshadow was winded. Blackstar pinned him down again.

Darkshadow tried to dig his hind legs into Blackstar's belly, but Blackstar leaned down and caught Darkshadow's left hind leg in his jaws. Darkshadow hissed as Blackstar yanked hard on his leg. He tried to lean up so he could bat at Blackstar's head with his front paws, but Blackstar moved. The leader bit into the left side of Darkshadow's neck and placed a heavy paw on Darkshadow's right shoulder. There was a soft crack.

Darkshadow's eyes and mouth were wide open in surprise. He didn't move. Any more pressure and he knew Blackstar could easily snap his neck. After a few seconds, Blackstar released him. Before Darkshadow could relax, Blackstar grabbed his scruff and lifted slightly, then dropped him back to the ground. Darkshadow gave a soft grunt, but then stared up at Blackstar, this time completely shocked.

Blackstar stared back at the tabby, a hard look in his eyes. The message was clear. _I know your tricks. You can't beat me. You are under my rule._

Darkshadow nodded silent understanding. Blackstar straightened up and addressed Russetfur and the others. Darkshadow knew that it wasn't that Blackstar was mistrustful of him. Blackstar was just cautious and rightfully so. Darkshadow had done enough wrongs to lose all of the leader's trust as well as the clan's, but Blackstar was giving him another chance. But if he blew it this time, that was it. Blackstar wouldn't be so forgiving a second time.

Stormpaw and Clawpaw were released for their hunting exam. Darkshadow was exempt from this portion. Hunting had always been his specialty and, considering that he'd spent six moons on his own and was not in the least bit emaciated, it obviously still was. Tigerstripe returned to camp, but Darkshadow chose to stay out and hunt anyway and granted Speckledthorn permission to join him.

~X~

Wildpaw paced back and forth in front of the apprentices' den. She leapt up onto the stump, laid down, stood, then jumped off again and resumed pacing.

"I'm so bored!" she shouted finally.

"Really? I hadn't noticed," Snowpaw said, grooming herself calmly.

"I hate getting days off! There's nothing to do in camp!" Wildpaw hissed.

"So leave camp," Snowpaw suggested without thinking.

Wildpaw was about to snap at her again when a thought occurred to her. She grinned impishly. "That's a great idea."

"Uh-oh," Snowpaw said, seeing the look on her sister's face. "Wildpaw, what are you thinking?"

"Nothing you have to worry about. I'll see you later," the other apprentice said and began heading for the exit.

"Oh no you don't. You're gonna do something to get yourself in trouble," Snowpaw said, following her.

"I am not," Wildpaw said.

"Yes you are and you'd better not. I'll tell someone," Snowpaw threatened emptily.

Wildpaw rolled her eyes. "Yeah, why don't you go back to the nursery while you're at it? What exactly do you plan to say, hm?"

"That you left the camp under suspicious circumstances."

"Suspicious circumstances? I'm just going to have a little fun."

"_Highly_ suspicious circumstances."

Wildpaw rolled her eyes again. "Yeah, that'll convince them for sure."

Snowpaw let out a sigh of defeat. "Fine, but I'm coming with you anyway."

"Fine. I just hope you aren't considered 'suspicious' by association." Wildpaw laughed.

The farther they got from camp, the more uncomfortable Snowpaw became. "Wildpaw, what are we doing?"

"Walking."

"Where?"

"In ShadowClan territory, dummy."

"Where are we going in ShadowClan territory?"

"Somewhere else in ShadowClan territory."

"Where exactly in ShadowClan territory?"

"It's a surprise."

"I don't like surprises."

"You could go back."

Snowpaw sighed. "Well, what are we gonna do?"

"Things."

"Dangerous things?"

"That depends on your definition of 'dangerous'."

"Wildpaw, I don't like this."

"You're such a kit. Like I said: You don't have to come."

Snowpaw was quiet. A few minutes later, the fence around the two-leg dump came into view. Snowpaw's anxiety spiked. "Wildpaw, we aren't going there, are we?"

"Yes," Wildpaw said simply.

"Why? We aren't allowed! It's dangerous," Snowpaw protested.

"We aren't going _in_. I just want to see something."

"See what?"

"A rat."

"Why would you want to see a rat?"

"Because, they're supposed to be soooo dangerous and scary, I want to see for myself." Wildpaw fearlessly trotted up to the fence.

Snowpaw followed uncomfortably.

"Do you see anything?" Wildpaw asked, squinting in an attempt to see into dark crevices.

"No rats," Snowpaw said, eyes darting around toward any movement. "Maybe they aren't home today. We can try again some other time."

"Stop being such a wimp!" Wildpaw chided.

"But Wildpaw-"

"Shh! Shut up! I think I saw something," Wildpaw whispered, crouching down to see under a small hole at the bottom of the fence.

"Wildpaw, I have a bad feeling about this. Let's just go hunting or something," Snowpaw suggested.

"Oh, go then! I'm staying here," Wildpaw whispered harshly.

"Wildpaw, come on!" Snowpaw urged and tried to pull her sister away.

"Leave me alone, Snowpaw! Just because you're afraid of your own shadow doesn't mean I am," Wildpaw snapped. "If you're so afraid, go back to camp!"

"Come with me. We can see a rat another time." Snowpaw became more insistent, trying harder to move Wildpaw away from the fence.

Wildpaw tried to shove Snowpaw away and the two ended up tussling.

"You can't tell me what to do!" Wildpaw hissed. Suddenly, the ground beneath her paws wasn't there anymore. The earth was weak where she'd been standing and had fallen away, dragging her down with it under the fence. Wildpaw cried out in surprise and tumbled into the piles of trash.

"Wildpaw!" Snowpaw cried, standing at the edge of a gaping hole beneath the fence.

"I'm ok," Wildpaw called, standing and shaking herself. She glanced around. "I don't see any-"

"Look out!" Snowpaw shouted.

Wildpaw spun away from the rat just in time. "Uh-oh," she said as thick, dark bodies began creeping out of the shadows. Some were as big as she was, most were smaller, but they were all frightening.

"Wildpaw, I'm coming!" Snowpaw said. She began to work her way under the fence, but a large rat suddenly appeared in front of her. It hissed, flashing its huge teeth. Snowpaw screamed and backed up as the rat snapped at her.

"Snowpaw!" Wildpaw begged. Rats had surrounded her and were taking turns rushing in and snapping at her. She jumped and dodged. She wanted to attack but there were too many. She wanted to run, but they had her blocked in. "Snowpaw, help me!"

"I will!" Snowpaw promised. Despite her insides screaming at her not to, Snowpaw spun around and ran from the fence back toward the camp, leaving her sister behind.

~X~

"So, aren't you gonna ask me?" Darkshadow asked. He and Speckledthorn had been hunting for a while now in near silence.

"Ask you what?" Speckledthorn asked.

"About what it was like while I was gone. I assumed that's why you wanted to come hunting with me."

Speckledthorn shook his head. "That's not why. I mean, you can tell me if you want, but I'm fine if you don't."

"So why did you come with me? I figure I'm still a pariah. Not a great thing for someone to be seen wandering around with."

Speckledthorn shrugged. "I'm not worried about what the clan thinks. They'll understand the truth about you eventually. I just regret that I never really took the time to get to know you."

"We've been over this. You're Tigerstripe's friend. He wouldn't want you anywhere near me."

Speckledthorn shook his head again. "Windlegs is Tigerstripe's sister, but she didn't let him dictate her. Tigerstripe is my friend, but I was wrong to allow him such complete control over my life and I think he knows now that he was wrong to do it." Suddenly Speckledthorn's ears pricked forward. A strange look shadowed over his face.

"Did you hear that?" Darkshadow asked.

"Yes."

"Scream."

"From the dump."

The two warriors took off, abandoning their hunt. They weren't far from the dump. Snowpaw nearly ran into them.

"Wildpaw! She's-"

"Run to camp," Speckledthorn ordered without breaking stride. He and Darkshadow kept pace, even if Darkshadow was quieter.

They arrived at the dump in moments. Darkshadow dove under the fence but was met with a wall of bodies. Speckledthorn cleared the fence in a quick series of jumps and landed in the middle of the fray. The rats were closing in on the apprentice. Wildpaw looked at Speckledthorn as though StarClan had just dropped him in front of her. He quickly set to work beating the rats back away from her. They hissed and chattered, trying to bite him.

"Wildpaw!"

Wildpaw turned to see who was calling her. Darkshadow's tabby pelt almost blended in with the rats, but he called to her again and she focused on him.

"Come on, Wildpaw! Jump! I'll catch you. Hurry!" Darkshadow urged. He was trying to fight his way toward her. The rats were alternating between attacking him and attacking each other to get closer to him. The sea of bodies and teeth around him was frightening, but his bright blue eyes focused on her. "Come on, Wildpaw, jump!"

Wildpaw did. She'd never met this cat before. Most of what she knew about him was his list of atrocities. Some considered him evil, but right now, as she flew through the air toward him, he was a savior. Jaws clamped tight around her scruff and held her above the swarm of bodies. Wildpaw would have been impressed-she wasn't exactly light-weight anymore-but now the rats were jumping and snapping at her. She curled her tail close to her body and tried to make herself small.

Teeth and tiny claws dug into Darkshadow's flesh, but he held on. He knew he might be holding onto the apprentice too tight, but he wasn't going to risk dropping her. A few puncture wounds in her scruff were nothing compared to being ripped apart by those chattering teeth. The rats drew blood and he screamed into Wildpaw's scruff as they were driven into a frenzy of trying to rip his flesh off. One bit into his wounded shoulder and he almost dropped the she-cat. His neck ached with the effort it took to hold her so high, but he forced himself to swing her body hard and throw her toward the hole.

"Run!" he shouted. A rat jumped onto him back and bit into his good ear, making him yowl. He ripped the rat away, ripping his ear as well, and killed it.

Wildpaw landed hard just in front of the hole in the fence and scrambled out as a rat snapped at her. Some tried to follow her, but their bodies clogged the hole and they turned on one another instead.

"Speckledthorn!" she cried. The calico had almost disappeared amidst the dark bodies.

"I'll get him. Don't worry. I'll get him. Right now run!" Darkshadow shouted.

Wildpaw backed away from the fence and Darkshadow disappeared in the swarm of bodies. Without seeing his eyes, Wildpaw couldn't track him.

Minutes or moments later, it seemed nearly the whole clan was racing to the fence. The rats saw the oncoming army and backed off, disappearing back into the shadows. Several warriors jumped over the fence to scatter the creatures faster.

Darkshadow was finally visible, gripping Speckledthorn by the scruff and dragging the calico to the hole in the fence. The tabby's limp was pronounced now and he was covered in blood. It was amazing that he was even standing. He struggled to shove Speckledthorn through the hole before him. A couple of warriors on the other side took hold of the calico and pulled him through. Two more helped Darkshadow.

"NO!" Thicketclaw screamed. She raced over and buried her face in the calico's bloody fur. "Speckledthorn. Speckledthorn! Wake up! Please!"

Stormpaw was beside her, looking like she was going to be sick. Clawpaw was trying to comfort his sister, but didn't look much better. Russetfur had been alerted to the crisis and had informed the apprentices and the three had raced over.

Littlecloud ran up with Snowpaw. Both were carrying loads of herbs. Littlecloud took one look at Speckledthorn before continuing on to Darkshadow.

Thicketclaw looked up. "What are you doing? WHAT ARE YOU DOING? COME BACK HERE! SPECKLEDTHORN NEEDS YOUR HELP MORE THAN HE DOES!" she yelled and Littlecloud.

What she said was true. Speckledthorn did look in worse shape than Darkshadow. Not only was Speckledthorn bloodier, but huge chunks of his flesh had been ripped away. His bones were exposed in some places. His eyes were shut- one was, in fact, gone-…and he didn't appear to be breathing.

Littlecloud sighed sadly as he worked over Darkshadow, not looking up.

"LITTLECLOUD!" Thicketclaw yelled. Tigerstripe appeared beside her and pressed against her side. "What's he doing? Speckledthorn needs him!" she nearly sobbed to the orange tabby.

"Thicketclaw, I don't think Speckledthorn needs anything anymore," Tigerstripe said softly.

"Wh-what do you mean?" Thicketclaw asked, trying desperately to deny what she already knew. "No…No!" She collapsed into sobs against Tigerstripe's chest, denying it again and again.

Stormpaw turned into Clawpaw's chest, her body trembling. Clawpaw buried his face into Stormpaw's neck and shut his eyes tight.

"It's my fault. It's all my fault. It's my fault…" Wildpaw chanted to herself quietly, staring with wide eyes at Speckledthorn's mangled body. "Oh, StarClan, it's all my fault!"

Russetfur met Jaggedtooth's eyes. For a moment the two shared a look of grief, but they didn't approach. Instead, they allowed Ruckus and Snip to mourn over their lost son.

Darkshadow felt numb as Littlecloud worked. He knew it wasn't his fault. Not really anyone's fault, but he felt guilty. He wished he could have defended Speckledthorn better. He wasn't sure why, but he'd started to feel a kinship with the calico. In many ways, they were similar. Now he'd never know the tom.

"I'm sorry I never got to know you, either," Darkshadow whispered.

Blackstar called that it was time for the clan to return to camp. Several warriors helped lift Speckledthorn's body. Wildpaw seemed to have thrown herself into a state of catatonia and ended up having to be carried back to camp. Thundertail and Mudriver appeared to help Darkshadow. Every cat was silent…

***Sniff sniff* By Speckledthorn. I'll miss you.**


	35. Chapter 34

Darkshadow lay alone in Littlecloud's den. His wounds stung horribly, but he was thankful for the root pulp Littlecloud had applied. As much as it stung, an infection would be much worse. He sighed, mildly surprised by how sad he was over Speckledthorn's death. Darkshadow remembered a time when he would have considered the calico's death a blessing. But then, there had been a time when he would have considered almost anyone's death a blessing. Needless to say, he didn't feel that way anymore and he was glad for it, even if it caused more pain.

Darkshadow glanced out of the den. It was a sunny day. Very sunny. He couldn't remember seeing a single cloud in the sky, but the temperature was almost perfect, if a little unseasonably warm. It seemed…wrong to him. Speckledthorn's death seemed like it should warrant rain, lightening, high winds, clouds at least. Not a perfect day like today was. Darkshadow imagined kittypets, rogues, clan cats –Hell probably every animal in the area– sunning themselves lazily in the lovely warmth, enjoying themselves before the weather turned cold, unaware of the tragedy. It bothered Darkshadow. And the helpless feeling he'd gotten while trying to fight his way to Speckledthorn bothered him too. But what chilled Darkshadow most was a small smile Speckledthorn had given him just before a rat had lunged straight at the calico's throat and he disappeared beneath the sea of bodies.

~X~

Littlecloud gingerly arranged Speckledthorn's mangled limbs. There was no way to make the ragged shell look presentable, but Littlecloud tried. Speckledthorn's body had been set down outside of the camp.

Most of the clan stood by, paying respects. They eventually trickled away slowly. It was time to leave those closest to Speckledthorn to share tongues with him one last time.

Russetfur caught Jaggedtooth's eye again briefly before the tom turned and walked slowly back into the camp. Her gaze flicked over to where Snip, Ruckus, Thicketclaw, and Stormpaw lay mourning and gently licking the seemingly endless blood from the multi-colored fur. It occurred to Russetfur that neither she nor Jaggedtooth had ever shared tongues with their son. Russetfur shook the thought away. Speckledthorn was not her son. She'd given him up to maintain her role in the clan. She didn't regret the decision. The dark ginger she-cat stood and left Speckledthorn to his family.

Littlecloud approached where Wildpaw sat curled against her sister's side. Snowpaw, Mousepaw, and Clawpaw were speaking to her softly, but she never stopped her mantra.

"It's my fault. All my fault…"

"Shh," Snowpaw crooned. "It's not. Really, it's not."

"Wildpaw, you're injured," Littlecloud said softly. "I'd like to take you back to my den and take care of that. I don't want you to get an infection."

Wildpaw nodded dumbly but didn't remove herself from Snowpaw's side. Snowpaw glanced at Littlecloud, then stood and coaxed Wildpaw to come with her to the medicine cat's den.

Mousepaw sighed, not following. "I've never seen her like this before. It frightens me," he said.

"She's never seen a death like that before. It probably frightens her much more. Not to mention she blames herself for it and likely fears Thicketclaw's reaction," Clawpaw said, scratching his neck.

"Do you think Darkshadow will be ok?" Mousepaw asked.

"Yeah. He's hard to kill," Clawpaw said quietly.

Wildpaw didn't react as Littlecloud spread the pulp over her wounds. Darkshadow and Speckledthorn had managed to keep the apprentice from most harm, but the rats had managed a few good bites to her legs and tail. Snowpaw lay beside her sister, still, whispering comforts that did no good.

After doing all he could for the apprentice, Littlecloud walked over to do a more extensive examination of Darkshadow. "Didn't I tell you just this morning to not make a habit of visiting my den?" Littlecloud asked, checking Darkshadow's right shoulder.

Darkshadow gave a small smile. "I've only done it twice. It's not a habit, yet. Besides, I thought you'd miss my company." His voice was a bit flatter than he'd intended, but Littlecloud didn't seem to take notice.

Just then, three forms entered the den. Once they got out of the glaring sunshine, they were easy to recognize.

As soon as Littlecloud stepped back from Darkshadow, Windlegs rushed forward, nuzzling her face against Darkshadow's. She didn't whimper or cry, but he could feel her genuine concern for him and pressed his cheek back against hers.

Thundertail and Mudriver stepped forward, bearing slight smiles. Pain was evident behind their eyes. They may have never been very close to Speckledthorn, but he was still a loss. One that they felt.

"Gee," Mudriver spoke up, "your first day back and already you're a hero."

Darkshadow forced a chuckle. "I don't exactly feel that way," he said, glancing over at Wildpaw who had fallen asleep curled against Snowpaw's side. "I went under the fence; he went over it. He jumped right in the middle of the fray to get those rats away from Wildpaw. If I'd gone straight to the middle then–"

"Then who would have carried Wildpaw to safety?" Littlecloud cut in.

Darkshadow looked up at the medicine cat. "Well, maybe she could have…" he trailed off.

"Darkshadow, as feisty and skilled as Wildpaw may be, she'd never have gotten out of there on her own. Speckledthorn went to the center because that would draw the rats' attention to him so you and Wildpaw would have a chance. You needed to be closer to the outside so you could get her out. Even if he knew he was going to die, I bet he would make the same choice again in a heartbeat," Thundertail said.

_I think he did know he was going to die,_ Darkshadow thought, remembering that smile and flashes of the conversation they'd had that morning. Yes, Speckledthorn had been acting a little strange all day. Darkshadow should have seen it. But what would he have done?

Darkshadow, Thundertail, Mudriver, and Windlegs sat in silence for a while. None of them could think of anything to say. There wasn't much to say.

Tigerstripe entered the den a short while later. He didn't look at Darkshadow. "Windlegs, they're going to bury Speckledthorn now. Are you going to come?" he asked.

Windlegs glanced at Darkshadow, then nodded to Tigerstripe. She leaned in as though she were going to press her nose to Darkshadow's, but seemed to change her mind and backed away. Windlegs stood and walked out of the den with her brother.

Thundertail and Mudriver looked at each other.

"You should go," Darkshadow said.

"Huh?" Mudriver asked.

"Speckledthorn was a good cat. You've known him since he was a kit. You may not have been very close to him, but still…I think you should go. I'll still be here when you get back. This'll be your last chance to see him," Darkshadow explained.

"I…uh…You sure?" Mudriver asked.

"I wouldn't say it if I wasn't sure. Go," Darkshadow insisted.

Thundertail and Mudriver each touched their noses to Darkshadow's forehead before leaving the den.

Darkshadow felt a twist in his stomach as they left. He knew they were trying and they would continue to try, but things couldn't go back to the way they were before. They couldn't just ignore what had happened, what he'd done. How would they react if they knew how he'd spent his exile? Who he'd spent it with? He'd torn them apart once. And, unless he kept a very tight hold on his tongue, this time he'd destroy them.

"_So why'd you come back if you knew it was going to be like this?" _Darkstripe asked. He must have slipped out of his cage while Darkshadow was fighting the rats.

"_Because I said I would. And I have to try," _Darkshadow replied, shutting his eyes.

"_How noble, but you just admitted that things can't go back to the way they were. If they found out who you really were, they'd never forgive you, if they even will this time," _Darkstripe sneered.

"_They will forgive me because they won't find out. It's in the past, now. I'm back," _Darkshadow said.

"_Oh, I understand. So you can just turn the value of certain morals on and off depending on the situation. If only someone would explain that to the rest of the forest, that could have saved Daddy."_

"_It's not like that. It's just desperate times call for desperate measures."_

"_Yeah, you were pretty desperate," _Darkstripe snorted.

"_I did what I had to in order to survive so I could come back here and prove myself," _Darkshadow snarled.

"_Are saving stupid apprentices and getting a spanking from the leader more of your penance or are you on a masochistic-hero streak?"_ Darkstripe let out a mocking laugh.

"_I'm going to prove that they were wrong to cast me out –to underestimate my value. But in the end I guess it was a good thing because now I'm even better. If the ungrateful pricks out there can see it, then the ungrateful pricks here will."_

"_But first, you need your old posse back and they seem a bit edgy around you right now. How do you plan to make them get over that little bump? Let them give you another spanking?"_

"_Would you shut up about that!" _Darkshadow roared in his head._ "I was tired and injured and…I didn't expect Blackstar to know how to fight like that."_

"_Yeah, why do you suppose he knew those dirty little tricks? Wasn't he a rogue? It's very possible he could have dug up a juicy dark past that would make him sympathetic to your own wayward behavior,"_ Darkstripe said in a conspiratorial tone.

"_Enough out of you," _Darkshadow said, but he couldn't muster up the strength to stuff Darkstripe back in his cage. He was too tired. Allowing the events of the past two days wash over him, Darkshadow fell asleep.

~X~

"Darkshadow? Hey, Darkshadow, wake up. C'mon, Darkshadow, please wake up."

Darkshadow cracked one eye open. The first thing he felt was a fresh wave of pain washing over his entire body. He groaned and heard, to his confusion, a sigh of relief. Moving as little as possible, he looked at where the voice had come from that woke him up. His eyes settled on Wildpaw. She'd snapped out of her self-guilt-trip the previous morning so Snowpaw was no longer curled up beside her.

"Are you ok?" Wildpaw asked.

"I was until I woke up. Now I'm in pain," he replied.

"Sorry, it's just you weren't moving and I couldn't see you breathing. I was worried," Wildpaw explained.

"It's ok, I suppose, if you were concerned for my wellbeing. Where's Littlecloud?" Darkshadow glanced around the den. The tabby medicine cat was nowhere to be found.

"He went out to get more herbs for you a little while ago. He told me to keep an eye on you and call for someone if something went wrong. I don't know when he'll be back," Wildpaw said, glancing out at the late evening sky.

Darkshadow groaned again. His wounds were throbbing with every heartbeat. Waiting for relief wasn't exactly something he wanted to do right now, but apparently he didn't have a choice so he laid his head stiffly back down on his paws.

Wildpaw looked down at her paws, feeling foolish and ashamed. First, she dragged her sister to the dump and attacked her which put her sister in danger when the ground caved in. In saving her, Speckledthorn had been killed and Darkshadow had been badly hurt. Now she was making Darkshadow suffer because of her own guilty paranoia. She looked over at Darkshadow, again. Most of his tabby coat was covered in bandages, but a few of his old scars were still visible under the cob webs. She found herself staring curiously at the silvery scars.

Darkshadow's fur prickled. This was a familiar feeling. Someone was watching him. He turned his head slightly and saw Wildpaw staring at him. When she realized he'd caught her, she lowered her eyes to the ground quickly. "Is it the scars?" he asked.

Wildpaw now felt embarrassed as well. She nodded slowly. "You have so many. Did you get them while you were in the clan?" she asked.

"Only the one across my muzzle. The others I got out in the rogue territories. Well, except for the work the rats just did on me," Darkshadow said.

Wildpaw looked away again.

Darkshadow decided to shift her thoughts away from the rats by saying the first thing that came to his head. "It's a much different world out there, you know."

"In the rogue territories?" Wildpaw asked.

Darkshadow nodded. "They don't believe like the clans do," he said.

"You mean like they don't believe in StarClan?"

"Yeah, like that. Many of them don't believe in anything. Others believe in things much more complex than StarClan."

"Like what?" Wildpaw asked, deeply intrigued.

"Well, of the ones I spoke to, they had stories that go back further than the clan legends," Darkshadow said.

"Like, before the time of TigerClan, LionClan, and LeopardClan?" she asked in wonder.

"Yes, before even them," Darkshadow said, suddenly wondering if he should actually be telling Wildpaw this. The rogues wouldn't mind, obviously, but the clan might. Still, it was distracting her from her guilt and she wouldn't necessarily believe what he had to say.

"Would you…would you tell me one of those legends?" she asked shyly.

Darkshadow thought for a minute. The clan hadn't forgiven him; that was certain. Even Thundertail, Mudriver, and Windlegs hadn't forgiven him. He wasn't delusional enough to believe that one good deed had made up for all the sins he'd committed. He knew they would try to act as if it had and that things could go back to normal, especially Mudriver would try to put on a mask of contentment, but it would all be an act. He had a long way to go yet to earn their trust back. If they found out he was teaching an apprentice outside ways, would they think he was planning something?

On the other hand, telling her a story might keep both of them distracted from their pain until Littlecloud returned. And she probably wouldn't believe the story, anyway. One taste of a belief system wouldn't be enough to counteract an entire lifetime of another. One story hadn't been enough to convince him.

"Sure," he said finally, "I can tell you one. But I'd rather you keep it between us, ok?"

Wildpaw nodded, growing excited.

"Alright. First, as you know, the rogues don't believe in StarClan. They believe in a force that they call 'the Creator' and that this Creator made everything that's on the Earth," Darkshadow began.

"Like, all the animals in the forest?" Wildpaw asked.

"Yes and creatures we have never seen right under our noses and beyond the forest and the rogue territories," Darkshadow answered.

"There's more than that?" Wildpaw said in shock.

"Much more. What did you think; that the world just dropped off on the other side of the mountains?" Darkshadow asked with amusement.

"And they think that one cat created all that?" Wildpaw clearly looked doubtful.

"Pretty much, but the Creator isn't a cat. The Creator is something that is unlike anything on Earth."

It was obvious that Wildpaw was having trouble visualizing this.

"Anyway," Darkshadow continued, "first, the Creator made the plants. After that, It made animals. Every animal you can think of and thousands of others you've never heard of and could never imagine populated the land, water, and air. The Creator tried many different things, changing Its creation constantly for a long time, sometimes wiping out entire species to start over. Finally, the Creator stopped and allowed Its creation to grow on its own and develop. Among the creatures that developed was a family that the Creator named Felidae. In the Felidae family, there were seven that were much larger than all of the others.

"The largest was called Leo. You should be familiar with him. Some of his children formed a group called LionClan."

Wildpaw's eyes widened. "Rogues know about LionClan?"

"Not exactly. But if you connect the legends, Leo appears to be the eldest ancestor of LionClan. This took place a very long time before LionClan. I'm sure most, if not all, of LionClan would have had no idea about Leo.

"Second largest was Tigris."

"TigerClan's ancestor?"

Darkshadow nodded. "There were the three spotted ones: Pardus, who was the ancestor of LeopardClan; Onca, who looked like Pardus but was bigger and stronger; and Jabatus, who was the smallest of the spotted ones but the fastest runner.

"Concolor had no markings, but could blend seamlessly into mountainsides."

Wildpaw counted in her head. "That's only six. You said there were seven," she said.

Darkshadow smiled. "You're right. The seventh head of the Felidae family was one you'll be very familiar with. His name was Catus and his size was only rivaled by Leo and Tigris."

"You mean cats like us, right?"

Darkshadow nodded.

"That's impossible! Cats could never be larger than LeopardClan!" Wildpaw insisted.

"That's what the story will explain. Assuming you still want to hear it," Darkshadow said.

Wildpaw nodded, looking skeptical but intrigued.

"Catus was very different from the rest of the family. While the others had distinct coats, his could change design and color at will, a trait he'd passed on to his children. He was also very cunning and proud. He believed that he should rule the Felidae. The other Felidae thought this was a ridiculous idea and laughed at him. Catus became angry by this and vowed revenge on the others.

"He gathered together his many children and ordered them to disguise themselves as the children of the others and kill their children. The other Felidae were not as foolish as Catus believed them to be and caught onto his scheme quickly. Outraged, they declared war on Catus.

"Despite the greater numbers of the other six, the war lasted many years. Catus's children were just as cunning as he was, their coats allowed them to hide better, and they could multiply faster. But finally, Catus was captured and the leaders brought him before the Creator, demanding punishment.

"The Creator had seen the devastation caused by Catus and his children and was very upset. Never before had such a war taken place, especially within a family. The Creator allowed each of the leaders to place a curse on Catus and his children, but, because he still loved Catus, they could not wish to wipe his children out or kill him.

"Leo was the first to speak. 'Take away their size!' he ordered. 'Remove them as a threat.'

"'Exile them from the rest of the family. Make sure they can't start another war,' Tigris said.

"Concolor insisted it was Catus's ability to change colors that allowed Catus and his children to start the war and hide so well. He demanded that each child be limited to one pelt and Catus have all pigment removed from his body so that he would be easy to see.

"Jabatus said angrily, 'Make their predators many. Let them feel what it's like to be prey.'

"Onca had a better idea. 'Have them hunt each other. Let the war for them never end!'

"Catus was horrified and cried out to the Creator, 'Please! You've taken away our size and ability to hide. If my children war with each other eternally, they will soon die out! I beg you, make at least one of them reconsider!'

"Leo, Tigris, Concolor, and Jabatus all refused to change their minds, but Onca smiled. 'Very well, then you will curse your own children. Every generation, you will choose six percent of your own brood to suffer persecution from the others. Six out of every hundred will suffer as we six have suffered.'

"The others nodded and murmured their agreement, but Leo surprised everyone by objecting. He reminded everyone that while Catus –like the rest of the first generation– had a long lifespan, he would eventually die. When he died, he would no longer be able to affect the physical world enough to perform the curse. Leo wanted a permanent punishment.

"Then Pardus stepped forward. 'Then, for his final curse, he shall live until the last of his children dies. He will spend that entire time living with the consequences of his actions and watching his children suffer for them.'

"The six were at last in agreement. Catus and his children were cursed. The war was eventually forgotten in the generations, but the curses remained. Every generation, long after the others of the first generation had passed on, Catus was forced to choose six percent of his children to lay the curse mark on. On top of making other's persecute them, the curse mark also opens up the child's mind, giving them special abilities, but few of them ever discover why they have these abilities and often live out their entire lives unaware of the mark.

"But even with all the handicaps the others had placed on him, Catus still had his intelligence. He used it to work the curse to his advantage. He sought out groups of his children that he believed needed help. He then sent the cursed ones their way to live with them. He hoped that his children would take lessons from the cursed ones about the necessity of unity and the dangers of war," Darkshadow finished.

"What does the curse mark look like?" Wildpaw asked.

"I'm not sure. It's not really visible. It is something placed on the cat's soul and traces of it can be seen shining through their eyes. Subconsciously, this turns other cats away from them," Darkshadow explained.

"Why?" Wildpaw asked.

"Because normal cats can see that there is something wrong with the cursed one and that frightens them. Cursed cats also tend to be mentally unstable, somewhat, as a result of the extra strain the mark puts on their mind and soul," Darkshadow said.

Wildpaw sank into deep thought. She glanced over at the den entrance and jumped in surprise. Concerned, Darkshadow looked over as well and felt his heart skip a beat. Littlecloud was sitting just a few paces away. Neither patient had any idea how long the medicine cat had been sitting there.

"That was very interesting, Darkshadow. I've never heard a rogue legend before," Littlecloud said with a sincere smile. "Are you feeling better?'

"Yes," Darkshadow said honestly, surprised by how well telling the story had worked to dull his pain. But now that he was thinking about it again, the pain was quickly throbbing back to life. "I wouldn't mind some herbs, though," he added.

Littlecloud smiled and gathered up several herbs and passed them Darkshadow's way. Darkshadow took them thankfully. "Do you think you'll be well enough to leave the den for a short time tomorrow evening?"

"I dunno. Maybe. Why?" Darkshadow inquired.

"Blackstar tells me he's going to make Clawpaw and Stormpaw warriors. I thought you'd appreciate attending the ceremony," Littlecloud said.

"I would. Thank you," Darkshadow said.

"What about me?" Wildpaw asked quietly.

"I think you'll be free to go tomorrow. Darkshadow did well protecting you," Littlecloud said.

"Oh," was all Wildpaw said in response, looking at her paws. She still blamed herself for Speckledthorn's death. What if Thicketclaw blamed her, too? Thicketclaw had adored Speckledthorn. What would she do to the cat she blamed for his death? She looked up when she felt a paw on her shoulder.

"It'll be ok," Littlecloud said soothingly.

Wildpaw laid her head down on her paws. Dread was still swimming around in her stomach.

~X~

The next morning, Wildpaw was released from Littlecloud's den. The brown and black apprentice eagerly rushed over to her siblings who greeted her exuberantly.

_Well, at least none of them are mad at me,_ she thought as Snowpaw touched her nose to her sister's shoulder.

The others didn't have long to welcome Wildpaw back. Snowpaw and Mousepaw were soon called away by their respective mentors. Tigerstripe showed up to retrieve both Clawpaw and Stormpaw. Stormpaw didn't look very happy about going with Tigerstripe and Wildpaw felt another twinge of guilt, knowing she was missing her mentor.

Thicketclaw was nowhere in sight and Wildpaw was confused. What was the point of being released from Littlecloud's den if all she was going to do was sit around anyway? A shadow suddenly fell over her and she turned around. Thicketclaw was standing directly behind her. Wildpaw felt her heart leap up into her throat then sink back down into her stomach.

"Are you ready to return to training?" Thicketclaw asked, calmly.

Wildpaw nodded. She wouldn't have said no even if she wanted to.

"Good, then let's go," Thicketclaw said and led the way to the exit.

Wildpaw slowly followed.

The other apprentices and mentors seemed slightly surprised to see her when she and Thicketclaw arrived at the training area, but no one said anything. Tigerstripe had taken Clawpaw and Stormpaw somewhere else for their final day of training. Snowpaw and Mousepaw were sparing. Thicketclaw gave Wildpaw short notes as the other apprentices practiced.

Eventually, Mousepaw threw Snowpaw to the ground and pinned her. Tawnypelt called him out of the middle and Thicketclaw sent Wildpaw in. Wildpaw felt so worried and distracted, she was unable to focus and was soon tackled down, hard, by her sister. She let out a sharp grunt and Snowpaw backed off, quickly.

"I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?" Snowpaw asked, deep concern written across her face.

"No, no, I'm fine. I just got distracted, is all," Wildpaw said, brushing off her coat.

Snowpaw was replaced by Mousepaw. Again, Wildpaw stood no chance. Windlegs cast Thicketclaw a worried look. It was very unlike Wildpaw to lose so easily. Even her injuries should have been healed enough to no longer hinder her. Thicketclaw caught Windlegs's eye, but didn't seem to get the message. Windlegs jerked her head in Wildpaw's direction and mouthed something, but Thicketclaw just shook her head in confusion. Windlegs rolled her eyes and walked over to the other she-cat. Tawnypelt took over rotating the apprentices, leaving the two friends to talk.

"Talk to her," Windlegs whispered to Thicketclaw.

"About what?" Thicketclaw whispered back.

"Well, something's obviously on her mind," Windlegs said, hoping Thicketclaw would get the hint.

Thicketclaw was never very good with hints. "Like what?"

"The same thing that's probably on your mind." Windlegs looked deep into Thicketclaw's eyes.

Thicketclaw scoffed defensively. "I don't know what you're talking about. Wake up out there, Wildpaw!"

The apprentice nodded and faced off against Snowpaw again.

"Thicketclaw, don't do that. Don't you dare do that," Windlegs growled.

"Don't do what?" Thicketclaw asked in an exasperated tone.

"Don't pretend it didn't happen."

A strange look passed over Thicketclaw's face and her voice dropped so low that Windlegs had trouble hearing her over the apprentices' scuffling. "I'm not pretending it didn't happen. I'm just trying to focus on other things."

"Well I'm glad you can do that, but I don't think Wildpaw can and I don't think she will be able to until you talk to her."

Thicketclaw met Windlegs's blue eyes, then nodded. "Wildpaw," she called.

Wildpaw turned from watching her siblings wrestle. "Yes?" She looked nervous.

"Come here for a minute." Thicketclaw jerked her head toward the tall grass.

"Uh, ok, yeah," Wildpaw stammered and followed Thicketclaw.

When they'd gotten a decent distance away from the others, Thicketclaw stopped.

"So…" Thicketclaw said.

"So," Wildpaw repeated.

Thicketclaw shuffled her paws. "How've you been?" she asked, finally.

"Good," Wildpaw replied with a nod.

"What's, uh, what's been on your mind?"

"Nothing," Wildpaw said.

"Bullshit," Thicketclaw murmured.

"What?"

"You're acting totally unlike yourself today. I know something's bothering you so…talk about your feelings, damnit!" Thicketclaw ordered.

Wildpaw looked startled. "I…I…uh…" she stammered, uncertainly.

"Let me narrow it down. Talk about…" Thicketclaw hesitated. She hadn't said his name for the past two days. She took a deep breath. "Talk about Speckledthorn."

"Oh…" Wildpaw felt her tongue stiffen. She took a few moments, but she finally spoke. "I…I feel guilty for what happened. I know it's partly my fault and I'm worried that you hate me now. I know you loved him and it's my fault he's dead. You can hate me. It's ok. You can hate me and blame me all you want because I already do." The entire time she spoke she was looking at her paws, afraid to meet Thicketclaw's eye.

Thicketclaw didn't know what to say. She didn't talk about feelings. She'd never really had to. Speckledthorn did it for her. But now he was gone and she was lost. He wasn't coming back, and she knew it. That meant it was time she started figuring these things out for herself. So…did she blame Wildpaw for what had happened? "No, I don't blame you. And I don't hate you," Thicketclaw said. "I hate him. You could get so attached to that little fool. Where does he get off getting me so attached to him and then leaving like that? Idiot," she cursed.

"He wouldn't be gone if it weren't for me," Wildpaw said sullenly.

"It's not your fault, ok? Is that what you want to hear? I don't know whose fault it is. He's gone. That's that. There's no going back. He won't come back. We've got to accept that. It hurts and it'll keep hurting, but I don't blame you," Thicketclaw said, tone almost harsh but not out of anger.

Wildpaw was at a loss for words. What does one say after something like that?

"Now, you and I are going to go back to the training area and you're going to practice, ok?" Thicketclaw said.

Wildpaw nodded.

"Well, ok then…good," Thicketclaw said awkwardly but led the way back to the others with her head and tail held high.

Wildpaw's performance dramatically improved.

After training, Thicketclaw and Wildpaw returned to the camp side-by-side.

"Oh, Wildpaw, I forgot to mention before: you're on elders duty for the next moon," Thicketclaw said.

"What!" Wildpaw said.

"You didn't really think you'd go unpunished for sneaking off to the dump like that, did you?"

Wildpaw groaned and reluctantly made her way over to the elders' den.

"Smile, my little apprentice, smile!" Thicketclaw laughed.

Wildpaw turned around and stuck her tongue out at the she-cat. Thicketclaw just laughed again.

"Oh, so you lived," Snaketail said, scrutinizing the apprentice.

"No need to sound so disappointed," Wildpaw retaliated.

"Bah, like I actually care what happens to you. I'm still hoping that bloody rogue dies," Snaketail said.

"What did Mousepaw tell you? Don't talk about him like that," Wildpaw snapped, cleaning out the nests.

"I'll talk about him however I like. You can see the way he is now. He's even more fucked up on the inside," Snaketail sniffed.

"He saved my life," Wildpaw said.

"Oh great," Snaketail said sarcastically, "he saved the life of the clan idiot."

Wildpaw didn't respond. She just continued with her work.

~X~

That evening, leaning against Littlecloud's shoulder, Darkshadow limped out of the medicine cat's den. Littlecloud had wrapped Darkshadow's wounds with fresh bandages and helped the dark tabby groom what little of his fur was exposed.

Mudriver caught sight of Darkshadow and eagerly waved him over. Most of the clan turned to look at him but no one said anything. Littlecloud eased Darkshadow down between Mudriver and Thundertail before walking to the front of the crowd gathered in front of the announcement tree. Clawpaw and Stormpaw sat in the front of the group looking up at Blackstar. Tigerstripe sat between the two apprentices, head held high.

"Hey, after a beating like that you're already getting out," Thundertail said to Darkshadow.

"Of course he is! It'll take more than a few grody rats to stop _my_ apprentice," Mudriver said proudly.

Darkshadow wasn't paying attention to the conversation. He was looking at Windlegs who seemed reluctant to meet his eyes.

"I'm glad you're ok," Windlegs said awkwardly.

"Thanks," Darkshadow replied just as awkwardly. Windlegs's forgiveness would be the most difficult to attain and her trust would be even more difficult to get back.

Upon seeing Darkshadow appear, Blackstar began the ceremony. "Two days ago, ShadowClan lost a great warrior. Speckledthorn will be forever missed. But luckily for his clan, he left behind his well trained apprentice.

"Stormpaw, it is a pity Speckledthorn cannot stand beside you tonight, but I know he is watching you from StarClan with pride. You are ready to become a ShadowClan warrior. And so, before StarClan and Speckledthorn, I announce that from this point forward Stormpaw will be known by her warrior name: Stormthoughts."

Tigerstripe touched his nose to the new warrior's forehead as he knew Speckledthorn would have done.

"Clawpaw," Blackstar continued, "you also have the gift of a great mentor. I know Tigerstripe trained you to be strong and powerful. You are ready to join your sister in the ranks of the ShadowClan warrior. Let the clan and StarClan know that from this moment forward Clawpaw will be known by his warrior name: Clawfur."

The clan took up chanting the names of the two new warriors. Tigerstripe looked down at his former apprentice with pride shining through his eyes. Clawfur smiled up at him. Stormthoughts turned around and caught Darkshadow's eye. Darkshadow nodded. Her name was quite fitting.

When the clan quieted down, Blackstar spoke up again. "As is customary, the new warriors will guard the camp in silence tonight. Wildpaw, Snowpaw, Mousepaw, take a close look at these two. You will be joining them soon enough." With that, Blackstar leapt out of the tree. The warriors dispersed.

Darkflower approached her adopted kits to congratulate them and murmured words of encouragement to her younger kits. Before returning to the warriors' den, she walked over to Darkshadow. Darkshadow looked at her in confusion. Darkflower had never really spoken to him before. "You saved my daughter's life," she said to him. "That's three of my kits you've rescued. Thank you."

"I had help both times. Hopefully, I won't have to rescue anymore," Darkshadow said.

Darkflower nodded, then walked to the warriors' den.

"Quit getting yourself stuck in the medicine cat's den so much, huh? It ain't healthy," Mudriver said as Littlecloud approached to collect his patient.

"I'll do my best," Darkshadow promised.

"Yeah, we're looking forward to finally sharing a den with you," Thundertail added.

"You will," Darkshadow said. "Littlecloud, may I congratulate Stormthoughts and Clawfur before I go back to the den?" he asked.

"Alright, but make it quick," Littlecloud said, helping Darkshadow over to the two former apprentices.

Clawfur and Stormthoughts looked up when Darkshadow approached. Clawfur opened his mouth to greet him, but quickly shut it again when he remembered he had to keep silent.

"Congratulations you two. I'm very proud," Darkshadow said and then looked directly at Stormthoughts. "And I'm sure Speckledthorn is, too," he added.

Stormthoughts gave him a melancholy smile.

Littlecloud led Darkshadow away. "The silent vigil should be easy for her, don't you think?" the brown tabby said.

Darkshadow chuckled, then groaned. "My ribs are sore," he complained.

"I'll take care of it," Littlecloud promised.

~X~

"_Do you think this counts as talking?"_ Clawfur heard in his head. He looked over at his sister. She was looking at him out of the corner of her eye with a small smirk on her lips.

"…_Yes…" _Clawfur answered.

"_It's not like they can hear me talking," _Stormthoughts replied.

"_It…counts…Just…because…it's different…from…how…others…do it…you're…still…talking…in…your own…way…"_ Clawfur thought back to her, straining slightly. His head began to hurt. Since he'd chosen to use verbal speech, his skills at telepathic communication were not as sharply honed as his sister's. It took a lot of focus for him to accomplish even the smallest amount of communication which was why he usually spoke to her out loud. But he couldn't do that now.

"_Do you think StarClan will be angry?" _Stormthoughts asked.

"_I…don't…know…Do…you think…they…could…hear us?..."_ Clawfur asked. His head was throbbing. He wished she would stop talking.

"_I don't know. I've never spoken to them before. Brother, I can feel your head hurting."_

"_Then…hush…I feel bad…breaking the…rules…"_ Clawfur closed his eyes tightly. _"I think…this counts…We…are…supposed…to be…focused on…guarding…"_

"_You're right. I'm sorry,"_ Stormthoughts said and returned her focus to the deep, dark forest. She could hear small nocturnal creatures scuttling about. An owl screeched somewhere as it scooped up its unfortunate prey. Stormthoughts looked up at the starry sky and wondered where Speckledthorn could be up there.

~X~

Inside the warriors' den, two she-cats were still awake. They laid close together, keeping their voices low so as not to disturb their sleeping clanmates.

"It just felt…wrong, Windlegs," Thicketclaw whispered.

"Why?" Windlegs asked.

"I felt happy. Like, actually happy. He's gone and I was happy," Thicketclaw stammered, struggling to phrase her meaning.

"Why is that wrong?" Windlegs asked.

"Because he's gone! Don't you see? I forgot he was gone for just a second, but I forgot about him! It's only been two days! I loved him! I still do, but I forgot him!" Thicketclaw seemed on the verge of hysterics and was struggling to keep her voice down.

Windlegs pressed her cheek to Thicketclaw's. "It's ok," she whispered.

"It's not ok!" Thicketclaw insisted, trembling and laying her head on Windlegs's shoulder.

"It is. You didn't forget about him. You forgot about the pain. He would want you to forget the pain."

"You told me just this morning not to pretend he wasn't gone," Thicketclaw said.

"Forgetting the pain isn't the same as pretending he isn't gone. You know he's gone and you accept it. Now you're healing."

"I don't accept it," Thicketclaw said, pulling away from Windlegs and shaking her head. "I don't accept it. I want him back! He has to come back! I need him! I've always needed him."

"I don't know what to say, Thicketclaw," Windlegs said helplessly.

"I knew loving him would come with sacrifice, but I never thought…" Thicketclaw couldn't finish the sentence.

"I know how you feel," Windlegs said finally.

Thicketclaw gave her a strange look, then realization dawned on her features. Windlegs looked away.

"Even after everything…" Thicketclaw began.

"Like I said, I know how you feel. You realize it will require sacrifice and it'll hurt, but you also know that it can make you happy. And that makes it worth it," Windlegs said softly.

"So you've forgiven him?" Thicketclaw asked.

"No. That still hurts too much, but I know I will."

"Tigerstripe won't like it."

"I know." Windlegs looked over at her sleeping brother.

"I don't like it."

Windlegs looked into Thicketclaw's eyes.

"But if it makes you happy," Thicketclaw added after a pause.

Windlegs smiled. "We're kind of messed up, do you realize that?" she said.

"Yeah," Thicketclaw said with a small laugh. Her smile seemed strained for a moment and faded slightly, but it soon returned and she looked at her best friend with genuine happiness…

**You lose someone and they mean the world to you. You've lost your world, your direction, your being. And you don't know how you can go on living because your heart is gone. Nothing feels right. Then, one day, you smile, you laugh. For a moment, everything is normal again. And then you remember and you realize what you've done and the world falls apart again right on top of you. You lose the will to dig yourself out. Then, a ray of light streams in and you look up. Someone is offering their hand to you. Hesitantly, you take it and they pull you out into the light. At first, it hurts to see, but when your vision clears, you see that the world is still there. You look at the place you've been pulled from. There's a hole there. It will always be there. It's deep and ugly and it can never be filled, but the world around it is beautiful. And it seems silly that you should abandon the beauty because of this hole. So you leave the hole behind and it stays there. Then, you visit it one day and it's different. Flowers have begun to grow in it. Flowers that would have never had a chance of survival if you'd stayed in there.**

**This chapter was shorter than I thought it would be so have a poorly written metaphor for grief. It's a shortened and tweeked version of what I told a friend of mine after they laughed for the first time after losing their mother and felt bad about it.**

**Ok, as for the rest of this chapter: I suck at writing legends, ok? I wrote it in the doctor's office. I needed a legend and I've only ever attempted to write one before. And if anyone's wondering, The Creator is not the Judeo-Christian god. Similar, but different. Also, the names of the Felidae are taken from their various Latin scientific names. In case you couldn't figure it out by their descriptions, they are as follows: Leo-Lion, Tigris-Tiger, Pardus-Leopard, Onca-Jaguar, Jabatus-Cheetah, Concolor-Cougar, and Catus-Domestic Cat. We've finally heard Stormthoughts speak! (kinda) For any of you who thought she'd be all mysterious and wise when she speaks, sorry. She's just a normal young she-cat who happens to have weird powers. By the way, "grody" is a word that is not used enough and that makes me sad.**


	36. Chapter 35

**Yes, guys, I know it's been forever and I know you all want to kill me and I know this is a short chapter and I'm sorry. Finals and projects and the holidays had a choke-hold on me. Not to mention, this chapter gave me a devil of writer's block. We're talking the type of writer's block that gives writers nightmares. The type where every time you pick up a pencil or pen or put your fingers over the keys of your keyboard, little gremlins run up carrying a huge, heavy cube with bricks made of ground-up unicorn teeth mortared together with goat's blood and baby tears. And no matter how much you beg them not to, the gremlins drop that block right on your hands and it crushes them and the pain is so bad it makes all creative thoughts flee your mind. So I had a lot to deal with and I'm going to have tons more in the coming months, but I'm going to try really REALLY hard for you guys because there's only few chapters left in this story and I DO NOT want to drag it into yet ANOTHER year. I'm sorry it's taken so long already but thank you so SO much to all of you who have put up with me this long.**

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Mutt- black and white tom. Rogue.**

**Buck- muscular brown tabby tom. Rogue. (mentioned but not seen)**

**Lilith- pretty calico she-cat. Rogue. (mentioned but not seen)**

"Well, Littlecloud, can I leave yet?" Darkshadow asked.

Every morning for over a week had begun the same. Littlecloud would wake up and go check on his patient. Darkshadow would always be wide awake and clearly restless. Littlecloud would peel away the bandages covering the other tabby's body and inspect the damage. Within seconds, Darkshadow would ask if he could finally leave the den. Every time, Littlecloud had turned him down. Today was the same.

Darkshadow let out an exasperated sigh. "You're spoiling me, Littlecloud! If I'd taken this much down time while I was in exile, I'd be dead. I can't stand laying around this den another minute! I just got back and I'm not doing my part. I'm just mooching off the clan. That's not going to do good things for everyone's opinion of me."

"I'm sorry, Darkshadow, but you aren't in exile anymore. You're back in ShadowClan and while you're here you have to do as I say. And I say you have to stay in here until I'm satisfied with your healing."

"I heal faster when I'm in action. I can't handle this, Littlecloud. It's not me. You've gotta let me out of here. I'm gonna go crazy and that won't be good for anyone."

"Just a little longer, Darkshadow," Littlecloud promised. "The clan is grateful to you for what you did. I think they can handle hunting for you for a bit longer. Besides, we all know you'll excel in hunting once we let you loose."

"Prey is going to become scarce soon. We can't handle wasting prey on someone who isn't doing anything. Damnit, Littlecloud, I'm fine. Been fine. I heal fast, no infections. I'm a little sore, a little stiff, but I just need to work my muscles a bit and I'll be fine. Inactivity and I don't mesh. I think this is even stunting my healing." Darkshadow looked at Littlecloud pleadingly.

Littlecloud sighed as he inspected the ugly-looking scars. Darkshadow did have a remarkable healing ability. Littlecloud wasn't sure if he'd inherited it or if it was an acquired ability resulting from a body too used to taking abuse. The wound on Darkshadow's shoulder had closed up, a thick scab waiting to fall away to reveal a scar to match the one on the other shoulder. Some of the bite marks from the rats had already fallen away to reveal their own fresh scars.

"Fine. If you promise not to push yourself too hard, I'll let you go tomorrow," Littlecloud relented.

"If I promise to be extra careful, can I go today?"

"Don't push it," Littlecloud warned.

Darkshadow shut his mouth, silently cheering for his victory. How much fatter would he become in just one day? Looking down at his torn body, Darkshadow was still quite thin, but he still felt like he was letting himself go by eating when he was just spending his day lazing around a den.

Darkshadow looked up to see Littlecloud leaving the den. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Out to get supplies. I'll be back soon."

"Damn, it gets so lonely here without your company. Who's going to watch over me like a hawk to make sure I don't move my leg to much and rip all my wounds back open?"

Littlecloud chuckled, but he caught a hint of sincerity in Darkshadow's voice. The dark tabby was lonely. Thundertail and Mudriver made occasional visits, but there was one cat that had been very obviously absent throughout Darkshadow's stay in the medicine cat's den. Littlecloud understood why. Windlegs had taken Darkshadow's betrayal hard. Harder than the other two had. He just hoped she'd be able to forgive Darkshadow soon.

Darkshadow sighed and clawed at the dirt by his nest in boredom. With a groan, he rolled onto his back, hissing slightly at the tug on his scabs. Maybe he should have pushed it with Littlecloud. He wasn't sure he'd be able to keep himself entertained for another hour, let alone another day.

"_You've always got me, baby."_

And that didn't make him feel any better at all. Blocking out the voice, Darkshadow stood from his nest and gave a cautious stretch.

"Ow! Fuck!" he hissed. He'd stretched too far and a couple of his scabs had ripped open, bubbling out a bit of blood.

"_Better not let Mother see that. He'll never let you out of here."_

Darkshadow rolled his eyes. It hadn't taken much of Littlecloud's protectiveness for Darkstripe to take to calling the tabby "Mother". Unfortunately, Darkstripe was probably close to being right, so Darkshadow carefully cleaned the wounds and hoped Littlecloud wouldn't notice. Littlecloud hadn't applied new bandages this morning. The bandages were now only necessary at night. Or at least to Littlecloud they were necessary at night. Darkshadow found them terribly annoying and uncomfortable. He was beginning to wonder if Littlecloud wasn't just trying to get his own little bit of revenge for what he'd done. Whatever the reason, Darkshadow was just glad that this nightmare was almost over. He could finally return to being a ShadowClan warrior, his whole purpose for coming back to the forest in the first place…Well, maybe not his _whole_ purpose.

Without having to worry about Littlecloud's smothering, Darkshadow decided to spend the day enjoying the sun. It was bright outside and a flash of something caught his eye. Windlegs's pelt was brilliant in the sunlight and Darkshadow could have sworn she was looking at him the moment before he noticed her. He couldn't be certain and within moments she disappeared into the shadows of the forest. Darkshadow wanted to follow, but he could hear Littlecloud's disapproval already.

"Hey! Look who's out of prison!"

Darkshadow grinned at Mudriver. "Temporarily. Tomorrow's when it's going to be permanent."

"Littlecloud is finally letting you out?" Mudriver's expression turned into one of elation when Darkshadow nodded. Without thinking, he tackled Darkshadow in celebration.

"YOW! Jeez, Mudriver, do you want to send me back with a few broken ribs before I've even been released?"

"Oh! Yeah! Sorry!" Mudriver quickly backed off and let Darkshadow up.

"No problem, just go easy on me, yeah? I'm still crippled."

"Then what good to us are you?"

Darkshadow sighed and turned around. Snaketail had hobbled out of the elders' den purely for the presented occasion of tormenting Darkshadow once more.

"I was wondering when you'd welcome me back, Mama. I see your legs aren't any better." Darkshadow stopped Mudriver from lashing out a retort.

"They're stronger. No thanks to that brute. We should have cut his throat for showing such brutality to his own clanmate." Snaketail shot a glare at Mudriver.

Darkshadow physically stepped between the two. "Tell me, Mama, what made you so bitter? I know where I went wrong–"

"You were born, that's where you went wrong!" Snaketail cut in.

"That line is getting old. But if my fault was existing, what's yours?" Darkshadow closed the space between himself and Snaketail and laid down in front of her. She glared down at him but he kept an expression of curiosity. "Was it losing your kits? I hear you were bitter before that. Losing Dad?"

"Don't call him that, you mangy–"

"My mistake," Darkshadow amended. "But really, I'm curious. Tell me about yourself."

"I wish I'd killed you," Snaketail hissed.

"I already knew that." Darkshadow rolled onto his back and smiled up at Snaketail, flicking his tail over his exposed stomach. "C'mon, Mama, I'm your son."

"You're not my–"

"You know everything about me. I know nothing about you."

"And that's the way it's going to stay. You tell someone your secrets and they get power over you."

"Then you should have nothing to fear," Darkshadow rolled over and stood up, his face becoming dead serious, "should you, _Mama_? After all, you know everything about me. You know all my secrets." Darkshadow leaned forward slightly, intimidation coming off of him in waves as the sun shadowed his features. "You hold all the power here, don't you?"

Snaketail scowled at him, holding his gaze for several moments. Finally, she scoffed, turned, and walked away muttering to herself.

Darkshadow's demeanor changed completely as he turned to Mudriver with a smile on his face. "So if I'm gonna finally get to join the warriors, should I get a nest or something?"

Mudriver shook off the goosebumps he'd gotten from the previous encounter and grinned. "Yeah ya do! Me n Thundertail'll take care of it for ya. You like your nest all sparse n stuff, right? Or have you gone soft on us?"

"Sparse it is. You sure the other warriors won't be on edge about my triumphant return?"

"I'm sure I don't care," Mudriver replied with a shrug.

Mudriver and Darkshadow spent several hours in each others' company. Littlecloud, despite his hovering tendencies, allowed Darkshadow to stay out after some reasoning on the warriors' parts.

"Mudriver! There you are," came an irritated call just as Mudriver was relaying some of the events that had happened while Darkshadow was away.

"Shit!" Mudriver hissed and turned to face Russetfur.

"The patrol's waiting for you," the deputy growled, cuffing the gray tom in the ears.

Mudriver winced. "Yeah, I know, but I was just–"

"Just going! Now move your tail before I tear it off."

Mudriver heaved a defeated sigh and followed Russetfur over to his hunting patrol.

"We'll talk later," Darkshadow called after him.

~X~

It felt good to be racing through the forest again. Darkshadow hadn't realized just how much energy he had to burn off until he'd pounced on his first piece of prey in weeks. He was tempted to start chasing his quarries around for a bit, but he didn't want to risk raising an alarm among the forest animals. That was no way to gain the clan's appreciation back.

He wasn't on a formal hunting patrol at the moment. Russetfur had agreed to give him the dawn border patrol. He never thought he'd beg for a dawn patrol, but he couldn't contain his desire to get back out into the forest. He hadn't been cooped up so long in moons and it was driving him insane. He was missing nights spent in the open watching the stars cycle overhead and feeling the wind swirl around the grass.

Dens were rare in the rogue territories. Sleeping places and sleeping habits were irregular to the point of nearly being unpredictable. Learning to sleep in two-leg place hadn't been as hard as he'd expected. It probably had something to do with the fact that he'd slept there after his birth. Subconsciously, he was used to it. The loud squeals of the monsters and bright lights as they passed, the horrible fumes burning his nose, the eerie lack of true darkness anywhere, all had felt strangely familiar even though he couldn't remember them from his short kithood. Sleeping in the mountains had been far better, however. The smell after rain in the mountains was different from the forest. It was sharper, crisper. It probably had something to do with the cooler air. He recalled wanting to stay in the mountains, but couldn't. He'd been there on business and the territory apparently belonged to another group of cats.

Darkshadow shook the memories away. It did no good to dwell on them. He was glad to be back in the forest. That much he would never be able to deny. He'd missed it here.

Windlegs had been on the patrol. He'd missed her, too. He wanted to talk to her but was reluctant to initiate conversation. For her part, she couldn't seem to decide whether she wanted to be near him or not. She'd constantly change pace during the patrol to either bring herself to his side, or several paces ahead of him. She went behind him once, but quickly sped up again to walk in front.

Aside from Windlegs, Stormthoughts had also been on the patrol. She spent most of the time near Darkshadow in her usual silence, but Darkshadow could feel her constantly glancing at him. It had eventually driven him to ask her why she was doing it, but she'd just smirked at him, faced forward, and remained silent.

The rest of the patrol ignored him completely which he was more than content with. It didn't take him long to realize he should have requested a hunting patrol. The mixed signals he was getting from the two she-cats was making him antsy and by the time the patrol was over, he was actually glad to be returning to camp. But he'd still been stoked up with energy so he allowed everyone to enter the camp ahead of him and took off into the forest as soon as the last of them disappeared through the tunnel.

If he had to guess, he'd have to say he'd been hunting for the better part of an hour. But hunting was becoming boring. He'd spent six moons hunting in much more difficult conditions. The activity he'd once enjoyed had turned into little more than a chore over those six moons. It was difficult to relax back into his old routine. So he stopped hunting and ran. No matter what, he had missed ShadowClan territory. The rogue territories were mostly exposed and flat until the mountains. He missed the shadows and the secrets laying in wait under every bush and around every tree.

He remembered the nights Mudriver had made him run until he thought he'd die. He remembered running with Blackstar all the way to the Moon Stone and back and the exhaustion that had hit him afterward. Now he was confident he could run for three days straight and, while hunting was now a chore, the freedom running gave him never faded. He'd spent most of his youth running from one thing or another. Now he didn't have to run away. He could run _to_ something and face it.

He reached the edge of ShadowClan territory, just before the tall grass and bushes gave way to the shortened grass surrounding the two-leg nest that had housed Shadow, Lynn, and their sons. Venturing too near this place was what had gotten him into so much trouble in the first place. He smirked at the memory.

"_We'd certainly give them a run for their tails if we returned now, wouldn't we?"_

"_What's this?" _Darkstripe exaggerated his shock. _"The great holier-than-thou prince is starting a conversation with a lowly creature such as myself for once? The apocalypse is upon us!"_

Darkshadow rolled his eyes. "_Don't flatter yourself. You just happen to be the only one around I could talk to about it."_

"_Tell me, why exactly are you talking to me about this? I thought you didn't want to relive the glory days? Missing your old friends, Princey?"_

Darkshadow snarled and spun around, stalking away from the border. _"Those aren't my glory days."_

"_Right. Your glory days came after the ring. Still, you should thank those guys for giving you practice. You sure tore it up after you rid yourself of their rules…Don't send your anger to me! You're the one that brought this up. Maybe you should talk to Littlecloud about your moodsw–"_

Darkshadow angrily stuffed Darkstripe away. For once, Darkshadow's anger wasn't really Darkstripe's fault. He'd been right that Darkshadow had begun the conversation and, at the time, Darkshadow had been feeling pride. But Darkshadow knew his pride was wrong and having Darkstripe around wouldn't help him kick the habit of feeling it anyway.

The dark tabby slipped through the territory, sniffing around for the prey he'd buried. As he neared a cache, a familiar scent caught his nose. He crouched down and rolled his shoulders, flexing his claws. He released the muscles in his legs and sprang forward. His victim would have cried out, but Darkshadow clamped one paw over his mouth. A second later, the intruding tom was on the ground with one of Darkshadow's front paws holding his jaws shut and the other pressed against his throat.

"What are you doing here, Mutt?" the tabby hissed.

The black and white tom struggled. Darkshadow backed off so he could open his mouth and breathe. It took him a moment to recognize who had attacked him. When he did, his eyes widened and he lowered his body to the ground submissively. "Secret! I didn't know you were here."

"Get up, Mutt. My being here isn't the issue at hand. Your presence is the one I was asking about," Darkshadow growled.

"Yes, of course! See, I…I…"

"Spit it out or I'll go in and get it myself." Darkshadow flexed his claws, then noticed how beaten up Mutt was. "What the hell happened to you? Where's the rest of the band?"

"I left the band, like you did." Mutt averted his eyes.

Darkshadow noticed the heavily bleeding wound on Mutt's shoulder. "Well, you clearly didn't leave on good terms. What happened?"

"They…They wanted to…They wanted me to…I couldn't! I just couldn't! She was pregnant! You wouldn't have done it. She wouldn't have made you do it. I couldn't…It was so senseless." Mutt was close to sobbing.

"What is it that was so senseless?"

"She was pregnant! And she was going to make me…She wouldn't have made you do it. You wouldn't kill kits."

"She...?" Darkshadow's eyes grew wide. "You aren't talking about…"

Mutt nodded. "You mean you didn't know?"

Darkshadow shook his head. "No, I…How?"

Mutt shrugged. "It could have been anyone, I guess. She's hardly monogamous. You know that."

"I'm very well aware. But why?"

"She said she couldn't have kits and be leader. We didn't understand. We told her kits didn't matter, but she wouldn't listen. She made us kidnap pregnant housecats to experiment on. She wanted to find the safest way for us to…" Mutt sank down and covered his face with his paws. "They'd scream so much! It was almost something we could have expected from you."

That wasn't a compliment…anymore. Darkshadow's eyes were wide with horror as he placed a paw on the shaking tom's shoulder.

"But you'd never kill kits. And when she finally found a method she liked, she wanted me to do it because she said I was the one she most trusted to not go too far and fuck her up. But when she laid down and I saw her swollen stomach all exposed, I thought, _'There's kits in there and I'm about to kill them.'_ And I couldn't do it. I begged her not to do it or just not make me do it. She got so angry. She said you would have done it. Then she went on about how she missed you and your claws and your…um…Well, she missed you. Then she said if I couldn't do it, she'd have to get someone else. She called Buck over."

"She trusted _him_ with that? That brute? He'd have killed her in two blows, the clumsy oaf!" Darkshadow hissed.

"I know! I warned her, but she said he just needed practice. So she told him to beat me as much as possible without killing me. As you can see, he succeeded. So she laid down again and let him get started on her. She was so quiet the whole time. After the housecats had screamed so much, I didn't understand how she could be so quiet. I thought, _'She can't be mortal. She must be some kind of monster.'_ I know you don't like calling anyone that, but if you'd have seen her… Then…Oh Creator…" Mutt was shaking even harder, now.

"What? What happened?" Darkshadow insisted.

"Buck hit her in this one place on her stomach, and she let out this scream like I never heard before. Well, I guess…Have you ever heard a rabbit scream?"

Darkshadow shook his head.

"It's bone-chilling. That's what her scream was like. Then she started bleeding. So much blood. And I knew what was coming. We all did. We'd seen it so many times before. Her body was evacuating the dead kits. Lilith, she was there to pull them out. They already had fur, Secret! She just pulled them out and tossed them into a pile. Four of them. So bloody you couldn't even see their colors, but their faces…Secret, their eyes were scrunched shut and their mouths were open! Lilith said it was just because they were limp and they obviously couldn't hold their jaws shut and all kits' eyes are scrunched, but I knew the truth. I knew they were screaming because, if we'd just waited maybe a couple of weeks, she would have given birth. They were alive enough to not want to die. They were alive enough to feel it, I know they were!

"When Cara stopped trembling and bleeding, she got up and, well, someone had to help her. She couldn't walk on her own after that. I don't remember who did it. I was throwing up. But she got over to the pile of her little kits that she'd had murdered and she…" Mutt looked like he was going to vomit, but he swallowed it down, "She ate them. Just ate them like they were scraps of kill. And when she was done, she turned around and cut Buck's throat. I figure she would have done the same to me if I'd gone through with it. Or maybe she just thought Buck enjoyed it too much. I don't know. He was smiling while he did it. What if they'd been his? No, they couldn't have been. She was promiscuous, but she'd never lay with him. He looked so surprised when she killed him, though. And she was smiling afterward, all proud of herself and face covered in her kits' blood."

"Sweet Creator, Cara, what have you done?" Darkshadow whispered.

"That's what I said. I said she'd gone crazy now that you were gone and I couldn't take it. I told her I wanted out. She laughed in my face and told me I'd have to wait until she'd gathered her strength back up. And then she passed out right in front of me. While she was out, the rest of the band called me a coward and ganged up on me. They said you had privileges because you were special, but I wasn't so I was just leaving out of cowardice and I didn't deserve to live. They didn't kill me, but they came close.

"When Cara woke up, she bit me out and I ran."

"How long ago did his happen?" Darkshadow asked.

"A few days ago. I haven't eaten since. My stomach couldn't handle it, but I'm getting too weak now. My wound hasn't been able to heal. That's why I, uh, you know." Mutt gestured to the scraps of meat left from what had once been a mouse and a sparrow. Darkshadow disregarded it. He'd caught plenty. "Where are you living? Someone said something about forest cats."

"I live with one of the forest clans. This is where I grew up." Darkshadow smiled as he regarded the forest, but it disappeared when his eyes rested back on Mutt.

Mutt looked around in wonder. "So this is where the Shadow Cats live?"

"ShadowClan," Darkshadow corrected him.

"Did they give you a new name? I hear they have special names, here."

Darkshadow nodded.

Mutt suddenly collapsed into a fit of coughing. Small droplets of blood coated his lips and seeped from his nose. "They sure fucked me up," he rasped. His eyes brightened, suddenly. "Hey, isn't this where you learned about healing? You could take me to the healer! Maybe he could help me. He would, wouldn't he?"

"Yes, of course he would. But it's a long way to camp. I'm going to give you something that will help you make the trip, ok?"

"I could probably make it. I've made it this far," Mutt said with a weak smile.

"It'll make you more comfortable. It's the least I can do. You're a good cat." Darkshadow flashed him a smile.

"Well, heh, if you insist. A bit of pain killer wouldn't be too bad."

Darkshadow nodded and began looking around at the bushes. "Ah, here we go."

Mutt narrowed his eyes. "I've never seen you use this herb before."

"It's not very common outside the forest, but it's the best. It'll take away the pain and help kill infection."

"How many should I eat?"

"Five should do it. It'll work fast." Darkshadow watched as Mutt leaned forward and picked one red berry at a time. He'd only consumed four before his legs became weak and Darkshadow stopped him from falling.

"What's happening?" Mutt sounded frightened.

"It's only temporary. Here, only one more. Trust me."

Mutt gave a shaky smile. "I always trusted you, Secret. That's why I wanted to find you." He accepted the last berry and swallowed it. His breathing slowed. "You're right, Secret, the pain is going away." His eyes began to close. "I'm suddenly very tired. Is that normal?"

"Yeah." Darkshadow kept his voice steady.

"I know we should return to your camp, but can I rest here for a moment?"

"Take all the time you need." Darkshadow helped Mutt sink to the ground gently.

"Thanks, Secret. You're the best." Mutt's eyes were closed and his voice was softer than ever.

"You're better than I am, Mutt. You're brave and trustworthy and good-natured. And I'm sorry." Darkshadow watched Mutt's chest grow still. He sighed and hung his head. He felt Darkstripe begin to tug at his conscious, but he warned him away. He was in no mood for his alter-ego's comments.

He hoisted Mutt's small body onto his back and carried him to a small den concealed in the tangled roots of a tree and buried him. "I'm truly sorry, my friend," he said softly before leaving.

After cleaning up the evidence of Mutt's final meal, it was less than a quarter mile back to the camp. In that quarter mile, he gathered up the rest of the prey he'd caught. No one paid attention when he dropped his prey onto the pile. An improvement from the time he was an apprentice. Perhaps rescuing Wildpaw did count for something. Darkshadow was no longer hungry.

He laid in seclusion on the edge of the camp until Mudriver and Thundertail returned from their patrol. They greeted him exuberantly, but immediately picked up on his down mood.

"Wassa matter, buddy?" Mudriver asked.

"Oh, I'm just nervous about my first night in the warriors' den. I doubt anyone here is too excited about sharing a den with me," Darkshadow lied.

"Yeah, well, fuck them," Thundertail said with a shrug.

"Yeah. They ought to know you're trustworthy by now," Mudriver added.

Darkshadow smiled.

"_Trustworthy. Riiiiiiiiight."_

"_Shut up! It had to be done."_

"_No, no, of course it did. I'm sure your little follower understands perfectly. After all, you've murdered so many others. What's one more? And it's not like he had a clean record, either."_

"_I made it as easy as I could. Three would have been enough to kill him, but it would have been slow. Same as if I'd done it myself."_

"_And this way you didn't get your delicate paws dirty."_

"_It wasn't like that!" _Darkshadow shouted.

"_Whatever you say, Princey."_

"_Since when are you the voice of morality?" _Darkshadow snapped.

"_Me? I'm no voice of morality. I have no morals. Here I was thinking that was your job."_

"_There was nothing else I could do!"_

"_I understand. Hey, I'm not saying you had another choice. Like I said, morality's your job. You only had one option."_

"_Right." _Darkshadow was glad to let the subject drop.

"…_And on the bright side, now there's no one around to spill all your dirty little secrets."_

Darkshadow fought the urge to hiss out loud as he crammed Darkstripe away before the demon could torment him any longer.

~X~

"Ok, so at least tell me one thing."

Windlegs looked over at Thicketclaw. "Alright."

"What on Earth do you see in him?"

Windlegs sighed and shook her head.

"It's a legitimate question!" Thicketclaw insisted. "I'm trying to understand this, really I am, but you're going to have to help me, here."

"What is there to not see?"

"I can name quite a few things. Looks, for one."

Windlegs quirked an eyebrow at her friend. "You, of all people, are complaining about looks?"

Thicketclaw looked confused. "What?"

Windlegs just shrugged. "Oh, nothing, never mind." She crouched down and began stalking a mouse a few feet ahead.

When Windlegs returned with her prey, Thicketclaw hadn't dropped the conversation. "What do you mean about me and looks?"

Windlegs sighed as she buried the mouse. "It's nothing, Thicketclaw, just drop it."

"No! No, I will not drop it. You can pull that innocent act with everyone else and have them melting at your paws, but not me, missy, I know you too well. Now tell me what you meant," the brown she-cat insisted.

Windlegs laughed. "Ok, fine. You were mates with a calico tom, Thicketclaw. You really shouldn't be judging appearance."

"He was unique!" Thicketclaw defended.

"I never said he wasn't. He was my friend, too, remember? But that doesn't nullify the fact that he looked like a female. Even he admitted it, once!" She chuckled at the memory.

"At least he still looked good."

"Oh yeah, really good. Downright pretty! Is that why you liked him so much? Something about you we should know?" Windlegs nudged Thicketclaw with her shoulder.

Thicketclaw batted her away, playfully. "Oh shut up. At least he wasn't covered in scars."

"I like the scars. They give him a kind of dangerous look." Windlegs rolled her shoulders.

"He is dangerous."

Windlegs frowned at Thicketclaw's sudden serious tone. "Yeah, well so am I."

"Windlegs, I'm serious."

"So I gathered. You're almost as bad as my brother. I can handle myself." Windlegs stopped and began sniffing around for prey. Suddenly, she stopped. "Thicketclaw, come here."

"Hey, you can't just change the subject on me. We're having an important conversation he–"

"Would you just shut up and come here! This is more important right now. I smell a rogue," Windlegs said impatiently.

"What? Really?" Thicketclaw rushed to Windlegs's side. "Great StarClan, you're right."

"Of course I'm right. Did you really think I'd just say that to change the subject?" Before Thicketclaw could answer, Windlegs continued, "Let's just track this guy. The scent is a couple of hours old. Maybe he was just passing through."

"There's blood," Thicketclaw pointed out.

"Then let's make sure he hasn't collapsed somewhere."

Windlegs and Thicketclaw set out tracking the rogue's scent. The blood trail never thinned. Whoever it was, they were seriously injured. The blood pooled in one area, but it looked like someone had tried to scratch it away. The trail all but disappeared and the she-cats had a tough time picking it back up. Thicketclaw found it almost by accident next to a small bush.

"There're death berries on this bush. You don't think he might have tried to eat these, do you?" Thicketclaw asked.

"If he did, there should be a body."

"Maybe he only ate one and felt sick," Thicketclaw suggested.

Windlegs looked around the area and found a few specks of blood on the tall grass. "If he did manage to walk away, he probably didn't get far." She regarded the trail in the grass. "Let's go. He probably needs help."

With great difficulty, they managed to wind their way through the grass.

"Is it just me, or does it seem like, once he got to the bush, he put an awful lot of energy into staying hidden?"

Windlegs nodded. "It's definitely odd."

The trail all but disappeared again when they breeched the grass. After some searching, Windlegs found a small hollow in the roots of a tree. But she didn't smell the rogue, anymore. The hollow was filled with a scent she knew very well. A scent she loved. Without calling to Thicketclaw, she crawled into the cramped space. The dirt under her paws was soft, like it had been freshly disturbed. Holding her breath, she began to slowly dig.

"There you are, Windlegs. What're you doing in…?" Thicketclaw trailed off when she saw Windlegs uncover a patch of fur. "What's that?"

Windlegs uncovered enough of the fur to get a good grip and began to pull. Thicketclaw wanted to help, but the den was too small for both of them. After straining for a while, Windlegs managed to win the tug-of-war with the ground and pulled the thing free. Thicketclaw gave her room to back out and helped her tug the dirty being the rest of the way into the light. Thicketclaw gasped at the sight and backed up a step.

Windlegs's eyes were wide. "I think we found our rogue."

Even under the layer of dirt, the bloody wounds were obvious all over the body. It was a shocking sight. Not quite as shocking as another recent corpse, but it was enough to make Thicketclaw turn away.

"Bodies don't bury themselves, Windlegs. We have to tell Blackstar."

"No!" Windlegs said too loud. Taking a deep breath, she continued in a calmer voice. "Help me bury him, again. We aren't going to tell anyone, yet."

"What? Why not?" Thicketclaw took in Windlegs's haunted expression. Her nose picked up on the scent filling the hollow. "You think Darkshadow had something to do with this, don't you?"

"Just give me a chance to talk to him?"

"Talk to him? What will you say? 'Hey, Darkshadow, have you been beating rogues to death recently?'"

"Maybe there's a good reason for this. Maybe he just found the body and buried it. Maybe he's already told Blackstar."

"That's a lot of 'maybe's."

"All I'm saying is we don't have all the facts. There could be a perfectly reasonable explanation for this. Please, Thicketclaw, I'm asking you as a friend: Don't say anything. Let me talk to him," Windlegs implored.

After a pause, Thicketclaw relented. "I won't say anything. But there better be an explanation."

Windlegs affectionately nuzzled Thicketclaw's shoulder. "Thank you."

"Whatever let's just get this thing buried before dark. It's creeping me out."

Windlegs gave her a comforting smile, knowing the body was doing more than creeping her friend out. Not wanting to dig up anymore bad memories, she pulled the body back into the hollow and began burying it.

_Please, StarClan, _she prayed as she finished covering the corpse, _let there be an explanation._

~X~

Darkshadow tossed and turned in his nest. It wasn't uncomfortable. Mudriver and Thundertail had built it perfectly and situated it near theirs by the far wall of the den. He didn't mind being flanked by the wall and his friends. He wasn't too close to them that he felt overheated and he was far enough from the wall that he wasn't getting a chill. The problem came from the fact that he was sleeping in a den at all. He'd become so used to sleeping outside, it was difficult to convert back. That, and he hadn't spent much time sleeping in dens when he was living in ShadowClan the first time, anyway. Snaketail made sleep difficult most of the time in the nursery and it was so large compared to his tiny body he might as well have been outside. He'd spent a lot of his apprenticeship sleeping outside as well. Unless it was raining, he'd been spending his nights outside until Tigerstripe left.

It was strange. He'd been expecting his discomfort to come from the negative feelings of the other warriors at sharing a den with him, but, while there had been a few hesitations, no one said anything about it. No one had even moved their nests away. Even Tigerstripe stayed quiet about the arrangement. Windlegs had avoided him more than the orange tabby had, which he didn't understand. She was acting so strangely. Thinking about her wasn't helping him relax.

Finally giving up, Darkshadow stood and carefully weaved his way between the nests to leave the den. A fresh blast of air filled his lungs as soon as he stepped out. He hadn't even noticed feeling stifled until this moment. Littlecloud's den was smaller than the warriors' den, but there was a sky-light that was only covered in the rain to ensure a fresh-air flow to the patient. Darkshadow looked up at the stars. They didn't make him feel small like it did the rogues, and it didn't make him feel watched over like it did the forest cats. Looking up into the sky and knowing there was no end made him feel limitless. It made him feel like there was no end to anything, even life.

But there was an end to life, all life. Whether by murder or accident or age, everyone and everything died. Old or young. He would die.

Darkshadow suddenly felt very tired. He considered just falling asleep outside, but that wouldn't help promote his unity to the clan. With a final deep breath, he slipped back into the den and to his nest.

He didn't see or even feel the pair of blue-green eyes watching him the entire time…

**When I first created Speckledthorn, he was an outcast like Darkshadow. When I decided to make him friends with Tigerstripe instead, all the jokes I wanted to make about the fact that he looks like a girl were tossed out. But I resurrected the idea for this chapter because I thought it made a good counter-argument for Thicketclaw bringing up the fact that Darkshadow's scars make him less than attractive to some. Me, I like scars, but to each their own.**


	37. Chapter 36

**Cats met in this chapter:**

**Brightpaw- light-gray tabby she-cat. Daughter of Dawnlegs and Tigerstripe. Mentored by Nightshade. RiverClan apprentice**

**Sunpaw- bright-orange tabby tom. Son of Dawnlegs and Tigerstripe. Mentored by Leopardstar. RiverClan apprentice.**

_At least he wasn't running this time. He'd learned to stay and fight. Unfortunately, now was not the time to employ that lesson. But how could he have known? It had seemed so simple. He hadn't thought about it. Hadn't thought about it until the blood began to flow and the bodies began to scatter. Teeth and fur and screams and trying to find a way to help, but there was no way._

_Then he was feeling that pain. Jaws sinking into his shoulders, lifting him up, shaking him. Was he screaming too, now? He was released, hit the ground, tried to scramble away. He didn't move fast enough. He was in the jaws again. He was going to die. So much pain._

'_Secret!'_

_Who was calling him? Where was the voice coming from? He was released again and this time he wasn't too slow. He spun around, scratched. He couldn't run away now. He lost his chance. It had seemed so easy. His next lesson would be to pick his battles._

'_Run, Secret!'_

_No. He couldn't. The slaughter was continuing around him. He still heard the screams echoing. So loud in his head. Then he was deafened. The roar was louder than thunder. What was this monster creature? It couldn't be natural._

'_Secret, give up!'_

_Not yet! He could do this. This thing had to pay. Blood pooled around his paws. He would fix this. He would save them or avenge them or whatever it was that needed to be done. He slashed his claws again and the creature disappeared. He'd won…kind of._

_The casualty rate was enormous. Mangled bodies were everywhere. How did one creature cause so much destruction? Looking around, he was reminded of another nightmare. One where he showered in the blood of innocents he'd slaughtered. But he hadn't murdered these cats, had he? No. It was an accident. One mistake. His fault._

_Murderer._

'_Secret!'_

_Someone calling him. Someone alive. The dead didn't call names. Looking around in the mass of blood and fur, there he was. The one survivor. The one he'd saved._

'_Mutt.'_

_A very happy, very thankful black and white tom raced up to him. He was injured, limping, but he was going to pay his respects to his savior._

'_Thank you! Thank you so much! You saved me!'_

'_The others are dead.'_

'_It was an accident. You did everything you could. You saved me.'_

'_I saved you.'_

_His claws shot out and he cut the tom's throat. Confusion and betrayal contorted the face over the spurts of blood._

'_I'm sorry.'_

_He turned away from the body collapsed at his paws. He couldn't stand to look at it. There was a rustle behind him. An angry, hate-filled voice._

'_No you're not. You've never been sorry. You'll never be sorry. You're a monster.'_

_He was standing. How? He was dead. His head hung at an awkward angle and blood oozed from his lips as he spoke._

'_You're a monster!'_

_The other mangled bodies began to rise. Their broken bones made them move awkwardly as they crept toward him. Others emerged from the bushes around them. Others that hadn't been in the clearing before. Others that he'd killed._

'_Monster!'_

_Others that weren't accidents. And was he sorry for them? Was he sorry for the murders he'd committed on purpose?_

_No._

'_Monster!'_

_They closed in on him, filled with rage. And he didn't fight back. They wanted to kill him. He was going to die. Their screams of hatred and pain filled his ears, deafening him again._

Darkshadow awoke with a start. The same nightmare had been haunting him for days. Ever since…

He usually woke up with the phantom shouts ringing in his ears, but this morning the shouts were real. He quickly made his way out of the den and into the bright sunshine. How long had he been allowed to sleep?

"Blackstar!" Thicketclaw was shouting as the rest of her patrol filtered in behind her. Some of them were injured. "Blackstar!"

Blackstar rushed over. "What the hell happened?"

"Foxes! A pair of them in the forest! They attacked us!" Thicketclaw explained hurriedly.

The cats nearby immediately began to murmur among themselves. Darkshadow felt their anxiety at the obvious danger. It interfered with his own calculating response.

"What do we do?" someone called.

"We get rid of them," Darkshadow said casually. The warriors looked at him. He lowered his head respectfully and approached Blackstar. "Send me with a band of a few strong warriors and I'll rid the forest of these menaces. I've had...practice."

"You sure you can handle it?" Blackstar asked.

"I know I can."

Blackstar nodded. "I'll accompany you."

"I suggest we bring Tigerstripe, Mudriver, and Thundertail as well. They're some of the strongest warriors. More firepower, smaller group."

"I agree. You three, let's go." The named warriors stepped forward.

Windlegs pushed her way through the crowd. "I'm coming, too."

"No you're not," Darkshadow replied.

"That's not your decision. And I don't care what any of you say, I'm going."

"Much as I hate to admit it, I agree with Darkshadow. I don't want you going, either," Tigerstripe said.

Windlegs hissed at him. "I don't give a fuck what you want."

"You're staying and that's that!" Darkshadow snapped.

"Why?" Windlegs challenged.

"Because I said so!"

"Well how about I cut out your tongue? Then you won't be able to say a thing."

"Windlegs–"

"Fuck off, Tigerstripe, or I'll slice you up next!"

"We don't need you!"

"Oh no? Do you forget that I kicked your ass when you were an apprentice? I could do it again right now!"

"I bet you couldn't."

"I'm tempted to take you up on that, smartass."

"Just one more thing to add to the list of stupid things you want to do. You're going to get yourself killed."

"At least I'll be able to take you with me."

"Windlegs?"

"Don't you fucking start, too, Mudriver!"

Mudriver shrank back slightly. "Whoa, there. I'm on your side on this."

"You are?" Windlegs looked happy.

"You are?" Tigerstripe and Darkshadow stared at him in shock.

"Mudriver, what are you talking about?" Darkshadow demanded.

"She's a great fighter and stronger than either of you have ever given her credit for. We could use her in this."

"I don't want her to go," Tigerstripe growled.

"Well I do and since I'm the leader my opinion is the only one that matters. The rest of you can either shut the fuck up or stay here. Let's go, Windlegs."

Windlegs shot Darkshadow and Tigerstripe a proud look and followed Blackstar out of the camp. Thundertail and Mudriver followed close behind. Darkshadow and Tigerstripe glared at each other before following.

As they set out to pick up the scent of the foxes, Darkshadow fell into step beside Windlegs. "You know you could get yourself killed, right?" he whispered.

"I stand by what I said back in camp," Windlegs huffed, not looking at him.

"What is wrong with you?" Darkshadow demanded.

Now Windlegs turned to him. "What are you talking about?"

"You've been cold to me since I got back and I can understand that, but over the past few days, you've been even worse. And now this? Are you actually going out of your way to make me insane?"

Windlegs tossed her head and looked forward again. "I don't know what you're talking about. So, what's your master plan for when we find these things?"

"Kill them." Darkshadow seemed confused that she didn't know.

"That's always your answer, isn't it? Something goes against you: kill it."

"What? These things attacked our clanmates. You want to just sit down and have a chat with them? And what do you mean killing is my answer to everything? What do you know about the way I do things?"

Windlegs glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. "Maybe I know more than you think."

Darkshadow shook his head. Either he was insane, or Windlegs was; and with the way things were going, he was going to have to vote for Windlegs. He sped up and fell into step beside Blackstar instead to help track. He shut his eyes and the forest came to life with bright colors. Carefully, he picked out the life signature of a fox.

_Fox. Two. Fully grown. Healthy. One male. One female. Aggressive._

"This way," he told Blackstar and took the lead following the path.

When they were close to the area they assumed the foxes were using as a den, Blackstar stopped the group. "We'll split them up. Darkshadow, Tigerstripe, and I will take the male. He'll require brute force. Mudriver, Thundertail, Windlegs take the female. She'll be smaller but she'll be quick and unafraid to bite. Don't let her get those teeth in you."

"You can't just snap a fox's neck. You'll have to bleed them," Darkshadow added.

Blackstar nodded. "I'll lure them out. Stay hidden until they start getting into a fighting mood. If they run, we'll never catch them and they'll come back with a vengeance. If they have a den, they think this is their territory. They're probably planning to den for pups. They won't give this place up."

The others confirmed their understanding and Blackstar slipped out of the bushes to the mouth of the den. Casting a glance at his warriors over his shoulder, Blackstar slipped in. Growls and yips began to echo out of the den. Moments later, Blackstar bolted out of the den, two orange creatures on his heels. He spun around to face them as soon as they were in the open and the rest of the band rushed down to take down their chosen enemy.

Tigerstripe and Darkshadow latched onto the male's left side, hauling him to the ground. Blackstar tried to jump on his head to keep him down, but he shook the toms away and stood. He was a heavy beast, lacking the normal elegance most foxes possessed, but he was no less menacing. He snapped his jaws angrily at the cats, trying to get past them to his vixen, but the toms held him back. Darkshadow lunged forward and bit his forepaw. He yelped and reared onto his hind legs. With his stomach exposed, Blackstar and Tigerstripe had a chance to rush forward and bite into the soft belly. Darkshadow released his paw and the tod dropped back onto all fours. He laid down, trying to crush the cats biting him. Yelping again, he rolled over several times. Darkshadow jumped on his head while he was on his back and Tigerstripe and Blackstar set to work trying to rip through the thick layer of fur to get to the delicate flesh beneath.

The vixen growled angrily at the assault on her mate, but seemed prepared to choose retreat. She wasn't given the chance. Windlegs and the sibling surrounded her, slashing at her legs. Finally deciding retreat would not be an option, she began snapping at the cats around her. She was quicker than the male, but smaller as Blackstar had said. Windlegs slashed at her nose, narrowly missing getting her paw bitten off by the sharp teeth. Thundertail batted at the vixen's bushy tail, causing her to spin around. Mudriver jumped on her back, biting into her shoulders with the intent of wrestling her to the ground. The vixen was small, but strong. She regained her balance and shook hard, trying to dislodge her attacker. The she-cats scratched at bit at her legs. She stumbled and they weaved underneath her, tripping her. She fell to the ground hard and all three were upon her. She rolled, letting out high-pitched whines. The cats were trapped beneath her, but she couldn't get back on her feet. Mudriver worked himself free first and clawed at her lower jaw. She snapped at him. The she-cats worked their way free and jumped on her chest. She jerked free from them and regained her paws. She was bloody, but not mortally wounded. The cats came at her in another wave.

The tod's injuries were more extensive. He'd managed to wrestle himself free from the toms, but not before they'd had a chance to wound his stomach beyond repair. He was shaky on his paws, but still filled with the drive to protect his mate. He jumped over the toms, raining them with blood, and grabbed the white she-cat biting into his vixen's throat. He shook her by the scruff violently and threw her before the toms caught up with him and took him down. They bit at his neck and shoulders. He tried to shake them off, but was too weak.

The vixen knew her tod was doomed. The white she-cat did not come back from where she'd been thrown and, with only two cats on her now, she was able to break free. She stopped trying to fight and instead turned and ran, speeding through the forest with ease. The black and grey cats chased her, but she soon outpaced them. She did not stop running until she was past the moor, brimming with fury at the loss of her mate but more concerned with her injuries. She limped away to find a place to rest and heal.

Thundertail and Mudriver returned to the place where the foxes had denned. The tod was dead, having bled out shortly after his mate fled. Darkshadow, Blackstar, and Tigerstripe were a few feet away tending to a very annoyed Windlegs.

"Would you quit mothering me, you stupid toms? I told you I'm fine. I just got dizzy is all!"

"I told you not to come," Darkshadow snapped.

"You could have been killed," Tigerstripe added.

"Both of you shut up and give her some air! She's got a little bite, nothing life-threatening, and she didn't hit her head. She's perfectly fine." Blackstar shoved the younger toms away with annoyance.

"We lost the female," Thundertail said, amused by the scene in front of her.

"I told you you'd never catch a fox if it ran. That's no big deal, though. With her mate gone, she won't be very inclined to return. If she finds another one, he'll probably take her to his own territory to den," Blackstar said.

"So was anyone injured?" Mudriver asked.

"Windlegs was," Tigerstripe said.

"I was not! Would you shut up?" Windlegs shoved past her brother. "I thought you were males, but now I'm starting to wonder."

Thundertail laughed while Darkshadow and Tigerstripe looked sheepish. "At least they're finally getting along."

Tigerstripe and Darkshadow looked at each other, glared, and pointedly moved away from each other.

"We're all fine, which will make Littlecloud very happy. Now, let's go back to camp." Blackstar led the band away from the fox corpse.

Darkshadow slid beside Windlegs.

"If you're here to ask me if I need help getting back to camp, I'll rip what's left of your ears off and shove them down your throat," she hissed.

"I'm sorry."

Windlegs raised an eyebrow. "Keep going."

"I wasn't being fair before. In fact, I was being stupid. I was worried about you, but I have no reason to be. You're perfectly capable of taking care of yourself and I have to trust you."

There was a pause…then Windlegs burst out laughing.

Darkshadow gave her a confused look.

"I'm…I'm sorry," she panted. The rest of the band turned to give her strange looks. "You guys go on ahead. I'm going to talk to Darkshadow," she told them. Shrugging, Blackstar continued to lead the way back to the camp. Tigerstripe hesitated, but a sharp glare from Windlegs sent him after his leader.

"So, you wanna tell me what's so funny? I expected you to still be pissed or something."

Windlegs continued to laugh, but it was beginning to sound nervous and then hysterical.

"Hey, would you calm down? I'm starting to consider worrying again."

"It's just…Oh StarClan…You're here talking about not trusting _me_ and here I am wondering just how much I can trust _you_. It's so funny and you don't even understand why, yet!"

"Um, you're right, I don't. You don't think you can trust me?"

"I don't know!"

"Why?" Darkshadow sounded a little hurt.

Windlegs took a deep breath and regained her composure. Turning back to Darkshadow, suddenly very serious, she kept her voice low. "Because I found the mangled body of a rogue buried on the territory the other day and it smelled like you."

Darkshadow's eyes became wide. "Oh…"

"Yeah, 'oh'. So, you wanna explain that to me?"

Darkshadow found himself missing Windlegs's hysterical laughing. "There's nothing to explain."

"Don't lie to me, Darkshadow. Don't you dare fucking lie to me. I've had enough of your lies to last me a lifetime," Windlegs growled.

Darkshadow sighed. "You're right, you have. You deserve the truth."

"Are you going to give it to me? Did you know this cat?"

"Yeah, I knew him." Darkshadow met Windlegs's eyes. "And I killed him."

"Why?"

"He was dangerous. I met him when I was out in the rogue territories. He had a nasty habit of killing."

"That's no surprise. So you killed him first?"

"I had to. If I'd let him go or tried to chase him off, he'd have just come back and then who knows what could have happened."

"ShadowClan warriors can handle themselves."

"He was a kit-killer, Windlegs. He would have gone after the apprentices. Warriors might have stood a chance, but not apprentices. I didn't get a chance to kill him out there, but I wasn't going to let him go now that he'd come here." Darkshadow was a little disturbed at how easy it was to lie to Windlegs's face, but didn't dwell on it.

"You don't have any injuries."

"What?"

"If you fought him, and he was as good as you say, how did you get away without any injuries?"

Darkshadow shrugged. "Luck and I'm a better fighter. He got a few hits in, but nothing major. I'd healed by the next day. He put up a hell of a fight, though. You probably just didn't notice because I still have scabs from the rats and you haven't gotten very close to me recently."

Windlegs looked at her paws for a moment. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"I was worried. I haven't been back for very long. I've been out of commission most of the time. The first day I get back out there and I end up killing someone again. You really think that'll look good to the rest of the clan? Of course, it'll probably look worse now that I've hidden it from them. I'm such an idiot." Darkshadow hung his head and turned in the direction of the camp. "Come on, let's go back and I'll do what I should have done."

"You don't have to," Windlegs said.

Darkshadow smirked for a split second before putting a confused look on and turning back to her. "But it's bad to keep secrets from the clan."

Windlegs stepped up beside him. "In this case, what they don't know won't hurt them. You did the right thing, I guess. It's not like there was much choice to be had. Besides, you're right, it'll look pretty bad to tell them after you've kept it a secret for this long. We'll just keep it between us."

Darkshadow smiled and pressed against her flank. His face grew a little more serious. "Hey, Windlegs, what did you do with the body?"

"I reburied it where I found it."

"You didn't tell anyone else about it, did you?"

"No." It wasn't technically a lie. She hadn't told anyone about it. Thicketclaw saw for herself.

"Good."

They walked back to the camp side-by-side in silence, each feeling guilty in their own right.

~X~

Brightpaw raced across RiverClan camp, nearly tackling her brother to the ground in her excitement. "Sunpaw, you'll never believe the news!" she exclaimed.

"Try me," the orange tabby said, struggling to pull free of his sister's hold.

"Nightshade says we'll probably get to go to the gathering!" Brightpaw squealed with uncontained excitement.

"I can believe that. Leopardstar told me the same thing." Sunpaw shook dirt from his fur.

"She did?" Brightpaw looked disappointed, but quickly readopted her natural cheeriness. "Aren't you excited?"

"Can't wait," Sunpaw said flatly.

Brightpaw frowned. "You don't sound excited. How come you never get excited?"

"You get excited enough for both of us."

Brightpaw suddenly looked as though she'd had the greatest idea in the world. "I'm going to tell Mom! She'll be so happy!"

"I don't think we're supposed to…" But Brightpaw was already racing across the camp, again. Sunpaw sighed and sat down to groom himself.

Brightpaw reached her mother's side within seconds. Dawnlegs was busy talking to Nightshade, but Brightpaw didn't have the patience to wait.

"Mom! Mom!"

"Just a minute, Brightpaw," Dawnlegs said.

Brightpaw clamped her mouth shut and paced impatiently a couple of times. "Mom!"

"Hold on."

"But, Mom, I have something important to tell you!"

"It can wait."

"No it can't!" Brightpaw said quietly, but contained herself enough to stop interrupting.

Dawnlegs and Nightshade shared an amused look before she finally turned to her daughter. "Ok, sweetie, what is it?"

"I'm going to the gathering!" Brightpaw's excitement literally exploded and she jumped high enough that her head was over the two older she-cats. When she landed, she was panting from the effort of holding back for so long.

"I know. Nightshade just told me."

Dawnlegs gaped at her mentor. "You told her? Why is everyone telling everyone? I wanted to tell! First Sunpaw, now you. And is no one as excited as I am?"

"I don't think anyone has the energy to be as excited as you are," Dawnlegs laughed.

"I didn't make any promises, Brightpaw. I just said it was likely," Nightshade said.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. This is going to be so much fun! I get to meet the other clans! There'll be so many cats and they'll know so much stuff…" Brightpaw trailed off. She glanced up at her mother and mentor, then said, "I'm going to go see if Sunpaw wants to go hunting with me. Burn off some of this energy, you know?" She took off back to the apprentices' den.

"Be sure not to wear yourself out or you won't have enough energy to stay up tonight," Nightshade called.

"Oh yes she will," Dawnlegs said. "I always did."

"She's a lot like you," Nightshade said.

Dawnlegs got a far-away look in her eyes. "A lot like her father, too…" She turned to her best friend. "You think he'll be there tonight?"

"He always is."

"But…but I can't introduce them. Not really. What if Brightpaw puts it together? Sunpaw looks so much like him."

"There are a lot of orange tabbies in this world," Nightshade offered.

"But not like him." Dawnlegs shook her head.

Nightshade had no response. She didn't see what made Tigerstripe so particularly special like Dawnlegs did, but then, she'd never been in love with him, either. She tried to see Tigerstripe as Dawnlegs did, but it didn't work.

Suddenly, Dawnlegs looked worried. "What if she goes asking around at the gathering? You know how much it means to her. If no one here knows, maybe she'll try asking the other clans."

"But no one else knows, either. There's no one who could tell her aside from the three of us and we won't."

"It's going to hurt him to not be able to say anything." Dawnlegs looked at her paws. Nightshade pressed her nose comfortingly to her shoulder.

Brightpaw barely managed to prevent herself from crashing into Sunpaw again. She had the 'I've just had the best idea in the world' look on her face again, as well. Every time she got an idea, that was her expression.

"Ok, so what did you come up with this time?" Sunpaw asked.

"Do you think someone from one of the other clans would know who our father is?" Brightpaw was practically shaking.

Sunpaw shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe."

Suddenly, Brightpaw's eyes grew wide. Apparently her new idea was even better than the last one. She lowered her voice so Sunpaw almost had to strain to hear. "What if our father is from one of the other clans?"

"You've already had that idea," Sunpaw said.

"But now we can actually find out! Come on, Sunpaw, don't you care at all?"

"Mom says it doesn't matter who our father is." Sunpaw laid down facing away from her.

Brightpaw scrambled over him. "But doesn't it matter to you even a little bit?"

"Not really." Sunpaw rolled over again.

Brightpaw just jumped over him again. "A little bit?"

"No! Brightpaw, we've had this conversation before. I don't care who he is. It doesn't matter. Why do _you_ care so much?"

"Because…Because I just do, ok! I think it matters and if you won't help me then fine! I don't need your help. I'll find him myself." Brightpaw's smile was gone which was the closest she came to looking angry.

Sunpaw sighed. "What makes you so sure he's even in the forest? He could have been a rogue. He could be dead."

"No. I thought about that."

"Of course you did," Sunpaw mumbled.

"He's here. I can feel it."

"Well, good for you. I wish you the best of luck," Sunpaw said half-sincerely.

That evening, Leopardstar announced who would be attending the gathering. Brightpaw couldn't keep herself from whooping when she heard her name. No one gave her a second look. They were used to the excitable she-cat by now.

It was a wonder Brightpaw didn't trip over her own legs with how much she was shaking when she and her brother followed the warriors to four trees. But when they got to the clearing and she saw the mass of cats below her, she froze. There had to be a million cats down there! All bigger than she was! Sunpaw nudge her from behind and she hesitantly followed the clan down into the clearing. Just as they arrived, the bushes on the opposite end rustled and the shadows came to life. Brightpaw almost jumped behind Sunpaw before she realized the shadows were cats. A white tom was leading them and his warriors followed in a massive wave behind, spreading out and integrating themselves with the rest of the cats.

"That's Blackstar, the ShadowClan leader," Sunpaw whispered.

"Wow…"

Sunpaw snickered. Brightpaw had never been at a loss for words before. She looked absolutely stunned by what she saw and Sunpaw had to admit, it was impressive. "You wanna go see the other apprentices?"

Brightpaw appeared to have forgotten her plan to question the other clans. She stayed by her mother's side and followed her to where she was sitting down. She recognized the three cats she'd joined as having come in with ShadowClan. They didn't look frightening in the light. Well, maybe the massive orange tabby was intimidating, but the she-cats looked friendly.

"Who's this?" the white she-cat asked.

Dawnlegs almost looked surprised to find her kits sitting next to her. She looked up and met Tigerstripe's eyes. "These are my kits."

Tigerstripe felt his chest tighten. The little gray tabby was staring up at him with unrestrained wonder and some fear. The orange tabby, like him, was giving him an unreadable expression but watching him just as close as his sister.

"Sunpaw is being mentored by Leopardstar," Dawnlegs was saying to the approval of the rest of the group.

"Hey, Dawnlegs, you're back! And you brought mini-yous!" came the joyful cheer of a gray tom.

Brightpaw liked this new arrival already. His fur was long and silky and flowed with every move he made, but he was cheery like herself and her mother. The black she-cat with him was less boisterous, but still brimming with friendliness. Brightpaw nodded politely as she was introduced to the entire group.

"Why don't you two find the other apprentices?" Dawnlegs suggested.

Sunpaw nodded his agreement and urged Brightpaw to come with him.

Dawnlegs looked among the group and frowned in confusion. "Where's Speckledthorn?"

Thicketclaw's face fell. Windlegs pressed against her comfortingly. Dawnlegs was further confused and looked to the others for some explanation.

"Speckledthorn died the day after the last gathering. Rats," Thundertail offered.

"Oh StarClan, Thicketclaw, I'm so sorry!"

"I'm…dealing," Thicketclaw said softly. She'd been getting better, but being surrounded by cats who didn't know what had happened was different. Having to explain suddenly brought up all the old hurt.

"I feel like we just missed something big," Brightpaw said, looking over her shoulder at the group of adults.

"It's probably none of our business," Sunpaw said.

"He's pretty secretive, but you can tell he's been through a lot," one of ShadowClan's apprentices was saying dramatically to the others.

"Who is?" Brightpaw asked.

The brown and black she-cat turned to her. "Who're you?" she asked.

"I'm Brightpaw and this is my brother Sunpaw who doesn't talk very much but he has a wicked smile." She gestured to Sunpaw whose face was set into something closer to a scowl. "See? He's the life of any party. Who were you talking about before?"

"I'm Wildpaw. This is Snowpaw and Mousepaw and you mean you don't know?" Wildpaw didn't bother to introduce the apprentices from the other clans. They could do it themselves.

"Don't know what?"

"About Darkshadow!" Wildpaw said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world who she'd been talking about.

"Wasn't he the one that was exiled until the last gathering?" Sunpaw asked.

"Whoa, he does talk! He do that often?" Wildpaw asked.

"Do you change the subject often?" Sunpaw shot back.

"Ouch," Wildpaw said.

Sunpaw rolled his eyes.

"Who's Darkshadow? Is he here?" Brightpaw looked around the clearing, trying to find a cat that would appropriately be given such a name.

"What's it to you?" Wildpaw asked.

"He's over there by the bushes," Mousepaw said, nodding in the general direction.

Brightpaw almost missed the dark tabby sitting in the shadows on the edge of the clearing. Most cats were giving him a wide berth. She thought she remembered Thundertail and Mudriver coming from his general direction, but she couldn't be sure and they were still talking to the others. The tabby, Darkshadow, was covered from ears to tail with scars, the most prominent of which being a horrible gash on the shoulder Brightpaw could see along with his shredded ears. And there was something striking about a thin scar across his nose. He seemed to sense he was being watched and his ice-blue eyes flashed over to her. She gasped and looked at her paws at being caught.

Sunpaw followed his sister's gaze and frowned. "I don't like him."

"You don't like anybody," Brightpaw countered. Wildpaw was going on with details about this Darkshadow, but Brightpaw wasn't paying attention. She had to admit, there was something about Darkshadow that repelled her. It wasn't the scars, although they were intimidating. It was something she couldn't name, something her instincts were telling her to avoid. That made her even more curious. The gathering started, but Brightpaw didn't care about that anymore. With everyone focused on the leaders, Brightpaw took her opportunity to creep over to the tabby.

"H-hi," she said softly.

He looked down at her. Something flashed in his eyes, then a wall went up and he was unreadable. "Hello," he said quietly. They were far enough away from the others that their conversation could go unheard.

"So you're Darkshadow?" she asked.

"That's what they call me. What do they call you?"

"Brightpaw." She was too nervous to look him in the eyes and scuffled her paws on the ground, staring at the dirt they stirred up.

"So, Brightpaw, what do you want?"

He was a direct one. "I wanted to ask you a question," she mumbled.

"So are you going to ask me or are you just going to stare at your paws?" She didn't see the amused sparkle in his eyes.

"Well, see, I…I don't really know how to ask it."

"Is it about me?"

Brightpaw shook her head.

Darkshadow was surprised. What could she possibly have to ask of him, then? His eyes flashed over to Tigerstripe. "So what is it I would know that no one else would?"

"It's not that no one else knows. It's that no one else will tell me. And, I mean, I'm not sure you know, either, but you're the first cat from another clan I've talked to without my mother around that might know."

"I'm some first choice," Darkshadow said sarcastically. "I repeat my earlier question: Are you going to ask me this question or keep staring at your paws as if there's something interesting down there?"

Gathering up her courage, Brightpaw lifted her head, looked straight into the blue eyes, and said, "Doyouknowwhomyfatheris?"

Darkshadow blinked, trying to get his brain to catch up with the question. When it did, he felt his heart skip a beat. He glanced over at Tigerstripe again, but caught himself and looked back at the apprentice.

Brightpaw caught him looking at someone, but his gaze returned to her before she could follow it. "You do know!"

Darkshadow hesitated. Oh shit. He couldn't deny it. That would be a lie even too obvious for him. "Ok," he said with little commitment.

"Who is he?" Brightpaw asked, almost as quickly as her first question. She was beginning to shake from excitement.

"Why do you want to know?" Darkshadow asked.

"Because he's my father!" Brightpaw didn't understand why no one else found the explanation so simple. "Wouldn't you prefer to know who your father is?"

_No_, Darkshadow thought. "Who your father is doesn't matter."

Brightpaw frowned. "You sound like my brother. Why won't anyone tell me?" Brightpaw sat down, hanging her head.

Darkshadow felt bad. "Look, your heritage isn't what matters. It's who you are that matters. You don't need a father." _Or even a mother_, he added in his head.

"I know that! I know all of that. I also know that I don't care. I just want to know who my father is. For the sake of knowledge! Is that so wrong?" Brightpaw looked at him pleadingly.

"I'm the last person you should be asking about right and wrong, but I'll say no it's not. Look, I'm sorry, but I can't tell you. I promised I wouldn't."

"Why would you have to promise that? Is he…Does my father not want us?"

"No! It's not that. He just…" Darkshadow sighed. What the hell was he doing in this situation? "He just thinks you'll be better off not knowing who he is."

Brightpaw gave a defeated sigh. "Can you at least tell me one thing?"

"Depends on what it is."

Brightpaw met his gaze steadily this time, her eyes piercing him with all the determined curiosity of a young cat. "Is he from ShadowClan, too?"

Darkshadow broke her gaze and immediately berated himself for his stupidity. He might as well have just screamed 'yes'.

"Brightpaw!" Sunpaw trotted up and blatantly put himself between Darkshadow and his sister. He glanced at Darkshadow, a strange look crossed his face, then he turned back to the she-cat. "The gathering's over. I think it's time we left."

_Just like his father_, Darkshadow thought with some amusement.

"Bye, Darkshadow." Brightpaw's eyes were glinting hopefully. She hadn't gotten the answer to her question, but she'd gotten a clue.

"Bye." Darkshadow wanted to fall in a hole. If she found out, Tigerstripe would kill him. Looking up from the retreating apprentices, he caught Tigerstripe looking at him from across the clearing. The orange tabby didn't look happy. Darkshadow shrugged at him and began to leave four trees.

Tigerstripe hung back as ShadowClan slipped out of the moonlight. No one noticed his absence as he followed at a distance. He could see Mudriver, Thundertail, and Darkshadow several feet ahead of him. Mudriver and Thundertail were chattering away, but Darkshadow's ears kept flicking back. When they crossed into ShadowClan territory, Darkshadow stopped, making Tigerstripe nearly trip when he stopped abruptly to remain far enough back to stay out of sight. Mudriver and Thundertail realized Darkshadow's halt and gave him curious looks.

"You guys go on ahead. I'm not very tired, yet. I'm gonna wander around for a little while," the dark tabby said.

"Ok. Don't be too long, though," Thundertail said. She and Mudriver continued after the clan.

Once they were out of sight, Darkshadow said, "Ok, why are you following me?"

Tigerstripe bolted out of the brush and tackled Darkshadow to the ground. The younger tom obviously didn't expect such an immediate attack and went down quickly.

"Wow, Tigerstripe, I never knew you felt this way about me. I'm flattered and all, but really my heart belongs to–"

"Shut up!" Tigerstripe growled. "What did you say to her?" Darkshadow didn't reply and Tigerstripe cuffed him in the ears. "Answer me!"

"You're contradicting yourself. You told me not to speak."

Tigerstripe hissed. "Don't be a smartass. Tell me what you were talking about!"

"With who?" Tigerstripe snarled and Darkshadow added, "I'm not afraid of you."

"And I'm not in the mood for your games. I swear, Darkshadow, if you told her anything…"

"What'll you do?" Darkshadow challenged. He shoved Tigerstripe off and stood up. His teasing air disappeared. "She wanted to know who her father is. I didn't tell her, but she'll keep trying to figure it out. She already figures it's someone from ShadowClan. She's smart, Tigerstripe." He snorted, "Must have gotten it from her mother."

"Don't you dare tell her."

"Stop trying to sound threatening. It isn't working. And I'm not going to tell her. I gave you my word, remember? I know it doesn't mean anything to you, but it's the best I've got." Darkshadow began to walk away, but suddenly turned back around. "Why do you feel the need to drag me into all of your problems? I've never done shit to you, but you've always got something to bitch at me about. It's very annoying. How about you take responsibility for your own actions, huh? Brightpaw and Sunpaw aren't my doing. You did that all on your own. And you almost started a war over them, you remember that? To tell the truth, I don't know why you insist on keeping them in the dark like this after all the trouble you went through for them. Brightpaw really wants to know who you are and I bet somewhere in that hard shell of his, Sunpaw wants to know, too. Don't you think they deserve to know? And that's coming from _me_. I know firsthand just how much trouble a father can be."

Tigerstripe's scowl deepened all through Darkshadow's speech. "You don't understand. You don't know anything. You just keep your fucking mouth shut and stay away from both of them."

Darkshadow scoffed and rolled his eyes. "Whatever, princess. How about you just stay the fuck away from me?" Darkshadow turned to leave again.

"Wait."

"What do you want now?"

"What were you saying before? About your heart belonging to someone."

Darkshadow raised an eyebrow. "What's it to you?"

Tigerstripe shook his head. He muttered something that sounded like, "Sick of you fucking with my family," and began to push past Darkshadow to return to camp.

Darkshadow stepped up beside him. "If you must know, I have the hots for that aggravating sister of yours, but I think you knew that."

Tigerstripe scowled at him. "How many times do I have to tell you to stay away from her?"

"You can tell me all you want, but it'll never do any good. If she gives me the opportunity, I'm going for it. I think she'll agree that we don't need her bitchy brother's blessing." He took in Tigerstripe's expression. "You keep frowning like that, your face will freeze that way."

"I hate you."

"I'm aware and, despite thinking about it way too much, I still don't understand why. I'm beginning to think you don't know either." Darkshadow pushed past Tigerstripe and slipped into the camp…


	38. Chapter 37

A fierce storm struck the forest. The moon and stars were completely blacked out and the only light came from the occasional flashed of lightening that forced the shadows from their hiding places. The crashes of thunder were deafening, completely drowning out the heavy drumming of the hard, icy rain. The ground was soaked through and soon turned to slippery mud. Misty splashes of water snaked their way into the warriors' den.

The warriors were pressed together, agitated and uncomfortable. They'd known the storm was coming for the past few days by the scent of oncoming rain, the hints of electricity in the air that made their fur stand on end, and the growing unbearable pressure that squeezed their heads and clouded their ears. The miserable conditions had put everyone in negative spirits, raising hostilities around camp. To make matters worse, the roof of the den was leaking. Everyone was pressed together in an attempt to get as far away from the entrance and the leaks as possible and, though none would admit it, for slight comfort as the storm decimated the forest outside. No one cared who they were pressed up against, it was too dark to see anyway and the heavy scent of rain blocked out all else.

Darkshadow, however, was uninterested in being pressed into the thick crowd of bodies. He, and a few other crabby individuals, grew so annoyed that he would occasionally rear up, hissing and batting at those near him, before settling down again and trying to get comfortable when nothing changed. At last, Darkshadow grew so annoyed with those around him and the stifling air in the den that he shoved his way between the warm bodies until he reached the exit. Icy mist stung his lungs when he inhaled the fresh air and it seemed the rain pelted the ground harder as though daring him to leave the safety of the den. Darkshadow was not intimidated. Lowering his head and laying his ears back, he stepped out. A few cats called him back, but he ignored them.

The world outside was in chaos. The wind howled in rage that anyone had dared come out and face it. Darkshadow was nearly pulled off his paws when a gust struck so hard it caused a few raindrops to fall up. The rain was almost as hard as hail and just as cold. Terrible globules hammered down straight through Darkshadow's glossy coat with enough force to blister. Jagged claws of lightening scored across the sky, making the night brighter than the day. The thunder cackled menacingly as the trees spoke to each other in a frantic whisper, reaching out to each other for comfort. Debris flew about hazardously, but Darkshadow paid it no mind.

There were no guards at the camp entrance; they had been called in. No one would be fool enough to attempt an attack in this weather. Only a fool would be out in this weather at all.

The lightening brought the silver stripes on Darkshadow's back to life with each flash before blackness took over once more. When he got out of the clearing, the thick trees and grass hid him from the blazes. Only spots of light could rip their way through to the forest floor below, lighting up the tabby's eyes more silver than blue. During the first hour of the storm, birds and other animals had screamed for their kin to get to safety. Now all life was quiet, listening to the terrible concert as it climbed to its crescendo. A single crow called out as Darkshadow passed below, but he ignored its warning.

Mud splattered up Darkshadow's legs, caking his paws and slowly extending up to his shoulders. His fur was completely soaked through and he shivered despite himself. His warm body steamed in the cold.

The thunder rumbled like an angry beast and lightening streaked across the sky. There was a terrible crash not far ahead of Darkshadow. The noise temporarily rendered him deaf. His matted fur struggled to rise and his surprise produced such a rise in him that he dove into the cover of a bush, peaking out suspiciously for the source of the crack. He got his answer as an ancient tree split into three sections and collapsed, causing another ruckus. Animals nearby squealed in terror but could hardly be heard over the wind. Curious, Darkshadow cautiously crept closer to the scene. The tree had already died long ago and its dry inside had allowed a fire to spring to life on its shattered corpse. Trees and shrubs nearby hissed and popped as the heat sucked their moisture out. A great cloud of smoke hung low in the air like a thick, acrid fog whose scent burned the noses and stung the eyes of all the animals within its dark clutches, but the fire was not powerful enough to overtake the rain and could only gasp and choke as it struggled to hold onto its life. But the rain prevailed and soon even the glowing coals were gone. The fat raindrops got to work clearing the sky of all hints of the poisonous cloud, saving the slower animals from suffocation.

Darkshadow moved on, blinking the last of the smoke from his eyes and sneezing occasionally to clean out his nose. Though it was nearly impossible to see and smell, he managed not to run into anything.

At last, Darkshadow found what he was looking for: a small hollow under some tree roots. There was a high lip and thick moss around the entrance that prevented flooding. Some moisture had gotten in, dampening the ground slightly, but the roof didn't leak and, although it probably wasn't as warm or dry as the warriors' den was, he didn't have to worry about getting crushed by a mountain of bodies. Darkshadow scratched the ground lightly with his claws to soften it, then curled into a tight ball.

Before Darkshadow could begin to fall asleep, his ears alerted him to something approaching outside. It was close; he couldn't hear very far due to the wind, rain, and thunder. He tried to pick up a life signature, but it was impossible to smell anything but the grubs and tree immediately surrounding him. He raised his hackles and bared his fangs, prepared to fight off whatever creature was hoping to steal this den from him.

A feline head poked into the den. Darkshadow could only make out a silhouette and the musky air was still too thick for him to make out a proper scent. A flash of lightening gave him a brief glimpse of stark-white fur as the cat crept into the den beside him.

"Hello," came Windlegs's soft voice. She pressed close to him and began licking his coat dry.

"Hello," Darkshadow said, not bothering to hide his surprise.

"You'll get sick if you stay wet like this," Windlegs chided.

"I suppose you're right." Darkshadow, not knowing what else to do, began drying Windlegs's coat.

"Do you mind if I stay?" she asked. "It's very crowded in the warriors' den."

"So long as it's just you, that'll be alright. I left for the same reason." The patch of soft, white fur he'd been working on began fluffing itself out again under his expert tongue. "How did you find me?" he asked.

"I was following you as soon as you left. I didn't want anything to happen to you. I lost you when you came in here and it took me a little while to realize how you'd disappeared," Windlegs explained simply.

"Ah."

They fell into comfortable silence in which they groomed the last water droplets from each other's coats. When they were finished, they pressed close together, much warmer and thankful for the other's company.

It was still very dark in the hollow when Darkshadow awoke the next morning, but a stream of bright light was resting on his eyes, blinding and confusing him when he opened them. He looked around at his surroundings, wondering if the light was caused by another spark of lightening, but the beam was too warm and constant. Darkshadow looked up to the entrance and made a disturbing discovery. The exit was barred by a pile large branches laying over each other, allowing in only three small triangles of sunlight. He gently prodded Windlegs.

"Hm…what is it?" the she-cat asked sleepily without opening her eyes. She purred and pressed closer to Darkshadow's side.

As much as Darkshadow liked having her there, the present situation called for action. "See for yourself. It seems we're trapped."

"That's fine with me," Windlegs sighed. Then his words struck her and she lifted her head, eyes wide open. "Trapped? What do you mean 'trapped'?"

"I mean not able to escape. Look." Darkshadow gestured to the sealed entrance.

Windlegs saw. She leapt up and ran to the opening and began shoving one of the heavy branches. It groaned and shifted down, sealing off one of the triangles of light and dimming the hollow further. Windlegs backed up. "What…what do we do now?"

"I don't know," Darkshadow confessed. He walked up and pressed his shoulder to the branch. It didn't budge. He peered out through one of the holes. He discovered four, thick, crisscrossing branches piled up against the roots of the tree he and Windlegs were currently under. They were too heavy to be moved by one or even two cats, especially with their weight stacked on top of each other.

He stepped back and looked over at Windlegs. When his eyes readjusted to the dark, he was surprised to find her panting and trembling in the back off the hollow, curled into a tight ball with her fur fluffed out. "Windlegs? What's wrong?" She growled and swiped at him when he attempted to draw nearer. He was confused, but realization struck him quickly. Never, in all her life, had Windlegs been confined anywhere. She was experiencing the same panic and rage that the ringfighters kindled in their fighters before a brawl by locking them in their cages. Darkshadow had learned to handle himself in such a situation and the hollow was much larger than anything he'd ever been trapped in before, but for Windlegs, this was torture and it was reducing her to her most feral state.

"Windlegs," Darkshadow said softly, lowering his body to the ground submissively, "I need you to calm down. It's going to be alright." He padded forward a few steps, drawing nearer, speaking soothingly the entire time.

Windlegs spat and lunged at him, claws fully extended, eyes blind to who he was. There was no one and nothing else for her to lash out at, so she focused her frantic energy on Darkshadow. She was no match for Darkshadow's calm, calculating mind, however, and he easily pinned her down before she could do any damage.

"We can't fight right now." She swiped at his ears, apparently trying to prove him wrong. "Windlegs, please, listen to me. We'll get out, I promise you. I'll get you out as soon as I can, but you have to help me. You need to stop fighting and focus on helping me find a way out of here, alright? Focus, please." He looked into her eyes, searching for some recognition. "You'll be alright. I won't let anything bad happen to you." Windlegs's struggles weakened and eventually ceased. "That's it. Freedom is right there. Right past those branches, not far at all. We just need to get to it, ok? And we can't do that if we're fighting. Will you stop attacking me if I let you up?" Windlegs nodded. "Say it."

"I won't attack you," she vowed. Darkshadow backed off and she got to her paws. "But what are we going to do?" she asked desperately, shaking herself off.

"I'm not sure, but panicking won't help." He went back to the opening and pressed each available branch. None of them budged.

"You can't move them," Windlegs said, the hints of a hysterical giggle in her voice.

Darkshadow looked back at her. "Keep calm. I'll figure something out." She was trembling. "Come here." Windlegs walked over and pressed herself close to his side. "Look out there. You see? It's the forest, just like we left it. It's warm and sunny. The other clans think it's always dark in ShadowClan territory, but we know better, don't we? You'll feel the sun on your face very soon. As soon as we get out of here."

"There is no way out," Windlegs giggled.

"Yes there is. There's always a way out. Look here." Darkshadow scratched at the root above them. It was soft and a shower of dirt and wood rained down on the cats. "If we scrape away at this root, we'll be able to get enough leverage to roll that branch away a bit. Then we can squeeze out."

Windlegs eagerly helped Darkshadow claw away at the root. When the first few soft layers of the root were gone and their claws stopped making headway, they peered out through the tiny hole they'd made. Satisfied that it would be enough, they turned around and pressed their hind paws to the targeted branch. With all their might, they shoved and strained at the branch until it rolled just a few inches out of the way, producing a tiny hole. Darkshadow would have preferred to let Windlegs out first, but the hole's size was questionable and he was the thinner of the two.

"I'll go out and make it bigger for you," he promised. Windlegs nodded mutely and he rose onto his hind legs to test the size of the hatch. His whiskers brushed the edges and his instincts screamed at him that his body couldn't fit, but he lifted himself through anyway.

When he got the upper half of his body out, Darkshadow braced his front paws on the branch and started pulling himself the rest of the way out. It was a tight squeeze. For several seconds, he feared he was stuck, but, millimeter by millimeter, he pulled through. Just as he was lifting one of his hind legs to help propel himself the rest of the way out of the hole, the branch shifted, pressing back into its previous position. Darkshadow kicked frantically, not wanted to get crushed and unable to slide back. The branch suddenly stopped and the gap loosened around his waist.

"Hurry," Windlegs grunted from below, "I don't know how long I can hold it."

If Darkshadow had eaten that morning, he wouldn't have made it. It was tight and slightly painful, but he finally yanked the rest of his body through. He lost his balance and ended up tumbling down the pile of branches.

"Darkshadow!"

The branch had fallen back into place, cementing Windlegs in the hollow. Darkshadow scrambled up.

"Calm down," he called. "It's alright. I'll get you out. Push on the branch again."

Darkshadow shoved from above and Windlegs from below. The branch rolled away again, this time a little further. When it was far enough for Windlegs to get through, Darkshadow arched his body over the gap, jamming it open.

"Come on," he panted.

Windlegs struggled to climb out under him. He tugged at the skin on her shoulders, helping her pull herself out. Finally, she was free and the two tumbled down the pile and landed on top of each other on the ground. Windlegs sucked in several lungfuls of fresh air before nuzzling into Darkshadow's chest.

"Thank you," she whispered.

"No problem," Darkshadow said with a smile.

Windlegs stood. "Sorry I, uh, you know, attacked you in there. I don't know what came over me." She looked at her paws in embarrassment.

"Don't worry about it. Happens to the best of us," Darkshadow said with a shrug.

"You weren't scared," Windlegs pointed out.

It was Darkshadow's turn to look at the ground. "I guess I've had more experience."

Windlegs remembered what he'd said about the fighting cats and their cages.

"We should probably go back to camp now. We slept late. They'll be wondering where we've been." Darkshadow was caught off guard when Windlegs nuzzled into his chest again, purring loudly. She pulled back after a moment and looked into his eyes.

"I forgive you, you know," she said softly.

Darkshadow didn't know what to say so he just stood there with his mouth half-open.

Windlegs decided to continue. "I fought against it for a long time, but finally I realized I just can't stay angry with you. I…" she trailed off for a moment, seeming at a loss for words. She soon found them again. "I love you."

Darkshadow blinked rapidly, unsure that he'd heard right. But Windlegs was looking at him expectantly and he said the only thing he could, "I love you, too."

Windlegs visibly relaxed and she smiled. "I'm…I'm glad," she said because she couldn't think of anything else.

"Yeah...Me, too." The full realization came to Darkshadow and he leapt into the air. "I love you, Windlegs!" he cried and rubbed his face against hers, purring loud enough to rival the thunder from the night before.

"I love you, too, Darkshadow," Windlegs laughed.

Joy filled her as well and she ran off into the tall grass to release the energy. Darkshadow tore after her and they chased each other for a long while before stopping to catch their breath. They laughed and licked each other's faces.

"We should go back to camp, now. Before they send a search party after us. The camp is sure to be in disarray. They'll need help to clean it up," Windlegs said finally.

Darkshadow nodded and they walked side-by-side back to camp, though neither wanted to return yet.

~X~

Everyone had been up since dawn to repair the damage done to the camp. A group of warriors were working to repair the roof of the den. The apprentices had been charged with the task of recollecting and restocking the fresh kill pile. The stronger warriors were needed to clear out quite a bit of debris and heavy branches. The other dens had seen some damage. Littlecloud and two other warriors had gone off to collect herbs to replace the medicine cat's massive loss. Even the elders were doing what they could. Snaketail had complained about her legs at first, but a stern talking-to from Runningnose had her grudgingly contributing where she could.

The absence of Darkshadow and Windlegs had been immediately noticed. The dawn patrol had been informed to keep an eye out for them as well as any severe damage to the territory. When the dawn patrol returned without a sighting, Mudriver, Thundertail, and Thicketclaw had insisted on joining the next patrol which Blackstar granted, knowing their worry would make them otherwise useless around camp. Tigerstripe had wanted to go as well, but since he was one of the strongest warriors, Blackstar kept him at camp. That patrol didn't find the missing warriors either because, while the patrol was still away, Darkshadow and Windlegs returned.

The clan was glad to see the two again. Several warriors rushed up to Windlegs to ask where she'd gone. A few, to Darkshadow's surprise, even seemed to have been genuinely concerned about him. Tigerstripe was not one of them.

"What were you doing out there with _him_," the orange tabby spat.

"Fuck off, Tigerstripe. I'm in too good of a mood to have you annoying me right now," Windlegs hissed back.

"Still, it would be nice to know why you've had the clan worrying while there was work to be done," Blackstar said as he approached.

"Yeah, about that," Windlegs began bashfully.

"It was mostly my fault." Darkshadow recounted the events of the previous night and that morning, omitting their proclamations of love as that was a bit personal and he didn't feel like having to fight of Tigerstripe at that moment. He also replaced Windlegs's fear and panic with bravery and calmness. It wasn't exactly a lie. He was sure that would have been how Windlegs reacted to the situation if she'd had his experience.

"That sounds like quite an adventure," Blackstar said at the end of Darkshadow's tale.

"You put her in danger," Tigerstripe growled.

"When are you going to stop mothering me?" Windlegs shouted, startling the three toms. She stormed up to Tigerstripe, forcing him back. "For our entire lives you've done nothing but smother me and act like I'm some helpless kit. I'm tired of it!"

"I–"

"Don't interrupt me! I'm just as strong as you are, just as capable, and I always have been. I am perfectly capable of rational thought and caring for myself."

"You're my sister. I just want to protect you," Tigerstripe said weakly, unused to Windlegs getting so furious with him. Annoyed, certainly, but she was seething and he was intimidated. All she said was true.

"And you're my brother, but I've never treated _you _like this, and you've done even stupider things than I ever have! You coddle me even more than mother! And now you have to go and ruin my great mood! I'm sick of this, Tigerstripe! I'm sick of your bullshit. I swear, sometimes I just want to cripple you so you'll know what it's like to have someone do everything for you. See how you like it. Sometimes…" Windlegs growled, completely lost in her anger. "Sometimes I wish you weren't my brother at all!"

The clearing was very silent as everyone turned to watch the confrontation. No one was used to this side of Windlegs. Her last revelation left everyone too shocked to move or say a word. Even Darkshadow felt she'd been harsh.

Tigerstripe looked severely hurt. He tried and failed to hide it as he stood before his sister feeling like his heart had been ripped out.

Windlegs saw his expression and the way everyone was looking at her. Her anger melted away and she felt guilt. "I'm sorry, Tigerstripe. I didn't mean that. I'm glad you're my brother. It's just that…I don't need you to breathe my air for me. I can take care of myself and it hurts that you don't see that. I love you, brother, and I always will, but I need space. Can't you understand that?"

"I…I…" Tigerstripe didn't know what to say. He noticed everyone in the clearing was staring at him and his sister. Embarrassment crept over him as he realized they had all witnessed such a personal moment. Looking at a few of the faces, he saw that none of them were on his side. Even his parents were looking at him with disappointment. It was too much. Trying to maintain as much dignity as possible, he turned on his heels and walked out of the clearing, conscious off all the eyes on him as he went.

Windlegs sighed guiltily. "I should go talk to him."

Blackstar blocked her path. "Perhaps he needs a little space right now as well. Give him some time to think and calm down a bit before you go cornering him again," the leader said.

Windlegs nodded her understanding.

Everyone slowly went back about their business. A few conversations started about what had just been witnessed. Just then, their attention was redirected again toward the camp entrance where the noon patrol was returning, led by a grumbling Russetfur.

"…don't know where those two idiots are…impossible to track anything right now…could've been blown away for all I know. In fact, I hope they were! Would serve them right, running off like that in the middle of a damn storm. Natural selection, I say. Now they can't go spreading their idiot genes to a bunch of idiot kits…"

"Darkshadow!" Mudriver cried, cutting off the deputy's tirade

"Windlegs!" Thicketclaw shouted.

The three excited friends rushed over to be reunited with their lost companions. "Where have you been?" they all asked at once.

Again, Darkshadow and Windlegs recounted their adventure, much to their friends' amazement. And, once again, their professions of love were omitted. Darkshadow again changed the story to make Windlegs braver while they were trapped.

At the end of the story, Windlegs turned to Thicketclaw. "Can I talk to you alone?" She wanted to talk to her about what had happened with Tigerstripe, but didn't feel like dragging Mudriver or Thundertail into the issue.

"Of course," the brown she-cat replied.

Windlegs licked Darkshadow's cheek and smiled. "I'll see you later."

Darkshadow smiled and nodded his goodbye. When Windlegs walked off with Thicketclaw, he noticed Mudriver and Thundertail grinning at him.

"So, you and Windlegs finally, huh?" Thundertail said.

"All alone together in a cozy little den all night long," Mudriver added with a wink.

"Oh, come on you guys. We just slept. Nothing happened," Darkshadow insisted.

"Yet," Mudriver added on, nudging his sister.

~X~

"So, nothing happened, right?"

"Huh?" Windlegs looked at Thicketclaw. "What are you talking about?"

"You and Darkshadow. Nothing happened between you two last night, right?" the brown she-cat asked.

"No, nothing happened," Windlegs affirmed.

"Good," Thicketclaw said with a sigh of relief.

"And what if something had?" Windlegs asked suspiciously. "Would you be angry?"

"'No!" Thicketclaw said quickly. "I just wouldn't want you two rushing into things or anything."

"Rushing into what things?" Windlegs pressed.

"Nothing," Thicketclaw stammered. "Let's just forget I said anything, ok?"

"You still don't trust him, do you?" Windlegs challenged, coming to a halt.

"I didn't say that."

"But it's true. Is this still about that rogue?"

"Maybe a little." Thicketclaw shuffled her front paws uncomfortably.

"I told you he explained that to me. That rogue deserved to die."

"Maybe but…" she trailed off.

"But what?" Windlegs pressed.

"Well, how do you know he wasn't just making that story up so you wouldn't be upset with him?" Thicketclaw felt awful saying it. She didn't want to upset Windlegs.

"He wouldn't lie to me," Windlegs insisted. "And besides, who cares why he killed the rogue? Isn't it enough that he was on our territory? We've killed lots of unwelcomed visitors for that."

"You're right," Thicketclaw said quietly. "I'm just trying to look out for you."

"Everyone's trying to look out for me," Windlegs grumbled.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" Thicketclaw asked, hoping to change the subject.

Windlegs allowed the change and recounted the shameful way she'd blown up at her brother.

Thicketclaw gasped in surprise when Windlegs got to the part about saying she wished Tigerstripe wasn't her brother. "How could you say that?"

"I don't know. I didn't mean it. I felt terrible afterward and have ever since," Windlegs said mournfully.

"Have you spoken to him since?" Thicketclaw asked.

"I apologized and tried to explain that I just wanted space. Then he walked off and Blackstar told me I should probably give him some space for a while."

"Blackstar's probably right. I think you really hurt him."

"I know. And I feel awful!" Windlegs laid down and put a paw over her muzzle.

Thicketclaw walked over and laid down beside her. "Hey, now, don't beat yourself up too bad. Sure you said some things you didn't mean, but in your defense, Tigerstripe really has been an ass to you. I'm surprised it took you this long to call him out like that, actually, although you probably could have gone about it in a more graceful manner."

"Do you think he'll ever forgive me?" Windlegs asked, looking up at her friend.

"Of course. Tigerstripe has thick skin, but he's a softy on the inside and, while that allowed you to hurt him, it also means he won't be able to stay mad at you. He just needs some time."

"You've become very perceptive," Windlegs pointed out.

"Yes, well, someone very smart taught me that I can't be closed off to mine and other peoples' emotions. I have to face them." Thicketclaw looked up at the sky. It held no hints of the terrible storm from only a few hours ago.

Windlegs pressed closer to her friend's side. "Well, give him my thanks for that, then," she said softly.

~X~

It was almost evening before Windlegs decided to seek out Tigerstripe and apologize yet again. He'd returned to camp and helped with the repairs, but she could tell he was avoiding her. It was getting dark before they were done and everyone was exhausted, but the apprentices hadn't been able to catch enough prey to feed the hungry clan, most of the animals were still in hiding, so Blackstar dispatched a hunting patrol. Windlegs saw Tigerstripe walk out of camp and followed.

She knew he could tell she was following him, but Tigerstripe refused to acknowledge her. For a while, he sped up, preventing Windlegs from being able to catch up without trotting which she refused to do. Eventually, he slowed down enough for her to catch up, but he still wouldn't speak to or even look at her. After close to an hour of silence, Windlegs gathered up the courage to speak.

"So, I take it you're still mad at me?"

Tigerstripe didn't respond.

"I'll take that as a 'yes'. I really am sorry. I shouldn't have said what I did back there. And I definitely shouldn't have said it in front of everyone like that. That wasn't fair of me." When Tigerstripe still didn't reply, she sighed and turned to go her own way. "I hope you can forgive me soon."

"I just…" Tigerstripe paused, searching for his words. "I don't trust him. I never did. You know that. And I'm not the only person who didn't trust him, either. Father told me to look out for you when he showed up and I gave my word that I would. I didn't mean for it all to get so out of hand. I just want you safe." He sighed in defeat. "But I did get out of hand. I haven't been fair to you at all and I'm sorry. So," he looked up at her, "can _you_ forgive _me_?"

"I already have," Windlegs said with a smile. She walked up and licked her brother between his eyes. "We forgive each other then?"

Tigerstripe nodded, pressing his nose to her shoulder. "I still don't like him, though."

Windlegs's face fell a bit, but she remained firm. "I don't need your approval."

"I know."

She softened slightly. "But you're my brother and I do want it. Why can't you trust him? Hasn't he proven himself to you, to everyone, yet?"

Tigerstripe was silent, trying to think up a good argument, but he couldn't. Darkshadow hadn't revealed his affair with Dawnlegs, hadn't told Brightpaw who her father was. He was responsible for the rescue of Stormthoughts, Clawfur, and Wildpaw and stopping a war between RiverClan and ShadowClan. He'd never attacked anyone unprovoked. Yes, there were the horrors with the rogues, but was that really so unexplainable? And, in the end, he'd done the right thing by telling everyone. He'd accepted his punishment and returned to ShadowClan when he didn't have to and even though he undoubtedly knew he'd be met with animosity. Why, then, did Tigerstripe still find him to unnerving? To argue that he was a rogue would be childish and unconvincing. He'd spent more time in the clan than out of it and besides, Blackstar had been a rogue and Tigerstripe honored and trusted him.

"I don't know," the orange tom said at last. "I don't like him, and you're right to say it doesn't make sense," he heaved a sigh, "So I'll try for you. I can make no promises, but you're my sister and I want you to be happy. If you find happiness with him, then so be it. You can make your own decisions."

Windlegs rubbed against his cheek. "Thank you."

"But I'll still be there if anything, and I mean _anything_, goes wrong. I swear, if he does something to hurt you, I'll skin him myself," Tigerstripe growled.

Windlegs laughed. "Fine."

"So, um, nothing did happen last night, right?" he asked nervously.

"No. Nothing," Windlegs said, rolling her eyes. Why was everyone so interested?

~X~

Windlegs got rid of her nest next to Thicketclaw and Tigerstripe. Thundertail and Mudriver moved their nests away from Darkshadow's to grant him more room and privacy when they saw him making his nest larger. Windlegs insisted on helping him choose softer bedding and he eventually accepted. That night, Windlegs curled up and fell asleep next to Darkshadow again, but this time, it wasn't in secret.

"They're very happy," Clawfur whispered, peeking at the warriors' den over his shoulder as he and his sister guarded the camp.

Stormthoughts looked troubled. _That's the problem._

Clawfur looked at her, his brow creased. "I know. It isn't fair that they would be so cruel."

Stormthoughts nodded. _It isn't. But how can we expect anything fair for him? The lesson is soon to be learned. He won't be necessary anymore._

"It's cruel," Clawfur spat, "that he can just be thrown away after he does what he's supposed to do. Where is his reward for undergoing so much?"

_It's cruel, _Stormthoughts agreed and they fell silent…

**I know this took forever. I know it was short. I know it was unbearably sappy. Excuse, excuse, explanation, excuse. Did you at least enjoy it? C'mon, they finally got together! Took them long enough. Sheesh. 'Til next time. Reviews make me happy. Darkshadow's about as happy as he's gonna get so, yeah. Bye.**


	39. Chapter 38

**Miss me?**

**Warning: this chapter contains mentions of mating. Nothing explicit, but it happens.**

For the twelfth morning in a row, Darkshadow awoke to discover Windlegs pressed close against his side. She had adopted a position of sleeping on her side with her stomach pressed against him and her nose buried in his chest fur. He had taken to sleeping with his paws curled under him and his head laid across her neck. There was certainly no more sneaking about for either of them since one could not move without alerting the other. But neither wanted to sneak out anymore, anyway. Each day, Darkshadow was able to wake to the sight of his beloved curled close to him.

His movement roused Windlegs and she stretched her legs before opening her eyes to look up into his. Darkshadow felt his heart swell with a level of affection that could only be called love. He recalled having feelings for others; Hope stood out prominently in his mind and he believed he'd possessed some stirrings for Ghost. But still, neither of them had stoked in him the amount of emotion he felt when he thought of Windlegs. Everything about her felt right and he struggled to keep from smiling like an idiot whenever she was around.

"I think we need to get up," Windlegs said in a sleep-roughened voice that sent Darkshadow's fur tingling. He was so breathless, he couldn't answer. Windlegs laughed softly and said, "We're on the dawn patrol, love. We wouldn't want to be late."

"On the contrary," Darkshadow said, reluctantly standing as she prodded him, "I would be more than happy to be late. In fact, I want to not show up at all. The unfortunate truth is: we _shouldn't_ be late unless we want to be skinned. And I have no desire for that."

"Yeah. I can see you've probably had enough of it," Windlegs said, regarding the bare patches on each of his shoulders. She stood, stretched again, gave a mighty yawn, and shook the last of the cobwebs of sleep from her body. It was as though she'd undergone a miraculous transformation. Her eyes were wide and bright and her fur bristled in readiness for the day.

The two warriors silently crept out of the den, careful not to awaken their fellow clan members since that too might result in a skinning that neither of them were inclined toward. The sun was just beginning to extend its rays and pull itself over the horizon. The night guards walked past Darkshadow and Windlegs on their way to the warriors' den, yawning a sleepy greeting to them.

Tawnypelt and Mousepaw were the only others on the patrol. The small apprentice looked very tired and kept trying to lean against his mentor for support, but Tawnypelt just kept pushing him upright.

"Come on, snap out of it. You're being almost as lazy as Wildpaw," the tortoiseshell she-cat said, nudging Mousepaw upright again.

"I'm not being lazy, I'm just resting my eyes until Darkshadow and Windlegs get here. That way, on the patrol, I'll be able to see better because my eyes won't be tired from the strain of looking at nothing," Mousepaw replied, falling against Tawnypelt's leg again only to be pushed upright so roughly that he almost fell over.

"A noble idea but you can quit resting now. They're here," the mentor said.

"Oh," Mousepaw said, sounding disappointed. At a look from Tawnypelt, he added in a more chipper voice, "Fantastic! Now we can get to patrolling."

"Yes. And after that you can go back to sleep," Windlegs said as she and Darkshadow approached.

"Oh no he can't. We've got plenty of work to do today. He's already been set back thanks to that damned storm," Tawnypelt said.

"Mercy, Tawnypelt, mercy!" Mousepaw begged dramatically.

Tawnypelt rolled her eyes. "It's always the same with him. He thinks himself so clever but he turns into a giant kit if he has to get up early," she grumbled.

"Not unlike his mentor," Darkshadow joked. It earned him a scathing look from the eldest she-cat and he hastily added, "Or so I'm told." He was silently glad that Tawnypelt had refused to mentor him. She was an absolute general. The other apprentices had the day off, but Mousepaw almost never shared the holiday.

"Let's go, already," Windlegs chuckled and the patrol set off.

Darkshadow found it rather hard to concentrate during the entire march. Windlegs usually didn't distract him this much, no matter how love-struck he was. Mousepaw also seemed to be having some trouble. He kept glancing back at Windlegs, then shaking his head and facing forward again as though trying to dispel an annoying bug. Every time the small tom looked toward Windlegs or seemed to be getting closer to her, a fierce pang of jealousy and possessiveness overcame Darkshadow. His claws would extend slightly and his lip would curl up in a barely-contained growl. Mousepaw would quickly submit and continue on until he again became distracted. They stopped for a short rest and Darkshadow barely resisted the urge to claw poor Mousepaw's ears when the apprentice crept close enough to Windlegs to sniff her pelt. She batted him away, however, and saved Darkshadow from having to wrestle down primal urges.

_Creator, just let the patrol end already! _Darkshadow thought desperately.

His prayer went unanswered. It felt like an eternity before they finally trekked back to camp. By this point, Mousepaw was wide awake and more than willing to go with Tawnypelt –and get away from Darkshadow and Windlegs.

"Are you alright, Darkshadow?" Windlegs asked when apprentice and mentor had gone.

"Yes, fine," Darkshadow said quickly, struggling to maintain control of himself as the clan bustled around him. _Come now, get a hold of yourself and stop being foolish, _Darkshadow berated himself. _Oh, Creator, she smells fantastic! Stop!_

"Are you sure you're alright?" Windlegs asked, lowering her voice. She stepped closer to Darkshadow and pressed her shoulder to his, rubbing her head against his chest and purring. She walked a circuit around his body and flicked his nose with her tail as she went by. "I would be glad to tend to you if you needed it."

Darkshadow's heart raced and his paws tingled. Although he was staring right at her, it took several seconds for him to realize Windlegs was walking out of camp.

"Hey, Darkshadow. What–"

"Later," the tabby said, cutting off Mudriver's question before sliding after Windlegs.

Mudriver looked at Thundertail in confusion. Then a scent reached his nose that caused him to stiffen slightly. Thundertail smelled it as well, although she didn't have the same reaction.

"Ah, so that's it. Come on, brother, we'll see them later," the black warrior said, nudging her brother into motion in the opposite direction their friends had gone.

~X~

Though Darkshadow knew he could probably overtake Windlegs if he sped up, he patiently walked behind her, following her scent trail. His slow start had allowed her to get far enough ahead of him to disappear, but he knew that if he followed long enough, he would find her. For the better part of an hour, he scented his way through a winding trail going deeper into the territory.

At last, he reached the end of the trail. Windlegs was rolling in a familiar patch of yellow-green grass. Occasionally, she would stop, lick her shoulder or flank, and then roll once more. Darkshadow's eyes darkened and his heart thundered. As though she heard, Windlegs's ears flicked toward him. She glanced his way, hissed, and went back to grooming herself.

Darkshadow crossed the grass toward her, moving slowly. She stopped grooming and hissed again. When he continued to approach, she stood, arched her back, fluffed out her tail and the fur on her spine, and growled warningly, extending her claws. Darkshadow angled his approach to circle around her, but she refused to show him her back. He didn't give up and continued to circle, slowly spiraling inward.

Despite her instinctive warnings and hostile behavior, Darkshadow could see in Windlegs's eyes that she wouldn't hurt him…too much. When he was close enough, he feigned that he would continue his counter-clockwise path, but instead rushed Windlegs's right side which she wasn't guarding as much and pounced.

~X~

It was almost another hour before Windlegs had settled down enough to allow Darkshadow near her again. He stayed near the edge of the clearing in the shadows as she groomed herself thoroughly. When she stopped turning to him to glare and growl every few minutes, he decided to try approaching. She was on edge at first, but he remained low to the ground and submissive so as not to spark any outburst and eventually he was able to lay by her side without having to worry about her taking another swipe at him. Though it was unnecessary, he began grooming her shiny white coat.

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" Windlegs asked after a few more minutes.

Darkshadow paused for a moment before bursting into a peel of laughter. "That would be the first thing you have to say!" he said, laughing again.

Windlegs shrugged. "Are you going to answer my question?"

"Yes, I will answer your question. The answer is: No, you didn't hurt me. I'm fine. Better than fine, actually. And you?"

"Perfect," Windlegs said.

"Good. Although," Darkshadow said, "that was quite a blow you gave my ear. Aren't they torn up enough, or did you just think I would look better with them gone completely?" He smiled so she would know he was joking.

Windlegs smiled back and gave Darkshadow's right ear a playful smack. "Gone completely. You can hardly call those ears anymore."

Darkshadow snorted in mock indignation, "My ears are perfectly good, thank you! Besides, they give me character."

"Yes, well, let's hope our kits don't inherit so much of your character that they get your talent for self-destruction. I'm not sure I could bear to see more of those I love torn to bits, even if the scars don't mar their good looks."

"Good looks?" Darkshadow asked with a smirk.

"Well of course." Windlegs licked her right paw. "Hopefully they will inherit my glorious features and that will outweigh whatever you might contribute."

Darkshadow laughed, then placed a paw on her stomach, smiling broadly. He had no way of knowing if they would, in fact, have any kits yet, but the idea that she could someday carry their children filled him with too much pleasure for him to keep a lid on it.

They remained silent, then, just enjoying each other's company. Windlegs busied herself grooming Darkshadow and he purred under her ministrations. When the grooming was done, Windlegs rolled onto her back and looked up at the sky beyond the grass and tree branches.

"Can I ask you a question?" Darkshadow said, hesitant to break the silence.

"What?" Windlegs turned her head to look at him.

"I was wondering, should we have a kit–"

"_When_ we have kit_s_," Windlegs corrected.

"Right. When we have kits, do you think, perhaps, I could take them to see the territory in spring, even if they aren't apprentice-age, yet? I think it would be nice to experience it for the first time with them. With you as well. As a family." Darkshadow looked at the ground, slightly embarrassed.

Windlegs rolled onto her side and stared at him in shock. "You've never seen ShadowClan in spring or summer, have you?"

Darkshadow shook his head. "I spent my first summer here in the nursery. I was banished just before spring and spent both spring and summer away from here."

Windlegs was stunned into silence for a moment. "That's terrible," she whispered. "ShadowClan in beautiful in spring and wonderfully cool in summer thanks to the shade. You can smell the sweet scent of grass all the time and prey is abundant, I think moreso than in the other territories, although I can't be sure. And the sky," she looked up again, "you can always see it. In the forest, the trees grow thick with leaves and block it out, but not here. Here, you need only look up and it's right there, but the grass and bushes keep you sheltered from the harshness of the sun."

"It sounds fantastic," Darkshadow said, imagining the picture Windlegs painted. He thought back to the time he spent in the mountains. Windlegs would have loved it there. The sky was so close, Darkshadow felt like he could hop right into the clouds. He refrained from telling her this, however. He didn't want to drag up the past when everything was so perfect right here.

'_Oh, merciful Creator, spare me this disgusting scene!'_

Darkshadow cringed. _Please, not now!_ Since he had gotten with Windlegs, he hadn't experienced any nightmares or heard a sound from Darkstripe. He was beginning to think he'd finally been cured by the miracle that was the beautiful she-cat beside him. He'd been wrong.

'_Honestly, if you have to get it on, then fine, I can handle sitting in on that. We're animals with a animal's needs. I can leave you to it. But this sappy, mushy, glop? That's cruel and unusual punishment and I won't stand for it.'_

'_Be quiet, would you! Go away!' _Darkshadow begged. If Darkstripe was still inside of him, he could deal with it, he had for moons. But why did Darkstripe have to reappear at such a wonderful time?

'_Why? So you can be alone to ruin more lives?' _Darkstripe snapped.

'_What are you talking about? I haven't ruined anyone's life…recently. I haven't done anything.'_

'_Oh, gosh, what's the word I'm looking for? Hm…Oh yeah! Bullshit! Haven't done anything? I'd say you just did something pretty major.'_

'_Hey, you don't have to watch. Besides, I don't mind ruining your life. After all, you've done a number on mine. Seems like fair pay-back.'_

'_As horrifying as the sight of you getting some is, it's not my life I was talking about. At least Windlegs is nice to look at. No, I'm talking about the new life, or lives, you're planning on creating with her.'_

Darkshadow was confused. _'Kits? What do kits have to do with this?' _He could feel Darkstripe's impatience.

'_Do me a favor, princess, and use this nifty brain of yours for once in your miserable life. Everyone in the clan now knows that you've laid claim to Little Miss Perfect over there, yes? Of course. So if she winds up knocked up, it's gonna be pretty obvious who did the deed unlike in the case of free-rolling Cara.'_

'_Well, yeah, I would expect so. So what?'_

Darkstripe rolled his eyes. _'Oh my Creator, you're kidding me, right? How do you think the clan will feel about having your kits running around? They didn't even want one of you. Do you really think they want two or three or four and so on?'_

'_Things are different now. And they'll have changed even more by the time the kits are born. Besides, they're Windlegs's kits too,' _Darkshadow said.

'_Uh, newsflash: they still think you're a murderer! They always will. Nothing you do will change that and when you have kits, those kits will be marked. It doesn't matter if Windlegs is their mother; no one in the clan will dare to turn their back on them for fear that they'll be just like you,' _Darkstripe finished in a hiss.

Darkshadow felt his pulse speed up just slightly. He tried to convince himself that Darkstripe was lying. He was bored from being locked up and decided to get back at Darkshadow by playing with his mind. But the fear didn't go away. Could Darkstripe be right? Would his children forever be marked as the spawn of a murderer? He had been. But no, Windlegs would never let the kits become that. She would raise them in love and would always take care of them. But what if it was hereditary? Darkshadow had learned a lot in his time gone, including that a cat's temperament depended just as much on genetics as upbringing. Could his murderous tendencies be passed on to his children just as they had from his father? And even if it wasn't, would he be condemning good, kind cats to be forever considered social outcasts simply because of the sins of the father? Could he trust ShadowClan and the rest of the forest to look past heritage? His experience told him no. Darkshadow stood abruptly, confusing Windlegs.

"What is it?" Windlegs asked.

"I…I have to go…hunting," Darkshadow said. He needed time. Time alone to think and calm down.

"Now?"

"Yes, now. Definitely now." Darkshadow knew he was speaking too fast and wasn't making sense but he couldn't bring himself to share his thoughts with Windlegs. At least not yet.

"I'll go with you." Windlegs stood.

"No!" Darkshadow lowered his voice. "I mean, no. I want to be alone. Just for a little while. I need to think." Hurt, confusion, concern crossed Windlegs's face and Darkshadow licked her forehead, not wanting to see her pretty face distressed. "I'll explain later, I swear. Just, right now, I have to think, ok? I'll see you tonight and you can drag it out of me if you have to." This didn't seem to reassure her so Darkshadow licked her face again. "I love you." Before she could protest, he dashed into the forest.

A run. That was all he needed. Just a run to clear his head. His words to Windlegs came back to him. Hunting didn't sound like a bad idea. And he'd have to come back to camp with something to avoid arousing suspicion anyway. Without slowing down, he closed his eyes and began scanning the forest. The life signature of a rabbit in the bushes not far to his right showed up. Opening his eyes, he changed direction and charged toward the hiding place. But, in his haste, he snapped a twig. The rabbit became alert instantly and took off.

Frustrated and excited at the prospect of a good chase, Darkshadow raced after it. He was careful to avoid making any more noise. However, his care cost him speed and the rabbit remained ahead of him, but only barely. It seemed the poor creature didn't have a den nearby because it continued to run for quite a while, dashing this way and that without disappearing.

Darkshadow was so focused on his chase, that he stopped paying attention to his surroundings. Becoming more frustrated with every pawstep, he began crashing through the underbrush without paying any attention to where he was going. He finally began to gain on the rabbit and put on a burst of speed. Concentrating all his power in his legs, he lept into the air and landed on his target, intent on a killing blow.

A split second before Darkshadow landed, the rabbit had been prepared to make a hairpin turn. As a result, Darkshadow's bite was off and did not snap the rabbit's neck, although it was mortally wounded.

The most bone-chilling noise Darkshadow had ever heard erupted from the wounded rabbit. He'd heard of the death noise injured rabbits made, but had never heard it himself. It felt like his ears were being ripped open and filled with thorns. He wanted to end the noise, but felt frozen. On the verge of being driven mad by the terrible screech, Darkshadow tore himself from his stupor and snapped the rabbit's neck. The noise stopped immediately and the air became eerily silent and still. Darkshadow wouldn't have been surprised if all prey animals in the forest had gone into hiding. That was a powerful weapon the rabbit possessed.

Darkshadow stared down at the rabbit for a moment, then looked around to see where he was. The world had looked alien after the cry. Darkshadow's wits were returning but the land still looked strange. A chill went up Darkshadow's spine when he realized he didn't recognize this territory at all. He closed his eyes and sniffed. There was no scent of ShadowClan anywhere, but there was another scent.

He opened his eyes and whipped his head around. He must have crossed the border a while back, not paying attention due to the chase. He cursed himself for his stupidity. He wasn't in the rogue territories anymore; he had to be mindful of boundaries. No wonder the rabbit had run here; this was where the main rabbit population resided. He scooped up his prey and prepared to sneak back into ShadowClan territory.

A heavy weight suddenly pinned Darkshadow to the ground. The scent of a WindClan warrior overpowered his nose.

"What do you think you're doing here, ShadowClan?" hissed the warrior on Darkshadow's back.

"Hunting!" shouted another upon seeing the rabbit in Darkshadow's mouth.

The rest of the patrol roared in anger.

Darkshadow spat the rabbit out. "I'm sorry. I was hunting and lost track of where I was. Keep the rabbit. I'll return to my territory immediately," he said.

"It's the rogue bastard!" screeched a she-cat. Darkshadow recognized her as Runningtail.

"Blackstar's sending in his pet monsters to invade us again, hm? Does he think WindClan is weak now? How'd he find out?!" growled the warrior still pinning Darkshadow.

"Find what out? I'm not invading anything. It was an accident," Darkshadow insisted.

"I say we take him back to camp," said a small apprentice.

"Good idea," said Runningtail.

Darkshadow finally moved, surprising the warrior on top of him. He knocked the tom off and stood up. "I'm afraid I can't stay," he said, baring his fangs. "I'm sorry about the rabbit. I'll leave it here, now let me go."

"I don't think so," the female warrior said. The WindClan patrol moved to surround Darkshadow.

"It wasn't a request." Darkshadow shot in the direction of the ShadowClan border. The WindClan cats were upon him in an instant.

There were a total of four cats in the patrol. Runningtail, the tom that had pinned Darkshadow, a she-cat and her apprentice. Darkshadow should have been able to hold his own at least well enough to get free and run to the border. He had no doubt in his mind that he could have outrun even these long-legged cats. But he didn't want to hurt the warriors or the apprentice, and so he held back. But the warriors had no problem hurting him. This put him at a severe disadvantage and he was eventually overpowered.

"Surrender or we'll kill you now," growled the tom.

"I say we kill him anyway," Runningtail mumbled.

"No. Surrender and let us take you to camp for the leader to deal with you, or die. Your choice," the tom said.

"Alright, I'll go with you," Darkshadow relented. He was injured now. Even if he could run, he might not be able to outrun them. Tallstar was a fair cat. Surely he would understand that this was a simple misunderstanding and let him go.

The tom cautiously released Darkshadow. Darkshadow stood, but made no attempt to run so the tom took the lead and the rest of the patrol boxed the silver tabby in and they made their way to the WindClan camp.

As soon as they entered the camp, Darkshadow could hear whispers circulate among the warriors. An angry yowl rang out from one of the dens. Darkshadow assumed it was the leader's den and lowered his head as he awaited Tallstar. However, he was in for a surprise when, instead of a black and white tom, a brown tabby stormed into the bright sunlight. The WindClan warriors hung back in respect.

"Onestar," said the large tom leading the patrol, "we discovered this ShadowClan warrior hunting in our territory during our patrol."

"He attacked us!" piped in the apprentice.

"I only attacked because you wouldn't let me go. Look, I don't have time for this. I apologize for my mistake. It won't happen again. Where's Tallstar?" Darkshadow said, hoping the elder tom would be sensible enough to understand the innocent mistake.

"As if you don't know," the brown tabby said, bristling.

"Know what?" Darkshadow was getting tired of this game.

"Tallstar's dead so Blackstar thinks he can take advantage of our new leader. Well, he's wrong. Onestar is a strong leader. ShadowClan will never push us around again," Runningtail hissed.

"Dead?" Darkshadow said.

"Yes. Now, what I'd like to know is how Blackstar found out. Has he been sending in spies?" Onestar demanded.

Darkshadow hadn't even known Onewhisker was deputy. He rarely paid attention during gatherings. Aside from the leaders and a few warriors and apprentices, Darkshadow couldn't really name any cat in the clans, especially not deputies. He racked his brain for the announcement, as he was certain Onewhisker hadn't been deputy before he left, but he couldn't come up with it. It must have happened while he was away, not that it mattered anymore. Onewhisker wasn't the deputy now; he was Onestar, the leader. But how had that happened? He could remember seeing Tallstar at the last gathering. The old tom had looked to be in perfect health, just as strong as any young warrior if not moreso. Darkshadow couldn't say he'd miss the old leader –they'd never met– but he would have to deal with Onestar now and he certainly wasn't fond of that idea.

"Stop flattering yourself. Blackstar has no interest in spying on WindClan or any clan and we had no idea of your leader's death. Hell, I didn't even know you were the deputy. I got sidetracked while I was hunting, that's all."

Onestar snorted. "A likely story."

If Darkshadow hadn't been injured and surrounded, he would have liked to claw the other tabby's ears off.

Onestar flicked his ear. "Lock our guest here up. We'll see what his leader has to say about him at the next gathering."

"What?!" Darkshadow shouted. "That's completely unreasonable!" Onestar glared at him. _Calm yourself, Darkshadow_, he told himself. _You may not like him, but he's a leader, and a new one at that. Treat him with respect he wants even if he doesn't deserve it._ Darkshadow dipped his head and lowered his voice. "What I mean is: why don't you just take me back to my camp and speak to Blackstar now?"

Onestar smirked as though Darkshadow's words amused him. "If what you say is true and Blackstar doesn't know of our change in leadership, then he can wait like all the other leaders to find out. I'd hate to ruin the surprise. Lock him up."

Before Darkshadow could protest, he was being shoved to the back of the camp. The WindClan members stared at him as he went past. A few sneered or hissed at him, but he didn't say or do anything in return. He heard Onestar announce a clan meeting.

Not far outside of the WindClan camp, there was a large rocky formation that looked to Darkshadow like a miniature High Stones. The large tom from the patrol led him to the mouth of the rocky cave. It was pitch black inside and, hard as Darkshadow tried, he couldn't see where the chamber ended.

"Get in," ordered the patrol tom.

Darkshadow closed his eyes and was about to use his gift to try and detect what was in the chamber, but he received a hard shove from behind and his eyes flew open as he stumbled down a rocky slope. It was so steep that it was all Darkshadow could do to keep his footing and not roll to the bottom. His paws finally hit a level surface and he skidded to a stop. He turned around and could just make out the silhouette of the tom.

"Enjoy your stay." The stone magnified the sound and it sounded to Darkshadow as if the sentence had been shouted in his ears by dozens of cats.

Darkshadow looked around himself. He couldn't see a thing. The air felt heavy and damp. He shivered, missing the sun already. Even ShadowClan territory wasn't this cold. He closed his eyes and sniffed. There wasn't much to see. A few insects had a home down here, safe from predators. Some form of moss was growing on the walls of the chamber which gave him an idea of its size. It was quite vast down here. The room was larger than any den Darkshadow had ever been in, which surprised him slightly. Did WindClan ever have enough prisoners to fill this place at one time? Darkshadow had a hard time believing WindClan ever had prisoners so he went with his second guess that this was a convenient prison and it happened to be this large naturally. And, finally, Darkshadow could see the life signature of the tom back at the mouth of the cave. Apparently, he had a guard. One tom wouldn't be enough to stop him, normally. Already the aches from his wounds were fading and all bleeding had stopped. But, he calculated that, if he ran straight up that slope, he'd be too tired to fight properly just long enough to give his guard the upper paw.

'_On the bright side, your wounds are mild enough that they probably won't get infected. You might live through this, pal! Aside from, you know, the damp air giving you pneumonia. Maybe that's the plan. Ooh, these WindClan cats are smarter than I gave them credit for,'_ Darkstripe said.

'_Shut up,' _Darkshadow hissed. _'It's your fault I'm in this mess.'_

'_My fault? How is this my fault? I mean, I don't mind taking the fall for this because it's hilarious, but how did I earn such an honor?'_

'_You had to go and be negative and ruin my nice day. Why can't you ever just leave me alone?'_

'_I was just telling you the truth. It's not my fault you don't like hearing it. And at no point did I say, "Hey, why don't you ditch your girlfriend and cross into the territory of the asshole clan?" If anything, you brought this on yourself.'_

'_I didn't mean to cross the border!' _Darkshadow shouted. How had one stupid mistake escalated into this?

'_That's not what I meant, prima donna. You just up and ditched Windlegs after _the first time you two had sex! _Even _I_ know you shouldn't do that!'_

'_So, what, you think she's mad at me?'_

'_Classy she-cat like Windlegs? Nah, I don't think she has any reason to be mad. I think she should be fucking pissed!'_

_Crap, _Darkshadow thought privately. _'Well, why are you so concerned?'_

'_I'm not concerned. I'm just pissed that you got us in this clusterfuck because I wanted to see the fireworks when you went back to her. Now, she'll probably be so concerned about you that she'll forgive you or some sappy shit like that.'_

'_This is all your fault,' _Darkshadow growled.

'_Blame me if that makes you feel better, princess, but this is your mess so you're gonna have to clean it. I suggest you come to terms with that.'_

'_Leave me alone.'_

'_You sure you want me to do that? You're gonna be down here for a while and I don't think soldier boy up there is going to be a very good conversational companion.'_

"Fuck off!" Darkshadow snapped. His voice echoed around the chamber and up the slope.

"Bet you'd like that, wouldn't you?" the guard called back.

Darkstripe was silent for several moments. Just when Darkshadow began to believe he'd done as he was told, he spoke. _'Alright. You want me to leave that bad? Ok. I know when I'm not wanted. I'll go, but you'll miss me. When the quiet starts to get to you and you start hallucinating your precious clanmates just to keep you company, you'll want me back. But I won't come. I'm done with you. You'll see.'_

Darkshadow snorted. _'Bullshit. You'll come whining back eventually. You've told me you'd leave before and you never do. You've got nowhere to go. You'll be just as lonely as me.'_

Darkstripe didn't reply. Darkshadow didn't hear another sound from him for the rest of the day. He couldn't even sense his lurking presence in the back of his mind.

"He'll be back," Darkshadow muttered to himself.

~X~

Windlegs walked into ShadowClan camp alone. For some reason, she felt awkward when her clanmates turned to look at her. Surely they had all seen her leave with Darkshadow, and now she was returning alone. She'd considered going out to find him, but he'd said he wanted to be alone and promised to explain later. All she had to do was wait. Darkshadow functioned differently than any other cat she knew. She'd have to make allowances for his peculiar behavior if they were going to be together. And besides, he was trustworthy…most of the time. Windlegs shook her head, resolving not to over think it.

Thicketclaw suddenly came bounding over. For once, Windlegs really didn't want to speak with her, but she couldn't just snub her best friend. But she didn't want to tell Thicketclaw what happened, either. The brown she-cat already didn't like Darkshadow. She wouldn't understand. Windlegs didn't fully understand. The white warrior decided to just act like everything was normal.

"What's wrong?" Thicketclaw asked immediately.

Damn. Speckledthorn really had taught her to be perceptive. "Nothing," Windlegs said unconvincingly.

"Okay. Now tell me the truth. Where's Darkshadow?"

Windlegs shrugged.

"You don't know?"

"He went hunting."

"Without you?"

"He said he wanted to be alone."

"But the way you two left this morning, I thought…" Thicketclaw saw how Windlegs uncomfortably shuffled her paws. "Did you two…?"

Windlegs nodded, refusing to look up at Thicketclaw.

"And then he just left right after?!" Thicketclaw's thick fur bristled, making her size rival Tigerstripe's.

"No. Not _right_ after," Windlegs said.

"Then when did he leave?" Thicketclaw wasn't calming down at all.

"Well, we were just laying together and I brought up kits. And then he got quiet and then said he wanted to go hunting alone." Windlegs realized as she said it just how bad that sounded, especially for Thicketclaw who wanted nothing more in the world than kits.

"Why that good for nothing, perverted–"

"Thicketclaw, it's not like that. He just wanted to be alone. It's not that big a deal."

"No, Windlegs, it _is_ a big deal." Thicketclaw was looking around the camp. Windlegs wasn't sure who she was looking for, but she hoped it wasn't Tigerstripe. Thicketclaw's eyes locked on a cat and she hurried over. Windlegs struggled to follow her. "Thundertail!" Thicketclaw called.

The black she-cat was surprised to have Thicketclaw calling her. They weren't unfriendly, but they hardly spoke. Mudriver joined her in meeting Thicketclaw, but she turned to him. "I think this might be a private thing. Why don't you go…over there for a bit?"

Mudriver looked confused. "Private? What's wrong?"

"Please, Mudriver, just leave us alone for a minute," Thundertail said.

Mudriver relented and walked off, still confused.

"Thanks," Thicketclaw said.

"No problem, but what's the matter?" Thundertail asked.

"Nothing's the matter!" Windlegs insisted.

"Sounds serious," Thundertail said.

Thicketclaw quietly related what Windlegs had told her despite the white she-cat's protests.

Thundertail's ears went back. "The idiot. I'll teach him," she hissed.

"So you'll help me find him?"

"What are we still doing here?"

The two she-cats began to walk to the exit. Windlegs followed them out, then raced ahead of them and blocked their path.

"That's enough! I'm a grown she-cat. If I want to be mad at my mate, I'll be mad at him and I'll argue with him, but I'll do it on my own and on my terms. I don't need you two to go out and handle this for me," Windlegs hissed, hackles raised.

Thicketclaw and Thundertail blinked, looked at each other, then looked back at Windlegs.

"We know," Thicketclaw said.

"Of course you can handle this yourself," Thundertail added.

Windlegs lowered her hackles and tilted her head to the side. "Then what are you doing?"

"As your friends, it's our job to make sure your mate treats you properly. When he does something stupid, we've got to call him out on it. Of course, you'll talk it out with him, but it's our job to let him know that you've got back-up," Thicketclaw said.

"And as Darkshadow's friend, it's also my job to make sure he doesn't fuck up the best thing that's ever happened to him," Thundertail said.

"Oh…So, why didn't you let Mudriver in on this?" Windlegs asked. She wasn't sure when Thundertail and Thicketclaw had worked this system out. Or was it something she was already supposed to know about? She certainly didn't remember being this protective when Thicketclaw was with Speckledthorn. Had she missed something?

The other two she-cat's laughed.

"As much as Mudriver would want to help, he wouldn't be very useful. I'm his sister and you're his friend, so he'd want to be on our side. But he and Darkshadow are _best_ friends. They've had a bromance going since Darkshadow was an apprentice. He was even more depressed than you when Darkshadow was gone. So, of course, he'd also want to defend Darkshadow. He can't play both sides right now, so it wouldn't be very fair to drag him into this," Thundertail explained.

"Besides, I figure you'd want as few cats as possible to know what's going on," Thicketclaw added.

"Oh. Um, thanks," Windlegs said.

Tigerstripe was just returning from his hunting patrol. He saw the three she-cats gathered around by the camp entrance. He set his prey down. "What's going on?" he asked.

"None of your concern. Go put your prey on the pile," Thundertail said.

Tigerstripe scowled. "If my sister's involved, then it is my concern," he snarled.

Thicketclaw suddenly stormed up to him, fur bristling, and said, right to his face, "Well, we're saying this isn't your concern. If Windlegs wants you involved, then she'll tell you, but I didn't hear her give an invitation. Now, pick up that bird of yours and go play with Mudriver or something, but leave us alone."

Tigerstripe had never seen Thicketclaw so riled up and she'd certainly never stood up to him before. He looked to Windlegs, but it was clear she wasn't going to offer any assistance. Finally, he picked up his catch and walked into the camp.

Windlegs smirked as she watched her brother leave with his tail between his legs. She felt a little bad for him. As an apprentice and even a young warrior, he'd been alpha male, so to speak. Now, he was repeatedly getting kicked off his throne without the slightest idea of what went wrong. Yes, they'd all spoiled him too much when he was younger. She returned to the present to find Thicketclaw and Thundertail looking at her expectantly.

"Well," Thicketclaw began, "are you going to let us do our job, now?"

Windlegs stepped aside. "Alright, but don't be too hard on him. Remember, he's different."

"Don't worry, we'll take that into consideration," Thundertail said.

"Yes. Ask Wildpaw, I'm an excellent teacher," Thicketclaw added a little darkly.

The two she-cats disappeared. _Good luck, Darkshadow, _Windlegs thought as she watched them go.

As soon as Windlegs walked back into the camp, Tigerstripe rushed up to bombard her with questions. She did her best to step around his nagging. She loved her brother and she knew he was just trying to look out for her, but she didn't want to tell him what had happened. There were enough cats hunting her wayward mate at the moment and she didn't need another on a search-and-destroy mission. Finally growing sick of the single-track conversation, Windlegs shook Tigerstripe off and went to join Mudriver for a meal.

"Hey, Windlegs," Mudriver said cheerfully as she laid down next to him with Tigerstripe's sparrow.

Windlegs nodded her greeting and began licking the feathers off the bird's tiny breast.

"Um, don't get mad at me or nothing, but do you know where Darkshadow is?" Mudriver asked.

"I don't," Windlegs replied.

"Okay." Mudriver went back to eating. After they'd finished, they shared tongues while making pleasant conversation. Mudriver never once asked where Thicketclaw and Thundertail had gone or tried to press Windlegs for details on what she and Darkshadow had done that morning.

It was getting late and Thundertail and Thicketclaw still hadn't returned nor had Darkshadow. Windlegs was starting to get a little worried. It seemed Mudriver was picking up on it as well.

"Are you still not going to tell me where my sister went?" the silver tom asked.

As soon as he spoke, Thicketclaw and Thundertail emerged from the brush. There was no one following them and they looked troubled. Windlegs rushed over. Mudriver didn't follow.

"What's wrong?" Windlegs asked hesitantly. She wasn't sure she wanted to know, but she had to.

"We couldn't find him," Thundertail said.

"We searched the whole territory. We tracked his scent as far as the WindClan border, then it was gone. They'd recently marked the trees. We couldn't have smelled farther if we'd tried," Thicketclaw added.

Windlegs felt her heart tighten. She tried to hide her distress, but Thicketclaw had been trained well.

"He's good at hiding his scent, isn't he? And I bet he got better in the rogue territories. If he wanted to be alone as bad as you say, then he probably hid his scent so no one would follow him. He'll be back," Thicketclaw said. Inside, she was boiling. She hadn't trusted Darkshadow to begin with. She'd offered him the benefit of the doubt for Windlegs's sake, but her shaky confidence in him was quickly evaporating. Still, she didn't want to voice her suspicion to Windlegs. She wouldn't rub salt in her friend's wounds. And besides, maybe Darkshadow really would return.

"Don't worry," Thundertail soothed. She glanced at Thicketclaw. The brown warrior had shared her theory with her earlier as they'd searched, but Thundertail didn't believe it. Darkshadow had done bad things in the past, it was true, but he loved Windlegs. He wouldn't lead her on just to abandon her once he'd gotten "what he wanted". He'd wanted Windlegs his entire life, and even if he hadn't, he just wasn't like that. Gone for half a year or not, Thundertail knew Darkshadow as well as Mudriver. Thicketclaw couldn't say the same.

"If he's not back by sundown, we should tell Blackstar," Windlegs said calmly. Her distress had vanished. "Something might have happened to him."

"He's not much of a sleeper. Maybe we should give him until tomorrow," Thicketclaw suggested.

Windlegs shook her head. "Someone else will have noticed he's missing by then. We should at least tell Blackstar early so he'll know from us. If he's not back by tomorrow, then we'll know that something's really wrong and Blackstar can take it from there."

Thundertail and Thicketclaw agreed.

"Can we tell Mudriver? He'll be worried," Thundertail said, noticing Mudriver sitting a few feet away shuffling his paws. He'd certainly noticed Darkshadow's absence by now and he'd connected Thundertail, Thicketclaw, and Windlegs with information on him.

Windlegs nodded. "He has as much right to know as we do."

Thundertail thanked Windlegs and went to her brother.

With the black she-cat gone, Windlegs's bravado deflated a little. Thicketclaw walked up to her and pressed her nose to Windlegs's shoulder. "It's probably nothing," she whispered. "He probably just got distracted and didn't realize how late it was getting. He'll be back before you know it and we'll all ream him out. It'll be fun."

"I'm worried," Windlegs said quietly. "Something inside me is telling me something's wrong."

Thicketclaw affectionately licked her friend's ears. She didn't know what to say or do. Speckledthorn had once told her that silence could be more comforting than soothing words, so she said nothing and hoped Windlegs would get the message.

Across the clearing, Stormthoughts and Clawfur were sitting alone, watching the scene. Clawfur was clearly agitated.

"We should tell them," Clawfur said. He paced back and forth a couple of times, then stopped to look at Windlegs and Thicketclaw, then at Mudriver and Thundertail, then paced again. "We should tell them. We could prevent this!"

_Keep your voice down, _Stormthoughts warned. She was lying down and looked much more relaxed than her brother, but her eyes were as cloudy as her name would suggest and her brows were ever-so-slightly knit together. _You know we aren't allowed to interfere._

"Then what's the point?" Clawfur asked in a harsh whisper. "What's the point of knowing? I hate knowing!"

_Do you think I like this anymore than you do? _Stormthoughts snapped.

Clawfur stopped his pacing and turned to his sister. "I'm sorry. It's just…I hurt. I hurt knowing that we could stop this, but we aren't allowed. I don't understand why we aren't allowed to stop it if we're allowed to know about it. It seems like we would be obligated to do something."

_This is bigger than us. We've known for a long time. And, really, I don't think we could stop it even if we tried._

"But shouldn't we at least try? He would want us to try. I can feel it. He's afraid. No one has ever fought for him before. Wouldn't it be only right for him to know that someone _tried_ for him, even if they failed?"

_We will wait and see. We don't know everything, brother. There could be something we haven't seen. Maybe you'll get what you want. In the mean time, stop pacing. You look ridiculous, not to mention suspicious._

Clawfur laid down next to his sister, resting his head on his paws miserably. Stormthoughts began to groom the fur between his ears, attempting to sooth his worry lines. It didn't work, but she wasn't surprised.

She was just as tense as he was, but she was better at hiding it. She pitied her brother, slightly. His emotions were made so strong. When he said he hurt, it was true. She could feel it cause him physical pain to lay beside her while the unsuspecting group worried for their friends. A twinge of pain went through her. Clawfur lifted his head and looked at her. The twinge had come from Stormthoughts.

_This…is more serious than I thought, _Clawfur said. He'd grown better at using their link, though he still preferred speech.

_It goes deeper than either of us thought. But it doesn't matter. His love is taken, _Stormthoughts replied.

Clawfur licked Stormthoughts's silver cheek. _He loves you…too. Just differently._

_It doesn't matter, _Stormthoughts sighed.

_It will always matter. _Clawfur nuzzled into his sister's side and watched as Windlegs, Thundertail, Thicketclaw, and Mudriver walked into Blackstar's den.

~X~

Darkshadow watched the moon rise over the mouth of his prison. Various warriors had cycled through to guard him. No one spoke to him and he hadn't heard anything from Darkstripe since their parting. The heavy, damp air became frigid as the outside cooled. The moon shone some light into the cave, but it couldn't quite reach the ShadowClan warrior. The light stopped just a few feet in front of Darkshadow.

"_What are you doing here?" _the moonlight seemed to ask. _"Don't you know you have a mate waiting for you back at your camp? I can see her, you know. She's worried about you."_

It felt like a vice was clamping down on Darkshadow's heart. Was Windlegs worried about him? He'd thought about what Darkstripe had said. Leaving had been stupid. Why hadn't he just told Windlegs his worries? They were mates, after all. They were supposed to share things. Why was he keeping things from her? Surely, if she truly loved him, she wouldn't hate him for all the terrible things he'd done while banished. She didn't hate him for the things he'd done before, just been a little upset for a while. Maybe, if he'd been honest with her, he wouldn't have had to kill Mutt. Maybe, if he'd been honest with her, he wouldn't have been banished in the first place. Reviewing his life, Darkshadow saw a lot of opportunities for him to change the outcome of his sorry existence. But he hadn't taken any of them and it was too late to go back. And here he was.

_Can you carry a message back to Windlegs for me? _Darkshadow asked the moonlight.

"_I can try," _it replied.

_Tell Windlegs I love her. And tell her I'm sorry._

The moon rose higher in the sky. The streak of light receded up the tunnel and disappeared. Darkshadow leaned against the back wall of the cave and stared at nothing.

_What have I done?..._

**Okay, so I found out Onewhisker became the leader after Tallstar and I was as surprised as Darkshadow. For anyone who liked Onewhisker as much as I did, I'm sorry I had to make him such an ass, but it was necessary. The reason I killed Tallstar and made Onewhisker leader was mainly because I thought it would be way too outlandish to have Tallstar behave this way so I manipulated the timeline so I could get a new, young leader that is just getting used to their position and wants to show strength. I wanted to keep the cannon leader, however, and so poor Onestar fell into my character-manipulation trap. Please forgive my constant ravaging of artistic liberty. Reviews keep Darkshadow warm tonight and make him, Windlegs, Thundertail, Mudriver, Thicketclaw, Stormthoughts, and Clawfur happy!**


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